PUFFIN BOOKS
Books by Alexander Slater
THE WAR OF THE WURMS
THE PURRFECT CRIME
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First published 2026 001
Text and illustrations copyright © Alexander Slater, 2026
Author photograph © Leslie-Anne Orlans
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A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library isbn: 978–0–241–67059–0
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To Mum and Dad, for giving me all the support in the galaxy.
1The Purple Comet
Deep in the far reaches of the universe, comfortably enveloped between space and stars, was the cosmic realm of Galaxandria – an absurd, ever-shifting world where towns, countries and whole continents were housed on planets, all in constant orbit of each other. It was a land that annoyed logic and infuriated mapmakers.
At the very centre of Galaxandria was Castle Town, the capital city. The sun and morning moons rose over its grand streets to awaken its sleeping residents, who had no clue that high above their quiet, snoozy town was a blazing purple comet, hurtling towards them at full speed.
WHOOOOOOOSH!
The violet fireball tore through the clouds, plummeting faster and faster on a collision course with Castle Town. Then, just before it smashed into the ground, it took a sharp turn and zoomed through the streets. A barrage of letters fired from it and landed precisely in post flaps and on doormats. Navigating the streets’ tight corners, the comet slowed down just enough to reveal who was behind its fiery purple blur. It was Celeste Starwing, Galaxandria’s cosmic postmaster.
Her golden star-shaped hair flailed behind her as she rocketed through town with its morning mail. Using her magic jacket, she glided around gardens, banked around bridges and soared through the streets. The townsfolk emerged from their homes to collect their post and happily waved as she flew by.
‘Hey, they’re racing again!’ Celeste heard one of them cry out from their doorway. ‘Go, Celeste, go!’
Celeste came to an abrupt stop above the rooftops, and frantically looked around to catch sight of her opponent. It might just be a friendly competition, but she still wasn’t fond of losing. Seeing the coast was clear, she pulled out three large bundles of tightly wrapped letters from her satchel.
‘BONNIE, BLUFORD, BUZZ!’
she shouted.
On to the closest building hopped three stardust bunnies – magical little rabbits made of golden, crystalized stardust who, like Celeste, wore matching purple post-officer uniforms. They saluted as she called their names. ‘He can’t be far behind. Quick, deliver these!’ She chucked them a bundle of letters each and the bunnies quickly jumped down from the roof to hand them out to the people on the street.
Celeste flew up high into the air. Grabbing an armful of post, she twirled ferociously and released it with a flourish, painting the morning sky with
fireworks of envelopes that magically fluttered down to the exact doors where they needed to be delivered. She pulled one last letter from her bag and looked across town to where she had to take it: town hall, the finish line. She could see a small crowd had gathered there, including her fellow post-officer pal Oswald, who was waiting beneath the clock tower.
Celeste shot off in one last dash. She thundered through the air so fast that her postmaster cap nearly flew off her head. Swooping into the square and skidding along the cobbles, Celeste threw her final letter. It landed precisely in the town-hall letterbox just before the clock struck nine.
GONNNGGGG!
WINNER!
The crowd cheered Celeste, who took a bow. She was the victor of this morning’s postal race!
Oswald clapped, looking at the clock. ‘W-wow, that was your f-fastest time yet!’ the young goblin stuttered in amazement. Bonnie, Bluford and Buzz caught up, clapping as Celeste climbed the town-hall steps.
‘What can I say? I’m the fastest postmaster there’s ever been!’ Celeste beamed, ecstatic she’d beaten her own record. ‘Good morning, Galaxandria! It’s good to be back!’ The crowd settled down as she addressed them. ‘I know you’re all excited to receive your morning deliveries courtesy of the Celeste Express parcel service. Unfortunately, my opponent isn’t quite as fast as yours truly, but I’m sure he’ll be along any minute . . .’ Celeste trailed off with dramatic effect.
Right on cue, she could hear her rival approaching: a loud rattling, and the sound of hooves. Then, in the blink of an eye, her best friend, Podge, came hurtling into town on top of a large wagon being pulled by a wild, flying creature made of golden stardust.
The Celeste Express parcel service used to operate with the help of hundreds of stardust bunnies like Bonnie, Bluford and Buzz, who could turn themselves into boxes to deliver goods. But then all but a few stardust bunnies had to leave the post office after they merged their dusty bodies to stop a giant wormhole from destroying Galaxandria. Now the post officers had to deliver most of the items by hand, along with the few remaining bunnies – some of whom had combined to form a speedy winged bunny-horse, which Celeste had appropriately named . . .
‘Rockett!’
she cried. The galloping stardust stallion came crashing into the town square. Rockett cantered around them a few times before finally halting. He happily stamped his feet in greeting.
‘I’m sorry, Celeste,’ Podge apologized, sounding a bit shaken. ‘He came in too fast to slow down.’
‘It’s OK – no harm done. And, actually, not fast enough. I still made all my deliveries before you got here. Better luck next time, big guy!’ she teased Rockett. ‘Come on, let’s get these delivered!’
Celeste opened the back of the wagon, revealing a plethora of parcels and packages. The impatient crowd hurried around them, eager to get their post.
Then Celeste and Oswald, with the help of Bonnie, Bluford and Buzz, handed out everyone’s packages while Podge tried his best to keep Rockett from blasting off again.
But there was one member of the crowd who was not rushing to get their mail. Among the happy customers, Celeste could’ve sworn she saw a short, hooded figure, watching the post-office crew closely. But, as soon as she blinked, the skulking shadow had disappeared.
Mount Unpleasant 2
Lunchtime! After a busy morning, Celeste, Podge and Oswald flew back to the post office for a well-deserved break. They swooped through the double doors and under a brand-new sign that read CELESTE EXPRESS: THE INTERGALACTIC POST OFFICE. The inside of the shop was still as messy as the day Celeste had first arrived. Tall stacks of mail towered over the shop floor – a reminder of all the years the post office had stood shut. But they were steadily working their way through it all. And, in the meantime, in the middle of the entrance hall, they’d pushed a large pile of post together to form a table and set of chairs from which to eat their lunch. Celeste plonked
herself down at the head of the table. She removed a neatly wrapped prismberry-jam sandwich and a large packet of Melton’s Prawn-flavoured Crunchy Stars from her satchel, then proceeded to devour them. Podge sat next to her and tucked into a lunch of chocolate comets, a sugar-frosted honey loaf and a big bottle of ornana juice. Oswald, the only one eating something sensible, sat on the other end of the table with some homemade hosskar-tusk soup with a side of buttered goblin bread. He looked at the pair in disbelief – how could they eat sweets and junk all the time?
‘Y-you two should try eating s-some real food for a change,’ he suggested.
‘Meh, I used to eat birthday cake twice a week, so I’d say this is an improvement,’ Celeste said, picking bits of prismberry seed out of her teeth. She’d polished off her lunch so fast that the stardust bunnies hadn’t even arrived yet to have theirs. Now Rockett clipclopped into the post-office entrance hall and burst into the seven bunnies from which he was made: Rupert, Otto, Cubert, Koko, Evie, Tuffy and Tott, who ran to the pile of carrots waiting for them. Then, lastly, Bonnie, Bluford and Buzz hopped through the door as
well, but they had a few last deliveries to make before they could enjoy their lunch.
‘Yes! Mail’s here!’ Celeste said excitedly. Now it was the post officers’ turn to get post.
Bonnie bounced over to Oswald and presented him with a letter and a large brown envelope.
‘A letter from home, and . . . Y-YES!’ He cheered as he opened the brown envelope. ‘The l-latest issue of Magi-Zine!’ Oswald proudly held up his new copy of Magi-Zine, the magical magazine that leaves its readers spellbound.
Magic in Galaxandria was a bit like art in our world. Everyone can scribble a stick figure on a scrap of paper, but it takes a lifetime of practice and study to paint a masterpiece. Similarly, in Galaxandria everyone can waggle their finger and shoot
out a pathetic puff of smoke, but with years of training and the proper know-how it could become a blazing fireball. However, schools of sorcery were expensive, so many aspiring wizards like Oswald subscribed to Magi-Zine to get their fix of the magical arts. He particularly enjoyed the free spell lessons on the back and started reading them intently.
Bluford's delivery was next. He hopped over to Podge and gave him an envelope sealed with a brightblue wax stamp.
‘Look, I got a letter from my pen pal!’ He beamed, pointing at the wax seal which was embossed with a decorative emblem of a fish and the letter Z.
‘He’s studying medicine at the Zendarr College of Alchemy!’
‘P-potions?’ Oswald was impressed. ‘Amazing! W-what d-does he say?’ Podge opened the letter, but his happy expression quickly fizzled away.
‘Uh . . . I don’t know. It’s all written in Zendarrian.’
He showed the letter to the others, and they could see
it was written in a strange language of unreadable runes and markings. ‘It’s a long letter too. This will take some time to translate.’
Podge sighed, concentrating hard and seeing if there were any parts he could understand.
Celeste twiddled her thumbs. ‘So . . . any post for me?’ she asked. Buzz, the last stardust bunny, looked through his tiny satchel but squeaked sadly. His bag was empty. ‘Oh . . .’ she muttered, disappointed.
‘Nothing from your dad?’ Podge asked. Celeste silently shook her head. ‘He is the king after all, he’s a busy person. Maybe you’ll hear from him tomorrow.’
‘Maybe,’ Celeste said with a glum voice, staring up at the portrait of her mother that hung above the front desk.
Celeste had never known her mother. Growing up, her father had never spoken about her, but ever
since he’d tasked Celeste with running the post office – which had turned out to be her mother’s –he’d begun to open up. He had written to Celeste about how her mother had been a good queen to the people of Galaxandria, how she used to read Celeste the fairy tale The Starry Knight every evening before bed as a toddler and of her interest in ancient astral archaeology. But, if Celeste was being honest, it was all a bit dull.
These dribs and drabs of information hardly helped paint a picture, and she ached to know more. What Celeste really wanted was her mother’s letters. Before she had died, her mother had written seven letters to Celeste and they were somewhere under the masses of undelivered mail in the post office, waiting to be found. But it’d been months since Celeste had begun her search and she had yet to find a single one. These letters teased Celeste. Not only because she couldn’t find them, but also because she wanted to know why they had been written in the first place.
What was so tantalizingly important that it required seven letters to tell her? And what was in them that seemingly no one else knew? Surely, they would reveal more about the mother she desperately wished she’d known.
‘Oh!’ Podge suddenly cried. ‘Actually, I have something for you! Over here.’ He jumped off his seat and waved to the others to follow him to the front desk. ‘Behold!’ He held his arms out, presenting them with . . . the floor, which was covered in a thin layer of envelopes. Celeste and Oswald stared at them, blankly.
‘Podge, what are we supposed to be looking at?’ Celeste grumbled.
‘Oh, sorry. Hang on.’ He bent down and swept away the loose letters, revealing a narrow pair of rails that ran under their feet.
‘Are these t-tracks?’ Oswald asked.
‘Yeah, watch this!’ Podge pulled a large lever behind the front desk, which caused a cranking, mechanical noise to rattle all around the entrance
hall. Then a large, chunky cart wheeled its way along the tracks and screeched to a halt in front of them.
‘What’s this?’ Celeste asked keenly.
‘It’s the old mail-cart system,’ Podge explained as he pushed the cart, and Celeste and Oswald followed. The cart looked heavy and was big enough to fit all three of them, but it rolled along the rails quite easily.
‘Back in the heyday of the post office, sending post was so popular that they needed a way of transporting and organizing it all. So, the early post officers dug a space below the surface of the planet, a giant cellar under the post office, and built a network of mine carts to manage it all.’
Celeste snorted at hearing this as the trio reached a large pair of double doors.
‘This planet is far too small to need an entire network of carts to navigate it.’ She laughed. Podge used the cart to push open the double doors and, on seeing what was on the other side, Celeste stopped giggling. She gasped at the sight of an impossibly massive cave so deep and enormous that she could not see where it ended.
This wasn’t just a cellar: it was a bottomless abyss of rock, stone . . . and letters. To Celeste’s horror, the entire cave was filled with even more undelivered mail than there was in the shop itself. All around it was a vast, intricate network of twisting tracks sprawling out in every direction and disappearing deep into the chasms below.
‘The inside of this p-planet seems m-much bigger than the outside . . .’ Oswald stuttered, equally stunned by the sheer size of the cave under the post office.
‘Yep! This small planet is GIGANTIC on the inside!’ Podge’s words echoed cheerfully. ‘The dimensions must be a bit backwards, but it makes a handy place to store the excess post.’
Celeste’s face was paper-white. One abnormally large mountain of letters stood taller than all the rest and had tunnels excavated for the rails to run through it. ‘I call that one Mount Unpleasant,’ Podge said, noticing her looking at it. ‘Because I don’t look forward to dealing with it.’
‘My mum’s letters are under all this, aren’t they . . .’ Celeste winced.
‘I would guess at least some of them are, yes. That’s why me and the bunnies have been fixing the old cart system – we wanted to surprise you.’ Podge patted on the cart reassuringly. ‘When it’s finished,