A spin on FamilY Traditions
By Linda Ligon, Family & Kids
When life progresses in a predictable pattern, filled with daily routines and family traditions, it provides kids with a sense of security and belonging. Setting aside time out of your busy schedule for favorite traditions that your kids enjoy is a small way of letting them know you love them. Here are some new traditions that Facebook influencer Arsalan Moin (@psychtreatment) recommends adding to your family’s routine.
Help kids focus on GratitudeThe Complaint Jar
Every time someone in your house complains, they put a quarter in the ‘Complaint Jar.’ At the end of the month, use the money for something fun together. Negativity becomes visible, and gratitude becomes profitable. The brain learns ‘What you focus on, you feed.’
Introduce new foods with The One Bite Rule
Start introducing new foods with a ‘one bite with no pressure’ policy. Tell your child that she can spit it out and make a face if she does not like it, but she has to try one bite. Research shows that repeated exposure to new foods without force reduces food anxiety and increases willingness to try new foods. Adventurous eating does not result from forcing your child to try new foods, it comes from low-stakes practice.
Take away the shame from mistakes – The Mistake Celebration
When someone messes up, announce it with fanfare. “We have a mistake to celebrate!” Then talk about what was learned from the mistake. Standford research shows that reframing failure into a learning experience and evidence of trying reduces shame and increases resilience.
Create a sense of belonging with Cultural Dinner Night
Select a country, try its music, food or words from its language. Newness fires curiosity, and curiosity is one of the brain's safest learning states. Thus, when families explore together, difference feels like connection and the world gets smaller.
Practice generosity with “Trade A Toy” Tradition
Before every birthday or holiday, choose one toy to donate to another child. Making space for something new requires letting go of something old. Research shows that when you practice generosity, it eventually becomes part of who you are and no longer feels like a sacrifice.
Teach Kids to Repair Things –
Fix it Friday
One night a week, tackle one broken thing together. It could be a wobbly chair, a door that does not lock properly, anything around the house that needs fixing. Teach kids that broken things do not automatically need to be replaced. They are fixable.
Role Reversal - Freaky Friday
Once a season, swap roles for one evening. The kids set the bedtime, parents ask for snacks. Role reversal builds empathy quickly, faster than any parent lecture on empathy ever could. Kids see how difficult it is to be in charge, and they will understand why they need to respect you and the house rules you have created.
Build momentum with visible success - The Weekly Win Wall
Dedicate a wall or poster board to weekly wins. Everyone writes or draws one thing they are proud of. Visible success creates momentum, and then your child’s brain starts scanning for more wins to add. As a result, achievement stops being random. It becomes a pattern your kids build on purpose.
Teach kids how to entertain themselves with The Boredom Rule
Every time your child says she is bored, enforce twenty minutes of doing absolutely nothing. This means a screen-free time during which she has to sit and figure out how to entertain herself. This teaches your child that under-stimulation is not punishment. Rather, it is the birthplace of great ideas.
HOO’s PICKS Take a Mom’s ‘Time Out’
Every mom deserves time to relax, connect with friends, and recharge. Whether you have a free morning or a full evening, here are some fun ways to enjoy a well-earned break.
Mahjong Meetups (columbus.bamgoodtime.com)
Join Mahjong with BAM Good Time for a fun, social experience. You can also play Midweek Mahjong on Wednesdays at Parker’s Pantry (9:30–11:30 AM, $5) or “Monday at the Garden” at the Columbus Botanical Gardens (9:30–11:30 AM, $5 members / $10 nonmembers).
Paint & Create
Get creative with a visit to Let’s Paint (letspainttoday2.com), where you can enjoy canvas painting, pottery painting, or pottery throwing classes. For a more casual experience, Bareware Pottery (bareware-pottery-craft-studiollc.square.site) offers a relaxed, drop-in setting for pottery painting, along with select pottery throwing classes—perfect for crafting and chatting with friends.
Stickers & Stamp Crafting (stickerandstampcolumbus.com)
Spend a cozy, creative outing at Sticker & Stamp, a Midtown craft shop that focuses on creativity and community. This unique space offers hands-on crafting classes and workshops where you can experiment with journaling,
HOO’s PICKS
stickers, stamps, and other artistic projects. It’s a welcoming environment for beginners and seasoned crafters alike, with a focus on fun, connection, and making something meaningful.
Outings & Entertainment
Plan a night out at RiverCenter (rivercenter.org) for concerts and events or enjoy a live performance at the Springer Opera House (springeroperahouse. org). It’s a great way to share a memorable experience with friends.
Dinner with Friends
Revisit your favorite date-night restaurants (familyandkidsga.com/just-4parents/date-night-in-columbus-ga) with your mom crew. Dress up, slow down, and enjoy uninterrupted conversation over a great meal.
Spa & Relaxation
Unwind with a spa visit at Callaway Resort and Gardens (callawaygardens. com), the Spa at Grand National in Opelika (rtjspatrail.com/spa/the-spaat-grand-national), or Caravails Day Spa (caravailsdayspa.com). A massage, facial, or manicure is the perfect way to recharge.
No matter what you choose, taking time for yourself helps you return refreshed and ready for the week ahead.
MOM VILLAGE find your
Motherhood can sometimes feel isolating, but finding your “village” can make all the difference. Whether you’re looking for friendship, support, fitness, or educational resources, the Columbus area offers a variety of mom groups to help you connect, grow, and thrive alongside other families.
The MomCo: Connection, Encouragement & Community
In collaboration with @ColGaWithKids
Whether you’re a new mom, a seasoned parent, or somewhere in between, there’s a group below that’s ready to welcome you. So pack up the diaper bag, grab the stroller, or just come as you are—your community is waiting.
The MomCo (formerly MOPS) brings moms together in a welcoming, supportive environment. Each group offers a mix of meaningful conversations, encouragement, and time to recharge. With multiple meeting locations and times, there’s an option for nearly every schedule. (themom.co)
• CityScape MomCo • 1st & 3rd Fridays | 9-11am /// MomCo of First Baptist Church Columbus • 2nd & 4th Wednesdays (Sept–May) | 5:45–7:15pm
• MomCo at St. Luke Church • 1st & 3rd Thursdays | 10-12pm /// Fort Benning MomCo • 2nd & 4th Tuesdays (mornings) or Wednesdays (evenings) 9-11am or 6–7:30pm
Fitness + Friendship: Moving Together
These groups combine exercise with community.
iStroll Ft Benning (istroll.co/fort-benning): A 60-minute, high-energy stroller workout designed by athletes for parents. Expect a mix of running, strength training, and fun, while your little one comes along for the ride.
S.L.A.M. Sweat Like a Mother (sweatlikeamother.com/columbus): More than just a workout, it’s a global community of moms lifting each other up, literally and figuratively. It offers playgroups for kids, moms’ night-out, fun challenges and races, plus social events and outings.
Support for Homeschool Families
LIGHT Homeschool Support Group (homeschoollight.com): LIGHT provides a strong network rooted in encouragement and shared resources. This Christian-based group offers curriculum guidance, group activities and field trips, legislative updates, plus prayer and community support.
Care for New Moms
St. Francis Emory Healthcare’s Breastfeeding Support Group (addevent.com/ event/KO26008669): Open to all moms, no matter where your baby was born. This welcoming group provides a safe space to ask questions, share experiences, and receive guidance. Babies are always welcome, and support is always judgment-free. Every Thursday | 9:30–11am
Opens NEw KIDS
Last month, the Columbus Parks and Recreation Department held a ribbon-cutting ceremony for the Kids Bike Park at Dinglewood Park, located at the intersection of 13th Street and Warren Williams Rd in Columbus.
The park is designed to help kids develop cycling skills in a safe, fun environment. Once kids have built their cycling skills, there are many cycling opportunities in the Columbus area, including the Dragonfly Trail and the Standing Boy Trails, where kids can enjoy using what they have learned.
Cycling is a fun family activity that gets kids outdoors and away from screens and is great exercise for everyone in the family. It is a low impact activity that helps build lower body and core strength and helps maintain bone health without placing a large amount of stress on joints.
At the Dinglewood Kids Bike Park, young children learning to ride can try out their bikes on the toddler track, which is a kid-oriented loop trail that is designed to feel like a fun playground. A skills
By Linda Ligon, Family & Kids
track allows kids of all experience levels to work on their biking skills and has features such as skinnies (narrow features you balance on while riding down them), rolling ramps, a trail and ladder bridges.
The bike park also includes a pump track. A pump track is a type of bike path that allows the rider to gain speed and momentum through body movements rather than from pedaling. It consists of a series of rollers and berms. A roller is a series of smooth, rounded small hills built into the straight sections of the track. Rollers are used to generate speed by a ‘pumping’ technique, where the rider unweights their bike over the top and pushes down on the bike in the troughs. A berm is a banked, curved corner that has a high outer wall. Berms provide support and traction for the rider and allow the rider to maintain high speed. The Dinglewood Kids Bike Park has both a modular pump track that is a looped sequence of 2 to 4 foot rollers and berms, as well as a liner pump track.
For more info, visit parks.columbusga.gov
By Sal Woessner Chattahoochee Valley Libraries
TSummer Reading Summer Reading is back!
he Chattahoochee Valley Libraries’ 2026 Summer Reading Challenge, “Unearth a Story,” invites readers of all ages to dive into books and log their reading—on their own or together with family—to help the community reach an exciting goal of 2.6 million minutes read. Along the way, participants can earn fun prizes just by keeping track of their reading.
Summer reading is more than just a fun way to pass the time; it’s a crucial way for kids to keep their minds active during the months away from school. Research shows that reading over the summer helps children maintain and even improve their vocabulary, critical thinking, and reading comprehension skills. Most importantly, cultivating a habit of reading during the summer nurtures a lifelong love of learning, helping children see books not just as schoolwork, but as a source of excitement and adventure!
To make tracking reading simple, participants can use Beanstack, a digital reading platform accessible from most smartphones and tablets via the mobile app, or from any computer or laptop with an internet connection. Beanstack makes it easy to log reading minutes, monitor progress,
HOO’s HEALTHY
Inflammatory Bowel Disease (or IBD) is a group of diseases that cause chronic inflammation in the gastrointestinal tract and includes disorders such as Crohn’s disease and Ulcerative colitis (UC). IBD occurs when healthy tissue in the gastrointestinal tract is mistakenly attacked by the immune system. It is not known why this occurs, but researchers have found evidence that may suggest a connection between IBD and certain gene mutations.
When someone has Crohn’s disease, ulcers can appear in any part of the GI tract, anywhere from the mouth to the rectum. However, it typically involves sores appearing in the upper part of the large intestine and in the small intestine. A patient with UC will typically have sores that start in the rectum and spread to the colon.
Symptoms of IBD generally include intense stomach pain and cramps, fatigue, diarrhea, blood in the stool and unintended weight loss. While IBD symptoms usually first appear between the ages of 18-35, the first symptoms can appear at any age. When IBD affects children, it is sometimes called very early onset IBD.
By
and earn prizes—all in one convenient place. Paper reading logs are also available at any Library branch.
To kick things off, area Libraries are hosting Beanstack Bonanza, a special early registration event throughout the month of May. Sign up during Beanstack Bonanza and enjoy a sweet reward—a packet of jellybeans! Packets are available only while supplies last, limited to one per registered family member, and must be picked up in person at a library branch—so be sure to stop by early!
How It Works:
• Download the Beanstack app.
• Register for the 2026 Summer Reading Challenge!
• Stop by any Chattahoochee Valley Libraries branch.
• Pick up your jellybeans!
For more information about all the exciting programs and events happening this summer, participants can visit their local Library or go online at cvlga.org
What is:
IBD
The symptoms of IBD often follow a ‘flare up and remission’ pattern, where the symptoms last for weeks or months but then disappear or become less severe, only to flare up some time later. A combination of tests is used to diagnose IBD.
• Colonoscopy is the primary test used to view the entire colon and can also be used to view parts of the small intestine. During the procedure, a sample of tissue may be taken to send for biopsy. Other types of endoscopy tests may also be ordered.
• Blood tests look for signs of infection, anemia or signs of inflammation. IBD causes anemia through intestinal blood loss.
• Stool tests are used to differentiate between IBD and other conditions such as IBS.
• Imaging studies may also be ordered.
IBD is a chronic lifelong disease that can sometimes lead to serious complications, such as colon cancer. Treatment for IBD includes medications, dietary changes and sometimes surgery, with the goal being to put IBD in remission.
Linda, Ligon, Family & Kids
SuperpowerS
SuperpowerS ThaT Build ResiLience
By Susie Olive-Allison, LPC, Pastoral Institute
From pandemics to protests to getting into middle school with their besties, monsters aren’t confined to the space under the bed anymore. Worries are part of normal child development. Persistent, overwhelming worries can turn into monsters threatening academic, social, and emotional well-being. Identifying worries is fairly easy, but keeping these worries from becoming anxiety monsters can prove challenging.
Research consistently shows that protective factors reduce the likelihood of children developing chronic anxiety by helping them effectively manage their worries. Think of protective factors as superpowers helping build resilience and healthy emotional development. So, what are these superpowers? And how do we get them?
The most powerful protective factor is having secure, supportive relationships with caregivers Feeling safe, understood, and valued by a trusted adult equips children to manage stress. Consistent, emotionally available caregivers help children learn to tolerate and work through difficult feelings. Even when experiencing challenges away from home, knowing a trusted adult will listen and offer guidance can decrease anxiety.
Relationships also provide opportunities for emotion-focused guidance. Children learn by watching and mimicking others. Caregivers who help children identify, label, and talk about their feelings provide tools for understanding emotions. Rather than dismissing a child or telling them to “stop worrying,” validate their concern and offer suggestions on ways they can cope. When adults model problem-solving and healthy emotional expression, children learn how to manage big emotions.
Encourage autonomy and mastery. Provide opportunities for children to try new things, solve problems independently, and take age-appropriate risks. Participation in sports, arts, academic teams, and hobbies fosters a sense of self-efficacy. This sense of capability can reduce feelings of helplessness that often accompany anxiety.
Problem-solving and coping skills are behaviors and strategies that prepare us for challenges.
Practicing deep breathing, relaxation techniques, and flexible thinking with children helps them prepare for inevitable worries. When problems arise, help them challenge negative thought patterns (e.g., “I can’t” or “it’s too hard”) by teaching them to question whether their thoughts are true or helpful. Equip them with tools to face fears rather than offering a way out. Successfully managing challenges reinforces confidence and resilience.
While they’re trying new things, predictable, structured environments provide a safe framework for working within expectations and boundaries. Consistent routines for sleep, meals, school, and family time help children feel secure and reduce uncertainty. Children are less likely to perceive ordinary situations as threatening or overwhelming when daily life feels stable and predictable.
Positive social connections outside the family also strengthen resilience. Supportive social, academic, spiritual, and cultural environments offer a sense of belonging and acceptance. Cultivating safe relationships provides opportunities for emotional support, cooperation, and the practice of social skills. Communicate with teachers, coaches, mentors, and other parents about your child’s challenges and strengths to build a team that responds to your child’s emotional needs, reinforcing a sense of safety and competence.
Healthy lifestyle habits like adequate sleep, physical activity, and nutrition, and reasonable limits on screen time, support both physical and emotional regulation. Children can better handle stress and emotional challenges when their bodies are well-regulated. Finally, as they develop new superpowers, teach them the magic of “yet.” If they express frustration with skills and strategies by saying “I don’t know how,” answer with “yet.” Remind them that honing superpowers takes time and practice.
Helping children with worries is less about vanquishing monsters and more about creating safe spaces where they can build resilience, develop coping skills, and experience supportive relationships. When these protective factors are present, children are better equipped to navigate life’s uncertainties and grow into emotionally healthy adults.
p a r t y t o d a y ! p a r t y t o d a y ! p d y
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U N & I N T E R A C T I V E
P A R T Y T H E M E S !
3 h o u r s o f re s e r ve d s p a c e
2 0 - m i n u t e s t a f f- l e d a c t i v i t y
M
Dining Deals for Kids
MONDAY
Sapo’s
5pm until close: free kid's meal with adult entrée, dine in only
tuesday
Denny’s
4-10pm: Up to two free kids entrées with adult entrée for kids 10 and under
The Food Mill
Make it a family night! Buy a family meal, get 2 kids meals for free!
Ruby Tuesday
5-10pm: Kids 12 and under eat free with adult entrée
wednesday
Your Pie
Kid's meals half off with adult entrée
Crumbl
Free mini cookie with purchase of regular cookie
Does your restaurant have a special offer for kids?!
Let us know and we can promote it here for free to 20K local parents monthly.
Email it to us at: Tammy@familyandkidsga.com
Thursday
Tuesday's Street Tacos & Burritos
Free kids meal with adult purchase; dine-in only
friday
Denny’s
4-10pm: Up to two free kids entrées with adult entrée for kids 10 and under
Ruby Tuesday
5-10pm: Kids 12 and under eat free with adult entrée
SUNDAY
Vallarta Mexican Restaurant
Free kids' meal with the purchase of adult entrée
everyday
Bruster’s Ice Cream
Kids under 40” get free baby cone
McAlister’s
Kid’s meals are $2.79 with dine-in order
All locations are Columbus, GA unless noted. Specials are subject to change without notice, so please verify them directly before dining. Send kids deals to Tammy@FamilyAndKidsGA.com.
May
2 Peachy Spring Fling. 11am. The Peach Shoppe & Co; Facebook.com
2 Columbus PorchFest & After-Party. Noon-9pm. Historic District & Chattahoochee Promenade; columbusporchfest.com
2 Simple Step: Play. Ages 0-5. 10am. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
2 Symphony on the Sand. 5pm. Callaway Gardens; 800-CALLAWAY
2 Astronomy Night. 8pm. Coca-Cola Space Science Ctr; facebook.com
2-3 X-Marks the Spot. 1111:30am. Springer Opera House; 706327-3688
2-3 Annual Spring Cotton Fair. 8am-5pm. Gay; thecottonfair.com
3 Annual Uptown Columbus Strut the Hooch Parade. 11am-1:30pm . 1100 Block of Broadway; visitcolumbusga.com
6
5th Annual Mother’s Day Tea Party. 6-8pm. $45. RSVP. Hudson’s at Main; 706507-5384
7 Sight Word Support. Grades K-3. 3-5pm. RSVP. Mildred L. Terry Library; 706-243-2782
8 Midland Commons Concert Series, "The Active Ingredients." 6-10pm. 6835 Midland Commons Blvd; 706-987-3723
9Mother's Day Needle Felting Workshop. 10am-3pm. $5 + museum admission; Historic Westville; 706-221-9330
9 Second Saturday Tour. 11am. Historic Westville; 706-221-9330
9 CROSSROADS Folk Art Festival 2026. 10am-6pm. Rose Hill Heights Park; columbuscollectivemuseums.com
9 Columbus Children’s Book Festival. 10-3pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2689
12
Simple Steps: Play. Ages 0-5. 10am. North Columbus Library; 706-7482855
12 After School Art Break. 2:304:30pm. Columbus Museum; 706-7482562
12 Kid’s Art Studio. Ages 5-12. 4pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
14 Sight Word Support. Grades K-3. 3-5pm. RSVP. Mildred L. Terry Library; 706-243-2782
15 Family Saturday at the Museum. 10am-Noon. Columbus Museum; 706748-2562 ext 6520
4 Teen Takeover: Movie Mondays. 2pm. South Columbus Library; 706-683-8805
5 Simple Steps: Play. Ages 0-5. 10am. North Columbus Library; 706-748-2855
5 Little Sprouts. 10am & 2:30pm. Ages 0-5. $5/family. Columbus Botanical Garden, 706-327-8400
5 Pony Bead Party. Ages 5-12. 4pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
9 19th Annual Picnic in the Garden. 11am-2pm. Hills & Dales Estate, LaGrange; 706-882-3242
9 Midland Mix Market. 11am. Midland Commons; facebook.com
9-10 Voices of the Valley Children’s Chorus “Peace Seekers.” Sat 7pm & Sun 2pm. RiverCenter; 706-649-7243
9-10 X-Marks the Spot. 1111:30am. Springer Opera House; 706327-3688
17 Columbus Lions Indoor Football Game. 7-10pm. Columbus Civic Center; ticketmaster.com
19 Pony Bead Party. Ages 5-12. 4pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
19 Teen Takeover: Anime & Manga Club. 4:30pm. South Columbus Library; 706-683-8805
22-24 Masters Water Ski & Wakeboard Tournament. Callaway Gardens; 800-CALLAWAY
23 Bugs on the Hooch 2026. 8am5pm. Free. National Civil War Naval Museum; 706-527-7365
23 Simple Step: Play. Ages 0-5. 10am. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
Events
23 Midland Commons Concert Series, "Relative Sound." 6-10pm. 6835 Midland Commons Blvd; 706-987-3723
26 Teen Crafternoon Cinema. 2pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2811
26 Crafty Kids: Dinosaur Masks. Ages 6-11. 2pm. South Columbus Library; 706-683-8805
26 Kid’s Art Studio. Ages 5-12. 4pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
28
Seedling Storytime. 10am. $5$7. Ages 0-2. Columbus Botanical Garden; 706-327-8400
28 Teen Crafternoon: You Had To Be There. 2pm. Columbus Library; 706-2432811
28 Rock ‘N’ Roar! A Summer Discovery Series. Ages 6-11. 3pm. North Columbus Library; 706-748-2855
28 Uno, Dos, Tres Crafts! Ages 4-8. 3pm. Mildred L. Terry Library; 706-2432782
30 Barks & Blues Music Festival. 3-10pm. $10. Woodruff Riverfront Park; 706-565-0035
Weekly Events
MONDAY
Simple Steps Storytime: Babies & Toddlers. Ages 0-36 mo. 10am. Columbus Public Library; 706-243-2813 (Not 5/25)
TUESDAY
Simple Steps Storytime. Babies & Toddlers. Ages 0-24 mo. 10am; Preschoolers. Ages 3-5. 11am. North Columbus Library; 706748-2855. (Not 5/5th, 5/12th )
Story Time with Grammy Trish. 11am. Columbus Bound Bookshop; 706-243-1034
THURSDAY
Simple Steps Storytime: Families. Ages 0-5. 10am. Columbus Public Library; 706-2432813
Simple Steps Storytime: Families. Ages 0-5. 11am. South Columbus Library; 706-6838805
29 Grannycore Summer: Puzzles & Games. Families. 4pm. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
30 Simple Step: Play. Ages 0-5. 10am. Columbus Library; 706-243-2813
30 Spring Closet Cleanout. 11am-3pm. Columbus Trade Center; 706.327.4522
Get On Board With Board Games: Chess & More. Families. 4:30pm. Mildred L. Terry Library; 706-243-2782
WEDNESDAY
Simple Steps Storytime. Ages 0-5. 11am. Mildred L. Terry Library; 706-243-2782
Discovery Hub. Ages 3-5. 11am. Columbus Public Library; 706-243-2813
LEGOS® in the Library. Families. 4pm. Columbus Public Library; 706-243-2813
FRIDAY
Simple Steps Storytime: Rhythm & Rhyme. Ages 0-5. 10am. Columbus Public Library; 706-243-2813
Friday Night Concert Series. 6-9pm. HIgh Side Market; alwaysuptown.com
SATURDAY
Market Days. 9am-Noon. 900, 1000 & 1100 blocks of Broadway; uptowncolumbusga. com
Please call ahead to confirm event dates, times and age appropriateness, in case changes were made after the info was obtained.
We invite her to reconnect nature, while enjoying a sup team atmosphere that nur leadership, encouragement friendships that will last a li
• Riding - English, Western, & Jumping
• Swimming • Heated Pool • Ropes Course
• Climbing Tower • Nature Exploration
• Sports • Soccer • Basketball
• Gymnastics • Beach Volleyball • Tennis
• Canoeing • Archery • Knitting
• Voice & Music • Cheerleading
• Dance • Chorus • Drama
• Arts & Crafts • CIT Program
• Campfires every night
• Riverview Refinement & More!
PRESCHOOL & SPECIAL NEEDS
June 15-19 9AM - 12PM
KINDERGARTEN -FIFTH GRADE
June 22-26
9AM - 12PM
Summer Camps & Activities
Summer Camps & Activities
Summer Camps & Activities
Summer Camps & Activities
By Linda Ligon, Family & Kids
When teens have a falling out with friends or a disagreement with a family member, they need to know how to take the necessary steps to repair the relationship and move forward. Unlike small kids, who will quickly apologize for infractions such as taking a toy away from a friend but then resume playing as if nothing had happened, teens are very self-conscious and worry about what others think of them. This can make repairing friendships difficult.
Why it is hard for teens to repair friendships
Parents and teachers start trying to teach kids to resolve conflicts from an early age by forcing an apology. For small kids, saying something like ‘Taking that toy was not nice, how would that make you feel?' Tell him you are sorry works quite nicely. Small kids do not have the fear of feeling judged by their peers like teens do. To teens, admitting a mistake will make their peers think less of them, and it seems better to just walk away from a damaged friendship rather than risking embarrassment by apologizing and admitting their mistakes.
Also, when a conflict with a friend arises, teens tend to get highly emotional and reactive, making it difficult to think clearly about what is going on. A teen may easily misunderstand something a friend said and overreact to it, escalating the situation and leading to words being said on both sides that were inappropriate. The conversation may turn into an angry exchange, where the teens argue and try to assign blame instead of trying to repair the relationship and moving forward.
Unfortunately, apologizing is often seen even by adults as a sign of weakness or as conceding to the other person and telling them that they have ‘won’ the dispute. However, apologizing is actually a way for your child to show that he has integrity and is willing to take responsibility for his own actions.
How to teach your teen to repair friendships
As parents, we hope our teen will grow to be an adult who has integrity and can successfully maintain relationships with others by apologizing for mistakes and then working to repair the relationship. Here are some ways to help your child take responsibility for his own behavior and take the first step towards mending a damaged relationship by apologizing.
u Model this behavior yourself. It is hard to have to go through the uncomfortable process of admitting to someone you made a mistake. When your kids see you do this skillfully, they will understand that it is not a sign of weakness but rather a sign of strong character to admit a mistake and apologize. When you apologize, make sure you use wording that helps the apology sound sincere and meaningful.
u Emphasize that apologizing to a friend does not mean you are ‘giving up and letting them win.’ When you are trying to repair a friendship, you are not trying to assign blame and determine who ‘won’ and who ‘lost’ the dispute. Instead, the apology is an opportunity to say you are sorry for your action, discuss feelings and then move forward with repairing the friendship.
u Healing a relationship takes time. Help your kids understand that just because they apologize to a friend, it does not mean the relationship will immediately return to normal. When trust has been betrayed and feelings hurt, it is going to take time to gain the friend’s trust back. It takes work from everyone involved to repair a relationship, and it requires empathy and a willingness to listen to others to heal the hurt feelings.
