The University Observer: Volume XVI, Issue 2 by The University Observer

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STUDENTS BLAST FIVE PAST AWFUL KILDARE

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MICHEÁL MARTIN VS JOE HIGGINS P8 & 9

Observer Digest NEWS Orientation chaos looms for 2010 The late start of the 2010 Leaving Cert examinations could cause chaos for UCD’s orientation P3

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FEATURES Breaking the Taboo A veteran porn actress talks about life, love, God, and wall-to-wall sex P15

Societies solicited for details by Crunch BRIDGET FITZSIMONS The auditors of some of UCD’s largest student societies have reported that agents representing the Crunch Fitness gym attempted to solicit copies of their members’ contact details during this year’s Freshers’ Week. The gym, which operates on the top floor of the UCD Sports Centre, offered some auditors two free gym memberships in exchange for copies of their membership lists, containing personal information – such as the name, phone number, student number and email address – of every member of the society. Several auditors of high profile societies have told The University Observer they were approached by the on-campus leisure centre staff in the Freshers’ Marquee during Freshers’ Week. Letters detailing the offer were left at the sign-up desks of some societies, while Crunch Fitness representatives actively approached some auditors at their societies’ stands. One auditor said they questioned the Crunch Fitness representative about the legality of the offer, but was told that there would be no data protection implications to the deal. Continued on P2 >>

29th September 2009 ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY... 1979: Pope John Paul II became the first pope in history to set foot on Irish soil

WORLD EXCLUSIVE otwo’s Conor Barry talks to the makers of Disney Pixar’s Up

INSIDE

Observer

29th September 2009

Record memberships for the biggest societies don’t tell the whole story of UCD’s waning social life P5

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The University niversity

VOLUME XVI ISSUE 2

ANALYSIS Keeping it Fresh

SUPPLEMENT

NE QUID FALSE DICERE AUDEAT NE QUID VERI NON AUDEAT

IRELAND’S AWARD-WINNING STUDENT NEWSPAPER

Levy dispute puts new Student Centre in doubt GAVAN REILLY

legal document has been sent to the University on behalf of the Students’ Union over concerns that students have been overcharged for this year’s student centre levy. Last year’s charge of €150 was increased this year to €157.50 per student, which is a jump of five per cent. However the levy, which is index linked, should be in line with current inflation levels. During the past twelve months to August inflation has been running at just under minus six per cent. This means that rather than increasing, the student centre levy should have been reduced in line with the country’s economic deflation. Students’ Union President, Gary Redmond, confirmed to The University Observer that the Union’s legal team had sent a four-page document outlining the Union’s concerns with the inflated levy, but declined to offer any further comment. A spokesperson for UCD confirmed that the University authorities had received correspondence from the Students’ Union querying the extra €7.50 charged to each student, adding that the Bursar would be meeting with Union representatives later this week to discuss the subject. It is believed that legal action may be taken on the matter should the dispute remain unresolved. Work on the site of the extension

UL get away from UCD in their friendly Ultimate Frisbee match last Saturday. Photo: Killian Woods has meanwhile ground to a halt, with a contractor yet to be appointed to oversee the physical construction of the extended complex. The University spokesperson explained that the “Student Centre project is divided into two parts. The enabling contract for drainage, sewerage, and connections […] is now complete. Details of the main contract will be released shortly and work should commence in October.”

The project is also believed to be running approximately €5m under budget. Work on the student centre extension was originally supposed to be completed by December 2009. The levy was initially introduced in 1998 following a referendum of the student body to approve the construction of the current Student Centre building, and was originally set at IR£30, rising to IR£50 within two years. Plans for a

major extension to the building were approved at a further referendum in April 2006, with the levy rising accordingly from €63.50 to €150 over three years to fund the project. The new development, formally known as the UCD Student Learning, Leisure and Sports Complex, is planned to include a cinema, debating space, purpose-built drama theatres, and a 50m swimming pool.

SIPTU vote in favour of strike action BRIDGET FITZSIMONS UCD’s branch of SIPTU has voted in favour of industrial strike action in the row over compulsory redundancies. The ballot, which was passed by a margin of 88 per cent to 12 per cent, is in protest against UCD’s proposal to introduce compulsory redundancies for staff in the university. Scheduling of the strike action is yet to be finalised and Senior Lecturer in the UCD School of Sociology and President of SIPTU’s Education division, Dr Kieran Allen, said the timing of such action “depends on management.” Dr Allen stated that the action is a result of “a threat from management to change a statute without consulting us.” UCD have decided to look into the possibility of compulsory redundancies as a cost cutting measure. The Irish Business

and Employers Confederation (IBEC), of which UCD is a member, has called for compulsory redundancies in the public sector. Dr Allen, however, maintains that job losses are unnecessary, telling The University Observer, “we don’t accept their argument. They have an argument that there are researchers who are being kept on and there’s no work for them.” He continued that “those researchers have been employed for seven or eight years here, and under the terms of the Fixed Term Workers Act, they are entitled to a contract of definite duration.” He also felt that “because people have won their legal rights, it is [UCD] responding with compulsory redundancies.” In a circular email sent last week to all SIPTU members within UCD and seen by The University Observer, Dr Allen wrote: “It is perfectly clear that a

section of management are trying to use the recession and the crisis of funding in the University, which they created, to use ‘shock doctrine’ tactics and change working conditions”, and that he doesn’t believe the redundancies will be confined to researchers. SIPTU representatives have met with University officials in an effort to end the dispute, but Dr Allen stated that, “the ball is now back in management’s court,” and that “we’ve been available to meet management since August, but they

haven’t gotten back to us.” The University Observer had not received a response from the University on the matter at the time of going to print.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

NEWS CONTINUED FROM P1

Societies solicited for details by Crunch

news@universityobserver.ie

L&H remain biggest UCD Society

A number of other auditors said they had been warned of Crunch Fitness’s activity by the Freshers’ Week security staff, and reported that the staff had removed details of the Crunch Fitness offer from the stands of societies before they had been seen by the societies’ officers. A number of sports clubs were also approached over the duration of the week. A spokesperson for Crunch Fitness declined to comment on the matter.

Students enjoy Freshers’ Week 2009 Photos: Katie-Ann McDonagh SELVA UNAL

his year’s Freshers’ Week was well attended by students, with the Literary & Historical Society emerging once again as UCD’s biggest student society. 4,831 people joined the society this year, a record membership level for any campus society at this point of the year. L&H Auditor, Conor McAndrew, attributed the society’s popularity to the fact that the L&H is “a cross-faculty society… we get members from all over campus; we have a strong calendar of

Calculation error affects Arts GPAs MATT GREGG Reports have emerged that an administrative error resulted in a number of Arts graduates from last year being awarded an incorrect Grade Point Average (GPA). The University Observer understands that the error affected students who started their undergraduate course in 2005, but who sat repeat exams in their second and/or third years. This was due to the unique grading system in place during the first year of UCD’s Horizons programme, which was launched in 2005. Problems arose in 2006 when students were informed that their GPA would be split evenly between second and third years. Following numerous complaints from both students and student representatives regarding how late students were informed of the change, academic authorities amended the degree weighting. Second year results were reduced to 30 per cent of students’ final GPA, with third year results making up the remaining 70 per cent. However, in subsequent years, the exam results from both second and third year have been awarded equal weighting in determining a student’s final GPA. Initially, Arts students who started in 2005 and graduated this year having sat repeats, did not have their GPA calculated as agreed. Their GPA was originally split evenly between second and third year instead of the original 30/70 weighting. The mistake was subsequently corrected. One student affected by the miscalculation explained, “I was concerned when I saw that the original GPA given was not as high as expected […] UCD, to their credit, did correct my grade a

number of weeks later, but this mistake was easily preventable.” “This had the potential to upset and worry students, especially those depending on [their final degree grade] to get a postgraduate course,” the former student continued. “Thankfully, despite the mistaken grade I was given I was still accepted to my chosen postgraduate course, but others may not have.” An official statement from the University stated that there had been “no general issue in relation to final year grades this year”, but that if a student wished to query their final grade they should “follow the normal appeals procedure.”

“This had the potential to upset and worry students, especially those depending on [their final degree grade] to get a postgraduate course,” the former student continued. “Thankfully, despite the mistaken grade I was given I was still accepted to my chosen postgraduate course, but others may not have.”

debates and guests so we had a lot of returning students.” Asked if the Society’s roster of guests for the year was a significant contributor, McAndrew also said the L&H’s age – the society is now in its 155th session – “makes us sound interesting; if we’ve succeeded to run the thing for 155 years.” The Law Society broke their own membership records this year also, with 4,120 new members. Other large societies also fared well during Freshers’ Week; Dramsoc now have 1,300 members and expect more to join over the coming weeks. Special interest societies are well

represented this year. The International Student Society has 398 members, while the LGBT Society has over 300 sign-ups, a reported increase from previous years. Subject-based societies also did well, with MathSoc signing up 230 members. The newly formed Humanist Society had 160 people join. Elsewhere, at the UCD Sports Expo held concurrently in the Sports Centre, UCD’s sports clubs also declared themselves largely happy with their new membership levels. The Trampoline Club attracted 250 members over the week, while Badminton claimed 220 sign-ups. Swimming & Water Polo also retained

their consistent popularity, with 163 members. Martial Arts proved popular with Tae Kwon Do signing up 162 members and Ninjitsu 110. In addition, the new Capoeira club signed up 54 members. Womens’ sports clubs in particular proved popular on campus this year. Ladies Hockey has 90 members, and Women’s Soccer 85. Ladies Rugby boasted 60 new members, on top of 20 returning members from last year. Students will have a second chance to join clubs and societies on Refreshers’ Day, which takes place in the second week of the second semester.

Student STI screening relocates to Belfield

BRIDGET FITZSIMONS UCD Students’ Union has moved its subsidised STI screening clinic on campus to the Student Health Centre. The clinic previously operated out of the private surgery of Dr Ian O’Grady in Donnybrook. Dr O’Grady is a former member of the Student Health Centre’s medical staff. SU President, Gary Redmond, told The University Observer that he was “absolutely delighted” with the move, explaining that the relocation comes as a result of improved funding to the Health Centre following the introduction of fees to the service earlier this month. He continued that “this year we’ve been able to move [the STI

screening service] into the medical centre as part of the reorganisation within the medical centre, and it’s one of the new services that’ll be getting provided upstairs.” The clinic will be run by a doctor specialising in sexual health, who started working in the Student Health Centre last year. Redmond credited the move as a project of SU Welfare Officer, Scott Ahearn, and commended him for his work on it. He said that the move was “something that Scott has worked particularly hard on over the summer”, and also stated that the SU have “always wanted to move it to campus,” citing “funding shortages” when asked why the move had not happened sooner. Redmond has indicated that the

relocation of the STI clinic will not be the last service to be introduced by the Students’ Union for the Student Health Centre, saying that it is “the first of many that will be rolled out.” Redmond also confirmed that the contraceptive clinic has returned to the Student Health Centre, having being withdrawn in the second semester of last year. The STI screening service was started in the 2006/07 academic year, and costs €40 to students, with the SU subsiding the service by fifty per cent. The clinic will operate on Wednesday mornings, and appointments can be made for both the STI clinic and contraceptive clinic by visiting the Student Health Centre or calling (01) 716 3133.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

3 NEWS

news@universityobserver.ie

Arts & Engineering entry overhauled AMY BRACKEN

ncoming students to arts may have to choose their core subjects before applying to the CAO from next year

Musical Society committee members in Freshers’ Week Photo: Catriona Laverty

Musical Society formed for new academic year BRIDGET FITZSIMONS The newly formed UCD Musical Society signed up 510 members during its first Freshers’ Week. The society, which ran a number of performances during Freshers’ Week, plans to work in conjunction with the UCD Community Musical, as well as putting on its own productions. Musical Society Auditor, Jason Masterson, is hopeful about the inaugural year of the society, reporting “we’ve had a lot of interest.” The society’s debut production, The Wedding Singer, is planned to run in the Astra Hall late this semester. Auditions took place last week, with Masterson explaining that the society had “over a hundred people audition for our first show”. He admitted that “it’s going to be a really eighties year”, as the UCD Com-

munity Musical will be a production of Footloose, a choice he explained by expressing that the Community Musical and Musical Society had tried “to pick something that has more mass appeal”. While Masterson admits that ticket sales for last year’s production Guys and Dolls did not meet those of the previous year’s West Side Story, he is confident that the more contemporary musicals will attract a wider audience this year. He is also hoping that staff will become more involved in the projects. According to Masterson, the existence of a distinct Musical Society is necessary, as “Dramsoc produce so many shows that they have limited capacity to do musicals […] you’d have three or four different aspects that a play wouldn’t have.” Having worked on the Dramsoc production of Rent last year, Masterson

gauged an interest in musicals and decided that a Musical Society was necessary. He and his committee decided to “do it as itself, to see if it has the interest, to see if it has the excitement and to put a structure on it.” Despite being affiliated with it, the Musical Society will receive no funding from the UCD Community Musical. The society instead receive sponsorship from Student Travelcard, but will not receive a grant for their first year, as per usual Society Council rules. Masterson says that he and his committee will be “working very closely with the steering committee” but that “they’ll still be in charge of the Community Musical”. The Wedding Singer is scheduled to run in November, while Footloose will show in February in O’Reilly Hall.

on. A similar method to the procedures for entry to Trinity College’s two-subject moderatorship will be introduced for the 2010-2011 academic year. Students will now have a choice of indicating a preference for their major when applying to the CAO, thus avoiding disappointment when it comes to module registration. A University spokesman explained that new incoming students “will be given the option to pre-register two subject preferences. These students will then be automatically allocated modules in these subjects at registration and will therefore be guaranteed places in those classes. “Students won’t have to pre-register but if they wish to take high-demand subjects, they may find the classes are full when they go to register. The new system won’t affect existing students.” In Engineering, entry applicants will now enter through a singular omnibus programme, and specialise in an engineering branch during their degree programme. The current options to enter specialised engineering programmes directly from the CAO will be rescinded.

The spokesman explained “Engineering is returning to omnibus entry next year because the pattern of student interest over the past number of years indicates that students prefer to specialise at a later stage in their engineering degree. By coming in through [the single course code] DN077, students get a comprehensive introduction to the fundamentals of engineering before deciding which discipline to follow later in their degrees.” Students’ Union Education Officer, Donnacha Ó Súilleabháin, explained to The University Observer that “the current programme planning process is looking at simplifying entry routes to UCD courses, so that incoming students have a clearer understanding of what they’re studying, what options are open to them, and what pathways they can take through their degree programme.” Ó Súilleabháin was also keen to defend the deferral of reformed entry to other programmes, some of which were originally intended for implementation in time for this year’s entry. He said that “programme planning is ongoing, and it is likely that we will see even more revisions for entry 2011.” He also felt that that the priority is “quality, and not deadlines. The university should take its time revising entry routes and processes, and ensure that all systems are working before implementing changes.”

Students enjoy orientation week. Photo: Rob Lowney

Staff pressure forces Orientation ‘Bike to Work’ U-turn chaos looms JACK HORGAN-JONES & ROBERT UPTON

University authorities have moved to implement the government-sponsored ‘Bike to Work’ scheme, following an online staff petition. Pressure from staff dissenting at an earlier decision not to introduce the scheme culminated in an online petition with over 500 names collected and sent to Dr Hugh Brady’s office last week. Speaking with The University Observer in the days before the announcement, some prominent academics had criticised the college authorities for failing to implement the scheme. Professor John McCafferty, Director of the Micheál Ó Cléirigh Institute in UCD’s School of History & Archives, outlined the steps staff had taken in their efforts to have the scheme introduced

since it began on January 1st this year. “Repeated requests to Human Resources first of all evoked no response, but then in March, HR asked a group of people who cycle to come in and talk about whether we would have the bike scheme or not.” It was expected from this meeting that the scheme would be implemented in UCD, however further communication from the HR department stated that “due to the pressure of other work” they would not be introducing the ‘Bike to Work’ initiative. Professor Danielle Clarke of the School of English, Drama & Film also commented on the failure of the university to implement the scheme. “It seems to me that the more people who cycle in and out of UCD, the better life will be for everybody. There are multiple advantages: it’s cheap, you’re never late, and it stops you getting fat! […] I just don’t

understand why it wasn’t implemented. Given the fact that we are a ‘green’ campus and the issues surrounding parking and traffic management on campus, it just seems illogical not to have implemented it.” The ‘Bike to Work’ scheme was first introduced by the Green Party in the 2009 budget, and is designed to encourage more people to cycle to work. The scheme offers a tax-free incentive on new bikes and accessories to a maximum of €1,000 per employee over a five year period. The employer pays for the bike, which is then repaid by the employee by salary deductions. The company does not have to notify the government that it is availing of the scheme, nor does it need to fill out any government forms. There are at least five service providers who act as a single point of contact for both employers and employees interested in the incentive.

2007, and a total increase of 30 per cent between 2003 and 2008 -Every member of staff can avail of the scheme as long as they are directly employed by the university -The bicycle must be the primary mode of transport used by the employee for qualifying journeys. This means that all or part (e.g. between home and train sta-

tion) of a journey between the employee’s or director’s home and normal place of work, or between his or her normal place of work and another place of work, must be made on the bicycle -Bikes can be bought from anywhere as long as it is paid for by the employer. Only the first €1,000 of the expenditure is exempted from tax.

Bike to Work: The facts -Although there are no official figures to date, uptake of the scheme seems slow. An industry survey taken last month shows that just one per cent of the workforce has availed of the scheme -Recent figures released by Dublin City Council reveal the number of cyclists is steadily climbing, with eight per cent more on the road last year compared to

for 2010 CATRIONA LAVERTY Serious scheduling conflicts have arisen relating to next year’s Orientation Week. A calendar anomaly means that all incoming first years will only find out they have a place in UCD on the first day of Orientation. The 2010 Orientation Week will conflict with the publication of the first round of the CAO offers, due to the late occurrance of the 2010 June Bank Holiday. Next year’s holiday will take place on 7th June, which means that the Leaving Cert cannot begin until the following Wednesday, 9th June. The calendar issues will then have the knock-on effect of pushing the Leaving Cert results – and consequently the CAO first round offers – back by one week. As the current academic schedule for next year stands, this means that CAO offers will be released on the first day of Orientation Week. University representatives met last week to try and resolve the scheduling issues. One of the suggestions considered was to move the start of term, and thus Orientation week, back by one week. This

would, however, cause difficulty with the Christmas exam period: exams are scheduled to end on 17th December next year; should the term be pushed back by one week, exams would then not end until Christmas Eve. Further suggestions were to hold some examinations on Sundays during the Christmas exam period, but the University is bound not to hold exams on Sundays, and has previously pledged that no student shall sit more than three exams in two days, a pledge only honoured by the inclusion of a Sunday moratorium. It is understood that UCD is the only university affected by the late offers next year, as other universities hold exams in the first weeks of January rather than December examinations. The scheduling issues will also affect the allocation of campus residence places to first year students. At present, students can only apply for places in campus accommodation three days after they accept their CAO offer. This would mean that incoming first year students could only apply for campus accommodation two working days before the beginning of term, and would be unlikely to have been allocated a place before the first day of lectures.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

NEWS

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SU mandated to campaign for Yes vote to Lisbon BRIDGET FITZSIMONS

CD Students’ Union is supporting a Yes vote in this Friday’s referendum on the ratification of the Lisbon Treaty, after being mandated to do so by its Executive. SU President Gary Redmond told The University Observer that the pro-Lisbon mandate came to fruition after the Union Executive heard a presentation from a member of pro-Lisbon youth lobby group, Generation Yes. The member was invited to speak at the request of SU Executive. The mandate originally proposed that the SU affiliate with the group, but Redmond “first asked the Union Executive if the SU wanted to take a stance on the Lisbon Treaty referendum, rather than first affiliating with a group.” Following a discussion on this matter, Redmond “further suggested that the SU does not af-

filiate with any outside group, and that the motioned be amended, to change the term ‘affiliate’ to the term ‘support’.” The amended motion was passed unanimously by SU Executive.

It is not unusual for the SU to take stances on national and international issues Redmond went on to say “it is not unusual for the SU to take stances on national and international issues.” He added that “in the past, the SU has taken stances regarding abortion, workers’ rights, bin taxes, the Rossport pipeline, the Gaza strip, Kosovo, immigration, arrests of individuals, drugs, etc.” Outside of term time, the Union Executive acts in lieu of the Union Council in setting day-to-day policy for the Students’ Union and mandating the Union’s officers to

act in what it deems the best interests of the student body. While Council has the power to overturn any decision made by the Union Executive, a Council meeting two weeks ago did not reach quorum, and Council has since been dissolved in advance of this week’s class rep elections. The Union Executive is comprised of the Union’s five sabbatical officers, ten elected Programme Officers – who represent the interests of students in individual schools – and a number of Executive Officers representing individual briefs such as the Environment and the Irish Language. The Students’ Union will hold a talk this week on the Lisbon Treaty and its benefits for students, in partnership with the Generation Yes group. Voting in the referendum on ratifying the Lisbon Treaty takes place nationwide this Friday, 2nd October. Read the results of The University Observer’s exclusive Lisbon Treaty poll on page 8.

STUDENT ASSISTANCE FUND

2009-2010

Applications are now being accepted for the Student Assistance Fund 2009-2010. This scheme is funded by the Department of Education and Science with assistance from the European Social Fund. It is means tested and funding will be targeted at those students who are in most financial need. Students who are currently reg-

istered at UCD to a course of at least one year are eligible to apply. Please note that students who have completed a degree, and are registered for a second degree at the same level, (e.g. students undertaking a 2nd Bachelor, Masters or PhD degree ) are not eligible to apply.

Closing Date

Friday 23rd October 2009, at 12.00 noon. Application forms are available to download from www.ucd.ie/studentadvisers. For further information, contact your Student Adviser. All applications must be submitted to Ann O’Hanlon, Student Adviser, School of Computer Science and Informatics, Room A.1.16, Computer Science Building, Belfield. Only fully completed forms, together with relevant supporting documentation will be considered. No late applications

will be accepted. If you are considering making an application, you are strongly encouraged to request the appropriate financial documentation (e.g. P21, P60, etc) from the relevant source immediately as

there are usually delays in obtaining this information.

Damage to the N11 bus stop September 2009. Photo: Catriona Laverty

Talks ongoing to restore Dublin Bus Service BRIDGET FITZSIMONS

CD representatives and the Students’ Union have entered in to talks with Dublin Bus in a bid to resolve the interruption to the Belfield bus service. Dublin buses, particularly those coming from the N11, have been periodically not entering the campus or stopping at the N11 stops for the last two years. Currently the 46A and 145 services stop after 8pm only at the drivers’ discretion, and the number 10 bus does not enter the campus grounds. Busdrivers’ unions may ballot their members on whether they will reinstate the service to Belfield during the next weeks. Drivers have stated that the bad behaviour and drunken state of students using the service at night time have prompted them

to withdraw services in fears for their safety. SU President, Gary Redmond, has been involved in the talks with Dublin Bus, UCD and the Gardaí. He told The University Observer that the talks have resulted in reasonable success, saying that the SU “are working to implement a number of measures that we hope will allow Dublin Bus to resume the number 10 bus service on campus in the evenings […] progress has been made in this regard.” Redmond urged students to think of their behaviour when on buses, so that the future of the UCD services might be more certain. He declared he would “ask for all students to stop and think about how their actions might affect others”, and added that the SU had launched a campaign encouraging students to behave in a more appropriate manner on public transport.

A spokesperson for UCD has confirmed the University’s involvement in the campaign, saying that “several measures including an awareness campaign are being employed to address the anti-social behaviour on Dublin Bus which led to the withdrawal of the service.” Political Science Masters student, Anthony Costello, expressed his disappointment with the lack of services for students who choose to stay on campus late at night. As a Masters student currently working on a thesis proposal, Costello stated that “I often wouldn’t leave the library ‘til half ten and even then, with my last bus at half eleven, I can’t get it because they refuse to stop – so I have to get a taxi home.” However, he understood the reasoning for Dublin Bus’s withdrawal, adding that drunken and disorderly students “should be refused” travel.

Lighting fault causes safety issues at UCD observatory EMMA ALKEN Lecturers in the UCD School of English, Drama and Film have advised students attending lectures held at the O’Kane Centre for Film Studies to leave their classes in small groups, following problems lighting the area during darkness hours. Although there is street lighting around the laneway up to O’Kane centre, it has been non-functioning since the beginning of the semester. A spokesperson for the University stated that, “Buildings & Services are currently in the process of returning the lights in question to full working order. The University encourages all students to remain vigilant about personal safety on campus at all times.” Used for screenings for third year and postgraduate students, the Centre – more locally known as ‘the Observatory’ – is located off a laneway adjacent to Roebuck Road, and is quite isolated from campus. Many classes in the Conservatory are scheduled to take place during evening hours, meaning that the lack of lighting has become a safety issue for both staff and students. One Film Studies student criticised the inactivity of UCD’s Buildings &

Services Department in addressing the problems, telling The University Observer it was quite probable that “someone could easily fall and hurt themselves in the dark.” The lighting problem does not solely affect UCD students, as many residents from the surrounding areas take walks or jog in the vicinity. Students’ Union President, Gary Redmond, was quick to assure students that their safety was a top priority for the SU. He stated that “obviously the safety of students is paramount, and there should be an adequate amount of lighting and security in all public areas on campus.” He reported to have “been in touch with Buildings & Services regarding the lighting at the Observatory, and they assure me that this is being investigated and shouldn’t have occurred.” The Frank O’Kane Centre for Film Studies was built as a magnetic observatory in the grounds of Trinity College in 1838. The observatory was dismantled to make way for further development of the Trinity College campus and rebuilt in Belfield between 1974 and 1975. It was converted to a film screening area in 2003 after a donation from businessman and philanthropist, Dr Frank O’Kane.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

NEWS

news@universityobserver.ie

Sports Centre increases revenue despite fund cut GAVAN REILLY

Crèche extension to open by December SARAH DORAN

ork has begun on an extension to UCD’s Oakmount Crèche, due to be finished by December this year. Centre Manager, Jennifer Kinsella, told The University Observer that the new building will allow Oakmount to offer an additional 51 spaces, enabling the centre – which currently caters for 61 children – to increase its capacity to over 100. The crèche will also begin a new afterschool service, which will run from 1pm to 6.15pm, catering for children from ages four to nine. According to Kinsella, one million euro in funding for the new extension will come from the National Development Plan, with the project being “helped along by the University also.” Kinsella commented that the centre currently has waiting lists for the crèche facilities that extend to a year or more. Kinsella stated that the main aim of the extension is to alleviate the demand the facility has faced in recent times. She said “it’s very frustrating if families are

ringing up at least a year in advance, the moment they become pregnant, to put their name down, and we don’t have the space to give them.” Kinsella also admitted that, prior to the annoucement of the plans for extension, the crèche “just found it really difficult to be able to cater for the need on campus.” While Kinsella felt that the crèche has been in need of the extension for a long time, she says that its expansion means that “we’ll be able to provide a better service to the campus.” The new extension will encompass a development known as ‘The Magic Room’, containing sensorial walls, stages and lights. A new garden for young babies will also be created which, it is hoped, will offer a safer and more varied place for them to play. Oakmount is located near the Clonskeagh entrance to the Belfield campus and caters for children of both staff and students. Kinsella highlighted that students “have the capacity to apply for a student subsidy”, which is means-tested and allows students to receive discounts of up to half the total fee.

Please Talk retains funding despite cuts JACK HORGAN-JONES The ‘Please Talk’ student support campaign looks set to retain its funding despite widespread budget cuts to other government funded agencies. The nationwide campaign, which originated in UCD, has recived nearly €100,000 in funding since its inception in 2007, following the deaths by suicide of a number of UCD students. The campaign encourages students to contact counselling services should they feel depressed at any stage during the college year. This is done primarily through the pleasetalk.ie website. Please Talk is funded by the National Office for Suicide Prevention (NOSP), which is in turn funded by the Health Services Executive (HSE). Geoff Day, Director of NOSP, outlined the process by which Please Talk receives its funding: “The funding is made available through the HSE’s innovation fund. We’re not allowed to reduce that even though we’ve made reductions in all of our other budgets.” Although funding has not been cut, Day pointed out that unused funding from last year had been carried over into the operational budget for this year. Therefore there has been a reduction in the gross originally provided for the campaign, thought to have been in the region of €112,000. “Please Talk came in with a revised costing because they carried over some

funding from last year which they didn’t use, so we adjusted. But we have still funded them fully in terms of helping them extend to all the colleges in Ireland. There’s no cut, but they reduced the amount of money they needed this year by carrying over money from last year. That’s normal practice.” Despite funding Please Talk, NOSP has no operational involvement or any supervisory role in the distribution of funds. Day confirmed that NOSP “do not get involved in the day to day operations of all of our projects.” Day was anxious to state his support for the campaign, describing Please Talk as “an important initiative taken by students themselves” and concluded that Please Talk was “from our point of view, really positive. It’s a simple way of saying to people, ‘here’s what’s available’.” When requested by The University Observer to provide a breakdown of the distribution of funds received by Please Talk, campaign agent Barry Colfer responded that the “funding is used primarily for items including the design, production, and distribution of the thousands of different materials – badges, pens, t-shirts, fliers, mugs, banners, balloons, material holders, et cetera – used to promote the campaign including postage to campuses across the country, as well as web expenses, pay cost and the costs associated with traveling to campuses and committee meetings throughout Ireland.”

The management of the UCD Sports Centre have reported an increase in operating revenue for the financial year ending 30th September, despite a fall in the subsidy paid to it by the University authorities to fund its activities. According to Superintendant of Sports Facilities, Kevin Barnes, the Centre faced a funding cut from the University of 12 per cent for the current financial year, which ends tomorrow, with a further 8 per cent cut expected for the coming twelve months, in line with uniform expenditure cuts throughout the University. Barnes attributed the increase in revenue to the increased public use of the Sports Centre’s climbing wall, which has been advertised as a novel venue for children’s birthday parties, and of the polygrass pitch alongside the National Hockey Stadium – popular amongst outside users as a football pitch. The synthetic Devlin Park GAA and R2 Rugby pitches have also seen improved usage since their refurbishment in 2007 – the latter notably as a training venue for the Ireland senior international rugby squad – but revenue from these sources is ring-fenced towards repayment on the two million euro mortgage taken by the Sports Centre to fund their renovation. Barnes told The University Observer that “the facilities are primarily for the

use of students, and the prime usage time – between 5pm and 10pm throughout the winter months – doesn’t make any money because student clubs, quite rightly, have them free of charge.” He also stated that the ‘Get in Gear’ programme offered by the Sports Centre for €30 per person actually costs about €160 per person to operate, but added that the Sports Centre is intended to provide a holistic service to the student body, rather than to act as a revenue generator for the University. Any income garnered from the activities of the Sports Centre is reinvested in the High Performance Unit within the University, and funds the full-time GAA, soccer and rugby executives who administer the respective sports clubs. While revenue from outside usage of the University’s sports facilities has risen in recent years, Barnes warned that problems would likely arise when the flooring of the main Sports Centre

halls, and the bleacher seating areas, are due for renovation within a few years, remarking that to refit the halls would cost “hundreds of thousands of euro”, while the Centre was “just managing to balance the books” at the present time. Barnes paid tribute to the staff of the Sports Centre who were responsible for money-spinning ideas such as the use of the climbing wall as a party venue, and commended them for being “very, very highly motivated.”

“Any income garnered from the activities of the Sports Centre is reinvested in the High Performance Unit within the University, and funds the fulltime GAA, soccer and rugby executives who administer the respective sports clubs”

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

ANALYSIS

news@universityobserver.ie

Freshers’ dis-orientation With confusion surrounding the scheduling of Orientation Week in 2010, Bridget Fitzsimons asks why UCD seems content to project an image of inefficiency to its incoming students News Editor Bridget Fitzsimons

e all remember the excitement of our first Orientation Week: the tours, the free diaries, and the IT tutorials we did just to get a free USB key. We had gotten out of school, chosen UCD and were – for the most part – happy to have arrived in Belfield with a few years’ college life ahead of us. Next year’s wave of incoming freshers, however, may not have this happy and secure feeling. Next year’s Orientation Week looks to be problematic to say the least. As the June Bank Holiday falls later than usual in 2010, on Monday 7th June, the Leaving Certificate exams will not start until two days later, on Wednesday 9th June. This, in turn, causes a chain reaction that will ultimately bring chaos to the orientation period. With the examinations starting later than usual, CAO offers will also be delayed by a week: so late, in fact, that the CAO First Round offers will not be issued until the first day of what UCD have scheduled to be Orientation Week. This is clearly a logistical nightmare that raises a range of questions. UCD is a university that attracts students from around the country, and indeed from around the world. It is understandable that prospective students-to-be simply will not be willing to make a cross-country trip for two or three days of orientation, when they cannot know for sure if they will, in fact, actually be enrolling in the University. This group of students will also be left to deal with the problems that will invariably rise with on-campus residences. Traditionally, with the first batch of CAO offers being released on the Monday

after Leaving Certificate results, students intending to apply for a campus bedroom could not apply until three days after their offer had been accepted. If this former model is to continue, first year students will be unable to apply to the campus residences – at the very earliest – until four days before tuition begins. Will the University be sending out orientation packs to every student who applies for a course? One fundamental problem is that even after student accepts their CAO offer, UCD are not formally notified for two days thereafter – meaning that the University will be dealing with students entirely unknown to them, but who can validly claim to have begun registration. Can anyone who puts UCD on their CAO form turn up to the President’s address? The problems are innumerable, and do not stop with the incoming first years. If UCD decide to delay their orientation by a week to cope with the logistical problems that will arise, problems with examinations will be encountered. The current 2010 calendar schedules the first semester’s exams to end on the 17th December, a Friday. Delaying orientation by one week would require the University to either fix some exams for Christmas Eve, or to remove the Sunday moratorium on exams – inevitably causing another logistical headache for staff and students alike. UCD would thus have to choose between creating problems for new students, trying to settle into life in UCD, or for the whole University by pushing back the last day of exams to include the Christmas week. It seems UCD, by virtue of being a fully semesterised institution with exams before Christmas, is the only third level

institution to be affected by next year’s amended schedule. The problems that the University will face as a result are a mere drop in the ocean, though, with financial cutbacks continuing all over the University. They are visible in every facet of campus. This cutback, though, seems to be on intelligence: why is it that we are incapable of simple planning and proper semester structure that can allow for the smooth running of a university? This disorganisation and poor planning echoes an earlier decision to cut Programme Office opening hours just when they are needed most. UCD seems oblivious to the fact that proper investment in certain areas saves money on administration and related costs, and logistical woes for those involved. If this problem had been dealt with properly and efficiently, we would not bear witness to countless meetings with innumerable people scratching their heads in a vain attempt to find a solution for yet another problem that seems only to affect UCD. Simply put, this is not the message our University should be sending to incoming students. If the first process they encounter at UCD is a troublesome and inconvenient registration process, what reason do they have not to believe that the rest of the experience will be the same? A University is only as good as the students it attracts, so both projecting an efficient image and actually enacting it is vital for UCD. Instead of procrastinating and thoughtless planning, positive action needs to be taken to avoid endless administrational problems so that next year’s first years can easily adapt to what should be a exciting new chapter in their young lives.

Next year’s new students are set to have a stressful orientation period. Photo: File

Keeping it Fresh Record levels of society membership don’t tell the whole story of declining student participation in extra-curricular activity, according to Gavan Reilly, and the time has come for UCD to act Balancing the need for a healthy social life with a reasonable academic effort in a college environment is never easy. A vibrant social atmosphere and a tough academic workload never make easy bedfellows. Since beginning the arduous process of semesterisation and modularisation in 2005, UCD has seen this particular marriage hit rocky times, as the academic duties of a conveyor belt of exams and continuous assessment impact on the free time students find on their hands, and their ability to engage in extra-curricular activities. The continued ability of UCD’s vast and dazzling array of student societies and sports clubs not only to stay alive, but to continue attracting more and more students as members, as well as repeatedly bettering their lists of celebrity guests throughout each year, must be congratulated. While sporting and society life in Belfield is subsidised to no small end by the University, student institutions largely

survive with whatever sponsorship they can muster in the current financially lean climate, as well as the modest revenue earned through membership fees. Sadly, raw data like membership levels of college societies does not tell the whole story, and college life cannot realistically claim to be in such rude health as it might have been a few short years ago. While the primary role of any university is of course to act as an educational institution, imparting its students with the intelligence to make salient and substantial contributions to wider society, the importance of a healthy social environment cannot be understated. Interpersonal and emotional aptitude are of inestimable value to any person, and the best way for an educational institution – particularly one of UCD’s mammoth size and diversity – to nurture such competencies amongst students is the continued support and sustenance of the extra-curricular variety for which UCD is uniquely famed. It’s

worth noting in this regard that, a few exceptions aside, membership of political societies saw a steep fall on campus this year. When outlining his own idealistic blueprint of a college and its role in society, UCD’s founder, Cardinal John Henry Newman, described a university as “the high protecting power of all knowledge and science, of fact and principle, of inquiry and discovery of experiment and speculation”. That UCD has survived 155 years and lived to tell the tale of monumental social, political and economic changes in Ireland is a remarkable feat, but alongside UCD’s incalculable contribution to Irish academia is the awesome role it has had in giving hundreds of thousands of new students a place in which to lay the foundations of their adult lives; to meet like-minded souls, be exposed to new concepts and thoughts, and debate the issues of the day; to undergo the metamorphosis from ageing teenager to

young, confident, complete adult. All of these roles are vital to the standing of a university like ours, and all of these were put at real risk of withering away under the academic strain that students found themselves facing under the revamped academic structures. The attempts of the University over the past years to re-instil a sense of ‘community’, while well intentioned and worthy of praise, have been delivered in a method somewhat wide of the mark. With students finding themselves with less time to get involved in extra-curricular activity, let alone to help organise it, it is myopic of UCD to assume that blithely organising a Community Musical, for example, will instil a sense of neighbourly pride amongst a student body comprising tens of thousands. While such projects of course reap just rewards, it must be acknowledged that the most communal feelings nurtured

by a musical are largely restricted to the core group of students who organise such productions. Students watching a production in O’Reilly Hall might be able to appreciate the work that goes into staging a show, but they are much less likely to feel like an active part of it. The establishment of a Musical Society, allowing more people to get involved at their own pace, is a step in the right direction. There is no quick fix solution; no magic wand that can be waved to restore student life to health. There are scores of societies and clubs in UCD, each catering for their own miniature communities, and each deserving of its own special attention. The role of the University must be to nurture and assist each of these individual institutions if a real and lasting sense of community is to be forged on our maturing campus.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

COMMENT

comment@universityobserver.ie

On two wheels and a prayer

aris, Seville, Brussels, Vienna, Dublin. Normally were you to see a list of those cities, the question, “Which is the odd one out?” would spring to mind. Usually you would be correct in saying Dublin. On this occasion, however, this list isn’t to Dublin’s detriment – as last month Dublin joined those cities in offering a public bicycle scheme. For those unaware with what a public bike scheme entails, it’s a pretty simple concept. Anyone can rent a bike from a terminal in a city and return it to the same terminal, or a different one somewhere else in the city, for only a nominal charge. To prevent theft, you must usually enter your credit card details and guarantee a fee if the bike is not returned – in Dublin a fine of €150 is levied if the bike is not returned within 24 hours. For any city to introduce such a service is laudable: firstly, it helps to promote cycling as a mode of transport. Cycling has several advantages over other forms of transport: it maintains a cyclist’s fitness levels; it’s kind to the environment, with zero emissions; and it’s more comfortable than a humid, packed bus – as many Dublin Bus users can grudgingly confirm. Moreover, from the perspective of tourism, the scheme is particularly welcome. It facilitates the advertisement of a city as a place to holiday, presenting it as a destination with good public amenities. It offers a way for people to see the sites from their own perspective and at their own pace, rather than on the top of an open-air bus. In Dublin such amenities are particularly necessary to ensure that the capital is an enjoyable city to visit, especially with the difficulties facing

the tourism industry in these uncertain economic times. Compared to more rural destinations, cities have a more difficult task in staying competitive for tourists. Rural attractions are generally areas of environmental and historical interest; they mainly need stimulating conservation and easy access to stay attractive. Cities, however, need to offer more than just environmental and historic attractions. A fusion of culture and nightlife with the modernism that only innovative developments and investment can bring about makes a city appealing to those who want a city break. A cycling scheme helps facilitate this. For a cycling scheme to take off successfully, there needs to be a well thought out, affordable system in place. Dublinbikes certainly ticks this box, allowing the first half hour of use for

cated in Dublin city centre, which is great for tourism as mentioned earlier, but a nightmare for safety. Road works are commonplace in the city, particularly around the new Luas developments near the IFSC which houses four bike terminals. Anyone who has braved city cycling can understand the risk that arises when the road surface is reduced to potholes and uneven tarmac as a result of construction works. Even worse is the lack of dedicated cycle lanes within the city centre streets. The lack of demarcated routes for cyclists opens them up to kerb-hugging drivers, which can tragically result in someone

James Fagan assesses the benefits and potential problems of the new Dublin bikes scheme Comment Editor James Fagan meeting the business end of a truck, as happened to a male cyclist on Wellington Quay two weeks ago. While cyclists must endeavour to wear protective clothing, forcing them to mix with heavy traffic is asking for trouble. What is worrying is that users of this scheme will be unlikely to use helmets, considering none are provided at the terminals, thereby increasing their risk of serious injury if they get in an accident. The solutions to these problems are not easy to come by. A push towards a more pedestrianised city centre could potentially help, but any such move would

likely face strong opposition from local businesses. A possible solution would be the creation of Quality Bus Corridors on the inside lanes of all roads within the city centre, and not just at certain sections. The recent conversion of College Green into a bus corridor is a welcome move in the right direction, as it removes congestion from one of the busiest interchanges in the city. Whatever concerns hang over the scheme, it should be welcomed for the potential benefit it brings to Dublin – but whether the scheme takes full flight remains to be seen.

From the perspective of tourism, the scheme is particularly welcome free, with bike terminals just 300 metres away from each other. However there are a number of issues which may ultimately make the service a failure. The scheme is lo-

Adding fuel to the fire treated at a hospital within the compound For 18 of the past 21 years, Somalia were also killed. has been without a stable, functioning Rebel spokesman Sheikh Ali Mohamud government. Since Mohamed Siad Barre Rage told Reuters his comrades “had got was ousted in 1991, the resultant power our revenge for our brother Nabhan… struggle has resulted in the deaths of praise Allah... We knew the infidel govthousands of civilians. The most recent ernment and AU troops planned to attack violence illustrates how little peace has us after the holy month [Ramadan]. This been achieved since. is a message to them.” On Monday 14th September, US heliSuch an attack is copters attacked vehicles in the southFour young men were typical al-Shabaab communication. In ern town of Barawe, told they shouldn’t steal June, four young an area controlled by hardline Islamist as each had an arm and men were told they shouldn’t steal, as al-Shabaab rebels. a leg amputated each had an arm and The attack killed a leg amputated in Saleh Ali Saleh front of 300 citizens. To explain that being Nabhan, a Kenyan al-Qaeda suspect, a spy is abandoning Islam, they beheaded wanted by US and Kenyan authorities for seven people in July. That same month, attacks carried out in his homeland in 2002. The helicopters took the bodies with two ‘unwelcome’ French security advisors them, but didn’t prevent rising anger from were abducted from the Sahafi Hotel; one of these men is still missing. Al-Shabaab’s rebels who’d had a revered leader stolen uncompromising interpretation of the from them. Qur’an is well known, and it is near Backlash was inevitable, but nobody impossible to consider their contribution foresaw the shattering suicide bomb to peace talks. attack carried out three days later. Two When co-operation was last propvehicles, loaded with explosives and a UN erly attempted in mid-2008, the Somali insignia, were detonated in a peacekeepGovernment signed a ceasefire with the ing base near the airport. Seventeen Afriopposition Alliance for Re-Liberation of can Union peacekeepers died, including Somalia. The arrangement was intended the deputy commander of the peacekeeping mission. Several Somali civilians being to allow foreign troops leave Somalia

A typical bike terminal, displaying the new city-orientated bikes

Global anxiety over Somalia has been high forever, Alex Court writes that it’s tough to see how U.S. troops taking pot shots at rebel leaders is going to result in regional stability within four months, but was rejected, with Islamist Somali leader Hassan Dahir Aweys insisting his soldiers wouldn’t stop fighting until all foreign troops had left Somalia. This demand left foreign forces stranded in a country where they were constantly under fire, stuck in a situation where compromise needed to come from the Islamists. Al-Shabaab’s hatred of international ‘meddlers’ extends to fellow Somalis who co-operate with the West. Journalists and aid workers are murdered by militants, while the national government, perceived by extremists as being under the thumb of Washington, is constantly attacked. Consequently, government rule is only effec-

tive in parts of Mogadishu, and protecting the cabinet is often impossible. Somalia’s security minister was murdered in a suicide bomb attack on a hotel in June. Are any notions of GovernmentShabaab reconciliation on the table? Hopes were raised in April as Somalia’s parliament voted unanimously to formally introduce Islamic ‘Sharia’ law. This, initially, met a key Shabaab demand, and seemed to distance the UN-backed government from the US, pleasing militant Islamists. It soon became clear, however, that this attempt at peace was not enough for the extremists. The Prime Minister, and his African Union backing, refrained from

embarking on a programme of severing hands, stoning rape victims or beheading spies – the only version of Sharia Law, it seems, al-Shabaab will accept. What, then, do assassinations carried out by American servicemen add to all this? The international community is worried that Somalia may become a global hotspot for Islamic terrorists – a genuine concern, as it is already apparent that foreign fighters, a large proportion of which are thought to hail from Pakistan, are fighting with al-Shabaab. On the one hand, America et al cannot ignore the mindless violence still taking place, and wait idly by while Somalia’s problem becomes East Africa’s problem, which then becomes Africa’s problem, which then becomes everyone’s problem. On the other hand, assassinations like that of Nabhan will undoubtedly cause backlashes on the scale of the attack that killed seventeen well-intentioned African Union peacekeepers. Al-Shabaab will not listen to American violence, and America probably won’t listen to criticism from Kenya’s foreign minister that “lone ranger behaviour” will not aid the goal of regional stability. Additionally, the United Nations cannot fold to the demands of extremists. Foreign troops can never be mandated to tolerate an insane interpretation of the Qur’an so as to justify the degrading, inhumane punishment supported by al-Shabaab. If one thing can be said of Somalia for definite, it is that the problems it faces will not disappear quickly. The overwhelming international effort must focus on supplying food and medical aid to the starving, dispossessed and uneducated masses who are powerless to help themselves, and not on trying to put out the insurgent fire with incendiary tactics.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

COMMENT

comment@universityobserver.ie

UCD students set to Vote Yes to secure Ireland’s economy Micheál Martin TD, Minister for Foreign Affairs, believes Ireland’s open economy can only flourish with a Yes vote

n these turbulent times, one thing at least is certain: the EU is vital for Ireland. World events have highlighted the importance of a strong European Union providing global leadership and capable of dealing with the economic downturn. The Lisbon Treaty represents an important step towards resolving our present difficulties. Now that we have our legal guarantees in place to address the genuine concerns of last year, there are plenty of reasons for approving the Lisbon Treaty. The purpose of the Lisbon Treaty is to reform the EU, making it more dynamic and effective. Next Friday we will be asked if we want a better functioning Union or one that has its hands tied by out-of-date rules. If the past year has shown us anything, it’s that Ireland is best equipped to deal with the current financial and economic crises with the full force of the EU behind it. The liquidity provided to Irish Banks by the ECB has proved indispensable. The ECB has also ensured that our interest rates are at an all-time low. There is no doubt that the EU has helped Ireland to weather the economic storm. We need to keep this big picture in mind as we weigh up the merits of the Lisbon Treaty next Friday. Few would disagree that we have benefitted from our membership of the European Union. As a member of the EU, Ireland has direct access to 500 million consumers. Prior to joining the EEC in 1973, Britain was the main destination for Irish exports. Now 63% of all our exports go to the EU. Ireland’s membership of the EU and participation in the Single European Market has been the most significant factor in broadening our country’s economic horizons and ending our dependence on Britain. The Single European Market has helped indigenous Irish companies to develop their export performance. Two out of every three jobs in Ireland now depend on exports. Equally, it has helped Ireland to attract a vastly disproportionate share of foreign direct investment, particularly from US companies. Multinational companies view access to European markets as a key factor in their investment decisions. With only one per cent of the Union’s population, Ireland attracted 25 per cent of all new US investment in Europe in the decade up to 2005. Our status as a positive member of the

EU has been fundamental to attracting a thousand foreign companies to locate here. These companies have created 150,000 jobs directly, and approximately 200,000 others indirectly. Our capacity to continue bringing in investment will be crucial to our future prospects. A resounding Yes vote would send a strong political message to foreign investors that we are fully committed to the EU. At a time when competition for foreign investment is very strong, Ireland would not benefit from sending out confused signals about our future in Europe. As someone who has participated in many meetings with people who invest in this country or are considering it, I can say very clearly that Ireland’s place as a positive country at the heart of Europe has been a critical competitive advanTitle: UCD Students set tage. : This is the model that has worked for us before; we must now decide if we want to abandon it. • Those who say that we can reject Lisbon, and leave our standing within the Author: Gavan Reilly Union and our international reputation Word Count: 399 unaffected, are seriously mistaken. I have not met a single serious job creator who believes that there is any conceivable positive economic side to a No vote. A further rejection of the Treaty would undermine our hard won image as a good place to do business. This would ultimately cost us jobs and investment. Failure to pass the Treaty would also leave us in unchartered territory with regards to our European neighbours. Having addressed our concerns in relation to tax, the right to life, neutrality and the retention of our Commissioner, they would find it difficult to understand our motivation for voting No again. There is no doubt that the goodwill that we had built up over 36 years of pro-active membership would be diminished. Compromise and goodwill are the lifeblood of a union that is based on a shared sense of respect and responsibility. The vote on Friday is about creating a stronger, more dynamic Union. It is in all of interests to ensure that Ireland is part of a reformed Union that is better equipped to deal with the current economic challenges.

“A resounding Yes vote would send a strong political message to foreign investors that we are fully committed to the EU”

Micheál Martin TD is Minister for Foreign Aﬀairs and the Director of Elections for Fianna Fáil’s Lisbon referendum campaign.

to vote Yes to Lisbon

How are you voting on the Lisbon Treaty? • 57% of students in favour, 17% against; 22% undecided • Two-thirds of undecided student voters are female GAVAN REILLY UCD Students are likely to vote overwhelmingly in favour of the Lisbon Treaty, with 57 per cent of those polled preparing to vote Yes in Friday’s referendum, while 22 per cent of students have yet to decide how they will cast their votes. An exclusive poll released today by The University Observer, taken late last week on the DON’T KNOW Belfield campus, showed that only 17 per cent of students intend to vote No to the Treaty, a much 112 lower proportion of voters than are indicated 22.4% in recent nationwide opinion polls. Of students who were NO yet to decide how to 86 vote, over two thirds – 68 17.2% per cent – were female. Male voters surveyed expressed greater support for the referendum, with 66 per cent of respondents intending to vote Yes, 16 per cent voting No, and an almost identical number undecided on how to vote. Female voters were slightly less polarised, with just over 50 per cent having decided to support the Treaty, compared to 18 per cent disapproval. 28 per cent of female students were yet to decide how to cast their vote at Friday’s polls.

Splitting the results of the poll by each of UCD’s five Colleges, students in the College of Business & Law were most strongly supportive of the Treaty. 68 per cent of students in the College intended to vote Yes, with just 8 per cent against ratification. The College of Arts & Celtic Studies was the only one not to report a clear majority of Yes votes, though the pro-Lisbon vote still totals 47 per cent, with 24 per cent of students declaring themselves against the Treaty. NOT VOTING Only 3.2 per cent of 16 students who have regis3.2% tered to vote said they were unlikely to vote in Friday’s referendum. 500 students took part in The University Observer’s survey, which was undertaken on Thursday YES and Friday of last week in a 286 variety of major buildings 57.2% throughout the Belfield campus. Meanwhile a poll of NUI Galway students at a debate organised by their Literary and Debating Society showed a very narrow margin of victory for the Yes side. As with the first referendum, these results would suggest greater support for the Yes side in the Dublin area, than in more rural parts of the country. Unlike with the first referendum however, the Yes side appears to be narrowly leading with students in the west.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

COMMENT

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vote ‘Yes’ to Lisbon Reject a corporate, militarised Europe Joe Higgins MEP writes that Lisbon attacks workers’ rights and further militarises the European Union

Title: UCD Students set to vote Yes to Lisbon : • Author: Gavan Reilly Word Count: 399

UCD VOTES

Male voters

bon

DON’T KNOW

NOT VOTING 6

Title: UCD Students set to vote Yes to Lisbon :

2.68% 35

• NO

YES

147

16.07%

65.63%

Female voters

Undecided voters

NOT VOTING

DON’T KNOW

3.62%

MEN 35

31.25%

WOMEN

27.9%

YES 139

68.75%

50.36% NO 50

18.12%

force them to open up their Health or Education services to be traded as commodities. Lisbon categorically removes this veto except in very limited circumstances. IBEC, the employers’ organisation campaigning for a Yes vote is very clear on the consequences, declaring in a submission to the Forum on Europe: “The Lisbon Reform Treaty creates the legal basis for the liberalisation of services of general economic interest. A Yes vote creates the potential for increased opportunities for Irish business, particularly in areas subject to increasing liberalisation such as health, education, transport, energy and the environment.” Thus, Lisbon could institutionalise a disastrous privatisation policy, while denying people the right to try to force a change in this policy. The Lisbon Treaty would give a significant further thrust to the militarisation of the European Union. Article 42 of the Treaty on the European Union would declare “Member States shall undertake progressively to improve their military capabilities”. In addition, the €60 billion European armaments industry, purveyors of instruments of death to horrific regimes internationally, is brought to the very heart of the EU with this Treaty. For the first time the European Defence Agency, whose key role is promoting that armaments industry, is given an institutional basis in an EU Treaty. Lisbon also allows the most powerful military states to set up military alliances amongst themselves within the EU. It would crush the right of Ireland to conduct an independent foreign policy. It says “member states shall support the unions external and security policy actively and unreservedly in the spirit of loyalty and mutual solidarity”. The Lisbon Treaty represents the aggressive, neo-liberal agenda of the EU big business, military and political establishment. It is seriously damaging to the interests of the vast majority across Europe. It should be rejected on Friday, with a wide-ranging debate begun about what kind of Europe we want. In my opinion, that should be a socialist Europe: a Europe where the vast resources are used to benefit ordinary people, instead of maximising big business profits.

“The Lisbon Treaty is seriously damaging to the interests of the vast majority across Europe”

15.63%

Methodology Author: Gavan Reilly Students were interviewed on Thursday 24th and Friday 25th September, and asked, Word Count: 399 “Are you registered to vote, and if so, how are you planning on voting in the Lisbon Treaty referendum?” A small additional number of staff were also interviewed but their responses were later discounted. The responses of students who were ineligible to vote or who were not registered to do so were disregarded. The total number of valid responses tabulated in the survey was 500.

he debate on the Lisbon Treaty has been marked by a complete absence of engagement by the Yes side. Those in favour of Lisbon have refused to debate with either the arguments of serious No campaigners (preferring to ridicule the likes of Cóir) or the actual text of the Treaty. Instead, the establishment have tried to engage in a campaign of empty generalities – encouraging us to vote Yes variously for jobs, the economy and for Europe. Therefore, it is necessary to state clearly that the vote on October 2nd is not about any of these things. Instead, this is a crucial vote on the future direction of the European Union for many decades to come. If passed, Lisbon would enshrine the agenda of the economic and political elite in the European Union. In this article, I want to focus on three crucial areas - the copperfastening of attacks on workers’ rights, the pushing of a privatisation agenda and the extensive further militarisation of the EU. The Yes side has attempted to create the impression that Lisbon will improve workers’ rights. They point to the “Solemn Declaration” on workers’ rights and to the Charter of Fundamental Rights. The “solemn declaration” is a vague aspirational document, which has as much standing as a pre-election promise of Fianna Fáil. Not only would the Charter not improve the conditions of workers; in fact, it would mark a change for the worse. That is because the Charter (in Paragraph 1 of Article 52) explicitly states that workers’ rights are limited. In the official explanation, which is given legal basis in Lisbon, this is stated to be in accordance with the case law, “in particular in the context of a common organisation of the market”. However, the case law (Laval, Ruffert and Luxemburg) has been universally bad for the interests of workers. The European Court of Justice has repeatedly interpreted the Posting of Workers Directive in such a way as to legitimise the paying of lower wages and conditions to migrant workers. Thus, we are being asked to vote yes to limiting workers’ rights, institutionalising the vicious “race to the bottom” in workers’ wages and conditions. A vital change from the point of view of the European business establishment is contained in the changes to how services are entered into world trade talks by the EU. Up to now, any member state could veto a proposal that would

Joe Higgins is the Socialist Party MEP for Dublin. www.joehiggins.eu

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The only way out With the recession trundling on, Shane Murphy looks at the government’s proposal to kickstart the economy using NAMA

NAMA has faced much backlash since its announcement in April’s emergency budget

longside the Lisbon Treaty referendum this week and December’s Budget, the success of the National Asset Management Agency (NAMA) is central to the current government’s hopes of regaining the trust of the public and turning Ireland’s faltering economy around. Against the backdrop of a sceptical electorate, a wavering coalition partner, and fierce opposition from across the floor of the Dáil, Finance Minister Brian Lenihan and his Fianna Fáil colleagues face one of the biggest challenges of their time in office. With NAMA billed by media and politicians alike as the most important piece of legislation in the history of the state, the stakes – both for the economy and the government – could not be much higher. In order to assess NAMA, it is important to recognise why government intervention is crucial to resuscitating the Irish economy. The Irish banking sector is a victim both of the global economic

downturn and of its own profligacy. When Irish housing prices crashed, the country’s main lenders found themselves severely over-exposed to insolvent property developers. Many of the loans on the books of Ireland’s two largest banks, AIB and Bank of Ireland, are badly impaired and worth barely a fraction of their original value. As a result, Irish banks have dramatically cut their lending – bringing the economy to a grinding halt. It must be understood that without a fully-operational banking sector, the economy cannot function, let alone recover from a crisis of this magnitude. In order for industry to regain strength and jobs to be created, it is essential the banking liquidity is restored. The mechanism by which NAMA would do this is a rather complex one. The agency will purchase about €77bn worth of toxic loans (mostly related to the property sector) from Irish banks. These loans will be bought at a knockdown price of roughly €54bn. While this valuation

is above current market prices, it reflects the likelihood of a future rise in the value of these loans alongside an expected resurgence in the Irish property market. NAMA will buy these toxic loans with government bonds, which will then be used by the banks as collateral to borrow money from the European Central Bank (ECB). It is envisaged that the agency will break even initially, as costs are offset against interest repayments on loans – and depending on the size and speed of Ireland’s climb out the recession, it may begin to turn a small profit after several years. Among the criticisms of the proposal is the notion that it will ‘bail out’ those who are responsible for the crisis – bankers and developers. In the case of bankers, this is true to a certain extent. However, the simple truth is that the banks must be bailed out, in some way or another, in order for them to start lending again and for the economy to recover. In addition to NAMA, the government has indicated that it is prepared to increase its ownership in AIB and Bank of Ireland if necessary. On the other hand, the accusation that NAMA will bail out the property developers who caused this financial mess is plainly untrue. As Colm McCarthy – UCD lecturer and chairman of an Bord Snip Nua – recently commented, developers who currently owe money to the banks will merely have their debts transferred to NAMA. They will still owe just as much as they did before. While the term ‘bailout’ has become popular in the last 12 months, its inaccurate association

with NAMA has damaged the esteem with which the agency is held in the public. Global reaction to the government’s proposal has been positive, including a full endorsement from the International Monetary Fund. The rate at which the Irish government pays interest on its international borrowing has fallen, an indication that foreign governments regard the measure as the way forward for the economy. NAMA has been backed by the European Commission, and falls within the Commission’s guidelines on state-aid to the banking sector. Domestically, public opinion on the matter is divided. The current government

The current government is the most unpopular since the foundation of the State, and is thus struggling to sell any policy to the public – never mind one which as complex as NAMA is the most unpopular since the foundation of the State, and is thus struggling to sell any policy to the public – never mind one which as complex as NAMA. On the other hand, Minister Brian Lenihan

should be lauded for his recent media outings, in which he has shown a keen grasp of the underlying economic issues associated with NAMA, and an impressive of the command legislation’s finer details. Politically, NAMA presents several challenges to the government. That Fine Gael and Labour have split over proposed repairs to the banking sector has undoubtedly strengthened Fianna Fáil’s hand. Enda Kenny and Richard Bruton have struggled to have their ‘Good Bank/ Bad Bank’ plan included in the mainstream debate, while Labour’s plans to fully nationalise Ireland’s banks have also failed to capture the imagination of the public. Meanwhile, the Green Party membership, in line with their constitution allowing card-carrying members to ratify important decisions made by their TDs, will vote on the NAMA legislation in October. With the Greens still reeling from their abysmal performance in June’s European and Local elections, the membership may put aside their grievances about NAMA in order to avoid collapsing the government and having to face the electorate again. Any complex economic rescue package is likely to be a hard sell to a recession-hit Irish public. However, the intricacies of NAMA have also made it difficult for the Opposition to highlight any weaknesses. NAMA makes economic sense, and, crucially, does not impose an additional tax burden on the public. It will return liquidity to Irish banks and make it easier for Irish businesses to borrow. This should, eventually, bring jobs and some semblance of prosperity back to the country.

Red Dragon spreads its wings America’s “neglect” of Latin America in foreign policy over the last decade comes with a price in the emerging geopolitical tussle with China argues Shane Murphy Ten years ago, China’s presence in Latin America was nominal at best. Its economic and political influence was minimal, it had no foothold in the Americas, and its prospects of gaining sway in the region looked bleak. The US, at the height of its power after the fall of communism and successful NATO operations in the Balkans, was master of all it surveyed. Through a mix of soft power and the threat of hard, it was able to bring most to heel – especially in its traditional sphere of orbit. Washington could never have envisaged the situation currently unfolding. A decade on, it is a peripheral actor in many areas in Latin America. Leftist regimes in Venezuela, Ecuador, Bolivia, Nicaragua, and (to a lesser extent) Peru continually lambast American imperialism, and have poignantly turned to China. With a near insatiable appetite for raw materials and energy, Beijing has zealously capitalised on American intransigence. A decade is a long time in politics. The matter of how the US could move from a position of such unilateral strength to one of weakness in a matter of years, invariably lies in the policies of the Bush presidency. A crass approach to foreign policy, especially in its own backyard, ensued – in which resources and efforts were dispatched to contest wars in the Middle East, while Latin America and its many problems were neglected. Bush’s gung-ho approach to Afghanistan and his even more cavalier approach to Iraq generated much alienation. The rhetoric emanating from the adminis-

tration also drew consternation from Latin American leaders. They began to look at less ideologically suited partners in an attempt to wean themselves of America. While the US was preoccupied fighting its War on Terror in Afghanistan, and leading a merry-go-round in Iraq, China quietly increased its presence on the continent. Trade between China and Latin America soared eightfold, from $12.6 billion in 2000 to $102.6 billion in 2007. China’s newfound influence can be seen in almost every sphere of economic activity such as oil and gas production, mining, infrastructural projects and defence contracts. The election of a string of leftist populist leaders in opposition to American hegemony has strengthened China’s hand in economic but also political spheres. Hugo Chavez, Daniel Ortega, Rafael Correa and Evo Morales have lambasted American

influence in the region, and pointedly turned toward China. It is not just leftist regimes that China is currying favour with. Trade with countries such as Argentina, Chile and Uruguay has also increased dramatically. In a bold move, China has agreed to

replace the dollar in trade with Argentina, a $10 billion arrangement that will allow Argentina access to Chinese Yuan to pay for Chinese imports. This deal has been touted as an alternative to the prevailing system of world trade in which the dollar is dominant, much to the benefit of America. The symbolism has not gone unnoticed in Washington. Most worryingly, however, have been relations between China and Brazil. In the first six months of this year, China became Brazil’s single biggest export market. This is augmented by the fact that the Chinese Development Bank and the emerging oil giant Sinopec have lent Petrobras, Brazil’s state-controlled oil company, some $10 billion in return for 200,000 barrels of oil a day.

This recently led US Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton, to declare: “If you look at the gains particularly in Latin America, that China is making it’s quite disturbing”. Coupled with their substantial stakes in Venezuelan and Ecuadorian oilfields, China’s newfound prowess is a strategic nightmare for Washington. With traditional oil sources dwindling, and few signs of replacements on the horizon, the US has been out-manoeuvred in front of its own eyes. The importance of energy resources will become ever more apparent in the coming years as supplies dwindle in tandem with increasing Chinese acquisition of existing reserves in the region. America’s traditional hegemony over Latin America evolved out of the “Monroe Doctrine”, the recognition in the early 19th century that any interference from outside powers would inevitably clash with their interests. The “neglect” of South America by US policymakers under the Bush Presidency has cost Washington many of these important interests. As the first salvo of a long-term geopolitical tussle with China begins in earnest, this loss will prove much more costly in the years to come than either of the wars in Afghanistan or Iraq. The election of Barack Obama signalled a shift in US relations with many Latin countries, most notably Cuba. The question now is whether Obama will be able to act swiftly and decisively to contain the dragon from flexing its wings even further into America’s back yard.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

FEATURES

In his shoes

Can a change really do you good? Seán McGovern gets rid of his form-fitting blazers, reluctantly tugs on tracksuits, and heads out on campus to find out.

“T

he clothes maketh the man” is a cliché that has been paraphrased again and again since it first made its way into the English language. In our image conscious, consumerist society where self image is constantly changeable, it may even be truer than ever. A university like UCD acts as a microcosm of different races and cultures, a fact we know and accept. Yet no matter what the colour of skin or ethnic garment, heads will turn when someone wears something particularly eye-catching – or dare I say, particularly ridiculous. Admittedly, I am someone who would put a lot of thought into what I wear. There are many reasons – and I’m sure vanity is indeed one of them – but the truth is that I believe what I wear is a reflection of how I think, act and feel. “The man maketh the clothes”, if you like. Genetically Molloy-ified is what we could call my transformation; the Features Editor providing me with a sports bag containing hoodies and cantos. Time to say goodbye to my blazer, 70s pattern print shirt and fitted patterned trousers. My glasses had to go too. Fringe plastered up with gel, sports bag slung rakishly on my back, and I was ready to go. The concept was simple: how do people perceive you in a certain look? Can you act and behave a certain way, no matter what you’re wearing? The results were indeed mixed. The first person

I encountered was someone who knew me well; her opinion was therefore totally unbiased. She said she was so used to seeing me in my identifiable garb that I now looked “generic and boring”. My close friends, on the other hand, were much more vocal in their opinions. My closest friend described me as “horrid”, and was so taken aback by my appearance that she could not take me seriously when I spoke to her about matters unrelated to my appearance. When asked why her reaction was so animated, her response was simple. “It wasn’t you.” How I look and how I behave seem to be linked by how people perceive me. I was incredibly self-conscious while still aware that that I was blending in much more than usual. When I suggested the concept to First Year student, Claire Cunningham, she believed her friends wouldn’t take her seriously if she donned the uniform of the stereotypical D4 girl. “They’d laugh; they wouldn’t think I was serious because it would be so out of character.” Yet, as flimsy as this may sound, it raises some questions about established identity and even gender. It’s easy for me to make a generalisation about everyone who opts for the look I was wearing, but from an outside perspective there are many possible explanations for this particular sense of dress. Comfort is one of them. In my few hours in my out-of-body experience, I felt incredibly comfortable. In a learning environment of uncomfortable classrooms and

After lecture halls, it is one less discomfort when clothes are light and baggy. But is this a good enough reason? As informal as the look may be, a huge proportion of students wear the same style, raising the question of whether the image is solely by choice or rather formed by the particular group culture. Third Year student Roisin Keogh had more particular observations about ascribing to a look due to social pressure. “They’re certainly ascribing. It’s like a tribal uniform... it’s a uniform rather

Before than a look at this stage. I’ve never come across something so widespread and so long lasting either.” This question of being pressurised to look a certain way was a conclusion that many people arrived at when asked. While debate is encouraged as to what exactly the truth is, it is by no means a coincidence that that stereotypical attitudes have arisen from how certain groups dress. UCD does associate such humorous comment about the look of many of its students based on specula-

tion alone. My brief stint in the image of another man raised questions that so far I have been unable to answer, but which are much weightier than just my physical image. My attitude as a man, and the ideals of masculinity, came into play – and possibly suggested that how we look is an outward glance, or even a façade to the perceived ideals of gender roles. By the end I was happy to be back in my formfitted clothes. It’s good to me again.

I predict some quiet After watching the riotous antics of the Irish Farmers’ Association, Matt Gregg wonders why UCD’s great unwashed are unable to show the same protesting vigour

Why are students unable to follow the protesting example of farmers?

Photo: Alan Rowlette

armers sure know how to throw a good protest. That much is beyond doubt after the IFA’s stunt at Fianna Fáil’s think-in in Athlone. Who can honestly say they weren’t a little bit impressed by the victory of agricultural muscle over An Garda Síochana’s forces of law and order? Having spent my whole life in cities, my knowledge of anything rural has been pretty limited. My most lasting impression of farming was drawn largely from a childhood love of the movie Babe. With a happy ending and an Oscar under its belt, the film is clearly not without its

merits – but still, I just can’t help but wonder if my urban upbringing has left me without the knowledge I really need to understand why farmers have become such experts in the field of protesting. You can always count on farmers to be protesting about something. Protesting

little profit most farmers were making, some of you may well be inclined to don your flat cap and join them in the field of battle. But after the hearty student protest at the bar on ‘Black Monday’ failed to even get a mention in the Metro, let alone on RTÉ News, would farmers actually be all that pushed about accepting our help? Their display at the Hudson Hotel in Athlone combined the essential factors of time, timing and location into one solid protest. If only we had remembered these, perhaps the Irish nation would have being roaring us on in the fight against the temporary closure of our neighbourhood bar. Organisation was always going to be a tough one. You know it, I know it; pretty much everybody knows that time management is quite a challenge for students. There’s only so much pool to play, daytime television to watch and tea to drink while procrastinating the day away. Getting a good protest going isn’t exactly top priority. This blatantly showed in the timing of the event. A good protest should never be held at dusk. That’s just too grey, too boring, and too middle of the road. At dusk, it’s too dark for everyone to see the witty banners and zany costumes you’ve made

“A good protest should never be held at dusk. That’s just too grey, too boring, and too middle of the road” isn’t an area of expertise confined solely to Irish farmers either; across Europe, their brethren are sweating milk and tears for the agricultural cause. With huge cuts in funding destroying what

to legitimise your cause. But at the same time, it’s still not dark enough to start lighting up the sky with a Molotov cocktail. As experts in trying to find low budget property, most students know the importance of location, location, location. This makes sense really: what use is a protest that no one’s around to see? How are people supposed to see how upset you are? Admit it: if the farmers had picketed the National Ploughing Championships, you would hardly have batted an eyelid. Protesting in your own backyard is not the done thing. Let’s be honest, destruction is often a by-product of protesting. It’s almost inevitable that, somewhere down the line, someone will set a car ablaze. And when they do, nobody wants to risk it being their own car going up in the name of justice, easier as it would make it to find a decent parking space. Let’s spare a thought for the poor farmer and the price you pay for your pint. Of course a run on the student bar was no revolution: a bit of a tantrum and a tussle, not a stampede. But what should we do about it? Let them eat cake, your writer says. The streets are flowing with milk and there’s not enough space in the bar for a beer.

“But after the hearty student protest at the bar on ‘Black Monday’ failed to even get a mention in the Metro, let alone on RTÉ News, would farmers actually be all that pushed about accepting our help? ”

29.09.09

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Clear Heads on Campus They’re young, in college, and enjoying every moment of it, but the worst thing these young people will have to worry about early on a Thursday morning is the prospect of a boring lecture. Cormac Duffy meets the students who say no to alcohol

ho likes to drink more than the Irish? Who of the Irish to drinks more than students? By this logic, Irish students should be amongst the world’s most dedicated drinkers. For the most part, this seems to be the case: the evidence is everywhere, but has probably been best seen by anyone who took a stroll through the Freshers’ Tent last week, where opportunities to drink were numerous and varying. Tired of your standard night at a club? Try wine with the French Society, or Hot Whiskey with the Kevin Barry Cumann. And if all this is too classy, you can always go with the unique institution that is UCD’s very own Dutch Soc. It doesn’t take much to see that alcohol is an inherent part of student culture. But like all rules, there are exceptions. Students do, from time to time, break the stereotype and abstain from alcohol during the time in college. I caught up with a few of these to see how their abstinence influenced their studies and their social life as well as their general perception of a very different approach to the college lifestyle. One of the core groups in UCD who abstain are members of the Islamic faith, represented on campus by the Islamic Society or ISOC. Muslims do not drink alcohol as it is forbidden by the Qur’an, but they see many other advantages, especially when it comes to buckling down to their coursework. “For starters, there’s no chance of a hangover,” remarks Shahid Omar, a Second Year Physiology student. “It’s also not a common thing for us to be going out all the time, so we can focus more on our work.” Anyone who has ever sat through a 9am lecture with a stinging hangover

will have little difficulty in grasping the accuracy of his observation. Muslim students were also open in discussing some of the problems that can accompany abstinence from alcohol. “At parties, we cannot drink, so we are asked about this [by those who do drink]. It’s quite hard to mix with them, to mingle with them” says Nur Nabila Jusoh, a Second Year Medicine student. But she doesn’t mind, and is anything but negative about her abstinence, saying “we still have fun, even though we don’t drink,” and seemed to have the whole Society in consensus with her. Of course, many students do not drink for secular reasons, both practical and personal. Christopher Cummins, an 18-year-old Trinity student who has never taken a drink in his life, is a perfect example of this. “The main reason I decide not to drink is my own experiences of when I was younger.” Cummins goes on to cite personal family difficulties which arose from alcohol abuse. These are the kinds of problems students often put to the back of their minds as they drink, ignoring the potential issues that arise from long term alcohol use, including dependencies, health problems and the strain it can put on personal lives. For Cummins. “drinking is embedded in our culture and encrypted in our minds at a very early age”. He thinks it is not just a large part of student culture, but of our whole culture. Despite this, he has found that most students have been tolerant of his abstinence, which, to him, is “a way of life [he hopes] others would understand”. The decision to stay way from alcohol was somewhat more straightforward for William Gillespie, a 21-year-old UCD student. William, in his final year

Maybe people who do drink study less, but I certainly don’t study more

of a History degree, explains that as an 18-year-old in Donegal, he simply wasn’t all that bothered about drinking. “I’ve tasted it, and decided ‘Nah, I don’t like it’. I would have been sitting with friends, watching a match or whatever, and decided ‘I’ll try that’… [but] I just didn’t like it. I’ve since been told that different types of alcohol taste different, but I’ll stick with my Coke. I haven’t touched it since.” William’s experience as a non-drinking student has been relatively free of the kind of peer pressure and difficulties student abstinence might instinctively bring to mind. “I wouldn’t be someone who’d tend to go out all the time anyway, so there’s not much pressure on me to drink. But when I do [go out], I tend to leave earlier, because after a certain time, people can get annoying when they’ve had a few.” He is cheerfully dismissive of any suggestion that socialising as a non-drinker might be a tortuous experience. “I enjoy

myself just as much if everyone else is drinking, I just might leave earlier. At home, it’s just me [who doesn’t drink], out of maybe five or six who might go out together. We’ll go to someone’s house first, they’ll have a few beers, and I’ll sit there drinking tea or whatever! It’s pretty normal – they’re still good craic because they’re my friends.” For Gillespie, the decision not to drink was, for him at least, not a particularly profound one. “It’s not something I’d tell people. It’s not that I wouldn’t tell them, but I just don’t care. [When I tell them I don’t drink], people always say ‘Oh, well done’. I just think, ‘Well, it’s not that hard’.” When it comes to the issue of whether or not avoiding alcohol makes any tangible difference to his academic performance, Gillespie is dubious. “It doesn’t make me perform any better, I don’t think. People would say ‘You must do really well in college’ and ‘you must have much more money’, but you

find other things to spend your money on. You still find other things to do. If you’re on your time off, you’re on your time off. Maybe people who do drink study less, but I certainly don’t study more.” One group with an established historical record of encouraging Irish abstinence from alcohol is the Pioneer Total Abstinence Association – its efforts still very much ongoing in 2009. The group’s CEO, Padraig Brady, spoke to The University Observer last week about the success or otherwise the organisation has had in attracting young people to its message of religious-inspired abstinence from alcohol. “Less than ten per cent of our membership would be in the 18-25 age group. I think there is always room for improvement. The Pioneers have a hard working Youth Group through which we would hope to continue attracting young people on an ongoing basis. We are currently planning to re-introduce Pioneer clubs to the university sector.” Brady provides his own analysis of the reasons that can cause young people to stay away from alcohol. “There are many factors that influence a young person’s relationship with alcohol. They can range from health, to cultural, to emotional and spiritual reasons. Abstention from alcohol is only one of the many choices young people can consider.” When it comes to the question of just how difficult or challenging that choice can be for a young person who makes it, Brady is cautious, but honest. “Abstaining from alcohol is a very personal experience for anyone who engages in it. Therefore the experience of the young person’s choice is as individual as their motivation behind making such a choice in the first place. It can range from being difficult to bringing relief.” Interestingly, the group has experienced a slight increase in interest from young people since the beginning of the current economic downturn. “If we use our e-mail system as one measure, then yes, since late 2008 we have been experiencing an increase in interest from young people.” For now, the students who’ve already made the decision to stay away from alcohol show no signs of changing their minds in the future. “I don’t see why I would [drink], really. I can’t see any reason to at this stage”, says Gillespie.

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29.09.09

FEATURES

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CSI Belfield

It appears almost to be one of UCD’s best-kept secrets, yet it has an international reputation second to none for helping thwart high-tech crime. Natalie Voorheis meets the men and women of UCD’s Centre for Cybercrime Investigation

he UCD Centre for Cybercrime Investigation has been operating since 2006, from the Computer Sciences Building with a staff of just seven, and a low profile on campus - with most of the student body oblivious to its existence. On the world stage, by contrast, this small centre is of huge importance, providing pioneering training and research in the field of digital forensics. UCD is the only university in Europe accrediting the training of law enforcement officers in computing and cybercrime investigation. Cheryl Baker is Centre Manager for the Cybercrime Investigation Unit, and explained to The University Observer how the Centre came into being. “We were asked to join a number of groups, the European Policing Organisation and the International Policing Organisation to help them set up accredited training, training programs for law enforcement that are qualified by the university.” Baker went on to speak about the ongoing initiatives in UCD. “Upstairs at the moment, I have 27 law enforcement officers from throughout Europe who just embarked last week on a Masters in Forensic Computing Cybercrime Investigation, sponsored by the

European Commission. This is the largest project that has ever been conducted in this area by the European Commission justice and home affairs department.” Officers take classes such as mobile phone forensics, internet investigations, malware investigations, wireless lands and voiceover IP. Graduates go on to fight organised criminals in fields such as child exploitation, internet and auction room frauds, network attacks against businesses, and so on. The Centre boosts graduates as high achievers in their field, one of the first being Assistant Director of the High-Tech Crime Sub-Directorate at Interpol. Interpol last year asked UCD to bring the training programme to India, where UCD staff trained a group of Indian officers in the field and gave them the skills to train other officers in their regions. Following the success of the Indian experiment, the programme was introduced in Cyprus, and UCD have been

asked to run a similar course in Damascus early next year. The Centre is a valuable tool used not only by law enforcement officers and organisations on continental Europe, but also by An Garda Síochana. The University Observer spoke to Detective Inspector Paul Gillen, Head of the Garda Computer Crimes Investigation Unit. DI Gillen flagged the Centre at UCD as being crucial in investigations of crimes, such as the PIN entry device fraud of 2008. The PIN entry devices that were seized in Ireland last year were brought

based on their appearance or behaviour. Each one of these disciples of knowledge must be cherished and nurtured to their full potential in a learning environment free of any kind of crude, insensitive profiling. Got all that? Right. Now, quickly, close the door and pull your chairs closer. Professor O’Malley – you keep watch outside. We haven’t got much time, and it’s already well in to the new college year. Notebooks and pens out, and follow what I have to say closely. Never again will you have to chair a tutorial unprepared for the assorted student life forms sprawled in front of you. Behold four of the usual suspects. ~

“… most years, there will be a girl in class who flashes her admiration and who asks for advice on her essays. What to do? Enjoy her! She’s a perk…” Sit back and wait for your picture to be downloaded from the faculty website and used as a dartboard cover by overexcited and rather cross students’ unions the length and breadth of the UK. Oh, and nearly every daily media outlet in the country as well. Still listening down at the back there? Good. Dear, oh dear, such a mess. At least the sorry episode might serve as a timely reminder to Dr Kealey’s counterparts here in the hallowed halls of UCD. After me, now. Students are not objects! They’re wonderful, worthy individuals who can’t be stereotyped, caricatured or categorised in any way

Image: Gavan Reilly

were able to disclose information to the police that we otherwise were unable to discover ourselves.” Dr Joe Carthy, Director of the Centre for Cybercrime Investigation in UCD, gave an example of the research topics undertaken by his Masters students. Most recently a student researched the usefulness of modern gaming consoles such as Microsoft’s Xbox 360, the Nintendo Wii, or Sony’ PlayStation 3 to aid criminals in cybercrime. “There have been some instances in the UK where criminals have used these devices to store child pornography and information about criminal activity. Typically many police officers might enter a crime scene, i.e. a criminal’s

“The Centre boosts graduates as high achievers in their field, one of the first being Assistant Director of the HighTech Crime Sub-Directorate at Interpol” to UCD, where scientists from here disassembled them. “These devices had been encrypted by the criminals. The scientists here were capable of decrypting those devices and

Learning Curves To the Dunce’s corner, that man! Or alternatively, savour an A+ for a comprehensive academic demonstration of how to put one’s carpet-slippered foot well and truly in one’s mouth. This is Dr Terence Kealey, by research background a clinical bio-chemist and Vice-Chancellor of Buckingham University in the UK. And this is Dr Kealey’s one-stop tutorial on how to cultivate national opprobrium, slur an otherwise respected academic career, and generally make the headlines for a multitude of reasons utterly unconnected to the (possibly) exciting field of clinical bio-chemistry. It goes a little something like this. Accept offer from Times Higher Education Magazine to write tongue in cheek entry on ‘Lust’ in fluffy ‘Seven Deadly Sins of the Academy’ start of semester piece. Dash said piece off. Ensure to spell-check and footnote. Confirm that piece includes leery advice to male lecturers along the lines of, oh, I don’t know, perhaps:

The UCD centre now investigates everyday consoles like the Nintendo Wii.

unrelated topic. Better safe than sorry though, eh?

1. The Teacher’s Pet My, you are keen, aren’t you? You’ve certainly done the reading for today, and spent a pain-staking hour in the library going over your immaculate notes from yesterday’s lecture. I’d say it’s even a safe bet you’ve already purchased the lecturer’s book, even though it’s only the first week of term. And no, I don’t mean the core text for the course – you already spent your summer taking notes on that. The other book. The one he published in 1991. On a completely

As a British academic hits the headlines for all the wrong reasons, Slightly Mollified offers some sage advice for UCD’s own pedagogues

Sigh. It’s beyond question that you have some interesting observations to offer about the influence of von Clausewitz’s military precepts on Prussian foreign policy of the 1860s. But, my God, do you really have to? Every week? Tonight, sling the satchel in to your locker and set off on your usual Friday night stroll. Keep going past the library though. Down at the end of the concourse, there’s a place called a Student Bar – you’ll know it as the place where you had lunch with the rest of the 5th Year debating team when you visited from Kilkenny for that L&H competition in 2006. Have a drink. Relax. From even a passing glance at you, there’ll be time enough for neurosis yet. 2. Too cool for school Story, man!

house, with the view of seizing material; a games console might be lying in a corner, and they might overlook the device on the basis that they felt that no information could be stored on it, whereas in point of fact, quite a few of these gaming devices can connect to the internet and can upload and download information to and from the internet. This [Masters student’s] job was to look at the area of games consoles on the market, to identify which among those devices could be use to access material on the internet, and what were their storage capabilities, so that we could effectively create a table of the characteristics of these devices that would be useful for law enforcement investigating various crimes.” The Centre is ambitious about its future. Baker reports that the Centre has “submitted a bid to the European Commission this year to create a centre of excellence here for training, education and research throughout Europe.”

sitting across from you. We just feel privileged you made it. You’ve even managed to discover that the Newman Building has classrooms upstairs, and isn’t the shapeless bungalow you always thought. Who said college could teach you nothing? Well, you did actually; you lump of useless, jogging pants covered musculature.

from a productive, reasonable member of society to… become teacher’s pet. See above. 4. Alternative Lifestyles? Yes, please. Ha, ha! I doff my donnish cap to you, young seeker of knowledge. Truly you have succeeded in displaying your uniqueness by your choice of black metal band t-shirt, scuffed combat boots and artfully distressed ponytail. You, that is, and the other three-dozen lank-haired, cretinous compatriots of yours clogging up the steps to the fire escapes in the Arts Block basement. Never mind, though. At least you can continue to occupy your tutorial seat with that practised expression of artsy disinterest and boredom. The Man and The System will never prevail in making you just another cog in the machine by forcing you to actually participate in an in-class discussion. Oh, wait, that’s right. You’re 21, and you’ve voluntarily elected to enrol yourself in a third-level course… no-one’s actually forcing you to be here. Wake up and smell the shampoo, Kurt.

“Mature students are not infrequently the campus equivalent of a hackneyed Hollywood Vietnam veteran – all they seem to lack sometimes is a thousand-yard stare and a supporting role in an Oliver Stone feature.”

Thanks a million for coming. It’s the second semester of your final year now, and true to that Heinekenaddled emotional chat you had with Fintan in Dicey’s last week, you really are starting to take it all seriously. Well done! This week, you’ve actually managed to amble into almost half of your scheduled tutorials. Whoa, nerdstrom – calm down there! Leave some learning for the rest of us! It’s quite all right that your contribution to class consists, in its entirety, of nervously clutching your plastic bottle of protein shake every time homework is mentioned and casting frequent, lustful glances at the peroxide-tipped princess

3. The Mature Student “I’ve been there man – I’ve seen it. I don’t want to go back.” Mature students are not infrequently the campus equivalent of a hackneyed Hollywood Vietnam veteran – all they seem to lack sometimes is a thousandyard stare and a supporting role in an Oliver Stone feature. Put simply, they’ve been there, done that, and learnt the lessons. Now they’re back to make something of themselves; and in the process to neatly transition

~ Now, purveyors of academic knowledge, scamper away to your leathervolume lined lairs and pay close heed to this cheat-sheet. Never again will you be caught unawares as you teach by the capricious meddling of an unkind Fate. Just be careful not to mention her tits in a national publication again.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

features@universityobserver.ie

Taboo

FEATURES

Just what does it take to get in to pornography – and get back out again? Veteran adult film actress Kay Taylor Parker talks to Peter Molloy about her own journey into porn and back

Features Editor Peter Molloy

ex World. The Seven Seductions. Intimate Lessons. Nasty Nurses. As bullet points from a professional resume go, they’re unquestionably eye-catching. Then again, so are entries slightly later on the list like Soul Splinter Identification and Retrieval, or How to Heal Shame – the Web of Unworthiness. But more on that later. Welcome to the striking career paths that have book-ended the working life of Kay Taylor Parker. Talking to her, Parker sounds nothing like the caricature of a brassy porn diva that springs to mind from a quick Wikipedia perusal of her filmography. Animatedly chatting down the line to Belfield from her home outside Los Angeles, the chirpy 65-year-old does a comprehensive job of demolishing most of the preconceptions I have about encountering a real-life porn star for the first time. Excitedly switching back and forth on topics ranging from the Woodstock Festival to the emergence of the internet, Parker’s warm, English-tinged US accent was reminiscent more of a favourite aunt at a stifling family function than a chesty Californian adult star. It’s probably appropriate though, because the Birmingham native and porn icon seems to have always had a foot on both sides of the fence. Born in England toward the end of the Second World War, Parker left for the United States midway though the 1960s. “It was one of those strange opportunities that was just handed to me – I had no previous aspirations of going over. [However], I somehow always knew I wouldn’t grow up past adolescence in England.” After following a fairly predictable emigrant trail that took her from New Mexico to California, Parker found herself in the midst of San Francisco and the tail end of the flower power era. “Once I arrived in San Francisco, there was no way I couldn’t be part of the scene – it was everywhere. It was a really amazing time.” By the late 1970s, the English arrival was past her 30th birthday, and had finally managed to escape the kind of 9-to-5 banking jobs that had initially supported her upon her arrival on America’s West Coast. “I ran this little store – it was a little shop that was just dripping with trinkets. I was in my element, because I’m very creative.” The next phase of Parker’s professional career, however, was to take that love of creativity to an altogether different place. After becoming involved with established porn actor John Leslie, she found herself auditioning for her very first part

in an X-rated film – a 1977 feature titled, with Ronseal simplicity, Sex World. At this point in Parker’s account, I couldn’t help but interrupt to ask the obvious question: how on earth does it feel to attend the mother and father of all nervous casting calls? “It took a while until I was actually sitting there, saying, ‘oh my God, I can’t believe that I’m getting ready to do this, on film’. It’s irreversible – once it’s done, it’s done. I almost left my body – I was in an altered state, I think – and then it was done.” Now here’s the thing. Ask people – especially males – about porn, and you’ll get a nearly universal reaction. I had my fill of almost identical conversations prior to talking to Taylor. Once the obligatory guffaws and nudge-nudge, wink-wink jokes about all the “research” for a feature on pornography have been dealt with, what’s left is a very tangible sense of curiosity. What’s it actually like? How does porn operate as a job choice? I wanted to see what kind of insight Taylor could offer about life in the industry. “I don’t know if there was ever a time [when] I could say I enjoyed it. From a sexual point of view, it’s never really enjoyable – it’s too technical, and it’s broken down into pieces, so it’s not a continuum. You’re not really able to get into the flow of things. But there were moments that were satisfying; [where] primarily because of the person I was working with, there was a beautiful exchange, and because of that you were able to portray something sensual and satisfying to watch. But the sexual part of shooting it is not an easy thing.” Parker’s heyday in the adult film industry during the late 1970s and early 80s coincided with the last years of a more traditional approach to pornographic film-making – one where even rudimentary storylines and acting took at least some precedence over the generic clips of by-the-numbers fleshy fumbling that dominate the market today. For all that though, taking a starring role on the flickering screens of the adult film theatres that proliferated in the US at the time didn’t necessarily translate to a glamorous, glossy working environment for Parker. “If you were a woman, and you were at the top of your game… you could demand a pretty high rate. I think at the peak, I was making $1500 a day. But the average time you spend on a film was two or three days: I was working as a waitress simultaneously just to pay my overheads.” So just how would an average day at the

Now here’s the thing. Ask people – especially males – about porn, and you’ll get a nearly universal reaction

office go for an established porn star? “[It] could be 24 hours straight. It’s exhausting work, really. The sexual stuff – unless it goes very smoothly – can take the longest, and be the most draining. [It] can make you quite ragged energetically, and you never really know how long you’re going to be there.” One of the unavoidable questions that raises its jealous little face when contemplating a working life in pornography is the impact it must surely have on personal relationships and family life. Put clinically; how can monogamous partnerships possibly work when one (or both) of those partners boasts a working day that involves multiple acts of filmed copulation? “My family didn’t know about it at the time. In terms of personal relationships, it added an interesting dynamic. When I did indulge in a relationship; I think for some of them, it was curious, and some of them were intrigued. I think they knew, though, that it wasn’t me. When you come down off the screen, you’re just a normal person – that was what they were engaging with.” Eventually, factors had coalesced by 1984 to convince Parker that her time as a doyenne of the porn industry had run its course. “There were primarily two reasons. One was AIDS – [it] became a reality, and a big factor. The other obvious thing was that by that point, video was a big reality. That meant low, low budgets, and it’s very difficult making the transition. I did one or two videos and said, ‘That’s it, I can’t do this anymore.’” It’s here that the other side to Kay Parker’s professional and personal life began to take over properly. Today, the bubbly ex-actress’s website describes her as a ‘counsellor, mediator and minister’. In person, Parker herself is more enlightening. “I call myself a spiritual mentor – I help people to understand why they’re here. I look at everything that would inhibit a person’s ability to know who they are – let’s put it that way.” Parker now runs her own spiritual counselling service, helping clients “discover more about themselves.” She pre-empts my predictable question by acknowledging that a significant proportion

of her male clients are – at least initially – attracted from curiosity about her past notoriety. At this point, a student journalist with ambitions of carving out a future niche in the cutting, snide print columns of modern media, should by reflex be preparing to ratchet up the sarcasm. But the inconvenient thing is, Parker is so charmingly, captivatingly sincere about who she is and what she does, that it’s hard to feel anything but a respectful curiosity. I wondered if she saw her current spiritual side as having developed in spite – or perhaps because of – her career

in pornography, or whether it had been a consistent theme. “It was always there, even from [when I was] a child. A lot of what I saw, and felt and experienced didn’t make sense. I can’t do these things that normal people do because I’m very sensitive.” When the dust has settled, what’s it like to reflect on a life of undeniable extremes? “I’m very pleased with myself – not in an egotistical way, but I know who I am.” There have to be worse ways to feel; a decade of painfully-punned film titles or not.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

COMMENT

comment@universityobserver.ie

TALLEYRAND Regimes may fall and fail, but I do not… Ach, a Dhia, táim tuirseach. No matter how hard Talleyrand wants to beat Belfield’s biggest and boldest over the head with the pallets left behind after another uninspiring Freshers’ Week, still the cretins swarm around the campus in their abhorrent fluorescent hues, feasting on the fresh meat of Freshers’ Week like dung beetles chasing a fresh batch of bullshit – in fact, exactly like dung beetles, getting drunk off their own heady aroma of total crap. Life on the Students’ Goonion corridor scrapheap hasn’t been kind to the hack hoardes this past fortnight. HRH (that’s His Royal Hackness) Gary Redmond has had to endure even more of Chief Welfairy Scrotal Ahearn’s incessant whimpering than usual, what with Scottie first demanding that a new batch of Welfare Shrew hoodies be ordered because the original shade of blue clashed with his eyes/arse/political hue/door sign/whatever, and then taking the huff at having to dress as a giant sperm for several whole minutes (yeah yeah, God love him). Apparently it was to celebrate some international Not-Having-AIDS day, or something equally pointless when the only people likely to spend a Friday afternoon in the Student Centre are the types who break out in violent rash and a chronic asthma attack at the faintest sight of a foreign bedpost. It’s not easy being green. Jester-in-Chief Mike Fat O’Donoghue, meanwhile, is letting the crippling financial successes of Fatman Scoop (fifty tickets sold), Felix da Housecat (twenty) and the heaving Friday Student Bar crowd (six bar staff, three students and a stray mountain goat) take its toll on his once impeccable physique. The handsome Cahirciveen bombshell – as MP is affectionately known by Stevie Wonder, Louis Braille and nobody else whatsoever – has thrown himself into the job/off the wall so hard that he’s started kipping in his intensely aromatic office, using beds of unsold Felix tickets for blankets. It’s a wonder he doesn’t suffocate, what with the smell of his new digs – think of the aforementioned dung beetles having an orgy – and the weight of the tickets bearing down on him, matched only in size by the enormous red hole swiftly appearing in the Ents bank statements. Nothing new there, then. As for Donnacha Ó Súilleabháin – well, he spends so much time telling anyone within earshot that he’s gotten UCD to put Internet! Explorer! 8! On every! Single! Computer! in the college, Talleyrand tuned out what feels like decades ago; and the fate of Paddy Who is unknown since even Redmond started failing to recognise him on the rare occasions he might show up in his office. Talleyrand wasn’t shocked, mind, to hear that three hundred students had sent in forms to run for Class Rep. Who wouldn’t want to get locked in a room in the arse end of Connacht somewhere for an entire weekend with Redmond et al trying to convince you that with your help, third level fees can be kept off the cabinet table for several whole minutes? Talleyrand for one, that’s who. Fortunately, TR’s kamikaze tendencies were diverted for a few short days by the silvery grace of Richard Butler and his mob of jacketed knobjockeys making sure that nothing – not even the jittery forklift that Talleyrand swears he’s never seen Silver Richie produce a licence for – can crash the party of Freshers’ Week. Apparently the Loveless & Hateful society conned nearly 5000 of you into thinking that €2 could guarantee you an intimate hour with Dame Edna? Talleyrand was sure you’d know better, though who could resist a society run by a podgy auditor who looks so fetching in his confirmation suit as Conor McAndrew? On that note, Talleyrand is sure he heard someone calling, somewhere else, a significant distance away. Thank fuck; now that Freshers’ Week is over, Talleyrand won’t have to lay eyes on Richard Butler for another eleven months – not unless the grey squirrel mysteriously kicks up a fuss about his new Student Centre playground being destined to forever remain a hole in the ground. Oh, wait… Talleyho,

Talleyrand

Quotes of the fortnight “Freedom is not something to be put on a jar in formaldehyde, stuck on a shelf to be genuflected before on Easter Monday” Chairman of Ireland for Europe, Pat Cox, dismisses Cóir’s Lisbon posters at the L&H’s Lisbon debate. No time to mock Libertas?

“Declan Ganley isn’t important enough to attack.” Ah. UCD’s Brigid Laffan sets the record straight.

“I didn’t come here, and neither did you, to be a kebab on Ganley’s sharpened spear I hope.” Pat Cox is on a strict Lisbon diet

“It will be designed to cause a regime of insecurity in staff” SIPTU’s Kieran Allen on compulsory redundancies proposed by UCD

“It could be 24 hours straight. It’s exhausting work really.”

“It’s cheap, you’re never late, and it stops you getting fat!” Prof. Danielle Clarke extols the virtues of cycling to UCD.

Former pornography actress Kay Taylor Parker shares her insights into the industry.

Where have all the boys gone? As postering in UCD is slowly suffocated by the drive for political correctness, Gavan Reilly asks why it’s only women who complain of being objectified

he past years in UCD have seen greater influence of female equality groups, fussing over imagery objectifying women as the sexual playthings of a male-orientated society. Demonstrations against the UCD heat of Miss University two years ago – the only heat to attract any clamour – are exemplary of the role the women’s movement has carved for itself in attacking objective portrayal of women on campus. While there are strong arguments to be made in its favour, there is one abhorrent aspect of the argument against suggestive posters. Some suggest that while posters depicting men in similarly evocative poses would be equally censored, the fact that such posters don’t exist indicates how the problem of sexual abstraction is exclusive to women. The issues of sexual objectivity and body image are inextricable – a case often put by those arguing for tighter control on what students are presented with while walking the Belfield concourse. Why should women, they argue, be confronted with sexually provocative poses of their contemporaries and have their own bodily insecurities confronted on such a regular basis? Their debate is certainly a reasonable one. However, there lies a fatal flaw to this reasoning. It seems to be the opinion of these people – who, let us not forget, represent the female equality movement and not merely the gender equality lobby – that it is only females who have needless hangups about their outward appearance and who worry themselves sick (sadly too literally) about the shapes and states of their bodies. The portrayal of women as a sexually loose, universally flaunty group within society is a stereotype that lobby groups fight to quash – but in doing so, these groups fall ultimately indulge in the same sexist rubbish they strive to eliminate. The argument perpetuated by equality groups is that men simply aren’t subject to the same type of objectification as women are. This is either extreme naivety

or a bare-faced lie: in advance of Freshers’ Week, a CTN recruitment poster, placed around campus simultaneous to the B&L and LawSoc posters later censored by the University, featured a male CTN presenter, six-pack and all, entirely naked – but for a branded television covering his private parts. Unlike the latter posters, though, no complaints were made against CTN, for either of two reasons – one, there was nobody on campus that found the poster offensive or incursive on healthy body image for men; or two, that nobody cared enough to report it. The poster remained largely anonymous, seemingly not registering on the moral compass of the PC police. Try to picture for a moment, in your own mind, a group of women at 10pm on a Saturday evening. What are they doing? What are they wearing? Are they wearing skimpy clothing, in a pub or bedroom getting ready to go out for the night? Now picture a group of men, the same age as the women, at 8pm on a Wednesday night. What are they doing? Likely wearing football jerseys in a pub or a living room, pint glass in hand, watching the Champions League. Both are reasonable images to have, but unlike the parallel image held against men, a prejudicial view of women is apparently rife for targeting, while men, it would appear, are believed to be as one-dimensional as the stereotype suggests. This is selectively true at best. Men have body image problems too; it is foolish and offensive to assume otherwise. Not all women spend their Saturday evenings dressing provocatively, preparing for sexual conquest; not all men swap alcoholic banter every time there’s football on a midweek evening. Stereotypes may not be earned without a degree of merit, but

nonetheless it is considered prejudicial to apply them universally. Why then do we have an attitude in UCD that women are universally up in arms about the prominence of sexually gratifying images of their kin on society posters? Either the women’s movement, chief cranks in the debate, have the unequivocal support of the female population – quite obviously not the case – or they wish to endorse another stereotype: that women are frail, helpless creatures incapable of defence against an oppressive, masculine society. Anointing themselves as soldiers of equality, intent on destroying the right of a woman to dress or act as she pleases, achieves nothing – and muffles the ability of their sisters to do as they please: a status any equality movement strives towards. Sexual objectification is not, and has never been, a female-only phenomenon. The difference is that there exists a women’s lobby assuming they represent the feelings of society at large, when this quite apparently isn’t the case. Let’s face facts. For every young woman who wishes her stomach were flatter, longing for the type of body that appears in men’s magazines, there’s a young man who wishes he had the chiselled jaw and leaner stomach needed to be featured in a women’s gossip mag. Men are under same peer pressure to conform to physical stereotype as women do; they just decline to share their concerns with their peers, or to become ambassadors for the embrace of a rounder gut. Either men need to form lobby groups as their female peers have done, or female lobby groups need to take a step back and realise how their petty mothering is destroying the rights of the sisterhood to do as they wish. The choice is one that UCD, and wider society, should waste no time in making.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

EDITORIAL

editor@universityobserver.ie

Editorial

Photo of the fortnight

29th September 2009

The revelation in this newspaper that not only may we have been overcharged on our Student Centre levy, but that the personal details we hand over to clubs and societies could be turned over to a third party without our consent, is a startling concern for all students in UCD. Our highest student decisionmaking power, the referendum, decried three years ago that the Student Centre levy would be index linked. And yet the result of that referendum appears to have been disregarded in the grab for more money. We’ve been overcharged on the Student Centre levy; whether through a genuine mistake or something more sinister remains to be seen. But it raises very serious concerns over the management of the University and begs the question: who can we actually trust in this University anymore? When we signed our names on the membership lists of our chosen clubs and societies, it was on the understanding that that information would go no further. And yet we have discovered that an outside business, at the same time,

was offering those clubs and societies a handsome reward for turning over our details. Whether any club or society accepted this offer is, and will likely remain, unknown and the societies office are keeping very quiet on the matter. Do we then have to rely solely on the integrity of our club captains and society auditors to protect our personal information? Is this to be the reward of studying in UCD, that students should leave with a solid sense of wariness, cynicism and distrust of those in authority? The societies office are silent on the topic, and those involved in the Student Centre dispute remain tight-lipped on the details also. It’s this attitude that instills in students an inherent distrust of those in positions of some power in this University. From the top down it is a fight for information, clarification and truth. While the Governing Authority are the highest power in the university, their meetings are reminiscent of a secret society, shrouded in cloaks and carrying daggers. Meeting behind closed doors

Letters to the Editor Letters should be sent by email to letters@universityobserver.ie or by mail to: The Editor, The University Observer, Student Centre, Belfield, Dublin 4 All letters are subject to editorial approval. The Editor reserves the right to edit any letters.

Lisbon Treaty Madam, Partnership is the key to the success of the European Union. Partnership means mutual obligations and respect. Thus, the other Member States listened to Irish concerns expressed during our first referendum on Lisbon. In return, now that our concerns have been met, we should take account of the fact that other member states, like us, want to approve the Lisbon Treaty, to bring in much-needed reforms to the EU.

Yours etc, Elva Crowley

Cutbacks in Film Studies Madam, I am writing to complain about what I feel has become an unbearable situation in Film Studies. While a small subject, Film Studies is part of one of the biggest schools in the college: English, Drama & Film Studies. I understand that UCD must make cutbacks, but to target small subjects as has happened recently is completely unfair.

The Masters in Film Production programme has been completely stopped, optional modules in the Film Studies Masters have been removed, and screenings for undergraduate students seem to be held in whatever theatre the UCD administration deems the most suitable. Second year screenings in Theatre P have been an exercise in futility, as emergency lights mean we cannot watch films in darkness. This means that distractions are constant and the film cannot be properly studied as it is supposed to be, as an academic text. Similarly, it is proving difficult to source certain films as they are not all available in the library. As films are essentially the core texts of our course, this is both unfair and makes further study incredibly difficult. I implore university authorities to halt what has already been incredibly detrimental to our learning experience. Film Studies has so far been an incredibly rewarding and interesting part of my college experience and further cutbacks could damage both the subject and the integrity of our degrees. Yours etc, Shaun Barry

C&E Iron Stomach 2009 winner Jonny Cosgrove pictured with runner-up Treasa Coleman, both in dire need of a shower... Photo: Catriona Laverty

to make some of the biggest decisions affecting students only compunds this distrust. Our student representatives, as elected by the student body can only stretch so far. And in this matter, should be commended for highlighting the impropriety

in the Student Centre levy. But in the quagmire that is the management structure of UCD, is it time we had a fulltime student representative to lobby for our interests rather than the one year quick change from President to President?

And should those clandestine meetings somewhere in the upper echelons or lower dungeons be opened up for the students to observe?

Contributors: Volume XVI, Issue 2 Editor Catriona Laverty Deputy Editor Gavan Reilly Art & Design Director Kristin McKnight otwo Editors Eoin Brady & Colin Sweetman News Editor Bridget Fitzsimons Comment Editor James Fagan Features Editor Peter Molloy Science & Health Editor Farouq Manji Sport Editor Killian Woods Film & TV Editor Conor Barry Fashion Editor Seán McGovern Image Editor Colin Scally

“It’s not stealing, it’s internal re-assignment”

Contributors

Special Thanks

Hugh Adler, Emma Alken, Agony Anto, The Badger, Westley Barnes, Amy Bracken, Louise Carney, Padraic Coffey, Fintan Collier, Alex Court, Sarah Doran, Cormac Duffy, Ciara Fitzpatrick, Matt Gregg, Sally Hayden, Jack HorganJones, Daniel Keenan, Fearghal Kerin, Laura Kinsella, Nicola Lyons, Ryan Mackenzie, Catherine Maguire, Michelle McCormick, Katie-Ann McDonagh, Mystic Mittens, Slightly Mollified, Conor Molumby, Kevin Mulligan, Shane Murphy, Jake O’Brien, Eimear O’Reilly, Martin Scanlon, Claire Slevin, Emer Sugrue, Talleyrand, Ekaterina Tikhoniouk, Selva Unal, Robert Upton, Natalie Voorheis

Jimmy Healy, Paul Murphy; Diarmuid McDermott, Shane McIntyre; Richard, Graham, Malcolm, Ian, Tim, Dave, Jonathan, Ade (and the robots) at Trafford Park Printing; Paul at Higgs; Eilis O’Brien and Dominic Martella; Colm, Claire, Rory and Danielle at MCD Promotions; Orla Breslin at Friction PR; Laura and Darren at Warner, Bernie Divilly at PIAS; Giselle Jiang; Dave Carmody; Dominic, Grace, Mark, Sandra, Charlie, Jason, Paul and all the Student Centre staff; Bombay Pantry, Dominos Pizza, Cadbury’s Shots, Lucozade Orange, Football Special, Lemsip Cough & Cold, Nurofen.

Photographers Emer Igbokwe, Katie-Ann McDonagh

Clarification & Apology In the Belfield Begins feature in our September 15, 2009 issue, we incorrectly stated that Conall Ó Morain was President of UCD Students’ Union in 1975. Mr Ó Morain enrolled in UCD in 1975, and served as SU President in 1977-1978. We are happy to clarify this and apologise for any confusion. It is the policy of The University Observer to rectify any errors as soon as they arise. Queries and clarifications can be addressed to info@universityobserver.ie.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

SCIENCE & HEALTH

science@universityobserver.ie

Cast into controversy: the dilemma of Caster Semenya Hugh Adler explores the gender issues surrounding embattled South African sprinter Caster Semenya and the world of international athletics

aster Semenya’s success in the women’s 800 metres world championships was thrown into controversy immediately after her victory last month, as observers suspected the 18-year-old South African of being a man. An Australian newspaper recently leaked the preliminary results of her gender verification tests, apparently stating that she has internal testes, and no womb or ovaries. A number of South African public officials – who really should know better – have since made increasingly provocative comments in the media, as have Semenya’s relatives. Sports journalists have been providing most of the coverage of this extremely complex topic, but have not always been entirely accurate. We will not know the definitive results of the tests – or whether Semenya will be allowed to keep her medal – until the International Association of Athletics Federations convenes in November. To begin, it is important to point out that “sex” and “gender” are not synonymous. ‘Gender’ is essentially a social concept, dealing with whether a person defines themselves as masculine or feminine. ‘Sex’ is biological – as a rule, if an individual has two X chromosomes, she is biologically female; if an X and a Y chromosome, he is male. This distinction may be considered pedantic, but the sex/gender concept is

important, particularly in the context of this debate. If the leaked report is true, Caster Semenya could be a person of the male sex. Her gender is still largely up to her – having lived as a woman her whole life, she can choose to remain a woman, whatever the medical report says. Many commentators have begun referring to Semenya as a hermaphrodite – this is not the correct term. True human hermaphrodites are exceptionally rare, and have both testes and ovaries. More common are pseudohermaphrodites – people who have the outward appearance of one sex, but the internal organs or genetic makeup of another.

‘Gender’ is essentially a social concept, dealing with whether a person defines themselves as masculine or feminine. ‘Sex’ is biological What gives rise to such individuals? In human development, the “default body type” is female – left to its own devices, every embryo will develop ovaries, a womb and a vagina. If the embryo is genetically male, then the Y chromosome allows the production of several

substances, including testosterone, which suppress the development of female organs and cause the embryo to develop testes and a penis. Rarely, problems can arise during this intricate process. One example of such a problem is Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (androgens are male hormones such as testosterone), occurring in one out of every 20,000 births. These people are genetically XY and hence produce testosterone, but their bodies can’t respond to it. Thus, during development they follow the “default” pathway and develop a vagina. However, the development of internal sexual organs – either testes or ovaries – is controlled by more than just testosterone; people with AIS still produce other male hormones, and these successfully suppress the womb and ovaries and induce the formation of testes, which remain concealed in the abdomen. Thus, these individuals look like women, but internally (and genetically) they are male. Interestingly, most experts recommend that they be considered female for the purpose of athletics competitions. This is just one of a number of complicated conditions which can blur the distinctions between male and female. Many of Semenya’s relatives have asserted that, since they changed her nappies when she was a baby, they can swear that she is female. While they are undoubtedly sincere and well meaning, sex validation is unfortunately more complex than that. Controversies of this nature first arose in the 1960s, when Soviet-bloc countries entered athletes who were biologically male, into female competitions. In those days, screening tests simply consisted of a chromosome scan – is this athlete XX

or XY? Nowadays, a wide variety of tests and analyses can be conducted. The International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) does not require complicated screening tests or compulsory gender validation – in fact, its medical manual simply advises a “visual examination […] during the delivSemenya’s athletic future remains in doubt, while her own ery of a urine specisense of identity will have suffered no end men in the women’s manner that could end up causing her a doping control lot of pain. station.” Obviously, more sophisticated Semenya herself has maintained a tests can be requested if questions arise dignified silence during the whole affair, during a competition. saying “I see it all as a joke, it doesn’t South Africans are understandably upset me.” A South African fashion furious that their national heroine might magazine gave her a makeover and put be stripped of her medal – but their her on its cover – a much nicer gesture comments have been far from helpful. than anything done for her by governThe minister for sport went so far as to ment officials. threaten a third world war over the issue. Ethically, Semenya’s case is extremely (Clearly South Africa’s constitution contricky – there is no reason to suggest fers all manner of powers on the minister that she is guilty of deliberate wrongdofor sport; imagine if Martin Cullen could ing. All she ever wanted to do was to declare war on Ireland’s behalf.) run, but now her most intimate personal Meanwhile, the Youth League of details have become fodder for gossip the country’s ruling African National and speculation. Given the poor levels of Congress party stated that they “will awareness and understanding in South never accept the categorisation of Caster Africa of conditions like AIS – let’s face Semenya as a hermaphrodite, because it, most of the world’s population is in South Africa and the entire world of poorly informed when it comes to these sanity, such does not exist.” conditions – it seems likely that she While I don’t want to paint a picture never suspected she was anything but of South Africa as a backward, narrowfemale. Now she is at risk of stigma and minded nation, this inflammatory humiliation. rhetoric is incredibly insensitive. Caster Let her keep the medal, and leave her Semenya needs and deserves her nation’s alone. support, but this has been delivered in a

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

SCIENCE & HEALTH

science@universityobserver.ie

How really normal stuff works: Cars Farouq Manji explains the logic behind the humble automobile Science Editor Farouq Manji

trictly speaking, it is important to understand from the off that cars are female. They are strikingly similar to the fairer sex: they require regular maintenance and care, are often temperamental, and it seems newer models are increasingly, mind-blowingly complicated. Plus, they can cost a fortune. This is perhaps why men form such amorous bonds with our cars. Unlike the opposite sex, we eventually figure out how cars work, and a beautiful, storybook romance is born. There exists only one key for your car’s ignition, so to speak. Women of course form a strong camaraderie with their cars as well, but like two powerful, deadly organisms forming an alliance, there is a loveless agreement between them: to get to the shopping sale first, leaving carnage in their wake. That said, shouldn’t we understand our friend/lover better? What exactly happens under the hood of your car? There are several systems that work together to make a car

go. The first, and often most mysterious, is the motor. Imagine you put a lit firecracker into an empty Pringles jar, and shoved an empty Coke can on top. When the firecracker blows, the can would shoot out, and you’d probably spend some time in A&E. This is the general principle on which a motor works. In the motor block, a cylinder (the Pringles jar) exists with a piston inside (can). When a mixture of air and gasoline are ignited under the piston, it fires upward. A rod attached to the top of the piston spins a shaft, which eventually spins the wheels. Each piston does this several times a second. Now imagine if you had four cylinders in a row: the motor would have four times as much power! This is why we have 4, 6, and even 8 cylinder motors. A V8 is an 8-cylinder motor where the cylinders stick out of the block in a V shape. More cylinders mean more power. And men never overcompensate – there is no such thing.

Quite simple, really. The complicated part is the timing of when each cylinder fires. If they all fired at once, there would be a huge force on the shaft, but then as they all reset for another fire, the shaft would slow down. The result would be a slooow, fast!, sloooow, fast! motion of the car, over and over, on your way to the A&E with an aluminium Coke can lodged in your skull. To make things smooth, each piston fires one at a time, in a cycle. The higher you rev the motor, the faster each piston fires, and the faster the cycle – thus increasing your rounds per minute, i.e. your RPM. So now we have this spinning shaft: how does this translate to power at the wheels? It is transmitted through the transmission. The transmission essentially delivers the power of the motor to the wheels, but does it in a smart way. Imagine, if you will, a 40-stone Hilary Duff. She could probably push a dumptruck up a hill, but it would be impossible for her to run over 20 km/h. The first gear of your transmission acts the same way – from a standstill, you need to move your very heavy car forward; this is called torque. But as a result, you sacrifice top speed.

As you progress through the gears, your transmission acts less like Duff, and more like a long distance runner – a much higher top speed, but utterly unable to push a heavy object – so once you reach fifth gear, you can go very fast, but you can’t accelerate very quickly (as you could in first). This is the reason you can’t start your car in fifth gear! This brings us to the clutch, which plays an integral role in the relationship between motor and transmission. If you were to engage the motor straight into the transmission, you would be jamming an object travelling at over 2000 RPM into a stationary object. The engine would simply seize and die. This is actually what happens when you stall your car. Instead, the clutch acts as a method of ‘easing’ the motor into the transmission. When the clutch is engaged, the motor and transmission are completely apart. As you let go of the clutch, the two slowly come together, but timing is everything. If you let go too quickly, the motor engages with the transmission too fast, and you stall. When you want to switch gears, you activate the clutch – which pulls apart the motor and transmission – then change the gears, and release the clutch again, letting the motor re-engage. This is also why a clutch wears out over time: it absorbs the power of the motor so that the engagement of the motor and transmission is more gradual, and as a result takes quite a beating. Now let’s revisit the motor. Although its primary role is to transfer power to the wheels, it has a lot of other roles as well. Among these is providing power to the fan belt and alternator.

The alternator is a particularly important aspect of the engine. When it spins, it provides electricity to the car for the lights and radio, but also for the spark plugs in the motor. Spark plugs are what ‘spark’ the ignition of fuel to drive the piston. Without it, the car, and your tunes, will die. Since the motor is a constantly moving machine composed of metal, it becomes very hot due to friction. To remedy this, oil is used to lubricate the moving parts. Under such intense stress, bits of metal from the motor inevitably break off. The oil also breaks down, becoming less effective. This is why oil is changed regularly. To keep the motor from overheating, water or coolant is also run throughout the motor to absorb heat from its moving parts. This superheated fluid is sent to the ‘radiator’ to radiate the heat away, which is smartly placed in front of the car so when travelling forward, thus allowing wind can help scatter the heat. This effect is amplified by a large fan behind the radiator which is often driven by the motor, via a belt. The squealing you hear from old cars is often from the fan belt, the alternator belt, or the orange high-heeled Freshers trying to run off the road. And of course, some cars are prettier than others when it comes to the exterior. ‘Accessories’ such as spoilers (hair), exhaust tips (mini-skirts), rims (high-heels), and dice (earrings) all help to glamourise your baby. But at the end of the day, the knowledgeable will realise it’s what’s beneath the hood that counts and partly the junk in your trunk.

A Perfect Lie Ekaterina Tikhoniouk explores the causes of eating disorders and their effects on body and mind Throughout the ages, many women have wanted to have the ‘Perfect Body’. Every era has had its own idea of what the perfect female proportions are. The people of ancient Rome favoured thin, almost child-like women and Victorians idolized the small waist. On the other hand age-old cultures such as the ancient Greeks and Indians preferred bigger women; even in caveman days, a curvy figure was seen as a symbol of fertility. Another famous example was the ideals of painter Peter Paul Rubens. His paintings were filled with massive buxom ladies, believed to be the epitome of beauty in Renaissance Italy. Unfortunately our society is at the other end of the scale. The end of the last century saw an increasing obsession with slender, wraithlike models, whose skeletal figures have dominated the catwalks and billboards for the past three decades.

They continue to do so, although the tide is slowly turning with a growing emphasis on a healthier, curvier figure. The past few years have seen a great backlash against size zero. One of the most memorable motions was the ban of all underweight girls from the catwalk of Milan Fashion Week in 2007, after the deaths of two models from undernourishment. Despite many such developments, eating disorders are still very common. Statistics say that one in five women have, or have had, an eating disorder, and that four per cent of men are affected, although many cases continue to go unreported. Disproportionate dieting can be a serious health hazard, and in some instances can even cause death. In spite of this, the media surrounding famous actresses and celebrities has taught us that slenderness is beautiful, and that

“The more you diet, the more you become obsessed with food, checking the back of every packet to see how many calories you are eating”

A radical reduction in caloric intake is counter-productive in effective, long-term weight-loss. becoming thin is all that matters - health is not a concern. Instead of wanting to maintain a healthy lifestyle, the emphasis is on the amount of weight lost. Before starting a diet, you should stop and think about the toll that such crashcourses can have on your body and general wellbeing. When they embark on yet another ‘miracle’ diet, most people do not realise the tremendous physical and emotional damage that self-starvation inflicts, so they continue to diet, fast, and over-exercise. Excessive cases such as anorexia have dire physical effects. When the body doesn’t have enough nutrition, it goes into starvation mode. It slows down to conserve energy and basically begins to consume itself. As the self-starvation continues, the medical complications pile up. The immune system is battered, constant fatigue manifests, and the hair begins to thin, as the body isn’t even getting enough nutrients to sustain proper hair growth. Sufferers also report being constantly cold, as the body has too little fat left to keep itself warm. Severe side effects range from stunted growth, to damage to vital organs, to sometimes

death. Most people never reach that extreme of food-depravation, instead indulging in yo-yo dieting or skipping meals in an effort to slim down. Many are sucked into fad diet plans that promise instant results with little physical effort required. But these plans also have a taxing effect on our bodies, often causing weakness, headaches and insomnia. After repeated dieting attempts, the body starts to compensate by lowering its calorie usage, so in order to keep losing weight you must ingest fewer and fewer calories. Even skipping meals if you are lazy, or in a hurry, can be damaging. Constantly missing mealtimes means you are more likely to feel a lack of energy during the day and experience inability to concentrate for long periods of time. On top of all this, eating disorders have very unfortunate psychological effects on a person’s wellbeing, described by some as an unbreakable downwards spiral. Effects begin with feelings of low self-worth and inadequacy, which get worse as the disorder progresses. No matter how much weight is lost, it simply

isn’t enough. The more you diet, the more you become obsessed with food, checking the back of every packet to see how many calories you are eating. You develop the habit of comparing yourself to other people, a frame of mind in which self-esteem is based on how much you weigh and how thin you are. Most common is the misguided belief that losing weight will bring happiness and popularity, and it is reported that many diet in an attempt to feel good about themselves. But no amount of dieting can repair the negative self-image at the centre of this problem. For others, self-starvation is a way of regaining control over some aspect of their lives. Controlling what they eat alleviates their feelings of powerlessness, but this boost is very short-lived. In the long run, eating disorders only lead to emotional pain, isolation and depression. It is obvious that the adverse effects of these fads far outweigh the socalled ‘benefits’ of an overly skinny body, so we must start a trend towards valuing a healthy lifestyle and eliminate the idea that you have to be a walking coat-rack to be beautiful.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

SPORT

Here’s to another 125 years With Kerry and Kilkenny continuing to dominate, Martin Scanlon asks if provincial titles have a future decade has proved no different with all So Kilkenny and Kerry are victorious ten titles going to one of the ‘Big Three’. once more. The fact that in its 125th year, Undoubtedly their success is partially the GAA’s two marquee teams in both senior codes won All-Irelands again came contributable to the paucity of competition in a championship with only twelve as no real surprise. However, the recurcontenders on an annual basis, of which rent trend of champions in both football only half in any year could have genuine and hurling in the first decade of the aspirations of playing twenty-first century does leave quesKerry’s thirty-sixth in Croke Park come September. But why tion marks over title is arguably have the breakboth the continual throughs of the middevelopment of Gaelic an even greater 1990s – when Offaly, games and the structure of achievement than Clare and Wexford the Championships. the four-in-a-row climbed the steps of The Celtic Tiger era the Hogan Stand – was kind to the GAA. of Kilkenny when not been repeated? The problem of hoards of one considers the Kerry’s thirty-sixth young men emigrating title is arguably an was temporarily stymied, increased depth even greater achieveand the organisation’s of competition in ment than the fourfinances have swelled due in-a-row of Kilkenny to increased attendances, the football when one considers greater commercializachampionship the increased depth tion and the leasing of of competition in the Croke Park. This money football championship. Kerry’s record has genuinely filtered down and made an over the last ten years of five championimpact at all levels of the organisation. ships, three final losses and two semiFunding for the development of the final defeats is unrivalled. The ferocity games has risen massively, with the apof Tyrone and Armagh has been only a pointment of development officers in all stumbling block for the Kingdom. corners of the country – but why have so Their successes must, in part, be atfew counties failed to make a significant tributed to the wonderful generation of breakthrough at senior level this decade? players with which both counties have Kilkenny, along with Cork and Tipbeen blessed. However, this is not just a perary, have traditionally held a firm freak of nature. From the earliest ages, grip on the Liam McCarthy Cup and this

both counties emphasize heavily the basic skills, the bread and butter of the game – striking and fielding, often the difference in tight contests. This was highlighted in the football final where Cork’s forwards missed chance after chance, while Kerry wingback Tomás Ó Sé effortlessly stroked his two attempts straight over the bar. More must be done in other counties to emulate these playing skills that are often sacrificed at an early stage for the more immediate reward of stamina training. However, playing ability alone is seldom enough. Whereas in other counties, locals and players hope and pray for successful Septembers, in Kilkenny and Kerry, they expect this success. It is this insatiable demand that spurs the players on year after year. Defeat, even in the final, is often considered an embarrassment. Such expectation would be detrimental to most other counties, but familiarity with these “annual” occasions helps counter any potential nerves. The sight of the green and gold, or the black and amber, exposes inferiority complexes in otherwise confident opponents. The current provincial structure definitely benefits both. Kilkenny qualified for their semi-final after two victories, whereas the Munster football championship normally serves as a pre-season for the greater challenges of August and September. If by some geographic

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miracle, Kerry were transplanted to the Ulster Championship, this decade probably would not be remembered as a golden age in Kerry football. Likewise, if the Leinster Hurling Championship matched the intensity of Munster, the Cats would not be able to time their best performances for later in the summer. Modern amendments in the structure of both championships have favoured the stronger counties. With the introduction of the qualifier system into the football series, provincial championships are nearly universally acknowledged to have lost their importance. Some believe that losing early and coming through the back door can be much better preparation. A kind, early draw allows management regular competition to prepare their team and also avoids the unprof-

itably long rest periods of provincial finalists. It can even be said that Galway’s introduction to the Leinster Championship gave Kilkenny a sufficient challenge to prepare them for Tipperary’s onslaught in the final. The time has come to once and for all abandon the provincial championships in both hurling and football. An open draw should be made of all the teams, which can then either be placed in an early Champions League-style group phase followed by knock-out from the quarter-finals onward, or a straight knock-out tournament. Such a move will inevitably displease traditionalists, but will go a long way to ensure a balanced playing field.

Worry-ING future for F1? Flavio Briatore has a beautiful wife and enormous wealth: why isn’t he on top of the world? Fintan Collier explains The former managing director of the Renault Formula One team, Flavio Briatore, looked daunted as allegations of race fixing in the 2008 Singapore Grand Prix emerged. Former Renault driver Nelson Piquet Jr claimed he had been ordered to crash his car, in a bid to give then-teammate Fernando Alonso a clearer path to the chequered flag and to victory. Renault “will not dispute” the claims, surely a de facto admission of guilt. When the stakes are as high as they are in professional sports, it is no wonder that teams and sports people go to such lengths in order to get the competitive edge. Cheating occurs in many disciplines. From the Spanish paralympic basketball team in 2000 competing with ten players that weren’t disabled, to a Blades of Glory-style incident in which figure skater Tonya Harding hired someone to strike fellow competitor Nancy Kerrigan on the knee before the 1994 Winter Olympics. It seems foolish that competitors would go to such lengths to cheat when the risks outweigh the perceived advantage. Renault won the Grand Prix, but at what cost? Briatore, along with Director of Enginering Pat Symonds, helped develop the scheme that put Piquet’s life in danger. On turn 17 of lap 14, Piquet pressed hard on the throttle and let his car drift out, endangering his own life as well as those of fellow drivers and marshals, simply to ensure Alonso’s victory. Formula One’s governing body, the Federation Internationale de l’Automobile, have come under criticism for the soft punishments handed down to the involved parties. Renault were given a two-year suspended ban, which will commence after the 2011 season. The diluted penalty may be due to the FIA’s fear that a hefty fine would leave Renault unable to justify the

mammoth finances required to take part, and drive the team out of the sport, following the lead of BMW. Such measures have been rendered moot, however, with the news that Renault’s title sponsor, Dutch bank ING, have withdrawn their sponsorship with immediate effect. Briatore has been banned from F1 activities indefinitely, in what will be perceived as a major loss to Formula One. Briatore was one of the sport’s most highprofile figures, a staunch campaigner for the rights of the drivers, and consistently a colourful character. Symonds, for his part, has also been suspended from the sport, though only for five years. Piquet, who admitted to contributing to the scandal, claimed immunity from prosecution for his part in exposing the affair. Moreover, the industry will no doubt lose the support of their fans as the integrity of the sport comes under yet more scrutiny. This latest scandal adds to Lewis Hamilton’s deceit in withholding information earlier in the season, which led to him being docked championship points, and also the 2007 ‘Spygate 2’ debacle. After two decades in Formula One and a career which oversaw four world drivers’ titles, Briatore’s status as an international sporting tycoon could now face further repercussions. His ownership stake in Queen’s Park Rangers FC is also under threat; the Football League now consider him unable to pass a ‘fit and proper persons test’ in the aftermath of his F1 banishment. Overall it is Symonds, however, who has suffered the most in this scandal. He has lost the admiration of his peers in motor racing circles, and has to face the shame that ultimately comes from cheating. It is now up to the FIA to ensure that cheating and fraud are firmly stamped out, to ensure both the safety of the participants as well as a viable future for F1.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

SPORT

sport@universityobserver.ie

Irish provinces unaffected by high profile departures Following some big name losses for Leinster and Munster over the summer, Daniel Keenan looks at the new arrivals brought in to fill the gaps

fter the success of Leinster and Munster on various stages last year, it goes without saying that management and players alike need to ensure that their position is consolidated and Irish rugby can continue to progress. With the signing of Eoin Reddan, Jean de Villiers and Nathan Hines, Ireland’s club rugby stalwarts seem to have ably replaced the likes of Elsom, Tipoki and Whitaker, whilst strengthening at the same time. Former Wasps scrum half Eoin Reddan will be hoping to put his less-than-adequate performances in last year’s Guinness Premiership behind him with this move. Tipped to be the Lions scrum-half during the 2008 Six Nations Championship, he has since fallen behind Tomás O’Leary and Peter Stringer in the Ireland team. Much like Stringer, he is a commanding scrum half who keeps the forwards on their toes. His slow ball release at the breakdown can be frustrating, but he does like to feed it out to the backs, rather than going for the box-kick. He’s not afraid to run when the opportunity arises, and his piercing passes are the reason he wore the Number 9 shirt during the 2007 World Cup and 2008 Six Nations. The announcement of the signing of Reddan coincided with that of Scottish

forward Nathan Hines, brought in to fill the void left by Rocky Elsom, and to provide cover for the ageing Malcolm O’Kelly. Hines is a natural second row player, though he has shown capability of playing blindside flanker, and will probably do so regularly with Elsom having returned to Australia in search of a recall to the Wallabies. Hines certainly seems to be settling in well with the Heineken Cup Champions. A sturdy lineout has been a feature of Leinster’s play early this season, and Hines is certainly part of that. His commitment can never be questioned, as is shown in his aggression at the breakdown. To his discredit, however, he has a tendency to pick up yellow cards – and the occasional red – for his overzealous attempts to retrieve or keep the ball. Not to be out-manoeuvred by Leinster, Munster matched their rivals with the coup of South African centre Jean de Villiers. After performing well on his debut at the weekend, de Villiers looks like he will fit in perfectly to the Munster set up. The centre has developed a worldclass reputation with South Africa, after

Like the retired Rua Tipoki, de Villiers has an eye for the killer pass, as well as the skill and power to grab a few tries. He was solid – though not all together impressive – during the Lions tour in June, but played well during the Springboks victory in the Tri Nations. South Africa’s policy of not picking anyone playing rugby overseas will probably mean de Villiers won’t be around for long. He’s signed a one-year contract, and Munster will hope that he won’t follow in the footsteps of Leinster’s Rocky Elsom, and return home after only one season. He is sure to return to South Africa before the 2011 World Cup, where he could captain the Springboks in place of John Smit and Victor Matfield, both of whom are expected to retire before then. It would have to be said that Leinster’s most high-profile exit was that of charismatic fly half Felipe Contepomi. His departure to Toulon will be a big hit to the province’s title and cup aspirations. His replacement, Shaun Berne, from Bath has put in some good displays in the early part of the year, but there are questions whether he has the nerves to cope with the pressure that Contepomi thrived under.

Not to be out-manoeuvred by Leinster, Munster matched their rivals with the coup of South African centre Jean de Villiers scoring 18 tries in 54 appearances for the Springboks and being an integral part of Tri Nations winning teams.

End of the Quadropoly

The Badger

Ryan Giggs is a rubbish footballer, because The Badger says so

It has been a manic two weeks in the world of sport. Diving, cheating, scheming, more diving, inciting, and Renault F1 getting more stuck in a rut than Flavio Briatore into wonderbra models. The only stone left that seems unturned is the undoubted fact that Bolton Wanderers’ defender Zat Knight is an impersonator of a footballer, who in an incredible feat of illusion is conning Premiership managers into buying him. The ‘Ginger Mourinho’, Gary Megson, is the latest in a long line of gaffers who believe that the stringy centre back can ‘do a job’ for his gung-ho defensive side – though The Badger has seen worse players venture through the English leagues and Eurotrash’s top divisions, from Winston Bogarde to Eric Djemba (so good they named him twice) Djemba. The two-time England international, however, is way out of their league. It is always very embarrassing for clubs to splash the cash on a player from a fourth divison team somewhere in Honduras, having only seen cartoon reenactments of his play on an A4 notepad and a threesecond grainy clip on YouTube, only to figure out that the player is actually a plumber looking for work (or in Liverpool’s case, Lucas Leiva). In Scotland, however, the trade of deficient footballers is taken very seriously. Scotland even has an entire league system dedicated to giving rubbish players like Rafael Scheidt (the hint is in the name) and Kenny Miller jobs as footballers

over there. Local domestic coaches even stretch their passion for this strange fetish to the international stage, where they seem dedicated to seek out atrocious players like Chris Iwelumo who are allergic to scoring goals. However, it is depressing to chat about this ilk of player for too long. Funny yes, but talking about Ryan Giggs is much more satisfying. The reality in which Sir Alex can still call upon him at the slender age of 35 is beyond believable. It is hard to believe that in 2003, only six years ago, there was talk of Ryan Giggs being denied a contract extension at United and moving on. The Badger even remembers Big Sam Allardyce voicing his interest in adding the then ageing, now effervescent, Giggs to his Bolton team. Right now United fans are shrugging off the concept and tittering away to themselves that this never happened. However, seeing that miss of Giggs’ against Arsenal in the 5th Round of the 2003 FA Cup may jog their memories. After beating Sol Campbell and David Seaman, Giggs had a glorious chance to open the scoring, but managed to calmly chip the ball over the crossbar as United went on to lose. The ensuing weeks saw Giggs being focus of the Prawn Sandwich boo-boys until Djemba (twice the gem) Djemba arrived to put some perspective on the situation – leading the whole discussion back to the topic of rubbish players. Does this mean that Ryan Giggs is a rubbish footballer? It appears so.

Eoin Reddan will want to push for an Ireland spot

Football is a cruel business which changes quickly. At the start of this article Ryan Giggs was bang inform; now he is ranked amongst Winston Bogarde. Phil Brown could tell you all about football being a cruel sport: this time last year

he was capping off an impressive September with a win against Arsenal. This season he is watching a chuffed Fernando Torres walk away with the match ball. However, you can’t question his “things only get better” attitude. After seeing his side concede as many goals as they have scored this season, The Badger can tell Brown he is totally right, it cannot possibly get any worse. At the same time, Hull City are not going to get any better; so chin up Phil, your abject team is only going to continue conceding four, five and six goals every week and get relegated. It could be worse: you could be signing Eric Djemba Djemba’s paycheque. Don’t forget to join the Badger’s Fantasy Premier League minileague: the code is 548380-122022.

Shane Murphy assesses the challengers for that ever-lucrative fourth Champions League spot The start of another Premiership season brings the inevitable question of whether anyone can end the dominance of the Big Four and secure a coveted Champions League qualifying spot. Arsenal, Chelsea, Manchester United and Liverpool have more or less dominated the top four since the League’s inception. Predictions on which club might achieve this include the usual cast of Everton, Tottenham Hotspur and Aston Villa, who have been hovering around fourth spot for the past few seasons. It is Manchester City, however, who might provide the sternest challenge. After spending big this summer, the Citizens have put in an impressive start to the season, winning their first four games. Despite narrowly losing in a nail-biting derby the weekend before last, the manner of City’s defeat to their illustrious neighbours suggests that the men in sky blue can last the pace of a gruelling Premier League season. Despite having been decisively outplayed for much of the fixture, the game was still deadlocked at 3-3 in injury time, and probably would have ended this way had it not been for some debatable timekeeping. Some canny signings at the start of the season espoused by the imperious Shay Given, combined with big names like Carlos Tevez, have turned City

into formidable opponents. The fact that they were without two of their first team strikers, Robinho and Emmanuel Adebayor, and still scored three against an in-form United side at home, highlights the strength their squad possesses. Unlike last year, Tottenham have also had an impressive start to the season, winning their opening four fixtures. Despite having been second best to Chelsea in the recent derby, and being humbled by a ten-man Manchester United at home – a pair of results that would rock the confidence of any squad – their 5-0 drubbing of Burnley should banish any doubts that Spurs can maintain a fight for Champions League entry. However, the schizophrenic form of captain Robbie Keane – scoring four one week and none for a month afterward – suggests that Spurs may be bound for Europa League football next season. Everton’s start to the season has been disappointing and much of their campaign will depend on the form and fitness of Mikel Arteta and Tim Cahill.

The absence of Arteta is one of the key factors that explain their current poor form. However, with Arteta still on the sidelines, they will struggle with the loss of their creatively influential playmaker. Having also lost Joleon Lescott to Manchester City, and lacking the strength in depth that City possess, Everton will struggle to challenge. Aston Villa could be City’s biggest challengers for the coveted fourth spot. After a win over bitter rivals Birmingham, Villa seem to have gotten their season back on track after a wobbly start. However doubts persist, and last weekend’s scrappy loss to Blackburn does not augur well. The mood in the Villa camp has been soured by a training ground bust up between manager Martin O’Neill and Nigel Reo-Coker. Although Villa possesses a wealthy owner in American billionaire Randy Lerner, the tycoon seems unwilling to part with his fortune, leaving O’Neill hamstrung in the transfer market. Villa’s loss of talismanic captain Gareth Barry to City has also left a gaping hold in midfield that has yet to be filled. City will most likely put up the most significant challenge for the elusive fourth spot. With strength in depth, the ability to spend big in January and safe hands in Mark Hughes they are a good bet to end the quadropoly.

29.09.09

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

SPORT

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Dunne’s darker day As Bernard Dunne loses his world boxing crown, Gavan Reilly contemplates the poetic charm of Irish sporting life

s Bernard Dunne fell to his knees for a third time in the third round of his bout with Thai super bantamweight Poonsawat Kratingdaenggym, and later apologised to the O2 crowd for his disappointing display, spectators throughout Ireland and beyond fell into a bruised and dumbfounded silence. Only six short months ago, the country had rejoiced as Dunne clinically claimed the WBA title from Ricardo Cordoba, hours after Ireland had claimed a long-

overdue Six Nations and grand slam crown, cementing a legendary day for Irish sport. Such feelings of crestfallen devastation are sadly too regular in the world of Irish sport, but the puzzled and curious anticlimax felt by spectators at Dunne’s defeat is a potent and powerful reminder to all of us of just how intoxicated and fanatical we Irish are about our sports, and about our national heroes. It’s difficult to think of a country that has produced, for its size, so many worldbeaters in such wildly varying fields as

Bernard Dunne, seen here losing to Kiko Martinez, was evidently heartbroken by his defeat on Saturday

Ireland. Nor is it easy to imagine a country so emotionally tied to the outcomes of the sporting field; as emotionally entangled with the successes and failures of its athletic heroes as we are. In other countries, a major success is of course toasted, but rarely made cause for an impromptu national holiday. Not so in Ireland: March 21, 2009 became a mere extension of St Patrick’s Day as Hibernia toasted its champions of rugby and boxing. Sport has a miraculous and enviable power in the world: it unites across divides of all sorts, overcomes barriers of language and class, and acts as an incomparable leveller in society. In today’s trying times, sports role as mass social escapism is all the more valuable; Dunne’s words of disappointment at his inability to help lift Ireland out of its current emotional rut became all the more laden with genuine pathos as he remembered the family of the late Darren Sutherland. The lows in sporting life are low indeed, but it is these lows that make the successes that pinch sweeter. Dunne and his legions may feel groggy and disappointed this week, but the emotional troughs that sport brings us are the natural antimatter to the good times. Without evil, there would be no good; without disappointment and the occasional moments of despair, there would be no appreciation of the finer and happier moments of the season. Dunne is, of course, to be commiserated for his plucky display, but the sporting world will keep turning, and we Irish will continue to be held captive by its emotional charm until another brighter day emerges for the Dublin dynamo.

Caught in a Trap With Trapattoni signing on for another two years, Killian Woods questions how healthy Irish football might be come 2012 The efforts of Giovanni Trapattoni over the course of Ireland’s World Cup Qualifying campaign have reasserted Ireland’s place in international football. His coaching and management approach has redeveloped Ireland into an effective and hardworking side once again. But should chief executive of the FAI, John Delaney, really be looking to prolong Trapattoni’s stay as Irish manager? Trapattoni’s work with the national team has virtually assured the side of second position in its qualification group for the 2010 World Cup, inevitably setting up Ireland for a two-legged play-off with another European team to qualify for South Africa. Regardless of whether Ireland make the trip south, however, it would be in our long term interests to see Trapattoni move on, as his initial objective of restoring pride back in Irish football is accomplished. Like Ireland, many international teams have resorted to hiring high profile foreign managers in search of success. Indeed, the practice has been commonplace in Africa for some time now, with the likes

of Ghana and the Ivory Coast choosing Eastern European managers to lead their sides. However, African teams have found the trend hard to buck and now have become constantly reliant on hiring coaches from abroad. With Ireland continuing their association with Trapattoni, there is a possibility that our country could start to fall into the same trend. On paper, high profile managers look impressive and do earn respect of players whose appetite for international football has faded. But, when Ireland need to step up to the next level, these assurances are not enough. Trapattoni turning Ireland into a tight-knit team again has not been a tactical or management stroke of genius. Before the Steve Staunton era, Ireland were a potent team, tough to defeat both home and away. It could be said that under Trapattoni, we are merely back to where we were four years ago under Brian Kerr: one match away from a sec-

ond place finish in a World Cup qualifying group. What must also be addressed is the style of Trapattoni’s football. He has installed in Ireland a stereotypical Italian system, attempting to protect whatever result it has. Before rushing to thank John Delaney for signing up Trapattoni again, fans should reflect on whether they want another two years of unimaginative, sterile football. The extension of Trapattoni’s contract has been made

possible due to wealthy businessman and entrepreneur, Denis O’Brien. The generous contributions of the telecoms magnate mean that the FAI can match the €1.7m annual salary the former Italian national coach has been receiving. Riding Trapattoni’s wave of success is a dangerous path for Ireland to choose continuously. Questions need to be asked of where the Irish team will be at the end of his new contract.

Trapattoni’s new deal will keep him in the job until 2012

‘Fearghal’ on Sport Still without a decent name to his new column, Fearghal Kerin knows a team of champions when he sees them, though – as ever – he is hard to convince We now, finally, have a better idea of Manchester City’s credentials for this season, after they almost snuck a massive result at Old Trafford last week. It’s certainly impressive to repeatedly come back from a goal down against the thrice-in-a-row Champions of England and back-to-back Champions League finalists – though as the euphoria and headiness of the closing stages slowly pass, it should be remembered that City were completely and comprehensively outplayed for the entire second half. If it were not for a sublime moment of inspiration for their second, and a mistake from Rio Ferdinand worthy of You’ve Been Framed for their third, United would have been long out of sight. The manner of the defeat will certainly give them heart, and now that City have suffered their first defeat of the campaign, it will be interesting to see how they respond in the forthcoming league fixtures. As for Michael Owen, it was always likely to be the case when you allow one striker to leave for your city rivals for £30m and replace him with a freebie, that he would come up trumps on the biggest day of all. At Old Trafford at least, that invariably seems to be the case. In addition, it was no surprise to see Craig Bellamy getting involved at the end in an unfortunate incident striking a pitch-invading United supporter, although this can largely be dismissed as a routine case of the sh*thead hitting the fan. With another Tri Nations series drawing to a close, the fans that were committed enough to have perched themselves in front of Sky Sports at ungodly hours on Saturday mornings – to watch what largely results in the southern hemisphere’s trio of giants battering themselves stupid – will be happier with this year’s tournament than they were with last year’s protracted, inconsistent efforts. While I’m aware that there’s very little arguing with South Africa’s place at the top of world rugby at the moment, off the back of a dominating Tri Nations performance, a Lions series victory and the World Cup less than two years ago – for some reason, I’m still somewhat unconvinced of the Springboks’ true quality. Maybe it’s that their World Cup was won by beating only Argentina and England in the semi-final and final respectively, or that they barely beat yet another awfully managed Lions squad, that has me so mistrusting of their pedigree. Their domination of the set piece is, for me, an anomaly. Because of the supposed impregnability of the ‘Bok lineout, opposition sides seem to panic and try fancier tactics rather than just playing their normal game, and hand the advantage to the ‘Boks in the process. The same can be said in the scrum. John Smit is a poor, poor prop at international level, while Tendai Mta-

warira managed to become a world superstar and forge a reputation as a formidable scrummager in the first Lions test by destroying Phil Vickery, before throwing it all away and returning to type in the second game against Adam Jones. Of course, with the Springboks due in Croke Park in late November, we have a good opportunity to see the world champions first hand, and examine how the northern hemisphere’s de facto champions fare against them. In addition, we’ll get a prolonged viewing on Jean de Villiers – the so-called ‘Intercept King’ – when he lines out for Munster this year. Perhaps in a few months I’ll be forced to eat my words about the ‘Boks. Showing perhaps that it takes strange qualities to impress this columnist, Australia played some of the best rugby of this year’s Tri Nations. In Matt Giteau, Adam Ashley-Cooper and Berrick Barnes, the Wallabies boasted some of the series’ standout backs, while the injuries carried into the tournament by Rocky Elsom, sustained during his time with Leinster, meant that the Australian behemoth missed the opening fixtures and failed to hit full throttle throughout the rest of it. Lastly, the decision to finally add Argentina to the Tri Nations from 2012 onward should be welcomed. Ostensibly one of the world’s premier four teams (off the back of France 2007), they should be able to compete for the tournament, but in reality, it’s an opportunity for the Pumas to make the next step forward as a rugby playing nation. What can be said about the Kerry footballers that hasn’t already been said about Kilkenny? The lingering doubt for the Kingdom in the buildup to the All-Ireland Final was that they hadn’t beaten any special team this year, with a very average Meath side disposed of in the semi-final comparing infavourably to the performance Cork put in to eliminate Tyrone. We probably should have known better. What more adequate way is there for a team to prepare for a clash with serial Croke Park bottlers Cork than with Dublin, a team who who fail to understand the concept of home advantage? This Cork team will come again, however, as they contain an almost unique blend of power and youth that has been built over a succession of good (but not great) minor teams, each producing a couple of players that would go on to star on the Senior teams. Surely some time soon Cork will take the scalp of their equally irritating neighbours at Croke Park, with this side in particular looking to have the longevity to do it.

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER

29.09.09

SPORT

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Martin Scanlon worries about the future of the GAA provincial championships

OBSERVER

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Page 21

Another five goal romp for UCD UCD 5 Kildare County 0 UCD continue their pursuit of automatic promotion with another impressive display, watched by Ryan Mackenzie

CD confirmed their intention to make a swift return to the League of Ireland Premier Division last Friday evening, putting five past a woeful Kildare County side rooted to the bottom of the table. Hoping to take all three points from the encounter in order to keep second-placed Shelbourne at bay, UCD were utterly dominant against a Kildare side desperate simply to avoid a shocking result. The sides had already met twice this season, with UCD taking full points from each clash, 4-0 and 1-0 respectively. A Kildare win, in short, was never going to be in the pre-match script, and UCD ran out 5-0 winners in the coolest of fashions without ever looking threatened. The opening goal came after just five minutes, when a grave defensive error by Kildare defender Baba Issaka allowed UCD captain Ronan Finn through on goal. His attempt was saved by Kildare keeper Darren Kelly, who could only parry the ball into the welcoming feet of winger David McMillan, slotting it home from two feet away. McMillan doubled his tally just five minutes later, getting on the end of a superb cross to neatly tuck the ball away in the bottom corner first time. Much of the opening period was played solely in the visitors’ half, as the league leaders demonstarted exactly why they hold that honour. UCD bared down relentlessly on their opponents’ goal with a combination of clever and methodical play. The vast majority of UCD’s success came from the right wing, where right back and winger connected brilliantly to tear the Kildare midfield and defence apart. So effective was this attack that UCD manager Martin Russell temporarily switched his two wingers to help spread this dominance throughout the pitch. All the while, skipper Ronan Finn played the vital role of orchestrating the midfield, with a classy display of defensive prowess and link-up play.

Very little threat came from the visitors throughout the first third of the match, and it wasn’t until a well-guided free kick from the edge of the box glided just over the crossbar on 39 minutes that Kildare managed any real attempt on the Students’ goal. This chance was rapidly followed by some nicely-worked play leading to a scoring opportunity for the visitors just before half time, though the ball only found its away to the side netting from close range. Despite this newfound threat from the Thoroughbreds, any slim hopes of a comeback were swatted away just before the hour mark, when marksman Ciaran Kilduff scored a terrific half-volley, rocketing into the bottom corner of the Kildare goal. It was at this moment that Kilduff found his stride: he was almost in on goal again moments later, but was caught in two minds between whether to go for glory or square the ball to his teammate at the edge of the six-yard box. As a result, he executed neither. This error was avenged on 70, when a fantastic long-distance shot found its way through a forest of players in the Kildare box and into the tentative hands of the hard-worked Kelly, who again could only parry the ball onto the head of Kilduff. The UCD striker kept his composure to place the ball out of reach in the top corner and secure his brace. It was the untimely sending-off of Kildare’s Craig Purcell in the 73rd minute, after a rash and overly aggressive challenge left UCD’s David McMillan on his back, that proved to be the most controversial moment of the match. The dismissal was met with shock and bemusement from the spectators who responded largely with confused silence, while Purcell’s Kildare teammates protested desperately. To add salt to the wound, UCD completed the rout four minutes from time: Finn slotting home a delightful volley from a long corner kick which found him unmarked inside the opposition box.

UCD’s goalscoring form will be vital if the Students are to overcome Shelbourne next Friday Photo: Emer Igbokwe The three points see UCD maintain the top spot in the First Division on goal difference over Shelbourne – the Students are five goals clear, boasting the meanest defence in the division – while firmly pinning Kildare to the unenviable position of last place.

Fittingly, UCD will meet Shelbourne next Friday in what could prove to be a must-win for the college side if they are to realise their ambitions of hoisting the league trophy this season and earn a return to the top flight.

UCD and UL contest Ultimate-ly even affair A competitively contested friendly between UCD and UL is a good exhibit for Ultimate Frisbee, writes Killian Woods In temperate conditions in Belfield on Saturday, Ultimate Frisbee players from UCD and the University of Limerick contested an enjoyable and competitive friendly match. The atmosphere before the game was very relaxed, with there was a unique team spirit throughout the two squads. Ultimate Frisbee is not one of UCD’s most popular sports, though unlike most pre-conceptions, the game itself requires

huge stamina and a good sense of strategic positioning. The game moves at a fast pace with stops in play only for turnovers, which are given for dropping the frisbee or sending it out of bounds. Both sides used this match as a chance to show new members the ins-and-outs of the sport, and as an exhibition of the emerging and energetic game. After starting the afternoon with some team bonding between both squads, the brisk

and intriguing game began. Scoring in Ultimate Frisbee is simple, and similar to rugby or American Football: a point is scored when the Frisbee is cleanly caught within the opposition’s goal area. A player holding the Frisbee is not allowed to move, but their teammates are allowed to manoeuvre into position. UL raced into a 4-1 lead after ten minutes following some quick incisive play - but after stepping up their game, UCD

UCD 7 UL 7

forced Limerick to make the errors which allowed the home side to narrow the gap with some patient build-up play. The visitors regained composure midway through the game and again took the lead, only for UCD to pounce with two long-range scores. This clinical and competitive play left UCD two points ahead with only a few minutes to play. However, UCD failed to finish off their opponents and lost possession in attack-

ing positions, allowing two quick points from UL to draw the game.

UCD: Eoin Savage, Cian Ó Raghallaigh, Chris Dowler, Darragh Bourke, Padraig McMorrow, Ciaran Fagan, Naoise Ó Ciardha. Subs: Brooke Austin, Dominic Smith, Kevin Walsh, Elliot Isaac, Hunter Tuttle UL: Jim Heneaghan, Shane Austin, Daragh Kelleher, James Moore, Steven King, Patrick Hayden, Liam Anderson, Tom Matthews. Sub: Mike Hurley