'The Montana' School of Mines
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MI'NES , ~
April F~l -
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, PU:SLISHEDllY THE ASSOCIATEDSTOQGESOF THE MONTANASCHOOLOF MINES
Vol. 6, No. 11
April 1, 1960
President Joke Declares Hol,iday •
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. Because of a series of past events, which are dear to the hearts.~f the .faculty, President Joke has declared April ~ an official holiday at the Montana School of Min'es.Therefore, there, will-be no classes in session today, but it was announced by Doctor Nile, the only head of the physics departThe female students at Montana me~t, that ~hose taking physics 22 will be required to attend School of Mines are sponsoring class ten mmutes early on Monday to make up a pop quiz.
Neat -anc/ Tidy, Ana·Dh, So Duzzy
Clean-Up Week" starting next Mon.daymorning: ~s. Rail ;Sones, president of the ,female students, has announced the following appointments: •, '
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Miss Danet Artkinsun and Miss Handie Rallix have been appointed special chairladies in charge of cleaning up the Toffee Shoppe, Miss Artkinsun, who speclalizes in the excellent toffee produced by the shop, annoqnces that her special project will be the elimination of the bearded animals that have recently overrun the shoppe. She' proposes a thorough spraying with flit, Miss Handie Rallix will give the crockery in the shoppe its annual dunking in Tide. She has purchased scouring pads to insure an efficient cleaning.
In a personal interview with ace "Times" reporter Scoop Mackral Dr. Joke stated many reasons fo; the holiday, most important' of all was that it is his birthday. Being an 'All Fools Day baby, Dr. Joke has spent his years perpetuating a way of life for which the day is \.. known. Born and raised in Two Dot, Montana, .Dr. Joke spent his younger days studying and. preparing for a brilli nt military and 1 devoted civil life. He was graduated from the Montana Western· School of Education, a school famous for Iearning and difficult curriculums. Since then he has served in the army as a full kernal and is now retired and living at the Montana School of Mines of Which he said, "I don't worry. Even if the food is bad, the rent is free." l
The clubroom of the female students at the Mines is scheduled for a thorough cleaning., Miss April 1 also marks the 15th ~nDreamY,Secretson is to gather up I , niversary of Dale Pink-knee's reJ i and dispo~e of such clutter as old tirement from active professional combs, fingernail polish bottles, baseball. Mr. Pink-knee was born pop bottles, books, and male inand raised on the FI~thead resertruders .. The two-cent refund on '1 \ vation where he was discovered each pop bottle will be used to by a scout from the Red Sox tribe. purchase refreshments for the It is quite true, Dr. A: J. Smythe Although his pink knee clashed clean-up crew. declared, that the Presiderl.tof the with 'his red sox, Dale played as ,Montana Iristitute of Tedhnology a terrific stop-short and in his Mrs. Dauline Mutter and Miss Dandy Sadlock have hired a' truck announced that April 1 would be' last stason was voted the most a holiday from classes in celebra- valuable player by every tribe exHistory indicates that the MSM; ing action in the gymnasium, di- and will supervise 'the removal of tion of his own happy un-birthday, cept the Red Sox. He is now a rectly affecting the position of the broken furniture, old clothes and campus was constructed on. a. plot; but too little attention Is !'Paidto ~ember pf the school faculty and of ground covering the _Mint and basketball backboards" (as verified worn-out -fencingequipment. Tony the p e 0 pie who second these 'gives classes between sick spells. Vanderbilt lodes. This lack of fore- by certain members of the basket- the Trader will be given a chance things...!.'Ihave more fortitude and When interviewed Mr. Pink-knee I to bid on the equipment. ' sipnt by the founding fathers has ball team). calculus than any "other man stated, "I don't worry either." I resulted in a condition of imminent Reactions to the transfer of , An extra feature of the clean-up around here, but I'm rapidly being peril to our educational facil!ties. schools are varied. Many of the Thirdly, the day marks the 2nd campaign will be carried on by driven to' the violin," and' he week anniversafY of Prof. ChrisLast ~eek, officials from the students and faculty have reaffirm- Miss Bonnie Careless and Miss stamped his foot. toffers' movement to persecute all' Montana State Board of Education ed their .intentionsto stay until the Silly Fastarunno and Miss Double sophomores in an attempt to get scheduled the present site of the last brick has 'crumbled, especially Decker. They are preparing a se~even with the person who wrote §ince the student union building is Montana School of M\inesfor conies of posters to illustrate proper a letter to the editor criticizing demnation in fiscal year 1961. At scheduled to be completed this campus attire for male students at Mr. Christoffers' teaching meththat time, students will be trans- spring. the Mines.,The proper' attire will by Rip Van Winkle \ ods. This movement has lent ferred to the facilities at the WestWhatever response this' impend- show new blue jeans, white shirts Again this week, the No.1 and streng~hto ~ simila~movement alern Montana College of Education ing catastrophE\may elicit, one can- an1 well-polished oxfords. The at Dillon; however, a problem re- not help feeling a tinge of nostal- campaign will push elimination of No.2 tunes are "Sleepy Time Sal" re~d~ ill eXlStenc:m the mathemand "Brahm's Bop" respectfully. ahcs. ~nd .phYSICSdepartments, lating to the expeditious transfer gia to think of the MSM campus, slide rules in the hip pockets. (or irrespec.tfully). Elvin Pressme and I~ISbelievedr that throug~1t~e of credits has arisen at this time. that glorious organ of enlightenhas a new dIsk out called .•• call/ed comb~ed effor:s of th~. ~lg The President, WMCOE, has re- ment sinking into a mire of oblivmarked: "We stand opposed to thjl ion. "Ashes to ashe_§,dust to dust 'S·lgma (~ell if they don't call it'may- Thr!,!e there WIll be no Juruor be #1 will go away). The Two clas~ at MSM next.fall. When ininflux of impetuous bumpkins who I •• (S'trike up the Violins,please!) Squirrels aTe soaring' high with ~,ervlewed,Mr. Chrlstoffer,sstated, would tend to ,corrupt the high ,Y legas ,. their rendition of "The Bavarian .Why sho,uld I w9rry? 1 have al,moral standards, and i~tellectual The most expensive ite~ in a NlJtional Apthem in C-Minor",. ready taken physical chemistry." : acu~en of our prosp,ectlVeteach-, bachelor's budget is a young lady Last week the Sigma Rho Fra•i . .' ers. who is 'free for the evening. 1lernity decided to take a hop to The teenagers 'are waltzing .to In a fmal statemeI?-tIssued by Las Vegas.. Due to their incredible, such great programs as the "ThrU- Dr., JO.ke.congratulatIOns went to Among the discrepancies noted by thJ of¥cials war!}: (1) Seep,age Tenant:. How lOng.will it be be- gambling ability and financial re- ty-Sixty" and the "Top Ten Thou- Mr. PInk-knee and Mr. Christofserves not to mention their won- sand", while adults are mostly con- fers, and, the rest of the faculty of water into the Co-ed room, fore you fIXthat leaky roof? ostensibly due to a "dog-leg" fault Owner: What do you think I am, derful' ability at sop'pingsuds, they tented with ,"Drinking Green Beer, and sh~~ent body were w:ished.a thought this,would be worthwhile Rum and' CocoCola". ' , happy Joke Day" by the preSIin the old Mint Lode. (2) A settl- a prophet? I escapade. dent. \ Up-and-comers.in the music field The trip going' down was great ,include "Hold Me, Kiss Me, Take for those who were vertical long My Physics Poppers for Me" and enough to remember it. But all "Ma, He Wants to Deduct' Points Mr. Ki Hyun Kim ofl the Inter" turned out headachy .well as they for Spelling". APRIL / natronal Clubfrom Montana School slid into Vegas. All! at once the of Mines extends his heartiest Rho men marveled at the magnifi3 Khrushchev speaks at 1st semester coritmence~ thanks to~allpeople connectedwith cent money-making devices that ment the "BOOKDRIVE FOR KOREA." were to be had, and therefore made 8 Faculty spo~sors beer bust in 00ed gO,qduse of them., That night, regro~ping,.they couldn't figure, olit Special thanks is· extended to 11-15 Recuperation week for the liVeSof themselves where Professor Ralph 'Smith, adviser ,of \ 20 Closing up sale at U&I the silvery stuff went. But such a The, governor of only one state, the International Club,,and,t~ Mrs. 23 Graduate studen~s' weiner roast mere crisis comes as no shock to J. Hugo Aronson of Montana, was Lennea Favero for her outstanding the Rho men, because it seems was born outside the U. S. (in work in .collecting books for the 30 Ma Tait's Rodeo from Whitehall in circle at Sweden) drive. ' 8:00 a.m. i this ;wasn't the first of its kind., -:::--' ---' ---,--------'"1'7'------,----------As is heard the Rho boys have all MAYreturned under their own power U e,am OS 00 34 Tom "Duggin" Conway's. Pinochle champion"their feet," but some are ~till payIn celebra'tion of National Library Week, the citizens of Butte' ship in co:(fee shop ing off debts, either being cigarette turned out in force. "In Boston they ban them," one citizen sneered girls or ballet dancers, incidently, "but ,in Butte, when we celebrate, we celebrate-no sissy stuff! W~ JUNESid Brown makes a beautif~ ballet had more smoke going up than a Back Bay I~dian. That Boston is 5 Sophomores exempt from calculus f~nal dancer. nothing but April Fool and k.id stuff."
Smythe Himsell
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Exten'ds Tha,nks
·Coming E,vents
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