Lessons in Leadership from Serving Youth: Why Listening Became My Strongest Skill by Jett Harris of Fort Smith

As noted by Jett Harris of Fort Smith, I once thought leadership meant setting the pace and staying in control. A good leader should speak with confidence and keep everyone moving. When I began volunteering with youth, I expected to teach helpful skills and provide direction I did not expect the experience to change me. Yet it did, and it gave me lasting lessons in leadership I still rely on
During my first weeks of youth volunteering, I focused on structure I planned activities, made rules, and tried to keep the group quiet and focused. It did not work. Some kids joked around. Some challenged me Others stayed silent and pulled away I felt pressure to “handle it ” That struggle taught me early leadership lessons: control does not create respect. Respect comes from relationships.
I started to shift my approach. I used fewer commands and more questions. I asked what they liked, what they avoided, and what made school feel hard I listened without cutting them off I noticed something simple When I first heard it, behavior improved Volunteering with youth taught me lessons in leadership about safety. People open up when they feel safe from shame.
One day, a teen refused to join a group game and sat alone I almost pushed them to participate. Instead, I sat nearby and spoke softly. I said, “You can join when you’re ready.” After a few minutes, the teen asked if they could help keep score That small step mattered It showed me more leadership lessons: offering choice builds trust. Choice also builds confidence.
I also learned to lead with consistency Teens notice broken promises fast If I said I would bring supplies, I had to get them. If I said we would talk after the session, I had to follow through. Youth volunteering made this clear Reliability is a form of respect, and it is one of the strongest lessons in leadership I learned
Over time, my definition of leadership changed I now see leadership as service It means listening, staying calm, and keeping your word It means noticing small wins and cheering real effort. Volunteering with youth changed my perspective by showing me that influence starts with trust These leadership lessons did not come from being in charge They came from showing up and caring on purpose.