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Rutgers Entertainment Weekly www.rutgersmedium.com
Volume XLII Issue I
SEPTEMBER 14TH, 2011
MARKETING
U EXTENDS BRANDING RIGHTS TO ALL CAMPUS BUILDINGS BY THE KILLA WHALE FEATURES EDITOR
COLLEGE AVE—Rutgers University has found an efficient, new way to generate income by selling the titles of their buildings to various corporations. The idea was founded earlier this summer when the university entered into a partnership with High Point Solutions, an Internet hardware supplier. The deal sold the rights to the title of Rutgers’ football stadium for $650,000 annually. As Rutgers Athletic Director Tim Pernetti said, “It’s a great way to make money for the footb-I—mean, I mean school.” This sale is not the only one to have occurred in recent months. University officials noted last week that several other buildings on the College Avenue Campus have been “boughtout” and will be renamed. It was leaked that Scott Hall was purchased by Mazda Mo-
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tor Corporation and will be renamed Mazda Hall: What Do You Drive? The change has bewildered and confused students across campus. Kendall Leeson, SAS Senior, said “I had been trying to figure out what ‘MHWDYD’ on my schedule stood for…hmm, well,
"I plan on using the money I saved to pay for Dental Assistant training, and for tissues to stop the crying."
150k pounds of
never would’ve guessed it was swag given out at Scott Hall!” In addition, construction has Involvement Fair already begun on the exterior The statistic includes the part of Au Bon Pain which had RUPA member dressed as a giits title bought by Starbucks and ant foam finger who was miswill be renamed Starbucks. Furtakenly taken as a souvenir by a Continued on Page 2 freshman and brought to Busch.
NEWS IN PICTURES
SOOTHING BUS ANNOUNCEMENTS McCormick taken hostage until LULL STUDENTS TO SLEEP ON REXB demands for candid photo are met BY SUM DUM JOO NEWS EDITOR
ROUTE 18—While student have been praising the University’s new buses from First Transit, there have been a few reported missteps in the progress of successfully implementing the new program into the University. Last Friday, according to a statement from the Department of Transportation, several students were found sleeping on a bus for more than five hours. Early speculation reveals that the students on the bus, thought to be a REXB en route to Douglass, had requested that the volume on the on-board announcements be lowered due to low capacity on the bus. “Those things get loud,” said Rafael Forte, a SAS Senior. But after lowering the volume to a lower volume the bus driver, Don Rapnit of Hamilton, noticed some concerning behaviors. “After the volume was turned down, the pre-recorded
voice became really soft and comforting. The kids kept falling asleep,” said Rapnit. “I didn’t know what to do. I’ve only been here a week, they haven’t trained us on sleeping students!” The students were equally surprised. “I was on my way to class and then the next thing I know it's nine at night and there’s a bunch of biddies standing around me on their way to some skanky party on Suydam,” said Michael Christophers, a MGSA junior. “Apparently the girls thought I was gay because I was sucking my thumb as I slept and they invited me along so they could bitch about their parents! It was hell!” Transportation services is working to correct the problem, either by having Bobcat Goldthwait re-record all the announcements or spiking all the drinks Despite his unwrinkled tie and neatly combed hair, the University President in the dining halls with caffeine. had spent the previous three hours hog tied in the trunk of a Buick.
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