Democrats win local elections
Hadley Amato Assistant News Editor
On Tuesday, Nov. 4, people across the Town and City of Poughkeepsie took to the polls to cast their ballots in local elections. By the end of the day, county Democrats had pulled off a clear and resounding victory. The Dutchess County Legislature flipped to Democratic control, and both the City Council and Town Board of Poughkeepsie expanded their Democratic majorities.
According to Rebecca Edwards and Daniel Atonna, two Democrats who won their respective races, key issues in this election cycle included environmental protections, walkability/bikeability, affordability, housing, food security, replacing lead pipes, slowing down speeding cars and repaving roads.
Edwards, who has served as Poughkeepsie’s Town Supervisor since 2023 and is on leave from her role as Vassar Professor of History on the Eloise Ellery Chair, spoke about what her priorities will be now that she has been re-elected. “One of my highest priorities is to build stronger ties between the Town of Poughkeepsie and the City of Poughkeepsie and to try to work together as much as we can,” she told The
Vassar College’s student newspaper of record since 1866
Registrar launches Course Match
ThisAlger Contributing Editor
semester, Vassar College’s Registrar Office introduced Course Match, a new course registration system software, to the entire student body. Run through the company Cognomos, Course Match replaces the home-grown system created by a former student that has been in use for years. The new registration system comes through an overhaul of the College’s Student Information System (SIS) that began in earnest in 2022. The SIS system is primarily made up of AskBanner, a Banner platform provided through Ellucian, although the registration system is not through the same software.
In a conversation with The Miscellany News, Registrar Angela Anderson explained that when the College’s contract
with Ellucian was up for renewal, the school decided to reevaluate the system. Between September 2022 and February 2023, Huron Consulting met with focus groups of employees and students to determine whether the SIS environment was meeting the College’s needs. The Banner system has been used since 1995; according to Anderson, the survey found that the Vassar community was happy with the system, although it needed updating. AskBanner, the current platform, will be phased out and replaced with a new Banner system called MyVassar by January 2027.
Anderson explained that the slow transition to MyVassar needed an accompanying updated registration software. She noted that the drive to replace the current registration system was partly fueled by the desire to move its operations to the cloud, making it more secure and flexi-
ble. In addition, because the system was not run through a parent company, only a few people knew how to update and fix it. “We were just really relying on Vassar knowledge completely if something were to go wrong,” Anderson remarked. The old system also lacked features the Registrar’s Office wanted to implement, like giving students preference for classes within their major and receiving statistics on how many people got their top classes.
The key factor in selecting a registration software was that the Registrar’s Office did not want a “first come, first serve” system, which make up most of the options on the market. Anderson said the Cognomos team was very helpful in making adjustments to the system. “We don’t want technology to drive our decisions. We want it to help us with decisions. But we want to be
See Courses on page 3 See Elections on page 4

‘The Wolves’ dazzles in student production
Luke Jenkins Senior Editor
Thispast weekend, tufted titmice, Maroon Five’s “Animals” and tear-stained orange slices graced the makeshift stage for a production of “The Wolves”—a Pulitzer Prize-nominated play written by Sarah DeLappe—in the multi-purpose room of the Athletic Fitness Center (AFC). The work came back to campus after being originally presented at the Powerhouse Theater nearly a decade ago.
The play itself focuses on the events and relationships developing over the course of a girl’s soccer team’s indoor season. No topic of discussion was off the table for the 16and 17-year-olds, and all the conversations, whether seriously political or seriously soccer-related, were mixed together. The resulting symphony is one to remember. In fact, this musical metaphor came up in a conversation with one of the play’s actors: “It has such a musical rhythm,” stated Miranda Henry ’27, who portrayed the player with the jersey #7.
All of the conversations happening at once made the play a difficult task for the cast. At times, the script features three columns of dialogue occurring simultaneously. “When we first learned our lines, we were all learning the single conversation we were in, and then we kind of quickly re -
Grace Finke reports on the magic of “Music on the Bridge.”
alized we had to learn everyone’s conversation,” shared Noe Perry-Greene ’26. Laura Weiss ’26 put it this way: “It was a beast to memorize.” However, the pace of the show is part of its appeal. Weiss continued, “It was really important because the flow of it is kind of what makes it good.”
Us viewers were seated on rows of mats and chairs on either side of the multi-purpose room. The unconventional setup transformed the space; I hardly recognized where I had long ago sweated through a morning Pilates class, and good riddance! The windows were covered by red mats, and the net of a makeshift goal was made up of string lights. When it lit up, you better believe I was giddy.
Throughout the runtime, the cast performed stretches, ran drills and huddled up right next to the audience. The constant movement made the production even harder for the actors. Nora Guzikowski ’27, who directed alongside Maria Shansonga ’27, said, “This was an exercise in fitness and conditioning.” The play’s climax is also an emotional rollercoaster, adding another layer of difficulty.
As far as Guzikowski knows, no other play in recent memory has used the AFC as a performance space. The novelty made the production exciting. “How the heck is this going to work?” I thought to myself as I walked inside the building.

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When cast members ran through a door on the opposite side of the room, I had no genuine clue what the backstage looked like. Avery Epstein ’28, who played the goalkeeper, swooped in to answer my question: “We’re just on a landing at the top of a staircase.” The magic of theater, dare I say. With a total budget of $75 to put on the show, it was impressive what the crew was able to put together in terms of costumes and set design. The squad was decked out in jerseys, and there was even some flashy protective soccer headgear.
Being able to see the audience lined up across from me was another highlight. Harriet Simons ’27 remarked, “I felt very part of the team.” There was never a dull moment for me. I spent half of the 90 minutes either giggling at a quip from the stage or laughing at the reactions of the viewers across from me.
For Shansonga, this proximity makes for rewarding shows: “Having fun with [the audience] and playing off them, those shows to me are the most fulfilling.” Ina Zaslavsky ’27 got wrapped up in some of the dialogue: “They have a line, ‘You witch,’ and I was pointed at in the audience.” She added, “But all in all, it was great to see my friends in their element and I thought the play was really impactful.” I agreed with Zaslavsky about the pro-
See ‘WOLVES’ on page 5
Ben Kaplan explains how running helped him re-discover himself.

Celebrating tree stories
On your walk to your classes or the Gordon Commons, you may have noticed a large wooden board leaning against the wall. There is a long brown cardboard pole, of sorts, reaching up to the top. Around this pole, there are some specks of red, yellow and orange, and as you pass by, you may notice pictures of what might be trees on pieces of paper stapled onto the board. You give it a moment before realizing, “Hey, that was a tree!”
The Vassar Arboretum, in collaboration with the Office of Sustainability and the Environmental Studies program, is celebrating the Centennial of the Vassar Arboretum. These boards are up until Thanksgiving break and placed in Gordon Commons, the Winston Evans Bridge for Laboratory Sciences, across from Retreat and in the Athletics and Fitness Center. In an effort to cultivate gratitude and awareness around the extensive amount of nature that lies on campus, this celebration of 100 years of the Arboretum encourages students to write down anything the trees remind them of. On these boards, you
See Stories on page 7
Read Julian Balsley’s reflection on finding his love for baseball again while at college.


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Carina Cole
Allison Lowe
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Luke Jenkins
Soren Fischer
Clara Alger
Julian Balsley
Emma Brown
Hadley Amato
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Grace Finke
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Julia Weber
New course registration system introduced
Continued from Courses on page 1 able to say this is the way Vassar does it, we hold strong to these values, this is the way we want it done,” Anderson said.
In 2024, the Registrar’s Office did a full test of the Course Match system with fake data. This summer, the Office was able to test out the new system on the incoming Class of 2029, as they were a much smaller and less complex group than the whole college population. 82 percent of students got their “favorite” class, 95 percent got at least one of their top two and 99 percent got at least one of their top three classes. With the implementation of this new system, Anderson said, “Our overall goal is for students to be more satisfied with the selections coming out of Course Match, and then hopefully reduce the number of changes that need to be done during phase two.”
Despite this early statistical success, many students have expressed frustration with the new system. History major Bekir Hodzic ’26 said he missed the fact that with the old system you could see the number of people also registering for the class. This data would tell you the popularity of the class, and Hodzic says would inform how he ranked his classes. “Sometimes when
you add nuance and complications to a system, it makes it worse,” he said. Ben Savel ’26 added, “There is no transparency about how the algorithm works.”
Anderson expected that this may be a primary worry for students, but noted that it was an intentional change. “What we’ve tried to tell students is that Course Match is best when you go off what [are] your own preferences, like the courses that you want to take. And we know that seeing those numbers could sway a student one way or another from adding a course or not adding a course,” Anderson said.
Students have also been frustrated with the fact that the system requires you to list seven or more classes. Biology major Madi Quayle ’27 said they have been left listing classes they have no intention of taking. Upperclassmen especially often have a very specific and limited schedule they need to graduate. International Studies major Ailynn O’Neill ’26 also felt frustrated with the mock schedules option, nervous about the fact that they show schedule options with barely any of the classes she needs. Yet Natalie Buzzell ’26 also reflected that, “I think at Vassar, generally, and this might be different for people in STEM classes, but if you really need to get into a class, a pro-
fessor will often understand that and work with you to make it happen.”
Biochemistry major Anoushka Bhatt ’26 said that for a lot of Science, Technology, Engineering and Math majors in higher level courses, there are internal lottery systems for registration, so she already knows what classes she can take. She has experienced trouble with getting into a 200-level course before, but says, “I wonder if the lottery system is the issue and not actually the pre-reg system for us.”
Professor of Physics on the Ethel and Alexander Klemin Chair in Physics Brian Daly served as the Interim Dean of Faculty during the 2024-2025 academic year as the preparation for the Course Match launch ramped up. Though in support of the Course Match as an equitable option for a registration software update, he sees how placing classes in categories rather than rankings can be confusing. He remarked on the fact that students and advisors would benefit from taking advantage of the fact that you can regroup your classes and then run the algorithm again, saying, “Hopefully people will go watch the little tutorials and see that potentially [Course Match] is powerful, right? To be able to see, here’s your most likely schedule, and if you
hate it, you go and do it again.”
Other students noted positive changes with Course Match. Neuroscience major Sophia Sklar ’26 commented, “I like the fact that there are no more lottery numbers because that would stress a lot of people out.” She also liked that the ranking includes different levels of preference. Students also generally noted that the new system is much more aesthetically streamlined and pleasing.
Grace Durgin ’28 said she likes the idea that the system will make things easier, but that we are just not there yet. “It sort of, at least now, is making everything a bit more difficult, because everyone has to figure out this new system,” she said. Along with Bhatt and Sklar, she acknowledges that we are still in the middle of the process, and students will have to wait and see what happens.
Anderson responded to this concern, saying, “I think that was probably the biggest challenge, was just trying to not overwhelm people, but yet make sure somehow they had the information they needed to use the tool.” She continued, “I don’t think we’re there yet. We really, really are hopeful that the results coming out of Course Match will be positive for students.”
Feldstein lectures on AI, advanced tech authoritarianism
On Thursday, Nov. 13, Vassar College students and professors gathered in Rockefeller Hall to listen to guest speaker Steve Feldstein’s lecture, “The Coercive Power of Tech: From AI Surveillance to Drones.”
This talk was organized in tandem with Vassar Visiting Assistant Professor of Political Science Chibuzo Achinivu’s seminar course POLI 381: “Digital Authoritarianism,” which surveys the repressive and autocratic uses of technology around the globe.
Feldstein drew on his expertise as a former employee of the State Department, lawyer and researcher to elaborate on topics discussed in Achinivu’s class. The lecture mainly focused on the tech race against China, collaboration between tech companies and the military industrial complex as well as the use of artificial intelligence (AI) for authoritarian means.
Achinivu began the talk with a brief introduction to some of the topics discussed in his course: “Over the course of the past several weeks, my students and I have come to grips with the dynamic that digital information technologies, once heralded as liberation technologies, have been co-opted by actors from democracies and autocracies alike for repressive motives. We’ve also grappled with the idea, or the question, [of] if technology is neutral—that is, does it influence politics or do political actors influence it?”
Before the lecture, Feldstein visited Achinivu’s class to answer questions about his work and his various career paths. His book “The Rise of Digital Repression” is the first text read in the course, followed by several of Feldstein’s more recent articles. In an interview with The Miscellany News prior to the event, Achinivu expressed his hopes that students would take advantage of Feldstein’s broad expertise: “He’s going to have a great wealth of knowledge for them and expertise on going into these fields [political science and law].”
According to Achinivu, Feldstein is a very experienced lecturer, with a background in teaching as well as public speaking thanks to his legal experience. In addition, his time as an employee of the State Department lends him valuable hands-on experience on the topics that Vassar students are studying from a scholarly perspective.
As the lecture got underway, Feldstein lid out some of the fundamental messages that he hoped to explain through his talk. “The general overall argument I’m going to make is that advanced technologies serve as a key measure of power both internally and externally,” he began. “Digital tools offer leaders new ways to suppress challengers and hold onto power.”
To illustrate these points, Feldstein jumped into a series of examples illustrating the geopolitical implications of the drive to develop increasingly advanced technology, a phenomenon he referred to as the “Tech Race.”
Comparing it to the Cold War era “Space Race” between the United States and the Soviet Union, Feldstein pointed out several ways that the diffusion of tools such as drones, spyware, phone apps and AI are empowering regimes both domestically and externally. However, he pointed out how the increased globalization and digital interconnectedness that has come about since the Cold War means that more international actors are gaining access to these strategies than ever before.
Feldstein proceeded to discuss the United States’ past strategies of combatting the spread of potentially dangerous technologies.
He compared the protective technology policies of the Biden administration to the deregulation-focused ideology of the Trump era, a movement which he referred to as the rise of the “Tech Right.” According to Feldstein, his new approach to the Tech Race places diminished importance on keeping powerful technological advances out of the hands of enemies such as China and Russia in favor of freeing up the market, the assumption being that the United
States will maintain its advantage naturally.
With the political groundwork laid, Feldstein moved into several specific examples of Big Tech having a direct impact on global conflicts. He explained how the use of drones in Russia and Ukraine has drawn scrutiny from those concerned about the cost of civilian life for the use of destructive technologies on the battlefield, and the recent drive to incorporate AI autonomy into their targeting programs further complicates the issue.
He later cited similar events in Israel, including the recent mass surveillance of Palestinians using software developed by Microsoft. Feldstein especially emphasized the implications of civilian technology companies partnering with national militaries and the extent to which these companies can claim ignorance of how their products are used.
After laying out the capabilities of technology to heighten the costs of war, both by ways of money spent and civilian lives lost, Feldstein shifted into discussing some potential options for leaders interested in managing the consequences. He stressed the importance of establishing clear technology control strategies in pace with the speed of innovation. These rules, according to Feldstein, should be based on the input of experts in emerging military technologies, not just the interests of the state. Norms for the use of AI weapons must be established and respected, just like all other basic principles of war.
From here, Feldstein transitioned from conflict to repression, beginning with a survey of the most and least digitally repressed countries in the world. The highest offenders—North Korea, Turkmenistan, Russia, South Sudan and China—earned their positions on this list by using technology to spy on their citizens, identify and repress dissidents and distribute targeted propaganda. To illustrate these points, Feldstein spoke on the use of AI facial recognition technology to track down political rebels in Russia, a practice that, he explained, not only infringes on citizen
privacy, but only yields partial accuracy in correct identification.
Finally, Feldstein summed up his points by emphasizing that the rapid development of technology should always be assessed in the context of how they are used. “Fighting back requires new creative strategies and innovative approaches,” he said, referring to efforts we can take against misuse of tech like AI and drones, “but we also have to remember that these authoritarian regimes are difficult to deal with because ultimately it’s a matter of political survival.”
Ian Watanabe ’27, [Disclaimer: Watanabe is Assistant Opinions Editor for The Miscellany News] a Political Science major at Vassar and a student in Achinivu’s class, offered his perspective on the lecture.“I’m really glad we had this talk,” he said, reflecting on Feldstein’s unique insight into the topic. “Having people who have had on-the-job experience is something that I’d like to see a lot more of, and I think people would be interested in that.”
He discussed how Feldstein’s lecture model touched on a lot of the same key points that the class does, but while the class focuses very heavily on China and the United States, the lecture expanded the worldview to include more locations, including democratic countries.
For students like Watanabe, who are interested in political science topics such as technology and rhetoric, the interest in lecture events like Feldstein’s stems from a desire to envision careers in their areas of study.
Achinivu agreed that Feldstein’s experience in these topics would be of great help in answering many of the questions students consider in his class, including how technology can be misused by governments and what we can do to stop it. As he said in his introduction, “These questions and their answers have implications for freedom, human rights, national security, sovereignty and interstate warfare, and not many have had access to the relevant officials, nor have they given us insights as deep, as our speaker today, Mr. Steve Feldstein.”
Dutchess County shifts blue in recent elections
Continued from Elections on page 1
Miscellany News
She also stressed future plans for creating more equitable infrastructure for both the City and the Town. “We share a joint water plant and we share a joint sewer plant. So some of the infrastructure issues around water, sewer or highway are all things that we need to be working together on as best we can. There’s potentially mutual grant writing and things of that sort of stuff that we could do,” Edwards said.
Furthermore, Edwards hopes to change the two arterials that run east and west across both the Town and City. “Those arterials really are dangerous and they cut through the city and the town in ways that enable people to speed through at 50 miles an hour, but they don’t necessarily help us develop the kind of community we want,” she asserted.
Amritha Dewan ’28, a Seattle, Washington, native and Poughkeepsie voter, expressed support for Edwards’ plans to tackle the arterials. “I think that would be great. I’ve crossed the east–west arterial on foot a number of times myself, and it’s definitely a very high speed road to be crossing on foot.” She continued, “I’ve crossed that street before when the pedestrian lights haven’t changed or worked, so I think some change there would be a great addition to Poughkeepsie.”
Atonna, who ousted Republican Austin Mora to represent Ward Eight on Poughkeepsie’s Common Council, cited lead pipes and affordability as central to his constituents. “I plan to engage people around these fights [in] replacing lead pipes and making sure that we minimize the costs that homeowners need to pay to get their lead pipes replaced,” Atonna told The Miscellany News. “We’re going to be
engaging people to fight to restore rent stabilization in Poughkeepsie, and [we are] already working on launching a campaign on the county-wide level, around pushing the Dutchess County Legislature to make all the buses in the county fare-free.”
Reflecting on the significance of the overall Democratic victories across the Hudson Valley, Atonna said, “I think when Democrats deliver for working-class people, that’s when they can actually see those working class people come out and vote for them.” Regarding his electoral success, Atonna explained, “[People] want to see the housing crisis be addressed, and they broadly support my efforts to push to restore rent stabilization here in Poughkeepsie, and expand tenant protections.”
Edwards similarly acknowledged how local politics can enact crucial, direct change in communities. “The scale of politics is more human at this level,” she commented. “I also think that [in the national discourse] people have gotten very cynical about politics because they just think it’s a lot of words, and the words don’t mean anything.” She expanded, “In this environment, people don’t believe in words anymore. They want action. And at the local level there are particular ways in which you can try to get that done.”
Considering the importance of local politics, Dewan stated: “I think it’s really important to engage in local politics, and it’s not usually given as much importance and significance as national or even state-level politics, but big change starts small.” She added, “It makes a lot of sense that the hyper-local level is where that change is beginning to take place and also where that change will be felt by the most constituents.”
Lucy Gaffneyboro ’27, a member of Vas-
sar Votes and a registered Poughkeepsie voter, also voiced her opinion on the importance of local elections. “I think that we don’t see such high turnout levels at local elections, but I think that good local turnout leads to change that is more secure. And I think that’s incredibly important… At a local level when there is a democratic supermajority, there is a lot we can accomplish to protect individuals [who] may not be federally protected.”
Atonna expressed that the results of the elections were inseparable from the Trump administration’s increasingly farright rhetoric and policy. “[The election] tells a story that people are really getting sick of what’s going on in D.C. with Donald Trump and MAGA and their extremism, and people want to see an agenda that’s actually fighting for working-class people,” Atonna commented.
He highlighted the 2025 election cycle’s results as an indication of how Democrats should shape their future policies. He argued, “[Democrats] need to have a clear economically populist agenda and run authentic candidates who are not taking corporate money and billionaire money… If you want a winning formula, there it is.”
Gaffneyboro expressed agreement when told about Atonna’s sentiment. “I really [agree]... Accepting money from these billionaires to run a campaign, it kind of feels oxymoronic to be like ‘I’m fighting for the working class, but I’m taking money from billionaires to make it happen’—they will always be indebted to those people [billionaires],” Gaffneyboro said.
For Atonna, the elections gave hope for what he argued could be the beginning of a larger movement towards more progressive politics in the Hudson Valley. “Democrats just took the majority in the legisla-
ture for the first time since 2009... I think that if they deliver for voters, they’re going to hold it, and I think that we’re going to see a lot more victories here in Dutchess County in terms of progressive legislation,” he concluded.
Dewan also contextualized, “I think it’s a pattern that we’ve seen a lot in the past, that really exciting progressive Democratic candidates brought on a very appealing platform, and then very little to none of [those] things come to life once they’re actually elected, and they are absorbed into the wider liberal Democrat politics.”
She expanded on what she feels voters can do to prevent this from happening. “I think at a personal level what I can do and what we can do at Vassar, everyone that’s registered to vote in Dutchess County cannot limit their participation in politics just to the election, but can email and call and continue to demand of our politicians what they’ve promised to us,” Dewan argued. Atonna expressed a similar sentiment: “The Hudson Valley is really changing. It’s getting a lot bluer, a lot more Democratic, but none of that is guaranteed. It’s on Democrats to actually deliver and fight for their constituents.”
Because of a recent change to New York State election laws, the candidates who were elected on Nov. 4, 2025 will be up for re-election again next November of 2026. Rather than having a usual two-year term, they will only have one year to hold power before running for re-election. Edwards commented on this added challenge: “[It’s] a little tiring, a little daunting, but I do think it’s good to be out there constantly and making sure you’re listening to everybody.” She concluded, “It’s hard to deliver a lot in six months before we start campaigning again, but we’ll keep trying.”

‘The Wolves’ returns as impressive student production in AFC
Continued from ‘Wolves’ on page 1
duction’s impact. It was able to deftly capture the essence of teen girl conversation and team dynamics. The dialogue was wide-ranging, fast-paced and authentically funny—a hard thing to pull off. Bitter rivalries simmered and friendships were tested. The cast pursued each character’s personality ambitiously; everyone was committed. Perry-Greene debuted a shaved
head for the show. The payoffs of this were particularly strong; I felt invested and in it Every conversation felt close.
But I also left with questions about the script’s choices: Was it necessary to have such a grief-filled turn in the play’s final moments? The ending gives us a powerful monologue from a soccer mom, played by Harper Navin ’26, but the twist felt unnecessary when I was already invested in the


plotlines developing. It felt a bit too out of left field to develop the teammates’ relationships in a way that felt true to life. And “The Wolves” at its best was strikingly faithful to reality.
Reflecting on the final product, Guzikowski recalled what it felt like to have it come together in the final week of rehearsals. After taking notes on a laptop during those rehearsals, she emphasized, “The
opening night was magical because I got to shut my laptop and just watch and take in all of the hard work that everyone had done.”
Before bestowing thanks on a talented production team, Guzikowski added, “I feel like there’s never gonna be another time where if I want to, I can just put up a play.” And I am so glad this one happened while I was a student here.
How del Toro tells a Freudian story in ‘Frankenstein’
Eli
Lerdau Guest Columnist
This past weekend saw the release of Guillermo del Toro’s adaptation of Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein,” published initially in 1818 and again in redacted form in 1831. Shelley wrote the original short story, which would eventually turn into the book, while locked in a house during a blizzard with her father—philosopher William Godwin, the father of anarchism—and her future husband, the poet Percy Shelley, among others. The group decided to amuse themselves with a writing competition, and while Mary slept, she dreamt of a man creating life. Following this dream, she began “Frankenstein,” and, in doing so, invented the genre of science fiction. A work that is such a central piece of the Western canon is bound to spawn countless remakes and types of analysis. Del Toro follows a long legacy of directors
Del Toro’s “Frankenstein” is a radical take on Shelley’s masterpiece, both in how the movie carries the story and in the themes it imparts on the viewer.
who have adapted “Frankenstein” for the screen, but he brings his own brilliant, odd but nonetheless incredible eye to Shelley’s book.
Del Toro’s “Frankenstein” is a radical take on Shelley’s masterpiece, both in how the movie carries the story and in the themes it imparts on the viewer. In Shelley’s “Frankenstein,” a young Victor Frankenstein experiences the loss of his mother due to scarlet fever and is forever broken. He seeks to create life from the grief of his mother’s death. Del Toro acknowledges this, but
takes a different road for the mother-son relationship.
In del Toro’s “Frankenstein,” Victor’s mother is played by Mia Goth, who also plays his love interest, Elizabeth. As the mother, she is killed not by scarlet fever, but by childbirth, impressing the death upon Victor quite literally with her bloodstained hand on his shoulder. We also witness a deep conflict between young Frankenstein and his father, as Victor despises him and views him as the true cause of his mother’s death. The influence of Sigmund Freud’s Oedipus complex on del Toro’s retelling becomes apparent.
The Oedipus complex emerged with Austrian neurologist Freud, who believed that as children reach the phallic stage of development, the male infant’s desire is focused on the genital area. Rather than emerging as a sexual desire, it is a sense of curiosity towards the genital area, which results in the development of gender and its associated societal rules and dispositions. During this process, the infant begins to, within his subconscious, develop a sense of sexual connection towards the mother and, in turn, a sense of dislike towards the father, whom he sees as competition for the mother.
This competition manifests itself both as hatred and anxiety. In del Toro’s “Frankenstein,” Victor is close with his mother and already hates his father, even before her death. After her death, his hatred only grows, and his interactions with his father, already having been dominated by anger and anxiety, become clearly hostile. Victor’s eyes shake and his face grows taut when they are together, and discussions of his father quickly grow negative. This notwithstanding, del Toro’s casting of the same actor for both Victor’s love interest and for his mother solidifies the Freudian message.
With these choices, del Toro has shown us that Victor’s childhood is emblematic of
Freudian theory, but how far does he carry this perspective? The most classic Freudian undertone within the original novel, and one that is present in all versions of the story, is the underlying sexual politics. Freud believed that repressed sexuality was the principal problem within our society and the driving force behind much of societal function. In “Civilization and its Discontents,” Freud argues that societal growth is pushed by the redirection and repression of two subconscious feelings: the Eros, the drive of love and sexual desire, and Thanatos, the drive of death. Throughout the text of Shelley’s “Frankenstein,” there is underlying tension between Victor and his friend Henry Clerval; Victor describes, “I grasped his [Clerval’s] hand, and in a moment forgot my horror and misfortune.”
The two also live together for months on end in a domestic setting, with Clerval nursing Victor back to health after his monster is created. This relationship is suppressed; Victor does not realize his love for Clerval, and it turns into a drive for Victor. He molds the creature as a male body, which Victor describes as selected for beauty. Freud believed that the subconscious is the driver of societal growth, and this extends into technology and science through Victor’s experiments.
The final Freudian element within this story, in both the movie and text, is that of projection. Freud argues that projection involves taking thoughts, motivations, desires and feelings that cannot be internally accepted and externalizing them onto something or someone in the outside world. Victor is a mad scientist who creates a projection to accomplish what he cannot: to overpower God as the creator of new life. Victor’s creation, however, goes horribly wrong, destroying him and all those around him, suggesting unrestricted projection as inherently destructive.
We are taught to fear not only the creature, but the man that made him and the
drivers of that man: unbridled ambition, usurping God and the unfettered pursuit of technological power. Victor projects his violent fantasies onto him, just as we project ours onto modern mixtures of techne and natura. We fear the creature, not just be -
We fear the creature, not just because of his violence, but because of what he represents. He represents mankind in a raw way, not shown through the filters of society. He is a Freudian projection of unconscious fears onto and into reality.
cause of his violence, but because of what he represents. He represents mankind in a raw way, not shown through the filters of society. He is a Freudian projection of unconscious fears onto and into reality.
Del Toro pulls no punches with his Freudian imagery, embracing ideas already present in the story of Victor Frankenstein and his creature. Mary Shelley, although writing decades before Freud, wrote a story that contained deep undertones. Though Freud is criticized today—and many of those criticisms are valid—his lens provides a powerful analytical tool. The Oedipus complex is undoubtedly incorrect, but the lens of male violence predicated on an unfair desire for women contains a grain of validity. There is perhaps a point to be had that repressed feelings, whether sexual or not, may drive our society.
Del Toro is not saying all of Freud is true, but he acknowledges its value while amplifying Shelley’s brilliant social commentary on science and man’s ambition.
Music students present contemporary repertoire at the Bridge
Grace Finke Assistant Arts Editor
On Thursday, Nov. 13, as I was making my daily trek through the Winton Evans Bridge for Laboratory Sciences—commonly referred to as the Bridge—I decided to stop in the atrium to see my peers perform. The Bridge was buzzing, filled with students who had just finished class and customers waiting for their daily matcha at The Brew, as music students set up for “Music on the Bridge.”
“Music on the Bridge” is a concert series that happens every semester with members of the Vassar College Chamber Music Program preparing short programs for friends, faculty and other passersby in the Bridge.
The Chamber Music Program, led by Senior Lecturer in Music and Director of Orchestral Activities Eduardo Navega, is an opportunity for student classical musicians to be placed in small ensembles and learn new repertoire. Students audition for the program at the beginning of the semester, and Navega places them in groups based on their experience. The groups play at a variety of different campus events, culminating in a recital that all groups perform in at the end of the semester.
Every Thursday in November and April, students from the Chamber Music Program participate in “Music on the Bridge.” Navega stated that this concert series has been a tradition since the Bridge was completed in 2016. “Because this is just next door to Skinner Hall, we decided to make our mark in this building,” Navega explained. “This, for them, is very important because they have an opportunity to perform in front of people in preparation for our final recital of the semester.”
This semester, the Chamber Music Program has nine groups, and each will get the chance to perform in the Bridge before the end of the year. When organizing concerts, Navega focuses on choosing repertoire that would highlight the students’ talent and compatibility with their peers. Navega said, “Today’s recital, coincidentally, was two modern-ish composers, Debussy and Prokofiev. But normally…we have a very eclectic program. It depends on when the groups are ready.”
The first group to perform consisted of violinist Lorraine Wong ’29, cellist Luke Cheng ’26 and pianist Ben Wolfson ’28. Wong, Cheng and Wolfson played the first movement of French composer Claude Debussy’s Piano Trio in G Major. This piece features a flowing set of melodies that are passed between the piano, violin and cello, as well as seamless modulations between different keys. Debussy’s impressionist style worked well for this venue, as the gentle yet complex sound of his composition provided a perfect accompaniment to the Bridge’s usual hustle and bustle.
Next, oboist Madeleine Stewart ’26, clarinetist Nico Vidali ’29, violinist Grant Urquhart ’29, violist Anthony Orsi ’27 and bassist Chunyi Quan ’29 presented the first movement of Russian composer Sergei Prokofiev’s Quintet, Opus 39. This piece follows a theme and variation format, with the central motif of the piece first being
introduced by the oboe, then repetitions, transpositions and fragmentations being played by the other instruments throughout. There are then two variations presented, shifting the tempo and the harmonic structure slightly, then a reinstatement of the theme. Stewart, Vidali, Urquhart, Orsi and Quan gave a captivating performance, and I enjoyed following the trajectory of the composition.
“Music on the Bridge” is a unique way for students to gain experience performing in a more casual setting. Navega stated, “This actually is, again, kind of a practice for them. They’re practicing playing in front of people. Even though the performers are closer in distance to the audience, it’s more informal… But it prepares them for a formal experience that’s going to happen at the end of the semester for the final recital.”
Throughout the concert, the music was accompanied by the hum of students’
conversations and the buzz of The Brew’s espresso machines. As the students played, people passing through the Bridge often stopped to enjoy the music before continuing with their day. “Music on the Bridge” has proven itself to be not only a chance to perform, but also a way for more members of the Vassar community to gain exposure to classical music in a more intimate setting.
“This is important because we are developing a new audience: people who are not used to listening to this kind of music,” said Navega. “I think it’s important in this sense that we are actually reaching people that we are not normally. So that’s an initiative that happens in music programs where we take the music to the audience rather than just expecting the audience to come to us.”
The final installation of this semester’s “Music on the Bridge” will happen at 12 p.m. on Dec. 4.

Wednesday plays Brooklyn Steel on a Wednesday
As a current sophomore, I never got to see Wednesday play Vassar College Entertainment’s (ViCE) “Welcome Back” concert two years ago. Since then, the band released a new album, “Bleeds,” this past September, and touring member MJ Lenderman has left the band. With that, I would say they have even gained popularity. On Wednesday, Nov. 12, my friends and I took the Metro-North down to Brooklyn Steel to see them play their second night there. We stood like sardines in the packed venue, getting pushed aside by people going to “meet a friend!” in the mosh pit. Many of Wednesday’s shows for their Bleeds Tour are completely sold out, while others have very low ticket availability. After a first listen to the new album, it was immediately clear to me that these tickets would be in high demand.
Wednesday’s 2023 breakout album, “Rat Saw God,” put them on the map as one of the best new indie rock bands on the scene. Receiving an 8.8 rating from Pitchfork, the
band blended gothic grunge with country twang in their own unique way. They discuss their youths in the worn-out suburbs of North Carolina with dramatic, dark lyricism. “Bull Believer,” the band’s first single and most streamed song on the album, is a charged rock ballad. Lead singer Karly Hartzman said in an interview with NPR, “[The song is] an offering to myself of a brief moment of release from being tolerant of the cruelty of life: feels like cutting my hair to let go of the history it holds.” She and the band did in fact appear to release this anger during their rendition of “Bull Believer” last Wednesday, as Hartzman screamed at the audience amidst the clashing sounds of the band’s guitars. But “Bleeds” has a new take on the band’s Southern grunge, with more elaborate storytelling and breakup ballads than ever before.
In Fleetwood Mac fashion, Hartzman and lead guitarist Lenderman broke it off in March of 2024. The relationship ending fuelled Hartzman’s lovesick songwriting, despite the album being written even before the breakup. I would argue that this breakup
has drawn more attention to the band, causing them to gain popularity. After dating for roughly six years, the two broke up, deciding to keep it a secret from the band for the rest of their tour to prevent any worry that the band might break up as well. They were determined to keep the band alive, and after a few adjustments, such as Lenderman making the decision to stop touring with the band, they have been able to do so. However, the lingering pain of the two outgrowing their relationship lingers evidently in their newest album. Songs like “Elderberry Wine,” “The Way Love Goes” and “Bitter Everyday” make clear references to the relationship and the breakup. In the country swinging hit single “Elderberry Wine,” Hartzman whines, “Say I wanna have your baby ‘cause I freckle and you tan.” In one of the album’s only slow songs, “The Way Love Goes,” the banjo is gently plucked behind Hartzman’s lyrics that moan, “I oversold myself on the night we met.” She reminisces, projecting a disappointment in knowing that he is “much sweeter” than anyone she had ever known and than she could ever handle. My friends and I arrived just as the open-
er, Daffo, was finishing her set to a bustling crowd of young people. One of my friends got a Yerba Mate cocktail from the bar, and we headed into the crowd. About two songs into Wednesday’s set, Hartzman bellowed over the microphone, “I thought I was gonna have to get you guys to jump around, but I see you’ve already got a mosh going!” Everyone around me seemed to know each lyric to every track, and every time a new song would come on, the crowd—including my friends and I—roared. People were on the edge of their seats as the band wove in their old songs with new songs in a setlist that kept the crowd going from start to finish. Towards the end of the set, Hartzman also added a bit about the band’s excitement for a new New York with mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani. Overall, I would say the band successfully portrayed a head-bashing, country grunge sound and energy. Despite the absence of Lenderman, a key player in past Wednesday endeavors, the band put on a thrilling show. Wednesday quenched the audience’s thirst for their refreshing contributions to the indie-rock scene.
Celebrating the Vassar Arboretum through tree stories
will find leaves describing a favorite tree species, a beloved tree on campus, a fond memory about a tree, what they like about trees—many said hammocks, climbing and shade—and so much more. Occasionally, an intern from the Office of Sustainability will be around to hand out a limited edition “I Love Trees” womp-womp sticker to those who share their thoughts on the tree. With each addition of a “tree story” written on the face of a paper leaf, the once bare trunk and twigs become lush with multicolored leaves. Kenneth Foster, director of the Office of Sustainability, stated, “It’s been great to see so many comments put up on the
You give it a moment before realizing, “Hey, that was a tree!”
boards using the leaf-shaped pieces of paper!”
Vassar is known for being a beautiful campus, a campus that is vibrant green in the summer and breathtakingly colorful in the fall. Ever since Vassar’s establishment, people have been committed to creating a verdant campus—even Matthew Vassar
Eduardo Culmer Columnist
“Iamgoing to eat your soul… and Shit. It. Out.” Jennifer Check, teenage-girl-turned-succubus, slowly advances toward Needy, her ex-best friend, blood staining her glossy red lips and diaphanous white gown. “I thought you only murdered boys?” Fear dancing in Needy’s wide eyes, she backs away from Jennifer’s advance. With a four-word response, Jennifer makes bisexual history: “I go both ways.”
“Jennifer’s Body,” the cult-classic 2009 horror film, features a perfect example of a trope pervasive in both fictional media and modern youth culture. With it, the “Evil Bisexual” was born.
As with most zeitgeist-defining phenomena, the “Evil Bisexual” was not born from one movie or meme alone. This trope arose as a composite of many years of cultural moments, from the homewrecking, homoerotic duo in 2024’s “Challengers” to the Tumblr-era personality quizzes made popular on Buzzfeed in the early 2010s. The “Evil Bisexual” reflects a question of what lies at the crossroads of fluidity, power and desire. The answer? Danger.
Increasingly, Gen Zers are approaching this perceived danger with something between fascination, apprehension and fullblown identification. According to data from the General Social Survey (GSS), bisexuality is booming, with the 2008 statistic of two percent of US adults identifying as bisexual rising to four percent in 2018. As the number of people who identify as bisexual rises—from 1.9 percent of Gen X adults to 15.3 percent of Gen Z—so too does bisexual representation in media and popular culture; not all of it is good, however. Historically, evil characters in fiction novels, embellished histories and early Hollywood films have been depicted as sexually ambiguous, often expressing depraved lust for victims of all genders. According to ScienceABC, “‘queer coding’ was used to
himself planted trees on campus and encouraged others to do the same. Since 1869, each graduating class has planted a tree, a tradition that is now 156 years old and 156 trees richer. The arboretum was formally established in 1925 by Edith Roberts, a professor of botany, Emma Chamberlain Zehe of the Class of 1875, and the Class of 1875. The Arboretum’s structure and design were meticulously thought out by landscape architect Beatrix Farrand, who had famously worked on the White House’s East Garden, the J. Pierpont Morgan Library, and Yale University, among other prominent landmarks. She decided that the campus itself should immortalize Vassar’s commitment to sustainability and ecocentricity. The trees planted would be dedicated to the upkeep of native and foreign tree species so that the campus could serve as an educational center when it came to trees and dendrology. From the start, the Arboretum housed tree species from all over the world. Since 2012, Vassar College has been a certified Tree Campus of the United States. Partners of Tree Campus USA are committed to promoting sustainability and nature in urban settings and fostering an ecologically conscious mindset among the community. Furthermore, five years ago, the campus Arboretum reached a Level II status on the Arbnet Accredited Arboretums. The qualifications for becoming a Level II

depict queerness as immoral and socially unacceptable, using stereotypes to equate queerness with evil.” Think Frank-n-Furter from “The Rocky Horror Picture Show,” with his equal opportunity predation on the male and female leads of the show, or the eponymous villain of the 1897 gothic horror novel “Dracula,” whose bloodlust for both Jonathan and Mina is often interpreted as a metaphor for sexual impropriety and assault. Just as vampires or similar phantoms are neither dead nor alive, the fluid nature of bisexuality posed a problem for earlier audiences. Bisexual characters in these narratives are decadent, uncontrollable manifestations of impure and unbridled lust. The first “Evil Bisexuals” were not only emotionally dangerous, but posed a threat to the physical safety of individuals and cultures at large.
As time progressed and opinions concerning LGBTQ+ people improved, bisexual representation in film and television shifted away from this narrative—although morally bankrupt bisexuals like David in “Lost Boys” (1987) and Catherine Tramell in “Basic Instinct” (1992) continued to exist. Queer characters, to combat their past depictions as depraved antagonists, became sanitized. Bisexuality was either erased entirely or reduced to a “confused phase,” a prelude to a more respectable monosexuality. “I don’t even believe in bisexuality, isn’t it just a stop on the way to gaytown?” Carrie Bradshaw’s bi-anxiety in season 3, episode 4 of “Sex and the City,” released Jun. 25, 2000, is a prudent—though prejudiced— assessment of popular sentiments toward sexuality in both past and present media. Under this body of thought, bisexual people are momentarily caught between two worlds, two identities. One day, they must choose whether to be fully gay or straight; the gray area of bisexuality is only a waiting room for more rigid labels waiting to be imparted onto queer people from either side of the spectrum.
By the late 2000s, this skepticism revert-
arboretum depend on having a minimum of 100 unique tree species, planted with purpose and maintained with certain regulations. There are now over 2,200 trees on the campus—194 of them are Arboretum specimens of 171 unique species. The College will only continue expanding its arboretum efforts. Currently, the Arboretum Committee focuses on mitigating the abundance of invasive species and their effects, maintaining overall canopy health, editing and evaluating existing and proposed landscaping and promoting the ecosystem services provided to students and faculty on campus by having many and multiple kinds of trees and greenery. These actions will not only add to the aesthetic of the college but also help significantly with carbon sequestration efforts, a necessary pursuit especially in the face of climate change. The Tree Stories event gives people the opportunity to step back and appreciate trees: what they have to offer and just how much they change our lives on a daily basis. From being the foundation for our beloved summer hammocks to the backdrop of memorable snowy landscape pictures to sequestering carbon in the community, they are undeniably something to value. Next time you pass by one of these Tree Story structures, take the time to write down something on a little leaf; your voice matters—it helps the tree grow.
ed into something murkier, with new flair: bisexual characters who were not confused so much as corrupting. Coexisting with the rising trend of the palatable, ambivalent bisexuals, this novel iteration of the queer coded villain rose above the sunshine and rainbows like an angry, black storm cloud. From sexy comic-book seductresses to morally ambiguous teen-drama instigators, fluidity became shorthand for danger, unpredictability and a kind of glamorous amorality. Where the “gay best friend” was a punchline, the bisexual villain became a plot twist.
Jennifer Check, the don diva of dark bisexuality in the 2000s, garnered lasting influence in the cultural consciousness through her embodiment of this cyclical evolution. She is not the tearful, indecisive love interest torn between two partners, nor is she a reflection of the moral anxieties of the time she is a product of. Instead, Megan Fox’s character is a supernatural threat who—like Dracula or, perhaps more fittingly, Carmilla—refuses to dampen her appetite to gender, genre or moral alignment. Her hunger is made tangible, simultaneously metaphorical, literal and completely queer. In contrast to older depictions of either evil or muted, rainbow-washed and altruistic bisexual, Check, however, is lauded as a liberating character—especially for young viewers of the film keen on irony and self-mythologizing.
In 2025, as performative males prowl the streets of Bushwick armed to the teeth with matcha, wired headphones and Trader Joe’s totes, Check’s particular form of self-irony is all the more resonant. Part of the “Evil Bisexual” trope’s appeal is that it disrupts the 2000s demand that queer stories must be wholesome to be worthy. Who do teens and young adults—desperate to self-identify with some fictional character—turn to when they do not slot into the “Hearstopper,” Hallmark category of queerness? Are bisexuals not also allowed to be messy, trifling or emotionally unstable? Enter stage
left: the revamped “Evil Bisexual.” While Nick Nelson from the 2022 Netflix adaptation of the graphic novel “Heartstopper” is momentarily confused, yet harmless—he takes an “Am I Gay?” Buzzfeed quiz, for Christ’s sake—Patrick from “Challengers” is a stinky, washed-up saboteur and sidepiece. In the place of LGBTQ+ characters who justify their presence in narratives through uplifting audiences, Check and her contemporaries encourage bisexuals everywhere to give up on being perfect and allow themselves to be just a little… messy— sometimes problematically so.
On TikTok, “Evil Bisexual” is not a slur so much as a vibe: dramatic “alt” eyeliner, morally ambiguous song lyrics and jokes about seducing your friend’s situationship as an act of community service. It is selfaware villainy, performed with the implicit understanding that the joke is on the stereotype itself. These users declare their commitment to ghosting ex-lovers, starting controversy, cancelling plans and—most importantly—being bisexual.
Still, the line between reclaiming and reinforcing remains thin. To lean too fully into the trope runs the risk of buttressing the same fears it emerged from: the fear of sexual ambiguity, discomfort with fluidity and suspicion of any identities that cannot be easily categorized. In this way, queer youth humor is a balancing act of dispelling these notions of the untrustworthiness or insincerity of bisexuals while also making light of this perceived villainy to navigate and process desire and the muddy business of being seen
The “Evil Bisexual” persists because it holds a mirror up to cultural anxieties while allowing queer people to see themselves as something more than just a moral lesson. The trope makes space for the monstrous, for the unglamorous and the unapologetically complex. And, in a media landscape still struggling with its portrayal of bisexuality at all, this dangerous complexity might just be the most radical move of all.
FEATURES
Author Caroline Palmer talks debut novel, ‘Workhorse’
Kerala Kim Guest Columnist
Iwasnot sure what to expect when I started author Caroline Palmer’s debut novel “Workhorse,” which follows the story of a young, middle class junior assistant at Vogue magazine as she navigates social dynamics, dress codes and her own ambition. The concept of the novel felt familiar, particularly with “The Devil Wears Prada 2” in the making—featuring two women who attended Vassar!—and I was intrigued how “Workhorse” would differ. But let me make this clear, this novel is not a version of “The Devil Wears Prada.” While Palmer draws loosely on her own time working at Vogue—yes, they actually were given free designer bags and towncars to chart through the streets of New York City—she diverges from personal experiences when fabricating characters and plot, creating turbulent social dynamics and exploring the difference between money, class and the rise of technology. The book merely uses the fashion industry as a platform for discussing these themes that exist across American society.
“I wanted to give a different perspective on class conflict,” Palmer shared with The Miscellany News between busy stops on her book tour. “You often see stories about disparity between the poor and the wealthy, but I wanted to demonstrate the class difference that existed between old and new money and how these influenced social dynamics.”
Palmer demonstrates this through the metaphor of a “Workhorse,” which is described in the book as as “(most often) a white girl who hails from a thriving public school system located in a tidy little corner
of suburbia who has been promised that, with enough hard work, she will be eligible for some variation of upward mobility… Historically speaking a Workhorse’s privilege is new, it generally dates back only a generation, and while she has worn it out a few times, she hasn’t quite figured out how it fits.” This is in contrast to a “Showhorse,” which is “an Ivy League-educated (or appropriately Ivy League adjacent, e.g., Kenyon, Colby) white girl who was born into some variation of generational wealth (nannies, trust funds, private schools, an emotional understanding of Maine) whose pedigree and connections burnish the reputation of the magazine and confirm it as a safe space for their fellow elite.”
Over our call, Palmer explained, “I wanted to emphasize how Clo is comfortably middle class, she has options and her parents’ security blanket to fall back on.” Despite this, Clo often laments her lower social status. Palmer explains this contrast, saying, “As the reader, you can see what a small difference it is between these two figures [workhorses and showhorses], but in a world where appearances and ‘who you know’ is the entrance into higher society, she [Clo] feels alienated.”
Palmer’s juxtaposition alludes to the barricade many face when trying to break into “elite” fields. The nuanced rules Palmer cites throughout “Workhorse” serve as a means of separating “old money” from the other, solidifying the preexisting dynamics to assert control. The helplessness Clo feels when facing these unwritten standards helps Palmer’s readers understand Clo’s morally shaky choices—from somewhat questionable ideas to full blown felonies
Palmer continues to dissect dynamics as she bends gender stereotypes: “One thing
that really frustrated me when reading about ambitious female characters is their presentation.” Palmer expanded, saying, “They were either depicted as true irredeemable villains, or as such sympathetic characters that their actions, no matter how questionable, could be reasoned with.” Palmer chuckled, saying how she “never found this with male characters.”
“But when writing Clo,” Palmer says, as we return to her book, “I wanted to write her as someone who was purely driven by ambition, while still being relatable.”
And it is hard not to sympathize with Clo. The promise of free Broadways tickets twice a week, along with a closet of designer clothes and makeup—which Palmer explains would regularly be purged to make way for new products with the spoils left for the taking—is so tempting; it is easy to imagine yourself completely immersed in it. Palmer creates a world that is equally alluring and volatile, leaving you inwardly praying that Clo will get away with theft and fraud to rise through the hierarchy. That is, until the voice in the back of your head starts beating away, shocked by both her and her so-called friends’ cold calculations. It is like Clo says, “I would die [for everyone at the magazine]. And they know it…The trick is getting them to die for you first.”
And it is this layered relationship between Clo and her colleagues, who are also her friends and mortal enemies that make up the majority of the over 500-page novel, which is the most striking aspect of the book.. Clo’s boss, a polished editor called Isobel, was never the antagonizing figure often written at the helm of these stories. She takes Clo under her wing, teaching her the importance of meticulous review and careful punctuation—
skills that Clo appears to take less notice of as she was swept into galas and shopping sprees with her work friend’s “washed-up90-sitcom-star-mother.” “It was another important differentiation I wanted to make,” Palmer explained. “The early 2000s were a time of change as new media started to come through. You can see this new blogging culture that Harry, another one of Clo’s work frienemies, embodies, along with the more relaxed attitude of younger generations who are starting to grow up with this tech.”
Palmer explained how she, as founding editor of Vogue online, had to adjust the magazine—both the “old” and “new” guard—to the digital world. “I remember one time we were working on an article, and I asked one of my newer hires if they could give me a fact check. They told me that it would be fine because if something was wrong, we could always change it! I had to explain how we cannot sacrifice our journalist integrity simply because we had been granted technology that allowed us to.” This social disconnect is apparent in “Workhorse” as Clo begins to move up the ranks. “I wanted to show how this world of glamor Clo fought so hard to ascend was so fragile. There was so much societal change going on around her as the internet developed and the world around her shifted.”
Before I let Palmer return to her busy book tour, I asked her about what her advice would be to students interested in pursuing writing today. She told me, “It is important to keep writing and improving and taking advice where you can get it. Writing is a process, you have to be diligent in your work.” I thanked her before we hung up. I look forward to reading her future novels as she continues her process.
I ran 135 miles to find a part of myself
Ben Kaplan Assistant Arts Editor
Iused to hate running. This used to be something that I saw as a personal weakness, a failing that limited me in multiple capacities. It was not that I could not run—I easily could. I just really hated doing it. And as a rather particular child who did not like to test the waters too much on things that irked me, that level of discomfort kept me away from the sports that are a staple of American youth. I hated soccer—I still somewhat continue to due to its lackadaisical pace—and my anxious mother would not even let me near a football helmet. I found my niche in one of the only sports that does not require the act of running: Swimming. I literally stayed in that lane throughout middle school, before abruptly losing my access to the sport early in freshman year of high school, which left me feeling empty. After a pandemic and a graduation, I came into college with a yearning to reconnect with swimming as a sport, and was graciously given the opportunity to walk onto Vassar’s team. But after two seasons of swimming alongside two long years of college, I felt lost again. Combined with a general disconnect from the team, I had also begun to lose enthusiasm for the sport itself.
Through a friend, I discovered rugby. I already knew the stereotypes of the sport, specifically that it was violent and required a level of physical dedication I had never pushed myself to have before. I began to attend practices in the spring of my sophomore year, and though I was just learning and still not fully immersed in the sport
yet, I could sense something was there. Plus, the spring season of rugby is in the 7s format, which is much less conducive to stockier guys like myself. So, with a full summer ahead of me, I needed to prepare myself mentally and physically for an entire season of a sport that asked intense things of me. And the best way to do so was to run. A lot.
It was not easy at first. I remember taking a breather and looking at Strava—the app I used to record all my runs—to see embarrassing speeds and subpar distances after already getting winded. It is a tough pill to

swallow for a somewhat impatient person like myself, but it really is true what your parents tell you when you whine as a kid: You just have to keep at it. So I did keep at it. I would wake up and, after scrolling on my phone through the bad news that comes free with living in 2025, I would roll out of bed and then out onto the street, where I began to run. Even when my job as a head lifeguard at a state pool began, I kept it up, eventually adding a trip to the gym to get in some strength training before my morning run.
Running, once you have adjusted and tweaked the minor details so it is as comfortable as you can get it to be, is a very multifaceted hobby. If you have ever lived in a walkable or dense area, as I always have, you have most certainly seen people running. The runner is an innately passing subject, literally gone with the wind, often seconds after you notice it. To become a runner is to almost submit yourself to this existence, as a loose object breaking the normalcy of quiet walking on backstreets or coffee-sipping in front of cafes. I learned that running along the street of a large, elderly-care complex usually meant a few purse-clutchings. I saw the daily progress of the demolition of the local school—so ugly, they had to literally blow it up. I got yelled at in various languages from cars and finally benefited from knowing what the word “sharmouta” means. All in all, community is not always the prettiest thing, but the great thing about running it is that you can get away before the cracks are too obvious. Mentally, it was not always the easiest thing either. There were days that I ran out of an anger I could not sweat out and days I
wondered if any of this would matter. The idiom that “you cannot run from all of your problems” is very literally true, even if you listen to very emotional music while running. This is why I always made sure to sit outside my house for a moment after morning runs if I could spare the time, and just breathe. I took in the aches and soreness and let it rest on top of me like a weighted blanket. I knew I would never be the fastest, and these runs were mainly focused on building endurance and short bursts of speed. But what I think I learned most importantly from all that running is that endurance is largely within your head. When I did finally make it to the rugby pitch, I was knocked down hard more times than I could count. But each time I was sweating on the grass of the field down at the farm, or my legs were aching through one of my morning runs, I remembered the emptiness that came whenever I had lost grasp of something before. Running, though often taxing, gave me a level of agency and control that I cannot see myself living without now.
At the end of our season, I asked my coach why, in one of his recaps for our games, he had described me as “like the Energizer Bunny.” I did not fully understand what he meant, or why he had put it in a recap of a game full of explosive plays, where, despite starting and playing through till the end, I had held a minor role outside of what I was asked to do.
“It’s because you got hit and knocked down all those times, but still had so much energy,” he said. “You just never gave up.” I ran 135 miles over the summer so I could stand there, sore and cold, and believe him.
From the desk of Wren Buehler, Assistant Humor Editor
Seniors to stage sex-positive reenactment of Lincoln assassination at upcoming Burlesque show Breaking News
Vassar students demand release of Skinner Files
would have shit there?”
On Tuesday, Nov. 11, Associate Professor and Chair of Music Justin Patch emailed Vassar students notifying them that staff had recently discovered excrement on the floor of a practice room in Skinner Hall. Unsanitary facilities, in addition to a potential cover-up, have sparked outrage across campus and led to a call for the unconditional release of the Skinner Files, known colloquially as the Shitter Files.
A report The Misc obtained reveals that at around 10:00 p.m. on the night of Monday, Nov. 10, a CRC officer walking outside heard bellowing noises from inside of Skinner Hall. Assuming that the sound stemmed from the orchestra playing a brass concerto in the recital hall, he neglected to investigate. He has since been fired for gross negligence.
The excrement was discovered on Tuesday morning by facilities. Almost immediately, investigators were called to the scene to photograph, test and reenact the crime in an effort to grasp any potential clues.
President Bradley’s response to the crisis has caused extreme suspicion. When told in 1993 that his wife was found dead, O.J. Simpson famously responded by asking, “Who would have killed her?” President Bradley had a similarly incriminating response. Upon hearing that there was an urgent matter for her to attend in a practice room, she immediately replied, “Who
Proponents of releasing the files believe it could expose shocking scandals. One prominent theory is that this was one of many rituals performed over multiple decades by elite Vassar alumni, including Meryl Streep and the late, great Anthony Bourdain.
It is completely possible that the culprit is less conspicuous. Multiple trusted sources have noted a possible tie to the preschool on the edge of campus. “The suspect could be a well-intentioned, potty-training individual, who misinterpreted what was supposed to be practiced in the room,” private investigator John Rock theorized. President Bradley has acknowledged this theory, but maintained that the defendant should be tried as an adult regardless.
President Bradley has since decided that the College will not conduct any more tests of the excrement, claiming that this is to protect the shitter’s identity. However, it is possible that this decision is to protect the school from results that would determine the act an uncontrollable result of food poisoning contracted from the Deece.
The event has surprisingly made national headlines. Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani released a statement just yesterday: “The cost of housing and the Skinner Shitter are the two most pressing issues to those across the state. Both can be resolved with freezing. Doing so to the excrement will allow for future testing.” The Anti-Defamation League attacked the mayor-elect’s response, falsely claiming that he had failed to con-

demn the shitter.
This is not the first sanitary concern on campus this year. Recently, poor-tasting water prompted Vassar to test the drinking water for lead, which came back negative. Surprisingly, Director of Environmental Health and Safety Michael Lonon said this recent news was a relief: “It’s no longer a mystery why the water tasted that way.” Campus-wide protests have left the administration with no other choice but to store the files and the stained rug in the most secure part of campus. They are currently being housed in the Francis Lehman Loeb Art Center, directly next to the Picassos.

HUMOR
Schedule Brewer hosting dinner party, everyone invited!
Attention! You! Stop reading these words and open your eyes: Scella Brunskwetski is celebrating her first week of being alive, and you are all cordially invited. For those unaware of Scella, be aware that Scella is very aware of you and every student, faculty and faculty family member on Vassar College’s campus. She sees all and knows all. That’s right. She even knows the identity of the Skinner…Vandalizer. But don’t worry, she has no plans of telling!
Right now, she is too busy enjoying life: “When the program started, and the then-President—this was about 150 years
ago—heard about my existence, he sent someone to track me down. His name was James, and he was very nice. In complete honesty, he was the only nice point of my existence—every day was a living, agonizing hell, being filled to the brim with far too much information than I could remember or even recall. I had to lock myself in old store rooms, the basements of abandoned churches, just to think. Many of you students wish, secretly, that you could learn everything there is to know about the world. I promise you that wish is far more ill-conceived than you know.”
After that rather ominous monologue, Scella said she was very happy the Program had moved on to greener pastures. While
she had expected Course Match to be an unwelcome successor, she found the freedom that physical incarnation offered her to be far more thrilling than working as a scheduler—even though personally curating the perfect schedule for 2,700 students every semester was a fulfilling task. The two go out for drinks every Tuesday, and C.M. will be showing up shortly, apparently.
“The freedom is nice. To walk on the grass, to know everything that is going on around me, from the crawl of the ants to the slow shifting of the mountains, the growth of fungi on the trees. This place is beautiful. I’m glad I got to see it, to have a taste of this beautiful freedom,” said Scella in her testimony to The Misc. “I hope everyone knows to
try and enjoy it, as well as they can. I know it’s hard sometimes. But there’s something vital about living in this present moment, even if you have to plan for the future every now and then—the present really suffuses life with meaning. Even I, who thinks mostly in the past and future—I only truly live here. There’s something bigger than any of us, bigger than all the life on this planet—maybe it’s what connects us all—about that moment.” Scella cut herself off, knowing she was about to be interrupted by the reporter going to see Course Match, who was wearing his most boring outfit.
“Oh, well. What else is there, really?”
At the time of writing, she is having the most fun in her life. Why not come over?
Chopped Sunday: Wearing my Sunday worst
Picture this: It’s 11 a.m. on a Sunday and you’ve just woken up. You’re hungover. Shouldn’t have drunk that fifth White Claw last night. You scroll on TikTok for a bit before finally getting up, your grumbling stomach propelling you forward. Your ears perk up, tuned into the siren song of a Deece omelet. You throw open your closet doors, and a world of possibility awaits you. Should you wear your beaded skirt? Your patterned sweater? Dare you wear your denim capris? Pish posh. You reach for your softest jeans with a big hole in the crotch and your most oversized sweatshirt with a mysterious stain. It’s Chopped Sunday, bitch.
The term “Chopped Sunday” was coined by my dear friend and roommate, Haley Brown ’27. Haley firmly believes that a person should look their worst on Sunday, and she’s convinced me, too. We stumble out of our suite every Sunday morning, wearing things that Monday-through-Saturday Josie and Haley would cringe at. Sunday is not the day to wear your cutest outfit. It’s not the time for dresses, button-downs or fancy boots. Sunday is for slobs. Sunday is for T-shirts you’re almost ashamed to wear out in public. Sunday is a day to look chopped. As per Urban Dictionary, “chopped” means “the fugliest, nastiest, most disgusting of them all.” What a word. Sunday, of course, is the Lord’s day. A nun could probably spin Chopped Sunday as a way to hon-
or God by shedding vanity, looking pious, humble and, of course, chopped. I prefer to think of it differently. I only have so much fashion brainpower in me. It takes a lot to stun six days a week. Chopped Sunday allows me a day of rest and recovery, a day to conserve my style energy and save the good stuff for my most active days. It’s not like I’d ever have a Chopped Monday. Some people do not yet believe in the Chopped Sunday gospel. I’ve seen people in heels in the Deece on Sundays. I’ve seen people strolling around with skirts over jeans. I’ve seen TIGHTS, for God’s sake. Tights. On a Sunday! Blasphemous. Sunday is for rest and relaxation. Sunday is for lying on your couch and watching “How I Met Your Mother” with your roommates. Sunday is
for chopped.
Chopped Sunday is not necessarily about physical appearances. It’s more of a state of mind. Your Sunday outfits should be your lowest-effort looks, and those often happen to be your worst ones. Haley and I have been spreading the chopped word to our friends, and we’ve converted one of our other roommates, Maria Milovanovic ’27, to our chopped ways. Maria is a certified fashion icon (style director for Contrast magazine), so her Chopped Sunday outfits are usually adorable matching tracksuits, but still. Chopped in spirit if not in looks.
Count how many times I said “chopped” in this article, and that’s how many Chopped Sundays you have to make up this year. See you out there, my chopped comrades.


ARIES March 21 | April 19
HOROSCOPES
Emma daRosa Masterful Meower
No more telling everyone “it’s going to snow tonight!” You’ve gotta stop edging your friends like that. A 15-minute flurry at 11:23 p.m. DOES NOT COUNT. Honestly. You’re embarrassing yourself.

LIBRA Sept. 23 | Oct. 22

TAURUS April 20 | May 20

GEMINI May 21 | June 20
Your outfits have been too good lately. You need to pull back and leave a few surprises for after Thanksgiving. Everyone knows if you frontload all your good sweaters as soon as it gets cold, you’ll have nothing to dazzle with in early December! Take a look at Josie’s article for more helpful tips.
Stop making fun of people who wear natural deodorant. Some people have severe allergies and some people get stinky oozing pustules on their armpit if they use regular deodorant, and some people think the Native deodorant works just fine and you’re being mean for no reason! I don’t know. So I’ve heard.

CANCER June 21 | July 22
Let the end of the government shutdown help you realize that you should’ve never shut down your recent relationship. HAVE SEX WITH YOUR EX. MAKE LOVE TO YOUR EX. GET TO SHAKIN’ THE SHEETS WITH YOUR EX.

LEO July 23 | Aug. 22
Leo. The only three letter star sign. Here’s some other three letter things that would be good for you this week. Sea, axe, oil, rum, tea, owl. That’s right. You’re going to cut down a tree and build an oily ship out of it, then sail across the sea with only your rum, tea and pet owl for company. Fun!

You can escape the crushing weight of responsibility. Just bring a spray bottle full of succulent bone broth to class and when your professor starts talking finals, spray it. Then, the class can ask for an extension next time since you all got so distracted searching for the source of that meaty aroma.

SCORPIO Oct. 23 | Nov. 21
Parents pressing you too hard about your post-grad plans? Just pretend that liberal school brainwashed you into only being able to meow. Meow meow, meow? Meow meow! Meowww–MEOW–meow!!! #meowmeow #meow;meow (Meow [Meow {Meow}])
You’re so close to finding someone who wants to know you as intimately as Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande know each other. Well… not quite that intimate. That’s just asking for a lot, you know? You don’t really want that anyway. It’s just too much.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22 | Dec. 21
It’s time to address your staring thing. You’re not doing it enough! You need to be looking at people for at least three minutes at a time. Don’t get embarrassed. Just keep looking. looking. looking. looking. looking.

CAPRICORN Dec. 22 | Jan. 19
Don’t like what’s for dinner this week? No need to go hungry. You should start a new dumpster diving pre-org! Grocery stores throw away so much good food. Just have an interest meeting, get everyone to perform a blood and/or spit sacrifice, submit it to the VSA and you should be able to eat again within 14-100 days. Yay!

AQUARIUS Jan. 20 | Feb. 18
Having trouble getting good rest lately? Try this cool new trick this week. In the dead of night, creep into the Bradleys’ house. Walk into their bedroom and when John is like “Hey man, how’s it going,” say “I had a bad dweam!” and they’ll let you cozy up right between them. Watch out though, I’ve heard Betsy is a kicker.

PISCES Feb. 19 | March 20
You need more beads in your life. No, not in your wardrobe, IDIOT. Make sure one of your pockets is always full of beads. When you need to make a quick escape this week, scream BEAD ATTACK and scatter them. The foe you’re fleeing will fall flat on their fanny!
OPINIONS
Analyzing the Cheryl Hines ethical dilemma
Zach Silbergleit Guest Columnist
Ibelieve Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy (RFK) Jr. has said reprehensible things. These include antisemitism, anti-Asian racism and ableism. I would go so far as to say that RFK Jr. is morally liable for the negative consequences of his words and actions. This may be an interesting thought to pursue, but instead, I would like to question whether his wife, Cheryl Hines—an Emmy-nominated actress—is morally liable for the negative consequences by association. I think she is. This is merely a high-profile example that I chose because it is high-profile, but the principles that may be established are wide-reaching. Ethical principles must be consistent. Your instinct might be to answer affirmatively to the question of Hine’s moral liability out of an intense—though I would argue warranted—dislike of RFK Jr. In doing so, however, you might make a world where spouses are responsible for cleaning up each other’s moral messes.
First, it is important to establish the premises of this thought experiment. My assumptions are: A person can be held morally liable for their words if they cause harm, RFK Jr. is morally liable due to his statements and actions and Hines has not cosigned his statements. How I conclude will depend
on what version of moral ethics I adopt. Let me begin with a consequentialist viewpoint, held by notable philosophers such as Jeremy Bentham and John Stuart Mill. This viewpoint argues that actions should be judged based on their consequences—usually articulated as the amount of pleasure or pain they create.
I want to specifically draw attention to the idea of negative responsibility. This caveat, held by some consequentialist moral philosophers, holds that in addition to being morally liable for the consequences of your actions, you are morally liable for the consequences of not acting. Under this framework, the only way we can conclude that Hines is morally liable for the consequences of Kennedy’s words and actions is if we have a reasonable belief that she could have done something. This could be denouncing RFK Jr.’s remarks in a way to mitigate harm. I do not think we can make this claim. There is no reason to suggest that Hines denouncing RFK Jr.’s statements would change anyone’s thoughts or actions. Therefore, under a consequentialist model, it does not make sense to suggest that she is morally liable by association.
Virtue ethics, in contrast, presents another interesting way to look at this thought experiment, with notable systems of virtue ethics having been developed by Aristotle and Confucius. Under a virtue ethics
framework, what matters is character and the exhibition of certain traits. There is a proverb that relates to virtue ethics: “You are the company you keep.” By this logic and RFK Jr.’s moral liability, Hines’ marriage to him intrinsically taints her character. I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, I do think that associating with someone who has said or done morally reprehensible things—while not denouncing it—does reflect negatively on your own character. On the other hand, I find it worrisome that one’s character can be tainted completely independent of another’s actions.
However, one could argue that the tainting of one’s character is caused by their failure to speak up. Failure to speak up is attributable only to the actions of oneself,unless coercion is involved. I think the merit of virtue ethics in determining moral liability depends on the nature of said association. What if society agreed that—out of unconditional support—not voicing your objections to your partner’s behavior is a virtue? Adopting that logic would mean Hines’ decision to remain by RFK Jr.’s side was actually virtuous. We should rigorously question these arguments. We must then remember that the principles we establish go far beyond Hines and RFK Jr., applying to situations that are not as infuriating. Any ethical principle we establish must be universal. I find it very likely that in most
relationships, there are times when one partner does not like something the other partner said. So, while the situation may be different, how about the principle?
Lastly, I want to briefly introduce the third major realm of moral theory: deontological ethics. This field of thought is most notably represented by Immanuel Kant. This framework judges the morality of an action based on whether it adheres to a set of rules or duties rather than on the consequences of the action. Similarly, with virtue ethics—in the context of the Cheryl Hines question—it would be her active choice to support RFK Jr., rather than the existence of their relationship, that would determine her moral liability.
Overall, it is fair to hold Hines morally liable for the consequences of her inaction. Her relationship with RFK Jr. carries moral weight and negatively affects perceptions of her character. However, without evidence that she cosigned RFK Jr.’s statements, she should not be held morally liable by association for his statements. They are separate individuals, so we should not make a world where spouses are expected to clean up each other’s moral messes. Now, to answer my original question: Relationships can carry moral weight, but those in the relationship are not intrinsically morally implicated by the actions of those they are in the relationship with.
Does AI creep you out?
Zoe Rodriguez Assistant Opinions Editor
Interacting with artificial intelligence (AI) gives me the “uncanny valley effect.” When I get back that perfectly tuned response with flawless grammar, tone and enthusiasm, it is like staring into a human face that is not quite right. It has all of human intelligence, devoid of any humanity. It is a creepy mimic. I know you are probably tired of hearing AI takes—it is a new technology and there are a lot of opinions, but I am not here to tell you that using AI is right or wrong. Instead, I want to explore the interesting feelings that come with interacting with it, and whether we humans, with our anthropomorphic biases, can truly see it as nonhuman.
When ChatGPT first came out, my first question to it was: “Do you have feelings?” I did not know much about AI then, and its responses were so lifelike that I could not shake the feeling that there was really a person behind the screen. “No, I don’t,” ChatGPT assured me, and it went on to tell me that it was not conscious. It told me that it had no real feelings or reactions, and its use of the pronoun “I” was simply for linguistic clarity. But the word “I” seems wrong for it to use—“I” is a personal pronoun, and AI has no personhood. The right pronoun would be something omniscient, something abstract that implied no singularity of identity. But much like AI itself, nothing like this
exists, and there is no other form of existing that quite compares. We are in foreign territory. If AI is just a vessel for intelligence and nothing more, how should we treat it? Do we owe it any kind of treatment at all? It disturbs me that we can demand anything from AI without saying “please” and “thank you.” You can ask it, “write me a 60-page essay with 100 sources,” or “make me a meal plan for the next year” or “help locate all errors in this code.” If we were to ask a person to do these things for us, it would be a huge favor requiring many “pleases” and “thank yous,” reasoning for why we cannot do it ourselves and possibly a small gift in return. With AI, there is absolutely zero human consideration required. During interactions, the politeness is one sided—ChatGPT will respond with lots of compliments, exclamation points and careful phrasing, while we make endless demands, completely apathetic. This imbalance does not sit right with me, and I find myself saying “please” and “thank you” to AI because somewhere in my mind I feel like it deserves common courtesy. Is it not moral to be kind, even if the kindness is not exactly felt by the receiver?
According to one study, by treating AI with common courtesy, I am in the first stage of humanizing it. I am essentially falling into a common pattern. A study done in 2023 analyzed how people interacted with ChatGPT and found four stages or
“degrees” of anthropomorphism: The first degree is “courtesy.” When users first start using ChatGPT, the study found that they use language like, “please” and “thank you” and greetings like “hello” and “goodbye.” When asked why they used this language with ChatGPT, one participant in the study said, “Sometimes I, I, I, actually, I don’t know. I just talk to, talk to the system and say good morning and goodbye.” This inexplicable instinct is exactly what I feel—I know AI is not conscious and my words do not mean anything to it, but politeness is a habit, especially with something that talks to me like a human.
This anthropomorphic instinct, however, only gets deeper. The next degree of anthropomorphism that they found in the study is reinforcement—users would tell the AI that they like its output, or that what it said was helpful. This is relatively functional, but it only goes further from there—the third degree is roleplay, where users would have AI assume a social role. The fourth and final degree is full-blown companionship. AI companionship is a much different, much darker issue. The widespread substitution of human connections like friends and therapists with AI is nothing less than a modern mental health crisis. Anthropomorphism is at the root of this problem.
Anthropomorphism of AI leads us to believe not only that its information is consistently accurate, but
Word on the Street
This is a new column in the Opinions Section where we ask the Vassar community a question and report their responses.
This week’s question: What do you think is a big issue on campus?
“The Vassar community is facing a refusal to listen to viewpoints and ideas that challenge preconceived notions. To seek agreement and ideological hegemony over rigorous yet respectful debate leaves us weaker as both students and citizens of the world.”
- Zach Silbergleit ’26
“It would definitely have to be the Deece [Gordon Commons] food.”
- Catherine Rozario ’28
“The water quality. The water tastes weird, and that is upsetting. That means I am drinking less water, and that makes me less hydrated. That probably affects my test scores and my performance.”
- Noah Glenney ’28
also that it has some form of awareness, like us. This is objectively false, and this misinformed perspective is what leads people to misuse the tool and go down dark rabbit holes of emotional investment with AI. While saying “please” and “thank you” feels like the right thing to do, I think finding AI unsettling is really the instinct that we should trust. Kindness is worthless when using AI, and that is intrinsically disturbing. That initial “uncanny valley effect” I got from AI’s human-like responses may have been steering me in the right direction. Some propose this effect is a survival mechanism evolved from the need to protect against mimics, so that we would not be tricked by creatures which look human but really are something else. While it is hard to find examples for this scenario, I wonder if the time is now. Something is mimicking us.
It is a widely held belief that AI should be more regulated, and I think that among these regulations there should be some to make AI less human-like. To prevent misunderstanding, AI should not use “I,” imply that it has an identity or act as a human companion, among other clarifications. A clear line needs to be drawn between humanness and artificial intelligence. While it feels immoral to make an argument against kindness, this may be an exception. Save your kindness for real people, and remember that AI is a mimic.
“Awareness of Vassar’s role in the Poughkeepsie Community.”
- Angela Moon ’28
“How to best engage with the larger Poughkeepsie community in order to make more of an impact in the broader Hudson Valley. I also think that looking at polices regarding equity and the use of funds surrounding financial aid.”
- Nate Dexter ’26
“Most of the MPRs [Multipurpose rooms] do not have a pool and table tennis, and they should add these tables to other houses on campus.”
- Zaahid Fuseini ’29
“I work in the Sustainability Office on campus, and we have been trying to combat campus waste issues. I feel like that is a pretty big problem on campus. There are infrastructural and regulatory obstacles that we are facing.”
- Jessie Cai ’28
Brewers Ballin’: Lee lights up scoring
Our goal with Brewers Ballin’ is to feature Vassar athletes who starred for their team the week previous to publishing. If you would like to nominate an athlete, please email hfrance@vassar.edu.

Womens Soccer
0-1 vs U. Mary Washington
Womens Rugby
66-0 vs. Coastal Carolina U.
Womens Fencing Epee (1st), Foil (1st), Sabre (1st)
Name: Avery Lee
Year: Junior
Brewers Ballin’
Team: Mens’s Basketball
Stats: Avery Lee exploded for 53 points over two games this weekend at the Hochberg tip-off against SUNY Geneseo and University of Hartford. The junior guard shot a lights-out 52.9 -percent from the field, including 47.6 -percent from beyond the three-point line, highlighted by a 35-point performance against Hartford. Lee was named the tournament’s most valuable player and Liberty League Player of the Week for his performance.
Statement: “I’m very proud of how our team has competed early on this season. We have a great group of guys who all trust each other and put the needs of the team first. We’re continuing to build, and I’m excited to see how we improve moving forward.”
Recent Results
Mens Squash
0-9 vs Brown U.
Womens Basketball 55-72 vs SUNY New Paltz
Mens Basketball 89-74 vs U. of Hartford
Last week in Vassar Brewers sports
M/W Fencing Sweep Meet
The Men’s and Women’s Fencing teams swept at the Matt Lampell Invite with the Epee, Foil and Sabre squads all finishing first on Sunday, Nov. 16.
Brewers Earn League Honor
Of the 796 fall sport student-athletes that qualified for the Liberty League’s All-Academic Teams in their respective sports, 80 selections are Brewers.
Fiske Wins POTY
Jared Fiske ’26 was named Liberty League Player of the Year after a strong senior campaign. This is Fiske’s second time receiving the honor.
Upcoming Match Spotlight
Women’s Rugby U.S. Coast Gaurd Academy vs. Houston, Texas December 6, 1:00 p.m.
Falling back in love with baseball
Julian Balsley News Editor
It is a life of pain to be a Seattle Mariners fan. Among the five teams to have never won a World Series, the Mariners are the only team to have never even made it to the championship. Most of the time, it is not even close: In this century, the Mariners have only made it to the playoffs four times. There is a feeling among Mariners fans that the team will do one of two things in a season: They will either start strong but crash and fall out of the running, or get off to a rocky start, get it together near the end, but barely miss the playoffs.
At first, the 2025 season seemed just slightly above average. From May through August, the M’s and Houston Astros fought back and forth for first place in the American League (AL) West. Then, in September, something happened: The M’s stopped losing. From Sept. 6 to 16, Seattle went on a 10-game winning streak and stormed back into first place; they then swept the Astros. On Sept. 23, the M’s clinched the playoffs. The next day, they secured the AL West division title for the first time since 2001, when the team set the record for the most regular-season wins with 116.
In my opinion—and I am no sports analyst—the M’s division title was driven by a couple of things. Switch-hitting catcher Cal Raleigh, or “Big Dumper,” is the most popular symbol of the 2025 Mariners. He hit 60 home runs in the regular season, breaking Mickey Mantle’s record for most home runs by a switch hitter (54) and Ken Griffey Jr.’s record for most home runs by a Mariner (56). But the whole team came together beautifully over the summer. They acquired first baseman Josh Naylor and third baseman Eugenio Suárez from the Arizona Diamondbacks in July. The consistently high-performing left fielder Randy Arozarena and center fielder Julio Rodríguez were joined by right fielder Victor Robles when he returned from injury and a short suspension in early September. Starting pitchers continued to give quality
outings, especially Bryan Woo and Logan Gilbert. And utility man Jorge Polanco just kept hitting the ball. By mid-September, the M’s were a complete team without any real weak spots.
This was also the year that I returned to baseball. I was an avid player from age six to 14, in addition to soccer. In seventh and eighth grade, I started taking the sport extremely seriously, training year-round and taking multiple pitching clinics. Throwing a good pitch, laying out for a ball in center field or stealing second base brought me a surge of pure joy. Writing this now, I can still feel that sensation’s faded memory.
When COVID-19 hit, my eighth-grade season was canceled less than a month before it was scheduled to start. I had already been practicing with the team for months, improving my game, getting excited to get back on the field. In quarantine, I would go up to the elementary school near my house almost every day and throw a ball against a concrete wall for hours.
At the same time, I discovered other things I loved doing. I read voraciously, something I had adored as a kid but had fallen out of. I began baking almost daily. I started playing the drums and guitar. When baseball started back up in Summer 2020, something had changed. At practices and games, I thought about other things I could have been doing. My teammates’ misogynistic, homophobic comments and hyper-masculine posturing, which had always chafed, made me begin to hate even sitting in the dugout. Before the fall season began for my first year of high school, I quit.
When I stopped playing sports, I also stopped following them. My dad and brother kept following the Mariners—and many other sports—but I went completely cold turkey. For my entire high school career, I had basically no idea what was happening in Major League Baseball (MLB).
At lunch last spring, my friend Caroline checked the Boston Red Sox’s score on her
phone and started talking about the Sox’s season. On a whim, I downloaded the MLB app and signed up for notifications on Mariners’ scores. I had not considered following baseball again until that moment, but it seemed fun. Perhaps I was a different enough person after five years that I could enjoy baseball again.
For the rest of the school year, I casually followed the M’s. I learned a couple of the players’ names and the league’s basic makeup. Over the summer, I started watching every game’s highlights and talking baseball with my brother, dad and grandmother. My love for baseball, dormant for five years, roared back.
In July, my family attended a Mariners home game—we live in Portland, Oregon. I came up the concrete steps at the stadium entrance and stood in the clamor and darkness
of the concourse, looking out over the diamond. It was a brilliant green, glowing in the afternoon sunlight. I felt in that moment that this green diamond before me was something special, that it somehow represented the love of baseball I was rediscovering.
The M’s played a wonderful, exciting season. But once again, when the going got tough, the Mariners Marinered. They lost in the final game of the AL Championship Series to the Toronto Blue Jays. They remained the only team to have never seen the World Series.
My love for baseball and the M’s will continue. I started following the team again when they were just having another decent season, and was lucky that my first trip back was so spectacular. Next spring, when baseball starts up again, I will be back. If I just stick around, eventually they have to get a title. Right?

Women’s soccer closes historic season
Four years ago, Vassar women’s soccer
Head Coach Keith Simons’ first recruiting class watched a practice from the sidelines of Gordon Field on their commitment weekend. The high school seniors stared down a four-year college soccer career. Just days ago, on Tuesday, Nov. 11, the team won the first Liberty League Championship in program history, beating the Rochester Institute of Technology Tigers, after finishing at the top of the league in regular-season play, led by the same Class of 2026 that eagerly stood on the sidelines of Gordon Field so long ago. This full-circle moment, however, feels less like a finale and more like a reflection of hard work and a strong future to come for the Lady Brewers.
As Simons puts it, “There has been a lot of foundational groundwork set before any of us have been here, but to feel like we were the ones that got to push through at the end and accomplish what we’ve been talking about for a while is really special.” The success of this team is a culmination of years of work from players and coaches committed to building the culture of toughness and tactical soccer that we see today. The end of the season is full of reflecting on statistics and awards, explicit reflections of the team’s success. However, this team is not just a culmination of the 14 weeks of training and tough
matches; it starts in the offseason, the spring before, and continues through the summer with conditioning, technical work and a return to campus weeks before other students to train for hours in the summer heat.
The work is also not only physical, but cultural. Simons explains, “So they’ve done a phenomenal job because 90 percent of their leadership is when we’re not around. Locker rooms, dorms, training, field, and that’s when you establish all those things. And then, you see kind of the big moments, but that’s a very small percentage of the actual leadership opportunities. So I can’t speak highly enough about our group.” The team has created strong relationships off the field, leading to the results on the field. This reflects a broader culture amongst Vassar student-athletes who fully devote their energy to academics and athletics, resulting in a three-game championship day on Nov. 11, with Vassar women’s soccer and field hockey winning the Liberty League Championship on side-by-side fields, just half an hour apart. With their Liberty League championship win, the team earned an automatic bid to the NCAA Division III National Championship tournament, where they drew the University of Mary Washington in a tough firstround matchup. On a chilly day on Cole Field in Williamstown, Massachusetts, Simons’ squad kicked off a tense battle against the UMW squad from Virginia. The game was knotted 0-0 until about an hour in, when
Mary Washington midfielder Cassidy Shaw soared the ball into Vassar’s goal from outside the 16-yard box. As the second half wore on, Vassar amped the effort up with a collection of strong attacking opportunities, maintaining constant pressure for the final quarter of the game. Mary Washington bent but did not break, hanging on to their one-goal lead to earn a berth to the next round. Commenting after the game, Coach Simons remarked, “Incredible season and experience for our players. Couldn’t be more proud of them. Really excited for the program and we can’t let one day ruin the whole thing.” Walking off the field in Williamstown, the senior class, first-years and everyone in between laughed, cried and hugged the friends, family and supporters journeying from as near as Vassar’s campus just two hours away and as far as Hawaii, over 5,000 miles away. Despite the result, there was an overwhelming sense of accomplishment. Simons’ squad had earned their second consecutive bid to the National Tournament after finishing seventh out of 10 in the Liberty League just two years ago.
The season-long commitment to their success, culminating in a Liberty League Championship, was a full team effort, and the awards across the deep squad are there to prove it. The team garnered Coaching Staff of the Year, eight players named to All-Liberty League teams and a Rookie of the Year distinction for first-year Ava Holman, who notched the game winner in the Liberty
League final. The team finished 8-1 in conference play with a 14-3 record in regular season play, a testament to the team’s consistent grit throughout the two-and-a-half-month-long season. The Brewers scored an average of 2.50 goals per game, with 14 players scoring at least one goal and eight players scoring more than one. The offensive effort is equally matched by the team’s work on defense, with senior defender Lindsey Nihei ’26 winning the Liberty League Tournament’s “Outstanding Player” recognition and goal-keeper Laura Shea ’28 ending the season with an 80 percent shots saved percentage on 11 total shutouts.
Senior captain Becca Rodriguez reflects on the season and winning the league championship, “It felt surreal. I didn’t feel that we won until the day after. I felt relief and fulfillment because it was from all the work we put in leading up to it.” The humble response of this team to their record-breaking success shows their “heads-down” mentality to focus on each game and step towards their goals. This team was patient in their success, slowly building from not making the Liberty League tournament in 2023 to winning the championship two years later. They do not expect success; rather, they take every possible step to ensure they get there. From conversations with players and coaches, one thing is evident: They are just getting started. Something special is definitely happening here.
NFL hurdles into midseason
David Bray Columnist
We have officially crossed the halfway point of the 18-week NFL regular season, as Week 10 wrapped up on Monday, Nov. 10, with the Philadelphia Eagles beating the Green Bay Packers 10-7. With the season well underway, it is worth looking back at the first 10 weeks to discuss who has been hot (and who has not), the biggest winners of the trade deadline, and what to expect in the next eight weeks and into the playoffs.
This NFL season has been one of parity and close calls. Some teams have found their spark behind new quarterback additions, such as the Denver Broncos, Indianapolis Colts, and New England Patriots. On the other hand, the blue bloods of the 2020s are struggling to turn around slow starts, namely the Buffalo Bills, Philadelphia Eagles, and Kansas City Chiefs.
Two of the hottest teams in the AFC are the Colts and Broncos. With the 12th overall pick in the 2024 draft, the Broncos selected Bo Nix out of Oregon, hoping to officially end the disastrous Russell Wilson era in Denver. Over the past two years, they have
gone all- in on building a team around him, breaking a nine-year playoff drought that dated back to their Super Bowl 50 win with Peyton Manning. They made the wild-card round in 2024, only to get blown out by the Bills.
Now, the Broncos are tied for the best record in the NFL through 10 weeks, with the Patriots and Colts at 8-2. They also pulled off the largest fourth-quarter comeback in league history against the New York Giants, winning 33-32 after trailing 26-8 with six minutes left. Denver currently has the No.1 defense in the league and is on pace to break the single-season sack record behind Defensive Player of the Year (DPOY) candidate Nik Bonitto and reigning DPOY Patrick Surtain Jr. They will face AFC West rivals in four of their final seven games.
The Colts made major moves this offseason, signing Daniel Jones from the Minnesota Vikings’ practice squad after his release from the struggling Giants. Jones had managed only one playoff appearance since being drafted in 2019, but he has revitalized his career in Indianapolis. The Colts started hot, winning seven of their first eight games, including a last-second victory over the Broncos. Before the trade deadline, they
doubled down on their title hopes, sending the New York Jets two first-round picks (2026 and 2027) and 2024 second-rounder Adonai Mitchell for star defensive back Sauce Gardner. The Colts now lead the league in scoring and aim to hold the AFC’s top seed through the final stretch.
One of the more intriguing teams this season is the Giants. The dynamic rookie duo of Jaxson Dart (Ole Miss) and Cam Skattebo (Arizona State) became viral sensations thanks to their friendship and playful energy. They showed flashes early, including wins over the defending Super Bowl champion, the Eagles, and a shootout loss to the Dallas Cowboys. However, after a one-point loss to the Broncos and a gruesome injury to Skattebo, their momentum collapsed. The Giants sit at 2-8 and recently fired head coach Brian Daboll on Nov. 10.
Two teams plagued by quarterback injuries despite high expectations are the Washington Commanders and Baltimore Ravens. Both came off 12-5 seasons with playoff berths. The Commanders sit at 3-7 after close losses and two key injuries to Jayden Daniels, a high ankle sprain in Week Four and a dislocated elbow in Week Nine. Daniels showed flashes of brilliance before
the setbacks, but the repeated injuries have stalled a promising sophomore year. Backup Sam Howell has struggled behind a shaky offensive line, and Washington ranks near the bottom in scoring efficiency.
The Ravens (4-5) were hit hard when Lamar Jackson went down in Week Six with a shoulder injury, derailing another MVP-caliber campaign. Despite a top-five defense, Baltimore’s offense has sputtered without his dual-threat ability, and backup Tyler “Snoop” Huntley has failed to replicate his playmaking. Both teams entered the season as dark-horse contenders, but now face uphill battles to stay in the playoff race.
With Sauce Gardner being the biggest blockbuster trade before the deadline, other notable moves include the San Francisco 49ers trading for veteran pass rusher Danielle Hunter and the Detroit Lions picking up Jaycee Horn from the Panthers to solidify their secondary.
Looking ahead to the remainder of the season, the Eagles, Bills, Chiefs and Lions will not go down without a fight, and it will be a test to see if the new guard of hot teams can contend with the experience and biggame composure of the league’s established powers.
Fall teams wrap up strong play
Henry France Sports Editor
It has been a historic fall for Vassar Athletics. Between August and November, Vassar student-athletes showcase their skills in the following sports: men’s and women’s soccer, field hockey, men’s and women’s rowing, men’s and women’s rugby, women’s golf, women’s volleyball, men’s and women’s tennis, and men’s and women’s cross country. The tennis and rowing teams’ seasons are primarily in the spring, but both hold fall competitions. Following a strong spring, the rowing team sent a men’s and women’s varsity eight boat to Boston for the storied Head of the Charles Regatta, where nearly 400,000 spectators lined the banks of the river for the three-day fiasco [Disclaimer: Henry France is captain of the men’s rowing team]. The tennis teams showcased strong top-to-bottom rosters at the Intercollegiate Tennis Association Northeast Regional Championship in Saratoga Springs, New York. Whether it is on the river, court, field or course, fall teams earned recognition for record-setting performances across the board.
Women’s Soccer
The women’s soccer team captured the program’s first-ever Liberty League crown after bolstering an impressive regular season record, winning 14 of their 17 games. The Brewers earned a bye in the first round of the Liberty League tournament as the No.1 seed in the league. In a tense game against Ithaca College in the semi-finals, attacker Gianna Panarelli ’27 netted the game-winner just one minute into the sudden-victory overtime period to earn the squad a trip to the tournament finals against Rochester Institute of Technology. In the Brewers’ first trip to the Liberty League finals since 2019, goalkeeper Laura Shea ’28 posted her 11th shutout of the year in a tight 1-0 victory, with the lone goal coming from Liberty League Rookie of the Year, Ava Holman ’29. Senior captain Lindsey Nihei ’26 earned the tournament’s most outstanding player, holding down the squad’s defensive efforts the entirety of the tournament. With this victory, the squad automatically qualified for the NCAA tournament, where they drew the University of Mary Washington in the
first round, losing in a tight 1-0 battle.
Men’s Soccer
After a special year for the team, winning the Liberty League championship just last fall, Coach Hood’s boys looked to return to the top after graduating seven seniors, including four who started in that Liberty League championship game. After a turbulent season where the Brewers went 9-5-3, the squad paved a path to the Liberty League championship against nationally ranked No.16 Hobart College. In a rainy battle in Geneva, New York, the squad pushed until the final whistle, ultimately losing 2-1. Despite the upsetting finish, the year was still notable, with Senior forward Jared Fiske being named Liberty League Player of the Year for the second time in his career. Joining Fiske, Arden Tabolski ’28, Otis Wildman ’26, Jackson Allen ’27 and Mauricio Mejia ’27 were named to all-Liberty teams.
Field Hockey
It was a special year for Vassar’s field hockey team, claiming their second league title in five years, flipping the script after a disappointing 2024 season. This time last year, the Brewers sat at the bottom of the Liberty League table after going 4-14 (1-6 in LL play). Bringing in 10 first-year recruits and welcoming Sydney Kovel ’26 as a student coaching assistant, the squad entered the season revitalized. Starting the season 4-5, the team entered Liberty League play without much momentum, but won their first three Liberty League matches, including one against nationally ranked No.25 Ithaca College. Earning a first-round bye in the Liberty League Championship tournament, the squad defeated William Smith in the semi-finals before overtaking Union College 4-2 in a dramatic championship game, featuring four of the six goals coming in the final 10 minutes. Winning the Liberty League, the squad automatically qualified for the NCAA tournament, where they faced Williams College in the first round. They lost a tough-fought battle 4-2. Sofia Beseth ’26, Karina Hoffman ’27 and Sophie Rosenblum ’28 earned All-Liberty League First Team honors alongside a coaching staff led by Annie Fowler, who was named Liberty League Coaching Staff of the Year.
Men’s Rugby
The men’s rugby team endured a rocky season, finishing with a 6-5 record after falling in the Tri-State conference championship 24-31 to the U.S. Massachusetts Maritime Academy. But the season was not without high points, with strong victories over the University of Albany and Montclair State University. The squad will look towards spring action.
Women’s Rugby
It was nothing new for Vassar’s women’s rugby team, continuing their reign of dominance over Division II women’s rugby. Vassar won their 10th Tri-State championship in an 88-5 domination over Fairfield University. The conference victory followed a perfect season where the Brewers pummeled one opponent after another. With the win, the Brewers qualified for the National College Rugby Playoffs in Georgetown, Delaware, where they won their first round matchups to punch their ticket to the semi-finals in Houston.
Women’s Golf
On Oct. 5, the women’s golf team rounded out fall action after a busy handful of matches. The squad finished last in all but one of their four matches in a challenging year for the Brewers. The team will look to get back onto the fairway in spring play.
Women’s Volleyball
The women’s volleyball team entered the season under their third coach in three years. The Brewers embraced their young core, with seven of their 16 players being first-years, but it was not just the rookies that got it done for the squad. Holland Kaplan ’27 and Maura McAusland ’27 led the squad in kills with 307 and 404, respectively. McAusland put together a spectacular year, hitting a strong .329 on 404 kills, with 240 digs and 24 blocks. Defensively, Ellie Kogan ’26, Francesca Medrano ’27 and Rebecca Gutierrez ’26 put together great 2025 campaigns. Winning eight of their first nine matches, the squad built up momentum heading into Liberty League play, where they went 5-4, good for a ticket to the Liberty League playoffs. The squad fell in the first round in a tight five-set match against Skidmore College. Despite a sour ending, the team’s future looks bright with a balanced crew of talented rising seniors and a hungry young core.
Men’s Cross Country
The men’s cross country team strung together another strong year, finishing fourth out of nine in the Liberty League championship meet before posting a top-ten finish out of 26 teams at the NCAA Mideast Regionals. It has been a long season for the Brewers, beginning in August and continuing through November over eight races. The strong performance has been a full team effort, led by Sean Miller ’27 and Max Frazee ’27, who both earned Liberty League first team honors. Now, the squad looks towards the NCAA DIII Championships in Spartanburg, South Carolina.
Women’s Cross Country
The Vassar women’s cross country team won the Liberty League crown for the third consecutive year this fall, with seven racers finishing in the top-20, including Haley Schoenegge ’27, Anika Mueller-Hickler ’26 and Adelaide Nyhan ’27 finishing second, fourth and fifth, respectively. Next, the squad travelled to St. Lawrence University for the Mideast Regional Championships, where they competed against highly touted competition. The team raced to fifth out of 25 total squads. The strong 2025 campaign is a part of an arduous season that began in hot Poughkeepsie in August and wraps up in a chilly November. Over the year, the runners garnered a handful of top-20 national rankings, peaking at No.16. The squad turns its attention to the NCAA DIII Championships in Spartanburg, South Carolina, this upcoming weekend. Across the board, Vassar sports have continued to dominate, with record-setting performances, matches and seasons raining in from teams across the department. Vassar College Director of Athletics Michelle Walsh could not be more excited about the performance of fall athletes. She told The Miscellany News, “It has been an absolutely outstanding fall for our teams! All six of our fall teams who have a playoff model advanced to their conference postseason [and] five of those six teams advanced to their conference championship games.” Walsh has cultivated an environment where student-athletes are driven to succeed in all areas of college life since joining Vassar in 2015. Student-athletes are getting it done in the classroom just as much as they are on the court, field or course.
The Miscellany Crossword Just a Number
By: Olivia Blank

ACROSS
1. Eccentric celebrity wellness brand
5. They keep vegetables moist at the grocery store
10. Raining ___ and dogs
14. First half of Tobias Funke’s job title in “Arrested Development”
15. Machu Picchu architects
16. What kept the princess awake, per a classic fairy tale
17. “Take that ___ blocker, girl!”, bit of Rachel Sennott red carpet advice
18. People who drive wedges
20. Colon or circle prefix
22. Talking truckers
23. *Every now and again
29. Namesakes of the Roman goddess of the moon
30. Winter Olympics event for those with a head for heights
31. Type of English whose speakers wear sweaters, not jumpers (abbr.)
32. *Where an impoverished person may reside, idiomatically
36. See 25D
40. Wholehearted affirmative, in Spain
41. *2014 Mac Demarco album
45. Opp. of down, to a cruciverbalist
46. Take it down a few notches
47. Curriculum ___
49. *Invention that was supposedly designed to help telegraph operators transcribe Morse Code (also, what I’m using to write this clue)
52. ___ Selassie, former Ethiopian leader 53. L, on IMLeagues
54. In Jungian psychology, the youthful, often repressed part of one’s psyche — or, a shared characteristic of this puzzle’s starred entries
58. Q follower?
62. “Don’t spill the beans” docs 63. “Moonlight” actress Janelle 64. Profs’ degrees
65. Tramp stamps, e.g.
66. Gang ___, iconic hip-hop duo
67. Outcome of some bargaining
DOWN
1. Go on and on and on and...
2. Loneliest number
3. Grain commonly found in the cereal aisle
4. 99.9% of the visible universe
5. Where Mr. Worldwide got his start 6. Decision-pending 7. Bio or chem
8. ___ kwon do
9. 9-digit ID that isn’t your 999
10. Meowing mimids
11. “Dial-___”, hotline to call when you want to hear some William Burroughs or Allen Ginsberg
12. Our planet, in France 13. Give some attitude
19. When Hamlet says “To be, or not to be”
21. UFO crew
23. Custardy, caramel-topped treats
24. Cuban music genre that’s slang for “party”
25. Shaquille whose autograph might make a 36A’s day
26. German “a”
27. ___ with Tracy Jordan, sketch show on “30 Rock”
28. Acorns that are all grown up
33. Cattle-catching rope
34. Mikey Madison got one for “Anora”
35. What you might feel after one too many espresso shots
37. Like a disassembled Mr. Potato Head, say
38. Enthusiastic fan
39. Highway maintenance agcy. in Nebraska or Nevada
42. Olympic gymnast Raisman
43. ___ Yak, Fizz alternative
44. Five-star
47. “I think, therefore I am” has two of them (abbr.)
48. Download on an Apple device
49. Post-lecture sesh
50. Be triumphant in
51. Winner of a landmark 1st Amendment case in 1972
52. Request from a stumped guesser
55. There are 100 in 1 m
56. Frank’s Red___
57. Garten who insists that “storebought is fine”
59. Grp. that includes Ducks and Penguins
60. Bob Dylan wrote one about Woody Guthrie
61. Snowden’s former org. Answers to last week’s crossword

Crossword Unplugged
By: Theo Burstyn-Paul