Issuu

T H E

DECEMBER 2017

O F F I C I A L

M A G A Z I N E

O F

T H E

R A M S

C L U B

S E R V I C1 E

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TAR HEELS ACTIVE IN COMMUNITY

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WELCOME

Letter from the Editor

These days, we see everything. We didn’t just see four angles of Luke Maye making the gamewinning shot against Kentucky in the 2017 NCAA Tournament regional final. We also saw— through the magic of cell phone video—Maye arriving at his 8 a.m. class the next morning, where he was greeted by a standing ovation from his classmates. By that point, he’d gone national twice over. He was a sports hero for his outstanding performance against the Wildcats. And then his commitment to his studies earned him another round in the news cycle. But it was what else happened that day—that you didn’t see—that truly demonstrated exactly what it means to be a student-athlete, and what made him such a perfect choice to write the back page column in this month’s issue. On the way home from Memphis, Maye approached Eric Montross on the team plane. The duo had bonded over their love of work with the North Carolina Children’s Hospital. “Mr. Montross,” Maye said, “do you think we could have lunch with Yash tomorrow?” Yash Krishnan is a nine-year old Tar Heel fan whom Maye had met on one of his numerous unpublicized trips to the Children’s Hospital. Maye knew how much Yash loved the Tar Heels, and on the day after the biggest shot of Maye’s life, he wanted to share his lunch break with the youngster. It wasn’t captured on video and wasn’t greeted by a standing ovation. In every way except the timing, it was just a typical day

PRODUCED BY THE RAMS CLUB EDITOR IN CHIEF ADAM LUCAS CONTRIBUTING WRITERS LEE PACE & PAT JAMES PHOTOGRAPHY JEFFREY CAMARATI & J.D. LYON, JR. DESIGN JUJUBE SPORTS PUBLISHING

for a Carolina student-athlete. We’ve grown accustomed to seeing their dunks and touchdowns and goals. But we often don’t see just how much they’re doing off the court. Participating in service activities isn’t a part of the scholarship agreement and it’s not required by any Carolina head coach. But many times, it’s a part of the Tar Heel experience that sticks with the players long after they’ve left Chapel Hill. Maybe later in life they’ll spend a weekend volunteering for Special Olympics. Maybe they’ll take their kids shopping for Christmas presents for underprivileged families. Maybe they’ll even, as Jason Brown chose to do, make service their entire post-athletics life. Last year, Carolina studentathletes devoted approximately 5,000 hours to community service. Exactly none of them were televised, but all had an impact. As Austin Proehl—one of the most prolific volunteers during his tenure in Chapel Hill—correctly put it later in this issue, it’s simply about making someone else’s day better. Tar Heel players in every sport are talented enough to make all our days a little better with their athletic exploits. The fact that they so often choose to also make a difference outside of the playing field is something we wanted to highlight in this issue. And it’s a nice reminder that even when we can see it all, we’re still not seeing it all.

ADAM LUCAS Editor in Chief ramsclub.com

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“It’s important to me to be involved in the community and try to make an impact because personally I feel so blessed to be where I am. “ —AUSTIN PROEHL

the

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edition

ON THE COVER: Jason Brown on his farm in Louisburg, where entire harvests are given to the hungry.

COVER BY J.D. LYON, JR. // OPPOSITE BY JEFFREY CAMARTI

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SERVICE

Fruits of His Labor

Jason Brown made a seamless transition from football to farming in order to achieve his dreams BY ADAM LUCAS SERVICE

18 The Right Medicine

The mini medical school program gives student-athletes a different look at leadership BY PAT JAMES SERVICE

24 Just Go Play

Student-athletes provide a welcome respite through the Single Fathers Due to Cancer group BY LEE PACE SERVICE

28 Pen Pals

Student-athletes enjoy exchanging letters with area children PHOTOS BY KORIE SAWYER

28 EDITOR’S LETTER p. 3

34 CAROLINA EVERYWEAR p. 16

TAR HEEL TICKER p. 6 SERVICE

32 From Dreamer to Donor

Rams Club member David Werry’s contributions to Carolina began as a student-athlete BY LEE PACE

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34 Behind the Scenes

Tar Heel teams find a variety of ways to get involved in the community. Almost all are unpublicized, but they consistently find a way to brighten someone’s day PHOTOS BY KORIE SAWYER AND DANA BYRNES

FIRST PERSON

38 Luke Maye: The Right Relationships

The Tar Heel junior on some of the most important relationships he has built at Carolina BY LUKE MAYE

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TA R H E E LT I C K E R TA R H E E L S I N T H E C O M M U N I T Y

SERVICE OPPORTUNITIES

Several Tar Heel teams have an outreach coordinator who facilitates that team’s involvement with the host of service opportunities available to Carolina student-athletes. This year’s coordinators include:

MORGAN GOETZ

LEAH MURRAY

LEILA EVANS

LAUREN WEISEL

BRYANNA NGUYEN

MADISON LAUFENBERG

SAMANTHA GALINA

WILL REGISTER

KYLE MURPHY

PAT LYONS

TOBY SONG

AUSTIN PROEHL

JACK ROWLETT

ERICA WIRTH

HANSEN BUTLER

MARIE MCCOOL

BROOKE BAUER

KATELYN SHIFFLETT

WILL BLUMBERG

CAITLIN BEAKES

FIELD HOCKEY

VOLLEYBALL

FOOTBALL

BASEBALL

SOFTBALL

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SOFTBALL

GYMNASTICS

FENCING

MEN’S LACROSSE

WOMEN’S LACROSSE

MEN’S TENNIS

WOMEN’S GOLF

MEN’S GOLF

SWIMMING & DIVING

ROWING

TA R H E E L S I N T H E C O M M U N I T Y

MAKING AN IMPACT

TA R H E E L S I N T H E C O M M U N I T Y

SERVICE WITH A

SMILE

Senior wide receiver Austin Proehl has been involved in numerous service activities since his arrival at Carolina. He was recently nominated for the AFCA Allstate Good Works Team.

As Senior Rower Caitlin Beakes shares, some service activities require learning by experience. We decided to make chili for dinner at the SECU House and we knew we were serving about 35 people. So we made a LOT – we bought 30 cans of beans and 20 cans of tomatoes from Walmart. Eventually we had four different pots of chili going, plus vegetarian chili. It took us an hour and half to make it and we were down to the wire – dinner was at 6:30 and it was about 6:25 and we were still trying to finish. But we got it finished just in time. We got to eat, too, and even though we all tried to eat a lot, there was still so much left over. We filled every Tupperware container and then just had to use bowls and put tin foil over the top. We were joking about filling the ladles and putting tin foil over them.

“The opportunities that God has placed in my life and the people he’s blessed me with have had a huge impact on me.

I owe it back to Him to try and make an impact in someone else’s life because you never know the impact you can have on one’s life. You could change their life forever by simply showing you care.”

– AUSTIN PROEHL, FOOTBALL

I think the issue is that we cooked as if athletes were eating, so that’s why we overestimated. People would get a little bowl and then not come back for seconds. We really had fun, and we’re going back to cook breakfast soon. We’re making breakfast casseroles, pancakes, bacon and fruit salad. There are a lot of us coming, so if we need to we’ll just eat more. (Note: Other than a plastic cutting board that melted after the wrong burner was turned on, the breakfast went off smoothly. And there were no leftovers.)

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THE

FRUITS

OF HIS

ABOR

Jason Brown made a seamless transition from football to farming in order

t o a c h i e v e h i s d re a m s

BY ADAM LUCAS

PHOTOS BY J. D. LYON, JR.

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BORN & BRED

COVER STORY

Jason Brown is on a farm, and that’s not very surprising. His mother worked tobacco and cotton for most of her childhood in Vance County. His father grew up in Yanceyville on a farm that produced sugarcane. Before Jason’s sixth grade year, the family moved to a farm on 45 acres outside of Henderson. Six and a half of those acres were grass, and his parents immediately assigned Jason the job of mowing it. During Brown’s first few days on campus at Carolina in the summer of 2001, his new Tar Heel teammates called him “J-Brown.” After getting to know him, however, they altered the nickname to something a little more befitting his down home personality: “J-Bama.” So his college and professional teammates long knew he was likely to spend some time on a farm after football. His wife, the former Tay Dickens, knew her husband was passionate about farming.

But this farm? This 1,000 acres in Louisburg? No one knew he would end up here. And no one knew that Brown would work the land from daybreak to nightfall, then get up the next day and do it all over again, just for the chance to give everything away. Brown’s family had already introduced him to farming and to the importance of helping others. It was reinforced at Carolina, where he was a regular on the football team’s voluntary Friday trips to the North Carolina Children’s Hospital. That’s when he began to internalize the importance of service. “It made such an impact on me,” Brown says. “One day, we went over there and we met a little girl who had just been in an accident with her father. Less than an hour before, they had told her that her father didn’t make it. She had just received the worst news of her life, and there we were trying to share a little bit of love and hope. We were able to give her a big hug and put a little smile on her face, and I will never forget that. “It’s little things like that that resonate

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and make you realize how human we all are and that we are all interconnected.” Another situation at Carolina reminded Brown of the importance of putting others first. In the fall of 2003, the Tar Heels visited Wisconsin and absorbed a 38-27 loss. The next day, Brown learned his older brother, Lunsford Brown, had been killed in action in Iraq. Upon hearing the news, the Tar Heel head coach, John Bunting, drives Brown back to Henderson. Bunting drives, Brown sits in the passenger seat, and Tay rides in the back seat. Bunting spends hours in Henderson that afternoon, listening to stories about Lunsford and sharing hugs and tears. Sunday is a big meeting and film day in college football. Bunting doesn’t meet or watch film. He just visits. The next week, Carolina loses to NC

State, 47-34. The next day is Lunsford’s service. Bunting brings the entire team to Henderson for the funeral. Even now, 14 years later, Brown’s eyes moisten a little when he tells the story. “They came in and they cried just as much as I did that day,” he says. “My offensive line coach, Hal Hunter, was tough as nails. He would never let you see any emotion coming from him. He cried like a baby. I soaked up all that energy. When I committed to Carolina, Coach Bunting told me, ‘Family first.’ I’ve heard those words a lot of times, and I knew there would come a test. Coach Bunting lived it. When it came to leadership of the players and teaching lessons, he was the best. At my lowest point and darkest moment, he showed me what it meant to care about other people. He is definitely one of my heroes.”

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“My family was living the American dream. But we were leaving behind all the Americans. This is the greatest country in the world, but there’s still a lot of work to be done as far as sharing love with our neighbor. In my football career, I was entertaining people. Now I wanted to make a move to serving our community.”

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Brown would go on to a long and decorated NFL career. He played four seasons for the Baltimore Ravens and then signed a mammoth five-year, $37.5 million deal with the St. Louis Rams. He played three of those five seasons before being released. At the time of his release, Brown was 28 years old. He had plenty of football left in him. Three teams were poised to make offers to secure his services; they were the exact three teams he and Tay had discussed as their dream locations. Baltimore was where he felt comfortable and had spent the first part of his NFL career. The Carolina Panthers were the closest team to his parents, and his mother was thrilled at the prospect of her son becoming a Panther. The San Francisco 49ers were close to Tay’s family in the Bay Area. Brown turned them all down. He loved football—you have to love it to devote that much time and effort and physical commitment. But it wasn’t his life. His life was just beginning. “I was living the American dream,” Brown says. “My family was living the American dream. But we were leaving behind all the Americans. This is the greatest country in the world, but there’s still a lot of work to be done as far as sharing love with our neighbor. In my football career, I was entertaining people. Now I wanted to make a move to serving our community.” Most people accomplish similar goals by devoting one day a month to picking up trash on the side of the road. Brown’s method was different.

“You have to understand that Jason is his own man,” says former Carolina assistant coach Ken Browning, whose ties with him go all the way back to when Brown was being recruited. “He doesn’t base what he does on the worldly convention. He makes his own decision on what he thinks is the right thing to do regardless of how the world views it. And he has always had a positive outlook about people. Whatever he is engaged in, he is completely and fully engaged.” Brown felt God was calling him to help hungry people. He told Tay he felt they were being called to put their house in St. Louis on the market and return to North Carolina. There were skeptics, of course. Plenty of people told Brown he could feed thousands of hungry mouths with the money he would make from playing more football. But that wouldn’t be fully engaged. Brown didn’t want to write a check. He wanted to touch the land and get his hands dirty. He wanted the satisfaction of being at the source of the solution. “God didn’t call me to finance the fight on hunger,” he says. “He called me to be there on the front lines.” Very soon, he and Tay were driving the back roads of Franklin County. This was not a shock to her. She’d known she might end up somewhere similar ever since her first real introduction to the Brown family, over Thanksgiving of 2002, when they took her coon hunting. The couple’s real estate agent showed them a tract of 1,154 acres near the Tar River. On the way to view that property, a bridge was out, meaning they had to take the long way. That’s when they passed by a storybook-quality farm, with rolling hills,

white silos and a gorgeous farm house. “Whatever we are able to find,” Jason thought to himself as they passed by, “I hope it looks like that one.” Brown was committed to his new vision, but he wasn’t impulsive. He and Tay looked at the Tar River land on three separate occasions. It was too close to a flood plain for his liking. Buying 1,000 acres of land isn’t easy. Buying the right 1,000 acres of land is even more of a challenge. The family’s real estate agent was disappointed they didn’t like the Tar River tract, but he had an idea. “I know of another place,” he told them. “It’s not for sale, but the owners might be willing to entertain an offer.” “You know,” the agent told them, “you might have even driven past it on the way here.” And that’s how Jason Brown came to establish First Fruits Farm on 1,000 acres with rolling hills, white silos and a gorgeous farm house. As he walks the land with a couple of visitors, he’s still a little in awe that the farm he first coveted through his car window now belongs to his family. It’s historic land, situated on a road named for the original owner. It had been in that family for more than 200 years, and was part of the original land grants through Lord Granville directly from the King of England. But in all that time, it’s never been used quite like this. Brown had a vision. “What you see here is about stewardship,” he says, gesturing at his land. “It’s about taking the blessings God gives us and using them as righteously as we can. That’s the covenant we made with God. We agreed

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“We’re called First Fruits. But really it’s All Fruits, because so far we’ve given it all away.”

that whatever land we were blessed with, we would name it First Fruits Farm, and we would give away the first fruits of whatever is grown on the land.” Brown started by watching YouTube farming videos. With the right mix of practical experience, guidance from his neighbors, and finding the right help, the farm is thriving. The first harvest, in 2014, yielded 120,000 pounds of sweet potatoes. In 2017, they harvested more than 250,000 pounds. During his recruitment, Brown told Browning he enjoyed agricultural work and thought he might like to attend college somewhere he could major in that field. This was bad news for the Tar Heels, of course, because other in-state schools offered a more direct path to agriculture. Browning urged the young player to see a bigger picture. “Jason, you’re going to need more than agriculture,” Browning told him. “You’re smart enough and talented enough that you’re going to need to be able to run the entire company. It might be an agriculture company, but you’re going to need to understand how the entire business works.” That pitch made sense to Brown nearly 20 years ago. And now, here he is, standing

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on his farm just after dawn. He’s managing the replacement of a boiler just behind his farmhouse. The tractor needs more starter fluid. Dozens of people help First Fruits distribute the food raised here to those who need it. “We’re called First Fruits,” Brown says. “But really it’s All Fruits, because so far we’ve given it all away.” To date, that means the farm has generated 850,000 pounds of food for the hungry. He’s speaking to a youth group later this week, and laughs when he says, “A lot of times, they look at me like I’m crazy,” when he describes his journey from the NFL to sweet potatoes. The way they see it, he was living a dream, playing in one of the world’s most popular sports leagues, making incredible money, and reaching the peak of American sports recognition. The way he sees it is a little different. Playing football gave him a platform and an opportunity. But the game was always going to be finite. This summer, Bunting and Browning visited Brown’s farm. They stayed for over an hour, telling old football stories and telling some stories that had absolutely nothing to do with football. They remembered that before his senior season, Brown wrote a

very pointed letter to the head coach. The Tar Heels had been 5-19 in the previous two seasons, and Brown wanted to make 2004 different. His letter wasn’t simply a dream. It contained concrete examples of what Brown needed to do in order to make a bowl game a reality—and, as Bunting recalls with a grin, it also contained some plainspoken advice for the coach. Brown had a dream of going to a bowl game. The letter was his way of outlining his process. And during his senior year, the Tar Heels beat Duke, beat NC State, beat Miami, and went to a bowl game. So Bunting didn’t drive away from Louisburg surprised that his former player had developed and cultivated an improbable dream and made it reality. “My takeaway from visiting Jason this summer is seeing just how much he believes in his fellow man,” Bunting says. “It’s seeing just how much he dreams of doing right by others and being a blessing on earth. He has tremendous pride, and he has lots of dreams and lots of goals. He has dreams for that entire property, and what he can do with it to help the surrounding communities. And no one should be surprised when he achieves all of those goals.”

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C A R O L I N A E V E R YWE A R Rams Club members like to wear their Carolina Blue, and they’ll wear it all over the US and the world. If you have a photo of you in your Carolina gear in front of notable landmarks in the US and abroad, send them our way to be a part of Carolina EveryWear!

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To have your photo included: -Send your photo digitally to bornandbred@ramsclub.com. -Identify everyone in your photo and the location of the photo. Here are the “Rules”: -At least one person in the photo has to be a Rams Club member. -You must be wearing Carolina gear. -You must be in front of a notable landmark (sorry, as cool as Kenan Stadium and the Smith Center are, they don’t qualify). SHOW US YOUR COLORS!

1) Bonnie & Allen Liles of Durham, NC, in Glacier National Park at Scenic Point; 2) Scott, Theo & Kelly Pryzwansky of Greensboro, NC, in New York at Arthur Ashe Stadium at the US Open; 3) Kristen Alane Floyd with Macy & John Thoms Floyd of Rocky Mount, NC, in Belize at the Xunantunich Mayan Ruins; 4) Steve & Michele White with Luke, Carolina & Ashley of Raleigh, NC, in Rome, Italy at the Colosseum; 5) Nika Reid of Raleigh, NC, in the United Kingdom; 6) Keith & Marti Strickland of Elon, NC, in San Francisco at the Golden Gate Bridge; 7) Frank & Brenda Rickman of Franklin, VA, at the Grand Canyon; 8) Ranjan Sharma of Greensboro, NC, in Herat, Afghanistan; 9) Sharon & David Brookshire of Asheville, NC, in Havana, Cuba; 10) Donovan Gibbs Ruef, grandson of David Hunt Moody & Alice Gibbs Moody of Chapel Hill, NC, in Washington, DC, at the Capitol; 11) Ginny Willey, Nancy Grace & Henry Willey of Raleigh, NC, in Positano, Italy; 12) Jim Gentry of Greensboro, NC at the State Fair in Raleigh, where he ran into Rams Club staff member Janine Holland; 13) Matt & Angela Cummings with Lindsay & Royce Cummings of Charlotte, NC, in the United Kingdom at Stonehenge; 14) Michael, Sharon & Adam Leinwand of Leland, NC, in Ireland along the Ring of Kerry at Skelligs; 15) Isabella Mae Whitaker, daughter of Justin & Erin Whitaker of High Point, NC, born a few hours after Carolina won the 2017 Basketball National Championship

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THE RIGHT MEDICINE The mini medical school program gives student-athletes a different look at leadership BY PAT JAMES // PHOTOS BY KORIE SAWYER 18

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Long before joining the North Carolina men’s basketball team as a walk-on last season, Aaron Rohlman dreamed of being a doctor. But he didn’t know what kind. Then during his junior year at Gastonia’s Hunter Huss High, Rohlman’s father, George Rohlman Jr., was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia, a type of cancer of the blood and bone marrow that affects white blood cells. “Right then, I was like, ‘That’s what I want to be. I need to be an oncologist. I can help people,’” Rohlman said. “I’m not sure if all doctors realize what their patients are going through. But I feel like that would be a good perspective to have with dealing with another patient with cancer. “My dad passed away my freshman year in January (2015). Ever since, I’ve been driven to complete that goal.” Rohlman plans on attending medical school after graduating in May 2018. But on Oct. 16, he and 21 other student-athletes attended “mini medical school” at UNC School of Medicine’s Berryhill Hall as part of Carolina INCUBATE, a Richard A. Baddour Carolina Leadership Academy program. INCUBATE, previously known as the GAP Year program and Leadership Lab, began in 2010. Formed after some coaches expressed concern about there being only three levels of programming in the Leadership Academy– Carolina CREED for freshmen, Rising Stars for sophomores and juniors, and Veteran Leaders for team captains and veteran student-athletes– the program provides further leadership development through immersive experiences. Shelley Johnson, the director of the Leadership Academy, said INCUBATE accomplishes this by adhering to the 70-20-10 Model of Leadership Development outlined by the Center for Creative Leadership (CCL).

The 70-20-10 Model suggests leaders learn from dedicating time to leadership application (70 percent), mentorship (20 percent) and instruction (10 percent). According to Johnson, CCL research showed most people flipped the amount of time spent on application and instruction. “When you apply that to our sports and our coaches,” Johnson said, “if they spent 70 percent of the time talking at their studentathletes about the sport and only 10 percent practicing … on a consistent basis, it’s really not going to move the needle as far as the student-athletes’ development. They’ve got to get out on the field, they’ve got to get on the track, jump in the pool and get work done there. “(We were) trying to find workshops that were more experiential and not just having an activity or an experiential component within a workshop. So, a lot of them do take the form now of field trips.” One such trip is to the men’s lacrosse team’s headquarters. Once there, Johnson said student-athletes participate in a “staff ride,” like those used in the military to learn from past campaigns, of the team’s 2016 national championship season. Another INCUBATE trip is to the Ackland Art Museum. Johnson said the purpose of that visit is to encourage discussion about perspective and communication – one of the key leadership skills also discussed during the mini medical school. Johnson said the mini medical school came about when UNC Hospitals contacted the student-athlete development office about becoming more involved with the athletic department. After some talks, Johnson said she and Cricket Lane, the

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associate athletic director for student-athlete development, the student-athletes. “A lot of that involves the teamwork and joined UNC head coaches and athletic administrators for one of communication skills that you guys talk about. So, a lot of these two mini medical school sessions that director of athletics Bubba things I’m going to talk to you about today, you probably have Cunningham organized in the summer of 2016. talked about in your individual activities, in your individual sports. “At that point,” Johnson said, “we were all too eager to try to set “The hope is we can draw the connection from what you guys up something for our student-athletes.” are doing on a day-to-day basis into this medical simulation So, as women’s soccer player environment.” Kate Morris, volleyball player The student-athletes then “When we did the mini medical school with the Madison Laufenberg and football applied what they learned from coaches and staff, a lot of people were observant players Zach Goins and Mason Joyner’s presentation. Veal, along with student-athletes Split into three groups, they of how the groups who perform together really from several other sports, walked participated in a team-building function at a high level. into Berryhill Hall’s Room 305 on competition with a hula hoop. A lot of that involves the teamwork and Oct. 16, it marked the beginning of Each team was instructed to lower the program’s second year. the hoop from above its heads to communication skills that you guys talk about.” The session started with a the ground quickly and evenly. But 30-minute presentation by to do so, each member could only Dr. Benny Joyner, the division chief and a clinical associate use one finger on each hand, which couldn’t hook the hoop nor professor of pediatric critical care medicine. During it, he spoke lose contact with it. of TeamSTEPPS® (Team Strategies and Tools to Enhance Communication proved key in the activity, as the winning team Performance and Patient Safety) and how vital communication is used collective counting. to being a good teammate in the healthcare setting. Following that exercise, the student-athletes divided into eight “When we did the mini medical school with the coaches and groups. They then spread out across the third floor of Berryhill staff, a lot of people were observant of how the groups who Hall and learned from UNC Hospitals employees – such as Dr. perform together really function at a high level,” Joyner told Kimberly Blasius, Dr. William Mills and Dr. Paul Shea – how to

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resuscitate someone in respiratory failure with emergency bagThe second mini medical school session of this academic year valve-mask ventilation. will be held in February. During it, Johnson said the studentIn one group, Rohlman and Goins practiced CPR on a mannequin athletes will practice more patient scenarios, like telling a family as the Bee Gees’ “Stayin’ Alive” played. They also applied some a loved one has died. of the TeamSTEPPS® communication techniques during a few “To be able to learn from medical professionals how they handle patient scenarios. those conversations,” Johnson said, “(it might) put into perspective “They have a lot more stamina conversations the studentto do chest compressions than athletes might find particularly “Their willingness to put in a full day at the hospital... we do,” joked Blasius after the challenging as leaders.” and they stay late to work with our student-athletes, student-athletes returned to But such a learning opportunity Room 305 to debrief. wouldn’t be possible without it’s incredible. I think it’s a testament to the quality of Rohlman, who is not officially Joyner and other UNC Hospitals the health professionals we have at the hospital, but part of INCUBATE, said he noticed employees. also a testament to the student-athletes and athletic a few similarities between the “Their willingness to put in a leadership skills needed on full day at the hospital or maybe department that it’s a mutual admiration society.” the basketball court and in the they had a 36-hour rotation medical field. and they’re coming off that and “On defense, coach (Roy) Williams preaches trust,” he said. they stay late to work with our student-athletes, it’s incredible,” “You’ve got to be trustworthy if you’re going to play. I trust my Johnson said. “And I think it’s a testament to the quality of the teammates. Like if I’m going to help baseline, someone is going health professionals we have at the hospital, but also a testament to have my back and have my guy covered. to the student-athletes and athletic department that it’s a mutual “I feel like it’s the same way in the medical field. You’ve got to admiration society. have trust with other doctors and nurses. You’ve got to understand “I think our doctors are as impressed with our student-athletes they know what they’re doing, too. You don’t have to put it all on as our student-athletes are with them. And the ability to do the yourself. You’ve just got to hand it off to other people sometimes.” things they do at the level that they do, it’s a real treat.”

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S e v e n W i d o w e d Fa t h e r s R ei m agi n e Life

The Group Rosenstein & Yopp

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BORN & BRED

The Group Donald L. Rosenstein Justin M. Yopp

December 2017

The Group: Seven Widowed Fathers Reimagine Life. On a mid-October evening, a group of fathers gathered around a conference table and met each other for the first time. None of the men had ever thought of himself a “support group kind of guy” and each felt entirely out of place. In fact, nothing about their lives felt normal anymore. The Group: Seven Widowed Fathers Reimagine Life chronicles the challenges and triumphs of seven men whose wives died from cancer and were left to raise their young children entirely on their own. Brought together by tragedy, the fathers— Neill, Dan, Bruce, Karl, Joe, Steve, and Russ—forged an uncommon bond. Over time, group meetings evolved into a forum for reinvention and transformed the men in unexpected ways. Through the fathers’ poignant interactions, The Group illustrates that while some wounds never fully heal, each of us has the potential to construct a new and meaningful future. Rosenstein and Yopp, co-leaders of the support group, weave together the fathers’ stories with contemporary research on grief and adaptation. The Group traces a compelling journey of healing and personal discovery that no book has ever captured before. The men’s touching efforts to care

JUST GO PLAY STUDENT-ATHLETES PROVIDE A WELCOME RESPITE THROUGH THE SINGLE FATHERS DUE TO CANCER GROUP BY LEE PACE

PHOTOS BY KORIE SAWYER

for their families, grieve for their wives, and reimagine their futures will inspire anyone who has suffered a major loss.

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A laugh, some pizza, some puzzles and board games. All simple things, but they can go a long way in the lives of children who’ve lost their mothers to cancer or any other unfortunate malady. “If we can help bring some joy for a brief moment of time, it’s worth it,” says Jarrod James, a former Tar Heel football player. “Seeing a smile on their faces is awesome,” adds Marie McCool of the Carolina women’s lacrosse team. James and McCool are two Carolina student-athletes who have volunteered their time with a men’s support group called Single Fathers Due to Cancer. The group was created in the fall of 2010 by Drs. Justin Yopp and Donald Rosenstein, members of the UNC Comprehensive Cancer Support Program at the North Carolina Cancer Hospital, to help men who have lost their wives to cancer address grief, healing and related issues. The group meets in the early

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evening hours once a month at the SECU Family House in Chapel Hill, and the Tar Heel athletes mind the men’s children for two to three hours. “It would have been un-thoughtful to have a group partly about the challenges of being a widowed parent and not offer some sort of on-site child care,” says Yopp. “We set it up to have pizza or subs for dinner and let the dads come and not have to arrange for baby-sitters. We connected with the Athletic Department about four years ago to help us with the child care. It’s worked very well because the student-athletes seem to enjoy it and they connect very well with the kids.” McCool wasn’t sure what to expect when she met the youngsters at the SECU Family

House but enjoyed spending two hours with a boy and a girl playing board games and working puzzles. “I thought, ‘What if they were quiet and shy, what would I do with them?’” says the senior midfielder. “But they were awesome, both outgoing and fun to be around. They seemed happy I was there and we had a lot of fun.” McCool is the member of the lacrosse team designated its “outreach representative” and the one who liaisons with Korie Sawyer, Carolina’s assistant director of StudentAthlete Development, on opportunities for community service. “I try to find as much time as possible for community service,” McCool says. “It’s important, not just for us but for the kids or

group we’re working with. A lot of the kids aren’t as fortunate as we are, so it’s important to step back and realize how lucky we are.” James and Brandon Fritts are two football players who have lent some time to the Single Fathers group. James was a center on the team from 2011-13 and then took a medical hardship; for two years he was a student coach, and since graduating in 2015, has been a graduate assistant coach. He entertained the children several times during the summer of 2015, and later that October, he arranged for the dads and their children to come to the Wake Forest football game and get a tour of Kenan Football Center pre-game. “It was so much fun to see the kids and their dads together at a football game,” James says. “I can’t imagine the burden they have all had to bear. But for one afternoon, they could have fun and be together at a game.” Fritts, a junior tight end, volunteered to watch the youngsters for a meeting in the spring of 2017. He’s also one of a cadre of football players who tour UNC Children’s Hospital on Fridays before home games. “It’s something I love to do, and my teammates love it, too,” Fritts says. “It’s a lot of fun. It’s beneficial for both sides. Kids have serious illnesses or problems in their families, like they’ve lost their mother. It’s eye-opening to see that.” Hansen Butler and Michael Busch from the baseball team have met with the group several times in the fall of 2017. The SECU Family House has a children’s play room with all manner of games, computers and puzzles, making it easy to find things to keep the kids occupied. “It’s a time for kids to feel a sense of normalcy, take them away from life away from having lost their mothers and be a normal kid and play around,” Butler says. “A

few times they got pretty loud, yelling and screaming and having a good time. The dads heard them and later told us it did them good to know their kids were having fun.” Having the help of the Tar Heel studentathletes has given Yopp and Rosenstein the ability to focus for two to three hours once a month with the widowers in the program. “We looked into the hallway and the kids were doing What began organically has survived seven years cartwheels and somersaults. They were having a blast. and evolved into a website It did the fathers’ hearts well to know their kids were and a book that Yopp being taken care of while they delved into some pretty and Rosenstein have co-authored. The Group: serious matters.”

Seven Widowed Fathers Reimagine Life is the story of the original seven men and how they formed an uncommon bond amid the prospects of raising children, dealing with grief and moving on in life. “In one of the early meetings, we had a group of gymnasts volunteering to watch the kids,” Yopp says. “About halfway through the meeting, we heard this thump, thump, thump noise. We looked into the hallway and the kids were doing cartwheels and somersaults. They were having a blast. It did the fathers’ hearts well to know their kids were being taken care of while they delved into some pretty serious matters.”

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Pen Pals TAR HEELS BOND WITH AREA STUDENTS

the fall of 2013, former Carolina lacrosse player Zoe Skinner created a program that allows Tar Heel student-athletes to exchange letters with area elementary school students. Four years later, the program is one of the most popular outreach opportunities on campus. PHOTOS BY KORIE SAWYER

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Isaiah Hicks, Men’s Basketball

Alexis Gannon, Track and Field 30

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Ally Hardesty, Swimming

Taylor Fricano, Volleyball

Jalek Felton, Men’s Basketball

Kenny Williams, Men’s Basketball

Courtnie Williamson , Field Hockey ramsclub.com 31

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From Dreamer To Donor BY LEE PACE // PHOTOS BY DAVID WERRY

Rams Club member David Werry’s contributions to Carolina began as a student-athlete

It was a dismal day on the football field for Carolina back on Sept. 25, 2004, the Tar Heels being soundly pounded by Louisville by a 34-0 margin. But there was a story unfolding in the stands that afternoon that has ignited into more than a dozen years of notable service by Carolina student-athletes on behalf of UNC Children’s Hospital. Tar Heel lacrosse player David Werry that day led a group of softball players in hosting about eight children being treated at UNC Children’s Hospital, along with their siblings and parents. They met pre-game at Eddie Smith Field House for pizza, games and fellowship, then walked to

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Kenan Stadium where they watched the game together. “We knew from probably 15 minutes into the first event there was something special here,” Werry remembers. “Both seeing the joy of the children and their families but also the studentathletes, being able to feel like they were giving back and doing something positive. “That first day brought us lot of happiness, went well, there was lots of energy and smiles on the kids’ faces.” And thus Carolina Dreams was launched, a program built around Tar Heel student-athletes hosting patients from UNC Children’s to a

Carolina sporting event. The first year in 200405 included about eight functions built mostly around football, men’s basketball, soccer, lacrosse or baseball games. The children over a dozen years have mostly been out-patients at UNC Children’s. “One of the most rewarding parts of the program has been learning about Children’s Hospital and seeing the commitment of the staff and physicians,” Werry says. “It’s truly amazing what they do not only for Chapel Hill but the state of North Carolina.” Werry, who played lacrosse for the Tar Heels and attended Carolina on a Morehead-

Cain Scholarship from 2002-06, had the idea for Carolina Dreams shortly after he arrived at Chapel Hill from his home in Canada. His older brother attended Carolina on a Morehead three years ahead of Dave. “Giving back was instilled in my brother and me by our parents from an early age,” he says. “I’d been involved in a variety of stuff growing up. And I came down here on a Morehead, a program that promotes giving back. It was pretty natural to want to find a way to help.” The problem, Werry soon learned, was finding the time for community service within the demands of class time, homework, writing papers and then practicing and training for a varsity sport.

“

Werry and fellow Tar Heel student-athlete Heather O’Reilly are now married and

remain actively involved with Carolina athletics.

“One of the most rewarding parts of the program has been learning about Children’s Hospital and seeing the commitment of the staff and physicians. It’s truly amazing what they do not only for Chapel Hill but the state of North Carolina.”

“A lot of my teammates and fellow studentathletes wanted to be involved, but most opportunities weren’t structured in a way that made it very easy,” he says. “Most people don’t appreciate the demands on student-athletes’ time. My idea was to create something that’s really simple and easy for the student-athlete to say yes to and get involved, as well as take advantage of something so powerful as the Children’s Hospital right next door on campus.” At the outset, Werry, the UNC Athletic Department and Children’s Hospital staff did the legwork—setting up teams and dates, inviting the patients and their families, finding support money for T-shirts and food, acquiring tickets. All it took then was for a team to agree to host the group to a game. “We did all the upfront work,” he says. “That made getting a team to sign up really easy. Even out of the gate we didn’t have any issues getting teams interested. It got easier and easier once a team had done it the first time.” Werry graduated from Chapel Hill in 2006 and today is vice president, head of consumer health products at Aetna Inc. and is married to former Tar Heel soccer standout Heather O’Reilly, who during her Carolina career lent a hand with Carolina Dreams and a number

of other outreach activities—from organizing a canned food drive, raising relief funds for Hurricane Katrina and being a part of the Share Your Holiday program. She also volunteered time at the Ronald McDonald House in Chapel Hill and with Habitat for Humanity. “Carolina Dreams is still going strong,” Dave says. “Year after year it continues to impress me, the student-athletes who take it over and keep improving it and keep it going. It’s been fun to watch from outside and be helpful where I could. At the beginning I was focused on making sure it continued. It’s not that impactful if something only lasts during few years I was there.” “David is one of the most respected studentathletes we’ve ever had and one of the most determined as well,” says former athletic director Dick Baddour. “Carolina Dreams was his idea, his vision, his concept. He went from team to team, drawing up support, outlining what their obligations would be. I am confident he was never turned down. He was that strong a leader. And what was equally important was

he put a structure in place for the program to continue after he left. He didn’t want it to be a flash in the pan. It was not about him. He wanted it to stand the test of time.” Living in Chapel Hill allows Dave and Heather to remain close to their former programs, Carolina athletics and the Rams Club. “We both owe lot of gratitude to the University, specifically the Athletic Department, for the experiences we had,” he says. “One of joys we have of living here is being so close and being able to give back and be a part of it.”

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BEHIND THE SCENES

TAR HEEL TEAMS FIND A VARIETY OF WAYS TO GET INVOLVED IN THE COMMUNITY. ALMOST ALL ARE UNPUBLICIZED, BUT THEY CONSISTENTLY FIND A WAY TO BRIGHTEN SOMEONE’S DAY. PHOTOS BY KORIE SAWYER AND DANA BYRNES 34

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CHILDREN’S HOSPITAL VISITS

Carolina football’s Friday visits to the North Carolina Children’s Hospital have been a team tradition for decades. On the Friday before home games, a group of players assembles to visit the kids, share a few laughs, and bring a little cheer to what can be a difficult situation.

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SHARE YOUR HOLIDAYS

Almost every Tar Heel team participates in the Share Your Holidays program. Student-athletes are given wish lists of a family in need, and then shop for gifts for that family while trying to stay within a prescribed budget. Many teams hold wrapping parties for the gifts they’ve purchased, which are then given to the families in time for Christmas morning.

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FIRST PERSON

“The right relationships”

The life of a student-athlete at the University of North

exponentially.

Carolina is special. The opportunity to get a great education

There are many demands as a student-athlete, but I would

and represent the university on the basketball court is

not be the person I am today without people like Yash in my

enjoyed the relationships I have built with my teammates,

for me to visit the hospital. As a junior now, I try to make it

unbelievable. Throughout my time at North Carolina, I have

life. I cannot thank Eric enough for opening the opportunity

my classmates, and my professors.

to the hospital several times a month because I know the

However, the relationships that have mattered the most

impact it has on me as well as the young kids. It is a blessing

to me have been the kids I have grown

to care about at the UNC Children’s

Hospital. I have many time commitments

and I pride myself on getting extra time in the gym and achieving well in the classroom, but I can always make time to see young kids who smile every time I walk through the door.

I began to visit the Children’s Hospital

with Eric Montross at the beginning

of my sophomore year and we talked

to be able to utilize my platform and touch the lives of many kids who are

“

“After the Kentucky game, I had a lot of people texting me and calling me, but I knew Yash watched the game and I couldn’t think of a better way to spend my first day back then to go to lunch with him and his mom.”

about how every time we leave, we have

driven to overcome adversity. Just last week, I ran

into Yash’s mom at the hospital and she was telling me

Yash and how

he was doing

a lot better. It made

that warm feeling that all kids provide to us. People may say

better than any accolade

it just as much as them. I came from a large family with four

know

the kids feel great when we come in, but we definitely enjoy

brothers and when I came to college, I wanted to be around younger kids and grow relationships with them because it

reminded me of home. No one will ever replace my three

brothers, but the young kids at the hospital have been such a blessing to me.

I have one young kid who has a special place in my heart

because of his passion and understanding for the game of

basketball. His name is Yash and I grew really close to him

who

that

had

someone

struggled

for so long had finally

turned the corner and he

cares about how I am doing. Time is

valuable, but when you know the things

that matter to you, it makes balancing that time so much easier.

to hear his story and see his fight and determination with a smile on his face each time I walked in made me excited.

After the Kentucky game, I had a lot of people texting me

and calling me, but I knew Yash watched the game and I

couldn’t think of a better way to spend my first day back then to go to lunch with him and his mom. He inspired

me so much during the season and our relationship grew

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December 2017

feel

or accomplishment to

and his family. I met him on my first visit to the hospital and

about

LUKE MAYE

Junior, Men’s Basketball

CAROLINA INSIDER PODCAST HOSTED BY JONES ANGELL AND ADAM LUCAS

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BORN & BRED

December 2017