WEDDING & BRIDAL S upplement
JUNE 28, 2014
I Love Thee to the Depth, Breadth and Height My Soul Can Reach WHAT’S INSIDE ■ Unique Filipino Traditions Make Weddings More Meaningful ■ Celebrating Weddings, The American Way ■ Love Is Worth It! ■ Here Comes the Wedding Planner ■ Bridal Showers and Other Wedding Festivities ■ Casablanca Bridal & Formals: Reaching the Pinnacle of Success ■ Timeless Advice For Making Marriages Last ■ Bridal Gowns Fashion Collections for 2015 ■ Wedding Pulse ■ Before And After the Wedding: Marriage Preparation Helps..... ■ The Perfect Honeymoon / Wedding Traditions From Around the World ■ Bridal Beauty 101
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ew things are as beautiful, or as moving as a wedding, where a man and a woman pledge their eternal love for each other. It is a day they will remember for the rest of their lives. For couples, June has always been the most popular month of the year for weddings—hence the term “June Bride.” For brides-to-be looking for helpful advice and information on planning for their big day, look no further than our special Wedding & Bridal Supplement. May you have an absolutely perfect wedding day and fulfilling marriage! ►COVER STORY, S2
S2 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT
COVER STORY
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Unique Filipino Traditions Make Weddings More Meaningful By Edna Bautista, Ed.D., C.W.S.
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s engaged couples begin their future together, many are honoring the past by incorporating cultural customs in their weddings. While Western ways are the norm nowadays, adding some Filipino traditions would make the marriage celebration more meaningful and memorable.
Invitations The wedding invitation is the official document that announces when and where the couple is planning to marry. The design also indicates the color scheme, theme and style of the event. Because Filipinos are very family-oriented, the names of the couple’s ninongs and ninangs (godparents/sponsors) are included with those of the parents, bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girls, ring/coin/bible bearers, officiant, etc., making the stationery ensemble a very informative listing of “who’s who” in the entire entourage.
candle, arrhae (13 coins), cord and veil (read more about kasalan customs in later paragraphs). Choosing whom to include as principal and secondary sponsors may be motivated by socio-economics, as some couples seek to elevate their status in the community by being associated with successful people. Parental pressure in picking the participants ensures that family friendships are maintained.
Wedding Wear A white wedding gown is standard, but a cream-colored terno with its notable butterfly-style sleeves is a traditional alternative. Fashionable Filipiñana brides Entourage Several sets of ninongs may also wear a Maria and ninangs are chosen as Clara dress with panuelo or marriage role models for the alampay (shawls) or kicouple, while others are se- mona. Appropriate acceslected to sponsor ceremo- sories include pearls (from nial symbols, such as the the Philippines’ national
nickname, Perlas ng Silanganan, or Pearls of the Orient Seas). Tuxedos and suits are classic attire for grooms and the male members of the entourage. But in tropical weather, they can keep cooler by wearing a barong tagalog, a thin and transparent, delicately woven shirt with intricate embroidery, sometimes made from jusi (pineapple fiber).
Flowers The Philippines’ national flower, sampaguita (or pikake in Hawaiian), is a natural choice for Filipino weddings. With its intoxicating fragrance, the bud and blooms of the white jasmine can be made into beautiful bouquets, boutonnieres, corsages and local-style leis (neck garlands) and haku (head wreaths). Other favorite flowers include rosal (gardenia), camia (ginger) and azahar (orange blossoms). The rose continues to be popular as well. Some Filipina Catholic brides present an extra bouquet to the statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary, also titled as Rosa Mystica (Mystical Rose), with the hope that they could follow her example of being a virtuous wife and good mother. Kasalan Customs Spanish colonization has influenced the Filipino faith and culture, and some of the kasalan (wedding) customs are manifested in various rituals during a Catholic-Christian ceremony. The candle ceremony
symbolizes Jesus Christ, the Light of the World, and His presence in their marriage. The candle sponsors (sometimes the couple’s parents, if not a ninong/ninang or family representative), light the bride and groom’s candles. Then the couple takes the respective candles and lights a larger, third middle candle as a sign of unity. Three candles, like the Holy Trinity, are a reminder that “marriage takes three” to be complete—bride, groom and God. The coin ceremony symbolizes the sharing of all thy worldly goods for richer or poorer between husband and wife. The coin sponsors, who carry the couple’s treasure, present the officiant with arrhae (a word derived from the Spanish word arras, meaning “earnest money”). The officiant blesses the 13 coins (the number representing Jesus Christ and His apostles) and trickles them into the groom’s cupped hands and in turn trickles them into his bride’s cupped hands. The coins are saved later as a memento of the occasion.
The veil ceremony symbolizes humility and that the groom promises to protect his bride and that God promises to help them shoulder any burdens the couple may have in their marriage. The veil sponsors, who help clothe the couple as one, drape a veil on the shoulders of the groom and on the bride’s head. The yugal (nuptial cord) ceremony symbolizes the bride and groom “tying the knot.” The cord sponsors, who help bind the couple together forever, place the loops of the cord (silken lasso, strands of flowers or special rosary) over the couple’s heads. The loops are tied in a figure eight, which is also the mathematical sign for infinity.
Transportation With a caravan of cars transporting the entourage, the newlyweds ride off after the ceremony to the reception in limousines or luxury vehicles with horns loudly beeping for joy, the sounds reminiscent of the noisy jeepneys in the Philippines. A simpler yet romantic wedding transportation is a (continued on page S3)
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S3
COVER STORY FILIPINO... (from page S2)
kalesa or caromata (horsedrawn carriage) for the “king and queen of the day”.
Handaan Handaan (wedding reception) is the finest fiesta in honor of the newlyweds. Lechon (roast pig) is traditionally included in the buffet, along with other favorite Filipino foods (lumpia, adobo, seafood, fresh fruit and vegetables). Some reception venues have strict policies about bringing in additional menu items, so check whether they allow at least some specialty desserts as a supplement to the wedding cake (a symbol of the sweet life of marriage). If extra sweets can be served, offer guests leche flan (custard), ube (purple yam) or coconut-flavored rice cakes (bibingka, suman, puto, etc.). Rice represents prosperity since
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
it is a staple (“may the new family unit never go hungry”) and is also considered a symbol of fertility because the crop produces many grains.
“Mabuhay” TOAST During handaan, a toast is given in honor of the newlyweds. Champagne and wine are popular drinks, but lambanóg (coconut liquor) or tuba (fermented palm juice) can give guests a spirited taste of the Philippines. Multilingual toasts (English and in the families’ vernacular) may be proposed and led by the best man, fathers of the newlyweds or ninongs. A popular and participative tradition entails the leader raising his glass and shouting “Mabuhay!” three times. Everyone responds “Mabuhay!” each time, then toasts each other and drinks their beverages. The
word “Mabuhay!” is an allpurpose greeting; the number three, again, is a sacred number representing the Holy Trinity.
fully symbolic lovebirds’ flight toward heaven is a lucky omen.
Dancing Dancing provides a Favors and Love Birds form of entertainment durCapiz (pearlized, flat ing the reception. Guests shells) favors are distinctive always enjoy watching tramementos at Filipino wed- ditional folk dances, such ding receptions, again as the tinikling (bamboo showcasing the craftsman- dance), salakot and subli ship from the Pearl of the (hat dances), sakuting Orient Seas. (stick dance), binasuan Another unique Filipino (balancing candle act) or wedding tradition is the re- other tribal-inspired perleasing of two white doves formances. (a male and female pair) by The newlyweds themthe newlyweds. The peace- selves might do the money
or dollar dance. Guests may opt to donate a little extra cash to help the couple defray honeymoon costs or build their savings account. When they come forward to pin the bills on the newlyweds’ attire, it gives the guests an opportunity to greet the couple in person and offer their personal congratulations once more. For this reason, the Filipino money dance is a very popular custom and other ethnic groups in Hawaii have adapted and incorporated it in their weddings as well.
Heritage Honeymoon The newlyweds could consider going on a heritage honeymoon to the Philippines to relax with relatives who were unable to attend the wedding in Hawaii, take tours to historic and vacation sites or simply rediscover their roots.
LIFESTYLE
1,001 Wedding Ideas at the Philippine Wedding Summit Say I do: There are over 300 exhibitors at the Philippine Wedding Summit, ongoing until June 29, at the ground floor, SMX Mall of Asia.
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ANILA, Philippines - Themes & Motifs brings together wedding professionals not only from the Philippines, but also from the US, Malaysia, Indonesia, Dubai and Australia at the 9th Philippine Wedding Summit (PWS) ongoing until June 29 at the ground floor, SMX, Mall of Asia. At the PWS, 1,001 ideas for planning weddings are offered. Should the bride’s gown be white or ecru? Will it be a white fondant cake with dainty gumpaste flowers or a whim-
sical art cake? Must the bouquet be made of the traditional fresh roses or calla lilies? How about the novel idea of succulents for a bouquet. More than 300 exhibitors will satisfy every whim and fancy of the bride-and-groom to be, their parents and anyone else who has a say in the wedding. Highlights this year are food-tasting event presented by Hizon’s Catering with its new culinary experts concocting wedding menus. Smart Shot Studio offers special bundled rates for photo and video packages, while Goldenhills
Jewelry offers discounts on wedding and engagements rings on top of raffle prizes worth more than P150,000. Free career enhancement seminars will be held for wedding suppliers. Speakers include Rita Neri (wedding planning); Henry Pascual (event styling); Mary Kay expert (corporate image and skin care); and Chinkee Tan (financial success planning). Every P1,000 booked during the Philippine Wedding Summit entitles one to a raffle coupon for a honeymoon trip to Boracay. All non-winning entries will automatically qualify for the grand draw of the Paris & Diamonds Promo to be held at the 25th Grand Celebration of Wedding Expo Philippines in September. Hourly raffle prizes donated by exhibitors will also be given away throughout the event with the announcement of winners to be done via Twitter (#themesandmotifs) and Facebook (/themesand-
motifs). All online pre-registrants to the PWS are automatically issued a wedding website with Facebook integration, which they can customize to contain their very own albums of photos, videos, and blog. Soon-to-weds can accept well wishes and greetings from their family and friends from all over world through
the “Send Us Your Wish” module of their wedding website. They may also upload photos of the members of their entourage to the “Our Entourage” page to help break the ice among them even before the wedding date. The free admission ticket to PWS can be downloaded from a registrant’s wedding website. (www.philstar.com)
S4 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE
FEATURE
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Celebrating Weddings, The American Way By Teresita Bernales, Ed.D.
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m e r i c a n w e d dings are as div e r s e a s t h e c o u p l e s w h o come together to f o r e v e r s h a r e their lives. Most traditional American weddings take place in churches with family and friends who join in the joyous occasion. Other couples opt to hold their wedding ceremony on a beach or in a garden. Most U.S. wedding traditionally follow the “white weddings” type which originates from the white color of the bride's wedding dress, but refers to an entire wedding routine. Listed below are common wedding traditions and customs in the U.S.
June Brides In 2012, there were more than 2.1 million weddings in the U.S. Of that amount, 17 percent were held in June, making it the most popular month of the year for couples to tie the knot. The month of June is named after Juno, the Roman goddess of marriage and childbirth. The Romans believed that Juno would bring prosperity and happiness to all who were wedded in her month. In ancient times, it was practical for brides to marry in June, since they would most likely give birth to their first children in spring, which gave them enough time to physically recover before the fall harvest. It also meant that children born in spring would have an increased chance of surviving the long and often lean winter months. For Christians, June is also the end of Lent and the arrival of warmer weather. It signaled a time to remove winter clothing and partake in one’s annual bath. During the 1400s and 1500s, June was considered the time to come outdoors after a long winter and bath communally. Marrying when one was clean was considered a sign of a good beginning.
White Wedding Dress In the U.S., the traditional custom of the bride wearing a white-colored dress began during the Victorian era when Queen Victoria broke convention and wore a white wedding dress for her royal wedding. Prior to that, white was considered inappropriate for a royal wedding but the queen’s dress popularized white wedding gowns and the tradition caught on. Brides back then wore the best clothes they had or would buy the most expensive new clothes they could afford. After Victoria’s wedding, gold dresses or gold threaded dresses also became popular with the royals while other brides would wear white or also pastel dresses that usually reflected their social status. The color white was intended to symbolize purity and a white face veil was worn with the dress to symbolize virginity. Following strict “White Wedding” tradition, a white dress and veil are not worn for the second or third wedding after becoming a widow or a divorcee. Wedding Cake A gorgeous wedding cake is often the centerpiece of a wedding and is usually situated in a place of honor. The wedding cake is not just dessert to be served to guests during the reception. The cake is cut together by the couple who then exchanges bites. This is considered the first act that the couple does together as husband and wife. Wedding cakes are also usually white to symbolize purity. In ancient Rome, the typical wedding cake was a loaf of
bread that was broken over the bride’s head. Guests would then scramble for the crumbs due to superstitious beliefs about good luck for those fortunate enough to bring home the crumbs which were then placed under one’s pillow to enhance fertility. Saving a portion of the wedding cake is an old tradition that some U.S. couples still practice. Couples freeze the top portion of their wedding cake and thaw it out on their first anniversary to share with one another.
Old, New, Borrowed, Blue “Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue ... and a silver sixpence in your shoe.” This Victorian rhyme lists traditions that are thought to bring good luck to the bride. No one is really sure when the custom started but it has survived the centuries and coup l e s t o d a y a r e s t i l l incorporating this custom into their weddings. “Something old” represents guests at the ceremony who are already married, while “something new” represents the newlyweds and the beginning of their new life together. “Something borrowed” is usually an item borrowed from a happily married wife such as her veil or her mother’s own wedding dress. The “something blue” represents love and fidelity. And a “silver sixpence in your shoe” is usually a silver coin tucked into her wedding slipper.
time when it was more common for marriages to be arranged by families. Until recently, there was very little romance involved with weddings which were usually business contracts between the bride’s father and the family of the groom. The bride and groom had very little to say. Women were considered their fathers’ property and would be “given away” by their fathers to the groom’s family during the wedding ceremony. Because it would be embarrassing if the groom backed out before the ceremony if he didn’t like what he saw, the pair was kept separate. Today, couples interpret this tradition in their own way—some honor it, while others prefer to shake off their pre-ceremony nerves together. Besides, it’s also a good time to take photos.
Invitations and Gifts Invitations are sent to guests usually several months before the wedding. Receiving an invitation does not impose obligations on the invitee other than promptly accepting or declining the invitation, and offering congratulations to the couple. The purpose of inviting guests is to have them witness a couple’s marriage ceremony and vows. Gifts for the wedding couple are optional, although most guests give at least some small gift as a gesture of appreciation for being invited and good wishes for the newlyweds. Wedding gifts are typically not brought to ceremonies or receptions, and any that are will not be opened, but rather placed aside for later delivery to the newlyweds’ home. Nowadays, a couple often registers for gifts at a favorite store well in advance of their wedding, allowing them to create a list of household items, usually including china, silverware, linens or other fabrics, small appliances and similar gifts. Registries are also meant to help guests select gifts for the newlyweds.
No Peeking The superstitious belief that it’s bad luck for the groom to see his bride before the wedding can be traced back to the The Big Day
Besides the bride and groom, the wedding party in a traditional U.S. wedding includes: • The Best Man—usually the best or closest male friend or a relative of the groom is given this place of honor. • Maid of honor —usually the best or closest female friend of the bride is given this place of honor. If married, she is called a “matron of honor.” • Groomsmen—one or more males who support the groom. • Bridesmaids—one or more females who support the bride. • Flower girl—a young girl who will scatter flowers in front of the bridal party. • Ringbearer—usually a young boy, who carries the wedding rings. • Ushers—usually males, who help with the seating and organization. • Junior Bridesmaids—a young girl (usually between 8 and 18 years old) who the bride wants to be in the ceremony, but is too old to be a flower girl. When guests arrive, they are greeted by ushers who will seat them. Usually the family and friends of the bride will sit on one side of the church and the family and friends of the groom on the other. The bride and her entourage will arrive at the church in elegant cars, limos, or even sometimes horsedrawn carriages hired for the ceremony. The bridal entourage typically consists of the bride and her father, all the various bridesmaids, the maids of honor and the flower girls and page boys that are to attend her. The typical processional order goes like this: • The ushers and/or groomsmen first escort the grandparents of the bride and groom and seat them. • The ushers and/or groomsmen then escort the mother of groom and the mother of the bride and seat them. • Next, the bridesmaids enter, being escorted by the groomsmen. (continued on page S15)
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S5
POINT OF VIEW
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
LOVE IS WORTH IT! By Seneca Moraleda-Puguan
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room: A s S e n e c a walked down the aisle, tears rolled down my face. I couldn't believe that the woman I've prayed for and pursued with all my heart and strength is marrying me. On the 12th of February, 2014, the one who captured my heart even before I saw her face became my wife. The day she bore my name was one of the happiest days in my life. With all our family and friends there, the weather so fine, the beach so serene and the sunset so beautiful...it was such a perfect day! However, what led to that perfect day was everything but perfect. Our six months of preparation and planning tested the strength of our relationship. It was a season of sleepless nights, tear-jerking moments and prayer-filled days. I knew that it was the right time to marry her but I didn't know where to get all the money from. I was able to save some money I got from a scholarship grant but not enough to cover all the expenses. And I was just, and still am, a PhD scholar and she was then a student at a missions school preparing to become a missionary. And what made things more challenging was I was staying in Korea and she was in the Philippines. Skype and Facebook became our best friends. But I had faith that God would provide. It was hard for me to see my bride doing all the groundwork. It would have been much better if I was with her when she tried on her gown and went shopping in Divisoria for all the decorations in the venue, but I couldn’t. As hard as it was, I continued to encourage and help her the best I could in organizing the details of the wedding. It was tough but I had my eyes set on the day when she would become mine. I endured the homesickness, the doubts of not having enough, and late night Skype dates even after a long day in the lab.
The wedding planning was difficult but what I’ve braved just to have her was tougher. Winning her heart was not easy. I endured one rejection after another. Despite what she had put me through, I didn’t give up because I saw her value. She is a precious gem worth having and a princess like no other. She was no supermodel but her simplicity, perfect smile and beautiful heart let her shine brightly. I knew that the reward far outweighed the hardships I had to overcome. True enough, every time I look at her, my heart would say “it was worth it!...She is worth it!.’ Waking up at the sight of her and retiring at night with her in my arms for four months now and for the rest of my life is truly a glorious reward! Indeed, love is worth fighting for! Bride: As I marched down the aisle on the sandy beach of Laiya, Batangas wearing a simple beach dress and holding a bouquet of blue and green flowers with the song “Turning Pages” playing in the background, I could hear my heart beat and feel the gentle breeze touch my skin. It was so surreal…it seemed like I was floating. From afar, I saw my teary-eyed father and my anxious but smiling mother. My family and close friends were expectantly waiting for me. Some of them were smiling while some were in tears. But my eyes brightened and tears
fell when I saw my teary-eyed groom eagerly waiting for me at the end of the aisle. Finally, the day every girl dreams had arrived. After waiting patiently for 28 years, I was about to marry John Marc, the man I love. But the man I exchanged vows with was someone I never imagined I would spend forever with. I didn’t like him, not even had a crush on him. He wasn’t my type and I thought he would never be. I’ve always wanted someone who looked like an actor or a model and JM was very simple and geeky. I gave him three firm “NOs” during our courtship. Amazingly, after more than three years of persistent pursuit, he captured my entire heart. His godly character and pure heart won me over. He made me realize what really mattered—the heart. After two years of being in a long-distance relationship, on the 12th of August, 2013, he boldly proposed and I wholeheartedly said “yes.” I was excited but anxious at the same time because I’d be the one to take care of all the planning since he was away. In preparing for my own wedding, I wanted it to be perfect but I wasn’t an organized person. With the help of amazing and generous friends, we survived. We first decided what to prioritize which included venue and food; and photography and videography. We invested much in these and allotted little on minor details. Unlike other brides, I chose a simple
beach dress made in Divisoria and we picked out cheap but lasting rings made of titanium carbide. We didn't even hire wedding coordinators but instead took advantage of our gifted friends. What carried me through the tough and stressful season of planning was the encouragement of girlfriends, especially the married ones. They shared their notes and precious experiences with me, and they prayed for me. The prayers of friends and family were truly effective. We made it through! Our wedding was our first project together as a couple. We had a lot of arguments and misunderstandings because of differences in preferences. Most of the times, they were very simple like the texture and color of the sand in the wedding venue or the design of my wedding dress. But at the end of the day, we reminded ourselves what marriage is all about and how valuable we are to each other. We may have different opinions but we chose to compromise and put the other person above oneself. In the end, he got the sand color he wanted and I got the wedding dress design I liked. We always prayed over every detail of the wedding and encouraged each other every time we met on
Skype. It was one of the toughest but most exciting seasons in our lives. And the wedding day came, it was not perfect but it was everything we wanted. There were so many glitches, some of what we planned didn’t transpire but they didn’t matter. What mattered was we said “I do” before a minister and it was witnessed by our closest family and friends. And most importantly, the Author of our love story graced the event with His presence. It was glorious! Truly, love is worth waiting for. Husband and Wife: We have now been happily married for four months. We are still in our honeymoon stage and still learning about marriage. All we know is that it’s more than just a union between two people. It is a reflection of a greater love—the love of the Father for His children, the love of the Bridegroom for His bride. Understanding that He showed His love by laying down his life for us, we are learning each day to lay down our lives for each other as husband and wife. Our love story reminds us how faithful our Father is. He is really good. Just as He made our love story worth telling, He will make yours too. Because you see, love is worth it!
S6 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT
CAREER PROFILE
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Here Comes the Wedding Planner: Consider a Career as a Professional in the Bridal Business By Edna Bautista, Ed.D., C.W.S.
“T
he Wedding Planner,” the 2001 movie starring Jennifer Lopez, undoubtedly popularized the profession, glamorizing it as a real, viable career option. Traditionally, it has been the bride’s family, specifically her mother, who planned the wedding. Royal and rich families hired extra help in organizing the big social event, and the role of the wedding planner was only associated with the wealthy. Couples considering a destination wedding to Hawaii and elsewhere must rely on a local expert to handle arrangements of their special day abroad. Now, a wedding planner* is no longer a luxury but regarded as a necessity, especially for busy brides and grooms. “Most [couples] don't realize how much they need a wedding planner until their wedding day. And by then it's too late,” said Keri Shepherd, author of “Hawaii Weddings Made Simple” and co-owner of The Wedding Planners (http://www.wedding-planners.net/). “A good wedding planner can help you save money on a wedding by reviewing contracts, letting you know what areas you can save money and suggest the best vendors based on your budget. If you're willing to spend tens of thousands of dollars on your wedding, a wedding planner is a small investment in ensuring your day will run smoothly without the bride, groom or family members stressing out and trying to coordinate it themselves.” Despite the economy, the occupational outlook is positive for those who are considering a career as a professional wedding planner, especially since Hawaii accounts for more than 20,000 destination wed-
dings annually by U.S. couples, according to a Maui’d Forever study (data from Japan and other countries are excluded). The Bureau of Labor Statistics also indicates a steady growth for this profession. With so many people getting married, there will always be a need for someone to plan their wedding.
What Wedding Planners Do Wedding planners work on behalf of the couple to make their wedding ideas a reality. The bride and groom chooses how much—or how little— they would like to be involved in the entire process, leaving the wedding planner to take care of the rest of the responsibilities. These duties include but are not limited to: • Setting up a budget and timetable • Designing and carrying out the theme, color schemes and style • Suggesting ideas for favors, decorations, traditions and trends • Visiting/booking venues within the budget and size of the event • Assembling and working with a team of vendors (florists, photographers, videographers, caterers, DJs, transportation, etc.) • Reviewing and negotiating contracts • Assisting with invitation wording, ordering and mailing • Managing the guest list, RSVPs, seating charts and accommodations for outof-towners • Acting as the couple’s confidante when there are conflicts with families, friends and vendors • Helping with fashion choices for the wedding entourage • Reminding the couple of appointments (fittings, tastings, etc.) and deadlines • Planning bridal showers,
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bachelor/bachelorette parties, rehearsal dinners and other nuptial-related gettogethers Directing the rehearsal Overseeing the decorations and set-up at the ceremony and reception Coordinating the day-of events according to the timeline Dealing with wedding crashers and disorderly guests Collecting payments for vendors Ensuring that no damage is done to the venues after the wedding Delivering the couple’s gifts to a designated residence Arranging the honeymoon plans Solving problems to minimize the couple’s stress Following up on photo albums and videos, thankyou notes, gown dry-cleaning/preservation, etc. Keeping the couple updatedthroughout the entire planning process
For additional information and specific breakdown of duties, read the following articles online. • “What Do Wedding Planners Do?” by Nina Calla w a y (http://weddings.about.co m/od/gettingstarted/a/weddingplanners.htm) • “What Does a Wedding Planner Do?” by Debbie Quain (http://weddingsforaliving.com/what-doesa-wedding-planner-do)
Breaking Into the Business Many wedding planners get their start in affiliated fields, like catering, public relations event management, floral and crafts, photography/videography, party rentals and retail. The exposure to the bridal industry through these fields gives them the advantage of knowing how wed-
ding vendors operate and interconnect. Mona Hirata of Neu Events (http://www.neuevents.com), formerly of Weddings by Grace and Mona, got her start spearheading the catering department of a Waikiki boutique hotel before transitioning to a job as a wedding planner. She said, “Working in a hotel catering department was where I gained much of my initial hands-on, professional experience with weddings. Collaborating with the executive chef on menu planning for clients, marketing the hotel at bridal expos and with the hotel’s public relations agency, working with couples and vendors in preparation for weddings at the hotel and executing the weddings on-site served as the foundation of my know-how with weddings. My work at the hotel provided me with an understanding of the venue’s very significant role in weddings, a solid introduction into the wedding industry and the very valuable experience of carefully tending to couples’ needs for their very special day.” Tammy Ash Perkins of A First Class Weddings (http://afirstclasswedding.com) and author of “The Best of Hawaii Wedding Book: A Guide to Maui, Lanai and Kauai—Top Locations, Services and Resources for Your Destination Wedding,” recalled, “I did video production in Maui and was able to meet and work with others in the wedding business. But I was disheartened by the services that were being offered to couples at the time. I knew something much better could be
available to them so I started my own wedding planning company.”
Certification Adds Credibility While experience and skills are important qualities of a wedding planner, certification does add credibility to his/her resume because it shows that he/she had formal training in topics, such as business practices, contracts, marketing, budgeting, time management, vendor relations, etiquette and wedding traditions and trends. Tuition varies, depending on the certifying and accrediting organization. In 2009, Kapiolani Community College (KCC) was the first in Hawaii to offer a wedding planning certification program on campus through Lovegevity’s Wedding Planning Institute (http://www.weddingplanninginstitute.com). Hirata, who has an MBA, served as one the faculty members. Although the course is no longer available at KCC, Maui College currently has an online wedding planning certification program as part of its continuing education division, E d V e n t u r e (http://maui.hawaii.edu/edventure/). Besides on-campus seminars and online learning, selfpaced home-study courses are another option to earning certification as a wedding planner. There are several certifying organizations, but the two established and most popular ones are the Association of Bridal Consultants (ABC) and Weddings Beautiful Worldwide (WBW). (continued on page S14)
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S7
BRIDAL SHOWERS
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Bridal Showers and Other Wedding Festivities By Honey Jarque Loop
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bridal shower is a practical and attractive way to help a bride set up housekeeping. Guests can give utilitarian things such as kitchen supplies, linens, cooking equipment and bath accessories to form a little nest egg of needed items with which to start off her new life. It is typically an informal affair and the objective is to socialize, enjoy refreshments and watch the bride open gifts. Often there are activities or games. These fun parties can be "ladies only" or co-ed events. Bridesmaids might cohost, or a group of close friends or even work colleagues might take on the responsibility. Although it is lovely to send a printed invitation to a
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wedding shower, if it is a very small or very casual party, it is acceptable to invite guests by phone or even email. From an etiquette standpoint, there are really only a few things to remember about a shower. The bride is usually consulted before the shower about what she really needs so that the gifts are appropriate. ● The host must provide refreshments. ● The bride must open all her gifts at the party. ● Registry information shall not be put out on the shower invitation. If it's a themed shower, say bath, kitchen, linen or lingerie, it is okay to note color preference or sizes; if the host wishes, she can include a separate note with the invitation specifying the bridal registry.
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Everyone who is invited to the shower must be invited to the wedding. A thank-you note is required , even if thanks were expressed personally to the shower giver during the party, as well as for gifts from people who didn't attend the shower. If bride is to receive things to wear, exact sizes should be ascertained.
Celebration Do's and Don'ts Do ● Even though you are busy with work and planning a wedding, take the time to enjoy these special parties with your close friends and families as these are the moments you will treasure. ● Express your wishes regarding the size of each of your parties, special people you would like to include and any important
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details about things you really want, but do so politely and with consideration. Be a considerate honoree. Remember to thank the host of any and every special event with a personal note and a small gift of thanks.
Don't Do not take over the planning of your celebration. Let yourself be surprised and delighted by what your loved ones come up with for you. ● Don't make demands. If you have a request or an important priority, just let the hosts know politely and discreetly. ●
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Don't invite people yourself. If there is someone you want to include, ask the hostess if it is possible and provide contact information.
Pre-wedding parties and showers can be gay and exciting, and certainly express the joy and happiness surrounding the upcoming event. However, if there are too many parties preceding the wedding, or parties are closely scheduled, it can be exhausting to everyone concerned. If many people suggest parties, the wise bride may urge them to join forces. A sensible program of entertaining can make this time m e m o r a b l e f o r a l l . (www.philstar.com)
S8 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT
BUSINESS PROFILE
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Casablanca Bridal & Formals: Reaching the Pinnacle of Success By Chona Montesines-Sonido
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s a little girl growing up in the Philippines, Gladys Agsalud, would often dream of the perfect wedding. At age 9, she was designing wedding garments for her dolls. Little did she know that wedding gowns would be her life’s calling. Agsalud is the owner of Casablanca Bridal and Formals, Hawaii’s premiere wedding salon. Located in Moiliili, Casablanca Bridal and Formals offers hundreds of formal and informal wedding gowns that reflect the latest in bridal fashion trends. Prices range from $300 to well over $6,000. For Agsalud, success started with humble beginnings. She comes from a family of six who were raised by their grandmother Albina Lozares. She traces her business savvy to her grandmother whom she describes as a very good small business owner and inspired Agsalud to pursue her dreams. She attended the University of Hawaii-Manoa, where she majored in psychology. To gain more insight into the business world, she decided to pursue an MBA. True to her
entrepreneurial spirit, Agsalud was not only studying but also running her own t-shirt business from her college dorm room. It was during this time that she began formulating a plan to open a bridal shop. After college, Agsalud set out to pursue her dreams. After numerous attempts to secure a bank loan, she decided to use the equity in her condominium for a small loan from Hawaii National Bank. In 1992, she opened Casablanca Bridal and Florals, which initially catered to Japanese couples and offered high-end wedding gowns from Christian Dior, Helen Morley and other designers. Business boomed during the 1990s as Japanese brides typically spent up to $70,000 on weddings and $3,000 for a designer gown. The Japanese market began to decline in the
early 2000s, forcing Agsalud to close shop and relocate to Mapunapuna. To offset the loss from Japanese couples, she expanded her customer base by catering to a wider market and more budget-conscious brides. Her gowns ranged in price $200 to as high as $4,000. But no matter the wedding gown’s price tag, Agsalud provided the same personalized service and attention to detail for each client. It was this unparalleled customer service that allowed her to build a strong base of local and loyal customers. In 2007, she moved yet again, this time to South Beretania Street where she bought a 5,000 square foot corner property and converted it into a chic, three-story bridal salon. The shop offers clients a luxurious feel with crystal chandeliers, an elegant spiral staircase and cathedral-style windows. The second and third floors feature residential quarters, a full-size kitchen, master bathroom and a rooftop with gorgeous city views that are perfect for wedding photography.
nearly $1 million sales annually. Agsalud is the exclusive representative for Pronovias, a Spanish bridal-wear manufacturer and the largest in the world. This past May, she was awarded the “Platinum Dealer” and “Outstanding Dealer” by Pronovias during its 50th anniversary in Barcelona, Spain. She also offers gowns from European designers like St. Patrick and La Sposa, and carries American designs by Monique LHuillier—a celebrity designer who uses a lot of rosettes in her creations. In addition, Agsalud has her own fashion line featuring dresses under the label Alba, which was named in tribute to her late grandmother. With Hawaii’s picture perfect weather, Agsalud’s busiest months of the year are usually March through August. She advises brides-to-be to start shopping for their gown early—at least nine months in advance. Some gowns take up to three months to arrive after ordering, while custom-made gowns could take as long as eight months. Agsalud says that each wedding gown is as unique as the bride herself and is limited only by her imagination. But ultimately, the gown is less important than the emotions and romance associated with the big day. “If a bride feels beautiful, she’ll be beautiful no matter what she wears,” Agsalud says.
Premiere Wedding Salon There’s no denying that Hawaii is an ideal location for brides and grooms to say their “I Do’s.” In fact, Hawaii’s wedding rate is second in the nation with 20,000 weddings each year—not just by local couples but also visitors. Casablanca Bridal and Florals is a key player in the local wedding scene, thanks to Agsalud’s commitment to customer service and business in- Family First tegrity. Her business generates For Agsalud, her family
inspires her to give her absolute best each day and for each client. “They’re my priority and my work revolves around them,” she says. “I feel blessed and grateful to be able to have a job I love and be a hands-on mom at the same time.” Agsalud brought her son Matthew to work with her when he was small. In fact, all of her business moves were related to her son’s educational and extracurricular needs. She wanted a “stay-at-home” feel at her bridal salon, so she created a little office for him equipped with books, computer and desk. Matthew is now a college sophomore studying on the mainland. In addition to her running her business, Agsalud is an active volunteer with Honolulu Community College, the Filipino Chamber of Commerce and the Oahu Filipino Community Council. She often donates dresses and her personal resources to local charity groups. Agsalud also takes time to mentor UH students. She advises aspiring entrepreneurs to be passionate about their work, be willing to start small and build their business forward, remain focused and expect to put in many long hours. “Be positive and keep your values at heart,” she says. “When difficulties arise, know that there's always a workable solution to every problem. Always use your smarts and give it the best you’ve got,” she says.
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S9
MARRIAGE INSIGHTS
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
TImElESS ADvIcE For mAkINg mArrIAgES lAST By Edna Bautista, Ed.D., C.W.S.
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wedding is just for a day; a marriage is for a lifetime! With this declaration in mind, the Hawaii Filipino Chronicle asked couples who have been married 20 years or longer to share their advice for making their marriages last. Congratu-
lations! “Marriage is not a 50/50 arrangement. It's got to be 100/100! But neither one can ever appear to know, or think, that they are doing more. And if you really love each other enough or eventually come to love each other that much, you don't even notice how easy it is." FlORA and JOhn SIgnOR, Iroquois Pt. Wed March 1, 1951 (63 years)
“Have a date night at least once a month, whether it’s going to the movies or trying a new restaurant.”
MARY Ann and RAul bAYbAYAn, Ewa beach Wed on June 14, 1992 (22 years)
“Try to understand how your partner feels and how not to push the ‘negative buttons’.”
nORA and KEn KAMAI, honolulu Wed on Dec. 1, 1989 (25 years)
"Do as I say or else I'll get the remote and put you on happy mode."
nEnA and STAn FInCh, Salt lake Wed on July 2, 1991 (23 years)
“Never fail at loving each other. Be patient, be kind. Have faith, have hope and have fun.”
ElISA and DOMIngO bAuTISTA, Ewa beach Wed on Oct. 9, 1965 (48 years)
"The key is to respect each other and listen to “We live life, joke around and enjoy each each other regardless.” other's company. We are soul mates." RAChEl and ARIEl MARAMbA, lEOlAnI and PITOnE lEAO, Salt lake Kapolei Wed on April 15, 1992 (22 years) Wed on Jan. 18, 1984 (30 years)
“Faith in God, commitment to each other and “Commitment, love and family above all else. open communication are the factors that make our And yes, GOLF helps!" marriage work.”
MYRnA and TJ JuRADO, Mililani Wed on Dec. 22, 1979 (34 years)
MARIA and ChARlES bOhE Waianae Wed Dec. 8, 1981 (32 years)
S10 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT
BRIDAL GOWNS
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Pronovias Wedding Dresses
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riginating from Barcelona in Spain, Pronovias brings a European sense of timeless elegance and affordable luxury to brides the world over. Crafting bridal gowns from the finest fabrics and down to the most minute and lovely detail, Pronovias designers create bridal gowns in a wide range of styles and silhouettes, from formal to informal, to please even the most discerning fashionista bride. As the leading wedding dress company in the world, Pronovias’ gowns are known for a spectacular fit and style. Its elegance, however, begins in the most basic element of all wedding dresses—the fabric. Pronovias prides itself on offering gowns that stand out in sumptuous highquality fabrics such as shantung Mikado silk, royal satin, silk chiffon, chantilly lace and morbido tulle. Then there is attention to detail. For Pronovias, attention to detail is second-to-none. Current Pronovias wedding dress styles are characterized by exquisite hand-sewn white, silver and clear beading in intricate patterns, delicately crafted illusion overlays and beautifully precise pleating and draping. The gowns pictured here are from the 2015 Bridal Gowns Fashion collections from Pronovias. For brides-tobe, Casablanca Bridal and Formals—the main local distributor for Pronovias bridal gowns—would be an ideal place to begin selecting the wedding gown of their dreams.
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S11
WEDDING PULSE
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
What were some exciting moments of your wedding day? What were the biggest challenges of your marriage preparation? By HFC Staff rhoDeriCk anD rom esTraDa The most exciting part in preparation of my wedding was having my husband help me throughout the whole process. We both were very involved in making all the decisions. It was fun choosing the linens, cake, lighting, flowers and music together. It was also nice having both of our families meet for the first time. The most stressful parts in the preparation were the small details and having a destination wedding. It was hard trying to fly back and forth to make sure everything was going okay. On our big day, everything turned out amazing! I loved our wedding and wouldn’t change anything.
James & sonia LuTian makizuru James: Checking all that you need before the magic date like the venue, food and the wedding entourage. Also making sure that everything was ready, meeting new members of the family on both sides and having to “check and balance” everything. Sonia: Selecting the members of the wedding entourage, making sure to accommodate our closest friends and relatives, choosing the wedding gown and the motif color, picking up the godparents and most of all, making sure that both sides were satisfied with and their expectations met as new family interactions began.
kurT & mary rose nino Kurt Nino: This may sound cliche, but the most exciting moment of our wedding day was when I saw my wife in her beautiful wedding dress walking down the aisle. I still have vivid recollections of seeing her bright smile and at that moment I knew my dreams had finally come true...I was marrying the love of my life. Mary Rose: My biggest challenge was planning a wedding while in medical school studying to become a doctor. I would have to go to meetings with our vendors after school and use my study breaks to make things such as our invitations, favors, and decorations. It required a lot of time management, but seeing how beautifully everything came together on our wedding day made all the stress worth it .
ranDy & karen orDonio Randy: For most people, the most exciting part is starting a family. But for us, we were blessed to have two beautiful children before we got married and the opportunity for us to grow and add more children as a married couple is a very important and exciting chapter in our lives. Karen: The biggest challenge in preparing for our marriage was determining a budget that would fulfill a wedding ceremony and reception of my dreams. We envisioned a wedding that we could share with our closest family and friends at an affordable price. With the help of wedding expos and researching bridal magazines, we were able to reserve vendors at a reasonable price that fit our budget and made it a day we’ll never forget.
Chris & Jeribie Tanouye Chris: For me, it was the anticipation that I was going to marry the woman who I love. Jeribie: Marriage preparation was more than just planning the wedding itself. It required us to mentally prepare for this next endeavor that we were about to take together. We sat down and really communicated to one another about what we ultimately wanted in our marriage and how we were going to grow together. We prepared spiritually by making sure we were one in our faith and beliefs. Once we achieved this, we were able to take the next step to ensure that we would be married in a Catholic church. Lastly, we had to meet the physicality of marriage preparation. We dedicated many hours to ensuring that my dream wedding came to fruition. If it wasn’t for the support of my husband and he physically being there for me during the decision making process and all other aspects and issues that we encountered while planning the wedding, I would have been burnt out and overcome with disappointment. But I had his 100 percent physical support throughout the planning process, which I am so blessed and thankful for. Marriage preparation requires that two couples be committed to the process and to each other. My husband and I not only love one another, but we support each other. This is what makes the challenges of marriage preparation an easier task to tackle together.
DwighT & gJ yorke Dwight: The most exciting part about planning a wedding is planning it with your wife. And also having family and friends gather together to celebrate your love for each other. GJ: The difficulties with planning the wedding included trying to make everyone happy (your husband, family, in-laws and yourself) with the whole event. And of course, having the wedding of your dreams on a budget takes a lot of planning, prioritizing, patience and pizzazz.
S12 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT
WEDDING GUIDE
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Before AND After the Wedding:
Marriage Preparation Helps Couples Vow to Be Together “For Better and For Ever” By Edna Bautista, Ed.D., C.W.S.
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ouples spend several months planning for the day of their wedding. But what about preparing for a lifetime of marriage? As the national divorce rate still averages between 4050 percent, according to the National Center for Health Statistics, Father Robert A. Ruhnke, C.SS.R., D.Min., has made it his mission and ministry to help couples vow to be together “For Better and For Ever”. “Preparing for marriage should be part of the wedding planning process,” he said. “Love helps, but it’s not always enough.” Determined to save marriages before they start, Father Ruhnke wrote “For Better and For Ever”, a workbook he developed while working in marriage preparation programs during the 1970s. First published in 1981, the workbook is now being used in several churches (both Catholic and Protestant) in Hawaii and throughout the United States, Canada, Latin America and Guam as part of marriage preparation and formation programs. Although the workbook is not yet available in Pilipino, the Catholic edition is available in English, Spanish, French and Vietnamese (the Protestant edition has an English and Spanish version only and a Covenant edition in English is also available for secular couples). The workbook is suitable for interfaith and intercultural couples. The Texas-based priest, who has traveled internationally to train those working in marriage programs, said “For Better and For Ever” is an important workbook because “it is one of the most comprehensive resources that thoroughly covers several aspects of marriage topics. It enables the couple to take a proactive role in
their own marriage in the early and formative stages by studying the topics, doing the homework, talking with each other and finding what works for them,” explained Father Ruhnke. This is good practice in taking time out for each other and communicating, which can become a great habit in their marriage. The workbooks are often used with help from a marriage sponsor couple who is trained to guide the engaged couple during the wedding planning process. [Note that their roles are not the same as ninongs/ninangs (godparents) or primary and secondary sponsors in a Filipino wedding entourage.] “The word ‘guide’ instead of ‘mentor’ is a more appropriate term for the role of the ‘sponsor couple’. ‘Mentor’ implies that the sponsors are experts and that their marriage is better than the engaged couple’s relationship. All marriages are different…marriage is a work in progress,” said Father Ruhnke. Sponsor couples invite and meet engaged couples in the privacy of their own homes for at least five sessions to discuss the marriage topics in the workbook. This couple-tocouple session is confidential and more intimate and personalized than the larger lecturestyle Engaged Encounter, Pre-Cana or other group retreat workshops. “Many couples are required by their parishes to attend Engaged Encounter or Pre-Cana. They go through the retreats to satisfy the requirements to get married in the church. And then after the wedding, there is no other obligation. A follow-up is necessary,” noted Father Ruhnke. With “For Better and For Ever,” couples take the initiative to continue doing selfchecks on their marriage, as there are three- and six-month
Dr. Edna Bautista (center) directing the rehearsals of the couples they sponsored to be married at their church
MARRIAGE PREPARATION / “FOR BETTER AND FOR EVER” TOPICS • Wedding ceremony logistics • Family of origin, traditions • Decisions of conscience, morality • Commitment, sacrament of marriage • Cohabitation, pre-marital sex • Remarriage, blended families • Intimacy, sexuality, family planning, parenthood • Finances, money • Careers • Communication, problem solving, forgiveness • Spirituality, mixed religion, prayer, church community follow-up study questions in the chapters. Sponsor couples are also encouraged to touch base with the couple after the wedding. “Following up with the newlyweds is an important component of the ‘For Better and For Ever’ program and marriage formation. As a community, we must help others succeed in their marriages,” he emphasized. Engaged couples can use the “For Better and For Ever” workbook on their own without meeting with marriage sponsors, attending retreats or even belonging to a church. “Couples have that choice of going through the workbook themselves and not feel they have to be required to prepare for their marriage,” said Father Ruhnke. “For Better and For Ever” is designed to help engaged couples take responsibility for learning the skills that will help them establish and sustain a healthy and successful marriage. “They are accountable to each other. They
are the ones in charge of their marriage and future,” he said. Our Lady of Perpetual Help Church (OLPH) in Ewa Beach is one of the first few churches in Hawaii to adopt Father Ruhnke’s book for use in their local marriage preparation program. “We started using Father Rob’s book when my wife Eunice and I were a sponsor couple at another parish’s marriage preparation program a long time ago, before I was even ordained a deacon. We liked how thorough it was in addressing various marriage topics so we continued to use it at our parish,” said Ron Paglinawan of OLPH. Before setting their wedding date, engaged couples should plan to devote at least six months to complete preparations set forth by the Catholic Diocese of Honolulu (attendance to Engaged Encounter retreats) and their local church at which their ceremony will take place. “Each clergy may have a
slightly different approach in their marriage preparation program. Some do more, some less. But the goal is the same— to provide the couple with necessary tools and techniques so they can maintain a healthy and vibrant relationship in their marriage,” said Deacon Paglinawan. At OLPH (and some other churches), engaged couples take a pre-marriage inventory called “Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding and Study” (FOCCUS). The results provide a snapshot of where the couple’s relationship stands based on their views about various marriage topics. This gives both the engaged and sponsor couples discussion points and areas they can focus on when going through the “For Better and For Ever” workbook. Like Father Ruhnke, Deacon Paglinawan believes that sponsor couples are an integral part of the marriage preparation program because they are like a support group. Not only do they help busy priests and pastors with the marriage preparation process, but also sponsor couples “have gone through many of the marriage issues themselves and can share with the engaged couples their experiences,” said Deacon Paglinawan. “When they meet together at the sponsor couple’s homes to discuss the chosen chapters in ‘For Better and For Ever’, especially when there are children around, the engaged couple can see the reality of marriage and family life,” he added. “They can also see that their sponsors are in love, sensitive to each other’s needs and committed to their marriages.” Sponsor couples can build lasting friendships with their engaged couples as well. Deacon Paglinawan said they are instrumental in helping the engaged couple in their spiritual journey by encouraging them to go to church and strengthen (continued on page S14)
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S13
WEDDING HIGHLIGHT
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
THE PERFECT HONEYMOON
By Seneca Moraleda-Puguan
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surprise dinner on a raft in the middle of the sea while being serenaded with our favorite love songs. I will never forget what my husband did for me after our wedding day. It was four days and three nights of marital bliss. We were brought to an island in Palawan and left alone for half a day and were given a massage in the afternoon. We also went kayaking, snorkeling, island hopping and sunbathing. It was a time of being together and enjoying each other. After months of stressful preparation and the hustle and bustle of the wedding day, we had each other all to ourselves. Finally, we were on our honeymoon. But what is a honeymoon and how did it originate? The term “honeymoon” dates back to the 5th century AD, when the calendar was represented by cycles of the moon in many cultures. It was a common practice for newlywed couples to drink plenty of mead during their first month of married
Sunbathing and strolling along the beach
life. Mead, a honey-based alcohol, is believed to have aphrodisiac properties. Samuel Johnson, an English writer, wrote in 1542: “The first month after marriage, when there is nothing but tenderness and pleasure; originally having no reference to the period of a month, but comparing mutual affection of newly-married persons to the changing moon which is no sooner full that it begins to wane; now, usually, the holiday spent together by a newly married couple, before settling down at home.” This was one of the earliest descriptions of honeymoon. Today, couples go on a honeymoon to be alone but it wasn’t always this way. In the early 1800s, it was a custom for members of India’s upper class to take a “bridal tour”
Snorkeling in a Philippine island
where the pair traveled to visit family and friends who were unable to attend the wedding. This custom was borrowed by the British and it spread across Europe and France in the early 19th century. A honeymoon, as we all know it today, is a time for newly married couples to have physical intimacy, a time to plan and talk about having children and get to know each other intimately; a time to know more of each other’s family roots. It is also a time to relax and enjoy doing things together. What are some things you can do on your honeymoon? Depending on the season of your wedding, you can explore an exotic destination or one of your favorite places. Do things you’ve never done before as a couple. Go on an
Drinking a glass of wine together on a boat ride
adventure together. Go skydiving in New Zealand, skiing in Switzerland or bungee jumping in the Himalayas. Try snorkeling in the Philippine islands, kayaking in Hawaii or scuba diving in the Maldives. Visit romantic destinations like Paris or Vienna. Indulge in relaxing activities like sitting together in a Jacuzzi or having a massage on a gondola in Venice. Or simply stroll along a pristine white sand beach, watch a sunrise or sunset together, enjoy a candlelight dinner, laze around and sleep together on a hammock or rock each other’s world inside your room. It really doesn’t matter what you choose to do as long as you’re having fun together. You don’t even have to spend much to have an amazing hon-
eymoon. The presence of each other and the love you share is what makes it perfect. The honeymoon season may have some of life’s sweetest memories but it doesn’t have to end after the first few days or months of married life. As husband and wife, you have to work out your marriage to make each day a honeymoon. To find out more about beautiful honeymoon escapades and packages, visit the Hawaii World Class Wedding Expo on October 3 to 4, 2014 at the Hawaii Convention Center sponsored by the Hawaii Weddings & Honeymoon Escapes Magazine. You can also go online to: w w w. h a w a i i w e d d i n g s magazine.com or www.facebook.com/hawaiiworldclassw eddingexpo.
the couple will kneel while pouring the tea. The tea set itself is usually kept as a keepsake of the wedding and sometimes is passed down as a family heirloom.
lationship is and must be treated with special care.
OTHER WEDDING TRADITIONS
Wedding Traditions from Around the World By Deborah T. Manog
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ne of the most iconic scenes of a traditional Filipino wedding would be that moment when everyone whips out their dollar bills and rushes towards the bride and groom during their first dance of the night. Guests of all ages line up to take turns inserting a rolled up bill into the bride’s mouth and the groom must retrieve it using only his lips, or vice versa. Other modifications include pinning the money directly to the newlyweds’ garments as they dance. The idea behind the money dance, or sayaw ng pera,” is for the guests to contribute to the wealth and prosperity of the
newly married couple as they begin their new life together. This traditional dance is not strictly Filipino but is also practiced in the Hispanic and Polish cultures. There are many other cultural wedding traditions around the world as well. Nowadays, it is popular to have a modern, westernized wedding, but keeping true to a couple’s cultural traditions celebrates both families’ origins and faith. Many people opt to incorporate old-age traditions that celebrate their history and honors their roots.
Jumping the Broom After the couple is pronounced “man and wife” they hold hands and while facing their guests, jump over a broomstick together. This cus-
tom is rooted in Africa and the sticks are supposed to symbolize a new home together. However, this ritual took on deeper meaning during the days of slavery in the United States when African-American couples were not allowed to marry. However, they used this “jumping of the broom” to publicly symbolize their love and commitment towards each other.
Tea Ceremony The tea ceremony is considered the most sacred ritual of Chinese nuptials. The act of serving tea shows deep respect and honors both the bride and groom’s families. The order of who is served tea is critical as well, starting with the parents and then proceeding from the eldest to youngest. Traditionally,
Breaking Glass The shattering of glass is mandatory at Jewish weddings. Traditionally, the groom will break a glass, wrapped up in thin cloth, with his foot. Everyone cheers and shouts “Mazel Tov,” which is Yiddish for “good fortune.” There are several interpretations of this tradition. Some believe it is the hope that the couple’s happiness together will be as plentiful as the many shards of broken glass. Others believe that it is a reminder of their faith, tying back to the destruction of temples in Jerusalem. It is also thought to be symbolic of how fragile a re-
Mehndi Mehndi, or henna, is one of the major celebrations leading up to an Indian wedding. During a lively party of food, music and dance, mehndi is carefully applied to the bride’s hands and feet. The bride’s pattern is usually very elaborate and time-consuming. The female members of the family can also choose to have mehndi applied on their bodies but the pattern won’t be as intricate. It is believed that the darker the color that the mehndi leaves on the bride, the more she will be loved by her husband and her in-laws. Mehndi also is believed to have medicinal properties and is believed to take some of the wedding-planning stress away from the bride.
S14 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014 HERE COMES... (from page S6)
ABC (www.bridalassn.com), the oldest and largest organization exclusively serving wedding professionals, has been training wedding coordinators since 1955. WBW (http://www.weddingsbeautiful.com), established in 1968, is a division of the National Bridal Service and offers certifications for wedding specialists and planners. In 2000, WBW became a licensed program in the Philippines (http://www.weddingsbeautifulphilippines.net/). Bernalyn (Berlyn) Salvador-Yap, the current president of WBW-Philippines, received her Certified Wedding Specialist title in 2004.
Membership Has Its Benefits Membership to wedding associations, like certification, is not required, but there are benefits to belonging to professional groups. Wedding planners are able to interact with others like them and exchange ideas, network with vendors and prospective partners, get leads on clients through their business listing in the association’s website/directory and participate in workshops and seminars to learn more about trends and practices in the industry. Also, “members of associations generally abide by guidelines of conduct that the business(es) will follow, in addition to their own in-house business practices,” said Susan O’Donnell of Aloha Wedding Planners (www.alohaweddingplanners.com) who also serves
as a board member of the Oahu Wedding Association. “Hiring an event planner who works side by side with other businesses with likeminded goals can make your event run smoothly and keep the trouble-shooting to a minimum. Businesses within the Oahu Wedding Association work together to keep informed on industry standards, trends, state law/regulations/permitting so that we can maintain current industry standards,” she said. There are several groups to which wedding planners may belong, such as the Association of Bridal Consultants, the Association of Certified Professional Wedding Consultants, Association for Wedding Professionals International and American Association of Certified Wedding Planners, to name a few. In Hawaii, wedding professionals may join the Oahu Wedding Association, Maui Wedding Association and Kauai Wedding Professionals Association.
Money Matters The average wedding cost in the United States is $25,200, according to the Cost of Wedd i n g w e b s i t e (http://www.costofwedding.co m). In Hawaii, where the cost of living is higher than on the mainland, the average wedding expenditures are $38,246 (Honolulu County), $34,850 (Kauai County), $30, 917 (Hawaii/Big Island County)
MARRIAGE PREPARATION... (from page S12)
their faith, reflecting the belief that “the couple that prays together stays together”. Volunteers are welcome to serve in their church’s respective marriage preparation program as an optional ministry. Donating time as a sponsor couple is a meaningful wedding gift for the engaged couple. Being involved in the ministry also enriches the marriage of those who volunteer. Some couples are still in touch with their own sponsor couples long after the wedding and have now become sponsor couples themselves. “Married couples who want
to serve as sponsors should be open to sharing and establishing trust with their engaged couple,” said Deacon Paglinawan. “They should be devoted to volunteering their time to be effective in this ministry. They also go through training workshops.” (Father Ruhnke sometimes travels to Hawaii to train sponsor couples in the “For Better and For Ever” marriage preparation program.) After the wedding, and when the honeymoon is over, Deacon Paglinawan encourages couples to keep working on their marriage to make it better forever.
and $36,402 (Maui County). In a wedding budget, usually 10-15 percent is allocated for wedding planning services. In-demand and celebrity wedding planners command higher percentages. For exceptional service, some even receive extra tips. Most wedding planners also charge an hourly rate for consultations and meetings and a flat fee for packages ranging from “day-of coordination only” to “full–scale service”. Wedding planners can supplement their income by planning other events (anniversaries, birthdays, retirements, corporate functions, etc.), though most prefer to focus on weddings as their specialty only. They, like celebrity wedding planners Colin Cowie, David Tutera, Preston Bailey and Sasha Souza, can also earn more money through television appearances, book deals, speaking engagements and designer collections in their product lines.
Surviving and Thriving As A Wedding Planner The wedding industry is very competitive and one must work very hard to succeed as a wedding planner. “When I started out in 1993, there were only a handful of wedding planners. But now there are so many!” noted Perkins. She has witnessed some questionable practices from some vendors who are in the business just to make big bucks. To succeed as a wed“Couples get caught up with their jobs, children and homes that they need to reconnect with each other on a continuing basis,” he said. “Making time to go to Marriage Encounter or one of the marriage retreats presented by the Diocese’s faith formation program can keep their relationship healthy and satisfying.” Just as it takes ongoing work in a marriage, Father Ruhnke wants to keep improving “For Better and For Ever” also. He and his resource team—and Deacon Paglinawan at the local level—are available to answer questions
ding planner, she advised, “Stay out of the drama. There is a lot of it in this industry that you don’t see. There is favoritism and people trying to get rich off their clients but don’t really care about them. Focus on your job as a wedding planner, do it well, be the best human being you can be and help people live their dreams. If you love what you do as a wedding planner, like I do, it will shine through your work.” There is also a lot of pressure to plan the perfect wedding and event, and those who do it admit their job has many challenges. But professionals suggested some of their tips for this trade. “It seems like a glamorous job,” said O’Donnell. “However, this person must be detailed-oriented, organized, able to think fast and problem-solve at a moment's notice. Education can help…[but] on-the-job training is also important before considering starting your own business as a wedding planner. Having experience in handling and arranging food and beverage services is also necessary. Some of this is only learned by working in job-related positions before becoming a 'planner'.” Hirata added, “It is important that aspiring wedding planners also possess an entrepreneurial spirit, as one of the best ways to enjoy a career in wedding planning is to actually start one’s own business. In preparation for doing so, I recommend getting as much
experience and knowledge as possible, by becoming certified in wedding planning, interning with other planners or hotels/wedding venues and even planning events for friends and family. I also suggest meeting and networking with other vendors in the industry and keeping abreast of trends in the industry.” Despite stressful conditions, long hours and weekend workdays, wedding planners absolutely enjoy what they do and find their job very rewarding! “I love that wedding planning enables me to truly help and serve couples to the best of my ability,” said Hirata. “It involves creativity and style; it provides me with the opportunity to mentor interns and members of our team and to see them grow professionally; it allows me to be involved with a very special and joyous time in a couple’s life. I also value the fact that I can craft and define the direction of our company based on my values and belief-system; I get to enjoy seeing several months of planning and preparation come to fruition on the wedding day…but I suppose what I find most rewarding is seeing the couple truly enjoy themselves at their wedding, and hearing how much they enjoyed their special day. If they loved their wedding day—and the process of getting there, too—then I know that we have succeeded in what we set out to do.”
and receive constructive comments about the marriage preparation program. Father Ruhnke may be reached at
(210) 534-1129 or rob@marriagepreparation.com and Deacon Paglinawan may be reached at (808) 368-3250.
SUPPLEMENT HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE S15
BRIDAL BEAUTY TIPS
WEDDING & BRIDAL SUPPLEMENT 2014
Bridal Beauty 101 M
ANILA, Philippines - Many people call June the Marry Month. Indeed, brides are most likely now trying to perfect everything in their long to-do list. One important consideration when picking out hair and make-up looks is the time your nuptials will take place. Will you swap “I dos” the first thing in the morning or is your wedding an evening affair? Remember to match your look with the overall feel of the time of day. Gandang Ricky Reyes gives brides these helpful pointers to remember in creating a beautiful look.
Morning Weddings Morning weddings celebrate the newness of the life the bride and groom will now undertake. It’s usually all about freshness, and that’s reCELEBRATING... (from page S4)
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The maid or matron of honor then enters, either by herself or escorted by the best man. The ringbearer enters next. The flower girl then enters. Finally, the bride enters and takes her walk down the aisle, escorted by her father to the accompaniment of music, typically Wagner’s “The Bridal Chorus,” commonly known as “Here Comes the Bride.”
After the ceremony ends, the bride and groom will go to a side room with the officiate and two witnesses and sign the state-issued marriage license. The guests will then throw flower petals, rice, birdseed or
flected in the hair and makeup. The ceremony also tends to be less formal, so you have an excuse to forego heavy layering. • Pick a light to medium coverage foundation. The point is for skin to look dewy and fresh, not cakey. • For your blush, pick a pink shade that suits your skin tone. Remember to keep it light to match the breezy feel of your wedding. Light berries and pinks work well with to match the fresh feel of the make-up. • Since a morning wedding is less formal, you can actually opt to keep your hair down(with soft curls or waves) or a half-ponytail with waves. • Small hair ornaments or flowers are the perfect additions to morning wedding hair.
Afternoon Weddings These are great for both the couple and the guests because they don’t have to wakeup too early. Another bonus is being able to include one of nature’s wonders as you celebrate starting a wonderful life together: a sunset followed by a romantic dinner. Try the confetti over the newlyweds as they leave the church. In recent years, rice has been replaced with items such as birdseed and blowing bubbles. A photographic session is also usually held as the couple leaves the church and gets into the car to go to the reception. The reception is typically a catered course meal with drinks, numerous toasts, speeches, throwing of the bouquet, catching of the garter and the cutting of the wedding cake by the bride and groom. Dancing is usually started by the bride and groom who commonly get the first dance called the “bridal waltz.” After the first dance, a dance between the bride and her father is traditional. Often the groom
following tips for an afternoon wedding: • Pick a foundation with a longer staying power. The sun is at its hottest in the afternoon, so make sure the foundation won’t melt on you. • Get inspired with the sunset capping off your nuptials and pick either earth tones or warm corals for lips and eyes. • Keep blush light, but don’t forget to contour and highlight with bronzer or contour and highlight powders. The afternoon sun will pick up these areas, and your face will end up looking more defined. • Hair will look best looking elegant yet still relaxed. A side-swept twist or a loose up-do would do the trick. You can even finish off the look with a gold or bronze hair ornament.
Evening Weddings These usually have a more formal and stately feel. As such, you can opt for a more dramatic look with your hair and make-up. • Why not try bold colors to stand out in the dimmer lighting, but still keep it will cut in halfway through, to symbolize the bride leaving her father and joining her husband. In America, dances between the groom and his mother are also becoming popular. The newlyweds are then ready to set out on their honeymoon, which is usually a special and romantic place. In ancient Scandinavia, many brides were kidnapped by their grooms and hidden away for months, until either their family stopped looking for them or they became pregnant. Today, the honeymoon is much more pleasant and is a brief period of time for the newlyweds to avoid distractions and spend quality time alone with each other.
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looking sophisticated? Since evening make-up is all about drama, you can experiment with eye shadows. Try out a bolder color than usual or metallic shades to emphasize your eyes. Highlight your eyes by applying an extra coat of mascara and liner. You can even wing out your eye liner to create a cat-like, dramatic effect. Try out a darker or bolder lip color to match the dramatic feel of the event. Wines, plums, or even true reds would help you stand out elegantly. A gorgeous up-do would look best in an evening wedding. A French twist or a sleek up-do would be perfect to crown your wedding look, but make sure the hairstyle wouldn’t look too severe or else you’d look dated.
General Make-Up Tips Here are some more tips from Ricky Reyes to consider in picking the right hair and make-up for walking down the aisle. • Before the wedding, make sure your eyebrows have been shaped or plucked. If
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you pluck them on the day itself, they may end up looking red and swollen. If you’re working with a make-up artist and hair stylist, it would be a good idea to conduct a trial session so you would have a general idea of how it would look like before the big day and tweak the look if needed. It would be a good idea to choose waterproof products for your wedding make-up. It would less likely wash off from the elements (unexpected rain, heat and sweat, etc.) or run-off when you start tearing up.
The most important tip, though, to look gorgeous on your wedding day is to enjoy every moment and smile. After all, you are marrying the l o v e o f y o u r l i f e . (www.philstar.com)
S16 HAWAII FILIPINO CHRONICLE SUPPLEMENT