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TABLE OF CONTENTS VOLUME 46 NUMBER 4 JULY 2022

From The Editor

OFM Breaking

• PrideFest 2022 Allows Police Officers to March After Last Year’s Ban • Gun Violence in America: a Continious Concern

OFM Health

OFM Features

Gallery

• Lynda Carter is Wonderfully ‘Human and

Divine’ • Spooky, Kooky, and Rad as Hell: Asa Queen

OFM Thoughts • Ask a Coach

• Superhero Magick • Beyond the Binary

• Are Bottoming Pills Worth it?

• Kinky? Geeky? An Intersection • Best and Worst Places to be LGBTQ • A Fandom Tail: The Furry Community Unites Freedom with Fantasy • Creating Queer Space Online • A Beauty of Cosplay: SayoNay

OFM Culture

• Queer Girl Q&A

OFM Style • Beauty Beat

• Recycle Redux

OFM Reviews

OFM Music

• Cannabis Reviews

• July's New Must-Catch Music • Metal Meltdown

OFM Astrology

OFM Lust

• July Horoscopes

• The Mighty Kinky Helmet

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FROM THE EDITOR

Kinky and Geeky

For many years, we’ve brought you the kinky. We’ve done NSFW, sex-positive issues with steamy covers and content. And we’ve brought you nerd-positive content, covering comic conventions, queer superheros, and sci-fi. Now, we bring the two worlds together in one explosive issue! In these pages, you will learn how the worlds of kinky and geeky combine, as well as the stories of some of our favorite geeky kink creators. You’ll also discover some new, favorite artists and dive headfirst into beloved kinks and fandoms. So as the weather keeps heating up, take a cue from our photoshoot: Find a creative way to cool off but still support your favorite nerdy pleasures. And whatever you do, believe that you are fabulous; brilliant; and king, queen, or sovereign of your own universe. -Addison Herron-Wheeler

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Denver PrideFest Allows Police Officers to March After Last Year’s Ban By Ray Manzari

ack in person after a two-year hiatus due to coronavirus, Denver’s 2022 PrideFest has welcomed back all of the LGBTQ community, including those in law enforcement.

A new group called “Pride on Duty Colorado,” consisting of LGBTQ police officers and first responders, marched in this year’s parade. Last year, law enforcement agencies were banned from participating in PrideFest. Representatives from the Center on Colfax, the organization behind PrideFest, said the ban was to stand in solidarity against "police violence aimed at the Black community." The Center CEO, Rex Fuller, told OFM in 2021 that it was a challenging decision to make, though they ultimately looked at the events surrounding the death of Elijah McClain and subsequent investigations of local police departments in making the decision. “Looking at the history of the Pride movement, which started with protests against law enforcement harassment of the community, and looking at the history of The Center, which very much has its roots in objecting to police harassment of a community—That tipped the scales and made the decision, especially this year,” Fuller said.

2022 “We have to acknowledge the real pain that people have experienced,” Fuller says. He also acknowledges the officers who “endured great personal risk” to be out and open because they believe they could help make the community better. “One officer told me that they felt as if they had to come out twice; once as a member of the LGBTQ community, but then also having to come out as a member of law enforcement to their own community—and they experienced rejection in both work and community,” Fuller says. Beyond queer law enforcement participation, permit requirement to close streets on the parade route necessitates The Center to involve police officers. “We have done our best to listen to concerns of the community and to try to create a safe space that acknowledges the pain experienced by some in our community and recognizes our history, but also try to be as inclusive as we can,” Fuller concludes.

After last year’s ban, The Center received mixed reactions: While some praised the decision, others, including LGBTQ police officers, felt blocked out of their own community. At the time, an Aurora police sergeant wrote an open letter asking the organizers of Denver PrideFest to reconsider the decision to exclude law enforcement. Fuller says he acknowledges everyone will not be pleased with The Center's new course. Despite differing opinions, Fuller says he hopes community members can rally around the inclusion of everyone in the LGBTQ community. In an email to OFM, Fuller says that The Center has worked to facilitate community conversations around law enforcement involvement over the past year. Community members shared their experiences of fear and distrust with the police. Fuller recognizes the pattern of racially biased policing state Attorney General Phil Weiser found in Aurora, as well as the Denver Office of Independent Monitor’s investigation into DPD and the George Floyd protests. outfrontmagazine.com 9

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Gun Violence in America A Continuous Concern By Ray Manzari

ccording to the Gun Violence Archive, there have been a total of 240 mass shootings this year as of June 5. The GVA also reports that the number of children and teens (ages 0-17) killed by gun violence has reached nearly 400 in 2020; that number reached over 5,000 deaths in people under 18 years old, and so far, we’re on track to continue to see those startling numbers. The last two weeks of May proved to be some of the deadliest, with 19 mass shooting and 40 deaths due to gun violence. The two deadliest shootings were the mass shooting in Buffalo, New York on May 14, where a gunman shot and killed 10 people at a supermarket, as well as the Uvalde school shooting in Texas on May 24, which saw 21 dead and seven wounded. In the wake of all this bloodshed, some conservative self-described "gun enthusiasts" have decided that gun control should finally become a bipartisan issue. More than 250 major republican donors, including some who have contributed to Texas Governor Greg Abbott’s campaigns, have signed an open letter supporting congressional action to increase gun restrictions.

The gun control package contains a list of bills that would introduce regulation on the sale or use of firearms and associated equipment. The list of bills the House Judiciary Committee will consider under the broader “Protecting Our Kids Act” include: • • • • • • • •

The Raise the Age Act Prevent Gun Trafficking Act The Untraceable Firearms Act Ethan’s Law The Safe Guns, Safe Kids Act The Kimberly Vaughan Firearm Safety Storage Act Closing the Bump Stock Loophole Act The Keep Americans Safe Act

Experts expect the package to be blocked by republican opposition in the Senate; however, democrats have acknowledged glimmer of hope for bipartisan talks among senators, which could lead to the passing of a slimmer bill with support from both parties.

The letter endorses the creation of red flag laws, expanding background checks, and raising the age to purchase a gun to 21. It also voices support for Texas senior senator John Cornyn who was tapped to lead bipartisan negotiations in Congress over possible gun reform measures. “Most law enforcement experts believe these measures would make a difference, and recent polls of fellow conservatives suggest that there is strong support for such gun-safety measures,” the letter reads. In Washington, House democrats hope to pass several gun control bills such as the Rase the Age Act, which would raise the age of legally purchasing a firearm from 18 to 21, as well as the Keep Americans Safe Act, which would ban large capacity magazines.

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Are Bottoming Pills Worth It? by Zachari Breeding, MS, RDN, CSO, LDN, FAND

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hen talking about getting ready for a fun night of receiving anal sex, I can’t help but think of the phrase, “I don’t get ready; I stay ready.” Managing this expectation is nothing short of fantasy. To cap it off, most people don’t eat enough fiber to “stay ready.” And so, dietary supplement companies have branded specific fiber pills marketed for people who aim to bottom with little preparation or effort. But are they worth it? Do an internet search for “bottoming pills,” and all of the big brands pop up. With just a little investigation, the primary ingredient in all of these brands is soluble fiber followed by various additives. But wait, there are different kinds of fiber? The answer is yes, there are officially two types—soluble and insoluble. Think of soluble fiber like a sponge in your gut: its main job is to absorb fluid to thicken stool and regulate the speed of your bowel movements. The speed at which the food moves through your gut is important here because if food moves too slowly, too much fluid is absorbed, and you have constipation. If the food moves through your gut too quickly, you experience diarrhea. While soluble fibers help to regulate this speed, insoluble fiber helps to keep things moving. Think of insoluble fiber as a broom—It is pushing things out. Insoluble fiber (also known as prebiotic fiber) helps to keep the inside lining of your intestines clean. It goes without saying that a mixture of both is essential to optimal gut health and growth of natural gut probiotic bacteria.

In places like Colorado, where the air is dry and the elevation doesn’t help, up to a gallon of water is optimal. The other way to balance the gut is to gradually increase fiber over a period of time, which can most easily be done by eating foods that contain both soluble and insoluble fiber. With that said, bottoming pills are more expensive and more likely to cause difficult-to-manage side effects than just eating the right foods. Foods that contain soluble fiber (“sponge fiber”) include beans, potatoes without skin, carrots, avocado, applesauce, bananas, apricots, and white grains (such as jasmine rice). Foods that offer insoluble fiber (“broom fiber”) include the skin of a potato, broccoli, leafy greens (such as kale, cabbage, collard greens, and spinach), nuts, oats, quinoa, and whole wheat grains (such as brown rice). A variety of these foods should be included in copious amounts in the diet, along with a ton of water, to produce “stay ready” results. When these foods are an insignificant percentage of the cost compared to fiber pills or supplements (and taste delicious), there really is no question if bottom pills are worth it. Your gut will thank you.

While these supplements offer soluble fiber, a person can’t just take them and expect immediate results. With most people consuming about one-third of the recommended fiber intake daily (about 10 grams compared to the recommended 30 grams), the gut will not respond well when these supplements are taken as directed. When food moves that much slower without any gradual introduction of fiber, you will experience bloating, discomfort, and even constipation. One way to balance this impact is by drinking plenty of water—about 10 to 16 cups per day. The traditional recommendation of eight cups, in my clinical experience, is insufficient to keep the gut free of excess stool and debris.

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Kinky? Geeky? An Intersection by Brian A.S. Byrdsong

he definition of "geek" is just one of those things that isn’t easily explained, though everyone can identify it when it’s presented. Perhaps it’s that obsession with Star Trek; perhaps it’s knowing the entire history of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, or perhaps it’s even being the foremost knitting expert. Merriam-Webster defines geek as three different things: 1: a person often of an intellectual bent who is disliked 2: an enthusiast or expert, especially in a technological field or activity 3: a carnival performer often billed as a wild man whose act usually includes biting the head off a live chicken or snake

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While definitions one and three leave something to be desired (biting the head off a live snake??), number two might have something to it. It points to the colloquial idea that many, or dare I say most, people could be geeks. They are the people deeply interested or enthused about a specific subject. Then there is the definition of kinky. Merriam-Webster defines it as "relating to, having, or appealing to unconventional tastes, especially in sex." As a self-professed geek (about some things, and not others), I couldn’t help but to ask myself, “Is there a world in which these two things intersect? Some grandiose subculture that encompasses both things?” Enter: hentai. What is hentai, you ask? It’s a form of pornography involving animated characters engaged in … extracurricular activities. The world of hentai is filled with various subsections that I won’t get into here (seriously, so many!), but their defining point is that they’re all connected via the specific style of art most commonly associated with anime. Once you realize that, however, another question follows: Is it kinky? Is it geeky? Is it both, or is it neither? According to statistics obtained through Pornhub, hentai constitutes the second most searched term globally and has for a few years (as of 2019). So, going back to that definition of kinky, I would be inclined to say it’s not all that unconventional. I would gather, though, that it is geeky. That first definition of geek relates to an enthusiast or expert especially in a technological field or activity, though not exclusively; and if we’re using the term in the colloquial sense, where someone who is deeply interested in a certain type of content or subject (i.e. anime), hentai fits. "But Brian," you may find yourself silently screaming to the words on this page, "wouldn't that be considered a fetish?" I would say to you, not necessarily. According to Merriam-Webster (once again) a fetish is: a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc. And hentai isn’t always required for the people who like it. Now, you may be asking … Where is the queer of it all? Well, within those subsections of hentai are two categories that I would like to mention: yuri and yaoi. These words essentially translate to lesbian and gay hentai. Thinking big picture here, though: We could expand the concept of kink and geek to most things, given the definitions that are commonly used. Are you a fan of cosplay? An ... enthuasiast, if you will? Then congrats! You’re a geek! Do you like all things historical fiction? Congrats! You’re a geek! And if those things just happen to turn you on, then that fits the bill as kinky in its own way as well. What I’m getting at here is that the world of kink and the world of geek intersect more frequently than most would assume. So, let your geek flag fly, hoist your kink label to the mountaintops, and embrace the idea that everyone geeks out about something (seriously, Merriam-Webster ... geeks aren’t necessarily disliked), and realized that the worlds of kink and geek are lot closer than people think. outfrontma ga zine.com 15

Best and Worst Places To Be LGBTQ by Sarah White

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o be an LGBTQ person in any homophobic country is like residing in exile, where the surrounding social environments are profoundly heteronormative. The dwelling of exile is internal and the consequences of coming out have no one to blame except yourself. The consequences can be personal and political. A person coming out in a homophobic society may lose friends, jobs, insurance, and family. The government can get involved and imprison you, or even sentence you to death. The consequences of living authentically queer and trans are extraordinarily severe and gauche. Living in internal exile in a homophobic society is death by a thousand cuts which sever right to the bone. Living in internal shadows and smoke is like living in golden daylight, in comparison to the darker and lethal consequences of being openly queer or trans in many countries. The weight of the wrath of anti-LGBTQ and anti-trans policy comes in a blazing force in countries across the world. Spartacus, an LGBTQ magazine which publishes international gay travel indexes, released a chart in 2021 from data collected on the world’s safest to most dangerous countries for LGBTQ people. The chart includes statistics on anti-discrimination laws; LGBTQ persons allowed adoption, marriage, and civil partnership; intersex option for ID; conversion therapy legality; religious influence; HIV travel restrictions; banned “Pride," anti-LGBTQ laws; and prosecution, murder, and death sentences for LGBTQ people. outfrontmagazine.com 17

The three most treacherous and threatening countries for LGBTQ people to survive, let alone thrive, are Saudi Arabia, Somalia, and Russia. The primary source of law for Saudi Arabia, which ranked at number three, is the Islamic Sharia, derived from the Quran. Judges employ their personal interpretation of the Sharia to every case and apply the harshest punishments to those involved with or part of the LGBTQ community. LGBTQ citizens in Saudi Arabia face severe repression and gross legal challenges. Homosexuality and transness are widely seen as immoral and indecent. Those caught openly embracing their queerness or transness are promptly penalized with enormous fines and could receive public whippings and beatings, chemical castration, imprisonment up to life, or even the death penalty. Somalia takes the second slot for the worst place for the LGBTQ community. Somalia unabashedly prohibits same-gender intercourse and attraction. LGBTQ issues are never to be discussed in public, and doing so has dire consequences. Somalia also follows the guidelines of the “Sharia laws.” The slight penalty difference between Somalia and Saudi Arabia is that incarceration sentences for same-gender intercourse and attraction max out at three years. It’s not much of a relief, as Somalia’s military occupants do not shy away from executing LGBTQ citizens. The LGBTQ refugees, who escape from torture and assassination, face serious risk of the death penalty if they are to ever return to Somalia. Queer and trans citizens of Somalia live in fear in the country and survive in fear of deportation outside of the country, as death is only a whisper away. Unsurprisingly, Russia ranks number one in the worst place to be for LGBTQ people. Russia has a growing intolerance for queer and trans people, and nearly 80% of Russian citizens believe that LGBTQ people should be eliminated from society. In Russia, it's illegal to speak of LGBTQ issues in public, where violent conversion therapy is popular and police engage in unlawful detentions, beatings, and humiliation of citizens they presume to be gay or bisexual. LGBTQ citizens are prohibited to adopt; however, queer foreigners may adopt Russian children under the conditions they concede same-gender marriage is criminal and goes against traditional values. There is absolutely no human dignity in Russia for LGBTQ citizens. The grass is greener where you water it, and that is why there are countries across the world that provide justice and push for progress and protection for LGBTQ people. Portugal and Malta rank third and second the world’s best places for LGBTQ people, respectively. Each country boasts high numbers of anti-discrimination laws, legal and celebrated marriage and civil partnership, legalized LGBTQ adoption, rights for trans citizens, prominent LGBTQ marketing, and validated intersex and nonbinary gender options for citizens socially and on legal documents. Our maple leaf neighbors up north, Canada, topped the chart at number one. Canada has the highest amount of anti-discrimination laws and lowest amount of religious influence and violence against LGBTQ people globally. The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms overtly states religious freedom “is subject to such limitations as are necessary to protect public safety, order, health or morals, and the fundamental rights and freedoms of others.”

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The broad population is overwhelmingly LGBTQ-positive, and the larger cities have welcomed and commemorated LGBTQ communities. Throughout larger cities and villages such as Vancouver and Ottawa, there are prominent and active gay villages where the queer and trans community is celebrated all year, allowing its citizens and visitors to exist in peace, with unquestioned equality. Despite the remarkable progress by legalizing same-gender marriage in 2015 and passing the Equality Act in 2019 in Congress (though it remains accumulating dust in the Senate), LGBTQ Americans still suffer discrimination simply for being who they are. Ranking 31st (out of 202 total countries) on the list, America has 27 states with no explicit statewide laws to protect people from discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity in areas of employment, housing, and public accommodations. Ridiculous and outdated laws, such as queer, cis men being prohibited from donating blood within a year of penetrative sex with another cis man because of unfounded terror that HIV/AIDS could be present in their blood is still the rule of the land. America’s society and government embodies many opportunities to extend the sacred oath and promise of our country to every American, that they are equally valued human beings. Wherever there is Pride or prejudice, OFM proudly stands with the LGBTQ community all over the world and with all communities who struggle and die for basic human rights, of recognition, visibility, and protection in the pursuit of full equality under the law. outfrontma ga zine.com 19

A Fandom Tail: The Furry Community Unites Freedom with Fantasy by Michael Valentia

he concept of anthropomorphism may appear unusual to those unfamiliar with furry fandom, but look no further than Sonic the Hedgehog, Bugs Bunny, or BoJack Horseman to realize that personification of animals burrows deep within human culture. As described in the 2020 documentary film The Fandom, many of us were taught essential life lessons at a young age through stories depicting relatable and amusing interpretations of fauna. The furry fandom, or the appreciation of anthropomorphic characters, gained momentum as a social community in 1980s Southern California, when fan groups collaborated at sci-fi and comic book conventions around mutual admiration of animal-inspired art. Popularity spiked in the following decade through advancements in digital networking and costuming, transforming the niche scene into a global interest. For us “normies” (a term sometimes used to describe “normal people” outside the fandom), let’s discuss a few basics. A fursuit is an animal costume worn by a member of the furry community, which may be custom made or may showcase otherworldly features inspired by anime, sci-fi, or pop culture. Those in fursuits may wear them occasionally for events like conventions or more frequently in social settings. A fursona is the character, complete with personality traits and often a unique name, exhibited by a person in their fursuit. Not all members of the furry community wear fursuits, however, as those merely taking an interest in the fandom or displaying more minimal costuming are also welcomed. Finally, the furry community is widely composed of LGBTQ members.

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Perhaps the greatest majesty of furry fandom is that a fursona provides many wearers a freedom to express uninhibited or previously uncovered aspects of their personality. “A fursuit definitely pushes out the inner animated character in people,” says Martin, who has been furry for more than 10 years. “Some people completely transform their personality while wearing a suit. You never know how people are going to react when they put one on for the first time.” For many queer furries, being in fursuit also offers a safety net to explore feelings and traits that they may not be comfortable showing in normal society. “A fursuit can be a wonderful tool to overcome anxiety, being introverted, or just become a giant animal and have fun,” says Amazon, sporting the name of his husky-themed fursona. Conventions provide a cornerstone of furry social gatherings, where displays of anthropomorphic art and a welcoming atmosphere take center stage. Cities across the world host annual furry conventions today, from Anthrocon in Pittsburg to DenFur in—you guessed it—Denver, which are attended by as many as several thousand enthusiasts. The community benefits extend far beyond the convention walls. “Charity holds a very special place in the hearts of the fandom,” says Amazon, a director for DenFur. “Every convention has some type of charity as part of the event, and they are always blown away by the incredible generosity of the fandom. Furries have opened their wallets to the tune of literally hundreds and hundreds of thousands of dollars, given to charities (both human and animal) all around the world every year.” The convention also brings significant tourism dollars to surrounding businesses in host locations. Here in Denver, described as a current “furry mecca” of the U.S., the community also engages socially in events like small-scale meetups, park outings, and bar nights. “Public suiting, where a group of fursuiters (and other furries not in suit) will go out to a public place and interact with the general public, has become very popular. Patrons just love it when they walk in the door, asking for pictures, and yes, even hugs,” Amazon reflects. Despite an abundance of positive aspects, the furry community has been long misunderstood as a culture oriented strictly around sex, a label often perpetuated by the media in a negative light. Yet, as we consider what we may have heard in the news, it is important to remember that mainstream culture both thrives upon and condemns ideas of sexual exploration. Take this example—Along the highways of even the reddest of states, massive adult megastores feature an immeasurable volume of exploratory merchandise while receiving seemingly no pushback from surrounding communities. So, what is it about furry fandom that generates so much fear and criticism? Examining the depth of this misconception may suggest at least two primary influencing factors. First, the communi-

ty’s overwhelmingly LGBTQ nature, combined with events featuring costuming, dance parties, and non-traditional looks are among the first of any social gatherings to be categorized as unusual or sex-frenzied. Predominantly queer subcultures have been no stranger to these labels, which are typically slow to evolve to larger societal acceptance. Second, there is something inherently primal in the concept of embracing animalistic connection. This idea contrasts a centuries-old lesson that "human beings are not animals," a phrase I recall hearing during several Sunday teachings growing up. The existential debate of behavioral norms instilled by those in power is reflective of the strive for sex positivity itself, frequently pushing back against the idea that we may simply be allowed to enjoy liveliness in the way we desire as creatures of this planet. Does sex exist in the furry community? Certainly, for some. Is it the defining characteristic of the fandom? Absolutely not. The attributes of freedom, non-judgment, exploration of identity, and acceptance illuminate this unique and vibrant global group. The sexual aspect need not be ignored either— only viewed upon as part of the human experience. As expertly stated in The Fandom, “Furry is full of sexuality because furry is full of human beings who are alive.” We must not forget that who and what any of us embody is deeper than any headline, any label, or any whispered comment. What can we learn about ourselves by examining or partaking in furry fandom? “Carving alternative routes and creating your own unique path is what life should be all about,” Martin says. “I’m perfectly content being in the weird corner with my weird furry friends.” I believe that if exploring our inner truth can spark inspiration, if a dancing blue wolf can transpire a smile, or if the delight of animated creatures brings a sense of connection to our unique planet, why not approach with an unfiltered sense of curiosity? In today’s modern world of trying to craft the perfect image and constantly reaching for societal and personal acceptance, perhaps we all could benefit from enjoying moments where things feel a little less serious. Additionally, the creativity and artistry of our culture is enhanced when we geek out about the interests that make us feel passionately alive. Furry fandom, now several decades beyond its societal origins, displays this quality perhaps greater than any other global following. Those interested in attending DenFur this summer can expect panels from fellow attendees, shopping with more than 75 fandom-owned businesses, and a dance competition. “The best part though isn't the formal organized events— It's reuniting with old friends, making new ones, and just having fun and creating amazing memories,” Amazon says. So, will this normie, curious writer one day find himself exploring the freedom of a fursuit? Well … we are part of the animal kingdom, aren’t we? outfrontmagazine.com 21

Creating Queer Space Online: An Ode to the Titans of the 2000s by Keegan Williams

he internet in the 2000s felt a bit lighter compared to the digital landscape of today, almost like an experimental playground. I think back to the hours spent on sites like Albino Blacksheep and Ebaum’s World taking in the most nonsensical flash content, or my first blind run-through of The Scary Maze Game (after which I proceeded to run out of the house).

Looking back even further, I recall the fascination with AOL Instant Messenger, latching onto acronyms, emoticons, and early internet slang. As a queer kid growing up in the 90s and 2000s, it’s almost overwhelming witnessing and embracing the amount of affirming, digital spaces we see today. Though, I think back to those initial days and their role in setting the foundation these online queer spaces sit upon today. So, take a look back as look back at internet’s past and the websites (and queer folks who used them) that paved the way for today’s plentiful, digital communities of queerness.

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LiveJournal LiveJournal blended the social network model with online diaries, and plentiful privacy settings to give users free rein to pour all of their deepest, most intimate thoughts onto the internet. The website acted as a way to bring together people with similar, niche interests in its option to build smaller communities for posting within the platform. Some concepts of the 2000s seem a little wild by today’s standards, including LiveJournal, but who’s to say? We’re also comparing it to modern-day apps like TikTok, which is essentially the opposite of anonymous. For many teens of the 2000s, it was the perfect outlet. For queer teens? It often acted as a place to work through emerging questions around their identity among other supportive parties. Though it wasn’t long ago, we have to remember that the 2000s were overall a very different time to be LGBTQ. Even cisgender queer representation, and legislative moves toward equity, were few and far between, and trans folks were hardly a discussion at all. Spaces like LiveJournal let teens seek out support and representation they may not have had at home, among people from all over with all kinds of different lived experiences. Many users simply outgrew the website, but it was a way to express themselves without all of the baggage and pressure of saying the same things face-to-face, while exploring communities and topics, and seeking out the support you might not have immediate access to IRL.

For some, it was as direct as taking part in queer guilds or finding consistent friends in queer players. The in-game chat function had numerous limitations that made it challenging to talk unfiltered about their lives, with words like “kiss,” “girlfriend,” “boyfriend,” and “dating” all flagged. With codes, letter replacement, or simply moving to chat with Neopet friends offsite, LGBTQ users found a way to find their people.

DeviantArt

Customizing your profile was like decorating the walls of your room. You had to make it FULLY represent everything you were, and everything you wanted to be—not to mention the blog posts, which often felt reserved for intimate, internal commentary that your friend might casually share on their Instagram story today. The bulletins were rife with increasingly lengthy questionnaires to repost (and if you don’t, the ghost of a child would stab you while you’re sleeping), also challenging users to reveal elements of their sexuality and ideas around intimacy, romance, and gender in a more public capacity.

For artists of the 2000s, DeviantArt was the place to be. It acted as a sort of online art portfolio, though it was also a great place to browse and follow other artists, inviting in comments, countless tags, and an entire digital playground of visuals.

It was also monumental in its user filter abilities, including sexual orientation. For some people (me!), it was their first experience using the internet to meet other queer kids to hang out with in real life.

The website was also plentiful in fan art and users celebrating the fandoms they loved. For gamers and anime fans, also around the time when digital art saw a hearty growth spurt, you could find anything and everything. And of course these subcultures aren’t inherently queer, but as our preceding entree mentions, LGBTQ kids very much mesh with these niche interests and spaces, back in the 2000s and even today.

Now MySpace has rebranded as a music site, and I’m still mourning because I never screenshotted my perfectly curated layout before the site shifted. We are endlessly sad but happy for the memories we made along the way.

Also, it’s cute and fun, and there’s a rainbow Neopet option. Of course the queers were there.

This was also a place to connect with alternative folks as a whole. While some users showed their faces, many represented themselves solely with their art and words, offering a choose-your-own adventure experience for creatives. Personally, I still have a handful of online friends I met from DeviantArt back in 2007. Fun fact, we’re all nonbinary and queer!

Neopets

MySpace

It was also during this time that many queer kids and teens escaped into fandoms and niche spaces to find affirming parties to explore themselves.

Ahh, MySpace—The iconic spot where many of us learned basic HTML coding to get our pages just right; the revolutionary platform that dared us to rank our friends on a public "Top 8" list; the infamous Millennial graveyard of high-angled selfies, flat-ironed hair, and everyone’s friend Tom.

Neopets had a simple concept: You have your pets; you can customize them; you explore Neopia with them and enjoy. Similar to LiveJournal, the anonymity of Neopets allowed users to spew their secrets and internal monologues to the masses. Neopets also had a sort of impermanence with the way it stored data, so it wasn’t online forever.

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Everyone was on MySpace. It still holds a special place in many of our hearts. It was also where we began getting a bit more candid online and expressing ourselves online to the people we knew in person.

Tumblr I would argue that Tumblr was one of the first true homes of queer internet culture, or at least one of the most visible when we talk about LGBTQ internet spaces. The site launched in 2007 and ballooned into popularity in the years following, especially in the early 2010s. In its prime, Tumblr was a hub for endless fandoms, niche topics, everything "aesthetic," and as a whole helped to bring a number of LGBTQ topics to the forefront of the culture. The amount of queer discourse on Tumblr is sometimes referenced in infamy; many Millennial TikTok users reference that the queer discourse on the app feels very similar to the same conversations on Tumblr 10 years prior. But it normalized conversations around asexuality and aromanticism; other LGBTQ identities; and queerness, gender spectrums, and LGBTQ journeys as a whole, giving queer kids and young adults an affirming place to explore themselves and an abundance of queer topics.

Tumblr also felt like a sort of transition to the new era of the internet, bridging the gap between the 2000s and 2010s and working with everything that came before it. There’s not finite way to measure the impact of Tumblr, but for many Millennial and Gen Z queers, it was a formative part of their queer awakening. § The world’s queer internet pioneers set forth to use what they had, and in retrospect, that very different internet still had its own, very queer niche spaces, even if that wasn’t their initial intention. We’re fortunate to have so many digital spaces today, made explicitly by and for queer folks, and for that, we nod to the online icons of Y2K (and look ahead in horror as all our mobile apps are steadily homogenized and we face whatever the hell Zuckerberg is planning with this Meta platform).

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A Beauty of COsplay SayoNay by Denny Patterson

hether it’s dressing up as your favorite anime character or comic book superhero, the artistic expression of cosplay comes in many forms. For SayoNay, she likes to transform herself with body paint into bold, colorful characters, which has earned her a mass following on social media. Funny and quirky, SayoNay can outshine anyone in the darkest of days with her style and looks, which she pulls from the macabre and her Nigerian and Jamaican culture. Outside of cosplay, she currently works as a pharmacy technician at Johns Hopkins in Baltimore and attends school for forensic pathology. OFM had the opportunity to learn more about the woman behind the cosplayer. outfrontmagazine.com 27

Can you begin by telling us how you fell into the world of cosplay and what makes it so special to you? I was introduced to cosplay around 2013 when I was coming from John Hopkins one day and saw all these people wearing cosplays and costumes. I was like, “What is this?” People were dressed up as Naruto; people were dressed up as Sailor Moon, and I lost my mind because I love Sailor Moon (laughs). My favorite holiday is Halloween, and I was like, “Oh my gosh, this is like Halloween on speed.” I asked someone what was going on, and they said, “It’s for a convention called Otakon.” I was actually dating someone at the time who was familiar with Otakon, and I was like, “How come you never told me this existed?” That was it after that. It opened my eyes to something brand new, and about a year later, I started cosplaying. However, when it comes to dressing up in costumes, that is something I always did, ever since I was a kid. Whether it was for Halloween, theatre, or dance, it has always been a part of me. How would you describe your cosplay style and aesthetic? My side is more so on the darker side of macabre. I love Afro-gothic, and I love bringing my Nigerian culture into my cosplays, so I try to do that as much as I can. I also love villainous characters because they are so much fun! Villains are so multi-dimensional, and they all have a backstory. For real people, I believe their backstories are much more relatable than heroes. We all go through trauma, and we can all be a villain depending on that certain situation. I believe I always related to villains because they always have such a colorful background explaining why they are the way they are. They could be vigilante or psychotic: it all depends. Looking through your social media, I am amazed at some of the looks you have created. Where do you primarily pull inspiration from? I usually pull inspiration from abstract art and childhood characters that I really gravitated towards, like Cartoon Network and anime. Anime has been my tried and true since I was in elementary school. I also love graphic novels and webtoons, and I think that's really what blew up my cosplay page. My niece insisted that I make one, but I was like, “No one wants to see what I do. I don’t want all eyes to be on me.” I also love doing things that you usually don’t see a lot of people do. I could be a Naruto character or a Sailor Moon character, but who would ever think of being Oblina from Ahh Real Monsters? Like, that’s awesome!

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"I always related to villains because they always have such a colorful background explaining why they are the way they are."

Photos courtesy of SayoNay outfrontmagazine.com 29

When thinking about your looks, is there one that always stands out in your mind? That is always such a hard question, but I would say, the biblically accurate angels. I wouldn’t classify myself as religious, but I do have a Christian background so to speak. I’m much more spiritual. The Old Testament talks about the hierarchy of angels, and we were taught to believe that they look much different than what’s described. Cherubs, for example, we know them as cute little babies with pot bellies and wings, but when you go into the history of the hierarchy of angels, they look like demons. I'm like, “This is great! This is fantastic!” We started seeing TikTok and YouTube videos last year or so on biblically accurate angels and how they are described, and I’m like, “This is fire. I must try and do my rendition of it.” I'm actually thinking about doing more of those cosplays in the future. What has been the most difficult cosplay you have done, and what made it so challenging? Now, that’s an easy one. Body paint does not paint evenly, especially the different colors that you use. For someone with a darker skin tone, I would say to use colors like lighter yellows and white. They want to blend into our color, versus someone with more fair skin who probably wouldn't have as much of an issue blending. I did Eris from Lore Olympus, and the character is yellow. I've never cursed so much in my entire life putting on body paint (laughs). I wanted to make it as flawless as possible, but it was trying to merge into my own skin tone. I'm like, “No! I don't want brown; I want yellow.” It finally turned out great, but that was a hot mess. There was a lot of cursing involved. Do you prefer to do solo cosplays, or cosplays with other people? I do not like group projects because, a lot of times, I don’t have a game plan. When I’m doing cosplays in my head, I have more of a rough draft. I was never much of a rough draft person either. Even in school, the teacher’s like, “Write me a rough draft.” “OK, here’s the final copy.” They’re like, “No, that’s not what I asked for.” So, I like to do projects on my own, and with social media, I feel like you need to have everything nice and organized. When I’m cosplaying, it’s a hot mess. It’s a blob of color everywhere. Let me be a messy artist in my own world! 3 0 OFM JULY 2 0 2 2

Are there any other cosplayers that you really admire? Oh, yes! Diana the Great is my cosplay wife, so everyone should check her out, but everyone should also check out Queenie Shah. She is spectacular! I guess you would consider her a bio queen in a way because she does a lot of drag inspired makeup, and she’s just fantastic. She does a lot of applications, like putting rhinestones on accessories, and that takes such a long time. So, on top of her doing her makeup, she will make an entire crown out of rhinestones. She'll make an entire melee weapon out of rhinestones, and it'll take her weeks to do it. She should have hundreds of thousands of followers.

Are there any long-term goals you hope to achieve as a cosplayer? I’m all about body positivity and making cosplay inclusive. A lot of people don’t understand that cosplayers are just a bunch of nerds (laughs). We don’t have any expectations. We could just throw on a cape and paper crown and be like, “This is my cosplay.” Now that it’s become mainstream, there’s so much pressure to look and act a certain way—how our hair is, how our skin is—it’s kind of being compared to modeling, which is bothersome to me. People want to do this for fun, not clout. So, I want to encourage people who are afraid of getting into cosplay to just do it.

Because cosplay is an artistic expression, what is something you have learned about yourself through this outlet? I would say, confidence. It takes a lot to put your craft out there, and everyone’s not going to like it, but that’s OK. I had to pass that hurdle before I went into cosplay because I was so worried about what people would think of me. I would constantly compare myself to big-name cosplayers being like, my craft is not at that level yet, so people won't gravitate to me.

Some people are like, “I have to lose weight.” No, you don’t. You didn’t have to lose weight for Halloween, right? You just put on an outfit and went out to get candy. It’s the same vibe. I want to keep pushing that envelope, and in the future, I would love to possibly make a body paint line for individuals with sensitive skin. I have eczema, and I know that a lot of people who have sensitive skin or skin issues are kind of hesitant about body paint. I want to create something they can try that's not going to irritate them.

I learned that if people are going to like me and follow me, it’s because I’m doing something that they do like. I don’t need to be somebody else that I’m not. I can just continue my own journey, and if people follow what I love, that's great. That's wonderful. I don't need to have a whole bunch of followers just to have a few people that really like what I do. That's encouraging.

Before we wrap up, is there anything else you would like to mention or plug? I just want to say thank you so much for this wonderful opportunity! It was a pleasure. Stay up-to-date and connect with SayoNay by following her on Facebook and Instagram @sayonay_cosplay.

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Scan the QR code for more information

855-752-6749 ConnectforHealthCO.com 3 2 OFM JULY 2 0 2 2

Kinky CosplAy Photos by Julius Garrido Models: Christopher La Fleur (he/him), Tab Solomon Gleason (he/they), Quincey Roisum (he/him) When it comes to queer nerd culture, we can’t get enough. And that’s because a lot of us used, and still use, fandoms and fixations as coping mechanisms as we view the world through our queer lens. Shot on location at Mile High Comics, a queer comic shop in Denver known for providing a local space and outlet for the queer and geeky communities, we drew inspiraton from the rows and rows of fandom and nostalgia for these photos.

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Quincey on finding refuge in fandom: “Growing up, I was made fun of for being overweight at home and at school for being gay, even before I knew what that meant exactly. Like most of the queer community, I was teased growing up, but I was teased for more than one reason which, for me, was hard to handle. For a half hour every day I would forget about being teased; I’d forget about being made fun of. For that half hour, I’d feel cool like the Red Ranger, Jason. “I looked up to Jason and wanted to be like him. Jason was always helpful and understanding, and always encouraged his friends to believe in themselves and follow their dreams. When I was little, I cried a lot, but I was always happy when I’d watch the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. Watching this show as a kid helped me be more creative and believe in myself more. I was always coloring and playing with my action figures and always using my imagination. “If it wasn’t for MMPR, I don’t know how well growing up would have gone for me. Watching the show, I always felt I could be anything I wanted to be. As an adult, MMPR still holds a very special place in my heart and still helps me believe I can do anything I set my mind to. MMPR also helps me get into cosplay and comic-cons, and I know wanting to be my favorite hero helped me be interested in dressing up and pretending to be my favorite diva belting out my favorite ballad. “Dressing up as a cosplayer or performing as a drag queen were never things I didn’t think I could do because I never let any limitations stop me. I owe a lot of the loving and supportive queer man I am today to the MMPR and my childhood hero. In 2015, I even got to meet my childhood hero at a comic con, and even if his line were across the entire arena, I would have waited as long as I needed to, to meet who was there for me during a difficult time, even though he never knew.” outfrontmagazine.com 37

Christopher on connecting to manga: “I’ve always found comic book and movie poster art inspiring. It informs my work. Movie posters and comics are iconic—They tell complex stories in a few powerful images. “However, looking back through my memory, I realized: My first experience with graphic novels was the now-iconic Blankets by Craig Thompson. It’s the story of a sexually-abused young man questioning his sexuality in a deeply religious home environment, and his subsequent experiences navigating life. For me, a seventh grader hiding in the back of the library, it hit so close to home.”

Tab on Cosplay Euphoria: “As a nonbinary, transmasculine individual, nerdy fandom has always provided a safe place for me to explore my selfexpression. I remember as a child, when I first cosplayed Qui-Gon Jinn from Star Wars, it gave me such a feeling of freedom and gender euphoria to be able to draw a beard on and feel accepted. Before that, I was afraid to present myself as a male character due to societal expectations. But, to my delight, I found most nerdy fandoms to be very genderfluid and accepting, which led me down a wonderful road of self-exploration and beautiful community interactions.”

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Lynda Carter

is Wonderfully ‘Human and Divine’ by Denny Patterson

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ynda Carter may be best known for winning our hearts as Wonder Woman—a character she infused with such depth and humor that it has become one of the most indelible characters in television history—but many do not know that she is an accomplished singer who has performed to rave reviews before sell-out crowds around the world. Making her professional singing debut at age 14 in Scottsdale, Arizona, Carter traveled on the road with bands for a short time before becoming a Hollywood actress. However, her roots always remained with her music. “Singing is my soul,” she says.

Photos courtesy of DPG Worldwide and Lynda Carter

“

(Wonder Woman has) been a gay icon, a queer icon, an LGBTQ icon for a very long time, and it’s nothing something that was written about or created. It just is. It simply just is.

“

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An engaging storyteller, she takes audiences on a journey where her life and story intertwine. Carter’s recent releases include the 2021 EP Unexpected and her latest single, the original pop ballad “Human and Divine.” Produced by Kyle Lehning, the track is nothing less than an epic with themes of love, strength, and inspiration in her life resonating throughout. Carter is currently recording new songs for release in the summer of 2022, and on July 1, we can expect a Dave Audé remix of “Human and Divine.” “When Lynda Carter called me to remix ‘Human and Divine,’ I knew I had to do something that lived up to the larger-than-life persona we all know and love,” Audé says. “I was super excited to do something epic and at the same time keeping the spirit of the original.” OFM caught up with Carter to dish about the song and portraying the iconic superhero.

Can you begin by telling us more about the remix of your single “Human and Divine?” This remix was done by Dave Audé. We approached him; he listened to the song, and he really liked it. So, this was a labor of love from my point of view. I love what he does, and I was a little nervous because it’s not exactly my wheelhouse or what people would necessarily expect from me. However, this song and ones that I’ve done subsequent to this, I think they are a step into another part of my personality that people just don’t know. It’s just another piece of it, and I think in many ways, Dave inspired me to go out on a limb more with the things that I can write and the things that I want to do. This whole dance mix, it makes you feel good and inspired. He stayed true to the song, and it has a lot of profound meanings. You originally released the track last year. For those who don’t know, can you talk about the inspiration behind the song and how it has become one of the most emotionally resonant songs of your career? I would say this song started out as a quest with my writing. I was with my husband, and I believe we were on our way to England to shoot my cameo for Wonder Woman 1984. While I was writing, I looked over at him, and I thought, “How do I define this love? If I’m going to write about love, is it this? There are a lot of physical things, so how do you define it?” So, I thought it should be a little more experimental; then I thought of Steve and Diana and how their love is very cinematic. So, the original version is more cinematic in its approach with a great deal of low-bass voices. You can’t really tell unless you’re listening on big speakers, but there’s a profound feeling to it. Ultimately, what do you hope listeners take away from “Human and Divine?” That they are human and divine. That the human pieces of you and I are flawed, and we are going to inadvertently end up hurting the people we love just by being thoughtless or harsh, or someone else might hurt us. The forgiveness piece of love is really the greatest part of loving. That really takes love to a new place within our own bodies—not assigned to a deity or any person’s god, but within your own self.

While doing research for this interview, I read that you made your professional singing debut at age 14. Did your love for singing and songwriting come before acting? Yes, it did. I actually started, like many of us do, making up shows and things and making my poor family sit there through the four acts of a play or musical (laughs). I sang in everything I possibly could. Like, “I’ll do it!” Then I joined a band at 14 and was singing in bands until I was 17. Obviously, the world knows you as the iconic superhero Wonder Woman. How has this role changed your life? It’s been the bulk of my life, so I almost don’t know much or have a lot of experience outside having the moniker of Wonder Woman. I was young when I first landed the role, and I spent those early years, like every other actor, studying, singing, doing commercials, and things like that, but I think it’s a responsibility. I cannot expect people to understand who I am as an individual that I’ve come to appreciate. They know me as that, but I walk around as just myself, and I have to appreciate the fact that other people see me as an entity of another sort. Even if it’s casually, the same people I see at the store or something, there’s a responsibility there, and I can’t always be my goofy self. Recently, you came out saying that she is indeed a queer icon. Why do you say that? Well, duh! (Laughs.) Like, yes! She’s been a gay icon, a queer icon, a LGBTQ icon for a very long time, and it’s not something that was written about or created. It just is. It simply just is. This feeling of empowerment doesn’t belong to anyone but yourself. Can we expect any more Wonder Woman films in the future? Everybody on the other side says that I’m in Wonder Woman 3, although I have not seen a script yet. When Patty Jenkins tells me that I’m in Wonder Woman 3, I’ll let you know. What more do you hope to accomplish with your career and platform? Now, that’s a big question. I really hope to continue to inspire, and I hope that none of my foibles, none of my own humaneness, ever distracts from that because I am flawed. Just like everyone else, I’m imperfect, and I get cranky. I think when we assign perfection to anyone that we admire, we’re going down a slippery slope. Stay up-to-date and connect with Carter by following her on Facebook @officiallyndacarter, and Twitter and Instagram @reallyndacarter. The Dave Audé remix of “Human and Divine” is now available on all digital streaming platforms.

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by Denny Patterson

Spook y, Kook y, and Rad as Hell: 4 4 OFM JULY 2 0 2 2

Asa Queen

fter moving to the Mile High City from North Carolina in search for a fresh start in life, Asa Queen was encouraged to pursue the art of drag. Immediately, they found a place among the community’s diverse range of talent. Whether it’s spooky, alternative, or downright bizarre, one can always expect greatness from an Asa Queen performance. OFM caught up with the self-proclaimed “cartoon demon hooker” to learn more about what they are all about. Photos courtesy of Asa Queen and Kendra Colleen o u t f r o n tm a g a z i n e. co m 45

Can you begin by telling us more about how you discovered your love and passion for drag? My first experience with drag was probably RuPaul’s Drag Race, the season that Sharon Needles was in. Don’t love her, but it was a great opportunity to see other alternative people that do drag before that was really a thing, especially in North Carolina where it’s very pageantry and dance. So, that was my first experience with drag, and I never even thought about doing drag until I moved out here. It was kind of accidental. I used to go to these Tuesday shows at Pride and Swagger, and it was a drag king bar, so the drag kings encouraged me to start drag and gave me a little home to begin at. Scrolling through your Instagram, I cannot believe how fierce your looks are. How long does it usually take you to get dolled up? An easy look, probably an hour. Whenever I paint head to toe, like a solid color, or I’m doing some interesting, weird stuff, that takes me about three hours. When you think about some of your looks, is there one that always stands out in your mind? I really enjoyed it, and somebody did some artwork of it too for some merch—Essentially, I had a cheap little drugstore foundation on and some fake bruises. I was doing the photoshoot where I was just swimming around in dirty water in someone’s bath, but I really like it because it shows I don’t have to do a lot to make impactful statements with my looks or drag. What makes Asa Queen unique and different from all the other Mile High drag artists? That’s a hard question because Denver is very diverse when it comes to drag, but there’s not a lot of people that do what I do. One of my first competitions, the note that I got, and it was seen as a negative thing, but I see it as a positive for myself, they told me they weren’t sure if I was trying to be scary or sexy. So, I enjoy the fact that I can even confuse drag people with what I’m doing. 4 6 OFM JULY 2 0 2 2

Spooky and alternative drag has always been around, but do you think it’s finding more of a niche in the mainstream? It is definitely becoming more popular, and I think other pop culture has to do with that, like goth and e-boy/e-girl fashion. It’s just evolving to a point where people don’t feel as weird to express that they like spooky or gross things. Who are some of your biggest drag influences? I am obsessed with Trixie Mattel. I think a lot of people who have known me for a while have seen my makeup slowly get into that overdrawn kind of look. So, I really love them, and somebody else that inspires me a lot is Jinkx Monsoon because of the way they speak out on things and actually do a lot for their community, all while continuing their drag career and doing as much as they can. Do you have a resident club or bar that you perform at in Denver? I perform at least three shows a month at the Electric Cure in Edgewater, but I generally just go from bar to bar most of the time. What kind of shows do you do? I do a lot of nightlife shows, so a lot of 8 p.m.-and-after kind of stuff. I’m slowly moving into the brunch shows, but it’s weird for me because it’s gals with their friends having lunch and not people that are trashed and getting blacked out (laughs). What can one always expect from an Asa Queen performance? A lot of energy. My numbers may have slow moments, but it’s never a dull fucking moment. I’ve never done a park and bark. Do you have a favorite number to perform? “Bloody Mary” by Lady Gaga is my known number. I’ve probably done it at least once at every bar I’ve performed at. I love Gaga, and this is a dark song that’s also very poppy. It’s fun to perform because I love to act, as well as perform. So, I get to do a little bit of acting and dancing, and then I always love to do a spit blood take all over myself. This is just a perfect song that feeds into that.

What makes the Denver drag community so special to you? Like I said earlier, I just love the diversity. I guess we have our BINGO queens, if that’s what you would want to call them, but there’s a lot of artsy performers. I think the past two winners of Drag Race from Denver really speak volumes for what drag is here. Yvie Oddly and Willow Pill really represent what we have going on here. Drag in Denver may be pretty, but it’s still alternative, weird, and hard to understand for some people. What are some of your interests outside of drag? Over quarantine, I started doing taxidermy. So, there’s that, and I’ve been painting since high school. What are some future goals you hope to achieve with your drag career? You’re actually helping me with a goal for this year. I hoped to be published or written about in a queer magazine, but as for other long-term goals, I definitely want to see myself branch out a little bit more. Currently, I’m still very uncomfortable with doing shows out of state by myself, but hopefully I’ll get to a point where that doesn’t bother me as much. I have a drag sister, Arachnophobia, Chärlotte is her human name, and she helps me a lot. She’s a drag artist as well, and it really helps to have family at your show with you whenever you’re surrounded by people who want to touch and grab you. Do you have any desire to be on Drag Race or any other reality competition series? I have hoped to maybe be on Dragula in the next three to five years. I’m working myself up to that. Before we wrap up, are there any other upcoming projects or anything else you’d like to mention or plug? I am currently working on a YouTube show coming soon where it will be me hanging out with other queens and kings called Mentally Ill with Friends. First episode will be posted on October 28, my birthday! Other than that, I hope everyone had an amazing Pride Month! Stay up-to-date and connect with Asa Queen by following them on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube @_asqueen_.

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Ask a Coach by Ingomu

Welcome to Ask a Coach, where Ingomu coaches answer your questions about life, work, wellness, or matters of the soul. Share your question with us at coaches@ingomu.com, and we’ll answer them here.

My partner and I have been together for six years. Lately, she has been hinting at wanting a more open relationship but staying committed to me. I have no idea how to navigate that conversation or if this can even work for me. Where do I start? -Nor K. I want to first offer acknowledgement for your willingness to explore more about something that your partner has shown interest in, as well as your attunement to her. Your curiosity is a strength that can support you as you navigate these conversations. Since your partner has “hinted” at wanting a more open relationship, a great place to start is by having a direct conversation with her about what having a more open relationship means and looks like from her perspective in the context of your partnership; this may take more than one conversation. There are many styles of open relationships, often referred to as ethical non-monogamy, which is great for those wanting to create relationships outside of the monogamous narrative. However, because there are so many possibilities with opening relationships, it’s really important that partners understand what is and is not meant in opening the relationship. Entering these conversations with as much curiosity as possible will allow you to understand and gain more clarity about what your partner wants, so that you can know if that aligns with your desires as well. -Queer Relationship Coach Liana Griebsch 4 8 OFM JULY 2 0 2 2

My new employer celebrates diversity and authenticity, which I appreciate. I am trying to navigate what authenticity at work means. Any advice on how to show my authentic self but still be professional? -Trevor H. One way to practice being more authentic at work is through our everyday communication. We can start sharing from a place of transparency rather than holding back in fear. It can be awkward at first, but so satisfying once you master it. When you offer feedback, answer a question at a meeting, or participate in brainstorming, you can say not only what you think, but why you think that way. For example, “I think we should attend the job fair at the elementary school. I attended public schools in Detroit, and many of us didn’t get to see a variety of career options.” I remember coaching a successful executive who didn’t feel comfortable sharing that she grew up living in the projects. When she finally incorporated “her story” into talks with her team, she connected with them in a deeper way. She felt a sense of freedom from walking in her truth at work. It also had a rippling effect, and others started feeling that it was safe to share about themselves more authentically too. -Coach Kim Bettie We’ve just returned to the office full time, and my anxiety is returning with it. Is there anything I can do to calm my mind while at work so I can perform at my best, without being anxious and stressed all the time? -Kayla B. One quick way to calm the mind is to use the power of your breath: Exhale longer than you inhale. You can do this any time you feel your mind racing and tension rising. Keep at it until the mind calms.

Another quick technique consists of shifting your attention to the soles of your feet. It sounds weird, but it works wonders for getting out of your head and into the present moment. Combine the two techniques for a powerful, immediate way to be here and now so you can perform at your best. -Coach Anne Trager, CHPC, ACC I always recommend pairing undesired tasks with desired ones. Right now, being at the office full time brings anxiety and stress. Make a list of all your favorite things that you could take with you to the office until it adjusts back to being a better circumstance, whether it be coffee, cozy socks, or replicating favorites from your home office. Give yourself something to look forward to, like packing the best lunches for a few weeks. Focus on keeping your body physically comfortable while your brain and heart adjust at their own paces. -Coach Jen Nash Here at Ingomu, we uplift humankind by making a positive difference in the lives of many. Via the Ingomu app, we provide holistic and equitable coaching in the areas of life, work, wellness, and soul. Coaching for everyone because everyone matters. Learn more at OFM.ingomu.com.

Ask a Coach

“There are many styles of open relationships, often referred to as ethical non-monogamy, which is great for those wanting to create relationships outside of the monogamous narrative.”

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Mantra: “I’m ready to be my own hero.“

Superhero

Magick

ven though the days of Hercules are far behind us, people still look to larger-than-life archetypes for strength, But instead of finding inspiration in myths about gods, in modern times, we look to superheroes.

Some think that, just like the gods of old, the collective consciousness of modern superheroes is so strong that they have become thoughtforms that can lend their superhuman strength to anyone who seeks to tap into the resource. So if you’d like to give superhero magick a try, here’s how you can get started: Pick Your Hero Think about your favorite superheroes. You could watch your favorite movie starring your hero or read a graphic novel featuring your hero to get inspired. Take note of what parts of the story really speak to you. Why would you like to incorporate your hero’s attributes into your life? Communicate with your Superhero You need to gain your hero’s consent to work with them. Whether you think the answers come from the subconscious or from beyond, this is crucial to connecting intention to action to will to manifestation. You can ask your hero using tarot, a pendulum, or you could even flip a coin. Once you have consent, it’s time to create a power object.

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by Alanna L.P.

Creating a Talisman Does your hero have a special transformation object or a meaningful piece of jewelry that you can buy or create? If you don’t like to wear jewelry, you could even choose a keychain with your hero on it or even draw your hero’s symbol with intention on a piece of paper. Charging the Talisman Just like a piece of electronics, a talisman doesn’t work unless it’s charged. While you work, you may want to play your hero’s theme song, wear your hero’s color, or even cosplay your hero. Think about your intention for creating the talisman. Write your magick words that will activate your talisman. Example: My superhero guardian is Sailor Moon. I have been working with her energetically since I was a tween because she reminds me that love is our greatest weapon in the fight for justice. If I wanted to charge a Sailor Moon talisman, I would hold it in my right hand and chant: Sailor Moon, please help me wield the power of love. Another option could be to use your hero’s words of power—a phrase or word that the hero uses in battle. You may chant your words of power as many times as you choose. The important part is that you focus your intention in such a way that you are able to internalize the attribute you are seeking. Carry your talisman, or wear it while you forge a relationship with your hero and work with their energy. Write down any experiences that stand out to you.

KINK

Beyond The Binary Trans People Without Dysphoria Must Recognize Their Privilege by Keegan Williams

Initially, when I decided to start this series of columns on the nonbinary experience, I knew it would be a challenging task. I’m frantically checking my word count as the paragraphs stack up, attempting to explore dense concepts surrounding gender, identity, and the binary that a couple magazine pages can’t begin to contain. I also understand that I’m speaking from my very specific lived experience as a nonbinary person. I’m white; I’m a millennial; I’m able-bodied; I live in a very liberal city, and I very rarely experience gender dysphoria. There are still conflicting ideas in the community as to what it means to be trans. By definition, being trans is when one’s gender is different from the gender they were assigned at birth. The conversation has opened up in recent years, recognizing that if we begin to police gender based on someone’s need for gender-affirming medical care, we might be missing the point of gender liberation entirely. Trans elders didn’t necessarily have this middle-ground to explore. There wasn’t the visibility we see today to explore gender on one’s own terms; transitioning and seeking medical care was (and still is) about survival. Yes, the community has expanded, but my lack of consistent or significant gender dysphoria as a trans person is a privilege. I was assigned male at birth, and by societal standards at least, my presentation is perceived as “masculine.” I rarely wear makeup; 5 2 OFM JULY 2 0 2 2

I have facial hair, and I’m not currently pursuing any gender-affirming care as part of my gender journey. A lot of my style and expression meshes the “feminine” and “masculine” in what I wear. I’m also patiently waiting as my hair grows out, eager to have additional styles to explore as soon as it’s long enough. But dysphoria? It happens in slight spurts, but it’s very fleeting for me. Most of the time, I’m comfortable with my body and don’t feel like my anatomy has any bearing or hindrance on my gender as I understand it right now. While people in public rarely recognize my nonbinary gender, or I might get an ugly stare as I wear more feminine clothing, that’s generally where it ends. The fact that people still perceive me as a man, even though I’m not, still dictates how I navigate the world. I can walk around Hollywood at midnight, and my 6’1’’ stature, broad shoulders, and my face generally read as “man’’ regardless of what I’m wearing. Gender dysphoria is incredibly taxing and challenging for many folks to navigate, especially when they might not have the support networks to connect with while they seek out additional care. Of course, that process is far from clean-cut: There are a slew of barriers surrounding access to gender-affirming care. Research on gender-affirming care access is still limited, but a 2017 study published in the journal Sex Res Social Policy explored the trans folks who seek medical care and the barriers they encounter. Hormone therapy was more commonly reported among transgender men (76.8% of respondents) and transgender women

(80.3%), but more than a quarter of genderqueer (28.6%) and nonbinary participants (33.3%) also received hormone therapy. The study notes that financial elements of seeking gender-affirming care were the most commonly reported barrier among respondents. To pursue hormone therapy, individuals must account for the cost of co-pays (even if it’s covered by insurance), lab work, and doctor’s visits, along with the costs of therapy to provide a letter of support to start treatments or seek out surgeries. One respondent noted they weren’t able to keep up with their therapy appointments regularly due to financial issues. “Due to not seeing him as regularly as I should, I have not been able to get a letter to state that I am ready for top surgery. I also have not been able to save enough money for top surgery,” they say. Trans people seeking genderaffirming care also have to sacrifice other important experiences and parts of their lives to account for the financial burdens of receiving such care. One participant noted he couldn’t go to college until he was done saving for surgery. Insurance was the next most commonly cited barrier. Folks might be unemployed, uninsured, unable to afford insurance, or on a family member’s plan which limited them from pursuing care. Even for folks with coverage, insurance companies

may have limited providers or trans-specific exclusions in their policy. Finally, there is the availability of care and lack of access to services. One participant noted that, due to where they live, their only option was working through urgent care, which couldn’t prescribe them hormones because “I haven’t been there before and have no history with them,” they say. In their previous state, they noted every doctor’s office replied with, “We don’t do that here,” when they inquired about hormone therapy. This lack of access means that many trans folks must travel to receive gender-affirming care. For hormone therapy, participants in the study commonly noted having to travel to nearby cities, potentially multiple-hour commutes in one direction, to receive care. This is exasperated when discussing gender-affirming surgeries: top surgery often meant traveling even longer distances or crossing state lines, and bottom surgery often meant traveling outside of the U.S. This lack of access also means that competent professionals might have long waitlists to navigate, and this is of course on top of the financial burden of travel, lodging, and missing work for the surgery and recovery process. I’ve said it before—The wide array of people in the LGBTQ community constantly amaze me, and our diversity is worth celebrating. There’s something so magical about the fact that our different cultures and experiences can so heavily shape the way we navigate our queer and trans selves. We have so much that we can learn from each other in sharing our similarities, differences, and experiences with one another. My privilege does not invalidate my experience as a trans person—the same is true for any trans person with little or no dysphoria—but it matters. We should talk about it and understand our role in exploring these differences in our experiences. Trans and gender-nonconforming folks like me—just like white folks, able-bodied folks, or cis people in the broader queer community— must use this reality to empower and uplift the others in the community who aren’t afforded the same privileges.

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Q: A girl I’m involved with has recently expressed an interest in kink. She is also recently out of a 10-year hetero relationship. Their marriage ended when she realized she was gay. As someone who’s known she was a lesbian since the age of 5, my mind has a hard time comprehending how it can take some women years or decades to realize they’re not into men. I don’t mean that as an insult at all, more just genuinely trying to understand, since it’s foreign to me. Do you have any insight on this? A: I can’t speak for the experience of every lesbian-identified woman who used to date men, but as someone who self-labeled as bisexual for several years when younger, I can at least share some of my own personal reasons as to why I think coming out

I related to a species that Peter Fimrite wrote about in the SF Chronicle—one that is “almost certainly semiaquatic, wading and swimming along the coast— but could not fully commit to the sea because they would have been eaten by giant squid-like cephalopods.” That I equated the giant squid-like cephalopod with our homophobic society to me indicates that when younger, my continued interest in boys probably came from a combination of internalized homophobia and societal pressure. As Alexandria Juarez phrased it: “Womanhood is so often defined through the desire and approval of men.” External validation influenced my choices and preferences at that time, (more so than any internal sense of what made me happy did). As for why your crush may have only recently discovered an interest in kink—It could have to do with the fact

Like I said, I can’t speak for your crush nor can I answer for all women. If you’re wondering why some come out as gay after dating men for years though, these could be some of the (many) reasons. If you’re still wondering, my suggestion is to bring up this topic with her in an organic way. Try not to frame it as interrogation but rather as an honest gesture to learn more about her and her life journey thus far. Maybe her honest answer is that she doesn’t know, and the “why” matters less than the fact that she is here now—finally able to live as her fully authentic self, or at least hold a formerly unexplored facet of herself up to the light. Or maybe she has an intriguing and layered story to tell, the sharing of which will bring the two of you closer.

Queer Girl Q&A by Eleni Stephanides

as “fully gay” took me a bit of time. Before I do though, I want to emphasize that many women and nonbinary people are legitimately and comfortably bi or pansexual. Others realize they’re attracted to multiple genders beyond the two presented as the only options by our culture’s gender binary. In this entry however, I’m specifically referring to women who realize later on in life that they are not attracted to (cis) men. As author Jill Gutowitz put it, “I wondered … could you date boys, and also be a lesbian? (Yes, and I did that for years—It’s very different from being bi or pansexual).” Some of these may apply to your crush, or they might not. Let’s rewind to the year 2003. After my first round of girl crushes plunged (unwanted) into my 13-year-old psyche, I feared fully owning the lesbian label. Bi felt safer. Gay felt riskier and less common, with limiting stereotypes accompanying it.

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that men, more so than women, are encouraged from a young age to pursue what they want. This extends to the realm of sexual pleasure. As Caitlin Johnstone wrote, “a woman’s will for her own sexuality is only just now becoming culturally relevant, a blink of an eye from a historical perspective.” Additionally, was she raised in a conservative or Catholic environment? Ideas regarding women’s roles and sexual modesty may have been baked into her at a young age (as they have been for many women) and might therefore have persisted for a long time—regardless of our modern culture’s predominance of more liberal attitudes. Lastly, it can also be hard at times to distinguish between different kinds of attraction. My first (and only) boyfriend in high school, for example, I was attracted to on an intellectual and emotional level. And when we kissed, though I wasn’t exactly enthused, it also didn’t entirely repulse me. That must have meant there was some level of attraction there, right? I told myself. Even if it didn’t match the strength of what I felt for girls.

Either way, I think you can’t go wrong (and might only stand to strengthen your bond) through broaching the question.

Follow Eleni on Instagram @eleni_steph_writer

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Queer Word Search by Kerry Shatzer

Diversions Word Search - Randy Rainbow

Find the words in the list below hiding across, backwards, up, down and diagonally in the grid. Words separated by a slash “/” are found individually in the puzzle. Words in parentheses “( )” are not in the puzzle. The unused letters starting at top left and going down by row will reveal a quote from Randy!

S N L T I T U S S M L S

N T A O G A E I C U D H

I R B L N Y N O K S A E

A U W C A G M D R I N G

Randy/Rainbow Comedian Singer Political/Satirist Music/Parodies YouTube/Star

Y D N A R O H H E E A A O C A O

M H H G B T E R D G L Y Y M M E

Y M E N K E N I H I T O W D I H

T S I R I T A S T Y T U E I A T

S A R A T N O T G N I T N U H I

(Born in) Huntington Long/Island New York Memoir:/Playing With/Myself Pink/Glasses/Tour

R E H E E J L M L E A U A R S W

M R E T T E D A N R E B E P N T

G E Y N R E C S O F L E S Y M I

N E G S A I P B

I N U E T A A K

Y I R I S L A N D S

A M L D L B U I

L O E O D U E P

P N C R A M E M O I R

O G L A S S E S I N C

T S W P T N E L A T E H

D T

Albums Hey Gurl/(It’s) Christmas A Little/Brains/(A Little) Talent Three/Time/Emmy/Nominee Collaborated (with) Bernadette/Peters

Patti/LuPone Tituss/Burgess Josh Gad Sean/Hayes Alan/Menken Marc/Shaiman

Visit https://www.facebook.com/DiversionsPuzzles for more free puzzles and book info by Kerry Shatzer!

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by Angel Omar Rivera

Beauty Beat Beat Set, Protect, Interject: the Best-Selling Sprays on the Market.

Be it right after you finish a beat or layering between products, setting spray is an important and integral part of anybody’s glam session. Some say that it may not be necessary, but those of us who use it know that it’s the best way to lock in that look. Here, I have tried and ranked the best setting sprays on the market and will share the benefits and results of each wear test. This list should be taken lightly. It is here to enlighten you to what may work well for you and is in no way a reflection of the brand nor any feelings toward it.

5. Urban Decay All-Nighter Setting Spray

4. NYX Matte Fish Setting Spray

3. MAC Fix+

This is a tried-and-true product that many makeup enthusiasts will tell you is one of their favorite setters, and for good reason. After a full 10 hours of nonstop errands, videos and a couple of TikToks, my foundation and shadow stayed in place and looked as vibrant as it did when I put down the brush. I will say if you have oily skin, breakage will be a problem in the T-zone. If that’s the case, try the water-proof and matte versions for the best results.

NYX is known for making some of the best and most affordable beauty products on the market. This unlikely dark horse is an amazing setting spray that will mattify your makeup and keep it from budging all day. The unique formula contains niacinamide, which helps combat shine from forehead to chin. Though, the small bottle and flimsy nozzle create uneven coverage that requires more spritz than you feasibly need. Be weary of half empty bottles as they are notorious for leaking everywhere.

A cult classic setting spray, the MAC Fix+ will literally fix plus more. It’s a unique combination of chamomile, cucumber extract, and caffeine. Meld the makeup into the skin for a fuller face that looks natural. Not only does this spray set, it also preps the skin. It’s perfect for dabbing into hard to please areas of the face to act as an extra layer of primer. This setting spray is perfect for layering between products to create a more seamless coverage between skin and makeup layers.

2. Tarte Shape Tape Stay Spray

1.ONE/SIZE by Patrick Starrr Preserve the Serve Luminous Setting Spray

OK, Tarte, being one of the biggest vegan brands on the market, has one of the best selling concealers in the game, BUT this setting spray may take its place some time in the future. This micro-fine mist gently caresses the skin with aloe and cucumber giving you a hydrated look, while also looking in your makeup. Not only that, this formula is long wearing and gives you a set that will last. It is important to note that the bottle suffers the same spritz method the NYX bottle does and anyone looking to use it needs to be wary of uneven sprays between each use.

THIS. This has to be some sort of chemical magic because after 10-plus hours of wear, the makeup looks fresh and new from shed to the bed. Not only did it give makeup a lustrous look, but it truly locked it in with some amazing skin benefits: goji berry, cactus water, and snow mushroom give the skin a hydrated look without messing with the integrity of the makeup. This spray is truly built for everyone; as the name suggests, one size does fit all.

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Recycle Redux by Angel Omar Rivera

Stock Images

t may seem a bit preachy to hear or read about how the world’s climate is rapidly changing—from the food we eat, the things we put on our face, even the clothes we put on our back. However, textile waste makes up almost 17 million tons of what ends up in landfills. After all, according to the EPA 85% of textiles from resale or donation end up in those same landfills in the United States. Yes, the beloved fashion industry creates tons of waste. It is a sad, inescapable truth. However, with the help of manufacturers and consumers, we can create an ouroboros in fashion, or a cycle which endlessly feeds and benefits from itself without creating waste. There are now quite a few retailers that will take any sort of textiles to recycle them completely into new products. One of the best places to take your clothing to be recycled is the big box, fast-fashion brand H&M. This retailer is unique in that they will take any sort of your unwanted textiles. (Yes, any.) They partner with I:CO (I:Colution), which sorts textiles into three categories— rewear: lightly worn clothing, reuse: clothing that can be remade into new items, and recycle: clothing that is not suitable to be reused. This third category is shredded into textile scrap and is made into a variety of things, such as cleaning supplies and building insulation material.

Since its rollout in 2013, this recycle program is the biggest of its kind around the globe and is one of the easiest ways to get rid of unwanted and unwearable clothes. H&M even has a dedicated an entire line of clothing and shoes that are made from recycled textile and Earthconscious material—not to mention the thank you coupon you receive upon bringing in your recyclables. Though, there are other leaders in fast fashion which have adopted the recycling program. Japanese retailer Uniqlo has also taken strides to recycle clothing and donate clothing from its program to those in need. In addition, 20% of the clothing in the recycling program, dubbed REUniqlo,is turned into a fossil-fuel replacement. One key note of the REUniqlo program is that they will only accept Uniqlo brand clothing, which can put a damper on any sort of bulk recycling some people may have planned. However revolutionary it may seem to make clothing into fuel, it is hard to get behind when the textile range is limited to only one brand.

FORDAYS also donates 1% of each purchase on their site to a nonprofit of your choice—including a couple of options for LGBTQ youth and therapy for trans people, giving you even more reason to recycle and shop. There are many ways for you to recycle your unwanted clothing: in a retail store, online, or even for yourself around your home. What is important is making sure that we work hand-in-hand to close the loop on textile waste.

Now, if you are not keen on getting up and going anywhere, there is a little-known online company known as FORDAYS. This clothing brand is unique in that 100% of clothing made by FORDAYS is made with the recycling process in mind. That’s not the best part: FORDAYS sells a “take back” bag for around $20, and anything in the bag will be recycled into their products. For each “take back” bag you send in, it counts as $20 for your account to spend on FORDAYS’ wide selection of clothing.

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Cannabis Reviews : The Explosive Metaverse of Canna-Pleasure Whether you’re kinky AF, looking to indulge in your nerdy pleasure, or both, cannabis is a great companion, and we’re here to tell you about some of the best and most exciting ways to get in touch with your stoney side. To the dispensary, and beyond!

DADiRRi x Velvet Roots Apothecary Collab DADiRRi and Velvet Roots Apothecary have collaborated to launch a beautiful botanical-infused line unlike any other in today’s market, offering three specific and intentional herbal blends that are mixed with top shelf cannabis, resulting in a carefully curated blend. The three blends are aptly named for the corresponding mood and time of consumption, such as Align (morning), Thrive (daytime), and Soothe (nighttime). Each blend has its own unique and sustainably sourced herbal and cannabis pairing and is packaged in convenient .5-gram pre-rolls with unbleached, bamboo papers and consist of: align, thrive, and soothe. If you’re looking for a way to relax and unwind with some added herbal infusion, look no further than this amazing collab and these tasty pre-rolls.

California Corner

Nugg Club x Khalifa Kush California Box Collab Nugg Club just did us all a favor and collaborated with Khalifa Kush to drop their special, one-of-a-kind California Box Collab. The box comes in several varieties depending on if what pick-two pairing you want. They will curate edibles, vape pens, concentrates, and flower. In my box, I got a variety of tasty goodies and high-end vape carts, and I can’t wait to learn more about all the brands.

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OFM NEW MUSIC by Eric Farwell

This month’s must-catch new releases from the artists you already love and the musicians you need to know.

Lizzo

Beabadoobee

Black Midi

The queen of pop is back with a collection of clever bangers on her latest effort, an album of love songs she took three years to perfect. With music currently occupying a space of retro cool in our culture, Special serves as both a lightning rod and catalyst, is this bold, or does it just look like it? out as a timely, genre-defining work. Once again, Lizzo, a perpetual underdog despite her success, reminds us how great she is with songs like “About Damn Time” and the title track threading Diana Ross, Euro disco, Stax Records warmth, 60s-era funk soundscapes, and Lizzo’s own distinct sensibilities into something that cannot be denied or imitated. Make no mistake: This is the soundtrack of this, and every other, summer.

With a title taken from a fantasy world created by singer Bea Kristi, the collection is choc-a-bloc with more dreamy, postSmashing Pumpkins indie pop goodness heard on Fake It Flowers. Here, Kristi doubles down on the 90s nostalgia, and incorporates pitch-perfect mimicry of the crackling production and fuzzy guitar effects heard on great releases by My Bloody Valentine and The Breeders. There’s a charm in her ability to keep the songs from sounding contrived, and the range and power of tracks like “Lovesong” and “Talk” remind the listener why Beabadoobee is breaking out at summer festivals, so we recommend checking out the band now before tickets sell out for future tour dates.

The groovy tom-drum pattern and strutting bassline of lead single, “Welcome to Hell,” perfectly set up the listener for what to expect. Brimming with 70s New York swagger, Black Midi takes us for a walk through Lou Reed-era punk, replete with descriptions of dirtbags that could work for 80s cocaine hustlers to modern politicians. The third album from the trio finds the band hitting its stride and is a can’t miss for anyone looking to scratch the itch left by Jawbreaker, Rancid, and, yes, The Velvet Underground. Put this on at a party you want to get started, but one you need to survive in case that cute someone across the room wants to talk late into the night.

Special

Releases July 15

Beatopia

Hellfire

Releases July 15

Beach Bunny

Viagra Boys

Superorganism

Delightful vocal caterwauling and the fizzy pop-punk backing of singer Lili Triffilio help the sophomore release from this Chicago group to make a fine splash. Songs like “Oxygen” and “Fire Escape” situate themselves in the space occupied by bands that red rovered between the bite of blink-182 and the beautiful sincerity of Helium or Velocity Girl. This record is for listeners who have found themselves standing at Illuminati Hotties shows and wondering what it would sound like if Sarah Tudzin started a supergroup with Aimee Mann and J Mascis. Give this a listen if you’re waiting for the real return of late-90s rock.

Kraftwerk has a meet-cute with post-surf rock punk on the new tunes offered up by the lads of Viagra Boys. Campy in the best possible way, intentionally dumb tracks like “Troglodyte” use the song-as-insult approach perfected by acts like The Ramones to bridge the gap between the influences of the band and the current era. Elsewhere, “Ain’t No Thief ” and other tracks invite the listener to dance all night to party-friendly beats that wouldn’t be out of place at a 90s rave. Timeless in a way that’s hard to capture, Cave World will make you want to get out your beetle boots, which are easier to dance in than your Doc Martens.

Releases July 22

Releases July 8

Four years after their self-titled debut, Superorganism are back with an electric set of eclectic, world-beat inspired jams. Stephen Malkmus, Dylan Cartlidge, Gen Hoshino, Chai, and Pi Ja Ma all make appearances, but it’s the core talent (now without certain problematic members) of the band that makes tracks like “On & On” sensational, addictive listens. The album, which explores the theme of the infinite versus the intimate, takes the listener on a truly gorgeous journey that is best experienced while wearing headphones in a room with the lights off at 2 a.m. Come for the ambiance, but stay for the brilliant sense of having been on a perfectly executed adventure you’ll feel after listening.

Emotional Creature

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Cave World

World Wide Pop

Releases July 15

Metal Meltdown Celebrating Fandom by Addison Herron-Wheeler

Pretty much everyone has a fandom. Whether yours is death metal, RuPaul’s Drag Race, the Marvel Multiverse, a Shonda Rhimes TV show, or a favorite football team, one of the great pleasures of life is finding a special form of escapism, a fun universe where you can be anything you want and forget about the world’s problems. Trust me, I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. The world can be insanely stressful and depressing, and without interests like these, things can seem really mundane. Having some healthy fandom interests means you are plugged in and connected to your community, and it also means you have a good outlet for fantasy and escape. But there are times when fandoms can go too far. For example, even when J.K. Rowling came out as transphobic, many fans continued to support her

and her stories and universe, despite her stance. The same thing happens in metal. Despite bands being known racists, sexists, or homophobes, people keep supporting them, claiming that the riffs and songwriting prowess make it worth it. While it makes sense that it’s upsetting when a fandom fails us in this way, it’s important to make sure that your passions and interests match your values. That way, you can feel good about everything you nerd out over and support, instead of having bad karma attached to your nerdy pleasures. It’s also equally as important to celebrate the fandoms that support queer folks, people of color, and other marginalized groups, When bands, sports figures, or other public creators go out of their way to acknowledge their privilege and alliances, it means a lot to the people who find comfort and entertainment in what they create.

And it’s also important not to gatekeep your awesome fandoms from others who may wish to learn about them. Too often, queer people and other marginalized groups have trouble breaking into their nerdy area of choice or finding people like them who share their interests because of all the gatekeeping in fandoms across the board. If you find something that makes you feel special, whether it’s extreme metal or glitter makeup palettes, welcome new enthusiasts to the fold and help them learn about your favorite escapist universe. All in all, fandoms are things that should be celebrated, but make sure you’re aligning yourself with fandoms that also celebrate you and give you a sense of love and belonging.

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Horoscopes July 2022 by Alanna L.P. Welcome to Alanna L.P.’s Uplifting Horoscopes. These are very general readings that will resonate with many but not all of you. That’s OK! Take away what makes sense, and leave what doesn’t behind. If you want a deeper understanding of what to expect this month, read your sun sign, your rising sign, and your moon sign. You can find what these are by going to cafeastrology.com to get a free birth chart reading.

Aries There’s so much to see and do with your loved ones this summer! Abundance is everywhere, and everything feels easy, breezy, and bright. If you’re seeking healing, it’ll be as easy to find as sunshine. Mantra: “I’m walking on sunshine, woooah, and don’t it feel good!” – “Walking on Sunshine,” Katrina and the Waves

Taurus Love is all around you, Taurus! This is going to be a summer of light and life! Take some time to do some financial planning to support all the excitement and adventure unfolding before you so that when things really take off, you’ll be ready to go. Mantra: Live, laugh, love

Gemini Suppression is not your friend and will destroy you, dear Gemini. Be open with yourself and others. Now is the time to turn your deepest secret into your strongest asset. Mantra: “Speak your truth even if your voice shakes.” – Unknown

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Cancer Happy birthday, July Cancers! This month is all about being the loveable nurturing, huggable individual that is uniquely you. Independence this summer will be the key to your happiness. You can’t make anyone happy until you make yourself happy, so do you, boo boo. Mantra: Love yourself first.

Leo Happy birthday, July Leos! Fun and excitement are waiting for you! Be good to yourself; spoil yourself rotten, and everyone else will follow. If you’re not getting the attention you think you deserve, let go, and let grow. Mantra: I know my worth.

Virgo It’s the right time to expand yourself professionally, Virgo. The workplace is where you’ll flourish. Go after your goals, and you will be supported! This could be the moment you’ve been waiting for. Mantra: I can, and I will.

Libra Time to grow up, Libra! If you’re stuck, it’s because issues from your childhood are still holding you back. You are not alone, and there will always be someone who loves you for who you are. Seek out professional help if these issues keep persisting. Mantra: Evolution to revolution

Scorpio Strike while the iron is hot! There’s an important relationship that is going to teach you just what you need to learn about love coming your way. Your new routines are paying off, so keep it up as you level up. Mantra: Life is getting better and better.

Sagittarius It feels good to break free from limiting situations, doesn’t it Sagittarius? Now you can see the big picture and make those big plans. Take some time for meaningful one-on-one with loved ones. Mantra: I’m going places.

Capricorn Whip out that confidence, Capricorn! It’s time to stack that cash. Be 100% clear on what you want; name it, and claim it! If the early part of July is bumpy with a partner, things will turn sweet as a strawberry by August if you commit to talking it out. Mantra: I deserve what I want.

Aquarius If life feels like it’s spinning out of control, it’s time to develop a routine that involves a good balance of work and play. An unexpected gift or two is coming your way that will make your day. Mantra: I love surprises!

Pisces You’re being called to build a nest this summer, Pisces. Whether it’s spending time with your loved ones or doing home improvements, you’ll find the most satisfaction at home. Writing will bring surprising satisfaction during this down time. You may be surprised just how much people want to hear what you have to say. Mantra: “Little by little, the bird makes its nest.” – French proverb

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OFM

BAR TAB | Colorado Nightlife

BLUSH & BLU

ICONS

1526 E. Colfax Ave. Denver (303) 484-8548 bluebludenver.com

3 E. Bijou St. Colorado Springs (719) 300-7863 Instagram- @icons_colorado

BOYZTOWN

LI’L DEVILS

WILD CORGI PUB

255 S. Broadway St. Denver (303) 733-1156 Facebook- @lildevilslounge

1223 E. 13th Ave. Denver (303) 832-7636 wildcorgipub.com

LIPSTICK DISCOTEQUE

CHARLIE DWELLINGTON’S 1103 N. 1st St. Grand Junction (970) 241-4010 charliedwellingtons.com

5660 W. Colfax Ave. Denver (720) 669-3470 Facebook- @lipstickdiscoteque

829 E. Colfax Ave. Denver (303) 832-2687 xbardenver.com

CHARLIE’S NIGHTCLUB

MILLERS & ROSSI

900 E. Colfax Ave. Denver (303) 839-8890 charliesdenver.com

3452 Walnut St. Denver (720) 257-5342 millersandrossi.com

#VYBE 1027 N. Broadway St. Denver (720) 573-8886 303vybe.com

776 N. Lincoln St. Denver (720) 598-5648 denversweet.com TUE: Solve That Puzzle 7p-9p w/$5 House Margs WED: Music Bingo 7p-9p w/$4 U Call It At The Bar THU: Karaoke 9p-1a w/BOGO well & drafts to 7p

16 T

ST .M

PA R

AH AP

AV E

TRI A N GL E 17TH AVE.

. ST

31ST AVE.

T H A M B U RGE R M A RY’S

STO N E Y'S X BA R

COLFAX AVE.

TI GH T EN D

OGDEN ST.

CLARKSON ST.

WASHINGTON ST.

1ST AVE. L I ’ L D EV I LS

BROADWAY

BOYZTOW N

PENNSYLVANIA

8TH AVE. DE N VE R 6TH AVE. SW E ET

TRADE

WILD CO RGI

11TH AVE.

B LUS H & B LU

R + R DE N VE R

C H AR L I E ’S

V YB E

YORK ST.

C LO C KTOW E R

THE TRIANGLE BAR 2036 N. Broadway St. Denver (303) 658-0913 triangledenver.com

U LN AR

VD BL

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M I L L E RS & ROSS I

TRAC KS

1336 E. 17th Ave. Denver (303) 993-5812 hamburgermarys.com/denver

TRADE 475 Santa Fe Dr. Denver (720) 627-5905 Facebook- @tradedenver

. ST

HAMBURGER MARY’S

TRACKS 3500 Walnut St. Denver (303) 836-7326 tracksdenver.com

SANTA FE DR. KALAMATH ST.

FUSIONS BAR & GRILL 3053 Brighton Blvd. Denver (303) 862-7376 Facebook- @fusionsbardenver

TIGHT END BAR 1501 E. Colfax Ave. (303) 861-9103 tightendbar.com

VD BL

4501 E. Virginia Ave. Glendale (303) 388-8889 Facebook- @elpotreroclub

COLORADO BLVD.

EL POTRERO

F US I O N S

4958 E. Colfax Ave. Denver (303) 320-9337 Facebook- @randrdenver

BROADWAY

SUN: Beer Bust 4p-8p & Showbears 7p-10p

R&R LOUNGE

DOWNING ST.

DENVER SWEET

X BAR

DOWNING ST.

117 Broadway St. Denver (303) 722-7373 boyztowndenver.com

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o ar rid sG Ju liu by ot o Ph

by Alex Burnel

The Mighty Kinky Helmet

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hen I wear this helmet, I feel I can be anyone I want. I can be the jock on the football team, the leather-wearing bad boy, the superhero that saves the day. When I wear this helmet, I’m filled with a sense of power and excitement that courses through my veins. I feel like the most masculine man in the room, even if I’m not sporting the biggest muscles. When I walk through this door, I’ll be entering my first kinky fandom experience. This person walked up to me at Comic-Con last week and handed me a card, with an address and the words that read: “Enjoy comic-cons? Possibly have a kinky side? Come to where these two worlds collide!” I read this on the card as the beautiful Catwoman grabbed my hand and pulled it up to her face, leaning intimately toward me. She proceeded to remove my Power Ranger glove and sucked on one of my fingers. My jaw dropped, and shivers coursed over my whole body. She whispered a date and time by the side of my helmet, and as she stepped back, she said, “I hope to see you there, Red Ranger” I opened the door and walked in slowly. As I looked around, I saw a sea of cosplayers alongside a bunch of furries and pups, even individuals dressed in leather and harnesses. I also quickly noticed I was a little overdressed. I noticed there was a clothing check-in a few feet away from where I entered, and I wanted to take full advantage. I started walking toward the check-in and felt a hand lay upon my shoulder. I heard the words, “I’m so glad you came.” I turned around and saw that same beautiful Catwoman. This time, they were wearing thigh-high boots, a thong, and a set of pasties in the shape of kitty paws in addition to the mask. Miss Kitty helped me remove my spandex costume and told me to leave the helmet, gloves, and boots on.

They walked around with me, introduced me to a bunch of people, and all of a sudden, there he was: a gorgeous man with a beautiful hairy chest and long flowy hair. He was holding a trident and wearing green knee-high boots and greennetted trunks that completely displayed his massive shaft. He was also wearing a gold harness with a ring and chain that connected to another ring around his cock and balls. I noticed my new kitty friend was now leading me directly toward this extremely sexy Aquaman. I asked Miss Kitty where we were going, and they told me, “I see you can’t take your eyes off him.” They happened to know him. I told them I have no idea what to even say to him. They told me, “Perfect,” and that I could thank them later. Mr. Aqua looked me up and down as he said, “Well hello there, Kitty. Who’s your friend?” She told him my name. “The Red Ranger really wanted to meet you,” she purred. Before I could glare at Kitty, Mr. Aqua walked closer to me and said it was his pleasure. He never looked away from me and asked Miss Kitty,”Is the room open?” I had no idea what room he was talking about, but Kitty said, “Follow me.” Kitty opened a door, and we walked down a hall to a room with a mattress in the center of the room and kinky tools hung up around the walls. Mr. Aqua walked up to me and said, “Well, Red Ranger, are you up for some fun?” “Very much so,” I answered, as he motioned for me to lay down on the bed. I was told if I ever want to stop, I just need to say so. I started to take my helmet off, and he interrupted, “Stop. Keep it on, but take your gloves and boots off.” Mr. Aqua handcuffed my arms to the bed and asked, “Was this underwear expensive?” I told him no, and he replied, “Good.” He held my legs up and ripped a hole open over my asshole. He straddled me, leaned in close, took a deep whiff of my chest hair, and then took multiple, deeper whiffs of my armpits. During all of this, Kitty was sitting on the chair in the corner and playing with themself while they watched.

Mr. Aqua took off his boots and underwear, proceeding to bury his face in my ass for the best rimming I’ve ever had. He quickly put a condom on while he started stroking and asked Kitty to hand him the lube. They passed him the lube, then they grabbed a candle. “Do you want to experience something rather … different? And exciting?” she asked. I agreed, and she started to dip wax onto my chest. It was so intense and also so erotic! I was getting so turned on, and Kitty removed the rest of their clothes, sat back in their chair and started masturbating with the dildo next to the chair. This sexy Aquaman was now fully hard and started to apply lube to my hole. I can’t believe they still havent seen my face because of my helmet, and they don’t seem to care. He slid in slow at first and yelled out, “Fuck yeah!” Once his massive cock was fully inside me, he picked up speed. Without losing any sense of pace, he reached down and pinched my nipples lightly. He seemed to really like it, and I did too. He thrusted harder and harder. I couldn’t even touch myself, but it didn’t matter—He was really hitting the right spot, and my cock was also rock hard. He came so hard, pulled out slow, gazed at my gaping hole, and teased it a little before sliding back in. He told me he wanted to keep going and help me get off. He started to pick up pace again. Before he could start to jerk me off while he thrusted, he started to go faster and harder again. I could tell he was about to cum again, and suddenly I couldn’t hold back. I came even without being touched, which was so damn hot! Right as I came, he couldn’t hold back anymore either and came again. He slid out and took off his condom and kept jerking onto my chest. As we both came, I heard Miss Kitty also cum from pleasuring themself. Everything was so hot, and I was so happy the beautiful Catwoman gave me that card. The Mr. Aqua hottie asked if I was planning on coming to their next getogether. I said, “I can’t wait for the next time!” Maybe the Red Ranger will make a reappearance, or I’ll possibly join the DC Universe; either way it’s going to be hot!

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