Oct 5th, 2020
Vol. 4
BELFIELD BANTER THE
Th e S t . An ne’s -B el fi el d S choo l S tud en t New s l etter
In This Issue:
CONNECTING WITH OUR BOOMER DADS, A GUIDE FACTS OVER FEELINGS, A POEM BY GARDINER SPENCER
you in excruciating detail! The easiest way to approach this is through the European Theater, but if you’re feeling ambitious and culture-deprived, Rami Malek starred in a reasonably accessible miniseries about the war in the Pacific helpfully entitled, “The Pacific” (2010).
HOW TO CONNECT WITH YOUR FATHER WITHOUT REALLY TRYING: A GUIDE TO BOOMER DADS
2. Jam out to some dad rock. I will not go so far as to write that all dads have the same taste in music, but I will say that if a song has appeared in the soundtrack of something written by Aaron Sorkin, your dad’s probably pretty into it. This includes the discography of Dire Straits, Don Henley, James Taylor, Buffalo Springfield, and more. If you have a guitar, learning “Bad Moon Rising” is super easy, very on-season, and will absolutely knock your dad’s socks off. Why talk with him about politics, when instead you could drive to Lowe’s together while listening to “Baba O’Riley,”? Sure, he’ll talk about the speaker quality the entire way there, but you’re well on your way to discussing more profound topics like, “What happened to Mark Hamill?”
by Ellie Powell -Amid coronavirus concerns, students are spending more time than ever with their families. Whether you are part of our virtual cohort or our in-person community, many of us have become closer to our parents during the global pandemic. But beyond proximity, how do we truly get to know our family members through these extraordinary circumstances? We have been given an unprecedented opportunity to improve and deepen our familial relationships, but I have found that this may be easier said than done. Here, I have included three easy tips on how to connect with your father today. ––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– – 1. Learn a single fact about World War II. In the immortal words of comedian John Mulaney, “All of our dads are cramming for some World War II quiz show, and I can’t wait to watch it.” Indeed, most fathers I know have at least two D-Day related books on their bedside tables, and while reading these in full may accomplish very little, your father will beam with pride if you ask him once about how many U-boats were really destroyed in combat. Buckle up, folks, your dad is about to explain mid-twentieth-century German maritime law to
3. Watch M*A*S*H. If there’s one thing I know about your dad, it’s that he likes M*A*S*H and you know what? He’s actually onto something with this one. Obviously, I must preface my statement by saying that watching the first three seasons of M*A*S*H is a futile pursuit for most socially conscious high school students, but seasons four through eleven are infinitely watchable. What’s stopping you? Go into your living room, find the M*A*S*H DVD set that your father bought in the 90s, and strategically time it so that your dad walks in while Alan Alda’s speaking. I can almost guarantee you that he will say, “Oh, M*A*S*H? I watched that when I was your age. That Alan Alda’s really something,” and voila--you’ve trapped him. Look on as he sits down next to you on the couch and chuckles along with the vaguely progressive humor of white, seventies television. This is truly the prophesied gateway to speaking with him about your hopes, fears, dreams, friend group drama, and relationships.
ENOLA HOLMES: A NETFLIX REDUX OF A MYSTERY CLASSIC STAB CROSS COUNTRY: FALL UPDATE FACULTY FEATURE: MS. MUHA GETTING TO KNOW THE BANTER STAFF
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