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The Reader March 13 - 19, 2014

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AUTO 1 TOWING Tow Truck Driver. Contact Kim at auto1safety.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information.

OMAHA STEAKS Direct Sales Professional, full time evenings/days & part time evenings and Electrical Maintenance Mechanic. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. WEST ASSET MANAGEMENT Senior Network Engineer, Collections Supervisor, Collection Specialist, Care/Sales Associate. Go to OmahaJobs. com for more information. HUSKER SIDING & ROOFING Roofing Installation Manager. Contact Tom Allen at tom@ huskerhammer.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. BOYS TOWN Family-Teaching Couple. Contact Melissa Craig at 402-4981767 or Melissa.craig@boystown.org. Go to OmahaJobs. com for more information. ALEGENT HEALTH Clinic Office Specialist Adult Partial Hospitalization PT, RN Adult Partial Hospitalization IMC PT, RN Adult Partial Hospitalization IMC OnCall & Sur-

gical Services Project Specialist FT. Contact Jakob Hughes at jakob.hughtes@alegent. org. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. TIDE DRY CLEANERS Assistant General Manager. Contact Kimberley McCutcheon at jobs@tdcomaha.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. UMB Transaction Specialist. Contact Tim Fields at timothy. fields@umb.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. TOWNE PARK Valet Parking Attendant. Contact Sara Cottrell at scottrell@townepark.com Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. OMAHA STEAKS Freezer Assembler (PartTime). Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. COBANK SR. Relationship

Manager,

Leasing. Go to OmahaJobs. com for more information. ALEGENT HEALTH Driver II Bergan Mercy Medical Center FT Day/Evening. Contact Todd Molstad at todd. molstad@alegent.org. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. THE GROUNDSKEEPER Foreman/Laborer. Contact Todd Lewis at ponddoctor. todd@yahoo.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. OMAHA STEAKS Copy Writer. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. GRINDSTONE HARDSCAPES Foreman. Contact Josh Graczyk at metzbr@gmail.com or 308-440-9854. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. KANSAS WORKS All industries. Go to KansasWorks.com or come see us at the March 12, 2014 OmahaJobs.com Job Fair.

METROPOLITAN COMMUNITY COLLEGE Digital Instructional Designer. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information.

Services IMC FT. Contact Teri Prochaska @ teri.prochaska@alegent.org. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information.

BATH FITTER Sales Consultant. Contact Jerry Worth at jworth@omahabf. com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information.

HY-VEE Floral Designer, Certified Pharmacy Technician, Pharmacy Intern, . Contact Todd Lewis at ponddoctor.todd@ yahoo.com Go to OmahaJobs. com for more information.

J.A. KING Account Manager. Contact Marjie Troutman at marjie. troutman@jaking.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. CORESLAB STRUCTURES General Laborers, Carpenter, QA Inspector and a Mechanic. Contact Amanda Becker at abecker@coreslab.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. JENSEN GARDENS Landscape Foreman and Horticulturalist. Contact Sue at sue@jensengardens.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. ALEGENT CREIGHON HEALTH Supervisor-RN Maternal

CATHOLIC CHARITIES Therapist & U/A Program Asst./Data Specialist. Bonnie Pulte at bonniep@ccomaha. org. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. ALPINE ACADEMY Family Teachers. Contact Michele at mboguslofski@ alpineacademy.org. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. SNELLING STAFFING SERVICES See all listings at OmahaJobs. com for more information. OMAHA STEAKS Customer Acquisition Marketing Manager. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information.

BETTER LIVING, INC. Direct Support Professional. Contact Human Resources at onlineapp@bliconnect.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. GRINDSTONE HARDSCAPES Foreman. Contact Josh Graczyk at metzbr@gmail.com or 308-440-9854. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information. THE GOOD FEET STORE Assistant Manager for Sales. Contact Lisa at lisa@goodfeetmidwest.com. Go to OmahaJobs.com Job Fair for more information. PREMIUM RETAIL SERVICES Temporary, Daytime Reset. Contact Brittany Cotner at Brittany.cotner@premiumretail.com. Go to OmahaJobs. com for more information. CONVERGYS Inbound Customer Service Sales Agents. Go to OmahaJobs.com for more information.

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heartlandhealing N E W A G E H E A LT H A N D W E L L N E S S B Y M I C H A E L B R AU N S T E I N

You Are Eating Bug Killer

W

ould anyone ordinarily go to the basement or garage, grab a bottle of pesticide and chug it down? Didn’t think so. Most of those folks are under heavy sedation. But every time you go to the kitchen for a snack or eat a meal, you’re probably ingesting bug killer. The pesticide I’m describing is found in thousands of products and likely in whatever you might prepare for breakfast, lunch or dinner. And for sure, whenever you eat conventional processed food or soda, you’re getting dosed. The culprit is corn. And right now, corn or a derivative of it is in almost everything we eat. Bread, milk, pasta, pizza, salad dressing, yogurt, cookies, soup, ketchup, peanut butter, mayonnaise, hamburger patties — the list is virtually endless. And since corn’s now grown on almost every square inch of dirt in this country, it’s found in almost everything in the average American’s life. Don’t call it “maize” Make no mistake, what you see growing in the fields of the great Cornhusker State and all the vast reaches of our land is not the corn of our forefathers. It took less than a generation to replace our traditional corn with a new, toxic bug killer. What you see now isn’t food — until it is severely processed by one of the corporate agricultural giants. From them we get animal food, corn syrup, corn meal, cornstarch, the vitamin D added to your milk, adhesive on envelopes, aspirin coating, maltodextrin and of course, high fructose corn syrup and ethanol. Unfortunately, we get a lot more from them and most of it isn’t good. What’s most important for you to know is that the corn you drive by in the country (with corn prices so high, even those vacant lots in suburbia,) that corn is registered by law with the Environmental Protection Agency as a pesticide. That corn kills things. And there is enough suspicion it’s harmful to humans that we should pay attention. So what made the EPA tell the industry it had to register corn as a pesticide? It was the decision by Big Ag to develop and promote the use of genetically modified corn containing an artificially inserted gene from a bacterium known as Bacillus thuringiensis resulting in what is known as GMO Bt corn. Corn root worm is bad for corn. Bt bacteria kills corn root worm because

Bt creates a deadly toxin. By genetically modifying corn DNA, Big Ag turned corn into a poisonous plant. When a corn worm eats it, the worm dies. (Note: in a typical trump by Nature, insects are beginning to develop a resistance to Bt corn.) How Bt kills Genetically modifying the corn plant means that every single cell in the plant is now a miniature poison factory. Root, tassel, kernel, husks, stalks — every part of the plant produces the Bt toxin. When a worm munches on the corn, the toxin immediately binds to the bug’s gut. The bug stops eating within minutes and very shortly, the toxin eats through the gut wall and the bug dies. Sadly, less than 10 percent of the toxin is in the roots where it is needed against — wait for it — root worm. But all the rest of the plant contains the Bt toxin. And guess what? Now you do, too. Scientists found Bt toxin in the blood of 93 percent of subjects tested. 93 percent. And Big Ag has always contended that the toxin degrades in the human intestine. Apparently not. If it’s in the blood stream, it’s circulating to all the organs and the rest of the body. I bet the Bt toxin is doing exactly what Nature intended: attacking the gut wall of any animal ingesting it. Such a scenario in humans would mean ulcerative colitis or diverticulitis. It’s official The EPA looked at GMO corn and required companies to register Bt varieties as pesticides. But the EPA, though recognizing Bt toxin is poison, is not the agency trusted with safeguarding food. That’s left up to the USDA and the FDA. They have no problem with Bt corn and don’t warn us about the fact that we’re eating pesticide. Avoid and conquer Obviously, if one wants to avoid eating the pesticide growing in corn, decisions must be made. Is processed food, fast food, food prepared in ways and with ingredients you know nothing about worth the risk? It is not hard to avoid Bt products when we choose organic or whole foods. An apple, a squash, an eggplant or a carrot aren’t going to have Bt toxin in each cell. Remember, this Bt poison has only been prevalent in our diet for about ten years. We’re just beginning to realize the effects of this toxic experiment in which we are the guinea pigs. No one really knows what the final estimation will be. Bt toxin is bug killer. You’re eating it. Now you know. Eat better. If asked to voice an opinion about labeling GMO food, then act. “The end of all knowledge should be in virtuous action.” — Sir Philip Sydney Be well. ,

HEARTLAND HEALING is a New Age polemic describing alternatives to conventional methods

of healing the body, mind and planet. It is provided as information and entertainment, certainly not medical advice. It is not an endorsement of any particular therapy, either by the writer or The Reader. Visit HeartlandHealing.com for more information.

VISIONS FROM FIVE MINUTES INTO THE FUTURE • MARCH 13, 2014 • The traditional English breakfast is about to become a weekly part of the American diet. This meaty, fatty collection of breakfast foods, called a "fry up" and including eggs, sausage, black pudding, and a deep fried potato pancake called "bubbles and squeak,"

will find an audience in America looking for a decadent brunch to enjoy once per week (typically Sundays). Novel variations will quickly appear, including vegetarian and gluten free versions, but it will remain a deepAD 3: WEEK OF MAR fried, high calorie, delicious treat.

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MARCH 13 - 19, 2014

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O

h, the dark, mysterious stout. Some identify it as the base of a notoriously unwise cocktail known as the Irish car bomb. As if that’s not a bad enough impression, stouts — in particular dryer, Irish stouts like Guinness — picked up the nickname “liquid bread” somewhere along the line, making it sound like the beer would more likely lead to a nap than to a lively conversation. The stout is a “misunderstood style,” according to Zac Triemert, Brewmaster at the recently opened Borgata Brewery & Distillery in the Old Market. The big differentiator between stouts and other styles is that it uses roasted barley or malt hence the darker color. “People see

terized by a little caramel, a little coffee, and a fair amount of dark chocolate, with just a touch of roasted barley in the finish to round it out. Brewmaster Dallas Archer tells us the name is based on the Irish ballad “Danny Boy,” but that since Denny Hynek, Assistant Brewer, took the lead on this one, it only seemed fitting to make a play on it.

it as typically being heavy, high in alcohol, and something that after you have two you’ll be full. But most of the traditional stouts are quite low in alcohol and fairly drinkable,” Triemert says. He thinks the stout is a great session beer, one that “has interesting flavor and that you can drink all day — it’s a great combination.” While Borgata plans to offer two stouts — an Oatmeal Cream this spring, followed by a richer, more complex stout later on — other Omaha brewers are also helping shed the perception that dark beer is heavy. Both Upstream Brewing Company and Infusion Brewing Company have stouts on hand that fit the bill, while Benson Brewery is exploring a slightly different side of the stout, opting for a more intense, Imperial-style beer. Despite the misconceptions about dark beers, we know Omahans have a taste for stout. According to Larry Meader, general manager at Brazen Head Irish Pub, the bar sees a tremendous upswing in Guinness sales every St. Patrick’s Day weekend. “It’s almost a rite of passage,” he says, “that you at least have to try a Guinness.” Agreed. But while it is delicious, and Brazen Head is a great place to enjoy a pint or two, stout is not synonymous only with Guinness. Tour the town and take in some local brews this St. Patrick’s Day, too. Where to drink locally brewed stout this season:

since Aroma’s Coffeehouse is right next door, they didn’t have to look far for quality, cold pressed beans. The result from Brewmaster Andy Elliott is what’s known as an Imperial Coffee Cream Stout. “It’s a light-your-hair-on-fire version of the milk stout,” says co-owner Ryan Miller. While the notes of coffee, toffee, and chocolate are sure to delight, the relatively high alcohol by volume level lets you know this is a more complex beer to savor, not slam, on Paddy’s Day.

Benson Brewery (in collaboration with Aroma’s Coffeehouse) 6059 Maple St. Brewer’s Duet, 9.0% ABV

StoutItOut crumbs

n Not Too Late To Vote For Nebraska’s Best Burger: From now until March 15, visit www.nebeef.org and vote on your favorite burger in Nebraska. Sponsored by the Nebraska Beef Council, diners have a chance to weigh in on their favorite burger from across the state. Once the first round has been completed, a panel of judges will do their own taste test, putting together a list of Best Burger finalists. You will then have another opportunity to vote from March 15 through March 30 on the selected finalists to determine the overall winner of Best Burger in Nebraska. So get out there and vote away at nebeef.org. n Who Wouldn’t Want A Ride To And From A Bar? On Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays, Saint’s Pub in Midtown Crossing is offering free shuttle rides to and from its pub to any location within a five-mile radius. This shuttle runs from 9 p.m to 2 a.m. and did we mention it is free. All you have to do is contact the pub at 402.932.1911. n Looking For A Lenten Special? Try Dante Ristorante: Dante Ristorante will offer a Lenten special of Peroni beerbattered cod served with house potato fries and lemon aioli for $17 to kick off and run through out this Lenten season. In addition, Dante’s will run their full menu, including seafood and vegetarian dishes. To make a reservation, call 402-932-3078. — Krista O’Malley Crumbs is about indulging in food and celebrating its many forms. Send information about area food and drink businesses to crumbs@thereader.com.

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Upstream Brewing Company 514 S 11th St. and 17070 Wright Plaza Denny Boy Irish Stout, 5.0% ABV Debuting at both Upstream locations on St. Patrick’s Day, this Irish-style stout couldn’t be more festive. It’s infused with nitrogen instead of the typical carbon dioxide, giving it a soft and silky texture that cascades into a thick, creamy head. We hope the bartenders are brushing up on their beer head shamrock art for this one. The flavor is charac-

| THE READER |

dish

Up in Benson, collaboration is the name of the game. The brewery knew they wanted to make a coffee stout, and

Infusion Brewing Company 6115 Maple St. Maiden Voyage American Stout, 5% ABV Brewmaster Aaron Bush has been turning out a number of interesting stouts since opening in October. The Puddle Jumper Stout has a healthy load of extra hops, and the Sweet Elevation Crème Brûlée Stout is a rich, vanilla brew made in collaboration with Fort Collins’ Odell Brewing Company. The Maiden Voyage, however, is another one of those deliciously drinkable, wellrounded stouts, made with premium ingredients like crystal malt and midnight wheat. So called because it’s the first batch in the brewery’s newer, larger brewing system, this, like the others, is not a beer to be missed. ,

by rachel grace

Omaha brewers offer their versions of the original da r k b e e r this month


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| THE READER |

MARCH 13 - 19, 2014

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Bible, of which he displays a masterful command; the constitutions of the United States and Nebraska, with which he has an unrefuted familiarity; grammar, syntax and vocabulary in English; and those parts of American history which most did not learn in school, to name but a few areas displayed this year.

?

A

s the 103rd Nebraska Legislature tipped over the halfway mark of its short session, a haze of tentativeness seemed to hang in the hallways and hearing rooms at the Capitol. Exigent issues had not, at that point, dislodged the long-predicted targets of tax change and Medicaid expansion, known as “Wellness in Nebraska,” for the name of the proposal (LB887), as the big items that would seize the final days of the session coming in April. There had been 18 working days for the Legislature in February with multiple hearings before several committees filling the afternoon of every one of those days. Public hearings can make for very long days, no matter what the clock says. The Legislature as a whole shows extraordinary courtesy to all who come forward to speak on matters before them, although the decorum of individual

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senators may vary. Patience is required if each person who appears is to be given the attention their trip to the Capitol, preparation and courage deserves. And enduring the behavior of other senators may sap energy. Watching the Legislature on NET2 For observation of the full Legislature and floor debate, which in the first half of the session usually occurs only in the morning, The Reader turned sporadically to public television’s daily coverage on NET2 to keep an ear on legislative happenings. TV coverage is not exactly like watching paint dry. It is more like watching paint debate. It is, at least, punctuated frequently by the colloquy of Senator Ernie Chambers of Omaha who may hold forth on any topic, as required, incorporating references from the “Holly Bibble,” his name for the

| THE READER |

cover story

Wellness in Nebraska Whether Nebraska would close the hole blown in the Affordable Care Act (Obamacare) by the U.S. Supreme Court would remain unanswered until at least March 18 when the Legislature had scheduled floor debate on the Wellness in Nebraska Act. There had been an hours-long hearing on LB887 before the Health and Human Services Committee January 29. Lincoln Senator, Committee Chair and lead sponsor Kathy Campbell left the Chair’s seat to introduce the bill. She had to because the 32page measure was written in the kind of language scrutable only to longtime followers of public assistance policy. Campbell told the Committee that she had taken a lesson from the Legislature’s defeat of a simpler bill to simply expand existing Medicaid in 2013. She said she conducted “a thorough study of what’s happening in other states.” She told listeners that LB887 was not designed “just to get votes” but that it was “a more comprehensive bill that really does address good health policy.” The bill was intended to produce a “Medicaid expansion demonstration waiver” application to the Federal government. It envisioned assistance to 55,000 Nebraskans too poor to qualify for assistance in the current insurance “marketplace”—the one to which all the uproar about a bad website had been directed—and too well off for ordinary Medicaid. For those not covered now whose income is at 100 to 133 percent of the Federal Poverty Level, the bill proposed to buy a health insurance policy in the marketplace or, if possible, to pay the employee part of a workplace policy. Such people who were at zero to 100 percent of the poverty level, would be covered by Medicaid managed care, as well as any person from zero to 133 percent who is “medically frail or with an exceptional medical condition.” Incentives and sanctions for recipient behavior were also built into the bill—token premium payments that would be phased out for good behavior and penalties for improper use of emergency rooms, for instance. Some 29 people testified in favor of the bill, six of them individuals and the rest representatives of groups who work with or for uninsured people. Nine people appeared against the bill, three of them individuals and three of them representing the Heineman administration, including Kerry Winterer, Director of Health and Human Services, who would administer the bill, if passed.

The Preliminary Report and the Biennia Early in February the Appropriations Committee had issued its “Preliminary Report,” containing a financial projection of the State’s General Fund for the rest of the current biennial budget and for the following one. The state works in biennial (two-year) budget periods. This is fiscal year (FY) 2013-14, the first year of the biennium that will end in FY201415. The next biennial period will be FY2015-16 to FY2016-17. The “Preliminary Report” is supposed to help the Legislature plan as it adjusts spending for the second part of the current biennium and into the future. The ways to skin an appropriations cat

The Reader stopped by the Appropriations Committee on February 18 to observe hearings, not usually televised, as three senators offered bills responsive to testimony the Tax Modernization Committee had heard in its travels across Nebraska after the last session. At those hearings, people asked mostly for property tax relief. The committee reported this to the Legislature along with their recommendations. First up in the attractive and egalitarian hearing room where senators, testifiers and observers all sit at the same eye level—something rare in hearing rooms and a point of Nebraska pride--was Senator Beau McCoy. McCoy represents northwest Omaha District 39, a territory roughly north of Harrison Street, as far east as 180th in some places and 204th in others, all the way to the Douglas County border on the north and west. In 2013 McCoy brought forward a bill—and rapidly withdrew it--to eliminate income tax at the behest of Governor Dave Heineman whom he hopes to succeed as governor. Touting his closeness to Heineman this year in television commercials, McCoy, nonetheless, in 2014 is taking his guidance from the legislative report and is seeking a one-time transfer of $85 million from the State’s Reserve Fund to the Property Tax Credit Fund to beef up the rebate to property taxpayers through the state’s counties. (You may be able to find the current credit on your own property tax notice.) Senator McCoy Opens Senators customarily open the hearings on their own bills with a statement. McCoy opened the hearing on his LB669 citing national data that Nebraska had the “third highest property tax burden in the U.S.” Members of the Appropriations Committee then had a chance to ask him, as introducer, questions. Senator Danielle Conrad of Lincoln asked him what the average credit to a taxpayer would be under his plan. After some talking, McCoy said he thought it y continued on page 8


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y continued from page 6

leading to her assertion that his bill was two years of $115 million of additional spending. Pirsch said that he saw the source as “the people’s money in the cash reserve.” “What is appropriate for a cash reserve?” asked Conrad. Pirsch did not answer her question. Senator Davis Opens Finally, Senator Al Davis, the arts-loving rancher from Hyannis, appeared to introduce his LB1094 which would transfer $25 million from reserves to property tax credits. The modesty of his proposal prompted Omaha Senator John E. Nelson, a committee member, to tell Davis good naturedly, “You’re a piker!” comparing his bill to previous proposals. Davis said he thought his bill was “reasonable and sustainable.” Then he commented that increasing agricultural and declining residential values were really a bigger tax problem.

would be in “the mid $90’s.” Conrad asked him why he chose $85 million. McCoy said he thought it would create a real benefit and more than that would be a challenge for the state to handle. He said the Legislature was not far from having to deal with the issue of rapidly rising valuations of real property and added he had another bill (LB670) to reduce for tax purposes valuation of agricultural land that has skyrocketed in value lately. Conrad told McCoy that she had heard him argue against government spending many times. Yet, she told him, she saw this as a spending bill. McCoy told her he saw it as “returning overtaxing.” Senator Jeremy Nordquist of Omaha asked McCoy if restoring state aid to education would produce property tax reduction. Though there was discussion around the issue—with McCoy and other committee members -- no one was willing to give Nordquist a clear “yes.” Senator Kate Bolz of Omaha asked, somewhat rhetorically, if McCoy had considered what to say to people when property taxes go back up after onetime relief. Senator Pirsch Opens Second to present a property tax credit expansion bill funded from reserves that afternoon was another State executive office candidate, Senator Pete Pirsch, once an announced candidate for State Auditor but at this writing a candidate for State Attorney General. Pirsch represents Omaha District 4 which, to oversimplify, runs from 132nd to 180th and from Pacific to Maple with some additions, north and south. Pirsch opened his LB1086 saying he wanted to double the current property tax credit in 2014 and 2015 at a cost of $115 million each time for a total of $230 million. Again Senator Conrad asked a series of questions

Senator Harms Speaks Speaking generally, Committee Member Senator John Harms of Scottsbluff, said he was concerned about funding property tax relief from reserve funds in any amount. “We could fund this out of (removing income tax) exemptions, but that would take courage,” he said. He added that the Legislature could fund relief “now and forever” by fixing the public school funding formula. “I don’t think $85 million or $230 million gives anyone relief,” said Harms. “Senator Bolz is right. People will be back.” A representative of several agricultural producer groups spoke in favor of the bills as did a representative of Nebraska Taxpayers for Freedom. Open Sky Policy Institute Data Renee Fry appeared for the Open Sky Policy Institute to oppose the bills because they proposed use of Reserve Funds. Looking backward, Fry reminded the Committee that Nebraska entered the recent Great Recession in FY2008-09 with a healthy reserve of about 17 percent of the State’s General Fund, the minimum recommended by the Government Finance Officers Association. But the State needed the entire Reserve and federal stimulus funds which together equaled 24 percent of the General Fund to get by, even though it made cuts to schools and other services. In the recession prior to that, in the early 2000’s, Fry said, which hit when the State had cash reserves smaller than seven percent of the General Fund, the State was forced to raise taxes. Fry told the Committee the Reserve Fund stands at $679 million or 16.7 percent of the General Fund. The Open Sky Policy Institute recommends future reserves of $695 million at the end of FY2015; $728 million for FY2016; and $771 million for FY2017, based on projected General Fund levels. The following day, the Appropriation

Committee met in executive session, with doors closed to the public, as is customary, and voted all three bills out to the full Legislature. A Positive Forecast On February 28, the Nebraska Economic Forecast Advisory Board met to consider and adjust estimates of the amount of revenue the stateshould plan for. The board pushed the amount up somewhat, increasing by $63 million the imaginary amount of money the senators could expect in the General Fund. It happened that Open Sky Two days earlier had released an estimate of the total of spending bills that had been forwarded to the floor of the Legislature by all the Legislature’s committees on that date. The Institute’s total showed a mere $2 million in additional appropriations pending for the current year, FY13-14; but for FY14-15, a possible $43 million; for FY15-16, $53 million; and for FY16-17, $92 million. These are just the roughest of figures, of course, and only a starting place for discussion, weeding out, paring down and elimination. That is a lot of the work of the second half of the short session of the 103rd Legislature. The Effects of Term Limits Alive only in the memories of long-time observers of the Nebraska Legislators are the horsetrading citizen lawmakers who would have been busy dealing in and dealing out the issues that would survive beyond the mid-point and in what form. Those senators might have been making winnowing deals in quiet clusters in the Statehouse halls, in walking consultations, in certain select senator offices or in the bat-infested, fire-trap offices where none should have been and which are no more in the Capitol tower. Or after hours, such lawmakers might have been

seen in the restaurants and bistros of Lincoln, both high and low, honing down the body of business. It might sound sleazy but mostly it was not. Longserving elected senators were working with each other and their staff to make decisions. Compare Nebraska with any other state for its record of scandals and fraud to judge. Now the halls are mostly empty and senators are mostly missing from the social scene they once created near the Capitol. Senators, limited to no more than two consecutive four-year terms, may just be starting to get a feel for the long course of law making in Nebraska when their time is up. It is almost as if just at the moment when the best of them might prove useful to constituents, they must leave. For those who come with some comparative experience that allows them to gain a foothold quickly, there is an almost visible panic in the last couple of years as they strain to make even the tiniest part of the difference they came to make. For many others, sadness seems to engulf them. Meanwhile, the professional staff watches them come and go, training wave after wave of good citizens. The hand of the lobbyists grows stronger, whether they want it to or not. But one senses they miss the knowledgeable long termers who may have had more ways of talking back to them. As the era of term limits matures, some observers agree that the senator who leaves for four years and returns for a third, and perhaps a fourth term is as a sighted person in the land of the blind.

SEN. BEAU MCCOY

cover story

| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 2014

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Fun for the whole family! April 30 – May 4

Family fun-filled day of live entertainment, carnival rides, food, games, parade, booths & much more!

Parade

Saturday, May 3 10:00 AM

Fiesta & Exhibitors

Saturday, May 3 – Sunday, May 4 12:00 - 8:00 PM Register at www.CincodeMayoOmaha.com | info@cincodemayoomaha.com

| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 2014

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8 DAYS TOPTV CRISIS

Premiere March 16 Sunday, 9 p.m., NBC

An icy CEO (Gillian Anderson), a troubled exCIA analyst (Dermot Mulroney) and other D.C. parents drop off their kids at an elite high school for a field trip. Before long, the bus is ambushed by criminal masterminds who blackmail the well-connected parents to do their bidding. This could mean the end of the world as we know it, but there’s an even more pressing problem: How will the cool girl (Halston Sage), the disaffected girl (Stevie Lynn Jones) and the nerdy boy (Joshua Erenberg) get along in captivity? The gripping new series Crisis (Sunday, 9 p.m., NBC) skillfully manages its many cast members, giving each one a touch of characterization. The actors make you feel what’s at stake, whether family ties or personal redemption. The pilot features stratagems, fights to the death, kindness, cruelty and head-spinning twists. By the end of the hour I was a nervous wreck, wondering what I’d do if I were a hostage or a parent. In the midst of the ambush, a brave Secret Service agent (Lance Gross) yells at one of the blubbering kids: “You have to stop crying!” He couldn’t stop. And I wasn’t doing so well myself. –Dean Robbins

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T H E R E A D E R ’ S E N T E R TA I N M E N T P I C K S M A R C H 1 3 - 1 9 , 2 0 14

MARIJUANA DEATHSQUADS

TUESDAY 18

WEDNESDAY 19

THURSDAY 20

MARIJUANA DEATHSQUADS WITH LIZZO

THAT 1 GUY

ROCK ENROLL W/ROCK PAPER DYNAMITE AND CONCHANCE

The Waiting Room, 6212 Maple St., 9 p.m.; Tickets $10 www.onepercentproductions.com

Although the name Marijuana Deathsquads evokes a heavy metal or stoner rap-rock band, the Minneapolis-based group actually creates beautifully layered, electronic soundscapes with an unrelenting, infectious energy. Marijuana Deathsquads formed in 2009 out of the ashes of hardcore band, Building Better Bombs. Comprised of lead singer Isaac Gale, Stefon Alexander (better known as P.O.S. of Doomtree), Ryan Olson, Ben Ivascu, Mark McGee, Jeremy Nutzman, and Drew Christopherson. Marijuana Deathsquads is currently on tour in support of its latest effort, Oh My Sexy Lord. The album was put out last year by their own imprint, Totally Gross National Product, which Spin magazine called “ferocious” and described as fusing “jagged grooves, scratchy analog effects, and robo-warped vocals into a full-length, experimental freakout.” —Kyle Eustice

| THE READER |

picks

The Waiting Room, 6212 Maple St., 9 p.m.; Tickets $13 www.onepercentproductions.com Seeing That 1 Guy is similar to watching a conductor direct an orchestra, except the orchestra is comprised of just one person, you guessed it—That 1 Guy. Born Mike Silverman, the Las Vegas-based multi-instrumentalist has been performing since the 1990s when he developed a career in the progressive jazz scene. A classically trained double bass player, Silverman studied at the esteemed San Francisco Conservatory of Music. Eventually, after becoming frustrated for making music for other people and feeling rather limited by a single instrument, he started devising his own unique hybrid of several different instruments. Called the “Magic Pipe,” the device is a 7-foot-tall collection of steel plumbing pipes and joints, orchestral bass strings, and electronics. He also routinely plays the “Magic Saw” and “Magic Boot,” which he always constructed himself. Currently on tour in support of his sixth studio album, Poseidon’s Deep Water Adventure Friends, That 1 Guy makes a stop in Omaha this week. –Kyle Eustice

Slowdown 729 N. 14th St. 68102, 7 p.m., FREE www.theslowdown.com If you haven’t registered for health insurance yet in order to avoid a penalty you have until April 1 to do so. Not only is there still time to do this, but there’s time for you to rock out, have a drink and get your questions answered about the new healthcare plans. Rock Enroll is a free event at Slowdown that features three nonprofit organizations, two bands and one night all about Healthcare. Nebraska Appleseed, Hear Nebraska and Nebraska AIDS Project present this event beginning at 7 p.m. for drinks and conversation with Navigators to help you get covered and explain how you may qualify for financial assistance. After the conversation comes the fun part, Rock Paper Dynamite and Conchance will perform at 9 p.m. Rock Paper Dynamite. Nominated for two 2014 OEAA’s, Best Rock and Artist of the Year, this band will be sure to put your worries aside about healthcare and give you a chance to rock forward. Conchance is an indie two-time OEAA winner and was nominated Best Hip-Hop/ Rap for 2014. Attending this event will allow anyone who has questions to get answers, while also jamming away their worries with a few local favorites. –Mara Wilson


| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 2014

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mixedmedia coldcream Catch the Hubbub at Bemis ‘Flock House: Omaha’

The Rose’s “Broken Mirror” Reflects the Issues of Young Teen Women

March finally lived up to its promise of warmer weather, and along with it the Metro art scene has come out of hibernation with a very busy and diverse group of exhibits worth a look-see and some face time, even if you missed the openings.

■ While finishing up the run of Jackie and Me this week, The Rose Theater will present the latest offering from its Teens ‘N’ Theater program entitled Broken Mirror. The show will take a closer look at the issues facing Omaha’s teen girls by using skits, parodies, scenes, songs, dances and monologues to create an original work of theater that The Rose says “dares to break stereotypes and pose surprising questions”. Participants in Broken Mirror created the piece to reflect their own personal experiences. The teens not only perform in the show, but also write the segments included in the production. Topics addressed in the piece range from self-identity to double standards between men and women, from the pressures of growing up too quickly, to the impact of beauty as a commodity as the cast explores what it means to be young and female. Co-director Kathryn Stahl said “Each day when we arrived at rehearsal, we were impressed with the vulnerability these girls were willing to risk. They brought incredible insight about the pressures they face daily and how they empower themselves to carve out their space in the world. They are a truly inspirational group of young people.” Broken Mirror runs Thursday, March 13 at 7:00 pm, Saturday, March 15 at 7:30 pm and Saturday, March 16 at 4:30 pm in the Hitchcock Theater at The Rose at 20th and Farnam Street. For ticket information, call The Rose Theater Box Office at (402) 345-4849. ■ Omaha Performing Arts Broadway Series returns next week with the opening of Sister Act: The Musical, running March 18th - 23rd. Produced by Whoopi Goldberg, the show received five Tony Award nominations in 2011 including Best Musical, Best Original Score, and Best Book of a Musical. A musical adaptation of the classic 1992 film, the show tells the story of Deloris Van Cartier, a disco showgirl who witnesses a murder and is then placed in the protective custody of a convent. While in hiding, Cartier breathes new life into the church by revitalizing the convent’s choir. The show features an original score by Glenn Slater and multi-Academy, Tony, and Golden Globewinning composer Alan Menken. Menken is best known for his scores to films and musicals like The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Newsies, and many others. More information can be found at www.omahaperformingarts.com.

Reader’s dedicated group of fine and visual arts writers, Laura Vranes, Eddith Buis, Joel Damon and myself (Mary Day is currently in “hibernation” preparing for a summer show of her own at MONA in Kearney) will be covering the following shows in March either in online reviews or in this column along with other items: the Riley CAP show at Joslyn, iROZEALb, Lynn Piper at Modern Arts Midtown and Victoria Hoyt at RNG Gallery in Council Bluffs, all of which can be found at thereader.com. Additional exhibits worthy of your attention include Derrick Courtney at Sweatshop in Benson, Dundee Gallery’s 7th year anniversary exhibit, Jennie Homan at Sunderland Gallery, a special March Escape at the Artists’ Co-op Gallery in the Old Market and a very fine exhibit of new work by Christina Narwicz at Creighton’s Lied Gallery. But arguably the most significant exhibit on the radar opens this week at the Bemis Center for Contemporary Art. Mary Mattingly’s Flock House: Omaha opens this Thursday, Mar. 13 at 6 p.m. with an artist talk at 7 p.m. Bemis is no stranger to advocacy art and community building through hands-on developing artist projects and Flock House: Omaha will be no exception. Anyone who recalls past Bemis audience participation exhibits organized by former curator Hesse McGraw, such as (402) Dis Connect/Re Connect in 2009, understands the institution’s commitment to bringing artist and viewer together in an ongoing process for the benefit of all. The above was KC artist Matthew Dehaemer’s attempt to engage Omaha in it’s own telemarketing performance, scheme or stunt, and it worked on several levels. As Dehaemer told me in my review of this challenging, mindaltering installation, “The only thing I’m selling is Omaha.” Mattingly’s installation/project is even more ambitious as it purposes to create “a revolutionary urban living experience for Omaha” beginning with an active research hub in Bemis’ public gallery and a series of workshops in May. In June, Flock Houses will be installed outside Bemis and at the Carver Bank in North Omaha for local artists to inhabit as exemplars for “better urban living” just as Mattingly accomplished in New York City in 2012. The entire Flock House project culminates August 16—more on this in a later column or story-- but if you want in on the ground floor, catch the hub, bub opening this Thursday at 6 p.m. at Bemis.

Cold Cream looks at theater in the metro area. Email information to coldcream@thereader.com

--Michael J. Krainak

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MARCH 13 - 19, 2014

| THE READER |

mixed media


MIKE BIRBIGLIA THANK GOD FOR JOKES TOUR 2014

TO BE ANNOUNCED

Holland Performing Arts Center THURSDAY, MAY 15 7:30PM SHOW

FRIDAY JUNE 20 PINEWOOD BOWL THEATER

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| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 2014

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MARCH 13-19, 2014

| THE READER |


Ella, the dramatic musical revue of the life of American songbook diva Ella Fitzgerald at the Omaha Community Playhouse, reveals the anguish behind the legendary performer’s sweet voice and carefree persona. Call it kismet or karma, but the woman portraying her is veteran Omaha chanteuse Kathy Tyree, whose ebullient, easy-going public face has similarly disguised her own torment. The high points surely outweigh the low points in their respective lives but Tyree’s experienced, much as Ella did, her share of failed relationships, including two divorces, and myriad financial struggles. “I’m in a much better place now,” Tyree says. Known for her bright spirit and giving heart, Tyree’s usually worked a regular job to support her and her son. Currently, she’s program manager at Omaha Healthy Start. A few years ago she used all her savings and 401K to launch her own production company and after a rousing start one bad show broke the business. The enigmatic Fitzgerald died in 1996 at age 79 with few outside her inner circle knowing her private travails because her handlers sanitized her regal image as the First Lady of Song. As Tyree researched Fitzgerald’s life for the role, which director Susie Baer Collins offered without an audition, she identified with what Ella did to

separate, if not always reconcile, her private and public sides. “She was very weak and very strong at the same time,” Tyree says of Ella. “She had all these secrets and these hurts, all this internal pain, but she always held it together. She was at the top, she was international, she was the goddess of scat.” Fitzgerald was respected for her dignified demeanor, the purity of her well-modulated voice and her perfect elocution, though some criticized her for being too precise, too pristine, too white. All of it helped to popularize jazz. Tyree says the adoration that flowed Ella’s way was due to her talent but also to “how she carried herself as a black woman,” adding, “She wasn’t Lady Day (Billie Holiday), she wasn’t drinking and popping pills and going through all these changes publicly. That takes a lot.” Before getting the role Tyree was lukewarm about the singer. Her favorite female artists were Diana Ross, Patti Labelle and Cher. After months listening to the Ella canon, Tyree says, “I have a completely different appreciation for her. Now I am a fan. This woman was a walking instrument. She could do just amazing things with her voice.” Because the script peels back the layers of myth around Fitzgerald’s antiseptic image, Tyree now feels connected to the real woman behind the silky voice and prim and proper mask.

“There’s so much more to her than was allowed to be shared with the world. She definitely has a story, she definitely was singing from a place of pain. In rehearsals I began seeing a lot of the parallels between us.” Both grew up fatherless and both lost a sister. By their mid-teens both were mixed up in the wrong crowd. Just as performing saved Fitzgerald, it gave the “rebellious” Tyree a purpose and discipline she’d lacked. She began singing in church, at Morningstar Baptist, where she still attends today, and at Omaha Technical High School. Outside of her faith, performing is Tyree’s spiritual sanctuary. “For me theater and music are my therapy but from everything I’ve learned about Ella it was more like her drug. For me it takes me to another place and it gives me a peace and a calm. I leave everything outside. It’s like this is a whole other world.” Just as performing helped Tyree cope with insecurities, she guesses it did so for Ella, whose character in the show says, “I’m always OK when I’m on the stage. When I’m not working, I turn off, I get lost.” Tyree’s usual reticence about her own turmoil isn’t to protect a well-manufactured facade, but a personal credo she inherited. “I shared with Susie (Baer Collins) in a readthrough that in my family we have a rule – you never look like what you’re going through. Though I’ve been through a lot, I’ve had a lot of heartbreak and heartache, I never look like what I’m going through, and that was Ella. “It’s a pride thing. I was raised by strong black women. These women had to work hard. Nobody had time for that crying and whining stuff. It was, ‘Straighten your face up, get yourself together, keep it moving.’” She says what she doesn’t like about Ella is “the very same thing I don’t like in myself,” adding, “Ella didn’t have enough respect for herself to know what she deserved. She didn’t have those examples, she didn’t have a father. People always say little boys need their fathers, well little girls need their fathers. too. They need somebody to tell them they’re beautiful. They deserve somebody in their life that isn’t going to abuse them. When you don’t have that you find yourself hittin’ and missin’, trying to figure it out, searching for that acceptance and that love. That’s very much our shared story.” That potent back story infuses Tyree’s deeply felt interpretations of Fitzgerald standards. Tyree’s singing doesn’t really sound anything like

culture

her stage alter ego but she does capture her heart and soul. Tyree, a natural wailer, has found crooning ballad and scat-styles to conjure the spirit of Ella. Tyree makes up for no formal training and the inability to read music with perfect pitch and a highly adaptable voice. “My voice is very versatile and my range is off the charts,” Tyree says matter-of-factly. “I can sing pretty much anything you put in front of me because it’s all in my ear. I’ve been blessed because they (music directors) can play it one time and I get it.” She considers herself a singer first and an actress second, but in Ella she does both. She overcame initial doubts about the thick book she had to learn for the part. “It’s a lot of lines and a lot of acting and a lot of transitions because I’m narrating her life from 15 years-old to 50.” But after months of rehearsal Tyree’s doing what she feels anointed to do in a space where she’s most at home. “This is where I get to be lost and do what I do best, this is where I don’t miss. I think it’s because it’s coming from a sincere place. My number one goal is that everybody in the audience leaves blessed. I want to pour something out of me into them. I want ‘em to leave on a high. It’s not about me when I’m on stage. This is God-given and there’s a lot of responsibility that comes with it to deliver.” This popular performer with a deep list of musical theater credits (Ain’t Misbehavin’, Beehive) feels she’s inhabiting the role of a lifetime and one that may finally motivate her to stretch herself outside Omaha. “I’m still like blown away they asked me to come do this show. I still have goals and dreams and things I want to do. As you go through your journey in life there’s things that hinder those goals and dreams and they cause you to second guess and doubt yourself – that maybe I don’t have what it takes. I’m hoping this will instill in me the courage to just go for it and start knocking on some of those doors.” Ella continues through March 30. For times and tickets, visit www.omahacommunityplayhouse.com. Read more of Leo Adam Biga’s work at leoadambiga.wordpress.com.

| THE READER |

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overtheedge LIFESTYLE COLUMN BY TIM MCMAHAN

S X S W : BA D G E S ? YO U D O N ’ T N E E D N O S T E E N K - I N G BA D G E S

As I type this I’m already at South By Southwest (SXSW) in Austin, Texas. In fact, I’ve been here since Sunday afternoon, taking in the Interactive portion of the conference, sent to learn the latest in digital media for my day-job. The “vacation” part of the trip — the part I’m documenting for The Reader — begins Wednesday when I switch hats and cover the music portion of the conference/festival. If you’re reading this on Wednesday through Friday (or thereafter) you can check out the day-to-day coverage at thereader.com, written by myself and/or fellow music journalist Chris Aponick. Or you can just wait until the next issue hits the stands and read our capsule summaries (but you’re going to miss out on a lot of fun). I’ve been going to SXSW since aught nine. This is the first year I can remember when no “major” artist or band has been booked or rumored to play the festival — no Springsteen no Metallica no Kanye will be here to thrill the national slacker media with a rare club performance. This morning SXSW trumpeted that Lady GaGa will give a keynote address at the Austin Convention Center. Neil Young also will talk about his new hi-fidelity portable music service

Film Streams at the Ruth Sokolof Theater 14th & Mike Fahey Street (formerly Webster Street) More info & showtimes 402.933.0259 · filmstreams.org Facebook | Twitter | Instagram: @filmstreams

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MARCH13-19, 2014

called Pono. And Blondie will take a turn behind a podium. And while there’s talk that Gaga has been negotiating for weeks to do a show at outdoor venue Stubb’s, there’s nothing planned for Young or Blondie other than monotone speeches. Believe it or not, there’s an actual Music Conference going on during SXSW this week. In all my years traveling to Austin, I’ve yet to meet anyone who actually attended one of the “informational sessions,” even though attendance is free with a Music Badge. If it’s a choice between spending your afternoon listening to an eager music industry “executive” drone on and on about the value of “branding your band” or drinking watered-down mimosas at one of the many free day parties that feature the same bands who performed at “badge events” the night before, well, that choice is pretty simple. By the way, other riveting music conference topics include “Album Recording: When Do You Hire a Pro?” “Copyright Termination Rules Have to Change,” and “No Rules: Defying Genres in the Music Business.” Riveting. In no other year at SXSW has a Music Badge — which can be bought for an exorbitant amount or earned by being a member of a sponsoring media

First-Run Films Child’s Pose First-Run

Dir. Cãlin Peter Netzer. Starts Friday, March 14

“It’s an extremely strong and upsetting film, yet another example of the fascinating things going on in Romania’s new wave.” -- Sheila O’Malley, RogerEbert.com Stranger By the Lake First-Run

Dir. Alain Guiraudie. Through Thursday, March 20

Last chance!

| THE READER |

over the edge

outlet — been more unnecessary. Almost every band on my “must see” list is playing a free day party or free non-badge showcase somewhere this week. In past years, it would have been worth having a badge to get in to see exclusive performances by Jesus and Mary Chain or Springsteen or a reunion of Big Star. This year all you’re getting for your badge is Spandau Ballet, Willie Nelson or a chance to win a ticket to see Coldplay. Without those amazing exclusive performances for Music Badge holders, SXSW has a problem on its hands. Aponick, who does have a badge, told me last week he may spend his entire time in Austin at Beerland — a punk venue about the size of O’Leaver’s that will feature the hottest garage bands in the country playing every night for free. Beerland has never participated in SXSW, so a badge will get you nothing more than scorn from the greasy locals who frequent the bar when they see your laminate hanging ‘round your neck. People have been known to take off their laminates/badges when attending day parties. While the locals will recognize you as a music tourist anyway, why give up your identity as an out-of-town hick on a newspaper-sponsored boondoggle so easily? With no gee-whiz acts and most band playing “unofficial” day gigs, is the music industry’s decline beginning to eat away at SXSW’s infrastructure? In fact, this year’s SXSW features the fewest number of Nebraska bands in recent memory. Saddle Creek — Nebraska’s nationally recognized indie record label — is not hosting

a showcase in Austin this year, though one of its bands — Twinsmith — is playing an official gig. Omaha punk band Digital Leather is playing a few unofficial showcases (including one at Beerland). Omaha transplant Dan Scheuerman’s band Deleted Scenes plays a showcase, as does former Omahan Adam Hawkins’ band Eros and the Eschaton. From an indie music standpoint, that’s about it. Still, it’s SXSW. And if there wasn’t anything worth seeing, I wouldn’t be here and neither would the tens of thousands of media tourists who booked hotels a year in advance, making the trip not only for the music but to escape whatever winter hell they came from. My short list of must-see acts includes Eagulls, Kurt Vile, Future Islands, Foxygen, Urge Overkill, Speedy Ortiz, Warpaint, Gary Numan, Steve Wynn, Angel Olsen, No Joy, Gardens & Villa, Timber Timbre, Perfume Genius, Vertical Scratchers, Cate Le Bon, White Mystery, Spray Paint, and on and on. And as much as I hate to admit it, I’ll go out of my way to see those few Nebraska bands that have made the trip to this faraway land in hopes of maybe — just maybe — getting the attention of somebody from outside of Nebraska who can make a difference in their career. Because isn’t that was South By Southwest is all about? By the way, on my first day at SXSW, the temperature was warmer in Omaha than it was in Austin. There’s a message hidden in there somewhere.

OVER THE EDGE is a weekly column by Reader senior contributing writer Tim McMahan focused on culture, society, music, the media and the arts. Email Tim at tim.mcmahan@gmail.com. And be sure to check out his blog at Lazy-i.com

Coming Soon The Grand Budapest Hotel First-Run (R) Tim’s Vermeer First-Run (PG-13) Elaine Stritch: Shoot Me First-Run Finding Vivian Maier First-Run Jodorowsky’s Dune First-Run

The Met: Live in HD Massenet’s Werther

Live: Saturday, March 15, 11:55 am Encore: Wednesday, March 19, 6 pm Presented with Opera Omaha. Prelude Talk by University of NebraskaLincoln Director of Opera William Shomos before live broadcast.

The Hitchcock 9 Generously supported by Sam Walker. The Ring 1927

Thursday, March 20, 7 pm Live score by Alex McManus, Aaron Markley & Daniel Ocanto Tickets: $12 general, $10 for students, seniors, teachers and military, and $8 for Film Streams Members.

Forever Young Admission just $2.50 for kids 12 and under! Paper Moon 1973 (PG)

Dir. Peter Bogdanovich. March, 15, 16 & 20


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| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 2014

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backbeat

■ Registration for the 2014 Omaha Girls Rock

camp is now open to girls ages 8 to 18. The camp, which will take place at the Holland Performing Arts Center, 1200 Douglas St., is also offering two camp sessions. Campers can sign up for camp July 14th to 18th or July 28th to August 1st. Applications can be submitted online at omahagirlsrock.com/camper-registration. ■ Digital Leather unveiled a new song “Lately”, as well as the cover art, from their upcoming split LP with Wisconsin two-piece The Hussy. The release features artwork by Digital Leather member Todd Fink and is due out May 6th on Southpaw Records. Digital Leather will also appear as part of the unofficial Goner Records showcase in Austin, Tex. during the South By Southwest music conference Friday, March 14th. ■ Local dreamy garage-pop duo Killer Blow has both a new song online and a new video available on YouTube. The video clip is for “Doll”, while another new song “Convent Dropout” is streaming online at soundcloud.com/killerblow. ■ Omaha natives 311 will headline a new music festival, which will put the spotlight on a host of local Omaha, Lincoln and Council Bluffs bands. The Grassroots Music Festival will take place Saturday, July 12th at River’s Edge Park in Council Bluffs. The show will also commemorate the 20th anniversary of 311’s album, Grassroots. Tickets for the event go on sale March 11th and can be purchased at the Hive Rock Club, 1207 Harney St., or via Ticketmaster. ■ The Big Deep celebrated the release of their second album, Echoes on the Little Blue, at the Waiting Room Lounge, 6212 Maple St. The roots-rock/indie rock band recorded the album on a farm in Endicott, Neb. The band will be joined at the release show by Rock Paper Dynamite and Michael Wunder & the Uninspired. ■ Lincoln experimental indie act UUVVWWZ crafted a new video for “Broad Sky Blues”, off their 2013 album the trusted language. The video, directed by Harrison Martin, features Chelsea Richardson, a friend of UU singer Teal Gardner, crafting the song’s chorus into American Sign Language and then teaching the gestures to a group of people. The video can be viewed on Youtube. --Chris Aponick The Reader’s Backbeat column seeks to cover the local music scene from all corners of the sound spectrum. Whether it’s news of new bands, farewell shows, album releases or special events, The Reader’s music team wants to hear from you. Got a tip? Email to backbeat@thereader.com

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MARCH 13 - 19, 2014

livemusiccalendar

SEND CALENDAR INFORMATION — including addresses, dates, times, costs and phone numbers — to The Reader’s calendar editor. Mail to or drop off information at P.O. Box 7360 Omaha, NE 68107; email to listings@thereader.com; fax to (402) 341.6967. Deadline is 5 p.m. the Thursday prior to issue date.

THURSDAY 13

SAMANTHA FISH W/ OLD NO. 5’S, (Blues) 6 pm, 21st Saloon, Contact venue for charge. DURTY THURSDAY W/E BROWN, (DJ/Electronic) 9 pm, Bar 415, FREE. NEW MOON SONGWRITERS NIGHT, (Folk/Singer-Songwriter) 7 pm, Crescent Moon Coffee, FREE. STUDENT ENSEMBLES: SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA, 7:30 pm, Kimball Recital Hall, General Admission $5 | Students/Seniors $3. SMOOTH JAZZ THURSDAYS AT THE OZONE LOUNGE WITH IN THE GRUV, (Jazz) 6:30 pm, OzoNE Lounge at Anthony’s Steakhouse, FREE. CHIEFS, ADAM PETERSON AND KING THUMPER, 7 pm, Shamrock’s Pub & Grill, Contact venue for charge. THE POTATO PIRATES W/ DSM-5, CORDIAL SPEW & TBA, (Punk) 8 pm, The Hideout Lounge, $5 21+ / $7 18-20. ACOUSTIC NIGHT, 8 pm, The Tavern, FREE. ACOUSTIC MUSIC THURSDAYS!, 8 pm, Two Fine Irishmen, Contact venue for charge. CIRCLE OF HEAT, (Rock) 9 pm, Venue 51, $5. LESLIE AND THE LYS W/DEAN AND THE DELILAHS & BOONE COUNTY COMEDY TROUPE, 9 pm, Waiting Room, $10 ADV | $12 DOS. ACOUSTIC JAM, 1 pm, Western Historic Trails Center, FREE. DIRTY RIVER RAMBLERS, 9 pm, Zoo Bar, $5. SHITHOOK GONE COUNTRY, (Cover Band) 6 pm, Zoo Bar, $5.

SUNDAY 16

FRIDAY 14

SERGIO PALLOTTELLI - FLUTIST, (Classical) 3 pm, Augustana Lutheran Church, FREE. MOLLY GENE ONE WHOAMAN BAND, (Folk/Singer-Songwriter) 9 pm, Bourbon Theater, Contact venue for charge. ADAM MARSLAND W/FLOATING OPERA AND WELDON KEYS, (Rock) 7 pm, Duffy’s Tavern, $5. SALSA SUNDAY W/ LATIN MADNESS, 7 pm, House Of Loom, $5. STUDENT ENSEMBLES: CHORAL CONCERT, 3 pm, Kimball Recital Hall, General Admission $5 | Students/Seniors $3. OPEN MIC NIGHT W/FEAT. ARTIST SOUTHPAW BLUEGRASS BAND, 9 pm, O’Leaver’s Pub, FREE. O’LEAVER’S OPEN MIC NIGHT, 9 pm, O’Leaver’s Pub, FREE. SOARING WINGS VINEYARD SUNDAY MUSIC W/TIM KOEHN, 2 pm, Soaring Wings Vineyard, FREE. J. LONGORIA W/KARTERBOY, (Pop) 8 pm, The Hideout Lounge, Contact venue for charge. OPEN MIC NIGHT W/HECTOR ANCHANDO, 7 pm, Tracks Lounge, Contact venue for charge. ANDY D, (Rock) 9 pm, Waiting Room, $8. ACADEMY OF ROCK, (Rock) 6 pm, Zoo Bar, Contact venue for charge.

SATURDAY 15

OPEN MIC NIGHT, 6 pm, 402 Arts Collective/ Aromas Coffeehouse, FREE. ST. PATRICK’S DAY - KRONEN, 9 pm, Bar 415, Contact venue for charge. OPEN MIC & SONGWRITER SHOWCASE, (Folk/Singer-Songwriter) 9 pm, Barley Street Tavern, FREE. DICEY RILEY, (Rock) 2 pm, Dubliner Pub, $5. ST. PATRICK’S DAY W/ BOLZEN BEER BAND, 9 pm, Duffy’s Tavern, $5. FIRST CUT INDUSTRY NIGHT W/ DJ DRDRIGGS, (DJ/Electronic) 9 pm, House Of Loom, FREE. ST. PATRICK’S DAY W/HI-FI HANGOVER, (Rock) 9 pm, Loose Moose, FREE. GOOCH & HIS LASVEGAS BIG BAND, 8 pm, OzoNE Lounge at Anthony’s Steakhouse, FREE.

3D IN YOUR FACE, (Rock) 9 pm, 21st Saloon, $5. ESPIRALE & TALIBANG, 9 pm, Bar 415, $5. DICEY RILEY, (Folk/Singer-Songwriter) 9 pm, Dubliner Pub, $3. KARAOKE THEATRE, 9 pm, House Of Loom, Free. A LIVE PERFORMANCE W/LIVIN EASY, (Jazz) 6 pm, Jazz, A Louisiana Kitchen, Contact venue for charge. TIER 2, NORTHWEST PASSAGE AND RED CITIES, 9 pm, Knickerbockers, Contact venue for charge. NOAH’S ARK WAS A SPACESHIP W/POST VERSE, 9:30 pm, O’Leaver’s Pub, $5. CRIME SENA, (Cover Band) 7 pm, Parliament Pub Downtown, Contact venue for charge. HOMEMADE CRAZY, CAPITOL AVE, & FISH HOUSE PUNCH, 7 pm, Shamrock’s Pub & Grill, Contact venue for charge. DAMON DOTSON, 8 pm, Slowdown, $5. FACCS: JOHNNY REEF & THE SHIPWRECKS, (Blues) 5 pm, Venue 51, FREE. SHAMROCKFEST W/LAST WORD CLIQUE, PROJEKT LUNA, SEBASTIAN GHOSTBACHZ, BIG BURN, & COLTARO THE PHARAOH, 8 pm, Waiting Room, $8. TIJUANA GIGOLOS, (Rock) 5 pm, Zoo Bar, $5. MEZCAL BROS., 9 pm, Zoo Bar, Contact venue for charge. ROUGH CUT, (Rock) 8:30 pm, Ameristar Casino, FREE. R STYLE, (Hip-Hop/Rap) 9 pm, Arena Bar & Grill, FREE. AARON LEE & WOODY MCBRIDE, (DJ/Electronic) 9 pm, Bar 415, $5. DICEY RILEY, (Rock) 12 pm, Dubliner Pub, $3. KARAOKE, 8 pm, Firewater Grille, Contact venue for charge. CHRISTOPHER O’RILEY, 8 pm, Holland Performing Arts Center, Tickets start at $30. 25TH ANNIVERSARY CELEBRATION OF DE LA SOUL’S 3 FEET HIGH AND RISING, (DJ/Electronic/Hip-Hop/Rap) 10 pm, House Of Loom, FREE. AN EVENING W/THE HIGHTOPS, (Jazz) 6 pm, Jazz, A Louisiana Kitchen, Contact venue for charge.

| THE READER |

THE KILLIGANS AND MEZCAL BROTHERS, 9 pm, Knickerbockers, Contact venue for charge. SECRET WEAPON, (COVER BAND) 9:30 pm, Loose Moose, FREE. LET ALONE WITH A SUMMER BETTER THAN YOURS AND THE CRASH BANDITS, (Rock) 9:30 pm, O’Leaver’s Pub, $5. JOSH HOYER & THE SHADOWBOXERS, (Rock) 7 pm, Parliament Pub Downtown, Contact venue for charge. ADAM MARSLAND, (Rock) 8 pm, Pizza Shoppe Collective, $5. HECTOR ANCHONDO BAND, (Blues) 9 pm, Rusty Nail Pub, Contact venue for charge. JOSH WATSON, PARADIGM SHIFT, RYAN LIEB, FALLIBLE, JOHN FINO, CONNOR SWANSON AND MORSE CODE, 8 pm, Shamrock’s Pub & Grill, Contact venue for charge. 10 YEARS UNPLUGGED W/HELLBOUND GLORY, 8 pm, Slowdown, ADV $20 | DOS $25. THE BISHOPS, (Reggae/Island) 9:30 pm, T Henery’s, $2. CORPSE, (Metal) 7 pm, The Hideout Lounge, Contact venue for charge. SOUL NIGHT, 8 pm, The Sydney, Contact venue for charge. THE LAST DRAFT, TWO SHAKES & LOW LONG SIGNAL, (Rock) 9 pm, Venue 51, $5. KRIS LAGER BAND W/THE DECATURES, 9 pm, Waiting Room, $8. VALERIE JUNE W/ A FEROCIOUS JUNGLE CAT, 9 pm, Zoo Bar, ADV $12 | DOS $15.

music listings

MONDAY 17

ST. PATRICK’S DAY W/RHETORIC, A WASTED EFFORT AND ALEX & MATT DIBAISE, 7 pm, Shamrock’s Pub & Grill, Contact venue for charge. SMOOTH JAZZ W/ED ARCHIBALD, (Jazz) 7 pm, Tracks Lounge, Contact venue for charge. WAITING ROOM MUSIC QUIZ, 8 pm, Waiting Room, FREE. PADDYWHACK, 6 pm, Zoo Bar, $5. PIANO HOUR W/ EMILY BASS, 5 pm, Zoo Bar, Contact venue for charge.

TUESDAY 18

VIC NASTY, 8 pm, Bar 415, Contact venue for charge. OPEN MIC NIGHT, 9:30 pm, Dubliner Pub, FREE. UNL FACULTY JAZZ GROUP, (Jazz) 7:30 pm, Kimball Recital Hall, General Admission $5 | Students $3. LION IN THE MANE, 9 pm, Knickerbockers, Contact venue for charge. OPEN MIC HOSTED BY DAVE YOBLE, 8 pm, Venue 51, FREE. MARIJUANA DEATHSQUADS AND LIZZO, 9 pm, Waiting Room, $10. JAZZOCRACY, (Jazz) 6 pm, Zoo Bar, FREE. DJ RELIC SOUL PARTY, 8 pm, Zoo Bar, FREE.

WEDNESDAY 19

CORNHUSTLE 008 FEAT. THE REBUILDER, TYEDUP, JUST JACE AND TRAX MATTHEWS, (DJ/Electronic) 9 pm, Bar 415, FREE. DICEY RILEYS, 7 pm, Brazen Head Irish Pub, FREE. THE MORAN WOODWIND QUINTET, (Classical) 7:30 pm, Kimball Recital Hall, General Admission $5 | Students/Seniors $3. GHOSTS OF GUYANA, 9 pm, Knickerbockers, Contact venue for charge. THE ENTRANCE BAND W/LA LUZ AND MILLIONS OF BOYS, 8 pm, Slowdown, $10. WHIPKEY WEDNESDAYS W/MATT WHIPKEY, (Folk/SingerSongwriter) 8 pm, Tracks Lounge, Contact venue for charge. THAT 1 GUY, 9 pm, Waiting Room, $13. DAVINA AND THE VAGABONDS, (Blues) 6 pm, Zoo Bar, $10. ANDY D W/ POWERFUL SCIENCE AND LIFE IN PRISM, (Rock) 9 pm, Zoo Bar, $5.


BY B.J. HUCHTEMANN

Samantha, Valerie & Davina

T

he extremely talented guitarist-vocalist Samantha Fish plays The 21st Saloon Thursday, March 13. Kansas City-based Fish is touring behind her fall 2013 disc, Black Wind Howlin’ (Ruf Records), her latest collaboration with Mike Zito as producer. The CD is getting plenty of national attention, as Fish’s star continues to rise. Fish took the 2012 Blues Music Award for Best New Artist Debut for Runaway, her first collaboration with Zito and her first international Ruf release. Valerie June Shines Valerie June joins the great Sharon Jones in Denver as her opening act March 17. June is at Lincoln’s Zoo Bar Saturday, March 15, 9 p.m. The show is part of the Zoo’s “Dancehall Series,” with tables and chairs picked up to expand the dance floor. A Ferocious Jungle Cat opens. NPR says of June, “She grew up in Tennessee and her music feels like it rides the spectrum of the signature sounds of her home state, from the rural roots of hill country to Nashville’s country twang to foot-stomping Memphis blues…[a] special blend of blues, folk, country and gospel.” See valeriejune.com. Davina Soars The dynamic and joyful Davina & the Vagabonds bring their swing, R&B and New Orleans-influenced

hoodoo

music to Lincoln’s Zoo Bar Wednesday, March 19, 6-9 p.m. Minneapolis-based Davina’s bright, infectiously danceable sound is powered by a hot band featuring horns backing up her magnificent vocal range and marvelous keyboard power. Expect pure musicianship mixed with full-on fun. In the past year the band has toured Europe several times and was a hit at the prestigious Monterey Jazz Festival. Her photo made the front page of the Monterey Community Herald with the rave, “The singer/pianist and her band were easily among the breakout stars at this year’s festival.” See davinaandthevagabonds.com. Hot Notes Smokin’ Joe Kubek & Bnois King hit The 21st Saloon next Thursday, March 20, 6-9 p.m. Trampled Under Foot plays the Zoo Bar March 20, 6-9 p.m. Great shows in the next few weeks include two powerhouse favorites. Carolyn Wonderland has one Nebraska stop, she hits the Zoo Bar Tuesday, March 25, 6-9 p.m. Hadden Sayers has a show at Lincoln’s Zoo Bar Wednesday, March 26, and at The 21st Saloon Thursday, March 27. Both shows 6-9 p.m. Local shows of note include Tijuana Gigolos 5-7 p.m. Friday, March 14, at the Zoo with Mezcal Brothers 9:30 p.m. Kris Lager Band gigs at The Waiting Room Saturday, March 15, 9 p.m. and Josh Hoyer & The Shadowboxers are at Parliament Pub Saturday, March 15, 9 p.m.

108052 – Omaha Reader – TBD

HOODOO is a weekly column focusing on blues, roots, Americana and occasional other music styles with an emphasis on live music performances. Hoodoo columnist B.J. Huchtemann is a Reader senior contributing writer and veteran music journalist who has covered the local music scene for nearly 20 years. Follow her blog at hoodoorootsblues.blogspot.com.

GREAT WHITE AND SLAUGHTER MARCH 28 Tickets available at whiskeyroadhouse.com, Ticketmaster.com or by phone at 1-800-745-300

62nd & Maple jakescigars.com

I-29 South, Exit 1B | horseshoe.com Must be 21 years or older to attend shows or to gamble. Know When To Stop Before You Start.® Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-BETS-OFF (Iowa) or 1-800-522-4700 (National). ©2014, Caesars License Company, LLC.

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| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 20143/5/14

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9:46 AM


newsoftheweird

T H E WO R L D G O N E F R E A K Y B Y C H U C K S H E P H E R D W I T H I L LU S T R AT I O N S B Y T O M B R I S C O E

Teach a Man to Fish

T

he Drug Users Resource Center in Vancouver, British Columbia (heralded previously in News of the Weird for a vending machine dispensing 25-cent crack-cocaine pipes to discourage addicts from committing crimes to fund their habit), launched a program in August to supply alcoholics with beer-brewing and wine-making ingredients to discourage them from drinking rubbing alcohol, hand-sanitizer and mouthwash. The DURC “co-op” sells, for $10 monthly, brewing mix in a pre-hopped beer kit, but eventually, an official said, co-op members will brew from scratch, including boiling, mashing and milling. A civic leader told Canada’s National Post that the program has already begun to reduce crime in areas frequented by alcoholics.

Government in Action -- Rape-prevention activists estimate that local governments have backlogs of untested evidentiary “rape kits” that total up to 400,000 nationally -- signifying free crimes for rapists, lost justice for victims, and ruined reputations for men wrongly arrested. (As TV police dramas emphasize, many rape victims are reluctant to submit to the indignity of swabbing and photographing so soon after being violated and comply only because detectives assure them of the rape kit’s importance.) Memphis, Tenn., has an inventory of 12,000, and the state of Texas at least 16,000 -- dating back to the 1980s. However, the cost of testing (about $500 each) is daunting for many city budgets, according to a February report by the Rape Kit Action Project in New York. -- More Texas Justice: After 37 years in prison, Jerry Hartfield goes to court in April for a retrial of his 1977 conviction (and death sentence) for murder in Bay City, Texas. Actually, the 1977 conviction was overturned, but before Hartfield could demand his release (he is described in court documents as illiterate with an IQ of 51), the then-governor commuted the sentence to life in prison in 1983. It was only in 2006 that a fellow inmate persuaded Hartfield that the commutation was illusory -- since there was, at that point, no “sentence” to commute. Hartfield’s lawyers call Texas’ treatment a blatant violation of his

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MARCH 13-19, 2014

| THE READER |

weird news

constitutional right to a “speedy” trial, but prosecutors suggest that it is Hartfield’s own fault that he has remained in prison the last 30 years. -- Congressional wisdom has prevented the federal government’s Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) from using competitive bids to decide how much to pay for medical devices -- and among the most steeply overpriced products are “vacuum erection systems” (“penis pumps”) that invigorate seniors’ lives. CMS pays an average of $360, while the Department of Veterans Affairs, which also buys the pumps but by competitive bid, pays about $185. In a January report, the Health and Human Services inspector general estimated the government could save $18 million a year (and beneficiaries another $4.5 million) if CMS could use competitive bidding.

Great Art! -- Frances Wadsworth-Jones’ jewelry design show (“Heaven Sent”) at the Museum of London runs until April, with centerpiece brooches that resemble bird droppings. Why, she was asked, would a woman want to wear jewelry suggesting that a pigeon soiled her lapel? “The stain is very intimate,” said the artist. It’s “something that you wouldn’t want, and you’re turning it into something beautiful.” WadsworthJones’ pieces have sold for as much as the equivalent of $4,000. -- In December, the New York City parks department, responding to alarmed visitors at Socrates Sculpture Park in Queens, built a wooden fence to shield the sculpture “Bear Eats Man” so that parents might examine the structure before children start asking them awkward questions. The sculpture by Ms. Thordis Adalsteinsdottir is of a bear clutching, and about to bite, a man -- who appears in shock and sports an erection that art aficionados have justified as possibly representing the man’s involuntary reflexive shock, according to a New York Times report.

Police Report -- Inexplicable: (1) Three suspects fled with about 30 pieces of jewelry from a burglary at Timothy’s Fine Jewelry in Broomfield, Colo., in January, but not


COPYRIGHT 2014 CHUCK SHEPHERD. Visit Chuck Shepherd daily at NewsoftheWeird. blogspot.com or NewsoftheWeird.com. Send Weird News to WeirdNewsTips@yahoo.com or P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, FL 33679. Illustrations by Tom Briscoe (smallworldcomics.com).

before creating a puzzling scene on the surveillance video. Crushing the glass cases with sledgehammers, they moved quickly around the store, all the while constantly telling each other, “I love you, brother.” (2) Glenn Rundles, 32, was captured only days after robbing two women at knifepoint in East Post Oak, Texas, in January -- despite a wanted poster called by some the “worst police sketch ever,” a “cartoon” of a comically round-faced man (displayed at http://huff. to/1cXWT3p). -- Suspicion Confirmed: After Florida Highway Patrol Trooper Donna Jane Watts ticketed Miami Police Department officer Fausto Lopez in 2011 for speeding to an off-duty job at 120 mph, naturally some in law enforcement began harassing her as a “rat,” according to a February Associated Press report. One provocation stood out -- other officers’ accessing Watts’ driver record by claiming to be on official business. Watts identified those officers’ employers and recently filed a lawsuit under the federal Driver Privacy Protection Act, which provides penalties of up to $2,500 for each of the more than 200 unauthorized searches by 88 officers from 25 police agencies.

Democracy in Action Christopher Schaeffer likely became the first public officeholder in the U.S. sworn in as an openly declared “Pastafarian” -- an adherent of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster -- when he took his seat on the Town Council of Pomfret, N.Y., in January. Schaeffer was wearing the traditional Pastafarian religious head covering (a colander). The Aristocrats! (1) Timothy Margis, 38, had risen professionally to become the director of Public Safety of Concordia University in River Forest, Ill. He is also the man who was fired in February after admitting that he had committed a “lewd act” in a colleague’s office (which police later explained involved masturbating into a woman’s shoe). (2) Catherine Dajnowski, 40, was arrested in February in Boca Raton, Fla., after she had climbed into a shopping cart in the parking lot of a Publix supermarket and would not allow a Publix employee to return it to the store. Dajnowski called 911 three times from

the cart, demanding that police come make the employee leave her alone -- the third time during which a sheriff ’s deputy was standing right beside the cart.

The Place To Be On Fry Day!

Creme de la Weird DIY Pervert: Andrew Stoodley pleaded guilty in February in England’s Stroud Magistrates Court for invading the privacy of a neighbor woman whom he had admitted photographing surreptitiously about 100 times. (“She is a very beautiful woman,” he said, “and I enjoy looking at her.”) The worst episode, committed in July 2013, involved Stoodley dangling first a mirror, using a stick and string, outside her curtainless bedroom window at night and later, said the prosecutor, a cellphone camera “up and down (outside the window) like a yo-yo for 20 minutes.”

come in for a fishbowl before or after your fish fry. drink specials all lenten season long.

Least Competent Criminals Clumsy: (1) The surveillance video of The Shambles bar in Chicago showed that an attempted break-in one night in January went awry when the unidentified perp removed the front entrance lock but gave up and fled seconds later when he couldn’t open the door -- which he was shown furiously pulling on, oblivious that it was a “push” door. (2) Robert Williams, 42, was charged with robbing a PNC Bank in Laurel, Md., in February after starring in the surveillance video by twice spilling his entire loot ($20,650) on the bank’s floor. After he finally gathered the bills and fled in a pickup truck, police punctured the tires, and when Williams tried to run, he slipped on the ice, slashing his head open.

It’s Your Neighborhood Bar. 4721 NW Radial Hwy Omaha • (402) 933-9300

Undignified Deaths In December, a 38-year-old man, apparently fed up with his girlfriend’s demands that he continue accompanying her at a shopping mall in Xuzhou, China, threw himself off a seventh-floor balcony, to his death. A witness reported the man yelling that the girlfriend already had “more shoes than she could wear in a lifetime, and it was pointless buying any more.” Following increasingly heated exchanges, the man dropped her shopping bags and leaped over the railing. COPYRIGHT 2014 CHUCK SHEPHERD

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| THE READER |

MARCH 13-19, 2014

21


Cutting Room provides breaking local and national movie news … complete with added sarcasm. Send any relevant information to film@thereader.com. Check out Ryan on Movieha!, a weekly half-hour movie podcast (movieha.libsyn.com/rss), catch him on radio on CD 105.9 (cd1059.com) on Fridays around 7:30 a.m. and on KVNO 90.7 (kvno.org) at 8:30 a.m. on Fridays and follow him on Twitter (twitter.com/thereaderfilm).

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MARCH 13 - 19, 2014

Xerox Xerxes

300: Rise of an Empire is a fun copy

by Ryan Syrek

W

hen director Zack Snyder’s opus of underwear modeling amidst geysers of animated blood, 300, first arrived eight years ago, no one expected a sequel. And not just because 299 of the 300 Spartans were way too dead to return. Technically, 300: Rise of an Empire isn’t a sequel: It’s a prequel…and a side-quel…and a sequel… Look, to fans of the first film, all that really matters is swordfight, naval battle, crazy sex scene, severed head toss and hunchbacks throwing fireballs. Any questions? The non-sequel sequel opens with the widowed Queen Gorgo (Lena Headey) readying Spartan warriors for battle. Rightfully super pissed about her husband’s decapitation, Gorgo tells the troops about what started the conflict between the Persian Empire and the Greek city states. Using language lifted from Dick Cheney’s Mad Libs, Gorgo explains that the Persians “hated the Greeks’ freedom.” Flashing back to years before the original 300, we see a chubby Persian king try to show Greeks democracy is dumb by killing them. Only, Themistokles (Sullivan Stapleton) kills him in front of his son, Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro). That’s old school diplomacy. From the past, the new film catches up and spends a long time occurring simultaneously as the original; Themistokles and the outnumbered Greeks are holding off a Persian naval invasion while Leonidas and the 300 are dying elsewhere.

| THE READER |

film

Sadly, the crappy Greek ships seem to be made of balsa wood and bubble gum, and the bad guys have an awesome naval commander, Artemisia (Eva Green). Dressed like a Goth dude’s dream girl, Artemisia was born in Greece but was sex trafficked into Persia by fellow Greeks. Now she wants to kill them all. The only hope of defeating the superior force is if the Spartans join the Greek army to avenge the 300 warriors who are dead by the third act of this film. It’s far less complicated than it sounds. In fact, it feels like there almost is no real plot, as if it is nothing but face stabbing and a truly unique sex scene between Artemisia and Themistokles. In the middle of an epic battle, the two leaders hatefully consummate their feud atop a strategy map. It’s one of those “thin line between love and hate” moments, where the only thing that prevents it from being an extension of pa-

REPORTCARD

Despite having carved the letter “Z” into people’s buttocks using a sword once described as a “gay blade,” Zorro is getting a grim n’ gritty reboot. Playwright and screenwriter Chris Boal has been brought on to deliver a darker take on the famous character that is in line with Batman. Because who didn’t see Zorro and think “I bet he cries when he’s alone. Leonardo DiCaprio must have liked what he saw of Jonah Hill in The Wolf of Wall Street. No, I didn’t mean that scene, I meant in general. Because the saddest man at the Oscar party is reteaming with Hill for The Ballad of Richard Jewell, which tells the story of the 1996 Atlanta Olympics bombing. A writer has now been assigned: Billy Ray, fresh off an Oscar nod for Captain Phillips. I feel confident in DiCaprio’s chances to be simultaneously honored and humiliated by an Oscar nomination and loss for this next film. Not really movie news, but seeing as how many people shared the video, I feel a need to tell you they haven’t invented a hoverboard. Funny or Die, the comedy web site, used some famous people and special effects to make it look like science finally did us a solid by turning the fictional hovering skateboard from Back to the Future into reality. But it was a joke. A joke that made lots of people sad and angry upon inspection. So, it’s kind of like anything Daniel Tosh says. Steven Spielberg is reportedly thinking about remaking West Side Story. I’m no fan of movie musicals, so I don’t really have a dog in this race, but we only have so many years left with one of the greatest directors of all time, so I’d prefer he do something that hasn’t been done. Yes, this is my plea for him to finally read my spec script Robots and Aliens and Stuff. —Ryan Syrek

triarchal rape culture is the fact that Artemisia initiates, dominates and terminates said weird intercourse. New director Noam Murro is clearly ghostdirected here by Snyder, imitating every stylistic choice from the first film. This isn’t bad, but also isn’t surprising or original, thanks to the scores of imitators who copycatted the original film. It should be noted that part of the “fun” with this graphic violence is the unreality. As plumes of human juice spurt in impossible shapes and quantities, the movie becomes less and less real and more and more cartoony/comic booky (and more and more enjoyable). Elevated only by Green’s gleefully demented performance, 300: Rise of an Empire, to its credit and its detriment, plays like a fun but needless extension of its predecessor. GRADE = B-

READER RECOMMENDS

12 Years a Slave = A+Brutal, horrifying and difficult to watch. As it should be.

3 Days to Kill = F A CIA agent with brain cancer must...look, just don’t see it, okay.

American Hustle = B Solid, slightly odd, con film with great female performances.

ON DVD

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire = A The best sci-fi sequel since Empire Strikes Back. The Lego Movie = B+Turns out you can make an awesome movie about inanimate plastic blocks. Robocop = CIt almost isn’t horrible! The Wolf of Wall Street = BDiCaprio crackles but the movie fizzles without taking a clear stance on Wall Street excess.


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MAR. 13 - 19, 2014

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