Women's History Month (Women of the Month) - 3/10

Nebraska native married high school sweetheart, spent three decades as a soldier ’s wife

Editor’s Note: This article originally ran in the Fort Cavazos Herald last fall.

CORYELL COUNTY — Since earning her master’s degree in 2018, longtime military spouse Cassandra Core-Holt has worked as a licensed marriage and family therapist associate and she remembers a time long ago when she and her U.S. Army pilot husband might have benefited from a little counseling.

“One issue military families have is when the soldier is away, the spouse takes over everything,” the Coryell County resident originally from Omaha, Nebraska, said. “When the soldier comes back, they have to go through a class – or they used to have to go through a class – that tells them, OK, when you try and re-integrate with your family, don’t criticize decisions the spouse has made “Re-integration is a difficult thing for a lot of people. You have to re-think your roles. If they have children, the wife is used to taking care of everything with the kids, and then the father wants to come in and maybe discipline or something like that, when things have already been running like a machine. They don’t know their place anymore.

“One of the first things that Mr. Holt did was criticize some

of my decisions. I had to remind him about that class he took,” she said, laughing.

Cassandra grew up in Omaha with two sisters and two brothers. Her father was a welder. She graduated from high school in 1981, and at that time, she did not have any solid plans lined out for the future. She had been dating a young man named Kelvin Holt for three years — 10th, 11th, 12th grades — and when they decided to go their separate ways after school, he decided to join the military.

“I was working and he was in the National Guard,” Cassandra said. “We had broken up – I think it was a mutual thing – and he joined the military to get away from me. He did not want to live in the same town I was in and see me with someone else

“We got back together before he left (for basic training), so him getting away from me didn’t work out. I was busy going to school and working, so I didn’t really think about it until he left. Then I was sad, but we stayed in contact.”

Kelvin headed to Fort Knox, Kentucky, in 1982, and the young couple got married the following year.

“He was in for about six months and he found out he was going to Germany,” Cassandra said. “So he came back to Omaha to visit me and said

PLEASE SEE WIFE, D4

WIFE

he wanted to get married. He said, ‘You need to plan a wedding.’ He did not ask me; he just assumed. He did ask my mother for permission to marry me, but he didn’t ask me. I still give him a hard time about that.”

Cassandra joined Kelvin in Germany

six months after the wedding. Over the next nearly-30 years, they were stationed at Fort Stewart, Georgia; Fort Rucker, Alabama; Fort Polk, Louisiana; Fort Carson, Colorado; three times at Fort Hood (now Fort Cavazos); twice in Germany; and Korea. Before he retired in 2012, CW4 Holt was deployed three times to Iraq (2003, 2007-09, 2011).

“It was scary, and I was lonely, but I survived it,” she said of those Middle East combat tours. “The worst was when

he went the first time. He was supposed to be gone a year, but they extended him for three months

“I helped with the FRG (family readiness group) and I had to call my (list of) spouses and tell them that the guys had gotten extended. I got yelled at, cursed at, and then after I hung up, I cried. Not because of them but because he had been extended.

“I volunteered with the FRG for the first two deployments, but I also volunteered at a place called Gold Star Family Support. We helped the spouses who had lost their spouse in battle. We had a meeting twice a month, Christmas parties, potluck dinners. We sent out Christmas cards, birthday cards, thinking about you cards.”

Throughout her husband’s career, Cassandra volunteered a lot, worked at military and civilian daycare facilities, and also found time to go to school. They first arrived in central Texas in 2004 and decided to retire here, but of all the places she has lived, Cassandra says Germany was her favorite.

“I loved Germany. I did get homesick sometimes, but I loved it. While we were there, we went to Italy, France, Belgium. Everything is right there.”

Along with work, Cassandra enjoys drawing and painting, arts and crafts, crossword puzzles, watching Jeopardy on television, and the occasional trip to an escape room, which involves finding clues and solving puzzles

“When we got here in 2004, I was volunteering and had been going to school all along,” she said. “In 2010, I started working on my bachelor’s in liberal arts. Then, I went and got my master’s in 2018. It’s a licensed marriage and family therapist associate, which means I am still under supervision. I love it, love it, love it.

“I deal with a lot of military couples and families. I’m able to identify with

what they’re going through because I went through some of the same things myself. When my husband had to work late, I didn’t get upset with him. He couldn’t help that. He had no control over that. A lot of spouses will get upset. Sometimes, the kids are having behavior issues because mother or father has been gone, deployed. Then, some of the guys are coming back with PTSD.

“When he got deployed the last time, he left November 2nd. On November 4th, my car wouldn’t start, my vacuum caught on fire, and the repair guy fell through the ceiling. I just sat on the floor and cried. When we got here, I had friends we knew from Germany, but they PCSed somewhere else, so I lost all my military friends. Well, I didn’t lose them. We stay in contact; we’re just scattered. Every time we moved, working in a military daycare, I had to start over. I couldn’t get promoted or anything because we moved every two or three years “I miss the military, but there were times when I really had to sacrifice When I was in school in Colorado, I had an art class and the teacher asked me to enter some of my work in a show, but I couldn’t because the movers were at our house, and they had already packed up my artwork. So I missed out on that opportunity. I was really upset because that could have gotten me a scholarship to art school in New York. But I was able to get over it.

“Overall, it was a good experience, and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I think it made me stronger. I think it made me more flexible. I look back at most everything with fondness. I made some great military spouse friends. A lot of them, I’ve known 20-something years, and I’m still in contact with them.

“My husband has lost friends overseas and here at home, and that was hard, but overall, I wouldn’t change it. I wouldn’t change those days for anything.”

Civil rights activist Naomi Barber King, a sister-in- law to the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., dies

THE ASSOC IATED PRESS

ATLANTA — Naomi Barber King, a civil rights activist who was married to the younger brother of the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr., has died at age 92.

She died in Atlanta on Thursday, according to family members who issued a statement through the A.D. King Foundation.

Naomi King established the organization in May 2008 with a mission of empowering youth and women and advancing strategies for nonviolent social change “She was a woman of quiet dignity, overcoming strength, and steadfast support to her husband, family, and circles of influence within and beyond Atlanta,” the statement said.

Naomi King was born in Dothan, Alabama, according to the foundation’s website. She and her mother, Bessie Barber, moved to Atlanta to “make a better living” for themselves. In 1949, King entered Spelman College and spent a year studying French. She later attended the University of Alabama and studied interior design, according

to the website She was married to the Rev. Alfred Daniel Williams King, a Baptist minister and civil rights leader she met after joining Ebenezer Baptist Church. The couple married in 1950 and had five children. A.D. King died in July 1969.

The couple supported Martin Luther King Jr., and his leadership in the Civil Rights Movement and were at his side during multiple historic events, including the 1963 March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom, one of the most famous political rallies in U.S. history

Naomi King published a book in 2014 titled, “A.D. and ML King: Two Brothers Who Dared to Dream.”

Known for her love of butterflies and affectionately called the “Butterfly Queen,” King set an example of courage, resilience and grace in the face of injustice, uncertainty and heartache, which were themes highlighted in a 2022 documentary about her life, according to the foundation.

She is survived by her daughter, Alveda King; her son, Derek King; and several grandchildren.