The Signal: Spring ‘17 No. 9

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Eickhoff sails from Sylva to maximum security cell By Davey Bones Deep Sea Slut

The infamous ghost captain, who terrorized late-night hikers near Lake Sylva aboard his ghoulish 18th century frigate, has finally been unmasked thanks to some plucky teens and their animal sidekick with a speech impediment. Harold Eickhoff was taken into police custody on Saturday, March 25, after a group of resourceful Brewster Hall residents joined forces with Roscoe the Lion to subdue the former College president in a daring sting operation. The group, led by freshman criminal justice major Phred Jones, revealed Eickhoff’s true identity and turned him over to police at 3:15 a.m. that morning. Since late last January, Eickhoff had been playing the role of Captain Sylva, a ghostly marauder that patrols the coast of the nearby lake of the same name. The lakeside phantom would fire canister shots at passersby in the early hours of the morning, as he shouted cryptic warnings like “Get away from my new sports fields” and “Fuck Phi AD.” “I thought the cannon fire was just construction the entire

Photo courtesy of Sue Dubai Warner

Eickhoff denounces ASS wholly.

first month,” said Neil “Baggy” Thrasher, a freshman psychology major. “I wasn’t too familiar with the firing sound of 18th century ballistics, but after hearing dozens of similar accounts of the ghost from floormates, I began to think something was up.” After a month of daily incident reports, Campus Police sent out an email telling students not to let any suspicious 18th century deep-sea

vessels “tailgate” them into buildings, and late-night pot smokers were told to proceed near Lake Sylva with caution. “After we saw the email, myself and a few of my floormates decided it was time to take matters into our own hands,” Jones told The Singal. From the safety of the Allen Lounge, Roscoe, Hoff and Thrasher joined freshman chemistry major

Daphne Fake and freshman criminal justice major Velveeta Slicely to form the Anti-Spectre Squad, an organization dedicated to solving the mystery of Captain Sylva. “We spent a while gathering all the clues together,” Fake told The Singal. “ASS’s first real breakthrough came when I was patrolling the south side of the lake with my friend, Jesse Fratapolous, who’s a member of Phi AD.”

When the spirit caught sight of Fratapolous letters, it immediately unleashed a furious screech and began to bombard the students with an intense barrage of cannon fire for far longer than usual, according to Day. The team used this information to its advantage the following night by dressing Roscoe and Thrasher in Phi AD letters to capture the ghost’s attention. The rest of the gang snuck on board in canoes and cornered the infamous pirate, unmasking Eickhoff and bringing him to justice. “And to think, I cleared out that damn island just to get caught by some meddling kids,” Eickhoff said. Lake Sylva has returned to its placid state, but the College has not undone its emergency security measure of limiting residents to swipe access for a random building each day during a fourminute window from 5:01 a.m. to 5:05 a.m. Police were happy to finally get this months-long mystery solved. “First the intruder, and now this! Those kids should go fulltime with this mystery-solving thing,” Chief of Police Peter Fitzinwell said.

Loser Hall renamed Zander zings in CUB Comedy Show By Paula Winner Mediocre Sentence Former

Paul Loser Hall will be renamed Loser Hall — pronounced how it is spelled — in an effort to better represent the College to prospective students. “We need to show everyone what we’re truly made of, so let’s make their experience at the College as awkward as possible,” College President R. Barbie said. Controversy over the name began when students discovered the questionable past of the building’s namesake, Paul Loser. Petitions suggesting names such as Harambe Hall and John Cena Hall were circulated. President Barbie has agreed to compromise with fans of “John Cena Hall,” saying “you can cash me outside changing the sign on Forcina Hall to ForJohnCena Hall, how ‘bout dat?” Marketing strategies for future tours will include Roscoe the Lion dancing outside of Loser Hall to a continuous loop of the cast of Glee’s rendition of the song “Loser.” Current students are happy to no longer have to put in the extra effort to insist to their friends and family that “it’s actually pronounced ‘low-zure.’” “I just want to say the word ‘loser’ if I’m reading the word ‘loser,’” said Rocky Stone, a sophomore geology major. However, some students are not as excited to see Loser Hall’s name change. “I’m a little upset about the change. I thought Paul was a decent fellow,” said Jim Crow, a senior education major. Debate on the spelling of Loser Hall was literally squashed when a prototype of a “LOOZUR HOLL” sign was destroyed by a bulldozer during campus construction. Remnants of the sign were thrown over the bridge into Lake Sylva while Sarah McLachlan’s “Angel” played in the background.

By Lou Sirr Critic

Earlier this month, the president of Save us From Bankruptcy and accounting major, Penny Saralwegot, announced that there’s little money left to spend on activities for students. During a formal meeting on March 1, Saralwegot realized that even after dipping into reserve funds, there wasn’t enough money to hire a comedian for Cruelly Uninspired Bookings’s Spring Comedy Show. “We were literally fucked,” Saralwegot told The Singal. “We are so broke, man.” Following the announcement, it seemed as though the show would not go on. With no money to pay an acclaimed comedian for the annual show, CUB was left to beg junior journalism and communication double major Benjamin Zander to perform. Mike Pence, vice president of CUB and a senior women’s, gender and sexuality studies major, proposed the idea of having a student performer. “Almost immediately, I thought, ‘Zander’” he said. “He is perfect!” Luckily, Zander came to the rescue. “We are pumped that Ben agreed to do the show,” Saralwegot said. “After, we bought him and his friends an extra large pizza and did his laundry for a week, we totally convinced him.”

Zander’s comedy sizzles, stings and bedazzles.

While initially students were annoyed with SFB’s lack of funds, Zander’s performance, which took place on Thursday, March 23, in Kendall Hall, proved detractors wrong. “At first, I was super pissed at SFB, but I think they really killed it with the idea to get Ben on board,” said Ayma Morón, a sophomore humor studies major. Freshman business major Phoebe Minded agreed. “Ben slayed,” she said. “It sucks that SFB ran out of money, but at least they came up with a solid backup option.” As Zander walked onto the stage wearing a helicopter hat and a red, leather jacket, students were blown away by his signature blend of word play, slam poetry

Len Stabler / Staph infection

and Jewish charm. Zander kicked off his performance with a comedic poem about his trip to Israel, followed by a joke about SFB’s lack of funds. “SFB ran out of money, but I say, who cares?” Zander told the crowd as they began to chant his name. “I am doing this show for free because I love you guys,” Zander, a member of Lions Teletubbies, also unveiled a never-before-heard joke that had his LTV colleagues in stitches. “As you may know, I’m very involved in LTV,” he said. “My only issue is that we never seem to cater to our Spanish-speaking audience. Imagine if we had a translated simulcast. We could call it ‘El TV!’” see SOMEONE about that ACNE

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Commencement College secures sought-after speaker

Trump builds Brickwall bar No Mexicans, no Muslims, no fruity drinks in Campus Town

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Fartures

Geese rustle feathers with monologues

Feather protests against unfair treatment. By Colin Fowl Bird Feeder

The rhythmic and sometimes jarring honking that can be heard near the College’s lakes increased in intensity on the night of March 27. The aggressive nature of the incessant squawking coming from the campus’s plethora of loud and rather opinionated geese was different in tone from their usual lakeside cries. The College’s local branch of the Geese Association for Civil Rights held its first annual Geese Monologues on the lawn in front of Lake Sylva. Known for being the most vocal minority group on campus, GACR members are intent on becoming a

Photo Courtesy of Arnold. G Feather

more recognized and respected community in the eyes of students and faculty. The objective of the monologues was to spread more awareness of the current lack of rights granted to the thin-necked fowl. They held this meeting with the goal of pushing for added liberties at the College. “We discussed in great detail the drafting of our list of grievances, which we hope will be addressed by President Gitenstein, and, ultimately, adopted into the TCNJ Policy Manual,” said Arnold G. Feather, GACR’s leader who spoke at the event. During his monologue, Feather grew passionate as he spoke of the College’s blatant prejudice against geese. His webbed feet slammed emphatically on the

grass as he paced back and forth during his speech. “Though we are not mammals, we birds still stand at an equal level of functioning and have the potential to contribute to this campus society both culturally and intellectually,” Feather said, before briefly pausing to peck at a piece of grass-poop with his beak. “We have a right to hold these monologues and discuss what upsets us,” he said, insisting that, like many other clubs on campus, GACR is entitled to its monologues. Feather expressed his anger about the College’s recent decision to hire Geese Chasers™ to employ dogs to chase the birds away from the school’s grounds. “There is no reason why I should have to scream, terrified for my life, when those dim-witted, ear-flapping hounds come chasing after us, barking at the top of their lungs!” he said. This new development was met with great opposition by GACR and was the catalyst for the group’s grievance list and appeal to campus authority. Another speaker at the event, Gabriel Down II, recalled with bruised pride how last year, they were shooed away from the Norsworthy courtyard by Campus Police, who were responding to student complaints about loud honking late at night. He curled his wing in an feathery fist of rage as he addressed a rapt audience. “They violated our right,” he said. “Under the First Amendment, we are allowed to gather and protest! We will not stand for this type of species discrimination!” The geese honked and hooted in agreement of Down’s claims, causing an angry student from inside Centennial Hall to lift open his dorm room window and yell various expletives in their direction. “It’s midnight you little fuckers, get the

hell out of here,” yelled the student, who was later identified as freshman public health major Cox Ucker. Some other students who happened to be present at the monologues expressed a more open-minded perspective regarding the event. Freshman chemistry major David Potter and sophomore philosophy major Andrew Grasshead were making their routine hike into the woods near Lake Sylva when they were drawn to the sounds of indignant honking. “We were just about to go on our walk here together in the woods,” said Potter, clutching a suspicious plastic bag. “You know, to get our daily exercise.” Grasshead nodded in agreement. “But we, like, heard these guys complaining about stuff, and we decided to come over and see what was going on,” Grasshead said. The two students began to sympathize with GACR and its cause. They developed a newfound respect for the geese’s courage to fight for what they believed in. “That’s some deep shit right there,” Grasshead acknowledged. “Kinda makes sense to me, though. I mean geese are people, too, right?” Potter echoed this sentiment. “Gotta have some respect for fellow mankind and all,” he said. When asked of any potential plans to honor GACR’s complaints, College Spokesperson Dave Muha said while the College does not have any immediate plans to fire Geese Chasers™, it will seek to honor other requests from the grievance list, such as implementing traffic signals in the College’s lakes and offering a partnership with the College’s MUSE program to further research bird evolution with the biology department.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh not the ‘Bee Movie’

By Sting Crud Picker

Four people in the Library Auditorium were abuzz with hysterical cheering in anticipation of hearing Barry B. Benson, esteemed star of the “Bee Movie,” answer the questions fans have been dying to know about the film for more than 10 years. After a viewing of the critically acclaimed movie, Benson shared his take on the film and participated in a Q&A. In celebration of the movie’s 10th anniversary, Benson has been touring colleges, beehives and the rooms of teenage boys who spend their free time on Reddit in search of so-called “dank memes” to remind everyone how important the bees are to humans. “You assholes are killing bees! We fly over to you because we want to chat, and you run, scream and flail your arms like morons,” Benson said. “We make honey, damn it! “Remember when the bees went on vacation?” Benson added. “It would be a shame for that to happen again.” Benson’s threat did not go unnoticed, as it was clear to the

crowd that Benson has grown bitter over the years, and, as a result, it felt like more of a lecture than a Q&A with the star of the beloved classic. Benson told the crowd that comedian Jerry Seinfeld, one of the film’s writers, was supposed to be touring, but “he won’t perform at colleges anymore because he thinks college kids are lame.” Benson was eager to take Seinfeld’s place, as Benson said he has a soft spot for humans. “After all, I’m married to a human,” Benson said. He then proceeded to show a slideshow of his half-bee, half-human children with his wife, Vanessa, which elicited several horrified reactions from the audience. “I never quite understood their relationship. I mean, I always thought, ‘Were they really in love? Did she have mutual feelings? How does… that… work?’” said Buzz Aldrin, a senior beekeeping major. “Now it’s been confirmed. Those psychopaths at DreamWorks — that’s why I only watch Pixar.” Benson pulled an audience member — actor Nicolas Cage, to everyone’s surprise — onto

the stage to prove that the love is mutual between humans and bees. He then put a wicker mask over Cage’s entire head and began funneling bees into it. It was clear this was against his will. “Not the bees. Ah, not the bees!” Cage yelled in protest. “Not my eyes, ah! My eyes!” TCNJ EMS rushed into the room and swatted Benson away. They took Cage out on a stretcher. “Not again,” Cage could be heard screaming, with his face

swelling by the second. TCNJ EMS told The Singal that Cage is in in critical condition, but alive. EMS said he would need to undergo intense psychiatric care as he was experiencing extreme PTSD from his role in the awardwinning film “The Wicker Man.” Meanwhile, Campus Police handcuffed Benson with a rubber band and escorted the protesting bee out of the auditorium. Benson was arrested for torturing Cage, according to Sgt. Hon Nee. He also said the film was “so

Cage screams as he is attacked by bees.

terrible, it’s abusive. He was getting arrested either way.” Those in the audience were unsure of what was happening. “I dozed off a lot, so I’m probably not the person to talk to,” said Paul Len, a junior pollen jock major. “I woke up to Cage’s screams. I’ll never forget that horrible yelling.” It’s a wonder, though, how anyone could take anything away from this event, as every time someone said the word “bee,” everything sped up.

Photo courtesy of Nicholas Cage

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March 29, 2017

Serving The College of New Jersey community since 1885

Environmental education on the rise at College By Thomas Infante Arts & Entertainment Editor

It was common to see people outside in shorts and T-shirts last month, as it happened to be the second warmest February in U.S. history, according to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. The unseasonably warm weather brought joy to some and panic to others. “It’s definitely not natural,” said Horacio Hernandez, a member of the Environmental Club and a junior sociology major. “I never remember it being that warm in the winter when I was a kid, which wasn’t that long ago.” February’s higher-than-average-temperature correlates with a larger global pattern of climate change. Last year was the hottest year on record — the third consecutive year to break the yearly temperature record, according to NASA and NOAA. With two minors and the Environmental Club, there are a few ways students can become more environmentally conscious. “We want our activities to

Natalie La Spisa / Staff Photographer

The Environmental Club analyzes properties of the College’s lakes and streams. help others understand what sustainability really means and entails,” said Liz Eisenhauer, Environmental Club president and a senior statistics major. “Whether or not you feel it’s important to help depends on how much you care about the future,” Eisenhauer added. “It often feels like environmental concerns get sidelined by the media

and the general public.” While the club’s members are working to keep Earth sustainable, not all students see it as a priority. “I think environmental conservation is important, and I think most people would agree,” said Joey Stambouly, a freshman economics major. “The climate is definitely changing and it’s unsettling to an extent.”

Although Stambouly considers issues related to conservation important, he makes “no effort” to help conserve. “I don’t do it because I live in a first world country and I don’t have to,” Stambouly said. “Maybe I would do things differently if I was in Africa, but I don’t live in Africa.” For those who do want to get

Destruction of 2011 Japanese quake echoes through Mayo

Photo courtesy of Nicole Poccia

Miyagi Prefectural Sendai Minami High School choir sings in Mayo.

By Elizabeth Zakaim Reviews Editor

Despite the distracting beauty of the Riverside Church in New York, music rehearsal was starting to drag as choirs from both the College and two Japanese high schools were working hard to tackle every lyric their music threw at them. The College choirs and Japanese high school choruses held their sixth annual East Meets West concert in Mayo Concert

Hall on the evening of March 20. The concert was a project of Hand in Hand, an organization established after the Great East Japan Earthquake in 2011 that spreads awareness and comfort to those affected by the earthquake through musical performances throughout Japan and the United States. Under the project’s wing, two Japanese high school choirs traveled to the U.S. to perform at the College as well as the Lincoln Center in New York City on

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Wednesday, March 22. The students in the Japanese high school choirs are from Tohoku, Japan, which was a region greatly affected by the earthquake, according to John Leonard, the director of choirs and an associate professor of music at the College. Many of them have lost family members, friends and homes in the area, he said. For the students in the College’s choir, it was hard to learn the Japanese words to the songs, but both groups were intent on learning not just their music, but more about each other. For Alyse Watson, a member of the College’s Chorale and a junior early childhood and Spanish double major, it was hard to break the language barrier and get to know the Japanese students. That did not stop her from trying, though. During a break in rehearsal, Watson and a friend were playing a hand game. One of the Japanese students sitting next to her expressed an interest in the game. “Just how they remember the ones they love through song, it was really special to share in that,” she said. Leonard was able to travel to Japan last year to work with the singers and conductors there before they flew to this country to perform. He developed a close friendship with Atsushi Yamada, the maestro

involved, the Environmental Club organizes events to help on both a local and national scale. Throughout Earth Week, the week before Earth Day on April 22, the club coordinates many activities for students on campus. The club is also organizing its first trip to Washington D.C. on April 29 for the People’s Climate March. “Many issues related to the environment are related to other large socio-economic issues,” said Ridwan Khan, a member of the Environmental Club and a sophomore biology major. “This stuff is relevant to everyone.” The club also puts together stream walks, during which the club tours through the streams that stem from the lakes on campus. “We conduct an ecological investigation of the streams,” Hernandez said. “We check for debris and pollution, as well as the health of the water. People don’t tend to think of the streams as important, but there is a cascade effect of pollution once it reaches a larger body of water, such as our lakes.” see GREEN page 5

Speaker reveals health care sham By Ashton Leber Social Media Editor

A New York Times best-selling author, renowned journalist and health insurance insider visited the College to discuss the past and future of health care and its affects on March 21. “How many of you have ever said the Affordable Care Act, better known as Obamacare, was a government takeover of health care?” Wendell Potter asked a crowd of students and faculty in room 212 of the Education Building. Potter revealed that story was a fabrication by insurance companies. “Tens of millions believed it, and millions of us still do,” Potter said. “Well, guess what? It was nowhere close to the truth. It was, and still is, fake news. And I was partly responsible for spreading it.” Upon returning to his journalism career, Potter served as vice president of corporate communications for a leading health insurance group, Cigna. There, he helped create and implement Cigna’s many public relations campaigns that were designed to “make you think, act and vote in ways the (insurance companies) wanted you to.” It all started 10 years ago on the 16th floor of One

see EAST page 14 Arts & Entertainment / page 14

see HEALTH page 3

Features / page 19

Sports / page 28

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Men’s Tennis August nets 100th win of Lions career

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page 2 The Signal March 29, 2017

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 3

Health / Insurers deceive public, former insider says continued from page 1 Liberty Place in Philadelphia, where Potter had a secret meeting with his former employer, Cigna, and several other top PR executives from health insurance companies. Ten days before the meeting, director Michael Moore premiered his documentary “Sicko” in France, which exposed how poorly the U.S. health care system fared compared to other countries. “‘Sicko’ was not about the growing number of uninsured Americans, but was about people who had insurance and still couldn’t afford to get the care they needed,” Potter said. The secret meeting was arranged because Americans’ attitudes toward health care were shifting negatively. Pollster Bill McInturff presented at the meeting a recent national poll he conducted providing evidence that Americans doubted private insurance companies. “The poll showed that the government should do more to solve the many problems that plagued the American health care system,” Potter said. Mike Tuffin of America’s Health Insurance Plan and Robert Schooling of the Washington PR firm APCO Worldwide flew to Philadelphia to “discredit (‘Sicko’) and the movie maker,” Potter said. Potter said APCO was a master of deception, and it discussed in a 1995 pamphlet “how the firm helped corporations advance their goals by influencing lawmakers, drafting legislation, regulations and creating business correlations tailored to specific issues.” AHIP and APCO created an impressive PR strategy that would shift the media’s focus away from Moore and position the insurance companies as part of the solution rather than the problem, according to Potter. The front group created by

Aaron Wilson-Watson / Staff Photographer

Potter unveils the myths perpetuated by American health care companies. APCO would be called “Health Care America” and would lead the effort in changing American minds after the release of “Sicko” in the U.S. The money for Health Care America came from the pockets of Americans paying their insurance premiums. Due to the immense outcome of this strategic campaign, Moore’s film did not do as well as anticipated, according to Potter. “Not a single reporter had done enough investigative work to find out that the insurance industry was behind it all. We fooled everybody,” Potter said. But what does this have to do with today? Everything, according to Potter. Using a similar campaign strategy used against “Sicko,” health care insurance groups would once again influence the debate of the Affordable Care Act — now known as Obamacare. The companies denounced the health care reform legislation, promoting it as a “government takeover of health care,” he said. Potter said millions of people

believed it, but, in fact, Obamacare “solidified the role private insurance companies play in our health care system.” According to Potter, Obamacare forced insurance companies to become more consumer focused. “The industry has really thrived over the past eight years,” Potter said. “The share price of the biggest insurance company, UnitedHealthcare, has increased a stunning 1,000 percent since the early days of the Obama administration.” Compared to the insurance companies, the pharmaceutical companies spent “$275 million to lobby Congress and the White House in 2009.” Potter said that according to the Center of Responsive Politics, it’s the most money spent on lobbying in a single year. Compared to other countries, American’s pay more for prescription medications. Millions of people to this day still believe that Obamacare is a government takeover, but it has, instead, made a positive difference in the lives of the American people, according to Potter.

The new administration is repealing and replacing Obamacare for what is now introduced as the American Health Care Act. Many groups, including the American Medical Association, American Hospital Association and AARP, have come out against the new health care system, Potter said. Although these industries are being overt, the insurance companies are silent. Potter believed that was because they were working behind the scenes to get the new health care bill passed, which would allow them to make more money. Before Obamacare was passed, Potter said many insurance companies sold “junk” insurance with spotty coverage “because it was very profitable and they would like to be able to sell it again. With the current reform debate in Washington, insurance companies smell an opportunity to get rid of those pesky new rules.” If the new bill was passed, insurance companies would be able to sell sky-high policies with skimpy benefits, according to Potter.

“Even if the American health care act passes the house this week, the chances of it getting through the Senate in its current configuration are pretty slim,” Potter said. This is because many people on both sides of the aisle believe it would not benefit low- and middle-class families. Potter’s prediction never had a chance to come to fruition. Speaker of the House Paul Ryan pulled the bill before it had a chance to pass in the House of Representatives on Saturday, March 25, according to CNN. Potter said there isn’t a reason to expect much progress at the moment. The only way he can foresee progress is if the American people become “better informed and well-engaged citizens,” which he hopes can be achieved through the launch of his new site, Tarbell.org. Named after investigative journalist Ida Tarbell, Potter hopes to point out to solutions in changing the way we perceive health care. “Despite everything I said today, I am hopeful we can create the world’s best health care system,” Potter said. His latest book, “Nation on the Take: How Big Money Corrupts Our Democracy and What we can do About it,” emphasizes how Americans can take a stand. “We need to work together to be sure it’s disrupted in our favor and not just Wall Street’s,” Potter said. Potter believes coming together is the key to reforming America’s health care system. “I’m convinced that when we come together and work across party lines — which can happen and is happening in places around the country — we can bring costs under control,” Potter said. “We can make certain that every one of us has access to quality care we can afford.”

Hawaiian stargazing and College logo inspire new art installation By Megan Kelly Staff Writer Student Government held its weekly meeting on Wednesday, March 22, to discuss a new art piece, the T-shirt Swap and the Adirondack chair project. Kate Kaman and Joel Erland, silversmiths in Philadelphia, presented their plans for an art installation in the Brower Student Center. The design features a 6-foot circular LED screen with brass discs branching off of the screen made to resemble the sun and its rays. The screen will display the position of the sun and phases of the moon, working as a digital sun and moon calendar. The art piece will be cast into a 20-foot by 15-foot concrete wall and covered by a piece of tempered glass that is one-half inch thick to protect the piece from the elements and vandals. “All of the sensitive electronics will be on the climatecontrolled side of the wall and the exterior side, which is still inside its own waterproof housing, you have… outdoor rated LEDs, which are rated for 50,000 hours or 10 years, so they’re designed to be re-lighted every 10 years,” Erland said. Kaman and Erland found inspiration for the design in the College’s logo. “This logo — this shield with the lion and the sun — this was the original inspiration (for the design),” Kaman said. Erland also credited visiting Hawaii and stargazing as inspiration for them to design something that tracked the positions of the sun. Kaman and Erland also decided not to name the piece, as they figured that the student body would come up with their own name despite

SG discusses the incoming art installation inside the student center. it having an official name. The student body will have the opportunity to come up with name suggestions before SG will vote for the piece. “Basically what we’re going to do is create a Google form and it’ll be an open-comment sort of thing,” said Kevin Kim, executive president of SG. After the presentation, Vice President of Student Services Lindsay Thomas reminded everyone that the T-shirt Swap will take place on Wednesday, March 29, from 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. Vice President of Community Relations Michael O’Connor announced that the Adirondack chair project had to be delayed due to unforeseen costs. “There were some things that weren’t accounted for, and I think what I’m going to do is reduce the amount of

Jason Proleika / Photo Editor

chairs that we originally wanted to be able to afford that,” O’Connor said. O’Connor also announced that the PB&J Race will take place on April 13 from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. Teams of five will compete to make as many peanut butter and jelly sandwiches as possible in a certain amount of time. All of the sandwiches will be donated to the Trenton Area Soup Kitchen. The deadline to register for the race is Friday, March 31, and it costs $20 per team to join. The Class of 2019 was fully funded for a digital scavenger hunt. An app will be developed specifically for the hunt and students will go around and find the listed places, people or things. A date for the event and prize for the winner has yet to be determined, but they hope to schedule it for a Sunday in April.

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March 29, 2017 The Signal page 5

Green / Students learn to conserve through minors and clubs continued from page 1 In terms of what the average person can do to help on a regular basis, members of the club offered simple tips, such as turning off lights after leaving a room and properly recycling. “I joined the club after asking myself ‘What can I do from where I am?’” Hernandez said. While the College used to have an interdisciplinary concentration in environmental studies, the minor was implemented in the Fall 2015 semester. The environmental studies minor aims to educate students about the environment from a scientific and technological standpoint, as well as provide social and historical context to common environmental issues, according to Bates. “We’re trained to think of environmental change as purely biological, but it isn’t,” Bates said. “So, many people don’t understand why people don’t care or pay attention to these problems, especially scientists who are angry that public policy doesn’t reflect the findings of their data.” For all the cynicism that surrounds these issues, Bates focuses on the progress made so far and is confident that more is to come. “Individual actions help, but the biggest environmental harms are structural and institutional problems of overusing resources,” Bates said. “Everyone gets

The campus is home to abundant flora.

depressed about the environment, but the EPA has only existed since 1970. We’ve come so far in a relatively short time.” Bates hopes that future generations of students will realize the importance of preserving the environment and start to engage in discussion of what can be done to help. “People need to see beyond basic decisions like whether or not to buy a hybrid car,” Bates said. “You can’t buy your way out of this situation.” Bates is hopeful for the future, but said the Trump administration has been “in complete denial” about the environmental impact of America’s business interests. “We have the luxury of choosing whether or not to take action,” Bates said. “By not acting now, we are inadvertently making that decision for future generations to come who will be forced to do

Jason Proleika / Photo Editor

something about it.” Lauren Madden, an assistant professor of education and the coordinator of the environmental sustainability education minor, agreed with Bates about how environmentalism is more than just a matter of science. “It’s odd that it is a political issue in the U.S.,” Madden said. “In most countries, people generally agree with their scientists, but here it is marginalized for other issues. If you really want to make a difference, call your elected official to voice your opinion about these matters.” The environmental sustainability education minor is a five-course program designed to help education majors teach ecological issues in a classroom setting, according to a pamphlet about the minor. Several faculty members in the School of Education decided there should be

a program to help future teachers learn about environmental sustainability, and, thus, the minor was launched in the Spring 2015 semester, according to Madden. “Americans are wasteful,” Madden said. “We only have one planet. Understanding how to care for it is critical to our survival.” There are currently 12 students enrolled in the minor and four who have completed it since spring 2015, according to Madden. Madden is concerned about the future. “We can expect to see more rapid changes in coming years,” Madden said. “Sea levels are rising continuously, but it’s possible that change will be imperceptible over time. We can’t predict how Earth will react and recover to the damage humans do to it.” These complex effects are hitting close to home. “They tested the water and air of Trenton and found higher-than-average levels of pollution,” Madden said. “In this case, environment and economy are intertwined because of the socioeconomic situation of Trenton.” Despite this, Madden expressed hope in the next generation of students to make progress in the field. “So long as the EPA exists, we might continue to do good,” Madden said. “It’s simple to just list everything that’s wrong — we have the capacity to innovate in this field like no one ever has before.”

SFB retreat to occur on campus due to lack of funds By Olivia Rizzo Staff Writer

Students can look forward to experiencing a variety of different perspectives in the next few months as the Student Finance Board funded several speakers at its weekly meeting on Wednesday, March 22. College Union Board received $2,440.03 for its previously tabled food truck and lawn games request as part of CUB’s Block Party. The organization had already been approved for $6,901.48 in funding for the event, the addition of new funds brings the full price of CUB’s Block Party to $9.341.51. The event will feature an ice cream truck, live music, lawn games and the College’s flea market. It will take place on April 20 on Green Lawn at 6 p.m. “The events barbecue theme can only be enhanced through the addition of a barbecue food truck,” said Stephanie DiPietrantonio, CUB STUD event coordinator. “The lawn games are also being presented again because upon reaching out to other organizations for them, we found that no other organizations had the games we plan for.” Funding will cover the costs of barbecue food trucks and lawn games. The American Medical Student Association was funded $699.95 for its Hippocrates Luncheon, which will take place on Sunday, April 2, in room 212 of the Education Building. “We invite a panel of TCNJ alumni physicians and we go through the office of alumni affairs,” said Sapana Shah, president of AMSA. “This lunch will

provide TCNJ students with how to approach the health care field and what goes into being in the health care field, what resources are available at TCNJ for those looking to enter the health care field and allows for networking.” Funding will cover the cost of food and decorations. PRISM was funded for two Breaking the Binary events: a film series that will take place on April 22 at 7:30 p.m. in the Decker Social Space and a speaker on campus in April at a to-be-determined location. “There are two films: ‘Ma Vie En Rose’ and ‘Mala Mala,’ both are about trans youth,” said Karissa Schoemer, PRISM’s treasurer. “The films are a blend of documentaries and dramas and will provide students with an understanding of the ways in which gender and sex exist on a spectrum.” The film series received full funding in the amount of $500. “For our Breaking the Binary Speaker series, we will bring in speakers who identify as trans, transgender or intersex,” Schoemer said. “PRISM requested to bring two speakers to campus, but the board decided to grant PRISM $1,500 to fund the cost of one speaker due to the projected audience size.” The speaker series received $1,500 in funding, which will cover the cost of the speaker’s travel and speaking fees. Union Latina was funded $4,192.91 for COPA Night, which is scheduled for April 13 in the Decker Social Space at 7 p.m. “COPA is a celebration of Latin American cultures through performances, traditional Latin

SFB discusses its Base Budget Retreat.

food, music and Latin American history,” said Anasofia Terelles, the Union Latina’s multicultural awareness chair. “It really highlights what we stand for and who we are.” Funding will cover the cost of the food, DJ, band, photo booth and decorative pearls. All other decorations were tabled. Sigma Lamda Beta was fully funded $500 to bring Bobby Gonzalez, a multicultural speaker, to campus to talk about diversity. “Bobby Gonzalez is multicultural guest speaker from the Bronx, NYC,” said Alex Penafiel, treasurer of Sigma Lamda Beta. “What he is going to be talking to people about understanding diversity, allowing students to have a broader perspective on the topic, he wants to help students create and shape an equal future for all communities.” Funding will cover the cost of Gonzalez’s speaking fee. The Association of Students for Africa was fully funded $2,000 for its Akwaaba Banquet,

which will give the campus a taste of African food on April 22 in the Decker Social Space at 7:30 p.m. “Akwaaba is a term that originates from the West African country of Ghana and when translated, means ‘welcome,’” said Orealuwa Nubi, vice president of ASFA. “This event will showcase the African culture and will introduce students to the various elements of African culture through performances, music and food.” Funding will cover the costs of a traditional performance group. The Class of 2019 was fully funded $549 for its Digital Scavenger Hunt, which will take place at a date to be determined in April at noon. “We want to host a digital interactive scavenger hunt across campus. Students will have two hours to explore TCNJ’s hidden treasurers by scanning QR codes, checking in at locations and taking photos,” said Dominic Clark, vice president of Public Relations. Funding will cover the costs of Scavify Digital Scavenger Hunt

Jason Proleika / Photo Editor

and a prize for the winners. Friendship and Unity for Special Education’s request to bring David Finch, a humorist and New York Times best-selling author, to campus for a lecture on his experience with Asperger Syndrome and his work in the classroom was tabled. The board tabled the event due to concerns that the lecture would be too similar to the one Finch gave last year. SFB was fully funded $415 for its annual Base Budget Retreat, which is used to review budgets for the following year. “This is an annual retreat in order review base budgets for the next fiscal year and review new policies for our constitution,” said Robert Mitchals, executive director of SFB. “In the past we have held this event at a hotel off campus, and this year we will be hosting the retreat on campus in order to keep costs down.” Funding will cover the cost of snacks, drinks, pizza and breakfast. The retreat will take place on Friday, April 7, in Paul Loser Hall.

page 6 The Signal March 29, 2017

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Alumna discusses hidden advertisements in Brown Bag By Nicole DeStefano Staff Writer Anywhere the eye may wander, it is likely to come across an ad. While advertisements are everywhere, consumers are not always able to recognize them. Magazines are one of the many outlets in which advertisers try to reach their target audience. Alumna Annemarie Conte (’01), executive editor of Woman’s Day Magazine, spoke to students on Friday, March 24, in Mayo Concert Hall. Woman’s Day captivates more than 22 million readers with advice and ideas regarding health, family, food, relationships, home and style, according to its Facebook page. When talking to the students, Conte focused on both branded content and native advertising. “Why is branded content happening now?” Conte asked. Conte pointed to the rise of online media as the culprit. “Because you are not paying for content, so someone has to,” Conte said. “Advertising money is down, across the board. Advertising online is on the rise, so if advertisers cannot get people

Jason Proleika / Photo Editor

Conte discusses how advertising companies disguise their ads in magazines.

to read their advertisements, they have to find another way in.” Native advertising resembles the publication’s editorial content, but is paid for by an advertiser and intended to promote a product. Similarly, branded content is a type of advertising that uses the

generating of content as a way to promote the particular brand that funds a content’s production. “So, basically, advertisers pay for placement or the ability to give directional guidance within an editorial or format that mimics editorial,” Conte said. “Branded content tends to be more digital

and native advertising tends to be more print, but they’re basically interchangeable and can depend on whatever the client wants.” Native advertising is used mostly by big media companies because smaller companies do not have the resources, Conte said. Conte also said companies and

brands use social media platforms like Instagram for advertisement. For example, Lord & Taylor bought a campaign in March 2015 and labeled it as paid content. The company paid “influencers” between $1,000 and $4,000 to post a photo of themselves in a specific dress with the designer hashtag and “@Lord&Taylor” in their caption. Lord & Taylor approved every image and every post, but in March 2016, the Federal Trade Commission ruled against Lord and Taylor, stating that its advertisements were not clear, and its actions went against rules that were in place since 2009. The FTC could have hit them with a debilitating fine, but, instead, put them in a temporary “penalty box.” “This campaign reached 11.4 million uniques in two days on Instagram and the dress sold out,” Conte said. “It was very effective.” While traditional advertising is still popular, sponsored articles dressed up to appear to be part of the editorial content of a specific site are not only becoming more common, but proving to be successful for many companies.

Renowned physicist proposes more diversity in science By George Tatoris News Editor

One day, Sylvester James Gates, a professor of physics at the University of Maryland and a pioneer in the field of supersymmetry, was observing one of his classes solve a physics problem in groups. One group of three caught Gates’s eye. While two students were fighting in front of the chalkboard over how to solve the problem — “spinning their wheels,” according to Gates — the third stepped up to the board, scribbled an equation and sat back down without a word. It took the two others a moment to notice what the third had written, but when they did, they realized it was the correct answer. The next class the same thing happened, but this time one of the two at the board turned to the third and asked, “How did you guess that?” “I don’t guess,” the third said. Gates noted that the two students at the chalkboard were a part of the majority demographic of the class, however, the third was a part of the minority. Gates shared this story at the second annual Barbara Meyers Pelson ’59 Lecture — entitled “Einstein v. Roberts, Diversity & Faculty Engagement” — on March 21 in Mayo Concert Hall. He was there to explain the importance of diversity in a science class. Gates holds a Ph.D. in physics from MIT and was the first African-American to hold an endowed chair in physics at a major university in the U.S. He also coauthored “Superspace, or One Thousand and One Lesson in Supersymmetry,” the first comprehensive book written on supersymmetry, an attempt to fill the holes in the current Standard Model of the universe. Between his research and media appearances in NOVA programs, Gates served on former President Barack Obama’s Council of Advisors on Science and Technology. In 2013, Obama awarded Gates the National Medal of Science for his contributions. Gates wrote an essay in 1995 on why diversity is important in science. It was entitled “Equity Vs. Excellence: A False Dichotomy In Science And Society,” and

since then, he’s been an advocating for more diversity. In Mayo, Gates first pointed to an example everyone in the audience could relate to — American styles of music. Rock ‘n’ roll, Gates said, was created by Western musicians “having a conversation” with African musicians. The styles of music blended to create something new and exciting. Like music, mathematics also has different styles, Gates said. Looking back at mathematical literature from centuries ago reveals a stylistic shift from today’s literature, according to Gates. If you have an eye for seeing these mathematical styles, you might also notice differences in literature across different countries, races and cultures. Gates also used the example of diversity in biology. The more diverse a species, the better equipped it is for survival. With more diversity comes more styles of thinking and viewing science. With more diversity, scientists can be better equipped to make discoveries. “Diversity enhances innovation. That’s what we learn from these examples,” Gates said. In the case of science, like with art, Gates believes imagination beats knowledge. “Knowledge is like a finite ball. It has an edge beyond which we don’t know the answers,” Gates said. “But If you come back in 10 years… you’ll notice we have more knowledge.” But how did the ball get bigger? The answer is imagination, according to Gates. Scientists need to think creatively or irrationally to create new knowledge, according to Gates. Reflecting on his time at MIT, he noted that whenever he’d get an answer right in class, it was because he was thinking “out in left field” away from everyone else. “Imagination is more important than knowledge because it’s the mechanism by which we increase it,” Gates said. Having access to a more diverse group of styles of thinking can really impact scientific progress. If there is just one or more people in a group of scientists that can think outside the box, the possibility of success increases greatly.

“If you’re trying to solve a problem where maybe one of those crazy ideas of yours is the exact key to solving the problem, that means collectively, if you’re looking at a group of scientists, the group is more capable of making progress,” Gates said. Gates referenced a world where there were only classical musicians. Such a world would be “much more limited,” he said. Diversity enriches music and much more. Sheen S. Levine, an assistant professor of organizations, strategy and international management at the University of Texas at Dallas, quantified Gates’s observations with an experiment involving traders and bubbles. Two groups — one homogenous and one heterogeneous — traded in the stock market. The more diverse group matched true prices 58 percent better than the homogenous group because members of the homogenous group were less likely to question their peers. The same experiment was conducted in North America and Asia. A well-known physicist and personal

idol of Gates, Albert Einstein, would have been overjoyed to see Levine’s results. Einstein was both a man of science and a man of conscience. He condemned racism. Einstein referred to racism as a “disease of white people” in a 1946 speech at Lincoln University in Pennsylvania, the first school in America to let blacks earn degrees. In a 2013 court case, Fisher v. University of Texas, the plaintiff fought affirmative action, claiming she was not let into the university because she was white. Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts, the judge in that case, asked in 2015, “What unique perspective does a minority student bring to a physics class?” Gates penned a response titled “Einstein v. Roberts,” identifying Einstein as another minority that brought a creative approach to science. “Why Einstein?” Gates asked. “Well, Einstein was Jewish and he lived in Germany as a child — that made him a minority, and, therefore, many of the kinds of things I experienced in my life, he had experienced as a child in Germany.”

Meagan McDowell / Staff Photographer

Gates believes imagination is the key to advancing knowledge.

Documentary and lecture tell lemurs’ tale page 8 The Signal March 29, 2017

Flickr

Left: Lemurs play a major role in Madagascar’s ecosystem. Right: Wright discusses the plight of the lemur. By Chloe Freed Correspondent Hosted by Phi Beta Kappa, a primatologist and distinguished service professor of anthropology at Stony Brook University talked about her efforts to repopulate Madagascar with lemurs at a lecture titled “Back from the Brink of Extinction: Saving Lemurs in Madagascar” on Wednesday, March 23. “We’re not finished yet with saving those lemurs,” Patricia Wright said. “I am hoping some you in the audience will help us out.” Growing up on a farm in upstate New York, Wright has always kept animals close to her heart. In the early ’70s, she had a pet monkey, which was her catalyst to studying animals. Through many negotiations and bargaining with National Geographic and other wildlife organizations, she was able to get

grants to travel to South America and study primates for her dissertation. The event began with a showing of the film “Island of Lemurs: Madagascar,” which features her work with conserving the Madagascar forests that lemurs call home. The film highlighted the bright culture of those who live in Madagascar and the evolutionary history of the lemur species. Wright also talked about her collaboration with Elwyn L. Simons, which led to the discovery of a new species of lemur, finding a presumed lost species of lemur and creating the Institute for the Conservation of Tropical Environments at Stony Brook to teach students about conservation and the Centre ValBio, a research campus in Madagascar’s Ranomafana National Park. “The model we have is a good, strong foundation of research,” Wright said of the national park. Along with her work with conservation,

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Wright works directly with the Madagascar people to ensure they can benefit from these efforts themselves. “We always work closely with the Madagascar people. It’s their islands. It’s their lemurs,” Wright said. Through health care, schools and financial aid, Wright and her colleagues have paid back the Madagascans for using their land. “We have tree nurseries in all the schools, and they’re doing great,” Wright said. Efforts are being made to improve the areas in Madagascar that are populated with lemurs that not only help the habitat, but the natives who call it home. Sara Martin, a senior chemistry major, found Wright’s efforts admirable and worthy of praise. “I think it is amazing that she did not only save the lemurs, but in the process of saving the lemurs, she was also helping the community around the lemurs,” Martin said.

Jason Proleika / Photo Editor

Students who attended the talk showed interest in the issue at stake. Izzy Distefano, a senior biology major, understands the importance of saving Madagascar’s lemurs. “I think it’s a very worthy cause,” Distefano said. “Lemurs are kind of this unique case of this super hallmark animal. … When you save the lemurs, you save all the plants, too.” The event brought awareness to a cause not many hear about on a daily basis. These expeditions are solely based on grants and donations that are given to Wright and her team. Through awareness, money is collected to go toward this issue. “We just raised $7 million to save lemurs,” Wright said. “Isn’t that wonderful?” Wright concluded the talk with exciting news for the audience. “I just discovered a lost rainforest,” Wright said, “This is one you’re going to hear about on the news.”

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 9

Nation & W rld

Israel threatens to destroy Syrian air defenses

Russia supplies Syria with anti-aircraft missiles as part of an air defense system.

By Paul Mulholland Staff Writer

Israeli Defense Minister Avigdor Lieberman threatened to destroy Syria’s air defense systems on March 19,

AP Photo

CNN reported. This threat came after an air raid in which the Syrian military fired anti-aircraft missiles at Israeli warplanes, according to CNN. Israeli jets targeted weapons being transferred to

Hezbollah, an Iranian supported Shia militia based in Lebanon that supports Syrian president Assad, AlMonitor, a Middle Eastern news source, reported. The air raid took place near Palmyra, Syria, according to Reuters. Russian special forces are believed to be operating alongside the Syrian army, the same source reported. Israel has bombed certain weapon transfers to Hezbollah within Syria in the past, and Syria has responded with anti-aircraft fire. In past instances, however, Israel never formally acknowledged the operation and did not issue a threat as Lieberman did, Al-Monitor reported. The Syrian military claims to have shot down one of four of the Israeli planes, although Israel disputes this claim, according to The Guardian. Israel said its air missile defense system, known as Arrow, intercepted a Syrian anti-aircraft missile and that all its planes returned safely, The Guardian reported. Following Lieberman’s threat to destroy Syria’s air defenses, an Israeli airstrike killed Yasser al-Sayed, a Druze militia leader allied with Assad, in the Syrian Golan Heights, according to Al-Monitor. Reports suggest that Assayed may also have been a Syrian air defense officer who was planning attacks on Israel, according to Haaretz, an Israeli newspaper. Russia, which supplies Syria’s air defense systems, summoned Israeli ambassador Gary Koren to Moscow to discuss the incident, according to CNN.

Senate divided on Trump’s Supreme Court pick By Jahnvi Upreti Staff Writer

Senate Democrats promised to filibuster the nomination of Neil M. Gorsuch for a position in the Supreme Court on Thursday, March 23. The movement was spearheaded by Democratic Minority Leader Sen. Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.), who said he refuses to vote for Gorsuch. Schumer questioned Gorsuch’s capability, stating Gorsuch is “not a neutral legal mind, but someone with a deep-seated conservative ideology,” The Washington Post reported. According to the same source, Gorsuch was nominated by the Trump administration to fill the vacant seat of the late Justice Antonin Scalia, who died in 2016. The 49-year-old conservative judge has served on the Denverbased U.S. Court of Appeals for

the last 10 years, The Washington Post reported. Gorsuch is facing scrutiny from Democrats for his conservative views on election laws and social justice issues, according to CNN. Kristen Clarke, head of the Lawyers’ Committee for Civil Rights Under Law, stated that Gorsuch’s mindset “reflects a narrow view of civil rights and a deep skepticism of protecting those rights in the courtroom,” The Washington Post reported. In order for Gorsuch to advance in his political journey and become a member of the Supreme Court, he must receive at least 60 votes in the Senate. However, there are currently only 52 Republicans in the Senate, CNN reported. In an effort to secure the nomination, Republicans are attempting to change the voting procedure, which has been utilized for decades,

Gorsuch is scrutinized by Senate Democrats for his conservative views.

to one that requires a simple majority rather than the required 60 votes, according to CNN. “If this nominee cannot earn 60 votes… the answer isn’t to change the rules. It’s to change the nominee,” Schumer said in response to the Republican’s desire to alter

the voting procedure, The Washington Post reported. Sen. Joe Manchin III (D-W. Va) is noted as the Democrat who is most likely vote in favor of Gorsuch’s nomination, according to The Washington Post. According to the same source,

AP Photo

Manchin stated that he will be visiting with Gorsuch shortly and will base his final decision off of that. Manchin warned Democrats not to prolong such strong opposition, as he believes “the Senate is on a slippery slope.”

China’s ‘Great Firewall’ keeps users from accessing Pinterest Chinese Pinterest users have avoided scrutiny from the Chinese government due to the site’s generally innocent nature, CNN reported. In both China and America, Pinterest is typically used as a place to find inspiration in fashion, recipes and creative projects. China wishes to protect its local social networks and internet companies. Banning Pinterest is a move used to preserve the economic viability of Chinese home industries, according to the Mercator Institute for Chinese Studies. According to the same source, similar measures have been used before in order to preserve Chinese internet-based companies. Twitter The Chinese government hopes that Pinterest is a popular platform for food, fashion and crafts. blocking access to Pinterest will lead ChiBy Jake Mulick sharing site Pinterest. na’s 731 million internet users to use doStaff Writer Pinterest has been accessible in China mestic sites instead of foreign competitors since the website’s inception, but access like Pinterest, CNN reported. The Chinese government has banned has been curtailed under China’s firewall, The ban coincides with this year’s meetthe popular social networking and image according to CNN. ing of China’s annual National People’s

Congress, which is a meeting of top legislators in China to discuss the domestic economic and political course of the country for the upcoming year, according to CNN. According to the same source, this meeting is often heavily scrutinized because it determines the movement of the world’s second largest economy, CNN reported. The same source reported that China is able to curtail the internet for their people because of the “Great Firewall,” a powerful device that allows the Chinese government to manipulate the internet in their mainland. The Chinese government uses this firewall to filter out specific keywords that represent certain Chinese ideals that the government might not agree with, such as Tibetan Independence and Tiananmen Square Massacre, CNN reported. The internet in China is streamed through three servers located in Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou, according to the Mercator Institute for Chinese Studies.

page 10 The Signal March 29, 2017

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March 29, 2017 The Signal page 11

Editorial

Campus Police: a great resource for students

Having to talk to students when they’re at their worst, Campus Police can often be perceived in a negative way. What the students don’t know is how funny and personable the officers can be. “I think the students are kind of afraid to look at us or speak to us a little bit, thinking that we’re going to ticket their car or lock somebody up,” Officer Orlando Segarra said. “We have to work hard to try and get their confidence up, so that they can trust us.” Officer Tania Ryan told me that when she walks around the campus on patrol, the kids freak out when she says “Hi” to them. “A lot of times, we carry this facade that we’re just angry,” Ryan said. “Although that may appear to be the case, we’re very approachable.” While a lot of students might perceive the presence of the officers on campus as strictly there to enforce the law, they don’t realize how much the officers really care about the students’ well-being. “I like when some of the kids are open enough to ask for advice about something,” Ryan said. “Or when they feel comfortable enough to say, ‘Hey, I’m having a bad day. I just need to sit here.’” After speaking with eight different Campus Police officers, I’ve learned that most of them have at least two kids. Some of the officers have children who are very young, and others have children who are in college Most of the officers mentioned that they love going home and spending time with their families, however, a lot of them spend 12-hour days making sure that the campus is safe. The officers also talked about their hobbies when they are off duty. In his free time, Lt. James Lopez likes to spend time outdoors with his sons. Lopez said he likes to go backpacking and has hiked the Grand Canyon with his boys. “Ideally, when I retire, I could just get a backpack and go,” Lopez said. “No phone. No email. No internet. No nothing.” In addition to hobbies, quite a few of the officers have had different careers before becoming an officer. Sgt. Bob Clement worked in finance on Wall Street for many years, but sought a career change after 9/11. Allen worked for the Department of Homeland Security for a while before he came to the College. “I love dealing with the students,” Allen said. “At the end of the day, it feels really good to go home knowing that I assisted and helped other people out.” Segarra worked at a smoke shop in Trenton, N.J., before he became a police officer in Camden, N.J. He said his brother was an officer for seven years when he decided to follow in his footsteps. Eventually, the department in Camden folded and went from a city to a county department. Ryan was originally a police officer in Camden, as well. Ryan and Segarra came to the College after the department change and have been happy ever since. Officer Philip Apgar wrote parking tickets down the shore, worked security for a casino and was security for a mental hospital before he worked at the College. Campus Police has also implemented a program called RAD, or Rape Aggression Defense systems. Sgt. Matt Mastrosimone said RAD is a 16hour self-defense training course that two officers, including Ryan, are certified to teach. Campus Police also likes to donate bikes, according to Interim Chief Tim Grant. Campus Police will hold onto any abandoned bikes they find on campus, and if those bikes aren’t claimed, they will donate them to a non-profit company. Recently, Campus Police donated bikes to Second Life Bikes in Asbury Park, N.J. The students should not be afraid to talk to Campus Police because the officers are regular people who just want to help. From my personal experience with Campus Police, and with police officers in general, I can honestly say that whether you are in a crisis situation or just looking for someone to talk to, don’t let fear keep you from reaching out to these amazing people. “It’s important to open up the lines of communication between Campus Police and the community,” Ryan said. “Even if it means being a little personable.” — Brielle Bryan Production Manager

Editorial Content Unsigned editorial opinions are those of the Editorial Board, which consists of the Editor-in-Chief, the Managing, News, Features, Arts & Entertainment, Opinions, Photo, Sports, Review and Social Media editors and the Business and Production managers, unless otherwise noted. Opinions expressed in signed editorials and letters to the editor are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Signal.

Photo courtesy of Sgt. Matt Mastrosimone

Mastrosimone enjoys spending time with his kids when he is off duty.

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In an article published last week entitled “Chabad and Hillel host Purim,” it was reported that in the Jewish story of Purim, Prime Minister Haman was King. The King was, in fact, named Ahasuerus, and he was neutral in his feelings toward the Jewish people whereas Haman wanted to exterminate them.

Quote of the week “Just how they remember the ones they love through song, it was really special to share in that.”

— Alyse Watson, a member of the College’s Chorale and a junior early childhood and Spanish double major

page 12 The Signal March 29, 2017

Opinions

Bee population dwindling at alarming rate By Heidi Cho Imagine a world without potatoes, watermelons or strawberries. Beware of this world — a world without bees. Imagine if bees went extinct due to individuals and companies underestimating the complexity of the environment. It’s already happening, and there needs to be awareness of the bees’ precarious situation. Bee populations began dropping in 2006. Colony collapse disorder plagued beekeepers’ bumblebee colonies, according to the Centre for Research on Globalization. Currently, habitat loss from pesticide use has pushed more than 700 bee species toward extinction, according the Center of Biological Diversity. Just this month, the rusty patched bumblebee officially became a critically endangered species, according to the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. To bring attention to this cause, General Mills removed the mascot, Buzz the Bee, from Honey Nut Cheerios cereal boxes to create buzz around the dropping bee population. To help bring back the bees, the company advertised the fact that they would give away free packets of wildflower seeds that bees like to visit. Cheerios gave away 1.5 billion seeds, blowing away the initial goal to give away 100 million seeds, according to the Cheerios website. In doing so, Cheerios failed to fully think through the consequences of sending the

The bee population has steadily decreased since 2006. same seed mix to different environmental regions. If you want to plant bee-friendly flowers without upsetting the environment, look at growtherainbow.com to find regionally specialized seeds. Cheerios’s seed packets included the California poppy, which is an invasive species in Tennessee, according to the USDA Natural Resources Conservation Service. This means that the poppy could be potentially harmful to the existing plant species in Tennessee, as it does not natively grow there. In Massachusetts, the Chinese ForgetMe-Not also included in the packet is

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banned and considered a noxious weed, according to the USDA Natural Resources Conservation Service. Even though Cheerios managed to publicize the plight of the bees, the company did not factor in the complexity of the environment when deciding how to help save the honey bees. Nature.com conducted a study that showed how honey bees, wild bees and pesticide-covered seeds interact in real life. It found that honey bees are not even the species most affected by pollutants and human activity. That title goes to solitary bees, such

as those belong in the andrenidae family that burrow underground. The American Association for the Advancement of Science studied which bees best enhance fruit crops and found that of 41 different crop systems, wild bees like andrenid bees, accounted for 86 percent of the increased crop yield. Commercialized bees only accounted for 14 percent. To top it off, andrenid bees are one of the most common five families of wild bees, according to the pamphlet entitled “Bee Basics: An Introduction to Our Native Bees” published by the USDA Forest Service and Pollinator Partnership. They rarely sting and are native to America. There are several popular misconceptions about bees that are a part of the underlying problem: a lack of concern and basic education about how the environment and food system works. There are 4,000 different species of bees native to North America, according to “Bee Basics.” The image of the honey bee as the most important kind of bee in America is false, as it is not even native to America, according to the USDA Forest Service. To be better environmentalists, we shouldn’t just care about the environment and other creatures when they are on the brink of extinction. It’s important to cultivate a culture that understands our place in the environment.

Watching Netflix inhibits students’ social lives

Netflix is a large part of students’ lives.

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By Michelle Lampariello Netflix and other streaming services are a constant in the life of nearly every college student. The concept of unlimited movies and TV shows is enticing, but it is this limitlessness that causes streaming services to take up so much of our busy lives. While using streaming services in moderation is healthy, college students often use them too heavily. Binge watching and addiction to streaming services is preventing many college students from having a healthy social life. Addiction to Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime and other streaming services often prevent people from making plans with friends. Many students would rather click “next episode” than walk down the hall to see their friends.

Some students will say in a tongue-in-cheek way that their plans for the night are to watch Netflix and stay in bed. While this statement used to render judgement from their peers, it is now considered a normal way to spend the night. Especially in a college setting, Netflix causes people to shut their doors, put their headphones on and not talk to their friends. Streaming services establish the norm that if you have nothing to do, you should watch an episode of a TV show instead of see a friend. I do agree that nights in are often much needed. A night in, however, does not mean that students should default to watching TV or a movie. There are plenty of other ways to spend a night in that do not feed into addictive binge watching. Spending multiple nights a week falling asleep to Netflix, as I know many of my friends do, is not healthy. Instead of having social interactions with housemates or roommates, students often cannot control the urge to watch their favorite show. I noticed during my first semester at the College that students often turned to streaming services as a source of comfort. Not only did watching a familiar show soothe homesickness, but it eliminated loneliness. While streaming services can be used in moderation to help students adjust to a new setting, it often ends up hindering more than helping. At first, it is OK to spend some free time watching a show in order to cope with a new schedule and setting. As time goes on, however, addiction to streaming services starts to get in the way of possible outings or gatherings with friends. In order to avoid falling into this trap, I do my best to limit how much time I spend using streaming services

while I am at school. While I do use Netflix more heavily while I am home on breaks, I spend less than one hour a week on streaming services when I’m at the College. I find that this helps me avoid staying in my room alone. Not only does it promote me to have a healthier social life, but it also helps me stay productive academically. During my first semester, I occasionally watched an episode of “Scrubs” as I was adjusting to my new environment. It helped me feel less homesick and eliminated some of the stress that I had as I tried to figure out a routine. But now, I am happy with the Netflix limits that I set for myself. If more students weaned themselves off of streaming services, they would see improvements in all aspects of their life, but especially in their social lives. Next time, try to knock on a friends door instead of clicking “next episode.” I promise you’ll have more fun.

Netflix can keep students from socializing.

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The Signal is published weekly during the academic year and is financed by the Student Activities Fee (SAF) and advertising revenue. Any student may submit articles to The Signal. Publication of submitted articles is at the discretion of the editors. The letters section is an open forum for opinions. Submissions that announce events or advertise in any way will not be printed. All letters should be sent via email to signal@tcnj.edu. Handwritten letters should be sent to The Signal, c/o The Brower Student Center, The College of New Jersey, PO Box 7718 Ewing, N.J. 08628 or placed in our mailbox in the Student Life Office. Letters must be received by the Friday before publication and should not exceed 300 words. The Signal reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity. All letters must be signed, with a phone number and address of the author. Requests to withhold the author’s name will be honored only if there is a legitimate reason. All materials submitted become the sole property of The Signal. The editors reserve the right to edit or withhold all articles, letters & photographs. The Signal willingly corrects factual mistakes. If you think we have made an error, please contact The Signal at (609) 771-2424, write to the address listed above or email us at signal@tcnj.edu.

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 13

Students share opinions around campus “Does Netflix interfere with your social life?”

Mia Ingui / Opinions Editor

Brian Lenz, a freshman finance major.

“No. If anything, it enables it, because we can have movie nights and use Netflix to make that happen.”

Mia Ingui / Opinions Editor

Maria Fegley, a sophomore graphic design major. “I’d say no. I balance it pretty well.”

“Should we help save the bees?”

Mia Ingui / Opinions Editor

Jenna Hartman, a freshman elementary urban education major with a specialization in iSTEM. “We should save the bees. The bees are our friends.”

Mia Ingui / Opinions Editor

Chuck Vicente, a freshman finance major. “Of course.”

The Signal’s student cartoons of the week...

page 14 The Signal March 29, 2017

Arts & Entertainment

Performers enthrall spectators at CUB Alt

Kimberly Ilkowski / Staff Writer

Left: Farren’s bombastic playing captivates the audience. Right: Eskimeaux ends the night with a more relaxing set. By Kimberly Ilkowski Staff Writer In a space like a college dormitory basement, there’s an “anything goes” mentality. Free of the pressures and expectations of traditional shows, artists are able to share more sincere sides of themselves and experiment with their music in a way that could only be embraced by a campus community. Rightfully so, each artist who performed at the latest CUB Alt installment on March 21 debuted new songs never before played in front of a live audience. Philly favorites Hurry, the charismatic Chris Farren and headliner Eskimeaux all tried out new material during their sets in the Decker Social Space. Led by Matt Scottoline, pop alternative outfit Hurry has risen in the scene following its 2016 album “Guided Meditation.” The band played a handful of songs from this release like “Fascination” and “When

I’m With You,” as well as “Oh Whitney” off of 2014’s “Everything/Nothing.” The band keeps things simple, lyrically and musically, allowing for catchy, uptempo tracks straightforward enough to be widely accessible — and Hurry certainly never underestimates the power of a positive, well-crafted pop song. Hurry has been in the studio recording its next record, and the crowd got a glimpse of the new power pop material when the band played several new songs, including one aptly about being on your cell phone. “I’m trying a few new things, but it’s not drastically different,” Scottoline said in an interview with The Signal after the show. “So, if you liked ‘Guided Meditation,’ then I hope you’ll like this and hopefully there’s ever more to like about it.” Scottoline and the rest of the trio feel fortunate about where the last few years have taken them and who has stuck around for the ride. “We’ve just been very lucky ‘cause I

think you can always try to make the best music you can make, but there’s a lot of people who make great music, and they don’t get lucky breaks,” Scottoline said. One of Hurry’s biggest supporterturned-close-friend was the evening’s next billed artist Chris Farren. The two are both known for their larger-than-life social media presence, which begged the question of what the pair was up to while Farren stayed in town with Scottoline. “It’s not that exciting, last night we stayed up kind of late talking,” Scottoline said and then laughed. “And then we got tired and went to sleep.” When Farren took the stage following Hurry’s performance, the ordinary portrait Scottoline painted melted into the background. With enough stage presence to power a full band, Farren embarked on the show solo with guitar in hand. Farren focused on material from 2016’s “Can’t Die” and played songs such as “Say U Want Me,” “Still Beating” and the instant crowd

pleaser “Human Being.” His extra long guitar cord allowed him to explore the space fully, at times wailing on his electric or making his way across every inch of the stage. In a change of pace, Farren also played “Where U Are” off of a 2015 EP and toned it down a notch for the mellowed out “I’m Not You.” At one point, Farren took his equally as long microphone cord and ran into the audience, laid down on the floor and played different sounds off his sample pad. Later, he found himself walking completely through the crowd and to the back of the room to hang off the support beams. His style of unabashed, energetic revelry made for an absolutely captivating performance. In an interview after his performance, Farren discussed what went into the making of “Can’t Die,” released via Side One Dummy. See ROCK on page 15

East / Students bond through culture of music continued from page 1 from Japan who wrote the Hand in Hand theme song the choirs performed together at the end of the concert. Since the College became a part of the Hand in Hand concert five years ago, Leonard has since developed a friendship with Yamada. “Just to break down the language barrier and get to know other singers, other musicians… from other countries and then perform at an extremely high level at Lincoln Center together is really cool,” Leonard said. The Japanese choir from Miyagi Prefectural Sendai Minami High School performed a moving song, “Wasenedeya,” which translates to “Don’t Forget,” which brought tears to the eyes of many audience members. The song was written to honor those lost in the earthquake. One member of the choir had stayed home from school the day of the earthquake, and she, her family and her home were washed away. Her remains were found in the wreckage a

few days later, according to the event program. In the middle of the song, one student briefly spoke over the undertones of the choir. “We lost many people we couldn’t possibly do without,” she said as the rest of the choir and the conductor bowed their heads. “We will never forget them.” Freshman psychology major Elisa Liang heard about the event through the Japanese Student Association on campus and was glad she came. “The first song (‘Wesenedeya’) actually made me cry,” said Liang, who was not expecting to be so touched by the song and the tragedy it commemorated. Members of the College Choir, one of the College’s choral groups, joined the Chorale, the more advanced chorus, and the Japanese choirs onstage to sing the Hand in Hand finale. “I was blown away. … (The Japanese student choirs) were so loud and powerful,” said Cayla Maratea, a member of the College Choir and a junior elementary education and history double major.

Sophomore communication studies major Kelly Scheper was impressed with not just the Japanese students’ performance, but also how well they adapted to the unfamiliarity of a new country they have never visited before. As a member of College choir for four semesters, Scheper was glad to see some fresh faces occupying Mayo’s concert hall stage. “It’s not everyday that people from Japan come and sing here,” she said. “We’ve been doing it for a while now, so we’re used to

doing it out there.” These performances were different, though, as they were a cultural experience. She enjoyed the Fukushima Prefectural Yumoto High School choir’s performance of “The Sound of Music,” which the students sang in Japanese. Students from both of the College’s choral groups felt a connection with the Japanese high school students, despite their cultural differences. “I just love music and being

able to be a part of something that’s so much bigger than yourself,” Watson said. Having the opportunity to meet people that are so different from herself and getting the chance to learn about their world was made even more special because both groups shared something in common that brought them all together despite any differences — music. “Being able to express our love for music together — it’s really neat,” she said.

The choirs learn about each other’s cultures in their interactions.

Photo courtesy of handinhand.org

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 15

‘Beauty’ remake falls short of animated classic

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Left: The actors look the part in ‘Beauty and the Beast.’ Right: Lumiere and Cogsworth are animated in a more realistic manner. By Brielle Bryan Production Manager A young, beautiful woman held against her will in a locked room by an aggressive, beastly captor — does this situation sound romantic or disconcerting? In Disney’s live-action remake of “Beauty and the Beast,” Belle (Emma Watson) is supposedly strong-minded, well-read and seeking adventure outside her provincial town. When Belle’s screw-up father, Maurice (Kevin Kline), walks into a dangerous looking castle, steals the owner’s property and gets caught, it’s no wonder the owner, the Beast, is furious and locks him up. If someone stole the most beautiful rose from my garden, I would be pretty upset, too. Belle trades her own personal freedom to save her father from the mess he got himself into. While this was a brave move, it was also really stupid. Maybe, instead of walking herself straight into the Beast’s lair, she could have gone back

to the village and gathered reinforcements to charge the castle and save her father. That would not have given the writers the opportunity to get Belle and the Beast together, though. Watson does a lovely job playing Belle with her fair beauty and ability to portray a strong, independent woman. In the midst of pretending to be Belle, however, she forgot about the overall message of the film that she was endorsing. While Watson, a hardcore women’s rights activist, thought she was embodying a strong, capable woman, she was really portraying the unequivocal underlying message of how a man’s freedom is more important than a woman’s freedom. “Beauty and the Beast” has been rewritten and adapted in different versions since French novelist Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve wrote the traditional fairy tale in 1740, “La Belle et la Bête.” Before the live-action film, the most recent adaptation of “Beauty and the

Beast” was the animated version released in 1991. While entrancing and entertaining, the animated “Beauty and the Beast” did have many plot holes: not one person in Belle’s village knew of the castle nearby or any of the people who lived in the castle who had been turned into inanimate objects. No one noticed Belle missing or tried to help Maurice find her. The live-action remake fixes some of the confusing plot holes in the animated film. I always found it confusing how, in the animated film, the Beast had to fall in love before he turned 21 in order to become a prince again. His time was almost up, and he had already been cursed for 10 years –– this would have made him a 10-year-old child when the entrantress placed the curse on him for being vain. Yet as a 10-year-old, he still had potential to grow out of his arrogance and selfishness. The live-action film did, however, make mistakes of its own when it allowed Watson to sing.

While Watson wasn’t a bad pick for the look of Belle, she was absolutely terrible when it came to the vocals. Belle is supposed to encompass beauty in every way –– appearance, spirit and voice. While Watson’s vocals were a let down, all of the other major leads made up for where she was lacking. Gaston (Luke Evans), the narcissistic man who wants to marry Belle, had excellent vocals, but was a little disappointing when it came to acting. In the animated film, Gaston was very over the top and into himself, which is how he is supposed to be portrayed. In the live-action remake, Gaston just seems lovesick. The writers of the remake also altered many of the lines of the new film, which took away from the rhythm and tone they were trying to replicate from its animated predecessor. In the animated version, one of the best lines in the film was when Maurice told Belle that she was ahead of her time. Maurice had a similar line in the live-action

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film that was squished into the middle of a long monologue, taking away from its value. The choreography was well done in the live-action remake, as well. The love between Belle and the Beast was conveyed more intricately in the live-action dance scene while Mrs. Potts quietly serenades them with “Tale As Old As Time.” Gaston and his sidekick LeFou’s (Josh Gadd) famous song “Gaston” also had excellent energy and choreography. The characters in the pub dance rhythmically on the tables and across the wooden floors of the small room as they praise Gaston’s beauty. Definitely see the live-action remake of “Beauty in the Beast” if you’re looking to see some incredible computer-generated imagery and decent choreography. Otherwise, the script, acting and Watson’s vocals were subpar. Overall, the movie was full of color and energy, and I hope to be even more impressed with future classic Disney live-action remakes.

Rock / Bands debut new material and fan favorites continued from page 14

“Recording was awesome and weird and isolating,” Farren said. “I recorded it mostly on my own. I had people play on it, but I mixed it myself, and I played a lot of the instruments myself, so there was a great amount of time where I was just alone. … It feels like it means more to me than anything I’ve put out because I put so much of myself into it.” With such an effervescent personality, it’s not a surprise Farren puts so much of himself into his work and live performances. That’s another reason he likes to share prolifically with fans on social media. “I think it’s important to be reasonably accessible and transparent in some ways and honest,” Farren said. “The people that I connect with, the people that I’m fans of — I’ve come to realize that they’re just normal people, so it’s kind of important for me to put out there in general when I feel insecure and stuff.” That honestly comes out in all aspects, even when he told a tale about his time spent staying at Scottoline’s home. “He’s got two guinea pigs that I’m allergic to, and he forces me to stay at his house in the same room as his guinea pigs. … He rubs them all over me, so I’m not allergic anymore,” Farren said. The relaxed atmosphere of the evening was highlighted by Eskimeaux’s performance. The close-knit setting found the band in a comfortable mindset, laughing and engaging with the audience, even testing out new songs, jokingly referring to it as time for them to practice. Eskimeaux’s set mainly pulled songs from its 2015

full-length “O.K.,” with the likes of “The Thunder Answered Back” and “I Admit I’m Scared.” As the songwriting and production project of Gabrielle Smith, particular lyrics throughout the set were enthralling as clever one liners exuded emotion. On “Broken Necks” Smith passionately delivered the line, “While you were breaking your neck trying to keep your head up/ I was breaking my neck just to stick it out for you.”

Eskimeaux make a point to be prolific on social media, but in a different way than the evening’s other bands. Passionate about political and social discourse, the band spreads information and resources, and fundraise for organizations such as the ACLU by donating its music’s proceeds. Whether by activism or dancing with the crowd, the bands made themselves at home at the College, if only for one night.

Smith passionately sings her clever and personal lyrics.

Kimberly Ilkowski / Staff Writer

page 16 The Signal March 29, 2017

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March 29, 2017 The Signal page 17

Horror of ‘Get Out’ is rooted in race

This week, WTSR Assistant Music Director Nelson Kelly highlights some of the best new albums that the College’s own radio station, 91.3 FM WTSR, puts into its weekly rotation.

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Left: Chris is forced to confront the ethical values of others. Right: Chris’s values begin to drift from his girlfriend’s. By Eric Preiser Staff Writer

Directed and written by Jordan Peele of “Key & Peele” fame, “Get Out” addresses socially relevant issues and creates unsettling and uncomfortable moments, which contribute to its eccentric horror theme. The opening scene sets the tone for the film, as a car follows a black man walking through a middle-class suburban neighborhood at night. This scene, though it starts off humorous, gets more intense as each moment passes. It is the first instance of social injustice and racism, and foreshadows the gravity of the film, which carries a deep message under its seemingly innocuous themes. We are later introduced to Chris (Daniel Kaluuya) and his

girlfriend, Rose (Allison Williams), when she asks him to visit her family. Chris is initially hesitant because Rose had not told her family that he is black. In a vivid and telling scene, Rose is driving Chris to meet her family when she hits a deer with her car. It is evident that Chris is deeply affected by this as he looks into the dying deer’s eyes. We can feel his pain through the screen and later learn that his mother died in a car accident when he was a kid, however, Rose does not bat an eyelash or show any remorse for killing the deer, even if by accident. Similarly, after recounting the incident to Rose’s father, his response is that more deer should die. Rose and her father’s unsympathetic reactions, although subtle, foreshadow

their true characters, which are revealed later in the film. Their lack of empathy also could symbolize the lack of acknowledgement to social injustice and the harm it causes in society. At first, Rose’s parents seem friendly and glad to meet Chris. Rose’s dad even feels the need to express that he voted for Obama to show how “not racist” he is, which adds to the discomfort of the atmosphere. The later turn of events shed light on the reality that even outwardly harmless people can be unsympathetic to social issues. Throughout the film, Chris, who is a photographer, escapes the discomfort of being around Rose’s family by capturing photographs with his camera and phone. The camera carries symbolism, as cameras and cell phones have been used to capture

and shed light on social justice issue in society. One of the most sinister characters is Jim Hudson, a blind art collector. Although he says he is not racist, Jim is still eager to use the opportunity of the others’ harmful intentions toward Chris to his own advantage. This aspect of the film sheds light on the effects of being “color blind,” without acknowledging or acting out against social injustice –– not being prejudiced does little to prevent social injustice from occurring. “Get Out” is an extremely well-executed horror movie that evokes suspense and shock while it brings to attention the problems of social injustice and racism. The plot becomes increasingly unsettling and captivating, which was ingeniously written and performed.

‘The Belko Experiment’ tests moral limits By Maximillian C. Burgos Sports Assistant Despite poor critical reviews and a notso-spectacular Rotten Tomatoes score, “The Belko Experiment” was not a bad movie. The movie does not hold back the gore nor does it spare the viewer’s emotions — it is not for the faint of heart. Set in Bogota, Columbia, the film follows

80 American workers who find themselves trapped in a corporate high-rise office. They are ordered to kill each other by an unknown voice through an intercom system. The employees were warned about the consequences of not complying with orders, which are explosively gory to say the least. Though this movie does not have any Alist actors, there are some recognizable faces within the movie. The acting in this movie

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The employees of Belko Industries are trapped at work by unknown men.

is better than most thriller movies, relying on the actors’ talents to drive emotional moments and bring home the comical ones. The movie’s plot is reminiscent of the Japanese film “Battle Royale” with its kill or be killed attitude. Both movies make it very clear from the beginning that next to no one will be spared and that, for the most part, things will be a bloodbath. There are some very stark differences, but in both movies the survivor is obvious in an ironic manner. “The Belko Experiment” does bring up some compelling questions of human nature during its hour-and-a-half run time. There are questions of morality, sanity and groupthink, but those questions are sidelined each time a character dies onscreen in a cringeinducing manner. The movie is gripping at some points, but hilarious in others. The film mixes unexpected twists with a few disappointing turns. That being said, “The Belko Experiment” will really test your ability to watch a gory thriller movie with a cheap excuse for a love story thrown into it. The thriller and action aspects of the movie are good. The love story is not even worth mentioning since it was dry and the characters spent most of the time angry with each other due to moral disputes. The love story was intended to humanize characters, but it turned into an annoying part of the movie. The movie was good overall, but not worth spending the money for theater tickets and concessions. It would be best to wait until the movie hits Netflix to watch it from the safety of your bed or couch, as some of the gory details are cringeworthy.

Name: Ty Richards Album Name: “Zillion” Release Number: 1st Hailing From: Austin, Texas Genre: “Psychedelic Dance Rock” Label: Tremolo Records Ty Richards, born in Austin, Texas, quit his ad agency job to write psychedelic garage rock. “Zillion” is his first complete solo project. His fans call him “Beck Zeppelin,” Beck being his biggest and most obvious influence on the record. The album consists of steady drum grooves, thumping bass lines, sharp lead guitars and synths that pierce through the mix. While Ty toys with strange, futuristic effects and synths, most of the songs are basic feel good garage rock. The opening track, “Spaceman,” is a great track full of catchy melodies and a solid groove. It sounds like something from the ’70s. Unfortunately, none of the other songs are nearly as good. Must Hear: “Spaceman” and “Going Out for a Cigarette”

Band Name: The Feelies Album Name: “In Between” Release Number: 6th Hailing From: Haledon, N.J. Genre: Jangly Post Punk Pop Label: Bar/None The Feelies are an old-school jangly rock band from the 1980s that came back in 2011 with the lackluster “Here Before.” 2017’s “In Between” shows the band in a much more honest, heartfelt light. Chorus-ed out acoustic guitars with a nice twangy bass and Violent Femmes-esque brush drumming showcase the twangy rock that the Feelies are most known for, though, more laid back and mature songwriting shows what they are capable of in the future. The Feelies are no longer a band trying to recapture what they once were, but one that embraces the past while focusing on the future. Must Hear: “Turn Back Time.” “Stay the Course,” “Been Replaced” and “Gone Gone Gone”

page 18 The Signal March 29, 2017

Morehshin Allahyari, Artist, Activist, Educator, and Occasional Curator Fridays, 12:30 - 1:30 PM Lunches welcome www.tcnj.edu/bbs Mayo Concert Hall Music Building TCNJ Campus

What does it mean to be the recipient of the "Leading Global Thinkers of 2016" award by Foreign Policy magazine? Morehshin Allahyari won the award "For saving heritage on a Zip drive." Join us!.

Program Dates: July 2 - August 3, 2017 Program Co-Directors: Dr. Deborah Compte and Dr. Agustin Otero Courses: ● SPA 103 – Beginning Spanish III (NB: SPA 103 completes language requirement) – taught by Dr. Otero ● SPA 171 – “Cultural Sites and Explorations: Madrid and Beyond” (mandatory 0.5 unit) ● SPA 203 – Intermediate Oral Proficiency (1 unit) – taught by Dr. Compte* ● SPA 216 – Current Events (1 unit) – taught by Dr. Compte* ● SPA 370 – ​Spain is Different​: Exploring National Identity through Spanish Festivals (1 unit) – taught by Dr. Otero* *Count toward a Spanish minor or major

The program cost includes course tuition, lodging, meals, and guided excursions within and outside of Madrid. For more information, see the Center for Global Engagement website or contact: Dr. Compte at ​dcompte@tcnj.edu​ or Dr. Otero at ​otero@tcnj.edu

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 19

Features

Student finds purpose through blacksmithing

Lapidow discovers a passion for blacksmithing.

By George Tatoris News Editor

Everything happens for a reason. That’s what Daniel Lapidow, a senior career and community studies major, believes. Because of his belief in Hashgacha Pratis, or “divine providence” in Hebrew, Lapidow said his life has unfolded not because of chance or coincidence, but due to God’s will. “Everything is wrapped together in one and everything is together in a way,” he said. In a short span of time, Lapidow discovered two things that would come to define his life — his disability and his passion for blacksmithing. As a child, Lapidow visited the Howell Living History Farm in Lambertville, N.J., for a lesson in cider-making. He was quickly drawn to the blacksmith demonstration. As he watched sparks fly, he knew he found his calling. Soon after this discovery, he was diagnosed with dyslexia. Still, through his passion for blacksmithing, Lapidow learned that he could express himself creatively in ways the written word could not. “I was able to go and practice once every

George Tatoris / News Editor

weekend (at the farm) and focus on things that I could create with my mind instead of just having to read and write,” he said. “It started off as therapy and having fun with fire every now and then.” At age nine, Lapidow became a member of the New Jersey Blacksmith Association. By age 12, he was apprenticed by Alex “Sasha” Parbuchenko, the master blacksmith at the Blacksmith of Trenton in Trenton, N.J. He continues to work there as an assistant between his career and community studies classes. The College’s CCS program teaches students with intellectual handicaps independence. While students receive a certificate rather than a degree, Lapidow believes his time at the College will be beneficial. “Sadly, the state, even though we take real college classes, doesn’t see (CCS) as a real organization — as real college life — so we don’t get a degree, but that’s no problem for me because I just want the knowledge,” Lapidow said. Lapidow hopes the knowledge he gains from business and art courses will bolster his career as a blacksmith. Students similar to Lapidow are required to take CCS-specific courses to

build independence during their freshman year, followed by regular courses with the help of a peer mentor. Maureen Hudson, a senior elementary and urban education double major, mentored Lapidow twice over the course of his college career. “My role is to provide one-on-one support to build independence,” she said. “So, I meet the student where they are, I provide the support needed… and then I fade out.” Hudson was impressed with Lapidow’s diligence. “Lapidow has a sense of why he is here and what he wants to get out of his time at TCNJ,” she said. “He’s really always had a strong sense of self.” During his junior year, Lapidow joined two clubs: Chabad, an orthodox Jewish community, and Rebel Art Movement, an art club that aims to have a strong artistic presence on campus. Other members of RAM go to Lapidow for metalworking advice. He also made a ram statue for the club. “They call me the metal master of the club,” Lapidow said. Lapidow is also a founding member of Students for Disability Awareness. He participated in the club’s (dis)Ability Monologues in October 2015, where he spoke in-depth about his dyslexia and what he’d do if, miraculously, he woke up and could read normally. All the same, he would not change his life. “I can’t complain,” he said. “Once I learned to cope with it, it was just a really fun lifestyle.” Lapidow was not always so confident. While he could shape metal at age 9, he could not do the same with his future. At times, he struggled to get academic help. The state refused to acknowledge his disability, assuming that he was simply lazy, he said. After going through two private schools, he found the Newgrange School, a special education school in Hamilton, N.J. “The teachers in that school basically saved my life because they taught me how

to deal with (my dyslexia),” Lapidow said. “I was really depressed as a kid.” Alfredo Cunha, Lapidow’s social studies teacher at Newgrange, became more than just a mentor, he became a friend. Their relationship was kindled by an interest in role-playing games such as Dungeons and Dragons. During a free period, Cunha would host role-playing sessions with students. Within these circles, peers are more openminded, Cunha said, allowing Lapidow to think “outside the box.” If Lapidow was ever bullied for his ideas at Newgrange, Cunha listened to him. “I don’t think it was so much advice, but just being there understanding his point of view,” Cunha said. “Being open enough to not see him and his ideas as offbeat or weird, but just different ways of thinking.” At Newgrange, Lapidow was still able to work on his blacksmithing. Arleen Thompson, the art teacher at Newgrange, helped him get his apprenticeship in Trenton after seeing his work. Students were also encouraged to enter pieces into the Mercer County Teen Arts Festival. Lapidow’s entry — a dinner bell — won first place at a state-wide competition. He gifted the bell to Newgrange’s principal. “He doesn’t let (his disability) get in his way,” Cunha said. “He’s not just going to give up and say, ‘I can’t do this because I have this disability.’” Ever devout to both his religion and blacksmithing, his friends dubbed him “The Hebrew Hammer.” Lapidow started a backyard blacksmith shop under his new moniker. After graduating from high school, he didn’t want to return to school, however, his father convinced him otherwise. After looking at colleges as far as Vermont, Lapidow discovered the College right under his nose. Lapidow’s entire life — his house, Newgrange, the Trenton Blacksmith and the College — can be seen in a single 30-minute drive. To Lapidow, this is no coincidence — it’s divine providence.

Activism expo discusses social justice issues By Kayla Lafi Staff Writer

Feminism, race and sexual violence were just a few of the many social justice issues discussed in the Education Building as students were encouraged to approach different tables and explore presentations by its respective organizations. In an effort to bring the College community together, Residential Education and Housing hosted Activism Out Loud: A Social Justice Exposition on March 20. The event was the brainchild of four passionate students: junior business marketing major Baldween Casseus, senior public health and psychology double major Aditi Mahapatra, sophomore biology major Madhav Patel and junior interactive multimedia major Gabe Salazar. “We are four students who are really passionate about all intersecting issues of social justice,” Mahapatra said. “We all have our own passions within social justice, but we all care strongly about social justice as a whole.” The event took around a year to plan, but the students were happy with the event’s impact. “We felt there was a need for students to learn more about different social justice issues and interact with different groups both on and off campus,” Casseus said. “We wanted (the event) to bring everyone together.” The planners of the event made sure to include a range of topics and presentations. “We wanted to have a little bit of everything ranging from race, class, gender and economic status,” Casseus said. Members of Women In Learning and Leadership emphasized the importance of intersectional feminism, a concept

Kayla Lafi / Staff Photographer

Best Buddies fights for inclusion.

regarding the ways oppressive institutions are interconnected. “I am a white straight woman,” said Sam Franz, a member of WILL and sophomore communication studies and English double major. “My experiences with the world are different than those of a black, Asian or Latina woman.” Bailey Falco, a co-chair of WILL’s Internal Affairs Committee and a junior psychology major, presented and stressed that non-intersectional feminism does not take into account the system of oppression that impacts all women differently. “For example, white feminism is the focus of the (feminist) movement,” Falco said. “A common statistic is that women make 78 cents to a man’s dollar, but that’s really only true for white women. Black women make 64 cents to a man’s dollar and hispanic women only 56 cents.” Meanwhile, Abbi Ankar, president of Best Buddies and a

senior special education and psychology double major, represented the College’s Best Buddies program and emphasized the need for inclusion through language. “We are not only trying to end the use of the R-word, but we believe that all words matter,” Anker said. “We are all more alike than different, and the way that we address people really matters. That’s our big push today.” Additionally, local organizations including Planned Parenthood, Habitat for Humanity, Trenton Area Soup Kitchen and Womanspace were represented at the event. Womanspace seeks to prevent domestic and sexual abuse, as well as protect families and individuals that have been impacted by it. “You may see different types of domestic abuse, but it’s all the same and it can happen to anyone,” said Susan Adams, a volunteer and community outreach coordinator for Womanspace. “I have been with the agency for 29 years, and I have seen the difference we can make.” The College’s Anti-Violence Initiative also had two presentations on bystander intervention and sexual violence and consent. AVI educates the College community about issues like sexual assault, domestic violence and stalking. “We are talking about this because in a rape culture, social messages such as those seen in pop culture normalize instances of power-based personal violence and place a lot of the blame on victims,” said Matt Hardy, a Student Anti-Violence Education peer educator for AVI and senior woman, gender and sexuality studies and sociology double major. see JUSTICE on page 21

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March 29, 2017 The Signal page 21

Justice / Students learn about social justice continued from page 19

Along with rape and sexual assault, the topic of immigration has been a crucial topic at the College. Thelma Carrera, a junior philosophy and Spanish double major, and Genesis Rubio, a junior psychology major, dispelled the myths of immigration during their presentation. One myth was the generalization that all undocumented immigrants are criminals. “If you are an undocumented immigrant the last thing you want to do is bring attention to yourself,” Carrera said.

In addition, the Muslim Student Association discussed Islamophobia. “(This conversation) is really important because of President Trump and the media,” said Kanza Tahir, a junior biology major. “Even though we feel that TCNJ is very liberal, there might be some unconscious bias about Islam, which is why it is so important to have this conversation and answer people’s questions. It’s better that they hear it from a Muslim than a person who doesn’t know the facts.” Farsha Rizwan, a senior biology major, also believes it is essential that students are aware

that the College is not safe from prejudice. “I think, sometimes, it seems like TCNJ’s in a bubble,” Rizwan said. “(Students) know what is happening in the political climate, but they don’t really know that it is actually happening to Muslim students at the College.” Decontee Davis, a senior sociology major, gave a presentation on the ideology of colorblind racism and why it’s detrimental to diversity. “(The ideology) ignores race, and when you ignore race, you ignore the different experiences of minorities,” Davis said. The forum served as an open door that

encouraged students and community members to discuss important and interconnected social justice issues. “It is impossible to talk about activist issues without considering how they are all interconnected,” Rubio said. The event brought together activists leading the movement for local, national and global change, and it created a safe space for students to learn about these issues. “Now that we created this event, we hope that it will become a legacy event and each year, hopefully, it will become a little bit better,” Casseus said.

Undocumented immigrant becomes activist By Elise Schoening Staff Writer Most of the seats in the Business Building Lounge were already filled on Tuesday, March 21, when a Rutgers-New Brunswick Law School student stepped to the front of the room to share her story. Marisol Conde-Hernandez has made quite the name for herself. While in college, Conde-Hernandez founded the first undocumented, youth-led immigrant rights activism group in New Jersey. This May, she will become the first undocumented immigrant to graduate from a New Jersey law school. The rising immigration activist shared her wisdom, as well as words of advice with students as part of the College’s series “Activism 101 and 102.” In her keynote address, CondeHernandez opened up about her past and the personal struggles that came with growing up as an undocumented immigrant in a mixed-status family. “I use my family as an example of the reality of immigrant families, in that it’s not composed of all undocumented people or citizens,” Conde-Hernandez said. “This is what a mixed-status family looks like. This is what an immigrant family looks like.” From a young age, CondeHernandez understood that her

family was different from that of her peers. At 10 years old, she was urged to apply for a scholarship program at a better school, but her illegal status made the seemingly simple task of filling out the application impossible. “When I looked at the application — and I was always the one to fill out all the applications because I’m the one who spoke English — I noticed that it asked for a Social Security number, and I just turned the paper away,” Conde-Hernandez said. She described a childhood tainted with the knowledge that she did not have a Social Security number and would, therefore, limit her opportunities in life. However, the DREAM Act, a legislative bill introduced in 2001, aimed to create a path for CondeHernandez and other undocumented immigrants to obtain a green card and pursue higher education in the United States. Conde-Hernandez still remembers the pivotal moment of hearing about the bill. “I was sitting at home watching the news in eighth grade when I heard about the DREAM Act,” Conde-Hernandez said. “I think that’s really what started shaping my mind as an advocate. I learned that it’s beyond me. There’s other people like me because if there weren’t, these legislatures

The Culinary Club Presents...

Lions Plate

Kim Iannarone / Staff Photographer

Conde-Hernandez describes the struggle of living without a Social Security number. wouldn’t have drafted a bill to help them.” Efforts to ratify the DREAM Act have repeatedly failed to pass through Congress. Nevertheless, the notion that undocumented immigrants deserve equal rights and opportunities has stuck with Conde-Hernandez and propelled her toward a life of activism. “I didn’t intend to be an advocate for immigrant population,” Conde-Hernandez said. “It just turned out to be that way. I saw a need and tried to fill that need.” Conde-Hernandez urged students of the College to find their voice and rally behind issues of interest. She conceded that turning activism into an actual career isn’t easy. Most people don’t get paid

for the activism they do, but this doesn’t dilute the importance or necessity of such work, according to Conde-Hernandez. “If we all spoke up the way that I’ve spoken up, we would actually have (legislatures) and executives who listened and were held responsible by constitutes and citizens,” Conde-Hernandez said. “They have been in control of the government for decades because we have been passive. We can’t be passive.” Conde-Hernandez challenged the students seated before her to internalize her message and create change in their own communities. “You don’t have to have a college education to have a gut feeling about the world and to learn about the world,” Conde-Hernandez said.

: Microwave french toast

By Emily Laskey Columnist

French toast is a delicious breakfast.

Flickr

“But because you all are in college, how are you going to take advantage of the wealth of information you have available to you to further the causes that you care about?” Senior international studies and Arabic double major Alessandra Testa left the event inspired. Conde-Hernandez’s words resonated and pushed her to reevaluate her own actions. “I think it’s so easy to get trapped in the TCNJ bubble, view current events in a detached way and disassociate with the ‘real world,’” Testa said. “This was a good lecture to have on campus. It forced me to think about how I can use my education to make practical, effective change happen.”

Did you wake up with a sweet tooth this morning? Are you looking for a quick, satisfying breakfast that’s as decadent as it is health-conscious? You’re in luck. You can follow this easy recipe to make cinnamon maple french toast in the comfort of your dorm room, using only a mug and a few simple ingredients. This low-calorie (less than 150 calories) sweet craving can be cooked up within five minutes. Plus, you can find most of these ingredients at the C-store or the local grocery store. This dessert-breakfast is the perfect way to start your morning before a class or an exam. Considering breakfast is the most important meal of the day, it is important to make sure to enjoy your meal. You can whip up this treat in a cup or bowl in your microwave and take it to-go, or spice it up by adding some powdered sugar or berries. No matter how you shake up this classic recipe, you can’t go wrong with a sweet breakfast that’s made for the busy college student. Bring the taste of the diner or the local IHOP to your dorm room this season with this cinnamon-maple take on a classic breakfast treat.

Ingredients: ¼ cup egg whites, about two eggs 2 tablespoons of unsweetened vanilla almond milk 1 no-calorie sweetener packet ¾ teaspoon of maple extract ½ teaspoon of cinnamon 2 bread slices 2 tablespoons of lite pancake syrup Optional: 1 tablespoon of powdered sugar Berries Instructions: 1. Whisk eggs, milk, sweetener, maple extract and cinnamon in a microwave-safe cup or bowl. 2. Cut each bread slice into four squares and add pieces in the cup or bowl. Stir gently with a fork to coat all bread pieces in the liquid mixture. 3. Cover with microwave-safe covering and microwave for one minute. 4. Remove from microwave and gently stir with fork. Remove microwave-safe covering. 5. Microwave again for 45 seconds. 6. Let sit in microwave for one minute. 7. Pour pancake syrup on top. 8. Enjoy!

page 22 The Signal March 29, 2017

: Nov. ‘05

Campus Style

The Singal spreads fake news

Alyssa Gautieri / Features Editor

Gitenstein engages in ‘sultry sex,’ according to The Singal.

Every week, Features Editor Alyssa Gautieri hits the archives and finds old Signals that relate to current College topics and top stories. Every April, The Signal staff creates an April Fool’s edition of the campus newspaper called “The Singal”. Using light humor, the annual tradition is intended to create laughs throughout the College’s community. In 2006, the staff decided to feature College President R. Barbara Gitenstein on the front page of The Singal, claiming that she engaged in “hot steamy sex” with Roscoe the Lion. This week, The Singal features a range of comedic stories from The Geese Monologues to the renaming of Paul Loser Hall. There is no reason to ask Kayy about your sexual problems ever again. The remedy is right on campus, and even the Git will tell you it never fails. The Singal has uncovered super secret documents revealing that the steam from vents throughout campus significantly improve sexual performance. Suspicions were raised when a student reported seeing the Git “getting intimate” with Roscoe, the College’s mascot, over the vent near the student center. The Git initially denied the allegations. But after multiple sightings, The Singal decided to launch its own investigation. After repeated phone calls to the College administration, school officials finally released a health report confirming sexual side effects of inhaling the steam. Health officials cited increased sexual drive, stamina and pleasure after prolonged exposure.

Coincidentally, the report was dated Oct. 29, 2005, the day of the closing ceremonies for the College’s sesquicentennial. “I knew the Git was extra giddy while giving her speech that day,” Jenny Goodblow, junior psychology major, said. “Now it all makes sense.” Once the rumor of the steam’s effects spread, students and faculty eager to rejuvenate their sex lives flocked to the steam vents all over campus. “My girlfriend always used to tell me that she wasn’t in the mood,” Ben Dover, sophomore physical education major, said. “Not anymore.” So what causes this amazing steam phenomenon? Sources tell The Singal that the primary ingredients can only be found at the College, including the pungent-smelling manure that the College uses every spring and the mold from the water-damaged apartment complex. These chemicals seep down through the soil into the steam pipes and create the magical chemical reaction. The College’s new resource has given a whole new meaning to its self-proclaimed reputation as the HOT college. Twenty thousand new freshman applications swarmed into the office of Admissions after the word of the steam vents hit the streets. With the surge of applications, it is estimated that the College will have the lowest acceptance rate of any college or university in the world.

Photo courtesy of Target

Target uses unedited models in a new swimsuit campaign. By Jillian Greene Columnist With summer approaching faster than us busy students realize, it may be time to add a new swimsuit to your collection. I see swimsuits advertised all over social media, and they always catch my eye. When I click on the brand’s websites, however, I see prices as high as $90 for bikini bottoms — not even a top and bottom set. Since one-piece swimsuits have made a huge comeback, I’ve seen a simple black one-piece priced at $75. Initially, I was shocked by these prices. While I’ve become used to these high prices, I still won’t budge — no matter how

cute the suit. One store I’ve always admired for its swim section is Target. Target suits are very fashionable and affordable, ranging from about $15 to $50. In its most recent swim campaign, Target featured unphotoshopped and unedited models to portray “real women” in today’s media. Society is used to seeing women who are a size 0-2 in fashion advertisements, but since Target — and many other brands — have begun to incorporate models of all different shapes and sizes, these brands have become more appealing to a wider audience. If you’re searching for a cute and affordable suit for summer 2017, check out Target. You won’t be disappointed.

Celebritease : Childhood staples have anniversary

Osment and Earles meet on a hike. By Mackenzie Cutruzzula Columnist

Now that we’re past the semester’s halfway point, you might be thinking to yourself “Where does the time go?” To make you feel even older, this week marks the anniversary of many college students’ childhood pop culture staples. The YouTube classic “Potter Puppet Pals: The Mysterious Ticking Noise” turned 10 years old on Thursday, March 23. The famous video — made during what I

Twitter

consider the heyday of YouTube — features Harry Potter-themed puppets crazily popping in and out of the scene repeating their character’s name. Years later we may all be wondering why this was so funny, but I challenge you to show it to any middle schooler to gauge the humor. On Friday, March 24, the “Hannah Montana” series celebrated 11 years since its premiere on Disney Channel. Fashion vests and layered tank tops may be a

thing of the past, but the show itself remains a cultural icon. The show helped launch the careers of guest stars like Selena Gomez and Corbin Bleu, who went on to star in other Disney Channel originals. And, of course, no middle school iPod would have been complete without Hannah Montana hits like “If We Were A Movie” and “Nobody’s Perfect.” Co-stars of the show, Emily Osment and Jason Earles recently gave the Twittersphere a mini “Hannah Montana” reunion. Osment posted a picture of Earles, letting fans know that she ran into him on a hike. Twitter exploded instantly and users were calling for a real reunion. However, Miley Cyrus, who played the main character, has previously revealed it wasn’t always the best of both worlds growing up in the limelight. In 2015, she opened up to Marie Claire about anxiety and body image issues caused by her television role. Cyrus has since liberated herself from her Disney past, so it is unlikely we will see a reunion in the future.

Kevin Jonas, on the other hand, proved he was still proud of his Disney roots. On Friday, March 24, the eldest Jonas posted a video to Instagram of his daughter rocking out in front of the television. She was dancing to Demi Lovato singing in “Camp Rock 2: The Final Jam.” “This is weird…” he wrote in the caption. Jonas’s younger brother Joe recently mentioned that another “Camp Rock” may be possible.

“If it made sense, sure,” he told Marie Claire. “It would be funny to do a spin on it. Do the graduating days, make it kinda dark. ... We’ve joked around about the idea a couple times.” Lovato herself confirmed to Entertainment Tonight that she came up with the idea to have another sequel, and that it will actually be happening. We can only hope that Kevin Jonas’s adorable daughters will be in on the casting.

Lovato confirms ‘Camp Rock’ reunion.

Flickr

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 23

Fun Stuff

page 24 The Signal March 29, 2017

Fun StufF Spring Fever Matching

Draw a line between the statement and the picture it corresponds with.

When the end of the semester nears, and everyone stops paying attention in class.

When your roommate takes their shoes off after a hot day.

When it’s too nice outside to go to class.

When you realize Rita’s Italian Ice is now open for business.

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 25

Fun Stuff

WORD BANK

page 26 The Signal March 29, 2017

Sports

Track and field transitions to spring season Track and Field

By Nicole DeStefano Staff Writer

The men’s and women’s track and field teams started off on the right foot on Saturday, March 25, at their spring season opener, the Golden Rams Invitational at West Chester University. The men put forth solid performances in the sprint events. Sophomores Thomas Livecchi and Nathan Osterhus dominated the 400-meter dash. Livecchi won the race with a top performance, clocking in at 50.10. Osterhus followed in fourth with a time of 50.62. “After running the 400-meter this Saturday, I was very happy with my performance,” Livecchi said. “The team as a whole performed very well. Honestly, I can’t ask for much of a better start to the season because with track you have your ups and downs. “But no matter what, you have to keep trying and you have to keep your head held high,” Livecchi added. “Overall, I think that my performance was great for the season opener, but there is always room to improve as the season progresses.” Senior Jake Lindacher, who recently attended the NCAA Division III Championships, made his spring season debut in the 110meter hurdles. Lindacher clocked

in with a time 15.14 and took fifth place in the 100-meter dash with a time of 11.13. The men’s 4x400 meter relay team took third place out of 12 teams. Livecchi, Osterhus, freshman Andrew Nee and senior Zakaria Rochdi each contributed strong performances to finish with a time of 3:22.49. Two Lions highlighted the 800-meter dash. Senior Brandon Mazzarella and sophomore Daniel Brennan came in third and fifth place, respectively. Mazzarella crossed the finish line in 1:57.90 and Brennan in 1:58.34. “My performance in the 800meter was a good solid effort,” Mazzarella said. “Coming into the meet, the plan was to get a good workout in and some speed work. The race did just that, so when it comes time to run the 1500-meter next week, I’ll be more prepared to go out fast because it still won’t be as fast as an 800-meter.” Sophomore Brian Mitchell secured first place out of a field of 14 competitors in the 5000-meter run. He clocked in at 15:56.50. Senior Chris Guglielmo cleared a height of 4.45 meters and secured first place for the Lions. The Lady Lions stood out in the sprint events. Freshmen Samantha Gorman and Katie LaCapria secured second and fourth place with times of 58.16 and 58.97 in the 400-meter dash,

respectively. Gorman returned to the track with a 26.15 finish in the 200-meter dash. The 400-meter hurdles were highlighted by both junior Jenna Ellenbacher and freshman Nicole Tampone. Ellenbacher placed third with a time of 1:06.35 and Tampone in fourth with a time of 1:07.41. “It was my first time being able to compete the 400-meter hurdles in college due to injuries previous seasons, and I was happy to run my fastest season opener in the event yet,” Ellenbacher said. “My main goal is to start dropping time to a new (personal record) for the race as I get back into the rhythm of competing the hurdles.” Two sophomores stepped up in the distance events. Emma Bean clocked in six seconds faster than her competition with a time of 18:58.98 in the 5000-meter run. Abigail Faith took second in the 1500-meter run, clocking in at 5:05.02. The women’s 4x100 meter relay made its season debut with a second place finish. The team, composed of junior Danielle Celestin, freshman Allison Zelinski, junior Meagan McGourty and Gorman, sprinted to a 50.10 finish. Tampone, Gorman, sophomore Alesia Passaro and LaCapria took third in the 4x400 meter relay with a time of 4:05.61.

Photo courtesy of Sports Information Desk

Livecchi wins the 400-meter dash. “Being that it was the first meet of the season, I think our 4x100 relay team performed really well,” Celestin said. “I love that we are showing strong chemistry already, especially since there are new relay team members that haven’t worked together before.” The Lady Lions also shined in the field events. In the pole vault, senior Tracy Prentice cleared a height of 3.25 meters. Freshman Christine Woods and McGourty tied for fifth with 1.48 meter jump in the high jump. Freshman Angela Rambert placed seventh in discus with a throw of 30.55 meters. She ranked eighth in shot put

with a 10.61-meter throw. “Yesterday was very encouraging for the team as a whole,” Mazzarella said. “There were a ton of good performances, and our team is beginning to get more well rounded and we are starting to have some depth. I am especially proud of the freshmen for adjusting to the program so well and some of them are already running faster than they did in high school.” The Lions will travel to Williamsburg, Va., on Friday, March 31, and Saturday, April 1, for the Colonial Relays at William and Mary College.

Cheap Seats

International competition makes baseball fun again By Michael Battista Staff Writer After a grueling two-week tournament that spanned the globe in both venues and competing teams, the United States stood tall as baseball’s World Champions on Wednesday, March 22, after defeating Puerto Rico, 8-0, in the World Baseball Classic final. I’m not going to lie and say I watched every game of the event, though, I did wake up at 5 a.m. a few times to watch teams like Australia, Israel and the Netherlands during the group stages. This tournament was a mix of god awful games, nail biters and great stories. A team like China, which has competed in every World Baseball Classic since the tournament’s start, earned only a single run during its time and gave up 24 runs all together.

AP Photo

Stroman leads Team USA to a 8-0 shutout against Puerto Rico.

Then teams like Chinese Taipei lost all three of its games, but it wasn’t because of the bats. The team scored 20 runs over three games in high scoring battles. Ultimately, the team’s pitching was its entire downfall. It may have been bad baseball in a traditionalist view of the game, but it was fun to watch those early group stage battles. Team USA pitcher Danny Duffy told USA Today that seeing every different matchup and playing type was the best part of watching the tournament after his team won. “That’s what made this tournament so fun, watching everyone having their different style,” Duffy said. Going back to Team USA — it’s about time that it stood at the top of the mountain. In an article for The Signal, I talked about how American professional sports teams call themselves “World Champions” even though it seems undeserved. I mentioned how U.S. baseball teams especially can’t hold that title, but it’s nice to finally say the title has been earned. For the past three tournaments in 2006, 2009 and 2013, Team USA could only muster a fourth-place finish. Team USA and MLB didn’t care about the tournament at all, even when all-time greats like Derek Jeter and Ken Griffey Jr. took part. Nothing Team USA did seemed to matter over the might of nations like Japan, South Korea or the Dominican Republic. Team USA didn’t win with an all-star lineup, much like the legendary 1980 United States men’s national ice hockey team. It won with young talent who had fun being there. When Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim center fielder and New Jersey-native Mike Trout turned down an offer to play for the team, some fans seemed worried that other big time players would follow suit. Why should they waste time with an international tournament that takes away from spring training and wouldn’t be broadcasted on prime time television? The tournament was only available on MLB Network and ESPN Deportes. But the players in the tournament — which did include a fair amount of major league talent such as San Francisco Giants catcher Buster Posey and Baltimore

Orioles centerfielder Adam Jones — came together more than I’ve seen some major league teams do. They topped teams like Japan, the Dominican Republic and Puerto Rico where their international talent has been on display in MLB and baseball is massively popular. They may have secured the best record after the tournament ended, but they won when it mattered. Team USA was able to silence Japan and Puerto Rico in the Championship round with solid pitching and clutch hitting. But I don’t think this is just about talent. Major League Baseball has been lacking in the fun category in the past few years. Players are told to not flip bats, admire home runs and overly celebrate after making a great play in the outfield. Excessive celebration wasn’t a problem in the World Baseball Classic and made games more fun to watch. During the Championship, pitcher Marcus Stroman had a no-hitter going into the seventh inning against Puerto Rico. Ultimately, his 73 pitch performance earned him the Most Valuable Player award. During the game, after he retired the Puerto Rican side and headed back to his dugout, cameras caught him doing a little shimmy dance. It’s this sort of dumb, fun move that makes me like players. “Sometimes you’ve just got to be yourself out there, you know,” Stroman said in an interview with MLB Network after the win. That’s the sort of mentality major league baseball needs if it wants to bring people back into the game. Instead of following unwritten rules that say how players need to act during situations, just let them be themselves and celebrate if they want, especially without the fear of being hit by a 90 mph fastball during their next at-bat as retaliation. I truly hope that we can see Team USA put on another great display in four years. Sure, I hope it wins with a more exciting and nail-biting title game. Almost in a World Cup-like fashion, I hope fans go into the 2021 tournament with excitement after hearing about this one. Maybe interest in the sport and tournament will increase in this country, as a result.

March 29, 2017 The Signal page 27 Softball

Softball splits doubleheader with Red Dragons By Maximillian C. Burgos Sports Assistant The Lions softball team split a doubleheader with the State University of New York-Cortland Red Dragons. The first game was closely contested until the Red Dragons scored in the eighth inning to win the game, 2-1. The second game was more one-sided with the Lions winning, 5-1. In the first game, junior pitcher Sam Platt took a tough loss at the hands of the Red Dragons. The loss put Platt’s season record at 3–3. She pitched a solid game, ultimately surrendering two runs on eight hits, but striking out five batters. The Red Dragons got out to an early league by scoring in the second inning. They led the game until fifth inning when freshman infielder/outfielder Annalise Suitovsky tied the score with a booming home run that cleared the middle field fences. The homer was Suitovsky’s first as a Lion. Platt worked her way out of a tough jam in the sixth with runners in scoring position. She induced two infield pop-ups and struck out another batter to end the threat. In a bout of tough luck, the Red Dragons got the go-ahead run in the eighth, giving them the victory. “Before each game, the team studies the stats of the other

Levine smashes a home run.

team, and we make sure to pay close attention to what the pitchers are like,” said Jess Santelli, sophomore infielder/outfielder. “Something Coach (Sally) Miller is good at is providing us and preparing us with information about what kind of pitching we are likely to see from each

Photo courtesy of Sports Information Desk

pitcher, and we capitalize on that during the practices leading up to the game.” The Lions came out hungry for a victory in game two. Freshmen pitcher Kristen Barrera, sophomore pitcher Sara Bielamowicz and Platt worked together to put the lid on the Red

Dragons offense in the second. The Lions scored three runs in the third inning and established a commanding lead. An RBI single by sophomore infielder/catcher Jess McGuire put the Lions on the board followed by a fielder’s choice by Santelli, putting the Lions out ahead, 3-0.

Lacrosse

In the fifth, McGuire hit another RBI-single to put the Lions out to a 4-0 lead. The Lions gave up a run in the sixth, but got it back when junior outfielder Madison Levine blasted a homer over the center field fence. Platt returned in the seventh to secure the win and earned her first save for the season. In the end, Levine, McGuire and Santelli all had three hits on the day. Levine and Suitovsky both hit home runs. Bielamowicz earned the win for the second game, but Platt earned the save. The Lions next game is a doubleheader on Wednesday, March 29, at Cabrini College. The team later returns to Dr. June Walker Field on Saturday, April 1, for a conference doubleheader against Rutgers University-Newark starting at 1 p.m. “There’s definitely a difference playing a non-conference versus a conference team,” Santelli said. “While our approach going into each game remains constant, it is easier to go into a game when you know more about the opposing team. “Since we know more about conference teams’ strengths and weaknesses, there is no excuse about not knowing what to expect when playing them,” Santelli added. “Out of conference teams are a little bit more challenging to prepare for since we don’t play them as frequently as we play conference teams.”

Baseball

Lacrosse smashes Bears Home / Pitching stays strong By Miguel Gonzalez Sports Editor

After being absent from the field during spring break, the Lions were back in action and beat Ursinus College, 15-3, on March 21. The Lions offense ignited and produced a whooping 31 shots at the Bears defense. Three Lions collected multiple goals as senior attacker Mia Blackman scored three, sophomore midfielder Kathleen Jaeger scored four and junior midfielder Amanda Muller scored five. The scoring barrage started in the third minute when freshman midfielder Allie Gorman scored off a rebound. Muller and Jaeger then scored back to back goals, giving the Lions a 3-0 lead.

At the eighth minute, the Bears netted in their lone goal of the first half when junior defender/midfielder Franny Liberatoscioli blasted a long distance shot. The Lions offense fury continued into the second half as the team netted in eight more goals. The pounding victory put the Lions at 4-0. The team is currently ranked third in the nation in women’s Division III lacrosse. “We still have a lot to practice and experience before we play against tough competition,” said Brooke Lionetti, sophomore defender. “Our team can’t never get rusty.” The team will go on the road to Gettysburg, Pa., for a game against Gettysburg College on Thursday, March 30.

Crowley secures a save for the Lions. continued from page 28

Photo courtesy of Sports Information Desk

Lionetti and the Lions defense concedes only three goals.

The guys want to win the conference, go to regionals and play better every game.” Having years of experience as the head coach of the team, Glus recognized that even with a 12-3 win, the players still have some room for improvement. “The other part I think we need to work on is the mentality,” Glus said. “Trusting yourself, trusting your teammates and just letting it happen. It’s a game. Have fun and just let it go.” If the team can continue to play as well as they did against Ursinus, the players will certainly begin to have more fun. Glus has an admirable connection to his players, and his dedication to them is demonstrated in their performance.

Photo courtesy of Sports Information Desk

“We don’t have any superstars, just a lot of good players,” Glus said. “If we keep playing this way across the board then we’ll be in good shape.” On Saturday, March 25, the Lions swept Franklin and Marshall College,10-5 and 9-1, in a doubleheader. The Diplomats couldn’t dispute with the Lions offense as they recorded a total of 25 hits and 19 runs. Meanwhile, the pitcher duo of sophomore Michael Fischer and Matt Curry carried out victories. The Lions will travel west to Pennsylvania for a pair of away of games. The team will compete against Haverford College on Thursday, March 30. The team’s next home game is a doubleheader on Saturday, April 1, against Rutgers UniversityNewark starting at 11:30 a.m.

Signal

Sports

Men’s tennis player achieves 100th career victory

Lady Lions debut spring season with three dominant wins By Miguel Gonzalez Sports Editor Entering into the Mercer County Park court on Saturday, March 25, senior Jack August had won 49 career singles and 49 career doubles. By end of the meet against the University of Rochester, August gained another singles and doubles victory, achieving 100 career wins. Teaming up with junior Chris D’Agostino, the duo defeated Yellow Jackets senior Sam Leeman and junior Andrew Nunno, 8-5. At the singles, August served another loss to Leeman and won in three sets. August’s first win came at the hands of then-Dickinson College sophomore Dixon Blue on Feb. 23, 2013. August never stopped winning from there. “August has always been a consistent player on the team, “ head coach Scott Dicheck said. “It takes a lot reach the 100-win club here. It’s like scoring 1000 points in basketball. Jack works hard everyday to win in the court. In addition to August’s 100th win, the men’s tennis team smashed the Yellow Jackets, 8-1. The following day, the Lions grabbed another team win against Hobart College at the Student

August grabs two wins against the Yellow Jackets. Recreation Center. August continued stacking his win column while D’Agostino battled in four sets to beat junior Harry Nichols. On March 21, the Lions snapped Kalamazoo College’s five-game winning streak. The team defeated the 18th nationally ranked Hornets,

5-4. While the Lions dominated the doubles competitions, they outlasted the Hornets in singles. With both teams tied at 4, D’Agostino secured the overall team victory against freshman Noah Karoub. On Wednesday, March 22, the

Photo courtesy of Sports Information Desk

women’s tennis made its spring season debut with a 7-2 home win against Chestnut Hill College. At the doubles competitions, the Lady Lions won two of the three matches. The junior duo of Maddy Stoner and Brittany Reedman were held back by Griffins

seniors Laure-Anne Josso and Louise Charley, 8-4. Afterwards, senior Katie Buchbinder obliterated Griffins sophomore Daniela Siqueira in 6-1 and 6-0 sets. “Our goal this season is to win the our conference for the 35th consecutive time,” Dicheck said. “We have the talent and determination to reach far into the NCAA tournament this year.” The women’s team then soundly defeated the University of Rochester, 8-1, on Saturday, March 25. In doubles, the Lions swept the Yellow Jackets in singles and surrendered one loss in doubles. The Lions capped off the week with their third victory against William Smith College, 6-3. After being swept by Herons in doubles, the Lions won every singles match. The men’s tennis team is scheduled to compete against New York University at home on Wednesday, March 29, at 3 p.m. The men’s and women’s tennis teams will travel on Saturday, April 1, to Fredericksburg, Va., for a meet against the University of Washington. “Even though we’ve been home for a while, I think the road trip will bond the teams,” Dicheck said. “We need our players to support each other wherever will go so we can beat anyone.”

Baseball outlasts growling Bears in home opener

Photo courtesy of Sports Information Desk

Zachary wins his first game against the Bears. By Caleigh Carlson Correspondent

The baseball team dominated in its home opener at George Ackerman Park, on Thursday, March 23, after returning from its annual trip to Winter Haven, Fla., where the Lions won six games

Lions Lineup March 29, 2017

I n s i d e

and lost three. The fans bared the cold, windy day to watch junior pitcher Brandon Zachary capture his first victory of the season. Zachary pitched six innings, striking out six and allowing only one run on four hits to the Ursinus College Bears. After four back-to-back innings in

Track and Field page 26

a scoreless pitchers’ duel, the Lions scored their first run in the fifth inning. The run was a product of heads-up baserunning, as freshman outfielder Thomas Persichetti scored it on a wild pitch. The bulk of the runs were scored in the sixth inning. It was an eventful one for the Lions in which the team scored a total of 11 runs. The inning included eight hits, three walks and three defensive errors on one play. The madness began when Persichetti drove a single to left field putting the Lions ahead, 2-1. Junior infielder Patrick Anderson had the next run-scoring single. Following Anderson’s single, both junior infielder Zachary Schindler and senior infielder Alex Christian walked with bases loaded, putting the team ahead, 5-1. Hitting a ground ball to short, with bases still loaded, senior catcher CJ Gearhart ended up on third base due to multiple defensive errors at home plate. The sun darted in and out of the clouds, mimicking the players as they ran in and out of the dugout between innings. But by the time the sun seemed to be gone for good in the sixth inning, the

Cheap Seats page 26

Lions stubbornly made a point to stay on offense. The explosive inning continued as 16 batters came to the plate. Anderson drove in two more runs with his second hit of the inning and Schindler singled an RBI through the right side, allowing Persichetti to score. “I thought their starter was really good,” Schindler said. “He had us guessing a lot of times on pitches, but we were able to get to their weaker guys and do what we did.” The final three innings saw a quick end. In the seventh, sophomore pitcher Dylan Crowley struck out one and held the score for the Lions. Following his lead, sophomore pitcher Zac deRocco was equally successful in the eighth. Finally, freshman Nickolas Kleftogiannis closed out the ninth, needing only three pitches to put a stamp on the home opening victory of the Lions. “It’s always nice winning that first home game,” head coach Dean Glus said. “The players have goals and their goals are to win a lot of ball games. see HOME page 27

Lacrosse page 27

When ever The Singal where ever

Parks & Rentertainment

Cubbalt debuts new ‘Shmologram’

I’ve been selling crack since like the fifth grade. By Phuck Mayor of Trenton

Rapper Bobby Shmurda performed his first-ever concert from prison last week as part of CUB Alt C-list rappers concert. With the help of cuttingedge technology, Shmurda was able to perform onstage in the Decker Social Space from the confines of his prison cell. Shmurda, along with opening acts B.o.B. and DMX, was determined to show the world how his music has evolved since his time away from the mainstream. Atlanta-based rapper B.o.B., best known for hit songs like the 2010 “Airplanes” took the stage first. Instead of rapping like the audience expected, the rapper unleashed a 15-minute tirade of unfounded conspiracy theories. “The Illuminati controls everything we see, yo,” he said.

“The media doesn’t want you to know that the Earth is really flat — it’s all an illusion.” In an interview with The Singal, B.o.B. said the absence of his musical release is due to his activism in raising awareness for issues that are, in his opinion, overlooked. “A lot of people are turned off by the phrase ‘flat Earth,’ but there’s no way you can see all the evidence and not figure it out. But no matter how high you go, you can’t see the curve of the Earth. People just gotta wake up,” he said. The rapper continued for longer than anticipated since the following act was running late. The audience was bewildered and confused about the rapper’s performance and general sanity. “I never knew that he had lost his mind in the time since he’s been on the radio,” said

Hubble Space Telescope

Steven Glansberg, a junior biology major. “But he ended it with ‘Strange Clouds,’ so that was pretty cool.” Following B.o.B. was DMX, who arrived holding a bottle of Olde English and his entourage by his side. “What’s good, NJIT?!” he yelled into the crowd before launching into a rowdy rendition of “Where the Hood At?” DMX’s set excited the crowd, but was stopped midway through a performance of “X Gon Give it to ya,” when Campus Police entered to investigate DMX and his crew after a complaint that they had eaten at Eickhoff Hall without paying an entry fee. According to police, the rapper pistol-whipped an employee who refused to allow them entry without a valid TCNJ ID. Police confiscated their belongings and recovered a burrito, 2 pounds of

lamb from Side Quimby’s and a gram of crack cocaine. The rapper was brought off the stage in handcuffs, as students set up the hologram machine to contact Shmurda. The machine was developed by the College’s interactive multimedia department and allows the user’s hologram to move along with in real-time. Shmurda was recently convicted of several criminal conspiracy charges and is currently serving a seven-year sentence in maximum security prison. “I ain’t did shit,” he said. “Now I gotta spend my time sittin’ on my ass watching these cracker-ass guards tryin’ to do the shmoney dance to fuck with me.” Although Shmurda was confined to his jail cell, his performance was equally as exciting. Many of Shmurda’s friends, who refer to themselves collectively as “GS9,” crowded into the cell to be a part of the show. “When they locked me up they got all my GS9 niggas too, so now we all in here together,”

Shmurda said. “We’re hoping if this hologram shit works out then maybe we can start building up some buzz online and drop a new mixtape.” The audience was impressed at the efficacy of using the hologram technology, which was dubbed the “Shmologram” iby the rapper and his posse. “I thought it was pretty crazy that they were all still waving guns around and smoking when they did ‘Hot Nigga,’” said Edward Durkin, a sophomore nursing major. “It was just like the music video. You would think they wouldn’t still have those things in prison, but it was lit.” Some students were excited that a different variety of musical acts were able to perform. “I’ve also been selling crack since like fifth grade, so I can really relate to what Bobby has to say,” said Geoffrey Banks, a senior finance major. “It’s nice to have the opportunity to see them perform to give me hope for my own future.”

Photo courtesy of Breitbart News

B.o.B. shows off his new hat to match his new life outlook.

College president ‘Gits’ the pipe on TV

By Chris Harrison King of the Hoes Things are starting to heat up on the “Bachelorette,” with the Git down to just two spicy suitors to choose from. In this week’s episode, Git and the men traveled to the exotic island of Bora Bora for some much needed alone time. Front-runner Ryan Gosling finally told Git that he is falling in love with her, much to the fans’ content. They sat and discussed the same shit that they do in every episode, nothing apparently truthful or substantial, over dinner, which they did not actually eat. Git then whipped out the key to the

fantasy suite, which Gosling willingly accepted. They then were whisked away to a luxury bedroom seemingly in the middle of nowhere, where they will spend the night together, definitely playing Uno to test the strength of their relationship. I mean, come on. If he hits her with a draw four, it’s over. The next day was underdog Zac Efron’s Bora Bora date extravaganza. Efron really impressed Git on their snorkeling date after fighting off several advancing tiger sharks and managing to sneak in a kiss underwater that still was caught on film by the crew because they are everywhere. Later on, they, too, were treated to a fancy dinner that neither of them ate as they discussed the same shit that Gosling and Git just discussed the night prior. Git then offered Efron the fantasy suite date, and when she did, he told her he loved her. “Git, it’s only been four weeks, but I’ve never felt this way about anyone before,” Efron said. “This could be the start of something new. I love you.” Git, who is not allowed to openly express her love for either of the contestants in order to justify the fact that she is dating multiple men, contently smiled

at Efron. They kissed passionately over their untouched salmon and he carried her off to the fantasy suite, which was conveniently right behind their dinner table on the beach.

Next week’s episode will feature the “morning after” for both men. And, will the love that both men have for Git be returned when one finally proposes back at the College in front of Green Hall? Stay tuned.

John Filo / CBS

The Git and potential suitor Efron taking a stroll down Bora Bora

Singal

SLuts

GIT READY 4 DA EVEVENT OF DA CENTURAAY By Vince McMahon WWE Chairman WWE has decided to move “The Ultimate Thrillride” Wrestlemania 33 from the previously advertised Camping World Stadium in Orlando, Fla. Now on Sunday, April 2, the event will be broadcasted live from Lions Stadium in beautiful Ewing, N.J., and will feature the hottest feuds in campus history. After years of being bombarded with emails and tweets asking for snow days, even when the weather only calls for a coating, Dave “the Meteorologist” Muha has had enough! He now thinks every student at the College should make up every snow day. “Let’s see if wearing some dumb ‘Pray for Muha’ T-shirts and insideout pajamas at night saves you from that!” Muha told The Singal during an interview in his evil lair in the Bliss Hall basement. Muha’s signature move, “The Ice Breaker,” where he picks an opponent up before bringing their back down hard on his knee, has laid out foe after foe. With no end in sight, it seemed no one could stop him. In the other corner, Muha will

Photo courtesy of Brian Williams

The GIT shows no mercy against her foes.

be facing the man who’s been a thorn in his side for years. The man students look toward when it comes to weather, and the man who has been meddling in Muha’s world for too long. “This Sunday, I’m gonna bring some pain to your neck of the woods, Muha,” Al “The Ruckus” Roker proclaimed. “I lay you out flat in that ring for the 1, 2, 3, and no student will ever need to worry

about a snow day again!” The two will face off in a “STUD Street fight,” where any item from the Brower Student Center may be used as a weapon, including construction equipment. John Cena was originally scheduled to compete against Muha, however, WWE representatives have yet to see him. Also seeing action on Sunday, “The Queen” Eve Cruz returns

from her exile to reclaim her Lions Women’s Championship. “My little bosses know that when I come into that ring, I mean business,” Cruz said. “I ain’t ready to lie down yet. Not this time Sodexo, ha!” She will be taking on defending champion, the College President Bobby “Barb-Wire” Gitenstein. Her Tuition Clothesline and Loser Hall Lariat have

seemed unstoppable during her half-year reign. Will the returning fan favorite be able to dethrone the Git? Finally, the Student Finance Board “Battle Royal” will surely be a crowd favorite! All College groups and organizations will start in the ring and compete for the last of SFB’s reserves. They’ll need to throw other organization members over the top rope by any means necessary, before one man or woman is left victorious. The president of the College’s Circus Club says she and her team are the most prepared for the event. “We excel at balancing, flexibility and juggling,” she said. “We’re going out there and showing who the real clowns are at this school!” For many groups, this may be the only way any of them receive more funding before the end of the semester. Meaning any special events and guest speakers fringe on their ability to lift their fellow students out of the ring. The event will be free at the gate for all those with College IDs and will be available on PayPer-View for only $9.99!

Lord Belichick ready to lead Lions Football to greatness By Skip Bayless TebowLUVR2258 After six consecutive losing seasons, the Lions football team is cleaning house, cutting ties with anyone that ever set foot in Lions Stadium. In search of the elusive winning season, the new coaching staff is looking in unusual places. The College has hired long-time New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick. Belichick brought his entire coaching staff along with him in hopes of turning the football team’s losing streak around. “I got tired of winning Super Bowls, so I decided to try to take another team to an elite status,” Belichick said. “I just picked a college name out of a hat and TCNJ was it. Maybe we can win five or six national titles before I try to help the Browns win a Super Bowl.” With a revamped coaching staff, there have been many changes to the team’s recruiting targets. The coaching staff began poaching lacrosse and field hockey players, as well as men’s soccer players and club bowling players to develop a winning culture. When questioned about their strange tactics, Belichick simply shrugged and continued to slightly deflate the Lions footballs. “I never thought about playing football, but if I’m guaranteed to win a national title,

Fuck bitches git $

H e r p e s

I’ll give it a shot,” said senior Ben Dover, a former men’s soccer player looking to make the switch. “He won five Super Bowls. He can do anything! I bet he could even help Rutgers beat a Big Ten opponent.” The NCAA has also preemptively recognized every player on the roster as an All-American, before they take the field for the first time. “He took a sixth-round quarterback and turned him into the greatest of all time,” said Wayne Kerr, NCAA commissioner. “If these players can walk in a straight line and occasionally catch a ball, they will shatter records. Might as well recognize them now.” With the change of direction and hope for the team, the College also experienced an unusual increase of athletes trying to transfer to the College. Some players from the nation’s elite Division I teams are trying to make the change to the humble little school, and the Office of Admissions is having trouble accepting them. “When I heard about this team, I was like ‘Fuck this year’s NFL draft! I’m gonna do what (Jim) Harbaugh never could and win a title!” said Jabrill Peppers, junior linebacker, a former Michigan University Wolverine and reigning Big Ten Defensive Player of the Year. Belichick is now requesting for football to become a new major at the College,

LaVar Ball Couldn’t pull out in time

Photo courtesy of Jim McNally

Belichick ’bout to turn Division III players into NFL Draft picks. along with a drone cinematography and PSI fabrication. “With football becoming a major, we are confident our players can be set up for the most success without compromising their education,” said the newly renamed President W. Barbara Gitenstein, who is “prepared to rack up them W’s from free-

Ian Kinsler ‘I love Puerto Ricans’

ass bitches like Montclair State.” The Lions are guaranteed to win a title next year, but it’s uncertain how every other sports team will fare without their star athletes. Gitenstein put it best: “They’ll be fine. We can always pour money into better field construction or some shit.”

Colin Kaepernick Tries out for TCNJ Football

Around the Dorm Returns for Good