This paper may not be suitable for persons under 18.
Rutgers Entertainment Weekly www.themediumonline.com
Volume xli Issue x
NEWS QUICKIES
Student abroad finds himself with aid of map BY DR. DREHOOD STAFF WRITER
AMSTERDAM—While many students choose to go abroad for cultural learning, some also take time off during the semester to do some soul searching. While studying abroad in Amsterdam, MGSA Junior Brian Tomchyk recently came to an epiphany after days of travel, where, just outside a coffee shop, Tomchyk picked up a map and noticed that he had found himself. "It was mind-blowing, the map said I'm here, and here I am! It was crazy!?" he said by phone last week. When a passersby handed him another map, Tomchyk was overjoyed. "It says I'm here, when the other one says I'm over there? I can be in two places at once!? This is some crazy zen shit they don't teach you back at Rutgers."
Young man finds fuzzy beaver on Douglass Campus ...notes that it got a lot of wood.
INDEX
DOW +.59% NASDAQ +.78% NASCAR 200 mph! When stocks crash, it's bad. When race cars crash, it's COOL!
Balance your portfolio with stock car racing
november 10th, 2010
50¢
PRE-GAMING
MEN'S BASKETBALL TEAM ENDS SEASON IN ADVANCE
BY TORGO VAN PELT STAFF WRITER
THE RAC—In a brief press conference on Monday, new men’s basketball coach Mike Rice announced that the season would not begin as planned this Friday night at Princeton. Instead, the season will not take place as scheduled and will be completely forfeited, giving year one of the Rice-Era a perfect record of 0-31. This was a complete turnaround from the offseason where Rice was coaching with fire and gusto, and bursting with enthusiasm. However, at the press conference he was down and melancholy about the Knights’ chances over the forthcoming months. “Let’s face it, we’re doomed,” he sulked, “We have only nine scholarships on the roster. We only could get engineering students as walk-ons. On top of that, we’ve got injuries, injuries, injuries, with Graham out for
DON'T LET IT STOP YOU FROM BUYING SEASON TICKETS! the year with an ACL tear and Dane Miller recovering from partial spontaneous combustion.” Rice added, “Next year’s class promises to be so, so good, so why should we slog through this year in the first place? I’m so convicted in our avoidance of this year that I’m ready to invent a time machine and move forward one year. Anyone have
some elbow macaroni?” No refunds will be offered to people who have already made ticket purchases. To appease the masses though, an alternate slate of events will replace the basketball games on the RAC. These events will include tricycle racing, open mic nights, and a combination pancake breakBASKETBALL continues on pg. 2
LEARNING FOR (HIS) PLEASURE
New MRS degree broadly appeals to broads BY LI'L BIT STAFF WRITER
COLLEGE AVE—The School of Communication and Information announced over the weekend that they will be adding a new major to their list of degree options. In addition to majoring in Journalism & Media Studies, Communication, and I.T.I, SC&I students can now choose to major in Media Related Studies. Administrators believe that the M.R.S degree will appeal to a large percentage of the University’s undergraduates. “This program is an excellent option specifically for our female students interested in getting ‘wifed up’” said SC&I administrator John Doe. “Now instead of just focusing on real journalistic pursuits, young women can pursue a degree more specific to their true
Not surprisingly, all the single courses are already taken
aspirations.” Focusing on domestic media relations, the major will re-
Let's not talk about this weekend... ESTABLISHED 1970
quire such core classes as Intro to Sandwich Making, Just Taking It in the Workplace, and Parking 101. Like their classmates majoring in Communication, those pursuing an M.R.S degree will need only 30 credits to graduate, 10 of which can be acquired through Byrne Seminars and First Year Interest Groups. Despite the program being in its first year, applications from interested students have already begun pouring in. “When I got to Rutgers, I knew I wanted to do PR for celebrities or write for Cosmo, so naturally Comm. was the major for me,” explained SC&I Sophomore Jane Doe. “But now, with the M.R.S degree, I realized that my real strengths lie in making babies and looking pretty; I can work at home and still benefit society.”