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Extraordinary compassion. Unsurpassed expertise. Right where you are. Families often come to Catawba Regional Hospice craving simple-to-understand information about endof-life care: What can hospice do? Where do you start? What can you expect? How can hospice make things better? Most often, their wishes are for a loved one’s physical comfort, peace of mind, quality of life, and – when the time is right – easy passing. They want knowledgeable, encouraging people to support them along the way. They long for a balanced mix of medical expertise and heartfelt compassion. They yearn for confirmation that they’ve done things right and have given their loved one the best care possible at the appropriate time. They expect to hear the truth about what disease can take away and look forward to discovering the relief that exceptional care can bring. This is what CRH does. Catawba Regional Hospice seeks, above all else, to honor loved ones and to provide the care and support needed. At times, that comes through medication and therapies. At other times, it’s offered through conversation and an understanding presence. Folks can count on us to provide comfort throughout the journey, knowing that we’ve uplifted nearly 20,000 families during our 37 years of caring. In fact, Catawba Regional Hospice was established as one of North Carolina’s original three hospice providers in 1979, when formalized end-of-life care was in its early stages. We began as a small group of grassroots volunteers who came together to support families in our immediate community. Through the years, we learned more, grew more, and became a valued resource both locally and regionally. Thanks to our reputation for quality care and compassion, we were invited into neighboring towns and counties, and we accepted the call to help folks throughout the Catawba Valley. Currently, families and medical professionals in 10 counties count on CRH to comfort, uplift, and care for individuals challenged by advanced illness, readily entrusting their loved ones to our expertise. Let us know how we can help you. Kelly Sigmon Director of Communications
3975 Robinson Road Newton, NC 28658 828.466.0466, x2144 www.CatawbaRegionalHospice.org Privileged to serve 10 counties: Catawba, Alexander, Burke, Caldwell, Cleveland, Gaston, Iredell, Lincoln, McDowell, and Mecklenburg
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Director Molly Rice Hello. My name is Molly Rice and I’m the Director/Educator at the Tractor Shed Theatre at St. Stephens High School in Hickory, NC. We are an award-winning program known for our civic engagement work within our school and community. In 2010, we embarked on our very first civic engagement project called Reach Out. The Reach Out project helped women and children in need and led student-actors into the community to help raise awareness and funds. We collaborated with Safe Harbor Rescue Mission, Women’s Resource Center, Family Guidance Center, and The Children’s Advocacy and Protection Center to write original plays based on information the organizations supplied us with - usually real statistics and true life stories of abuse and domestic violence. We soon realized how using the arts to raise awareness was very important and meaningful work to all involved. Each year since, Fall Play Production Class research local charities and outreach programs in our community. We choose an organization to approach for possible collaboration. The student artists take field trips to facilities in hopes of gathering life stories of the participants and to learn about what the charities do to help those on the margin. We seek to give voices to those stories and use the creative arts to bring to the stage the heart of the charity. The project culminates into a performance open to the public and all proceeds go back to the organization. Our shows have included Ars Longa, Vita Brevis torch-bearing the life stories of elderly participants of Pace@Home (All-inclusive Care for the Elderly); Saying Grace: Stories from the Shelter in collaboration with Grace House Day Shelter for the homeless; Voices: Interpretive Art Based on the Life Stories of Abused and Neglected Children in Conjunction with Catawba Valley Guardian Ad Litem; and Help4Hope raising awareness to stamp out stigma surrounding mental health in league with Catawba Valley Behavioral Healthcare. Hospice has always been close to our heart and on our short list. We wanted to collaborate with Catawba Regional Hospice however, we needed to make sure that we were ready as a troupe to be able to see and understand death in a positive way. We invited Kelly Tate, Vice President of Community Outreach to come in and meet us. We were delighted that she accepted our invitation and came to Saint Stephens H.S. during our class. We told her of our passion in civic engagement and that we wanted to represent hospice through art. She was impressed and accepted on the spot. She has been an amazing guide through our beautiful journey in learning about hospice. We have all been touched by the caring hands that are hospice. We have been blessed to meet such amazing people - nurses, staff, volunteers, funders, patients, families, and bereaved loved ones. My students and I have been changed forever. We hope that our creative pieces can bring to the page and stage the heart of hospice. Special thanks to Kelly Tate, Kelly Sigmon, Lee Triplett, Teresa Watson and Oohsocrafti, Donna Scuffham, and Barger Printing. Find out more about our civic engagement work by visiting: www.catawbaschools.net/Page/7286 “Spending moments with another in earnest presence is one of the simple ways we can show unconditional love. It is the memories created from these impressions that survive after all else passes.” ― Molly Friedenfeld
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Meeting a Hospice Worker Pruella the Angel “When I met Pruella, it was as if I was meeting an angel. She had this beautiful spirit and this aura that I knew I had a connection with. She told us of the love she felt for her patients and how she came to hospice. Her mother died nineteen years ago before she could get to hospice. Eleven years ago she started working there. She sings with patients and prays with them. She guides them to the other side. She counsels the family members of patients who have passed on and mentors new workers. I hope to one day experience how much love she experiences every day. She smiles every day when she walks into a patient's room because she says “seeing them still smiling, warms my heart.” She sang for us like she sings for the patients. It was wonderful to know how much she cares. It was as if an angel had entered our lives. She was amazing to meet and an amazing person to learn about. I'm incredibly happy to know that Pruella exists.” - Olivia Howard “When I met Pruella she was so nice and welcoming. My mother was with us, and Pruella said that she had worked at hospice for eleven years. My mom called her an angel and asked if she could hug her because,”It’s not everyday you get to hug an angel.” Pruella took us to the Sun Room and she told us why she came to hospice in the first place. She came because, nineteen years ago, her mother died, but on the day her mother died people from hospice were supposed to come to her house. It was sad for me because I could not imagine going through that with my mother. Pruella also told us she sang to patients when they wanted her to, and she also prayed with patients. When Olivia asked what songs she sang Pruella showed us. When she started singing it was so sweet and heartwarming that I could only imagine how the patients and family members in hospice felt. She told us that this place was made by God and when she said that you could tell she really meant it.” - Sophie Triplett
Pruella (Spoken Word by Olivia Howard and Sophie Triplett) Both: This spoken word is dedicated to Pruella. Sophie: A worker at hospice and to her deceased mother and father. She sings to patients, prays with them, and helps them move on to the other side. Olivia: If we had to say what was most important about meeting her, it was learning how hospice is a source of love not just death. Both: Pruella Both: “And now these three remain: Sophie: faith, Olivia: hope Both: and love. Olivia But the greatest of these Both: is love” Sophie: Corinthians 13:13
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Both: 19 years ago, Olivia: my heart was cupped by the hands of God and lead me to this hopeful place. Sophie: But when my mother could not find her breathe, I found refuge with a Godsent home. Both: I found hospice. Both: 11 years ago, Sophie: I found my calling in this fortunate home. I started singing, praying, and I truly felt helpful. Olivia: I'll never forget when my smile grew larger and stayed there longer. Both: For I found God again in these walls. Both: 3 years ago, Olivia: my father again couldn't find his breathe. Sophie: So I knew to send him to this Godsent place. Both: Where happiness was waiting for him. Olivia: And all I know, is that love can triumph and give strength, hope and faith to us all. Sophie: For hospice Both: is love and hope Sophie: in an unfamiliar way. Olivia: Hugging me like an angel Sophie: and singing with strength and faith Both: that carries through to the other side. Olivia: Even though your loved ones will be left behind, they will be alright and they may join me. Sophie: If they do, I will guide them through every step it takes to make them feel what I have felt years ago Olivia: at this place that should be called Both: a blessing. Both: 11 years have passed Sophie: and I have watched people be held by angels and tell their loved ones to stay away. Olivia: But hospice is love, it brings strength, it's a true Godsent place. Both: You're safe with us. You're safe with me. Olivia: Corinthians 13:7 Sophie: Love never gives up, Olivia: never loses faith, Sophie: is always hopeful, Both: and endures through every circumstance.
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Meeting a Volunteer Saintly Sylvia “When I first walked into Catawba Regional Hospice, I immediately felt welcomed by the big smile on Sylvia Kanipe’s face. It was great to hear her tell us her story about volunteering. She decided in 2003, two years after her mother died, to retire from being a media specialist at Union Elementary School and begin volunteering for hospice. When she first started volunteering, she would go to patients’ houses and do home visits. Eventually, she had to stop because she became so close and connected with a patient who reminded her of her mom. When the patient died, she felt like she lost her mother all over again. However, even though she could not handle the emotion of home visits, she still wanted to volunteer. She now works in the lobby of Catawba Regional Hospice. She makes sure patients and visitors sign in and out and if someone does not know where to go, she will walk them to the right room. She keeps patients company when they are lonely. We asked her if she had a memorable moment at hospice. She told us the story of when they had a tornado warning and had to pull all the patients out in the hallway. Most of them slept through it.” - Shawna Ward “A few weeks ago I had a really special experience, I got to meet a volunteer at hospice. Walking into the space took me aback, it had the look of a fancy hotel. The atmosphere looked, felt, and smelt warm. We started talking with Sylvia Kanipe, one of the volunteers there. She told some really cool stories but one stuck out to me. She told us about the time an older patient wandered out of his room. She was at the front desk and the patient walked into the lobby. The way the lobby is designed makes it appear as though there is a small balcony high up on the wall, circling around the whole room. The patient thought that there were people up there and that it was an actual balcony. She said she had to handle the situation carefully and actually didn't mention to the patient that there weren't people there. She just let it be and walked him back to his room. Silvia works at the front desk, but don't let that deceive you. There's more to Silvia Kanipe than I initially thought. She answers phones and checks people in, but she also does more. One thing I remember her saying was that she does whatever she can to take the burden off of the nurses so they can do their job. She walks families to rooms if they can't find the room and she has conversations with the family. Patients aren't the only ones who need company, family members need it as well. They even have sort of “eating day” on the second and fourth Tuesday, 2:00pm to 4:00pm. The staff bring in cookies and treats, much of homemade. All in all it was definitely an eye opening experience and a good insight into the job and life of a volunteer.” - Darrious Barger “When I went to Catawba Regional Hospice, I had the unique experience of interviewing a volunteer named Sylvia Kanipe. She works at the front desk. One of the reasons Sylvia wanted to volunteer at hospice was to feel useful. Sylvia helps the nurses anyway she can and lifts any burdens she can. She also gets to work with patients. She helps them basically by being a friend. Sylvia will help a patient by helping their families through the tough time, or taking a patient on a stroll around the property. Sometimes all that is needed is an open ear and heart. Sylvia says she is “thankful to be enough”. She mentioned she always tries to keep things upbeat with the patients and the patients’ families, and tries not to give opinions unless asked for. After talking to her, her people skills were undeniable. When I would talk I felt like she listened with her whole self. Sylvia told me how hospice has made her a better listener as well as a deeper listener. As a result of her hard work Sylvia talked about how hospice makes her feel cherished. She told us the heartwarming story of how she helped a patient’s family member with all the
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paperwork needed to determine how to afford the care needed. The world is blessed to have people like Sylvia Kanipe and I am so glad I had the opportunity to speak with her.� - David Rubino
Volunteer (Spoken Word) Shawna: Grandpa David: Grandma Darrious: Dad David: When they have no one Darrious: When they need burdens lifted Shawna: When they just need someone to talk to All: Volunteer David & Darrious: Volunteer to make a difference Shawna: Be the difference Darrious: When I volunteer, I feel useful Shawna: Fulfilled David: Cherished Darrious: It's more to us than just checking people in and answering the phone Shawna: It's about making a change David: The thought that we can bring hope into the heart of a family Darrious: To help make sure a dad sees his son graduate Shawna: And for a woman to put her feet in the sand for the last time David: To be there for a patient's last moment All: Volunteer Darrious: Volunteer to see the smiles of a lonely patient as you read to them David & Shawna: Or to console a shaken family that may have no one else to talk to Shawna & Darrious It's about helping, being a rock for others to stand on, lifting burdens All: Volunteer All: Even a little bit of your time can change someone else's life forever
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Meeting a Donor Generous Johnnie “We actually had the opportunity to meet the man who has been Catawba Regional Hospice's biggest advocate. Kelly Tate had told us about how he was such a big part of the organization as a whole and how they were pretty much like family. Johnnie was very well known at the center, we could tell that he was very loved and appreciated by the workers there. She had also told us how Johnnie had a lot of money and had even donated the piece of land that the hospice center was built on. Hearing that had made us both excited to get to know this man and his backstory. We were very surprised to find out that this man had lived in a trailer right in front of the hospice center and meeting with him was such an inspirational experience. I'm glad that we got to talk to him in his own trailer because it just made things much more comfortable and easier to talk to him. Walking into Johnnie’s house, we had never felt more welcomed. We had never felt such a warm environment than what surrounded us on that day. Johnnie was quiet but we had never met such an big-hearted person. There Johnnie had told us about his wife and his experience in a hospice care center and how her death had gotten him involved with hospice. Before the hospice center was built, Johnnie had gotten numerous offers from people wanting to buy the land from him but he had kept turning down offers because he wanted the land to be peaceful and quiet so he did not like the idea of any apartments or anything like that because of fights and so on. Later on Johnnie would end up giving the land up for the hospice center. We felt that it was amazing that this man had been so generous to hospice and so humble as well, it was very touching for both of us. Johnnie was also very entertaining to talk to, he seemed to have quite the sense of humor and we loved every moment of it. He was definitely one who stood out from the crowd. We wish that there were more people like Johnnie in this world because it would be such a loving, kind environment. You could tell by the way he was speaking, he was more than welcome to have us in his home. His house just seemed to us like home. It might have not been the biggest house in the world, but it really meant a lot to him.� - Addi Whaley & Addie Ocasio
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Johnnie’s Humble Abode Recently we were given the privilege to talk to our friend Johnnie. Johnnie is a humble man. He does not take what he has for granted. In fact, Johnny lives in a small trailer down the hill in front of Catawba Regional Hospice.
His interest in hospice started when his wife died on November 18, 1991. Johnnie had money, yes, but he never for one second thought that he was better than anyone else because of it. It was used wisely and only for the right reasons but ever since the death of his wife he has been the biggest advocate and supporter for Catawba Regional Hospice. Everyday for lunch Johnnie goes up to the hospice house to eat. He knows that hospice will always be his second family and he never has anything bad to say about it.
Johnnie was given the opinion to sell his land to many people along the way but never thought it would suit their purpose. He did not want anything built that could cause chaos, fighting, or legal issues. What better place than for hospice? Johnnie is a religious man who believes that it is not being rich that makes you cruel, it is what you do with that money. He told us that there was a plan for this land all along and that God had had a plan for it. That plan, was hospice. He knew that hospice care was what kept his wife going longer than she would have than in any other place and they were very kind to her. We loved watching his eyes light up when he spoke of his wife. His eyes had that same sparkle for hospice.
If given the opportunity anyone would be honored to speak to Johnnie about his life, his love, and his appreciation for hospice. We are very blessed to have met such an honorable man.
(Storytelling by Addi & Addie)
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Meeting the Bereaved Our Time With Mr. Dawson “When we arrived at the Catawba Regional Hospice Center, we were not sure what to expect other than talking to a man about his deceased wife and our questions in hand. His name is Mr. Dawson and we all were settled in a meditation room in the facility where we began asking about his wife. He was a pretty quiet man but he did have a lot to say, even though he might not have been as comfortable talking to a couple of strangers when his wife only passed away in late 2015. He talked about his wife’s personality, how they met, all the work they did, and just doing everything together no matter what it was, either staying at home, chaperoning at events, or going to a football game. What we thought was very interesting about their relationship was that they have been the only people who ever dated each other, they have gone steady with each other for 61 years, and were married for 55 years. They met each other in bible school. He was 15 and she was 13. Throughout their life they worked hard and they were able to keep their family stable and spend time together. She got diagnosed with kidney cancer in 1998 and then went away until three years before she passed away. Mr. Dawson described his wife as the most unselfish human being and the kindest soul. She gave up college to start working when they had kids, while he went. He told us that she always worked and gave everything to family instead for herself. She never had really big interests except for reading at night, she also never had really big dreams, because they enjoyed having a simple life. He described her personality as very kind; she was always popular because she could make friends with almost anybody, she was very considerate for other people’s feelings, and hardly ever had any sort of a temper. He also mentioned that they both used to sing choir and help out within the church, but they never really believed what was taught. As they got older, they accepted the fact that they were more of humanists and realists rather than religious people. He also mentioned some of the good times they had, for instance doing a photoshoot modeling in their swimsuits and going on dates for their whole life. She also got to go to the a beach house for a ceremony. While she had hospice care at home, hospice provided them with any equipment and assistance they needed. Mr Dawson said they were wonderful. Hospice also helped her accomplish one last trip to the beach. They provided wheelchair assistance if needed and were able to get her into another beach house. After she passed, her husband really never had much to do. But he appreciated our visit with him and thanked us for listening to his story, and we thanked him for telling us. We discussed other topics such as college tuition. It was wonderful meeting Mr. Dawson and we were glad he could talk about such a sensitive topic and we walked out feeling good about the discussion we had, and gave us a lot to think about. Thank you Mr. Dawson for sharing your story with us.” - Anthony Badillo and Josh Killian
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Soul Mates Grief.
Grief. Its definition says deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone's death. But it's much more than that…
Grief is a part of life, a stage, a habit, a beautiful thing. Because without grief our body would never rest, our mind would never sleep, our heart would never heal… Grief at times is viewed as a negative thing, much like death, but without it, we can never grow as a human race. Our minds treat us like bait, reeling us into a trap thinking “we can't go on”. But you can, you can go on…
Always live. Before, and after death. Because if you do that there will be no regrets, take a step. Keep moving forward through life, keep fighting that fight because YOU… You will get through it. All of it. All the pain, and sorrow, and Grief…
Grief. Its definition says deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone's death. But to us, it means a lot more than that…. What’s there to do? Where’s there to go? Lost in this journey called life. I no longer have you as my roadside map or my guiding light. Cold mattresses used to provide comfort, but there is no more comfort, with spring locks digging in my side and the loneliness that is bearing inside me because of the fact that you are long gone. The last moments spent lying beside your bed and being on the coarse sand of the beach were some of the most amazing moments of my life. I love you and I miss you, to the only women I went steady with, and the women who sacrificed everything for family. And through grief “we did everything together”.
Together.
Together. Its definition says With or in proximity to another person or people. But it's much more than that…
Its sticking side by side, riding the long, happy, sad, joyful, humbling, ruthless journey of life. Together. Because without another individual, life can feel half empty, you'll feel an avalanche fall on top of you
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without the support of the skis to get you down that mountain of life. Whether you’re in NC, or Cali, or on the other side of the world. Stick together, because life will feel half empty without each other. Together. Its definition says with, or in proximity to another person or people. But to us, it means a lot more than that… Looking back at the simple life we had, you cared nothing for yourself, but insisted that every little thing in life should be given to others. Showing empathy for anyone, making friends with almost anybody, brings out that heart full of love and kindness. With work and obstacles in the way, there is not a complaint heard anywhere. This life is lived under the priority of family, the basis of which hard labor is paid off in success allowing hardly any time to spend for yourself, but always for the people who surround you. Being together was one thing that defined the absolute value of the relationship, no matter where we were or what we did. And through family “we did everything together” Love. Love. Its definition says an intense feeling of deep affection. But it means EXACTLY that…
Deep kindness, warmth, a loving heart. The ingredients of love between a man and a woman. When the connection between a couple sparks, the flame is hard to burn out. That flame, rises and rises and rises to the top. But it had to start at some point. What was the spark? What caused the flame to rise? Love always starts at some place, it always will. It can leave you in a standstill until, the end of time…
Love. It's definition says an intense feeling of deep affection, and it means exactly that… Youth is at its brightest when there is a glimpse into what is soon to come. A meeting between us changed the lives of our two beings.Talking and laughing, feeling the most sensational feeling of giddiness. Love was found at first sight and the first words spoken was like an introduction into a deep book that began this glorious adventure that I was about to endeavor in.This was the perfect girl that everyone wanted, but stuck around this one human being. This would be the woman that would be by my side for the rest of our existing lives. And through love “we did everything together”.
(Original Spoken Word and Monologue by Anthony & Josh)
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Meeting Family Members A Daughter’s Mother “I was honored to meet the daughter of a hospice member, and after speaking with her in depth about her love for her mother, I gathered many beautiful stories. I learned that her mother was a banker, she was a nurse, and she was a Christian. She attended church every Sunday, and never missed a day, which incidentally led her to meet her husband in youth group. He was the only person she ever dated, and they began dating when she was 14. She loved dancing and the movies. Her and her family spent a lot of time in their home dancing, and her and her siblings would spend whole days at the movie theatre. Her mother would give her loose change to buy movie tickets and food to eat. She was extremely intelligent, and felt that raising her children in a wholesome and loving home was the most important thing. Regardless of family dynamics, she felt that a safe and happy home, free of yelling and anger was the best place to raise children, and she followed that principle when it came to raising her own children. Among her children was her dog, and he was a very important part of her life. In fact, on one of her last good days, she was able to speak a full sentence, and that sentence was ‘How is little man?’, little man being her yorkie. She was diagnosed with bladder cancer, and was told that she had 6-12 months to live. She only made it 4 months. Towards the end of her time in hospice, she went downhill very rapidly. Perhaps one of the most striking memories that I gathered was that of the last good day, she was able to speak a full thought, and it was a very emotional one. ‘Are we going home?’ she asked her daughter, who replied ‘No mother, not unless you want to, but you are going home to God. You are going to Heaven to be with your creator and with daddy’. ‘Oh, ok. I like that. I think I want to do that.’ I was truly touched after hearing these stories about such a loving and wonderful woman, and the love her daughter expressed made me feel like I knew her mother myself.” - Kayla Staff “She told me about her mother and father and how much love they had for each other. They met when she was 14, and she was the only man she was ever with. Her daughter told me about how they went to different schools and how their schools had an intense rivalry, they had to sit on different sides of the gym even though they wanted to sit together. She especially loved the way that her father would sing to her, she said that he had the most beautiful voice that would uplift your soul. When he passed, her mother was never the same. Even though there was so much sadness about her mother being sick, she knew that if she did pass she would meet her one true love in Heaven and they could be happy together forever.” - Coleson Berlin “Personally I can say at times that I am materialistic, and if I were to spend the last moments of my life somewhere I would bring materialistic things like a cell phone, laptop, or a TV. When there's very little time left, it is useless to have those sort of items that do not go with you. This concept really changed my perspective on life and made me question my desire in gaining material items. All the patient wanted was every card she received from loved ones and her wedding ring and this really hit me hard. That all of the materials you collect in your lifetime really mean nothing and it's all about the moments and relationships that make this life worth living. I learned a beautiful lesson.” - Jackson Shoe
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A Mother’s Love
JacksonThe chilling last moments of life Can't even speak for the past 74 years.
ColesonThrough the trials, the tribulations, and the fears, Nothing could stop mother.
JacksonShe was strong, invincible even, with a razor sharp wit. Although she didn’t have much to give, she gave all she had.
ColesonShe loved with every inch of her body, With a heart that beat in ¾,moving her gracefully around the room.
Kayla (sings)Amazing grace how sweet the sound That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now I'm found. Was blind but now I see.
JacksonMother felt like decades had come and gone, But every second has it’s meaning. Her environment set such a low bar For what she could accomplish. Even when she couldn't take another step, The faith she always had, pushed her.
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ColesonI remember her telling me about the days at the movie theater, how she could spend the whole day there with just a few dollars. She told me a lot about her childhood and how happy it was. One time she even said that Elvis sang her, her favorite song, “Love me Tender”. When she would talk about her childhood, her face would light up and she would seem even happier than normal. She met my dad when she was 14 and he was the first and only guy she was ever with. When he passed, a big piece of her went with him and she was never the same after that. So on one of her last good days she asked me if we were going home and I said that she was going to go to Heaven and meet daddy in Heaven. After I said that, she smiled and said, (pause)
Coleson“Oh, okay”
Jackson and Coleson“I think I'll go there”.
Kayla (sings)Love me tender, Love me sweet, Never let me go. You have made my life complete And I love you so.
Love me tender, Love me true, All my dreams fulfilled. For my darling I love you And I always will.
(Original Spoken Word with Song)
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Meeting Those Who Receive Hospice Care Winding in Wisdom “Oliver and I had the absolute blessing to be allowed to go in and speak to a wonderful woman at hospice about her life. Meeting this woman made me immediately feel like I was friends with her in some past life. She began sharing amazing life stories. Memories spanning her twelve years traveling all around the United States as a truck driver with the story of her pulling a woman and her child out of a burning car being the highlight. She told us stories about being a mother of two and how her first job was making tires for trucks. She told us how her greatest passion in life was riding her horses. The woman told me about being an activist and how she doesn't understand how people don't believe in issues such as global warming. She wishes people would just open their eyes to see how badly we are killing our Earth. She's a beautiful woman who says that the biggest advice she can give to anyone would be to never lose sight of what humanity is and how much importance there is in having empathy and faith. I stood in her room winding in such wisdom. I’m forever grateful for the experience to do so.” - Kariey Smith
“The woman we met was such an interesting person to visit. She grew up on a farm. She loved taking care of all the animals but her favorite were the horses. She would raise them and compete with many others at horse shows and every once in awhile would race against her friends. She would go out and race against others for fun. She left the farm life and went to go on living her life as a truck driver who traveled across all of the United States. She was a very energetic woman and would tell us her stories with so much enthusiasm that it pulled our attention so much that I didn't have any other thoughts running through my mind but her voice. She has a small breathing problem but that did not stop her from telling us anything she wanted to. I thought she was brave when she told me that she stood up for people who were bullied. It was an honour to meet such a wonderful woman and I will never forget the time that I got to meet this beautiful person.” - Oliver Gonzalez
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Standing Up (An original monologue by Kariey Smith) Y'know I really didn't wake up this morning, look in the mirror and say to myself "I'm going to get in a fight today." But I did however, tell myself that I'm not going to let morons like him tell me what I can and cannot do with my life. If I want to drive a race car then I should be allowed to drive a race car, and y'know what? I'll ride a horse too and be better at both than any man ever could be. I'm tired of living in a "man's country" because dammit, it's my country too. So yes, I did punch him, and that guy last week, and that other guy the week before... but I won't apologize for standing up for what I believe in, the school system should appreciate that right? Isn't that what you people have been trying to teach us since we were young? Or is that only if you're a man? I wish all of this would stop. I'm done hearing that women are supposed to stay in the kitchen and only speak when spoken to. I'm really done being silent.
Hero (Storytelling by Oliver Gonzalez) I was told an amazing story by a patient at hospice where she and her boyfriend were driving their truck down the road and just minding their business. They were having a good chat when a car came out of nowhere and crashed into a wall head on. They were shocked at what just happened, but without hesitation they stopped their truck, got out of it, and quickly rushed over to the burning vehicle. They pulled out a mother and child out of the burning car before any fatal events could occur. The crazy thing was that there was a police officer nearby watching the whole thing without lending a hand or calling in backup until everything was done. She really wanted to go over there and give him a real beating. She was a hero in every sense of the word. She was unstoppable and even in the last moments that she is here gracing the Earth with, she wants me to know that I too should fight and stand up to those who put me down or hold me back. To learn to wear the cape.
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World War II Veteran “Even though we were not given the chance to speak to this man in person, Kelly Tate, Vice President of Community Outreach at Catawba Regional Hospice, sat with us and gave us his story. He had a wish that he never thought was possible. With the help of the We Honor Veterans Program, Catawba Regional Hospice was able to pull together to make this retired veteran’s dreams come true. While he was in war he had his rifle on him everyday for years so being away from it felt as if he was missing a piece of himself. His 1932 Chevrolet seemed to be his prized past possession. On his 95th birthday, his wish had came true. He was taken to an owner of a car like the one he had and was taken for a ride. And he got to go to a shooting range and hold a rifle like his as well. He was so happy to see those things again! Kelly had even told us seeing how happy this had made the veteran had brought tears to her eyes. We both were very inspired and touched by how well everything came together and how it meant so much to everyone involved. It was a heartwarming story and if there was anything to take from it, it would be that dreams really can come true.” - Addi Whaley and Addie Ocasio
Hourglass (This Poem is dedicated to the World War II Veteran) Seeing childhood Stepping out onto the porch and seeing a dream as if childhood greeted you with open arms suddenly going back 75 years into the past on the front line fighting for your country with your rifle at your right hand side and being awarded for your time in battle bouncing back to the time to where you were sitting in your first car, a 1932 Chevrolet. Going out for a ride with your father, feeling the texture of the seats as if it were something out of this world . The times where memories like these seemed just like yesterday but passed in just a blink of an eye, being surrounded by people who are able to revive your earlier years and slow down the hourglass of life to celebrate your 95th year of living just to see you smile like a child on Christmas morning and loving every minute of it. Standing silently at the amazement of everything going on around you feeling as if you were on top of the world. Those moments are what help bring hope. What helps bring happiness to your soul. And what makes dreams come to life.
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Meeting a Hospice Home Patient Gift of Birds “When I first heard that I was going to meet a 23 year old woman with brain cancer, I was stunned. How could I speak to a person only six years older than myself about her experience with hospice care? Her situation was unimaginable to me. And along with that, I would be in her home, her own personal space. I was so honored, but terrified for this experience. I was told to not wear any perfume and to speak quietly, because her brain tumor might cause her to have a sensory overload and headaches if she hears or smells something too loud. I was told that although she was weak, she had a great spirit. When I went with Kelly Tate to meet the patient, we actually went to the wrong house at first, and had to turn around and drive a bit to find it. Luckily, it was just across the street. As a preface to this, when Kelly and I were at the hospice center about to leave, she showed me a bird feeder. She told me that a man in the center loved birds, so as a gift, the center was going to get him a bird feeder. The man had died just a day earlier. ‘So,’ Kelly said, ‘We're going to ask the patient we were going to see if she likes birds.’ So, when Kelly and I walked up to the door, her mother answered and welcomed us in. She invited us to sit in her living room as she went to wake up her daughter and see how she was doing that day. We sat and waited and got to meet the patient’s four year old brother. The patient’s mother came out and told us it was okay for us to see her. She was laying in her bed, on her side, unable to move. So Kelly and I just sat on the bed that was next to her so that we could face her when she talked. The very first-date-like question that I asked her was ‘So, what kind of music do you like?’ But from that, I was able to hear of her incredible faith. She said that she liked Christian music, of course, and continued to tell me how much she loved God and how her faith has gotten her through her whole life. Starting then and throughout our time together, she continually said ‘I just want Him to bring me home.’ You see, she has been a patient, receiving treatment and care for 16 years of her life. Her tumor went away for a while, but then came back just recently. She's been in hospice care only since October. This girl has been through a lot -- the unimaginable really. So, I completely understood her desire to go to a place where nothing bad happens to anyone, ever. She told us about visiting her family in the Philippines a few years ago, and begging God to bring her home then, surrounded by her loved ones. ‘But,’ she said sarcastically, ‘I guess he has something better planned.’ Her funny side began to come out more. By the things she said, you could tell she was not only trying to uplift herself, but everyone around her. Because she knows that her situation is sad, but that doesn't mean it should make others feel that way. I asked the patient more about her life. She told me that she had always wanted to be a nurse, so that she could give back to everyone who had cared for her. She even received her CNA when she was in high school.
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Kelly then asked the question: ‘So, do you like birds?’ And an immediate answer came: ‘Oh yeah, I love them!’ So Kelly went to the car to grab the gift as the patient continued to tell me why. She used to go and visit her family in New York every year. And she would go to Central Park with a book and a snack and just sit. And there would be birds that came by, and she would watch all the birds fly and scamper around looking for food. Kelly came back in with the bird feeder, and we all agreed that it could go outside of the window right in front of her bed, so that she could watch the birds every day. After that, the patient began to talk about her mother. ‘She's my hero,’ she said, ‘you know, right after God. Can't forget that guy.’ Her mother cares for her, and has been her rock throughout her entire life. Soon after that, it was time for Kelly and me to leave. We actually ended up staying much longer than I thought -- an hour and a half. She had amazing spirit and admirable faith that I could only dream of having in my life. It was such an honor to be able to talk to this amazing woman. One final thing you should know about her: she wrote poetry. So, I thought it only appropriate to write a spoken word poem. I can only hope that it can be as amazing as she is.” - Carson Gantt
Home Proverbs 31:35: “She is clothed with strength and dignity, And she laughs without fear of the future.” There will be a day when you can go home. Although you have been restrained, pulled down, Drowned by the tide of your own body, You will rise Like the sun in Central Park, surrounded by the birds rolling through the sky And strolling down the sidewalk, searching for their next feeder, Their sustenance. You will receive everything you need and more, One day. One day again you will hike through valleys, hill, plains, To the highest mountaintops and see the wondrous Beauty, glory, grandeur of something higher than this world. I pray that you continue to see the light you have spread throughout your life, And know how loved you are, and of your loveliness in return. Because the spirit and strength that shines in you, Even in your weakness, Spreads to everyone who crosses your path. You have no fear of the future, for you know that what lies ahead Is better than lying in your bed, dreading the pain of the day. There will be a day when you will finally go home. You will rise on sacred wings. You will be healed, You will be at home, At peace.
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Final Thought Some four years ago, I was involved in promoting a community service program initiated by Tractor Shed Theatre, the resident performing arts program at St. Stephens High School. The eminently imaginative students, led by theater instructor Molly Rice, were eager to translate the lives of PACE@Home participants (seniors enrolled in a program to keep them out of nursing homes) into art, adjusting, adapting, editing, and distilling information they gleaned from one-on-one interviews. It was a powerful experience for the PACE men and women to see their memories given new life and validation, invigorated by and made relevant to a group of high-schoolers who had the vision and the respect to lift up personal history as truth and legacy. The families of those profiled and those performing were awed by the collaboration, and our connected experiences as human beings, albeit representing different generations, were happily confirmed. The stakes have been raised with Tractor Shed’s latest efforts, which employ a similar creative process but showcase hospice patients, whose lives haven’t the expectancy of most. There’s an urgency to tease out the stories, transform decades-old recollections into act and scene, and present them as a gift of youthful vigor and gratitude. Even so, the task has been shouldered with determination and is delivered with finesse. For some patients, delving into distant memory is more rule than exception; for others, hewing to recent events is easier managed. Nevertheless, the resultant substance, refined and staged in a minimal environment with maximum impact, offers a bold witness that not only grants a measure of closure to a life but removes, if but briefly, the taint of disease, restoring potency to a person previously defined by uncertainty and waiting. Song, dance, spoken word, dialogue – the tools of awakening language – flesh out the tales. Patient and student, past and present, inspiration and realization, come together as at a fulcrum, momentarily balanced, until momentum wins out, propelling this hard-won craft, this artistry, this personal tribute into a future where it always continues forward. Ars longa, vita brevis, the aphorism claims. For many seasons, The Tractor Shed Theatre has worked metaphorically with this idea in mind, erecting a fortification against the onslaught of time and transience. With this latest set of performances, that age-old reality draws closer than ever. And for the patients and families who witness it bear fruit, a satisfying comfort comes just as near.
Kelly Sigmon Director of Communications Catawba Regional Hospice
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