Unified Newspaper Group April 2021 Young at Heart 9
Elders who live alone need extra attention Senior Living BY STEPHEN RUDOLPH hen my mother-in-law was still with us, she lived next door, but she lived alone. We had built a duplex home so my in-laws could live next to us and age in place while we were nearby to assist. We made efforts not to intrude on their lives, and we would even call them before we went over to see them. After her husband passed, we were concerned about keeping tabs on her physical safety and emotional health. My wife is a registered nurse, so she could help her mom with her diabetes, her nutrition and other ailments. She also made certain her mom saw her physician on a regular basis. However, not all elders live close to their children, and sometimes they go without any help from their neighbors or friends. Thats an unsafe situation, both physically and mentally, so if you know someone who lives alone, please help that person by giving him or her your time. According to the Pew Research Center (pewresearch.org), U.S. adults ages 60 and older also are more likely than their counterparts around the world to live as a couple without young children at home. Almost half of Americans in this age group (46%) share a home with only one spouse or partner, compared 31% globally. Census figures suggest about 14 million seniors are aging alone. According to a post by senior care referral agency A Place For Mom, elder loneliness resulting from living alone can result in health complications, increase the rate of dementia, increasing unhealthy habits and higher instance of elder abuse. Senior isolation is both common and dangerous and while living alone doesnt inevitably lead to senior loneliness, the two often go hand-in-hand, it points out. If you are not close enough to your
elderly loved one to check in regularly, perhaps a friend or neighbor can do this or you can hire someone. Meal delivery and cleaning services might also be a good idea. A home care company in the area that specializes in home care for the elderly could assist. If your loved on requires a bed with railings and/or appliances that assist them to remain in their home you can contact a durable medical equipment (DME) company. My mother-in-law lived to age 90 and wore a necklace that would allow her to call for help if she fell. When she fell the first time, we were able to be with her within five minutes. If there is tension between you and your loved one, now is the time for forgiveness. Mathew 6:15 says But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Providing this kind of care to your loved one can feel like a burden on your shoulders. But remember that as children, your loved one did not have a very easy time caring for us. (Thats especially true for someone like me!) One way to check in regularly is starting some rituals you and your elder can enjoy together.
For example, you could enjoy a cup of coffee or breakfast with them once a week or take a car drive, pray together, read together or watch TV together. My wife and I enjoyed playing cards with her mother and her mothers husband and preparing a meal for them at least once a week. You could encourage them to do some exercise because it is good physically and emotionally. Plan to visit with them as often as you can, especially if you live nearby. Encourage your family members to visit as circumstances permit. And if your loved one has grandchildren or great-grandchildren, encourage them to visit, too. In their innocence, children secure great wonder and joy from elders because of their life experience and their wisdom that comes with age. The point is to carve out some time for them each week to do something together you both enjoy. Stephen Rudolph is a consultant for Comfort Keepers of South Central Wisconsin, a home care agency that provides skilled nursing and personal care services for aging adults, those with disabilities and others needing assistance.
Areas of Law Practice
Estate Planning / Elder Law • Probate / Guardianship Special needs (Disability) • WisPACT Trust / Real Estate Medicaid/Medicare • Family Law • VA Accredited Social Security
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Brenda R. Haskins • Julie A. Short Anne M. H. Brindley • Anna M. Dontje Amy Devine • Amanda Pirt Meyer
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