March 27, 2016
g n i d d e W e Th Issue
THE FLORAL EXPERIENCE! Headlined by Rockstar Florist - JEFF LEATHAM
27/03 Contents
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13
e m a i l : a l l u r e fo r t h e wo rl d @ v a n g u a r d n g r. c o m
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FASHION 4 6
Easter Show Stealer What Is Your Bridal Style?
PEOPLE 13
• Sen. Ita-Giwa Presents Coffee Table Book • Fiston Mwanza Mujila Wins Etisalat Prize for Literature
Editor’s Note
COVER STORY
The Floral Business
(JEFF LEATHAM)
Quotes... “I think we need to do some deep soul searching about what’s important in our lives and renew our spirit and our spiritual thinking, whether it’s through faith-based religion or just through loving nature or helping your fellow man”.
-Louie Schwartzberg
“Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you”. - Walter Winchell
When Tina Turner married her younger lover, Erwin Bach, in 2013, pictures that emerged showed a stunning 73-year old Tina wearing a green and black flamboyant ensemble, standing in her lawn with guests seated and surrounded by hundreds of flowers. Against the back-drop of cascading flowers and candle lit dinner tables, the entire scene was picturesque; breathtaking, the stuff that dreams are made of. The florist who created that breathtaking flower collage was in Nigeria a week ago where he held a Masterclass on the art and business of floristry. Jeff Leatham is a celebrity florist with a clientele base of Hollywood A-listers; from Oprah to Kim Kardashian and Eva Longoria, to mention a few. The convener of the Masterclass, wedding planner, Sade Awe, teamed up with other service providers in the wedding business for the ‘Leatham Experience’. In this interview with the team: Jeff Leatham, Sade Awe, Oghoho Asemota, Moji Akinkunmi, Yewande Rwang-Dung and Ata Ashiru, Latasha Ngwube learnt about the art and business of the mix that brought about the superlative event. See pp. 8-12. on herwedding day;Tina On our fashion pages, Yemisi Turner and husband,with Suleiman has selected some ‘Easter Oprah,Gayle King and Stealers’ - accessories that will set you Steadman apart as you set out for church or lunch to celebrate this Easter. This is our March Wedding Issue so, Jemi Ekunkunbor looks at the issue of Wedding Jitters. See pp. 14-15. Finally, for the bride-to-be who is still not sure of her wedding gown, read Yemisi Suleiman’s ‘Guide to Choosing a Wedding Gown’ on pp. 6-7. Enjoy your Easter! More importantly, reflect. Have a great week!
CHIBOK GIRLS: 500 days and counting.
R.
Remmy Diagbare @ Vanguardallure1
“Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them”.
- William Shakespeare
CREATIVE DIRECTION: LATASHA NGWUBE PHOTOGRAPHY: JIDE ALAKIJA
TEAM JEMI EKUNKUNBOR
lookposh@yahoo.co.uk
PAMELA ECHEMUNOR
pamela.echemunor @gmail.com
YEMISI SULEIMAN
suleimanyemisi@gmail.com
FATIMA GARBA
fatigarba36@yahoo.com
EDITOR REMMY DIAGBARE DEPUTY EDITOR JEMI EKUNKUNBOR ASST. EDITOR YEMISI SULEIMAN STYLE REPORTER PAMELA ECHEMUNOR CONTRIBUTORS PRINCESS KATE EMIKO BAMIYO ISELEMA EMINA JEROME CODJO-YAOVI ONIPEDE
CONT. EDITOR LATASHA NGWUBE COPY EDITOR DODOIYI WILLIAM-WEST CORRESPONDENTS FATIMA GARBA DAVINA AYODELE LAYOUT / DESIGN GREGORY OBI OLAYIWOLA AJAGBE PHOTO OSCAR OCHIOGU (08034746487)
Printed and published by Vanguard Media Ltd Vanguard Avenue Kirikiri Canal; P.M.B 1007 Apapa, Lagos. For advertisement / enquiries, call DEBBIE: 08039675880, Office Auxiliary: EBERE OKOH
FAS H I O N
Easter Show Stealers By Yemisi Suleiman It’s Easter once again and we are totally excited about the holidays and parties lined up for the day. From structured sleeveless dresses to flirty florals, whatever you choose to wear for your Easter outing, we have rounded up showstopping accessories for you to work into your ensemble, as the foundation to your Easter look.
Embelished clutch
Embellished clutch Make an entrance with an embellished clutch bag, they’re dramatic in style. You will look smart when you carry a little bag that glitters like jewellery.
Embelished crystal clutch
Satin purse
satin shoes Chain bracelete
Satin dolls An Enchanting evening calls for the smooth feel of the lustrous heels and purse.
Chain Gang
Chain bracelete
Chain bracelets are elegant and charming. Pair them with other bracelets or show them off solo. Either way, they prompt chain reaction.
Satin purse
Bow Ties
Classy timepieces
Bring out your feminine side with bow heels. These pretty shoes have flirtation written all over them and no one can resist the allure of an artfully tied bow.
bowtie shoes
Classy timepiece
bowtie shoes by Betsey Johnson
The long lean watch ideal for evening has been a classic for half a century. It has been revitalized with various eye-catching designs.
Bold sparkly cuff
Bold sparkly cuffs Bold sparkly cuff
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The night is going to be all about chunky, heavy bangles, for a complete style statement.
Black and gold Two colours have never looked so luxe next to each other.
Gold and black bracelete
FAS H I O N
What’s Your Bridal Style? By Yemisi Suleiman Choosing a wedding dress can look like a terrifying process sometimes. Firstly, there are different types or styles of wedding dresses out there that can be overwhelming. The question is, how do you chose a dress which is supposed to make you look (and feel) like the most beautiful you’ve ever felt or looked? It helps to know your body type and which wedding dress would best flatter your body shape. You could be pear shaped, or top heavy or even slender. The idea is to always opt for something you are comfortable with and something that your body fits into. It’s not about how expensive the material of the gown is. The most important thing is that it makes you feel at ease and you’re personally happy about your choice. Once you have figured out your body shape, then you can move on to choosing the style of your gown, whether it will be empire cut, ball gown, sheath, mermaid or A-line. Next thing you have to also consider is the neckline of your gown. Again, it is better to choose something you feel relaxed and comfortable in. To make your search easier, we have put together a handy guide, with different types of dresses, to help you in making the right choice, whiles taking your body shape into consideration.
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Glamorous Mermaid-Style A pair of chandelier earrings and a sparkly cuff would look stunning with a fitted mermaid dress, and strapless styles look amazing with a glitzy necklace. Choose dazzling hair pieces to finish the look, these especially suit dark hair because they will really catch the light and stand out.
For a Bateau Neckline Necklaces with a little length suit this retro style for a modern-day comeback. Go for strands of translucent crystals that drape over the neckline and allow skin and fabric to peek through. Don’t be afraid to layer several pieces. As for your earrings, choose a slight drop in a similar stone.
FA S H I ON
Strapless Neckline Bold multistrand necklaces, bejeweled bibs, and even classic pearls go exquisitely with this dress shape.
A-Line Wedding Dress
W O H TO . . . DO
A-line gown or one with long or short sleeves like, then a tiara is a great choice.
For a Sweetheart Neckline This collar beautifully mirrors the curves on a sweetheart bodice. A pair of crystal and pearl button earrings and necklace adds glitz.
For a One-Shoulder Neckline The diagonal sweep of this fashion-forward shape is a statement all its own and requires little embellishment. Forgo a necklace and slip on a pair of light-catching earrings and an oversize cuff. Wear your bracelet on the arm that’s bare
March 27, 2016 /
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REPORTAGE
The Floral Experience! Headlined by Rockstar Florist - JEFF LEATHAM
F
lowers have always been a part of our lives in some way. Wedding bouquets, birthdays, gestures of affection, horticultural clubs, Valentines’ day celebrations, leisure gardens, parks, condolence gifts, care packages…you name it but chances are you can’t escape it. As an integral part of nature’s landscape or the ‘piece de resistance’ as one could call them, they are also a billion dollar industry as jobs have and are being created daily from these natural masterpieces. Here in Nigeria, it is no longer uncommon to find people taking more than a passing interest in floral designs, arrangements and so on; as all over the world people have made it a point to master this craft so
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REPORTAGE
well that they have become celebrated experts. Jeff Leatham is one of those who have achieved superstar status from this craft with a celebrity clientele list that includes Oprah Winfrey, Eva Longoria, Elie Saab, Tina Turner, the Kardashians, Madonna and Kylie Minogue. Luxury brands such as Givenchy, Hermes and Burberry have him on speed dial. So you may ask yourself, “How did this man find his way to Nigeria?” The answer to that is a lady called Sade Awe, Founder of The Bridal Circle, whose area of specialization is planning and execution of luxury weddings worldwide. Her formidable vision and vast network of friends pooled resources to bring Jeff to Nigeria for the first Floral Masterclass of its kind. Vanguard Allure’s LATASHA NGWUBE spent a riveting whirlwind of a weekend with Jeff Leatham, Sade Awe, Oghogho Asemota, Moji Akinkumi, Ata Ashiru, Yewande Rwang-Dung and the rest of the wonderful team who worked tirelessly to present the wildly successfully Floral Masterclass, aptly tagged #TheJeffLeathamExperience. March 27, 2016 /
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of the Four Seasons luxury hotel group, is the epitome of luxury. The George V is renowned worldwide for it floristry, and its use of dramatic flower interior design and this is largely due to the hotel’s artistic director Jeff Leatham. Why flowers? Good question! In the beginning it wasn’t about flowers, it was a question of work, and then it turned into a question of respect and then into question of creativity and then a mission of mine to inspire. The Jeff Leatham experience it seems to be a phrase that follows you wherever you go. What exactly does this moniker mean to you in your own words? It’s called the Jeff Leatham experience because that’s what I hope it is. I think life now, in 2016, is so full of things that are expected. You are expected to go to work, expected to have a job, you are expected to do things. I think when you have an experience in life, it’s something you tend to remember a lot more- I hope. So when I get together with people and when I spread my kind of Leatham gospel so to speak, that it is called an experience. People leave feeling enthusiastic, inspired and hopeful.
JEFF LEATHAM The Rockstar Florist
Florists don’t normally enjoy international renown but Jeff Leatham is a star andHollywood favouritethat has created a niche for himself in the world of floristry and design. Born in Utah,he started off with a career as a model and after 3 years of working as amodel in Paris, he started working part-timeas a florist in 1996 at the Four Seasons hotel in BeverlyHills. 20 years later and Leatham is the artistic director of the Four Seasons worldwide. The Hotel George V, Paris, the crown jewel
How did you first meet Sade and what’s the relationship been like? I met Sade in Paris years ago at the George V like most of my most special relationships that happened at that hotel. I’d heard about this amazing group of people that she puts together. She is the most passionate woman for what she does, putting people together in the event business. For her it’s not about money, it’s about connections, it’s about communication, and it’s about putting great people together and inspiring people and that’s why we connected so much because we have the same values. What was your reaction when the idea of coming to Nigeria first surfaced? Sade spoke to me about it and I was very excited. She told me “don’t be scared, it’s okay, Nigeria is amazing”. I researched it and as time got closer I started researching a lot more. A lot of people have preconceived notions about anywhere that’s far away, so it’s been a pleasant surprise for me. It really feels very safe. It’s very cosmopolitan, very chic and all the people that I’ve met
MOJI AKINKUNMI
On a lighter note, how do you relax? My biggest luxury in life is sleep because I’m always on the move, always travelling. My mind is constantly creating and racing so if I have a moment to sleep then I indulge myself fully. So what is on your shopping list right now and what is your current designer obsession? Right now I have the new Marilyn Monroe collection from Dries Van Noten which is amazing because I love my girl, Marilyn. I love Tom Ford, Yves St Laurent, classic designs that never really go out of style. I think that’s important to me. In the world floral arrangements, is there a “Unicorn” bouquet or arrangement that still eludes you? I always wanted to float thousands and thousands and thousands of rose petals down the Seine in Paris. That’s probably one thing that I’ve always wanted to do that I’ve never done before. It’s kind of like a dream and I have to be very careful because everything I dream and everything I put out always comes true. For me it’s about creating thigs that really make people think.
Could you share briefly, your level of involvement in the Jeff Leatham experience? My involvement with ‘the experience’ was ensuring that all aspects of table designs tied in well with the floral experience. We were also responsible for the supply of all the tableware pieces at the event; from monogrammed napkins, ruby red glasses and statement gold crockery. We also had the pleasure of tablescaping for the grand dinner event. We were also proud to host all the press events at the store. It was, indeed, a great honour.
How did Angelika’s Homestore start? Angelika’s was born from my passion for events and table design. It all starts and ends with a beautiful table! So, whether it’s a dinner with friends and family or a wedding party, the most time is spent around a table, so a table-top store was inevitable for me since I was not going to be a full time event planner.
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What has been the highlight of this trip to Nigeria for you? The people, the connections, the love that I have felt while I was here that’s one thing I’m probably going away with.
What has been your biggest challenge in day-to-day operations of the business? The biggest challenge for us has been staffing. In our business, it is extremely important that the sales team share my passion and can communicate, effectively, knowledge of the products with our clientele.
Angelika’s, a home and gift store is a lifestyle hub featuring a wine shop and an array of exquisite and creative decor accents and tabletop pieces thoughtfully designed by some of the world’s most appreciated luxurious designers. Angelika’s offers a range of high-end dining, kitchen, home accessories and gifts as well as everyday pieces to complete your home
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The Masterclass you held was highly anticipated and celebrated. Personally, how would you rate the success of this event? For me, I was nervous because initially when Sade spoke to me about the event I thought there were literally going to be hundreds and hundreds of people! She told me people in Nigeria could sometimes be very last minute so I was pleasantly surprised by the turnout at the Masterclass. At the beginning of all my classes and my experiences people are always very quiet and reserved. That’s why I always start with dancing because it breaks the ice. It’s all about breaking the ice. People know that they are going to be there for a couple of hours, its creative fascination so to speak. I call them floral concerts because at the beginning of a concert you just sit there and then halfway into the concert it gets really amazing and you love it.
the expatriate community.
C.E.O ANGELIKA’S HOMESTORE
Who are your core clientele? My core clientele is the middle-class Nigerian; from Law School students to CEOs and, of course,
both at the masterclass and dinner reception have been really stylish. I also think there’s a lot of talent in this city.
In your own words, please complete this statement: Jeff Leatham is ... ... An extremely humble human being. I see no barriers when it comes to Jeff. This, obviously, is translated into the creativity of his work. A true rock star indeed!
...Ensuring all aspects of table design
SADE AWE
CEO Bridal Circle & Curator of the Jeff Leatham Floral Experience Lagos Spurred on by a mission to create a seamless partnership with clients and to provide superior and insightful service, Sade has revolutionized the luxury wedding industry. Her desire to provide only the most exquisite products from the most celebrated designers and artists within the luxury community has sent her to the far ends of the earth on a quest for the ultimate in wedding glamour. As a result, brides have only to search within the parameters of The Bridal Circle itself to encounter the best the world has to offer. With the creation of The Bridal Circle, Sade makes herself available to brides across the globe as a personal concierge, ensuring that the weddings of their dreams materialize before their very eyes. When she’s not networking with her elite wedding partners, blogging, poring over sumptuous photos, attending fashion shows or assisting brides with their opulent wedding plans, Sade loves to travel. Gorgeous hotels and resorts, couture boutiques, golfing and treatments in some of the world’s most luxuriant spas, are some of Sade’s greatest loves.
Your resume is impressively vast. How long has it taken you to get to this point where you are? Less than 5 years actually. My background is I.T and I was a consultant for over 15 years. I started out inspired by my younger sister who was getting married. She wanted to get married in Brussel and I couldn’t find a lot of things I was looking for so I started talking to people asking them what was missing in the online luxury brands, what would they like to see etc. I basically put on my analytical thinking cap and started talking to different luxury vendors to find the missing gaps in the market. In terms of how fast, I think it’s all about who you meet. I’m able to connect with people really well and I’m a woman of my word so integrity and reputation opens the door and people begin to trust you. If you do one thing right then people start to believe you are solid. What inspired the idea of this event? Jeff Leatham is a well renowned floral designer and
he’s brilliant so it was very easy. A lot of people had remarked on how amazing it would be to have Jeff in Nigeria. I thought to myself that Jeff would be the perfect fit for Nigeria because he is the type of person that is full of love and life and passion and it was very important to me that whoever I brought to Nigeria would embrace the culture. I did not want to bring someone who would have a high handed approach .I knew Jeff would be down to earth. What’s been your biggest surprise as regards the luxury market here in Nigeria? The unflinching support I had with my partners was amazing. Funmi, Ata, Yewande, Moji, Sarah, Oghogho… they just said what can we do, we want to be there. For me it’s important when I’m picking my partners that I work with people who see beyond my vision because it opens so many more doors. Unfortunately I also got to experience the not-so-sweet side of things as I found there people really almost
ATA ASHIRU
rooting for me to fail and it was really sad. If you were to change one perception or preconceived notion of potential Nigerian clients as regards luxury weddings what would that it be? In Nigeria there tends to be a lot of outside factors that is too many hands in the wedding planning process. So I would say if you are going to hire someone to plan a really luxurious wedding trust that the person you hired has your best interest at heart to do a good job and that they are truly professional at what they do! Can we look forward to you bringing more Master craftsmen of International repute back here to Nigeria soon? I hope so. I cannot say too much right now but watch this space!
friends and family, and people became interested in my designs and began to make requests. Then a few years ago for my thirtieth birthday, I created my invitations and people started calling to ask where I got them from and I told them how I designed and executed the whole thing myself. From that point, it took on a life of its own. I started designing and charging for it because I’ve always been creative.
C.E.O INKHEARTS STUDIO Ata Ashiru is the Creative Director of Inkhearts Studio, a full service design studio that caters to the discerning client looking to own custom stationery. They cater to the social/wedding industry as well as corporate clients who want more than cookie cutter designs. Their custom stationery creations are designed personally and uniquely for the client and sets the tone for their one of a kind events. Inspired by unique designs, fashion and a discovered love for specialty paper, Inkhearts was formally launched in January 2009. As cliche as it may sound, it really just started with creating unique designs for family and friends who wanted much more than the premanufactured invitations found at paperie stores. Armed with a Bachelors in International Business and a Masters’ degree in Business Administration, coupled with several years of working with an industry leader in risk management services and one of the Big 4 professional services firm, Ata is bringing her business skills to Inkhearts; creating the perfect marriage of creativity, good business
...Networking with elite wedding planners
From inception till now, have you had any form of formal training in calligraphy or graphic design? No formal training at all. I just pretty much knew what I wanted to do, had a focus, got myself on Google and learnt how to use all the necessary applications to design. In creating invitations and stationary for the Jeff Leatham experience, were you working with a particular theme or were you given free rein? I was given free rein but I also had to keep in mind that I was doing something for Jeff. I wanted to do something that he would appreciate. He worked with a lot of black acrylic vases in the Masterclass, the dinner menus were made of acrylic which were all inspired by Jeff. I also wanted to create something that was wow and that set the tone for the whole experience.
...inspired by unique design acumen and professionalism. She is happily married and a proud mother of 3. How did you start Inkhearts? I started out creating stationary and paper goods for
Where do you see your business going in the next 5 years? We have a full design studio in Ikoyi, where people can come and look at invitations and be inspired by my designs. In the next five years, I plan on incorporating, something like a “ready to order” line because we already have custom designs but something of good quality which would not as expensive as custom because that creates volume in sales at the end of the day. March 27, 2016 /
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REPORTAGE
YEWANDE RWANG-DUNG C.E.O SARAO EVENTS
Yewande’s SARAO is an events solutions company with an accumulated knowledge and passion for events. They place great emphasis on service and have a carefully selected team of knowledgeable, trustworthy, motivated people committed to good service. Their knowledgeable events specialists are there from the initiation stage right through to the end, to ensure that your desired event is strategically streamlined, technically executed and spectacularly breathtaking. Even within tight budgets and deadlines, they are known to always deliver, and deliver exceptionally. What is the distinction between event planning and event designing? Event designing is the look and feel of your venue and your event whereas event planning is starting from the beginning, deciding which caterer to use, which vendor to use and putting the whole event together. I don’t put the whole event together. I just make the place look beautiful. How was your expertise applied for the Jeff Leatham experience? What we did basically was design the whole place. I’m very blessed to have an amazing team. From the get-go, we were just in sync with the vision for the décor. Essentially it was just a group of us coming together, producing something really spectacular. People usually say that when there’s more than 2 women working in a space it could be somewhat chaotic, with so much estrogen charge in the air. Can you honestly say that has been the case with all of you women pulling your energy together to make this event a success? I am not going to lie. It hasn’t been a walk in the park. I think what really helped was that we all had the same focus, we were determined to make it a success and
...Producing something really spectacular we just all pulled in and made it work. And I think that’s the key thing .you are going to clash, have disagreements here and there ,but what’s the focus, stay on the ball , focus on what you are trying to do and just deliver! What needs to be done must be done. On a final note, do you have any advice for young event designers starting out in the business? What would you say is the most important piece of advice you can give them. For me when I started out, my focus wasn’t making money, my focus was building a brand and I would take on jobs often times spending the entire allocation, my profits included just to create something really good and it worked for me. It helped me build my reputation and my brand so I would say if you love designing, just design forget about money and eventually it would start paying off.
How did you come about such a unique name as Aralia By Nature? Aralia is the name of a plant. It’s a plant that has large leaves and I just loved the form of the plant. So I added “by nature” to it and that’s how I came about the name. As a florist yourself, what was it like working alongside Jeff on this project? Working alongside Jeff on this project was an eye opening, humbling, empowering and amazing experience. I could go on. I found working alongside him almost like a dream. Once I got over that, I watched and learnt so much from his technique. Apart from just working with flowers, Jeff, as a person, also made me realize one thing that I have always stood for: he made me know for sure that I am on the right path which is humility. Jeff is like the number one florist in the world right now and he just embraced me and my team. What I realized is that no matter how successful you are, you just have to have your feet on the ground. He is an established man, no doubt, and he has no airs about him at all. For me, that’s one of the most important things I’m going to take away from meeting him. Can you give us a little insight as to the kind of support ABN brought to the table? The support that ABN brought to the table at this event was, basically, supplying every single flower that Jeff used for his Masterclass and assisting with putting small, medium and large floral arrangements wherever they were needed like for interviews, coffee tables and the main dinner to honour Jeff. We brought in all the flowers for the event and we actually did the arrangement of all the tables at the venue that night.
...Happy to teach and give advice
OGHOGHO ASEMOTA C.E.O., ARALIA BY NATURE
Aralia By Nature is a floral studio based in Lagos, Nigeria, founded by Oghogho on the principle of celebrating the beauty of nature. Her process is based on emotion, focusing on telling the story of the beauty, mystery and rejuvenating qualities of nature. Since its birth in 2009, Aralia By Nature has become the maven of the Nigerian floral industry; the highly creative floral designer, Oghogho, has amassed an evocative portfolio of floral décor, tablescaping and landscaping projects. Her style could be described as rustic, fashion forward and professional.
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If you could add anything to the roaring success of this experience, what would it be? What I would like to add to the roaring success of this event is very simple: we need to support each other more in the industry, especially women. Most times, we are our own worst enemies. I also feel that we should stop being so scared of supporting other successful people. The market is big; it’s huge and massive. It’s big enough for everybody. One person’s success doesn’t mean that the next person is less successful. If we all come together, we would be able to build beautiful and amazing to-die-for events. More collaboration is really necessary. We should be able to work together and not be afraid of each other. That’s why when people walk through my door talking to me about all things florist, I’m happy to teach and give them advice. Jeff has also made me realize that apart from being a florist, I would love to teach people more about floral arrangements. CREATIVE DIRECTION: LATASHA NGWUBE PHOTOGRAPHY: JIDE ALAKIJA Cover Outfits (for all except Jeff) - CAMILLA courtesy of Designers Club Lagos LOCATION - Angelika’s Home Store STYLING: Latasha Ngwube/Chiso Ebi MAKE-UP: Modupe Onanuga for Makeup by Mogizzie Makeup by Ekene Jewellery- Kareema Mak CREATIVE ASSISTANT/INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPTION - ANNE OKWUZI
PEO PL E
“ONE PARTY AT A TIME!”
:08034746487 | 08039675880
Sen. Ita-Giwa Presents Coffee Table Book By - Fatima Garba
Remmy diagbare & florence ita-giwa
florence ita-giwa
Fred Ojei
Rose Stephens
hrh erelu abiola
Ndidi Obioha
Grace Egbagbe
Bose Clark
ngozi eze
Evlyn Obioha
bolu akin olugbade
Princess Onilere
joseph & adaeze yobo
Pics by - Godwin Onyemaechi
Mr. Seye Kehinde, publisher of ‘City People’ magazine, last weekend, hosted Senator Florence Ita-Giwa and friends to a dinner which held at the Oriental Hotel, Victoria Island, Lagos. The event was to celebrate the senator’s doctorate degree from the University of Calabar and the formal presentation of a coffee table book on her life and style titled ‘At a Good Place’, written by Editor of Allure Vanguard, Mrs. Remmy Diagbare. The 210-page book chronicles her style evolution from her early years to her giant strides in politics and her activism on behalf of the Bakassi people. In her speech, Sen. Ita-Giwa said that she plans to publish two more books: her memoirs and a book on legislative matters. In an emotion laden-voice, she spoke about the pains and struggles of the Bakassi people and how it is her lifelong ambition to see the people properly resettled. “I will continue the struggle till the end,” she declared. On her style, she said that she will never stop being fashionable. “I don’t understand why women feel that once they turn 60, they should stop being trendy. I will always look trendy and will wear heels even when I am 80.” Author of the book, Mrs. Diagbare, said that the book which took about two months to finish was only a tip of the essence of the amiable senator. “There are so many sides to the senator. This is just an easy read. A book you can flip through while waiting for someone.” Although the senator would not sell the book and so would not put a price to it, donations for the books, which are already coming in, would be given to Bakassi Foundation. Here are pictures from the event.
Fiston Mwanza Mujila Wins Etisalat Prize for Literature By - Oscar Ochiogu
Fiston Mwanza Mujila from the Democratic Republic of Congo, has emerged winner of the 2015 Etisalat Prize for Literature after months of suspense and rigorous judging sessions. Mujila beat two other South African authors; Penny Busetto – The Story of Anna P as told by herself and What will People Say by Rehana Rossouw. A sum of £15,000 was awarded to Mujila as his prize with his debut novel, entitled Tram 83. The award ceremony took place last weekend in Lagos with a panel of judges, led by Professor Ato Quayson. As the prize winner, Mujila, will attend the Etisalat Fellowship at the University of East Anglia under the mentorship of Giles Foden. Chief Executive Officer Etisalat Nigeria, Matthew Wilsher in his remarks, thanked all those who entered the Prize adding that Etisalat is proud to be associated with what the three shortlisted authors have done.
Francesco Angelone, Molara Woods, Fiston Mwanza Mujila, Zukiswa Wanner, Prof. Ato Quayson & Matthew Willsher
Modupe Thani
Elvis Daniel & Gerald Osugo
Gbemi Sasore
Olof Valdimas Dottir & Temi Conde
March 27, 2016 /
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WEDDING JITTERS:
A Bride’s Nightmare
● If you are uncertain about the choice of your partner, you may want to double check with yourself and with others who know him quite well. Be honest with yourself, Marriage is for a lifetime or at least, so we hope.
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/ March 27, 2016
HOW TO DEAL WITH THE ANXIETY ● First, identify the source of anxiety. This way, you are already half way through getting it solved.
By - Jemi Ekunkunbor t is the dream of every girl to be married. The wedding day is every girl’s ultimate dream come true. Many single girls already have their big day pictured out; something akin to a fairy tale, a Disney kind of thing: to walk down the aisle in the arms of her prince charming, adorning the most beautiful dress sculpt to her body shape, with picture perfect make up, escorted by a glamorous wedding train; bridesmaids and groomsmen alike. This is the dream, a perfect wedding: then, the couple can live happily ever after. But as we know, perfection is not a common thing with man. Even where there is money to execute some of these things, one cannot but worry whether there won’t be hitches in the process. It is this fear of the unknown that causes worry and anxiety for the couple especially, the bride on whose soft shoulders most of the planning rests. Whether it is a marriage conducted 30 years ago or one done yesterday, all couples experience one form of anxiety or the other. Marriage is a major commitment both emotionally and financially. Taking decisions on some of the things to do, is enough stress for anyone. Some anxiety manifests itself even on the wedding day. But research shows that women seem to be taking the brunt in jitters and panic attacks. Although it is natural to experience a bit of anxiety, too much of it will not make you enjoy the wedding. Over two decades ago as an undergraduate, I was mandated by an older cousin to stand in for her as chief brides maid at her friend’s wedding. She had found out too late that she won’t be around for the wedding date. It was a low budget wedding, scheduled for one of the big churches in Edo State at the time. Considering where it was taking place, I had gone to get the perfect outfit befitting of a chief bridesmaid. If I knew what I knew afterwards, I wouldn’t have bothered. Every thing about the wedding smelt cheap, almost everything was hired and that includeds the wedding gown! It was enough to give a bride a heart attack. But the real anxiety came for the bride when two hours after the scheduled time, the groom was no where to be found. It was pre GSM days. There was no means to track the groom. The bride, almost crippled by worry, had concluded that a close friend of the groom must have advised him not to come. In her anger and worry, she had voiced what she would do to that man if her fiance does not show up. Guests were already leaving when almost at 1pm, the groom drove in. As we learnt later, because of their low budget, he did not delegate duties to people. He had left home early that wedding day to go book for drinks. It was environmental sanitation day. Unfortunately for him, he was arrested by sanitation officials. It took a while to explain to them that it was his wedding day. Pray, if you were in this bride’s shoes, won’t you be nervous, anxious and worried sick? Aijay Ndu was a bride 17 years ago. According to her, “My greatest worry was whether my fiance at the time may change his mind and not turn up. Suddenly, I was not sure of myself anymore. I began to worry whether I am not doing the wrong thing by marrying him. You have all kinds of worries. I also feared that we may run out of cash to do all the things that we needed to do”.
experience of others, cheating, abusive or absent spouse. With the jitters taking hold of the bride, she must find ways to help herself overcome these anxieties. And if your anxiety stems from any of the causes listed above, here is the how as recommended by Dr. Gbonju Abiri.
● In the case of insufficient funds, make a budget, and stick by it. Cut your coat according to your dress. Remember that life exists after an elaborate wedding especially if you go borrowing. ● If it is non-consenting parents, find out why they are bent on refusing you to marry your choice. ● Unsettled ex(es) and love affairs can cause a lot of anxiety, especially if they don’t want to face the reality that you have moved on, or if you are still testing the waters with them. Make up your mind on what you want. You may need to involve your spouse, letting them know what exactly is going on, so that if your ex threatens blackmail, the worst is that they’d tell your spouse who already knows anyway.
For Annie Holloway, her anxiety was of a different dimension. Her fiancee according to her was someone who always looked up to others to meet his needs and he had the habit of name dropping who and who had promised to do xyx for him. “So as the wedding day approached, it became obvious to me that he didn’t really have anything to plan around. All his plans were based on expected gifts from people. I became really worried that we would live married life, based on what he would beg from people”. Nkechi Ajibade, could have testified that her wedding plans were hitch free, until a week before the wedding when she had to take her wedding gown to church for inspection according to the dictates of her church denomination. Her elegant wedding dress with plunging neckline, failed the test! “With less than a week to go and with less than N25,000 left in my account, I had no idea where I was going to get another gown. I found myself crying and begging one designer to accept what I had and fix me another dress to wear. That experience totally distabilized me”. Anxiety according Dr. Gbonju Abiri, Senior Registrar, Federal Neuropsychiatric Hospital, Yaba, “is a normal emotion occurring in everyone at some point in time”. However, she says it is considered as a disorder “when the signs and symptoms felt are out of proportion to the danger or threat ahead or when the symptoms persist even after the threat has disappeared”. She listed these signs as some symptoms of wedding anxiety. “Butterflies in your tummy, goose bumps on your skin, palpitations in your heart, increasing deep breaths, feeling faint, and racing thoughts through your mind” These symptoms according to her could stem from uncertainty about your choice of a partner, insufficient funds to execute the wedding, negative vibes from parents and/or siblings who may not give consent and unsettled ex(es) or other love relationships yet to be severed. Other causes she added include, wedding plans and its stress, the uncertainty of marriage, especially from previous
● Wedding plans and the stress. A wedding is a big event and yes it’s a big deal. It also comes with its attendant stress that you can actually positively assess and face. You can make it fun if you make a list, assign tasks to take the stress off yourself and get a lot of rest in between tasks. Inquire about how others have managed the anxiety associated with the wedding. Be positive about the wedding and remind yourself, ‘It will go well’. ● The uncertainty of marriage as well the experience of others may actually weigh you down, especially if you have been listening to the negative vibes from failed marriages or people who have troubles with their marriages. While marriage, like life, is not a bed of roses, quite a number of people have marriages that are enjoyed and have stood the test of time, because the partners have mutual goals, understand each other and settle discord when it occurs amicably. Talk with such people. ● Be reasonable with yourself. If there are danger signs you already spot which are causing you anxiety, and you can’t seem to have them solved, such as an abusive spouse, you may want to have a rethink about the union. Follow your heart, but think with your head. ● Talk to someone you love, respect and whose opinion you value about your fears. Talking about the problem may actually help ease your anxiety. ● Trust in God. If you do believe in God, then you can let him have all your worries. Remember what they say, why worry, when you can pray.
Dr. Gbonju Abiri, senior Registrar, Federal Neuropsychiatric Hospital, Yaba