SGN Dec 16, 2022 by (c) Stratus Group, LLC / Mike Schultz

ISSUE 50

C E L E B R AT I N G

VOLUME 50

48 YEARS

F R I D AY

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BIDEN SIGNS RESPECT FOR MARRIAGE ACT INTO LAW by A.V. Eichenbaum SGN Editor-in-Chief President Joe Biden signed the Respect for Marriage Act into law at a ceremony on the White House South Lawn Tuesday, November 13. The ceremony was attended by congressmembers of both parties, signifying the growing acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community across the country despite continued right-wing attacks on Trans rights this year.

President Joe Biden signs the Respect for Marriage Act, Tue. Dec. 13, 2022, on the South Lawn of the White House – Photo by Kevin Lamarque / Reuters

see MARRIAGE page 17

Texas AG demands list of Transgender residents No reason given for demand

Teenaged pop-rock sensation THEM sells out first headlining show

Photo by Brian Snyder / Reuters

by Mike Andrew SGN Staff Writer Texas Attorney general Ken Paxton demanded that the state’s Department of Public Safety (DPS) turn over a list of people who changed their gender markers on Texas driver’s licenses and other state IDs, according to new reporting by the Washington Post.

Photo by Georgia Skerritt

Using a public records request, the newspaper says it obtained emails from Texas officials asking for the information. “Need total number of changes from male to female and female to male for the last 24 months, broken down by month,” the chief of the DPS’s driver license division emailed colleagues in the department on June 30.

see TEXAS page 18

by Georgia Skerritt SGN Intern When Seattle-based pop-rock band THEM took to the stage at Barboza on December 9 for their first headline performance, they had learned only a few hours earlier that the show was sold out. Members Thompson, Hudson, Ellie, and Maia — who put the initials of their first

names together to create the band’s name — have been playing music together since 2017, but last Friday was their first opportunity to headline a show. They played to a full house, one that was packed with eager fans and family members and overflowed with enthusiastic energy.

see THEM page 9

At Chateau Ste. Michelle our wines are a force for gatherings and conversations— to serve the well-being of our consumers, our communities, and our land. We are a proud ally and supporter of all our employees and customers within the LGBTQIA+ community and aim to create an inclusive environment where everyone is welcome.

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Local News

AgePRIDE on “measuring the magic” of generations united

by Daniel Lindsley SGN Staff Writer Generation gaps are nothing new, but with technology advancing quickly and the pandemic keeping people of all ages apart, isolation and loneliness have risen sharply in the United States. The Goldsen Institute of Washington has been working to address that problem with its Legacy Letters program, which blends research-based and trauma-informed methods to help build lasting bridges between the generations. Its second session begins on January 26, and signups are open. AgePRIDE Healthy Generations, an arm of the Goldsen Institute, has already one run of its Legacy Letters programs. It brought together elders from the Southeast Seattle Senior Center and teenagers from Franklin, Cleveland, and Rainier Beach high schools for five sessions of conversation, reflective writing, and public speaking, culminating in a personal letter to other generations. Program manager Laura Culberg shared the institute’s findings over Zoom. “One of the things we’ve learned through the research is that older adults — particularly underserved or more marginalized older adults — have higher rates of isolation and loneliness,” she said. On an emotional level, it’s not difficult to see why that trend is a bad thing. But research makes it even clearer: the Harvard Study of Adult Development found that people middle-aged and older were three times more likely to be happy if they were engaged in caring for and developing younger generations. “We live in a really age-segregated society in this country,” Culberg went on, “so there are very few opportunities to integrate like that.” One might wonder, then, what’s in it for the younger people. As it turns out, after the pandemic, their need for connections might be even greater. “The first time that we [ran the program], we actually found that the younger adults — the teenagers in this case — had higher rates of loneliness than the older adults,” Culberg said, referring to follow up surveys. Aislinn Conroy is facilitating the Legacy Letters program now, “but I’m not a researcher,” they said in a phone interview.

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“I work on the translational action side.” (“Translational” refers to applying research in ways that directly benefit people.) Culberg is the one guiding the participants in person, observing their growth, and “measuring the magic,” as Culberg put it. “It’s just so wholesome,” Conroy said. “It’s the most wholesome job that I’ve ever had because my purpose is to encourage people to bond and create conditions where people feel comfortable being vulnerable. And they do that.” Conroy is certainly the person for the job; they have a background in trauma processing. Of course, a process this delicate doesn’t always go off without a hitch, especially when many participants are gathering in public for the first time in years. “It will come to nobody’s surprise that ageism affects us at a cultural level, and it shows up in our sessions together,” Conroy said. “But I wouldn’t say it’s a challenge so much as a part of what makes it interesting. It creates really rich discussions.” “For example,” they went on, “in the South Seattle program, we had an extended

conversation about pronoun usage, because what tends to be different between younger folks and older folks is that the vocabulary that they use is totally different.” Those who visited family for Thanksgiving, even in a fairly progressive household, might have heard a joke or two about gender identity from older relatives. But you might have also gotten a look confusion from an older Queer person at the mention of demisexuality. Generational differences in vocabulary, Conroy said, are in some ways wider in the Queer community, “where younger folks are like, ‘Why can’t you just get it right?’ And older folks are like, ‘We’re trying.’ But there’s a deeper story there.” Younger Queer people might not fully grasp the weight of what older generations have gone through. “Sometimes I think that, especially with the Silent Generation (born between 1928 and 1945), they see these younger folks that are really out and open, and there’s a sense of pride,” Conroy said. “But also, they didn’t get that. They grew up when Gay

marriage was illegal, so it’s complicated.” “But what’s really special is that it’s such a small group, and it’s really a createyour-own-adventure type of program,” they went on. “So we get to make space to have those kinds of conversations.” Each session may be small, but as the program grows, AgePRIDE will hold reunions open to participants of all past events. Far from a detached form of education, Legacy Letters intends to build lasting relationships — and so far, Culberg said, it seems to be working. “I think part of seeing someone as a person is understanding them within their context,” Conroy said, “and within their lived experience.” Young, old, or in between, you can find out more about AgePRIDE and the Goldsen Institute at https://goldseninstitute.org/ agepride/, and sign up for the LGBTQspecific winter session of the Legacy Letters program at https://redcap.iths.org/ surveys/?s=AD7KCK34YEWJJ934. The program begins at the UW Russell Hall Building on January 26 next year.

Photos courtesy of the Goldsen Institute

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Renton LGBTQ+ community stands in support with drag queen story hour by Lindsey Anderson SGN Staff Writer No rain nor bigotry could wash out the joyous display of pride, solidarity, and support that gathered outside Brewhouse Pub in Renton on Saturday, December 10. Live speakers, a brass band, and community organizers showed up for a crowd of nearly a hundred people in support of both Brewhouse Pub and the drag queens the bar had recruited for a new story hour. Bigots attack Brewhouse Brewhouse Pub became the center of controversy earlier in the week when rightwing protesters took to the internet and later the streets outside the bar to condemn the pub for introducing a new community engagement project known as “drag queen story hour.” The uproar reached violent new heights on Wednesday, December 7, when the front window of the business was shot at by a protester. An employee of a nearby coffee shop reported that they saw the shooter fleeing the scene in an unmarked car. The vandalism of Brewhouse Pub came on the heels of increased violence toward the Queer community and left many in the Seattle area shaken. Despite the fears that further retaliation could ensue, many brave LGBTQ+ people and allies organized a solidarity rally to show support for the business. Community members spread love and demand action “We need people to know that we are here, we are a force, and also to make spaces that are safe and brave for our community, and to make sure that all of us get represented in every area,” said one of the protest organizers, Andrew Ashiofu. “I am here today to continue to stand with my community members for our safety,” added fellow organizer Deaunte Damper. “We just thought we were going to close the year with murders, but here we are in this space to advocate for our community members at Brewhouse. There’s nothing wrong with getting read a book. And we need to continue talking about inclusivity. We’re here today not only to protect ourselves, but to demand safety and demand public safety for us, and that also goes to policy change for our people.” While most gathered outside Brewhouse to stand in solidarity, especially with the drag queens and children impacted by the hatred and violence of protesters, many also used the moment to call on people in leadership positions to do more when it comes to protecting LGBTQ+ people. “[Hatred] continues as our politicians and media continue to make LGBTQ communities a target so they can win elections, so they can take power in Congress when we need to be fighting back and we need to be fighting for our families, too. It is all of us here that makes our community protected,” shared speaker Winter Coffman. Ashiofu also took to the mic to remind those in attendance that when hatred goes unchecked it spreads beyond just the borders of the United States. “What we don’t know is that hatred spreads globally,” he said. “A lot of anti-LGBTQ+ rights groups in Nigeria and [elsewhere in] Africa were sponsored by right-wing American Christians, and I have to stress this, no offense, white right-wing American Christians. So this also has connections to racism, homophobia, anti-feminism, transphobia, everything is rooted in America, but we need to start destroying these [ideologies],” he said. Fighting hatred with joy Prominent LGBTQ+ leaders also showed up to the event, not only as a sign of solidarity but also as a sign of bravery and resilience in the face of those who were trying to use fear to keep them at home. Seattle Pride Vice President Gabby Pennisi voiced her pride in the community that had rallied in the pouring rain to show their love for their LGBTQ+

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Photos by Lindsey Anderson

siblings. “I am saddened that we have to be here today, but I am joyful that we are here in such numbers. I am so happy that there are things like this continuing to happen and that no one is scared to continue filling this space up with such a wonderful thing that’s happening. Thank you everybody for coming and braving this rain,” she said. City Councilmember Carmen Riviera was also one of the leading speakers and organizers who showed up to the event. “I’m here because there was a group that was going to organize a protest against this beautiful drag queen story hour that was happening right here in Renton, Washington, right down the street from where I live. As one of the first Queer council members, when a community member reached out to me about this, it was my responsibility to then reach out to the most impacted business and see what they wanted me to do and then we decided to do a counterprotest,” she said. “I have an amazing community here in Renton. I just try to uplift and enhance people’s voices in this community in Renton who are Queer and are directly impacted. The drag queens were impacted. Our kids were impacted! I want to use my position in power to uplift young voices and make them feel empowered,” she continued. On the mic, Riviera also thanked those who braved the cold and the threats of violence to stand in support. “I want to give everyone here a round of applause for being here. I don’t know if you found out on Facebook, on Twitter, on TikTok, I don’t know how you found out about this, but it’s incredible to see so many amazing people come out with just a simple call,” she said. “I knew we were going to outnumber them. I knew it because there’s so much more love here than there ever has been hatred, and they aren’t even here because they know, they know, they know. They know our kids are safer with our [drag] queens and with

our community and with love than with bigotry and ignorance and hate that’s fueled by awful right-wing agendas that are meant to divide this country rather than bring us together,” she continued. Anti-LGBTQ+ protesters too scared to show up As Riviera pointed out, the antiLGBTQ+ protesters who were supposed to arrive outside Brewhouse in throngs never showed up. Instead, just two protesters paced the street across from the bar, unable to even get a look at the festivities through a strong line of Queer security. “Her name is Katie Daviscourt. She dubbed herself the Proud Boy Barbie, she’s a known fascist, she’s full of hate,” explained LGBTQ+ ally and protester Kristie, describing one of the two anti-LGBTQ+ protestors. “And that’s Jonathan Cho. He used to work for KOMO News, but he got fired. They’re both Proud Boys. She dubbed herself the Proud Boy Barbie and he got fired from KOMO for supporting the Proud Boys.” While the hateful anti-LGBTQ+ protesters thought they might have scared off the Queer community with attempts at violence earlier in the week, they were ultimately the ones too afraid to come out, perhaps because they knew the Queer community would band together to protect one another. One member of the community who showed up to ensure their friends and family would remain safe was Kai, a member of the Guardian Rebellion. “We’re here to make sure that Queer people have the right to go and do what they want to do,” he said. “The hatred that we’ve seen across the country recently is fucking ridiculous, and when we heard there were possibly people protesting this event we just knew we had to show up. I’m amazed seeing all the people today. We’re here to make sure this event goes off safely and smoothly for everyone.”

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“We’re stronger together” Everyone who showed up on Saturday was met with pure joy, from throwback emo hits and Lil Nas X bops blasted out by the brass band to the jubilant speakers and clever activist signs. However, the day could not have been a full success without the opportunity to hear from the drag performers themselves. Dominique Stevens lit up the crowd when they took to the microphone to spread their message of inclusivity. “As a drag performer, as a drag king, a proud drag king, I want to let y’all know this message is seemingly for the outside naysayers, but they’re gonna all die off soon. And in that process of them eliminating themselves, this is the time when we stand united with every network, every power, every being and make that peace and make sure that this stays a place of peace,” they said. “We’re going into 2023. This shit is redundant. Our grandparents would do this. Our great-grandparents would do this. We don’t want the unborn generation to have to go through this. We stand strong, we stand united, there are lawyers out here, there are other organizers out here, there are even some people who might want to slap a bitch out here, and we support them too, okay? So what I’m saying is we band together, we never let this tiny-ass bullet in this space faze us. You cannot eliminate us, okay? Anytime they try to step up and take us out, remind them every single time that you are a microcosm in the universe and your shit doesn’t matter because our shit is more important than what you are trying to do. So, in a message of love, continue to show up and know that your power makes us better when we’re stronger together.” Love won in Renton as brave Queers and allies showed up and showed the haters that violence, threats, and bigotry will never silence resilient drag queens.

SGN

Seattle Pride Spotlight

Remembering those lost in 2022

Photo by Nothing Ahead / Pexels

by Lindsey Anderson SGN Staff Writer 2022 has been a rough year for many in the Queer community. While much has been lost, from people to institutions, the continued importance of supporting those around us, cherishing those who are still here, and remembering those who are not is not lost. As the year rolls to an end, may we all take a moment to reflect on who we lost and the legacies they have left behind.

Derrick Rump, Daniel Ashton, Ashley Paugh, Kelly Loving, and Raymond Green Vance – Courtesy photos

Remembering lives lost at Club Q On Saturday, November 19, an armed assailant opened fire on patrons of Club Q, a Gay bar in Colorado Springs, Colorado. Thanks to the quick action of brave bar patrons, the shooter was disarmed, but not before they had injured 19 and killed 5. The people who lost their lives in Club Q should never have had to worry about danger when going to a bar. Their lives were cut short by hatred and bigotry. They don’t deserve to be remembered forever as victims, as reasons to fear the consequences of expressing Queer joy. So instead, we will remember them for who they were: complex, loving, brave people. Derrick Rump was the heart of Club Q. He was a kind man who expressed joy and love to everyone around him. His friends described him as “pint-sized” and “the energy of Club Q.” He loved his job as a bartender, and patrons and coworkers alike said he made the bar feel like home. Rump was lively and known to bop to Britney Spears. Rump was 38 and a transplant to Colo-

rado from Pennsylvania. He worked several odd jobs around Colorado Springs before finding his perfect fit at Club Q. He was protective and was the first to step in when a bar fight broke out, despite his small stature. He was “out and proud,” as many of his friends have reported. He loved being a Gay man and loved the community that he found in support of his identity. Daniel Ashton was a bar supervisor at Club Q. “He was the best supervisor anybody could’ve asked for,” one of his coworkers, Michael Anderson later recalled. “He made me want to come in to work, and he made me want to be a part of the positive culture we were trying to create there.” Ashton’s demeanor made him popular with everyone he met. Ashton was friendly to everyone, even as a child. He came out to his parents as a toddler, but he wouldn’t come out officially until a decade later. He was an entertainer at heart, a poet, a dramatist, and a lover of fashion. Ashley Paugh was a caregiver. She spent

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her life taking care of and showing love to those most in need. Above all, however, she was a mother. Her daughter, Ryleigh, was “her whole world,” her family said in a statement released after her death. Paugh worked at a nonprofit called Kids Crossing, where she helped foster children connect with adoptive parents. She was a fierce ally to the LGBTQ+ community who often helped Queer parents get into fostering. She was also an avid outdoorswoman who loved to spend her downtime hunting, fishing, and riding four-wheelers. Kelly Loving had the most perfect name. To everyone around her, she was a gift, but especially to the Trans community, where she often took on the role of “Trans mother.” She was a fearless mentor to many. Loving was full of confidence, which she used to help young Trans people see how wonderful their lives could be. “She was fearless. She was a welcoming person. She would give you the shirt off her back if you were asking for it, or the last

dollar to her name, she would give it to you. She would give anything and everything to anyone,” one of her close friends, Natalee Skye Bingham said of Loving, who embodied the meaning of sisterhood through everything she did. Raymond Green Vance was a hard worker who had just secured a new job with FedEx. The 22-year-old was saving up his paychecks so he could move out of his mother’s home and into his apartment with his longtime girlfriend. Vance loved video games and hoped to turn his passion for them into a career as a streamer online. Vance loved his family and especially his girlfriend, Kassy Fierro, whom he had been dating since they were in middle school. He spent most of his free time with her and would often talk about what their future together might look like. He was a selfless person who was always putting the needs of others above his own.

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C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

REMEMBER THEIR NAMES

A tribute brought to you in partnership with Seattle Pride Diamond Jackson- McDonald • 27-year-old Black Trans woman • Remembered by loved ones as a “loving person” and “gem” • Killed on Thanksgiving Day in Philadelphia Daniel Aston • 28-year-old Trans man • One of two Trans people killed in the Club Q mass shooting in Colorado on November 20, 2022 • Bartender at Club Q • Parents described him as “the happiest he had ever been.” Kelly Loving • 40-year-old Trans woman • One of two Trans people killed in the Club Q shooting in Colorado on November 20, 2022 • Described by her sister as “loving” and someone “always trying to help the next person out instead of thinking of herself. She was just a caring person.” Tiffany Banks • 25-year-old Black Trans woman • Killed in Miami on October 1, 2022 • Family and friends describe her as a “sociable and beautiful butterfly” • She loved to sing and dance Semaj Billingslea • 33-year-old Black Trans man • Graduate from of Florida Youth Academy and a student at Florida State College in Jacksonville • Fan of Megan Thee Stallion • Killed on September 21 in Jacksonville, Florida Acey Morrison • 30-year-old Two-Spirit person • Described as “kind- hearted, down to earth, joyous, respectful, and loving” • Remembered as always being there for friends and family • Shot in Rapid City, South Dakota, on August 21, 2022 Mya Allen • 35-year-old Black Trans woman • Loved fashion and makeup • Member of Sisters Helping Each Other Battle Adversity (SHEBA) • Killed on August 29th in Milwaukee, Wisconsin Dede Ricks • 33-year-old Black Trans woman • Shot in Detroit on August 27th, 2022 • A suspect has been arrested and charged with murder and felony firearm Maddie Hofmann • 47-year-old Trans woman born in Korea and raised in the US by their adoptive family • Killed by police in Malvern, Pennsylvania on May 19, 2022 • She was one of six siblings and shared a close bond with her youngest sister, who was also adopted from Korea Aaron Lynch • 26-year-old Trans man • Shot and killed by police in McLean, Virginia on July 7th, 2022 • Was experiencing a mental health crisis and was first initially unsuccessfully tased by police after some back- andforth discourse • He was shot four times by an officer

Kandii “‘Dee Dee”’ Redd • A 29 -year-old Black Trans woman • Killed in Kansas City on July 24, 2022 • She was a model and a performer • She was originally misgendered in police reports. Police also believe her murder came occurred after an argument with an intimate partner Hayden Davis • 28 -year-old Black Trans woman • Loved fashion and the Kardashians, skincare and makeup • Killed in Detroit on July 25, 2022, after jumping out of a moving vehicle and fleeing her murderer on foot Marisela Castro • 39-year-old Latina Trans woman • Killed at her birthday celebration in the North Shore neighborhood of Houston, Texas • Was described as a bright and sunny person • She was an immigrant from Honduras Cherry Bush • 48-year-old Trans woman • She was experiencing homelessness • Killed on July 5, 2022, after being targeted and disparaged due to her gender identity • A suspect has been arrested and charged with murder and a hate crime Keshia Chanel Geter • A 26-year-old Black Trans woman • Killed in Augusta, Georgia, while traveling with a friend on July 20, 2022 • Her mother believes she was killed explicitly because she was Trans • A suspect has been arrested Martasia Richmond • 30-year-old Black Trans woman • Killed in Chicago on July 11, 2022 • Police believe her death to be the result of domestic violence Kitty Monroe • Black Trans woman • Mother to four small dogs named Chyna, Milan, Tokyo, and London • Killed outside Memphis in Cordova, Tennessee, on June 29, 2022 • Her death is suspected to be the result of domestic violence Shawmaynè Giselle Marie • 27-year-old Black Trans woman • Certified nursing assistant and who scheduled to begin working as a travel CNA a week after her death • Killed in Gulfport, Mississippi, on June 21, 2022 • Her 14-year-old sister was also shot at the time • She was deadnamed in original reports • She was is remembered for her perfect makeup, love for Nikki Minaj, and willingness to twerk at the slightest opportunity Brazil Johnson • Black Trans woman • LGBTQ+ activist and member of Diverse and Reslient • Talented chef • Killed in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, on June 15, 2022

Sasha Mason • 45-year-old Latina Trans woman • Killed on May 13, 2022, in Zebulon, North Carolina • Remembered by friends and family as a “sweet, kind, generous person with a beautiful smile.” • Police have arrested two suspects they think are involved in the robbery-homicide that led to her death. Police believe the attack was targeted and that she knew the suspects Chanelika Y’Ella Dior Hemingway • 30-year-old Black Trans woman • GA graduate from of Albany High School, Hudson Valley Community College, and University of Albany • Recipient of the 2022 Spellman Academic Achievement Award Nedra Sequence Morris • 50-year-old Black Trans woman • Killed on May 14, 2022, in Opa Locka, Florida • More than 100 people showed up to a vigil for her at the intersection where her body was found Ray Muscat • A 24-year-old Trans man • Worked at a grocery store • Killed on May 8, 2022, when he was shot by his girlfriend in Independence Township, Michigan • According to police reports, his girlfriend also killed her brother before killing herself the next day Fern Feather • 29-year-old Trans woman (she/they) • Killed in Morristown, Vermont, on April 12, 2022 • Said to “bring joy” to everyone around her • Loved animals, especially birds Ariyanna Mitchell • 17-year-old Black Trans girl • Killed on April 2, 2022, in Hampton, Virginia while attending a party and attempting to defend her friend in a fight She was shot after being asked whether she was a girl or a boy • Described as “truly unique, funny, and loved by everyone” • Local media initially deadnamed and misgendered her in their original reports • Police reported that her family misgendered her as well, although her obituary contradicted that Miia Love Parker • 25-year-old Black Trans woman • Killed in Chester, Pennsylvania, on April 1, 2022 • Described as a “bright light in many lives” • Fan of the show Pose Kenyatta “‘Kesha”’ Webster • 24-year-old Black Trans woman • Found dead in Jackson, Mississippi, on March 26, 2022 • Over one hundred people attended a memorial balloon release in her honor • Her mother, who she was very close with, is still demanding justice for her daughter

Kathryn “‘Katie’” Newhouse • 19-year-old AAPI, neurodivergent Trans woman • Killed by her father in Georgia on March 19, 2022 • Her father had previously been arrested for assaulting her when she was 16 • Passionate about hiking, sightseeing, and advocating for Trans rights Tatiana Labelle • 33-year-old Black Trans woman • Fan of Mariah Carey and Patti Labelle • Found dead in Chicago on March 18, 2022 • Detectives are still investigating her death but have ruled it a homicide • Tatiana has repeatedly been misgendered in several police reports Paloma Vazquez • 29 -year-old Latina Trans woman • Member of the Organización Latina de Trans en Texas, an organization for Trans Latina women in Houston • Shot on February 22, 2022 • She had just moved into her new apartment and was excited to decorate it • She immigrated to America the United States just six months before her death Matthew Angelo Spampinato • 21-year-old Trans man • Victim of a hit-and-run on February 9, 2022, in New Castle, Delaware • Worked as a barista at Starbucks • Described by coworkers as “selfless” • Matthew was in his first year of physical transition, after waiting four years to finally get a prescription for testosterone. He said he first knew he was Trans when he was 13 Naomie Skinner • 25 -year-old Black Trans woman • Fatally shot by her boyfriend on February 12, 2022, new near Detroit in Highland Park, Michigan • Described by her friends as “very outstanding” and her sister said she lived a “fabulous life” Cypress Ramos • 21 -year-old Latina Trans woman • Found dead in a storage unit on February 12th in Lubbock, Texas • A suspect has been charged with her murder. He claimed to have first seen her when she was leaving the restroom • She was a local drag performer as well Duval Princess • 24 -year-old Black Trans woman • Hairstylist in Jacksonville, Florida, who specialized in wigs and weaves • Described as “sweet and genuine” • Had just come out as a Trans woman • Shot to death on January 3rd, 2022 Amariey Lei • 20-year-old Black Trans woman • DA dancer and coach for the Lady Diamonds, a hip-hop and majorette dance team • Killed on January 1, 2022 • Police have yet to find any leads on who may have killed her

PATTERNS: The majority of the Trans people killed in 2022 were women and BIPOC. The majority of the deaths were the result of gunshot wounds. 21% of murdered Trans people are in an intimate relationship with their murderer. While 32 Trans people were reported murdered in the U.S. in 2022, the number is likely much higher because many murders go unreported or victims are misgendered.

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DECEMBER 16, 2 0 2 2

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Seattle Pride Spotlight MEMORIAM

continued from page 6 Remembering Washington Activists Activists are the heart and soul of the LGBTQ+ community, often working long and grueling hours to help make the places they call home safer and more welcoming for the next generation. This year, we lost several valuable activists, far too soon. Sandy Williams was a racial justice activist in Spokane, Wa. She founded the activist newspaper The Black Lens and the Carl Maxey Community Center as hubs for the Black community in Eastern Washington. Her dedication to BIPOC communities in Spokane was monumental, and she was wellknown for not only her activism but also her ability to get things done. She served on the board of the Carl Maxey Community Center as well as being editor of The Black Lens. Sandy and her partner, Patricia Hicks, were two of the victims of the Whidbey Remembering LGBTQ+ Celebrities Kevin Conroy was perhaps best known as Batman. He voiced the iconic character in hundreds of cartoons and film adaptations of the classic comic. On November 10, at age 66, he lost his battle with intestinal cancer. Conroy faced discrimination throughout his career as a voice actor and, as a result, remained publicly closeted for much of his life. He came out as Gay in 2016, and in 2022 he published the autobiographical “Finding Batman” — about his journey as a Gay man — in the DC Comics DC Pride anthology. Aaron Carter was an American rapper, singer, and songwriter. He rose to popularity in the 90s with his studio album Aaron’s Party (Come Get It) and opened for several mainstream talents like the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears. Carter came out as Bisexual in 2017 on Twitter. He died on November 5 in his home in Lancaster, California, at the age of 34. Remembering Seattle institutions Often the places we gather can feel more like characters in our lives than simple locations. This year, Seattle lost several well-established businesses. Seattle Counseling Services closed its doors in April after nearly 50 years of serving the community. “Many factors have led the Seattle Counseling Service board to make this decision, mainly financial,” SCS leadership said in an announcement earlier this year. Several Capitol Hill restaurants and cafes closed their doors due to financial hardship as well. After 25 years of business, Joe Bar, a popular Capitol Hill cafe, closed its doors in October. Glo’s, a well-known Capitol Hill diner, closed its doors due to a fire that damaged the exterior and walls of the building. The owner, Julie Reisman, has plans to open up a new Glo’s location near the light rail station soon. On October 29, Kedai Makan, a Malaysian restaurant known by many to be the best Malaysian food in Seattle, permanently closed its doors as well. In the Roosevelt neighborhood, Wayward Vegan Cafe closed its doors after having been open since 2004. The popular restaurant was known for making vegan versions of American comfort foods. Eastlake Bar and Grill, a neighborhood gathering spot for many, also shut down to make way for apartment buildings that will begin construction at the beginning of the year. After 39 years in business, Hales Ales, an iconic craft beer joint in Fremont, will also be closing, due to the retirement of owner Mike Hale. 2022 has been a year of many losses, but through it all, we are reminded to hold those dear to us a little closer, to tell our loved ones how much they mean to us, and to not put off our dreams. Here’s to 2023: may we heal through the pain, thrive through struggle, and find glamor in every day.

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Sandy Williams, Erez Benari, Robert Masters, Lester Gruner, and Sheldon Jacobs – Courtesy photos

Island seaplane accident that claimed the lives of ten people on September 4th. Erez Benari was a Seattle local, an activist, and a doctor loved by many. He spent much of his life advocating for polyamory activism throughout the LGBTQ+ community. Unfortunately, he also struggled with diabetes, metabolic syndrome, and chronic kidney disease. Benari decided to end his own life via euthanasia surrounded by his many loving partners on November 6. Robert Masters was an active member of

Seattle’s LGBTQ+ community after moving to Washington with his partner Larry in 1989. Masters and Larry spent 53 years together, entertaining friends, watching football, and traveling to six different continents. Masters is remembered as a kind, loving, and considerate person. Lester Gruner was a well-known face on Capitol Hill. He moved to Seattle in 1982 and quickly made friends in Seattle’s Queer community. Gruner was an avid adventurer, albeit not an outdoorsman per se.

He loved to explore new places with his many friends, volunteered with the Pride Foundation, and was a doting pet parent to his two cats and Great Dane. Sheldon Jacobs was a leader in Seattle’s leather community. Born in 1928, he lived a life of adventure and glamor. Jacobs served in the US army, performed on Broadway in New York City, and toured the country singing in the 1960s. He was named Seattle’s Leather Grandad in 1995.

Kevin Conroy, Aaron Carter, Patrick Haggerty, Leslie Jordan – Courtesy photos

Patrick Haggerty was the first openly Gay country singer in the United States. He formed his band, Lavender Country, in Seattle Washington in 1972, and he released the first Gay country music album in music history. From 2001 to 2003 he fronted Doug Stevens & the Outband and also released an album with Pearl River in 2003. He died of complications from a stroke on October 31 at the age of 78.

Leslie Jordan was an American actor best known for his roles in Will and Grace and American Horror Story. He was very outspoken about his identity as a Gay man. During the AIDS crisis, he became involved in AIDS Project Los Angeles, providing food and comfort to those suffering. He received an Emmy for his portrayal of Beverley Leslie in Will and Grace in 2006. Jordan became a viral sensation on Tik-

Tok during the COVID-19 lockdown, providing comedic relief through his content. He also released an album of gospel music in 2021 called Company’s Comin’. He died on October 24 while driving to the set of his latest sitcom, Call Me Kat, when he experienced a medical episode behind the wheel and crashed his car into the side of a building. He was 67 years old.

Seattle Counseling Service, Joe Bar, Glo’s, Kedai Makan, Wayward Vegan Cafe, Eastlake Bar & Grill, Hale’s Ales – Courtesy photos

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Arts & Entertainment

THEM

continued from cover “We didn’t meet through school; we actually met through music lessons,” keyboardist and band manager Ellie told the SGN on Sunday. The four teenagers, all from West Seattle, were introduced to each other by a teacher at Mode Music Studios, where they were taking private lessons. After a couple years of group lessons and covers of popular songs, in early 2020 the women decided they wanted to start writing their own music together. Since then, the band has evolved into the rapidly growing pop music sensation it is today. Previously, THEM played alongside artists like Blu DeTiger, Dayglow, and Duckwrth. But last weekend, the whole crowd was there to hear THEM headlining. A vibrant and intimate underground venue next to Capitol Hill’s beloved Neumos, Barboza offered the ideal space for the band to play and engage with their audience — and they did. Because of their alluring chemistry and collective on-stage presence, watching THEM perform live feels like witnessing something groundbreaking. The group’s music is also a product of community effort — all four women take part in the songwriting process and the tracks are all recorded and produced by Ellie’s boyfriend, Dustin. The two currently live together in Los Angeles where Ellie is getting her BA in entertainment business. “I go home about once a month for shows and photoshoots,” Ellie explained. “We’ve also been able to perform in L.A. Thompson and Hudson have come to visit me in the past.” THEM released their first EP, the car, in July this year, and have also released several singles like “Baby Please” and “BAD 4 U,” which charted at number five on KEXP within its first week on the radio. The band’s set list, infused with a sense of early 2000s pop-punk nostalgia, included their current discography, as well as an unreleased track and covers of “Motion Sickness” and “Kyoto” by Phoebe Bridgers. The audience sang along the entire night. “For some of the songs I couldn’t hear myself singing, which was just a crazy feeling,” bassist and vocalist Thompson told the SGN. Complete with ambient pink lighting, a handmade backdrop, and dozens

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of glow sticks in the crowd, each song performance was charged with energy from both the stage and the floor. “It was just so much support and it really put into perspective for me how much I love doing this.” All members play multiple instruments (from bass to keyboard, guitar to violin), and several of the songs gave them a chance to try out different things — after the first couple of tracks, Thompson and Hudson traded guitar and bass. “We like to mix it up to keep the energy moving on stage and not have us

standing in one spot,” Ellie explained. The women were accompanied by openers King Sheim and Cherry Ferrari, both based in Seattle as well. Ellie told the SGN that the group was previously connected to King Sheim, a punk-pop trio, through Mode Music Studios. She also reached out to Cherry Ferrari via social media. “I wanted to give younger artists the opportunity to play a show with us,” she said. Between these three bands, audience members were given a refreshing taste of Seattle’s

up-and-coming artists that left them wanting more. With an upbeat attitude and magnetic stage presence, THEM is on track to dominate music scenes in the PNW and beyond, so be sure to check them out soon. THEM has an upcoming show at Chop Suey in January 2023, and they have more dates to come. Their music is available to stream on Spotify, Apple Music, and YouTube. For more updates, find them at https://www.theband-them.com or @ theband.them on Instagram.

Photos by Georgia Skerritt

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SGN

Film

The Way of Water marks Cameron’s triumphant return to Pandora

Avatar: The Way of Water – Photo courtesy of 20th Century Studios

It’s been 13 years since James Cameron’s Avatar was first released to theaters and subsequently became the biggest box office hit of all time. There has been much discussion over the last decade-plus as to whether or not this science fiction action spectacular has left any cultural footprint or if all its thunder has been silenced by the consistent worldwide success of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. When it was announced that Cameron would be bringing not one, not two, but four sequels to theaters over the course of the next decade, Hollywood pundits, bloggers, and a large collection of critics were quick to wonder if the time for a return trip to the planet Pandora and its Na’vi inhabitants had come and gone. Audiences don’t care about Avatar anymore. No one can remember what a Na’vi is. Jake Sully isn’t a memorable hero. The interstellar Dances with Wolves meets Ferngully scenario has only grown sillier and more problematic over time. The sequels are destined to fail. There is a Hollywood industry axiom the individuals spouting all of those statements seem to have forgotten: When he’s behind the camera, never bet against James Cameron. This adage holds with Avatar: The Way of Water. Not only is this sequel a technical marvel — Cameron once again invented new technology for the express purpose of bringing mind-blowing visuals to life and to create an immersive, one-of-a-kind 3D experience unlike any that’s ever been attempted — it is also one of the single most thrilling big-budget Hollywood experiences I’ve ever witnessed. Not since George Miller’s Mad Max: Fury Road has an action-packed visual extravaganza forced me to sit up so straight in my seat. It’s stunning stuff, and I can’t wait to head back to an IMAX screen and watch the whole darn thing again. It’s not a perfect ride. Far from it. Much like Titanic and the first Avatar, Cameron’s melodramatic proclivities reminiscent of

George Cukor, David Lean, Douglas Sirk, and Vincent Sherman are on full display. Goofily cheesy bits of dialogue lead to sudden, unintended bursts of laughter, and this epic’s emotional displays are shamelessly broad. There is nothing subtle about any of this, and the personal interactions between the characters are as obvious as they are forgone. And so what? It works. Cameron and his crack story room team of Rick Jaffa, Amanda Silver, Josh Friedman, and Shane Salerno know what they are doing. They ground the characters in familiar, universally timeless archetypes. They’ve transformed Cameron’s original world into a family survival saga that’s reminiscent of authors like Johann David Wyss (Swiss Family Robinson) or Robert Louis Stevenson (Treasure Island), setting all the incredible whiz-bang in a recognizable, relatable milieu. Picking things up almost two decades after the events of the first film, The Way of Water begins with former jarhead-turnedNa’vi-chieftain Jake Sully (Sam Worthington) and his warrior wife Neytiri (Zoe Saldaña), the devoted and loving parents of four children: eldest Neteyam (Jamie Flatters), adventurous second son Lo’ak (Britain Dalton), youngest Tuk (Trinity Jo-Li Bliss), and teenage adopted daughter Kiri (Sigourney Weaver). She is the child of the deceased Dr. Grace Augustine’s Na’vi avatar, and both Jake and Neytiri have accepted her into their family with selflessly loving arms. After a quick reintroduction to the world of Pandora — which includes a few returning characters like human scientist Norm Spellman (Joel David Moore) and Neytiri’s fiercely protective mother Mo’at (CCH Pounder) — things switch into high gear with the re-arrival of the “Sky People,” human terraformers who aren’t just interested in mining the distant, Earth-like moon for unobtanium this time around. Instead, they need to make the planet inhabitable for humankind, and if that means eliminating the Na’vi then so be it. This puts Jake and Neytiri right in the center of the conflict. But unlike the first war, where the Na’vi were victorious, this time the humans have an unexpected ace

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by Sara Michelle Fetters SGN Staff Writer AVATAR: THE WAY OF WATER Theaters

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they are eager to unleash on Pandora’s Indigenous population. Even though he was killed during the final battle, Colonel Quaritch (Stephen Lang) still makes an unexpected return to duty. His DNA was utilized to create a Na’vi avatar, one that was also infused with all the soldier’s memories and skills. This “reconstituted” Colonel Quaritch and his battle-hardened unit of fellow clone hybrids have one mission: Track down and kill Jake Sully. The action quickly shifts to the island Na’vi communities of the Metkayina clan, led by Tonowari (Cliff Curtis) and his shaman wife Ronal (Kate Winslet), and it is at this point that The Way of Water becomes something special. The Sullys must learn about their new home, and that means diving into the oceanic depths and encountering forms of fantastical sea life. There is roughly an hour of the family getting an education in living on the water, and every second is nothing less than magnificent. It all builds to a final hour of action and suspense that blew me through the theater’s back wall. While storytelling elements are reminiscent of past Cameron opuses (most notably Aliens, The Abyss, and Titanic), there’s never a false beat throughout this climax. The unrelenting kinetic ferocity of this last act is undeniable, and while nothing that happened came as a surprise, my eyes still remained glued to the screen. A few words on the technical aspects. Cameron attempts to push the cinematic bar to its breaking point, and much of what he has created is lightyears beyond anything I could have hoped for or imagined. At the same time, there are segments of gonzo visual ingenuity that simply did not work for me. Most specifically, like Ang Lee and Peter Jackson before him, Cameron is trying to utilize a filmmaking tool known as “high frame rate” or HFR, and much like his fellow Oscar-winning peers, he meets with mixed success. I’m not going to get too wonky trying to explain things, as attempting to dig into the differences between the traditional frame rate of 24fps (that’s “frames per second”) and HFR (which for cinema is typically 48fps but can technically go all the way up to 120fps) would take forever. The

shorthand version is what some nickname the “soap opera effect,” which is another way of referring to the motion-smoothing common to HD televisions. It gives things a sterilized, almost artificial visual sheen that can be uncomfortably distracting but can also maximize depth and create a sense of total immersion that the traditional frame rate of 24fps cannot match. Cameron comes frustratingly close to cracking HFR, most notably during the underwater sequences. These scenes are stunning in ways I can barely verbalize. Every time a character heads into the ocean, the image comes alive like nothing I have ever experienced. Cameron, his actors, his crew, and his visual effects team have outdone themselves, and there was never a second where I did not believe this new world beneath the sea, its gigantic creatures, and its peculiar plant life existed. It’s during many of the above-water moments that the HFR is a distraction, especially during sequences featuring human characters. The soap opera effect is on full display, and I found the artificiality of the image, no matter how intimately constructed, crafted, and choreographed, to be deeply maddening. This is especially true during the film’s first hour, and any time the story shifted into a scientific laboratory or a military barracks I wanted to scream. Cameron mitigates this during the last hour by shifting frame rates throughout the massive final battle. It’s a nifty maneuver, and more often than not it works. The director tricks the human eye in ways I honestly did not think were possible, and I almost feel like if he had been able to do this earlier on, maybe the first third wouldn’t have visually annoyed me so much. No matter. None of this means a darn thing if Avatar: The Way of Water doesn’t entertain, and the sequel does that with astonishing ease. I’m not saying this return to Pandora will break box office records and become an unparalleled sensation equal to its predecessor, but it also wouldn’t shock me in the slightest if it did just that. Don’t bet against Cameron. Just don’t do it. At this point, when he’s in the director’s chair, I’m kind of starting to believe there isn’t anything he can’t accomplish.

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Episode 44: Death and Friends In our final episode of 2022, Ash & Lindsey discuss art, art theft, Brittney Griner's return to the US, and the weaponization of Queerbating. Special guests Angel Luna and Nash Flynn of podcast Death and Friends chat with Ash about their show, the comedy inherent in history's tragedies, and, yup! You guessed it. Death!

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SGN

Books

Forever Home a must-read for animal lovers by Terri Schlichenmeyer Special to the SGN FOREVER HOME: HOW WE TURNED OUR HOUSE INTO A HAVEN FOR ABANDONED, ABUSED, AND MISUNDERSTOOD DOGS—AND EACH OTHER RON DANTA, DANNY ROBERTSHAW, AND LARRY LINDNER © 2022, HarperOne $27.99 266 pages The leash is hooked tight. One end on your dog’s collar or harness, the other end firmly wrapped around your wrist, and he’s not going anywhere without you. Rescuing this pupper was the best thing ever and now, as in the new book by Ron Danta, Danny Robertshaw, and Larry Lindner, he’s forever home. It all started on horseback. Danny Robertshaw, who’d loved horses since he was small, was well-known as a rider and trainer up and down the East Coast. Ron Danta had moved his horses to South

Image courtesy of HarperOne

Carolina to a farm he’d purchased with the hope of launching a business. The two men had met but it wasn’t until their lives began

to circle closer to one another that they became good friends; not long after they’d decided to become business partners, Danta divorced his wife and had an epiphany. The two men became partners in life. It helped that both had deep and endless love for horses and dogs. When both men were boys, growing up in separate states, their mothers impressed upon them the habit of adopting stray dogs and unwanted, unloved pups. All their lives, both men had picked up side-of-the-road, mistreated, or elderly dogs, rehabilitated them, and rehomed them. It wasn’t cheap. The dogs they sheltered had various medical problems, and many had issues stemming from fear, abandonment, and abuse. Danta and Robertshaw paid for the dogs’ vet bills out of pocket, then housed and trained each pup until it could be properly adopted out as a “Danny & Ron dog.” That was a pure labor of love, but their house was soon wrecked and their furniture, shredded. At one point, with hundreds of dogs in their care, they turned their home into a “doghouse” — this, despite coping with personal health crises, hurricanes, the filming of a documentary, and

their marriage — and all in conjunction, at home and overseas, with causes and people close to their hearts. “It’s good to know that rescue — being loved, living with dignity, belonging — is happening on more than one front.” Few can resist an adorable puppy. But what about the dogs who’ve seen better days? Can you resist scooping them up? If the answer is no, then you’ll want Forever Home. In a consistently upbeat manner, authors Robertshaw, Danta, and Lindner share the story of a movement that has saved the lives of countless dogs and other animals over the years, and the two men behind it. While these stories are sure heart-capturers, they’re also very repetitious, as if the animal’s name and breed were all that changed from tale to tale. Readers will notice, too, that there are lots of happy stories here, but they’re quite often preceded by dismaying accounts of abuse and neglect. Still, that’s not news to pet lovers. Heavy sigh. Despite some confusion as to who’s telling the story, Forever Home will appeal to anyone who’s shared a bed with a dog, a sofa with a cat, or a ride with a horse. Open the cover, read a page, and you’ll be hooked tight.

Alison Cochrun queers up a 90s rom-com classic just in time for cuffing season by Lindsey Anderson SGN Staff Writer Cuffing season — when people couple up — is in full swing. The temperature is dropping, and everyone and their aunt is looking for a little romance to heat up their December. Luckily, readers with the SGN Book Club don’t have to look far for a good love story to warm those cold winter nights. This week, our book club has the pleasure of reading romance author Alison Cochrun’s latest holiday romance, Kiss Her Once For Me. Hitting the sophomore slump Kiss Her Once For Me is Cochrun’s second book, following her popular debut novel The Charm Offensive. Even though she went into writing her second novel with experience under her belt, Cochrun admits the process of writing a novel was much different the second time around. “Oh my gosh, they were vastly different experiences for me. The Charm Offensive was one of those where I didn’t have any previously published books. I was teaching high school English, I didn’t have plans to be a writer, and I ended up just having an idea and running with it. It was very much a passion project, and it went fast. After it was done, I thought about publication,” she said of her first novel. “When you’re writing a second novel, it’s the opposite. You know that you have to have a novel first and that it’s going to be sold and read by people. People are waiting for it, so it’s not necessarily something that you’re doing for yourself. You’re doing it with an audience in mind, your agent and your editor in mind. For The Charm Offensive, I wrote the first draft so fast. The first draft just poured out of me in six days. Whereas for Kiss Her Once For Me, it took ten whole months to write the first draft. It’s a pretty big contrast,” she continued. A lot had changed for Cochrun between novels as well. After struggling to balance writing with her career as a teacher, she decided to take a break from her job to focus on her latest book. “Last year I took a leave of absence from teaching. I love teaching and I did it for eleven years, so it’s very meaningful for me, but it turned out that trying to write full time and trying to teach full time was not good for my men-

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Alison Cochrun – Photo courtesy of the author

tal health. I ended up taking a break from teaching to see how it went, and it went pretty okay, so now I’m in this phase where I’m writing full time.” While You Were Sleeping reimagined Kiss Her Once For Me was a unique project for Cochrun. It was her first time writing a story featuring a sapphic romance, and it was also her first holiday book, something she had not originally planned on doing. “So, funny story, I didn’t intend to write a holiday book

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at all,” she said with a laugh. “In June of 2020, after I had sold The Charm Offensive to my agent, my agent was immediately like, ‘Okay, what’s book two? We’ve got to immediately come up with a proposal so that we can sell book two,’ and I just had no ideas. I was struggling so profoundly to come up with what I wanted to write next at that moment.” She had some ideas for the book, but with everything going on in the world at the time, it was hard for her to find inspiration. “I knew I wanted it to be sapphic, but

it was June of 2020, it was the middle of lockdown, and I had only been talking to my sister and my dog for far too long. Creativity was not at its peak.” Her inspiration for the book came from an unlikely place, but one that 90s romcom fans might recognize. “The thing that inspired me to write this book was the movie While You Were Sleeping starring Sandra Bullock and Bill Pullman, which was one of my absolute favorite rom-coms growing up. I was a really weird kid, so that was my favorite movie for a ten-yearold, and I would just make my dad watch it every single weekend because I was obsessed. I love that movie, so I was like, what if I rewrote it but made it Gay? So that was the initial concept for the book, and While You Were Sleeping is a holiday movie, it’s set at the holidays, it’s not a traditional Christmas movie, but because that was set at the holidays I was like, okay, I’m gonna write a holiday book, that’s what’s happening. That’s how I ended up writing a holiday book, so it was more of an afterthought than a set intention.” The classic 90s movie ended up providing the perfect fodder for Cochrun’s pandemic creativity gap. “While You Were Sleeping played a huge part. It’s a story about a woman who rescues a man. She has this crush on a guy from a distance, but they’ve never spoken, and then he’s attacked on the subway tracks and she rescues him and saves his life but he ends up in a coma. When she gets to the hospital with him, everyone assumes she’s his fiancée and so she ends up being his fake fiancée while he’s in this coma. His whole family adopts her and brings her in, but she ends up falling in love with his brother instead,” she explained. While the original movie centers on a heterosexual couple, Cochrun said she didn’t need to stretch her imagination far to make the story Queer. “Bill Pullman, who plays the brother she falls in love with, his character is named Jack, and in the movie, he dresses exactly like a Portland butch Lesbian, like, it is to the T. He has this floppy hair thing going on, he wears a flannel shirt and a Carhartt jacket over the top, and workboots, and it’s a whole look. He was a part of me being like, well, I could just gender bend that and make Jack a Lesbian instead, which is what I ended up doing.”

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Images courtesy of Atria

Sapphic from the start While she initially struggled to find the inspiration behind the story that would become Kiss Her Once For Me, Cochrun knew from the beginning that she wanted her novel to be Lesbian, especially after writing her first novel. “My first book was a big part of my coming out experience. Writing The Charm Offensive about male characters kind of gave me a sense of distance and protection and could kind of give me a disguise for myself so nobody would know that I was the blonde tech genius with eight-pack abs in the story. “I knew that I wanted to, with this book, write a sapphic love story. I was out to all of my family and out publicly at that time, and I wanted to write a story about two women falling in love, that was the most important thing,” she said. “That was an important thing to me, as a newly out Lesbian who had just created her Hinge profile when I started writing this, to write about two women falling in love and write about that journey.” Cochrun also knew that she wanted her book to be a rom-com. “I love the rom-com genre, 90s rom-coms, I was raised on them. They hold a very special place in my heart. Within the romance world and romance novels, I love the rom-com tropes that exist in there too, but I think one of the things that are fun for me, just kind of by the nature of being a Queer writer, is that I get to play around with those tropes in a few ways, so I get to take classic tropes and just twist them a little bit or subvert them all the way, just to make them Queer, so I can write myself into those movies and stories that I loved growing up.” One of her favorite rom-com tropes to write is forced proximity. “Just take two people and shove them together and force them to be close? I love it! I also love opposites attract, just two characters that are different and bring out different parts of each other.” Cochrun has always been a writer but never thought she’d be writing Queer romance novels. “Growing up, I always was a writer, and in my teen years I mostly tried to write YA fantasy novels, but of course back then I had no idea I was Queer. That didn’t even seem like a possibility in my life. All of those stories were straight and involved heterosexual romance subplots,” she said of her early work.

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“I know for me, writing a Queer romance for the first time felt vastly different, from a personal standpoint, about how I was able to develop those relationships, the way that I felt about exploring the identity of the characters. It felt right to me after years of something that was not true to myself and authentic,” she said. Now that Cochrun is a Queer romance writer, she’s noticed that there are a lot of expectations placed on her shoulders. “One key difference that I do know of between Queer romance and not Queer romance, in Queer romance, because we have fewer stories, there are always more expectations placed on them.” “There are eighty bajillion straight romance novels out in the world, and some of them are freaking fantastic, some of them are horrible, some of them are just middle-ground fluff. They can be all these different things, but I think with Queer romance, readers can be a lot harder on Queer romance just because they don’t have as many stories that represent themselves so they tend to expect a lot from it,” she continued. As a consumer, Cochrun is aware that she also places high expectations on Queer work. “I know for me that was how I felt watching Happiest Season a few years ago. I was like, this is it, this is the only one we have, this is our one sapphic holiday romance, it has to be perfect, it has to be all these things. Of course, it wasn’t, because Queer people are not a monolith and Queer culture is not monolithic, and I think that can be a little different. I think other marginalized authors experience the same thing. I have the experience of being a white writer and so I am not expected to represent all white people in my writing, but I know for a lot of Latinx writers and Black writers that there can be that expectation to make sure that your story reflects everyone in your community, which is just an impossibly high standard.” A fluffy hug of a book With impossibly high expectations in mind, Cochrun knows that her book won’t be for everyone, and that’s okay. “It’s a holiday romance about two women falling in love. I hope for some readers picking up this book it’s like a fluffy hug, that they can

drink their hot cocoa by the fire and they can kind of, for a brief period, allow themselves to escape from whatever hardships are happening in their life and just escape into this zany story,” she said. “I also think on a deeper level, for myself, a huge part of writing Queer romance is an act of self-love and self-affirmation, and I of course always hope that people walk away from my books believing truly that they are deserving of love in whatever form they want it and need it,” she continued. While Kiss Her Once For Me is a love story, Cochrun also hopes it can be interpreted as a self-love story. “This book specifically deals with the concept of failure. The main character is crippled by her fear of failure because she is twenty-five and she has been fired from her dream job, so her whole life plan has fallen apart and she’s so afraid to put herself back out there after this perceived failure. So I hope this book provides some comfort in regard to that fear of failure and allows readers to question what failure is and how we define it and also to consider that some things are worth that risk. In life, some things are worth the risk of falling on your face. Some things are worth the risk of having something not work out, and so that is kind of a key takeaway within the book.” Celebrating the holidays with Alison Cochrun The holiday season is a time for love of all kinds, and Kiss Her Once For Me is a reminder to show love to all those close to you, even yourself. One of the ways Cochurn expresses love this time of year is through cherished holiday traditions. “I love all holiday traditions because I think for me what I love most about Christmas is the anticipation. It’s all the little things that you do in the lead-up to Christmas that I find special,” she said. “One of my favorite traditions growing up was just driving around looking at Christmas lights. We used to do that as a family and have our little hot cocoa, so I just love doing that, driving around looking at lights.” Of course, Kiss Her Once For Me wouldn’t be a holiday book without including some traditions as well. “One of the tra-

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ditions in the book, the family, when they put ornaments on the tree, they bring out all the ornaments, and every time they bring it out they have to reminisce about where they got the ornament, where they traveled and got it from, or was it an ugly elementary school ornament that you made, whatever the story behind the ornament is. That’s something that my family does. When we would decorate the tree together, it’s a very slow process but every ornament has a lot of sentimental value, and we would always talk about it. It means we don’t have a nice tree aesthetic, it’s just a lot of random shit, but it’s such a special experience,” she said with a smile. Cochrun also has a special Christmas gift for all her fans. “My third book has been announced. My third book is called Here We Go Again. It’s a sapphic road trip rom-com. I pitched it to my agent as my sapphic road-trip rom-com about death, which I know sounds grim and sad but it’s a book that is super-near and dear to my heart and I love it very much and I am excited to share it with people,” she said. She plans to continue writing Queer romances in the future and said she can’t imagine writing anything else. While her next book will be coming out next year, Cochrun has another, more personal romance project she’ll be working on in the meantime: in just a few weeks, she will be getting married. “Is being U-Hauling Lesbians a trope? We’re that, we’re getting married in three weeks, that’s coming up real soon, so I’ve got a wedding to plan,” she said with a laugh. “In romance novels, there’s often a trope in like male/ female pairings where the man is really big and strong and the woman is tiny and dainty, and my partner and I are like that, but we’re both women. I’m 5’11” and very much a broad, full-sized person, and then my partner is like five feet tall. And she is like teeny-tiny, and so we look very mismatched.” Fans will no doubt be awaiting Cochrun’s latest novel in 2023, but she will also be taking some much-needed time off to enjoy married life with her new partner and their parrot.

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C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Op-Ed

How to know when you’re smoking too much weed

by Isabel Mata SGN Staff Writer Ask Izzy is a biweekly advice column about relationships, mental health, and sexuality. Written by Isabel Mata — a Seattle-based lifestyle writer, podcast host, and mental health advocate — Ask Izzy offers tangible expert advice so all readers can have stronger relationships, better sex, and healthier mindsets. Looking for some more guidance? Submit your question at info@ sgn.org with the subject line Ask Izzy Submission.

Dear Izzy, When are you considered a stoner? Is it problematic if it’s most evenings, but you’re super productive during the day and get everything done that you need to? — Fazed and Confused Dear Fazed, If you are questioning whether you smoke too much weed, then you probably already know the answer. Take a week off and see how you feel. As someone who smokes weed every day, I usually take breaks when I feel my tolerance getting too high. If I’m finishing an entire bowl or joint on my own and still don’t feel anything, then that’s my cue to cool it. If you are using cannabis to relieve stress, deal with chronic pain, or just hang out socially, and it’s not impacting your life negatively, then I personally think you are fine. If you are otherwise generally healthy, drink enough water, and exercise regularly, then light it up. It’s when you find yourself reaching for the good stuff to disassociate or cope with difficult emotions that it might be time to pause and reflect. But the world is literally on fire. What do you expect me to do? While the world is definitely on fire, “there’s no need to focus on just one substance or activity to find joy,” says SGN’s editor and fearless leader A.V Eichenbaum. “If they’re worried, it’s time to branch out. Not, like heroin or anything, but you get it.” I personally get really into cocktail-making every time I take a break from smoking weed. But a doctor or health care professional would definitely disagree with this behavior. Of course, if you are really concerned for your health, please stop reading this and seek medical attention immediately. Despite what pop culture may tell you, there is nothing inherently wrong with being a stoner. Just look at Seth Rogan! He writes movies, creates beautiful pottery, and runs a booming weed business. All while smoking weed. A true high-functioning stoner and a personal idol. If someone is trying to make you feel bad for being a proud stoner, then, respectfully, fuck that person. Weed is a personal choice and while it is still highly stigmatized around the country, that doesn’t make it bad. Only you know the answer that you seek. Trust your gut If your body is telling you that it’s time to try sobriety and reconnect with yourself, then listen to it. What maybe was a fun activity in the early days of the pandemic might not be serving you as well anymore. And that’s okay! We go through lifestyle phases and that doesn’t mean you have to go without weed forever..

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Photo by Pavel Danilyuk / Pexels

After some time away from your drug of choice, you can reintroduce it back into your life in an intentional way. One example might be setting limits on when you

smoke or take edibles, like only doing it on the weekends. With the new year only a few weeks away, now is the perfect time to set goals for yourself.

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Helpful tip: write down this intention in a place you’ll see it every day!

SGN

National News

Masks off: Log Cabin Republicans join armed right-wing crowd harassing drag show by Mike Andrew SGN Staff Writer Members of the San Antonio chapter of Log Cabin Republicans (LCR) joined an armed right-wing crowd trying to shut down a drag event on December 13. LCR claims to be the LGBTQ Republican Party affiliate, asserting that they are “moderate” in contrast to the anti-LGBTQ views in the rest of the Republican Party. Conservative Republican groups have largely distanced themselves from LCR, excluding them from party events. According to both NPR and the San Antonio Report, LCR members have now aligned themselves with extreme rightwing anti-LGBTQ forces. Both news sources identified LCR as a participant in the unsuccessful effort to shut down a drag show on December 13. The show, titled A Drag Queen Christmas, was billed as an all-ages event. Reportedly, the show features at least one reference to alcohol, but it does not include any nudity or sexually explicit acts, according to promotional material and videos of previous performances posted online. Performers sing, lip-sync, and dance on extravagant sets wearing lavish costumes — “not unlike other drag shows that have taken place in San Antonio and other cities for decades,” San Antonio Report noted. Nevertheless, some 40 protesters gathered across the street from the theater in downtown San Antonio. Some were armed – although NPR reports that the armed protestors were “fewer than five.” According to reports, many were from the Texas Freedom Force, which the FBI identified as “an extremist militia group” after the January 6 insurrection at the US Capitol. Police occupied the street between the protestors and the theater. Some of the protesters shouted “pedophile!” and “groomer!” at a crowd of counter-protesters and at attendees who had lined up to go inside the theater. They were answered by shouts from the other side: “The groomers are in your churches!”

National news highlights by Daniel Lindsley SGN Staff Writer Gender-fluid official fired after luggage theft allegations Without elaborating further, the Department of Energy has announced that it has fired the country’s first openly gender-fluid senior government official, Sam Brinton, after the longtime LGBTQ advocate was accused of two separate instances of luggage theft. “By law, the Department of Energy cannot comment further on personal matters,” a department spokesperson told NBC News in an email. Brinton themself did not immediately return a request for comment. According to an arrest warrant from the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department, one alleged theft took place in July at Las Vegas’s Harry Reid International Airport. And in October, Brinton was placed on leave after an investigation into allegations

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Armed counterprotesters said they came out to defend the rights and safety of the LGBTQ community Tuesday night – Photo by Bria Woods / San Antonio Report

A small group of armed people dressed in black also stood on the pro-LGBTQ side of the street wearing rainbow scarfs tied to their tactical vests. While they declined to speak to reporters, one confirmed that they were members of the John Brown Gun Club, a left-wing gun rights group. According to reports, crowds on both sides remained mostly calm, although police did step in to stop minor disturbances. Some members on the pro-LGBTQ community side of the street helped with crowd control, keeping people from spilling into the street. Many passing cars honked and some

waved signs in support of the LGBTQ community. Some passengers flipped off protesters. Police eventually closed off an adjoining street as the pro-LGBTQ group swelled in size and a small fraction of them attempted to cross the street to the side occupied by the right-wing groups. Kimiya Factory, president of the advocacy group Black Freedom Factory, stepped in alongside police to calm the crowd and move it back toward the sidewalk. “Please stay on this side of the street, I’m begging you,” Factory told the crowd. As of 10:00 p.m., there were no arrests

made related to the protests and the combined crowds on the street had dwindled to under 60 people. City Councilman Jalen McKee-Rodriguez and Councilwoman Teri Castillo turned up to support the pro-LGBTQ group. Earlier in the day, McKee-Rodriguez, the first openly Gay Black man to win a City Council seat, told the San Antonio Report that counter-protesters should “focus on [what we] hope to say in a protest — and it’s that we are equally as deserving to be in this space as anybody else. And you can’t intimidate us away from that.”

that they stole luggage from the baggage claim at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport a month earlier. The estimated value of the latter bag and its contents is over $2,000, well over the $750 needed for a felony charge, meaning Brinton could face five years in prison, a $10,000 fine, or both, according to a complaint filed with Minnesota’s 4th Judicial District Court. Brinton has been the target of transphobic attacks from media and Republican politicians since October. Publications have referred to them as a “drag queen” and misgendered them, while on Wednesday last week, 16 House Republicans sent a letter to the department demanding Brinton’s resignation. Consumers, employees favor pro-LGBTQ companies, survey says In partnership with public relations company Edelman, the LGBTQ advocacy group GLAAD has released an analysis of survey data from 1,000 consumers and 1,000 workers in the country. The results suggest that a slight majority of both groups (51%) said they were more likely to work for a pro-LGBTQ business, while only 11% said they were less likely. In addition, more than half of Americans expect CEOs to help shape policy around LGBTQ rights, according to the analysis. This is despite Edelman’s corporate clients’ reported anxieties about alienating transphobes by taking a firm public stance with

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The Louis Vuitton flagship store, decorated for Pride in 2020 – Photo by Anthony Behar Sipa USA via AP

the LGBTQ community — especially on the eve of a potential recession. Another survey found that 61% of a group of 200 advertisers wanted to support the LGBTQ community but were hesitant for fear that the backlash for getting representation wrong would be worse than no representation at all.

GLAAD President and CEO Sarah Kate Ellis recognized that some of these conditions could tempt companies to sideline or cut support of social causes. “But if you put the LGBTQ community on hold, it will affect your bottom line,” she said. “It’s just the numbers. It’s too important to consumers and employees.”

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Photo by Patrick Semansky / AP

MARRIAGE

continued from cover “This law and the love it defends strike a blow against hate in all its forms,” said Biden of the Gay marriage legislation. “And that’s why it matters to every single American.” The law is the first to protect both same-sex and interracial marriages to be passed at the federal level. It also repeals the Defense of Marriage Act, passed in 1996, which defined marriage as being between a man and a woman. Celebration The HRC called the Respect for Marriage Act’s passing the “biggest legislative win in the fight for LGBTQ+ equality in over a decade” in a press release Tuesday. “It should be lost on no one that this bill signing comes less than a month after a deadly attack on our community in Colorado Springs, and at a time when the community continues to face ongoing threats of online and offline violence, as well as legislative attacks on our rights,” said HRC President Kelley Robinson, who attended Tuesday’s ceremony with her wife and daughter. “In signing this bill, President Biden has shown that LGBTQ+ peoples’ lives and love are valid and supported.” The press release also noted that HRC mobilized “242 major businesses with over 8.5 million employees, a grassroots army of more than 3 million members, supporters and volunteers, and the nation’s 62 million ‘Equality Voters’” in support of the Respect for Marriage Act. The owner of Club Q and victims of the November 19 tragedy were also in attendance at the ceremony. Here in the Emerald City, organizations of all stripes expressed their support for Biden’s action on the bipartisan bill. “[We join] our LGBTQIA+ community in breathing a collective sigh of relief that our families cannot be broken and must be treated as equal with today’s signing of The Respect for Marriage Act into law,” Seattle Pride said in a statement to the SGN. “This victory is symbolic of the support and protection LGBTQIA+ families deserve, and it

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Photo by Andrew Harnik / AP

serves as motivation to continue our pursuit of equal human rights for all.” “Today’s signing of The Respect for Marriage Act into law is a victory for LGBTQ+ families, and for everyone who has fought so hard for marriage equality,” said the Seattle Men’s Chorus in a press release. “As the Seattle Men’s Chorus returns for another season of holiday concerts, our voices will be even more joyful, for now we can say with pride and certainty, Love Wins!”

Backlash Despite a Gallup poll stating that 71% of Americans support same-sex marriage, conservatives across the country still openly oppose it, including 169 Republicans in the House and 36 in the Senate when it came to voting on the Respect for Marriage Act. Many lawmakers opposed to the bill cite “religious and personal freedom” as their main concern. No Independents or Democrats voted against the bill before it was sent to Biden for approval. Despite this victory for the LGBTQ+

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community at large, conservative politicians across the US continue to act against Transgender and gender non-conforming Americans, a fact that Biden pointed out in his speech Tuesday. The president accosted what he called “callous, cynical laws introduced in the states targeting Transgender children…” “Racism, antisemitism, homophobia, transphobia, they’re all connected,” said Biden to the crowd of thousands gathered in DC. “But the antidote to hate is love.”

SGN

National/International News

Photo by Eric Gay / AP

TEXAS

continued from cover “We won’t need DL/ID numbers at first but may need to have them later if we are required to manually look up documents.” The Post says the records it obtained do not indicate why the Paxton sought the driver’s license information. After more than 16,000 such instances were identified, DPS officials determined that a manual search would be needed to determine the reason for the changes, DPS spokesman Travis Considine told the Post in response to questions.

International news highlights

“A verbal request was received,” he wrote in an email. “Ultimately, our team advised the AG’s office the data requested neither exists nor could be accurately produced. Thus, no data of any kind was provided.” Asked who in Paxton’s office had requested the records, he replied, “I cannot say.” Advocates for Transgender Texans say Paxton could use the data to further restrict their right to transition, calling the effort to secretly obtain personal information on already vulnerable, marginalized people chilling. “This is another brick building toward targeting these individuals,” said Ian Pittman,

by Daniel Lindsley SGN Staff Writer

“This is an extremely strong message,” Daniel Ksiazek, Katarzyna N.’s lawyer, told Reuters. “The court clearly indicated that the prosecutor’s appeal ignored the question of respect for LGBT people.” A lawyer at Ordo Iuris said the organization would seek a written explanation of the decision before deciding whether to appeal. IKEA responded on its website that it wanted “to create a diverse and inclusive workplace” where “everyone feels welcome, accepted and respected.”

Krakow ally evades religious discrimination charges Three years of legal debate in the Polish court system have found Katarzyna N., an IKEA manager, not guilty of religious discrimination after she fired an employee for posting anti-LGBTQ comments on an internal work forum. The prosecution, which pushed the case from a lower court, was none other than Ordo Iuris, an ultra-conservative, Catholic legal organization and think tank that falls well in line with the ruling Law and Justice Party’s anti-LGBTQ, anti-abortion, and pro-“tradition” values. Had they succeeded, the defendant could have been sentenced to up to two years in prison.

Islamic school a Trans oasis in Indonesia One might expect Yogyakarta’s Transfriendly Al-Fatah Islamic school to be a recent anomaly in Indonesia, which has more Muslim citizens than any other country. In truth, the school has been around for 14 years, ever since its founding by Shinta Ratri, a Trans woman. Ratri earned a bachelor’s degree in biology before dedicating her efforts to helping other Trans women study Islam. The student body has grown from 20 people to 60 since then, and many of them are middle-aged. “Like a rainbow, if there are red, yellow, green colors combined, it becomes more beautiful, rather than only black and white,” said student Y.S. Al Buchory, age 55.

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an Austin attorney who represents Texas parents of transgender children investigated by the state. “They’ve already targeted children and parents. The next step would be targeting adults. And what better way than seeing what adults had had their sex changed on their driver’s licenses?” A Texas state law that went into effect in January forbids gender affirming medical treatment for minors and considers parents who seek such treatment for their children to be guilty of child abuse. While courts have blocked prosecution of parents, gender affirming care remains unavailable to minors.

Alexis Salkeld Garcia of Austin, a Trans woman who changed the gender listed on her driver’s license from male to female a year and a half ago, told the Texas Tribune that the attorney general’s office inquiry made her feel “terrified.” “It’s very specifically targeted, and the one person I don’t want knowing about my gender status is Ken Paxton,” she said. “I don’t want a cop pulling me over and knowing I’m trans. That is why I changed my gender marker extremely quickly” after transitioning, she said. She added that she worried state officials might change her gender marker back to “male.”

Trans women and activists in prayer at Al-Fatah Islamic School – Photo by Dita Alangkara / AP

“We must be able to respect each other, tolerate, not interfere with each other.” Indonesia is relatively tolerant compared to other Muslim nations, given the many LGBTQ groups allowed to operate openly. Just one province, Aceh, explicitly criminalizes same-sex relations. Two men were pub-

licly caned there last year for having sex. There are broader problems brewing in the government. Indonesian Vice President and Muslim cleric Mar’ruf Amin entreated Muslim teachers in a speech to “ban LGBT,” calling the behavior “deviant.”

C E L E B R AT I N G 4 8 Y E A R S!

Happy Holidays!

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