Credit Contracts and Consumer Finance bill leaflet

A love letter to the National Party from your (not so) secret admirers Our darling Nats, We can’t hold it in any longer. We just had to say it: we love you. You’ve done more for us than any Government in recent memory. From the moment you walked into Parliament, calculator in hand, we knew you were different. Others talked about fairness, accountability, consumer rights... But you saw us. Truly saw us. While Kiwis tried to hold us to account for dodgy lending and false disclosures, you stepped in. You’re changing the law especially for us! Retrospectively! We don’t know how we’ll ever repay you (and, thanks to you, we won’t have to). When our lawyers panicked about consumer class actions, you soothed us. Our problems were solved. What’s a little rule of law between friends? We adore your boldness. Your discretion. Your devotion to keeping us one step ahead (ASB sends its love). Sure, critics say it undermines consumer protection, damages New Zealand’s reputation and is totally counter to the rule of law. But what’s a little reputational risk compared to our record profits? Forever yours (in profit), ASB & ANZ