‘This is manifesting for real people with busy lives.’
– Louise Pentland
‘Fran is the queen of relatability and manifesting. She has a way of cutting through the noise and explaining manifesting with absolute clarity and warmth. She makes the law of attraction feel achievable, even in the chaos of motherhood. I’ve loved her work for years – and this book is a total game changer for busy mums like us.’
– Ferne McCann
‘Francesca is nothing short of simply inspirational! The epitome of somebody who knows what she wants and goes and gets it regardless of the hurdles in the way. A must-read for anybody who just wants to fill their own life with positivity and hope.’
– Anna Williamson
‘Manifest Like a Mother is your no-BS guide to calling in everything you want – while raising kids, raising your standards and remembering who the hell you are. It’s soulful, practical and wildly empowering. Run don’t walk, and learn from Francesca Amber!’
– Susie Moore
‘Manifesting changed Francesca’s life. In Manifest Like a Mother she shows us how to give our own lives a glow up. Inspiring and charismatic, this book contains so many practical tips to build the life you want.’
– Paul Brunson
‘Francesca is the “mother” of manifesting. She offers practical wisdom, authenticity and a fierce feminine energy that awakens the power to unlock your destiny.’
– Rochelle Fox
How to Attract the Life You Want in the Time You Have
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For my daughters, Bohemia, Riva and Laveau.
For my own mother, Cassandra.
And for every mother deciding to consciously create a beautiful life for themselves and their children.
WELCOME, BITCHES
‘Hi, I’m Francesca and I’m a powerful manifestor. And, guess what? So are you.’
When I first pitched this book to my publishers, they responded with, ‘Why manifesting for mothers? What a goddamn niche. What makes us different and why can’t we manifest and create a life of our dreams like anybody else?’ Well, you only need to be a mother for a single day to know that we modern mothers are the most time- and energy-poor demographic in our society by a mile!
I have completely transformed my life in the last few years using the law of attraction and all kinds of strategies, which you’ll find in the pages of this book. Now, I know that lots of people have used manifestation to change their lives, but the difference for me was that I did it from the depths of the trenches of motherhood. And not just motherhood, but single, Covid- 19- lockdown, no- income, isolated- and- alone, gave- birth- to- twins and suffering- from- postnatal- depression motherhood. But more on that later.
About four years ago, when I started hosting my selfdevelopment book club, I remember picking up a popular manifesting book all about creating a powerful morning routine with great excitement and anticipation that this was going to change my life. I had experimented with waking up super early in the past – riding high on the coat- tails of
transatlantic jet lag or during a stint of good sleeping habits or sobriety – and I was excited to try it again as I knew what amazing results it could garner. As I turned the pages and read that I would be required to wake up at around 5am and have the first hour of the day to myself to meditate, journal, read and exercise, I quickly realised with frustration that this was no longer going to work for me and the newborn motherhood stage of life I was in at the time.
My life back then was broken up into two-hourly cycles that ran twenty-four hours a day. Those two-hourly cycles were me breastfeeding for about twenty minutes, followed by being naptrapped, then changing nappies, only for it to start again. Oh, and looking after my four-year-old too (or was she looking after me?).
So many self-development books have been written by wellmeaning men who seem to have very little to do with the daily raising of their children. The chances of me getting to meditate while my school-age daughter tries to tell me all about her dreams from the night before were slim to none.
A short while later, I was recording a podcast with a wonderful manifesting coach and I asked her what the secret to her success was: what did she do every day by way of rituals that ensured she was on the right track to success and abundance? She informed me that her daily manifesting rituals had changed and reduced dramatically since she got a dog. A dog! As I sat there with a baby on each boob and a four-yearold raiding the kitchen cupboards in the background, I could scarcely believe my ears. That’s when it hit me square in the tits: here I am as a woman in the deepest, darkest trenches of motherhood, trying to create my dream life using a template that people with far more time, space and energy for themselves had created. It was never going to work. Or, in the words of 50 Cent, I could ‘die trying’.
Yes, Molly- Mae was right when she said we all have the same twenty-four hours in the day, but a day without six wakeup calls in the night, round- the- clock breastfeeding, school runs, toddler groups, laundry and making dinner every single day has a hell of a lot more time, space and energy in it for you to focus on your goals and dreams.
That podcast, that episode and that conversation was a transformative moment for me. I realised what my calling was: to make all this incredible work that I know can change people’s lives possible for mothers like me.
I experienced a total life breakdown (or what I’ve since rebranded as a breakthrough) in 2020 with a simultaneous move across the country, a relationship break- up, the loss of my business and income, the loss of freedom (hello lockdown!) and the discovery that I was pregnant . . with twins! I found myself going from being a happy- go- lucky single mum living in London, taking rooftop breakfasts around the pool with my eldest daughter at Shoreditch House, relishing my childfree time in the big city with friends, treating Tinder like it was Amazon same-day delivery for men and working on my salon empire, to being isolated for months on end with only my toddler for company.
We lived in a cramped, outdated house which an old lady had recently died in (RIP, but her taste in brown carpets which I couldn’t afford to replace was hideous ) in a quiet countryside village where I hardly knew anybody. My business was closed for the foreseeable and my income as a self-employed queen was gone. My twin pregnancy weighed heavily on me as I struggled with depression, to be blamed equally on hormones and my new circumstances. As all that I knew and loved about my life fell away at an alarming rate, one thing remained and always will: the ability at any point to remember that I am
a powerful creator; that I can take control, change my mindset and manifest the life I want to live. I guess there’s no better place to start than at the bottom, standing among the wreckage of my previous life.
I started my law of attraction podcast initially as something to do after one ‘isolation creation’ too many, painting my entire kitchen pink! The podcast gave me a focus and served to distract me from the living hell of eternal lockdown in quarantine. It soon became a lifeline, something that not only saved me but enabled me to thrive, creating a far better life for myself than I ever thought possible.
The good news is this: I did it! I took the tatters of my life and created something incredible using my mindset alone. I did it. I did it with tiny newborn twins and a toddler in tow. I did it on my own. I did it with no money. I did it with no partner to help. I did it with no coaches or courses or retreats – and so can you!
As I sit here and write this, reflecting back on what my life was like then, I can scarcely recognise it from the life I live today. Yes, I have manifested more money than I could have ever dreamed of earning and all the trappings that a basic bitch like me would want: family trips to Barbados, a dream house with big gates, a Pinterest-perfect kitchen and a designer vagina, but it’s so much more than the material stuff. I now have an exciting, fulfilling career as a podcaster and now author (hey!) and a life filled with beautiful people, stimulating friendships, fun events, adventures, travel and love. It genuinely feels as good as it looks.
I know that you are picking up this book hoping there is finally a way to dedicate some time to creating the life you want. This is despite all the commitments and responsibilities that take away so much of your energy. And yes, in a way, being a mother and all the ways that society is not set up for us
to thrive makes it harder, I admit that – but, in another sense, it makes it so much easier too.
Ask any mother what their priority is in life and almost every single one will say, ‘My children’. Well, the great news is that by taking the time and energy to work on yourself, on your mindset, on your goals and creating the life of your dreams, not only are you doing it for you, but you are also doing it for your children. We all know what it’s like to parent with an empty cup. When we’re tired, burnt out, haven’t socialised, haven’t rested, haven’t had a change of scenery – when we lose ourselves and our direction, abandon our passions, neglect our relationships and fail in our self-care efforts – we become a shell of our former selves. The scary thing is that it happens slowly . it happens insidiously. It begins the second you give birth and all the care and attention on you and your well-being is immediately transferred to your new, tiny human. It begins when we are expected to relentlessly put our babies before ourselves from now until the day we die. It begins when we absorb the invisible load. It’s become so normal to take care of everyone else’s needs before our own that it’s an almost alien concept to ask ourselves, ‘Am I living the life that I want?’, ‘What do I truly desire?’ and ‘What are my goals?’
The best gift you can give to your family is a healthy, healed, happy version of you. I wrote that line and deleted it three times, because although this is important and true, I don’t want you to do this just for your children. I want you to do this for YOU.
This book is about manifestation but it’s also about strategy. Because it’s all well and good knowing what to do, but if you’re too damn tired or overwhelmed to do it . . well, that’s no good.
This is important because in this season of your life, you are going to be busier than at any other time. You are going to have more expectations and more responsibilities placed on
you by your family, friends, work and society than ever before. If you aren’t careful, there will be no time, space or energy left for you to cook up what you truly want, and nothing tastes worse than regret. That is why strategy is so important. You want to run your home, your family and your business, but also leave space for you.
If this is feeling uncomfortable or selfish, know this: we often talk about giving our children all the things we didn’t have in our own childhood, but why when we say this do we mean material items – maybe the must-have designer shoes of the season or the gaming console that everyone has? When you work on your own personal development, build love and trust with yourself to create a life of your dreams, you give your children so much more. You give them the gifts of witnessing you upholding standards and boundaries, enjoying emotional regulation, living with healthy habits and modelling beautiful relationships. What more could you possibly want to give them?
This book is unlike any other manifesting book you’ve read. I’m not going to tell you to meditate each day and journal when you wake up because, frankly, what mum has time for that? Instead, this book will explore different ways you can incorporate manifesting into your everyday life – hacking your way to more energy using your menstrual cycle, allowing your home to be your ally in reaching your goals, turning your endless list of jobs into self-care rituals, dressing for the life you want, and so much more. I promise, it’s not going to add to your plate, but simply rearrange it to make space for the life you want to create.
Before we dive into manifesting like the magnetic, multitasking, miracle-making mothers we are, let’s start at the beginning. I’m going to kick things off with the basic theory of the law of attraction – not because I think you’ve never heard of it (I’m
assuming you’re as obsessed as me), but because even us seasoned manifesting veterans sometimes need reminding. The basics are called the basics for a reason – they’re the foundation. And if your foundation’s feeling a bit wobbly under the weight of school runs, laundry mountains and forgotten PE kits, then it’s time to dust it off and realign. Let’s go back to where the magic starts.
Chapter 1
THE LAW OF ATTRACTION
‘The law of attraction at a very basic bitch level is a bit like ordering from Amazon, except Amazon is the Universe.’
I first discovered the law of attraction in my early twenties. I found it the way any mid- noughties girl did and that was through the iconic book The Secret. I was introduced to it by my friend Grace. I turned the pages in disbelief, faster and faster like that boy in The NeverEnding Story . I read every single word, slammed the book shut and declared, ‘This is going to change my life!’ And, spoiler alert, it did.
The law of attraction at a very basic bitch level is a bit like ordering from Amazon, except Amazon is the Universe. You can order whatever you want from the Universe at any time; whether it’s a physical item, an amount of money, an experience, an outcome to a situation, a person or a feeling – anything! Here’s the scary part: it’s working all – the – time, whether you like it or not!
I know that manifesting has its sceptics, naysayers and outright disbelievers – and I can understand why. Those who have spent their lives in struggle will absolutely resist the idea that they can create their own reality. However, there are so many forces or real, physical things that we are unable to sense, but they’re there regardless and we have no problem in believing in them. Think about the invisible force of gravity
which is holding us down, how a dog can hear a pitch of a whistle that is undetectable to our ears or how Wi-Fi is all around us, connecting us to each other. We can’t see these invisible forces, but they are there nonetheless, just like the invisible energies that surround us.
Time and time again, it’s been proven that everything, yes everything, is simply energy which is vibrating at different frequencies and, when frequencies match, they tune in and connect, much like a radio.
Actually, let’s think of a radio. It works by tuning in to specific frequencies of electromagnetic waves. Radio stations broadcast their music or shows on different frequencies. When you turn the dial on a radio, you’re selecting a specific frequency and, once the radio is tuned to that station’s frequency, you can hear it clearly. If you’re not on the exact frequency, all you get is static.
The law of attraction works in a similar way, but instead of a radio, you are the ‘receiver’. Your thoughts, emotions and energy emit their own ‘frequency’. When you focus on positive thoughts, gratitude and the life you desire, you tune yourself to the frequency of those things, like tuning into a radio station.
When you’re aligned with that frequency, you start to ‘receive’ similar energy in return – opportunities, ideas and situations that match what you’re broadcasting. If you’re focused on worry or negativity, it’s like being off the station’s frequency – you won’t get the results you want.
The fact is, most people spend their lives thinking more about what they don’t want than what they do. A very simple rule is to give attention to what you want to manifest into your reality. Each time you catch yourself dwelling on what you don’t want, refocus and give your energy to what you do want.
We Don’t Attract What We Want, We Attract What We Are
The core principle of the law of attraction is that like attracts like. Basically, whatever energy you’re putting out there, you’re going to attract right back to you.
Now, this is where rookies will say, ‘OK, I want to win the lottery and go on a date with Eddie Hearn.’ (Is that just my weird crush? OK.) Then they are surprised when it doesn’t manifest. Why doesn’t it work? Well, it’s not as simple as order it and it arrives. In order to receive what we desire, we must first believe we are truly able to receive it and also become the kind of person who would receive it. That’s where so much of ‘the work’ comes in. We must begin the task of working on our past traumas and the resulting limiting beliefs that are holding us back. I will give you an example from the one long manifestation experiment that is my life.
I grew up with a mum, dad and older sister. My dad was fun at times and had lots of great qualities, but he was quite an intense person who made many choices I would never repeat with my own children. When I was around 11, my parents got divorced and Dad moved out, and I felt a lightness I‘d never experienced before. My mum, my sister and I got so much closer, I was finally allowed a hamster (win!) and my mum suddenly had a big circle of single mum friends – life felt like a party. This lasted a year or two until my mum met her new partner, aka exactly the same as my dad but with a different face. He was often aggressive, bigoted and angry. I moved out as soon as I could to the bright lights and safety of London, which I loved and which gave me the safety and security I craved.
As an adult, almost twenty years later, I sit here as a single woman with three daughters, living alone, financially
independent, emotionally hyper- independent and reluctant to date. I have managed to manifest so many incredible things in my life including wealth, success, amazing friendships, exciting experiences and so much more – but still I’m single. Why? Because the role men have played in the story of my life has been such a strong narrative that ‘men are bad’ and ‘women thrive on their own’ that it takes A LOT to work through that. Is it impossible? No. Is it my priority? Also no. I’ve been too busy being a boss bitch, making a number-one podcast, raising my daughters, writing a book and living my best life!
I’m not mad at myself that I haven’t taken the time and energy to fully work on my love-limiting beliefs, rather I’m proud of myself for recognising how my narrative is shaping my life. Yes, we totally can change any and every aspect of our lives, but it truly does take some intentional time and energy to resolve. Time this mama just hasn’t had . . . yet!
When it comes down to it, we don’t simply attract what we want, we attract what we are. That’s where so many different techniques and strategies, such as cyclical living, visualisation, gratitude, emotional freedom technique (EFT), dressing for the life you want, aligned action and setting your environment up for success, come in to elevate your standards, ways of living and habits until you become what you are aiming to magnetise into your life. We’re going to explore these techniques, which I’ve specifically curated for those in their motherhood era, a little further into the book. One promise I want to reiterate here is that this isn’t going to be just another manifesting book telling you to journal and meditate each morning. I don’t know how your motherhood’s going and what your mornings look like, but if they’re anything like mine, we don’t have the time for that!
Now, before you go thinking this is all just ‘positive vibes’ with no backbone, there’s actually some fascinating science
