Rolla Presbyterian Manor
JUNE 2019
Payne family memories are made in the great outdoors
Jim Payne with daughters Ashley Day, left, Andrea Otto, right, and grandson Grayson Otto. While Father’s Day may include gifting dad with a new tie, tools, bacon of the month club membership or hand-drawn picture, it’s also about spending time together and making memories. “My children make every Father’s Day special. Sometimes we have a cookout, and sometimes we go out to eat. The thing that makes it special for me is being able to spend the day with the children and grandchildren,” said Jim Payne, environmental services director at Rolla Presbyterian Manor. Spending the day with Jim is just as special to his six children and 15 grandchildren. “We usually spend each Father’s Day hanging out at his house on the farm and will either barbeque or have a fish fry. My dad will then take the grandkids on a four-wheeler ride around the farm and check on the cows and horses. We just have a great time spending the day outdoors,” said Ashley Day, Jim’s daughter. Creating memories outdoors together is something that’s been in the family for decades. -Payne, continued on page 3
Preparation Matters
by Allen Teal, chaplain A wise youth makes hay while the sun shines, but what a shame to see a lad who sleeps away his hour of opportunity. (Proverbs 10:5, The Living Bible). June marks the beginning of summer. I have always viewed summer as the season of strength. Out of the deadness of winter emerges the tentative steps of spring. By the middle of June, nature has hit its stride. Trees, flowers, birds and wildlife have achieved full bloom and activity. While winter seems a part of the distant future, it is marching toward us on the heels of the harvest. This makes summer the time of preparation. The middle of life is a time to work. Life is frequently broken up into periods that correspond to the seasons. Youth is spring. Midlife is summer. Senior years are fall. The elderly live at the edge of winter. Generally, the years from the late twenties through the mid-fifties are considered the time to establish families, careers and wealth. Bodies and minds are strong. Ambition, determination and willingness to take risks are high. People can accomplish more in less time. Winter requires planning. Ants fill their underground stores. Bears prepare for hibernation. Birds fly south. Plants load their roots with nutrients. All of nature -Preparation, continued on page 4
Rolla Presbyterian Manor | A PMMA COMMUNITY
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Fathers’ Day
By Keith McCarthy, son of resident Tom McCarthy
We celebrate Father’s Day to honor the unique role and niche of fatherhood. My father, Tom McCarthy, and I have an opportunity to enjoy, reflect and celebrate his example of fatherhood that he established for our family for nearly 60 years. My dad’s father passed away when my dad was 18 years old. At this point, my father partnered with his mother to raise his three siblings — two sisters and one brother. Effectively, he became the patriarch of his family. My father would protect and provide for his brother and sisters. And it wasn’t too long after his father’s death that my dad was starting a family of his own. He fulfilled his role of fatherhood with the standards he learned in Boy Scouts (trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly) and the virtues he learned from his mother and his religious pursuits.
Tom McCarthy with Tim, the oldest of the five children. of nurturing the unique qualities in each of his five individual children. His actions spoke to the importance of maintaining relationships in a multigenerational family. In my father’s house, service to community and family was an expectation. As a grandfather of 16 grandchildren, my father witnessed a tight knit family that would get together in its entirety multiple times a year. He witnessed a family web of close bonds and friendships. Today, my father and I share a journey. Both of us are in the second half of our lives. We take daily trips from Rolla Presbyterian Manor to rural Phelps County, Mo. My father passed down his love for the great outdoors, and we note the daily changes in the nature that surrounds us. We drive past fields and forests. We visit lakes, streams and rivers.
My dad understood his impact upon the lives around him. He was always a source of support. He would give counsel if asked. He On these outings we talk about would give help if requested. He business, family dynamics, politics was quick with positive affirmations and religion. We share war stories and slow to judge. about our career experiences and He understood the importance sometimes do a little bragging. And
From left, Tom McCarthy’s wife Carol (deceased), Tom and daughter-in-law Karen. no matter what, we get a nap in every afternoon! We both see ourselves as being among the very fortunate. My father has visits with friends and family on a daily basis. We have come to appreciate the services provided, but most importantly, the personalities of Rolla Presbyterian Manor. My father and I are on a shared journey, and we have learned to thoroughly enjoy the ride! At least one of my four siblings visit Dad every week. We don’t really celebrate Father’s Day, but we all make a big effort to come and see him. The Waltons look dysfunctional compared to us. My wife, Lisa, and I have a standing invite every Monday night with her family and mine. It’s a rural thing. Her mother makes dinner and invites others. Dad remembers those trips. ◆
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ROLLA Presbyterian Manor
573-364-7336 ◆ Fax: 573-364-7495 1200 Homelife Plaza Rolla, MO 65401-2595 RollaPresbyterianManor.org
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COMMUNITY MATTERS | June 2019
Community Matters
is published monthly for residents and friends of Rolla Presbyterian Manor by Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America, Inc., a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) organizaton.
To submit or suggest articles: lfreeland@PMMA.org Ann Caudill, executive director Joelle Freeland, marketing director
OUR MISSION: To provide quality senior services guided by Christian values.
-Payne, continued from page 1
“My dad passed away over 30 years ago, but to this day I can still hear his voice and remember the times we had together,” Jim said. “I come from a large and close family. I have 10 brothers and sisters, and dad worked very hard to make sure we had what we needed. Dad was an avid outdoorsman. I remember him being up before daylight and working all day taking care of the livestock, garden, etc. The thing that he enjoyed the most was his coonhounds. I remember many cold winter nights spent with him in the woods listening to his hounds run.” Jim’s daughter, Andrea Otto, shared a special memory with her dad that took place outdoors, too. “The most special memory I have with my dad was when I shot my first deer. He had built a deer stand that stood about 30 feet in the air. It was like a little house up there. We went out early one morning and climbed up there. I then fell asleep (like I usually did). He woke me up when he saw the deer was about 150 yards away. He helped me steady my gun because I was so nervous. I took my shot and the deer jumped straight up and took off. Dad told me that was a good sign. I was breathing so hard and Right: Jim Payne and his daughter Ashley Day.
was so excited. We climbed down and went looking for it. It didn’t take long to find it. We were both so excited!” Aside from their love of the great outdoors, Jim and his daughters share a number of similarities. “I am just a duplicate of my dad in female form. I look just like him, and we have the same personality. We are pretty laid back but if a serious problem arises, we get after solving it. I couldn’t be prouder to take after my dad in so many ways,” said Andrea. Ashley shares Jim’s personality, too. “I get my blue eyes from my dad, and we are very similar in personality. We both tend to be more on the quiet side but aren’t afraid to speak up if a problem arises. We also share an enjoyment of a lot of the same hobbies, and my love for the country and outdoors I all owe to him,” said Ashley. “My dad is hands down the best dad, and I feel so blessed to have him as my dad! Anytime any of his family needs something, he is willing to help out anyway he can,” Ashley continued. “He has fixed my vehicles more times than I can count, he spent many hours helping my husband and I build our house, and he has been patient with me
“I am just a duplicate of my dad in female form,” said Andrea Otto, pictured here with her dad, Jim Payne. growing up in the deer stand and teaching me how to drive. He loves his family more than anything and will do anything for all of us.” Andrea feels the same way. “I think I hit the jackpot when it comes to my dad. I’m convinced there’s really nothing he can’t fix. Car problems, house problems, life problems, etc. He always has a fix! He is there for us no matter the occasion or circumstance. And he’s doing the same for his grandkids!” Being there for his family— watching them grow up—has been what Jim’s enjoyed most about being a dad. “They say that you grow up to be like your parents, and I believe there is a lot of truth to that. Shortly after I graduated high school, I was following my own hounds through the woods at night. Now I have a farm with cattle, horses and a garden. I picked up a lot of positive traits from my dad, and I hope I have passed those on to my own children. I am very proud of each and every one of them. I enjoyed watching them play sports as children and grow into educated, responsible adults who are now raising and coaching their own children,” said Jim. ◆
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1200 Homelife Plaza Rolla, MO 65401-2595 RETURN SERVICE REQUESTED
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-Preparation, continued from page 1
seems to understand the need to capitalize on the opportunities of summer. Getting ready for winter requires an early start and a late finish. As long as the strength of summer holds, preparation continues.
asking for problems down the road. This is the time to pause and reflect about what we want tomorrow to
be. Follow this with action to put your life on the right track to reach your desired goals. ◆
Procrastination and laziness become our enemies. Proverbs 24:33-34 says, “A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest and poverty will come on you like a thief and scarcity like an armed man.” Whether preparing for the winter of this life or for eternity, today is the time to get ready. Tomorrow, next week and next year are barreling toward us. Delaying material or spiritual readiness is
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COMMUNITY MATTERS | June 2019
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Presbyterian Manors Of Mid-America