Kaleidoscope 2020
About the Cover “Insomnia” is a digital illustration created by Elise Gharibian. The inspiration came from nightmares that were personified to allow her to have “something to blame.”
About Kaleidoscope An annual publication, Kaleidoscope was first published in 1998. Students in the ENG 025 Creative Writing class are responsible for many phases of creating the magazine. Kaleidoscope is funded by the college and supported by James L. Preston, Vice President of Educational Services; Debbie Rose, Senior Secretary of Educational Services; and the Arts & Letters Faculty. The writers and artists are members of the student body, faculty, and staff of West Hills College Lemoore. Throughout the year, David Brooks (davidbrooks@whccd.edu) and Kristen Kennedy (kristenkennedy@whccd.edu) accept the art submissions, and Neomi Daniels (neomidaniels@whccd.edu) accepts the written submissions. Curated By ENG 025 Creative Writing Class Editorial Board David Brooks, Neomi Daniels, Marty Ennes, Libra Howard, and Kristen Kennedy Layout and Design All Valley Printing
Daughters of Triton by Cat Hagerty
All rights revert back to the authors and artists upon publication. Each written work, drawing, photograph, or graphic creation remains the copyrighted property of its creator.
2020
The Seven Seals by Gavorg Gharibian
Engraved Your Name in my Hand by Gavorg Gharibian
Contents Prose and Poetry My Hero by Toni Chwalek ..........................1
Deppth by Viviana Quezada-Ramirez.....8
Fight Against Death
Soul Eater
by Lilia Rodriguez-Bogarin ..................2 Ballet on a Wire by Cat Hagerty .................3 Ode to Body Dysmorphia
by Viviana Quezada-Ramirez ...........10 Marilyn Manson by Samanta Martinez ........................10
by Juan Huerta ......................................5
Mystic Leopard by Luke Garcia ............11
a history of fury by denise mckendell .........6
I’ve Been Saving All my Summers for You
After All by Katie Farrell .............................7
by Ashley Torres ...............................13
My Treasure by Toni Chwalek ....................8
Girls Kick Ass by Sydney Hawkes .......15
I Am by Nadia Frausto ................................9
Cinderella by Cat Hagerty ....................16
Universal Fear by Matthew Alvarez .........11
Sweet and Subtle Love
Puzzle by Erik Avila ..................................12
by Viridiana Padilla ..........................17
Loving You by April Delgado ....................13
3 Moods by Shelby Inman .....................18
you taught me by Alijah West ...................14
Satyr by Jayden Lozada .........................19
relapse and repeat by Kitzia Arreguin ......16
Hunger (Crush)
in glow of morning
by Samanta Martinez ........................19
by denise mckendell ............................20
Naturaleza by Jocelyn Rodriguez .........20
A Spring Sickness by Juan Huerta .............21
Tranquility by Kyle Steele .....................22
Illustrations Insomnia by Elise Gharibian ......Cover Page Daughters of Triton by Cat Hagerty ............I The Seven Seals by Gavorg Gharibian .......II Engraved Your Name in my Hand by Gavorg Gharibian ..........................III
Three Rivers by Jayden Lozada .............22 Zoo Chimera by Jayden Lozada ............23 Señora de la Muerte by Luke Garcia .................................24 Age is Just a Number by Shelby Inman ...............................25 Above the Sea Fog
Unknown Soldier by John Abad ..................1
by Ernest Sandoval ...........................26
Springtime by Luke Garcia .........................4
Pieces of a Kid by Kyle Steele ..............30
Creation by Samanta Martinez ...................5
Charlie by Elise Gharibian ....................31
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My Hero by Toni Chwalek I thought we found forever But our time was cut short When duty called, you ran My freedom you secured The future we would plan While we walked together We could have never known Your unit would go under I planned to walk in white Yet here I grieve in black Our time together treasured I’ll never get you back
Unknown Soldier by John Abad
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Fight against Death by Lilia Rodriguez-Bogarin Withering body, don’t lose your fight Keep on trying to stay alive Body aches, can barely move But I’m smiling to hide the truth Familiar faces care for me Trying to talk but can hardly speak Withering body, don’t lose your fight Keep on trying to stay alive Sweetest dreams that come to me Seeing people no one else can see Confusing thoughts not helping me Oh, why is this happening Can’t catch my breath but staying strong I’m trying to hold on Sound is distant, something’s wrong I squeeze a hand, is all hope gone Withering body, don’t lose your fight Keep on trying to stay alive Body’s giving up But know I’ve tried I’m not leaving without a fight Withering body, give me time Cause I’m not ready to say goodbye
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Ballet on a Wire by Cat Hagerty A wire so narrow, the altitude so high. Their cheers are like sweet music; the lights are like stars. My heart is pounding; my face is stone cold. With toes on point, I take my first step. A pirouetteA leap! Narrowly escaping the fall— The crowd goes wild! Like chittering doves. I can feel the wire shaking. As I hold myself steady, wind urges me forward, heart pulls me back. The wire now steady, I must reach the end. With a deep breath— I make my next move. Assemble in the sky! Through dazzling lights, I have reached the end, But it’s only the beginning.
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Springtime by Luke Garcia
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An Ode to Body Dysmorphia by Juan Huerta Why do I think of you far too often? I can’t stop the tears that surge Maybe this is a sign that I have softened The curve of your ears that reach too far Or the jiggle of the love you hold dear Make you realize you are not on par You are a funhouse mirror You do not let me see what is there You force me to leer The light bends in directions I can’t control Let there be me Again, I fall into this hatred hole Why do you torment me so?
Creation by Samanta Martinez
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a history of fury by denise mckendell a history of fury an account of rage both judge and jury condemnation and cage fist and face impact and impactor unforgiveness and grace light and refractor the aim and the target shot and shooter finisher and starter enlisted and recruiter art and the artist wound and the wounded famine and the harvest the elitist and excluded historical violence given and received void of silence rightfully aggrieved
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After All by Katie Farrell You think you are alone? You are wrong. After all, you brought me home. You want to stop? You can try, you will fail. After all, once I have you I don’t let go. You haven’t noticed how easily I dragged you into my world. How could you? After all, my words are your leash. You haven’t realized how addicting our relationship is. After all, I give you what you crave. You are no longer in control, go ahead and leave me. You’ll come crawling back begging for more. After all, you chose me from the bookstore shelf.
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My Treasure by Toni Chwalek Cast into the wild You were my best find My arms and home open I made you mine Food and shelter I freely gave Your love and presence Was how you repaid A man’s best friend But a woman’s treasure You were there for me When there was no other Ten years for me But a lifetime for you I now say goodbye To my best friend forever
Deppth by Viviana Quezada-Ramirez
9 I Am by Nadia Frausto I am from my mom who chose drugs over me and my brother and from my father who spent most of my childhood in and out of jail due to gangs and drugs I am from a small town called Tulare where drugs are the normal thing to see where violence is an every day thing I am from a place where some people don’t make it to the next day because of drug overdoses or violence but I am living proof that’s not for everyone I am from a place most people consider the ghetto I am from a place most people look down at you and say you can’t do it and will end up like the rest Most don’t make it to high school and drop out if they do and don’t even get to see college as an opportunity I am from a place where people hustle and do whatever to make money to support their families I am from everyone in that town who is either in child services or welfare I am from a place where they sell drugs or go into prostitution just to make ends meet Where I am from people really don’t succeed but I am living proof that’s wrong I am from a mother who chose to abandon her kids to live her own life I am a girl who was sexually physically and mentally abused I am the girl that the teachers told my grandparents who later adopted me and became my mom and dad that I was never going to make it through high school I was going to end up like my biological parents getting pregnant doing drugs and repeating the same scenario but I am living proof that’s not true Even though my life is not as perfect as I wanted it to be those things I went through as a kid shaped me into the person I am most people use their life situations for good or for bad but I used the situation I went through as a kid to keep moving forward and I proved those elementary teachers wrong I did graduate high school and went to college oh yeah and this girl also has a learning disability but I am living proof that it won’t stop me if I keep pushing forward trusting God and follow my dreams I can be anything I want if I put my mind into it and I want to share my story to people who had my situation or even worse to just show them that they can turn the bad situation into a positive I am that girl who is now in college and halfway through her dream of becoming a special education teacher
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Soul Eater by Viviana Quezada-Ramirez
Marilyn Manson by Samanta Martinez
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Universal Fear by MatthewAlvarez Growing up it was always such a scary idea An almost living entity that would come daily Regardless of preparation or not It would always come and stay for hours Cold chills running down the spine for some But for some happiness that it has come so soon It is a concept most children fear Running into bed with their parents Or sleeping with the light on But what should be feared exactly Maybe the idea that nothing can be seen Or more frightening the concept of anything can be lurking Although not all people find it to be so scary Some see an opportunity or an awakening Sweet smells and busingly streets While others are filled with sorrow that it has come so soon Cold tears running down their faces Regardless emotion is an unknown concept to this being But one aspect is always consistent Not only does it happen every day But for some it can follow at any point in the day Causing tension and reprension But one thing is for sure Darkness always finds its way
Mystic Leopard by Luke Garcia
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Puzzle by Erik Avila Never throughout these years Mind blindness1 that we expected What do we do The world is small Together we’ll grow This puzzle is just beginning Let's find the corners to start... Walking on your toes twirling and twirling Let’s wait... Are you ready to start Is it hard to sit still Hey... Listen I can only interpret what his mind says... I am happy every day I am special just like you I keep my thoughts I keep quiet like a mouse Odd...Never The pieces will always fit Together will finish the puzzle One piece is missing... I’ll be here until the last piece is found... ¹ Mind blindness refers to a spectrum disorder Autism
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Loving you by April Delgado It seemed like a joke The way your gaze passes through mine I have loved you For what seems like a thousand years Loving you felt like a gentle breeze Warm and sweet and nice Your friendship meant the world to me Until the day you moved on To another who had the courage to ask What I wouldn’t do To turn back the clock To gain a second chance You deserve love Mine was too hesitant Mine was too cautious I love you Was forever silent on these cold lips.
I’ve Been Saving All my Summers for You by Ashley Torres
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you taught me by Alijah West to the men that raised me first a vape pen in my underwear drawer was more important than making sure your daughter had a warm bed to the first man that raised me you taught me love is built on your terms to the men that raised me second all you saw was his unzipped jeans not thinking i was only twelve i didn’t know what sex was to the second man that raised me you taught me i should be ashamed of my developing body to the men that raised me third when you bashed her head in and left us stranded you were allowed back into our lives to the third man that raised me you taught me violence isn’t always behind closed doors to the men that raised me you taught me you are not men
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Girls Kick Ass by Sydney Hawkes
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relapse and repeat by Kitzia Arreguin and I was happy I was happy with the person I was becoming I was starting to fall in love again with the sounds of bees buzzing in the spring I was no longer afraid to be alone in the dark I was comfortable spending time with myself I was no longer writing drunk and revising sober I was just writing as the words flowed out and I was happy my heart was healing the feelings were fading and the memories were no longer vivid Cinderella by Cat Hagerty I was laughing and singing I was smiling at strangers and dancing on sidewalks I was driving and exploring new places I was traveling and venturing out to try new things and I was happy but then You came back i'm good enough again You want me again and suddenly the nightmares came back i cried myself back to sleep on most nights and being alone became hard i think too much i can’t keep up and just like before this feels all too familiar but it’s comfortable i watched myself crumble down and fall apart i have to be Your pretty girl* while You sat down at home and smiled You’d never hurt me you love me sharpening the knife You’d inevitably jab back into my heart and i was happy or so i thought *Pretty Girl- by Clairo, a song about being molded into someone else's ideal
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Sweet and Subtle Love by Viridiana Padilla
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3 Moods by Shelby Inman
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Satyr by Jayden Lozada
Hunger (Crush) by Samanta Martinez
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in glow of morning by denise mckendell in glow of morning into sea green eyes caramel skin melding with mine put you on like silk both smooth and cool on axis we tilt limbs and bodies pooled in glow of morning love rising like the sun touches and kisses ever soothing hum ear to chest hearts racing again cheek to breast perspiring skin
in glow of morning I taste your skin together forever like next of kin forgetting tomorrow as the day rolls in stealing away time like unforgiven sin in glow of morning you call out to me searching for my love like hide and seek grasping for my touch like that of a babe tightening your clutch locked in my gaze in glow of morning I am with you
in glow of morning speaking in hushed tones with laughter rising amongst tossed bones in a closet of secrets both yours and mine hidden in the deepest recesses of our minds
Naturaleza by Jocelyn Rodriguez
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A Spring Sickness by Juan Huerta A fever burns my soul so hungrily Pink for my innocence Red for my anger and love The two are not mutually exclusive Purple for my regality Darkness drapes over my body Yet it does not consume me It offers a reprieve Where the Zephyrs glide on my skin Where I might dance with mischievous nymphs Where I see light rather than dark figures This fever is one of life
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Tranquility by Kyle Steele
Three Rivers by Jayden Lozada
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Zoo Chimera by Jayden Lozada
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Señora de la Muerte by Luke Garcia
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Age is Just a Number by Shelby Inman
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Above the Sea Fog by Ernest Sandoval
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Biographies John Abad is a Hanford artist. He started drawing when he was in the service and studies social science and humanities at WHCL. He took drawing to improve his skills. Matthew Alvarez is from Hanford, and he is majoring in English at WHCL. Kitzia Arreguin is from Visalia, and she is majoring in English. She is one of six children, three of which are half brothers and sisters. During her spare time, she enjoys writing short poems and going to concerts with her friends. After finishing up her studies at WHCL, she plans to transfer to Cal Poly San Luis Obispo to pursue a doctorate in literature.
April Delgado is from Huron, and she is majoring in English. She loves to travel and go to the gym. She also loves to read and write. Nadia Frausto is a student at West Hills College Lemoore. Katie Farrell is from Hanford, and she is very open with her creativity. Luke Garcia is from Hanford, and he is a creative digital artist and very outgoing. Elise Gharibian lives in Hanford with her parents and two cats. She has been drawing since she could hold a pencil and has, unfortunately, used that skill for only chaos.
Erik Avila is from Hanford and his goal is to become a teacher to show students how education is important and coach them the correct way.
Gavorg Gharibian lives in Hanford with his wife and daughter. Art has always been his passion and an important part of his life.
Toni Chwalek is from Lemoore, and she plans on becoming a high school English teacher.
Cat Hagerty is from a small town. She has four dogs and a loving family.
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Biographies Sydney Hawkes is from San Diego. Girls Kick Ass is a self-portrait done to reflect her affinity for skate culture as well as paying tribute to her adoration of pop art. Juan Huerta was a student at WHCL and currently attends CSU Fresno. Shelby Inman is from Lemoore, and she is interested in all things art and design. She plans to go into the field of interior architecture and design. Jayden Lozada is a talented artist, digital designer, and a student at West Hills. Denise McKendell is a poet and playwright. She has a bachelor’s degree from Fresno Pacific University. She earned an AA in Social Science and an AA in Humanities from WHCL. She is a performing arts director for Philadelphia Outreach Ministries in Lemoore. Samanta Martinez is from Avenal. She is 20 years old, the oldest of five, and a creative illustrator and artist.
Viridiana Padilla is from Riverdale and loves spending time with family. She had never submitted any piece of art anywhere and is excited about this new experience. She never took an art class. Viviana Quezada-Ramirez is from Hanford, and she is an only child. She grew up with her cousins in Los Angeles and began to draw as a young child. Her goals in life are to travel the world and to see the ceiling frescoes painted on amazing architectures. Jocelyn Rodriguez is from Lemoore but grew up in Avenal. She has a love for paint, especially for oil and loves drawing. She and her family enjoy music and working on art projects together. Lilia Rodriguez-Bogarin is from Tulare but was born in Los Angeles. Lilia is married and has six children. Her sole purpose of existence is her family. She says, “They are my rock.” She hopes to eventually become a college instructor.
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Biographies Ernest Sandoval is an art major and has been painting for 8 years, and he loves bright colors. He has been living in Hanford for two years. Kyle Steele is from Lemoore, and he is currently pursuing a degree in studio art. His interests include professional boxing, studying aquatic life, and automobiles. Ashley Torres is from Armona and has always adored art. The fascination of fictional worlds has consumed her and became a part of her everyday life. Alijah West is an English major and is about to finish her very first year of college. She’s excited to continue.
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Pieces of a Kid by Kyle Steele
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Charlie by Elise Gharibian
Kaleidoscope 2020 ENG 25 Creative Writing Class Matthew Alvarez Kitzia Arreguin Erik Avila Randy Barba Toni Chwalek April Delgado Jane Dustin Luke Garcia Cat Hagerty Xander Kong Alex Mejia Jesenia Mendez Kyra Moon Miguel Ramirez Lilia Rodriguez-Bogarin Fred Scott Jennifer Villalobos Adam Warchol Alijah West Ruth Wooten