&
HUNGER
English sample based on the translation by Sverre Lyngstad, with the kind permission of Lyngstad’s heirs. Foreign rights: Gyldendal Agency – foreignrights@gyldendal.no.
A couple of weeks later I found myself outdoors one night.
I was very hungry; those ten kroner were gone all too quickly. It was now nearly three days since I had eaten anything and I felt weak.
I suffered no pain, my hunger had taken the edge off; instead I felt pleasantly empty, untouched by everything around me.
ylajali’s castle!
welcome, my knight, to me and my land!
h u r r a h !
not here.
come further still!
welcome, my love!
kiss me!
Hey!
stand up!
I felt a raw chill in my limbs.
wait a minute, you fool! you left your hat behind.
I was on the verge of crying with grief at still being alive.
Why did my prospects simply refuse to brighten up?
Didn’t I have the same right to life as anyone else?
Was I lazy? hadn’t I applied for work and listened to lectures and written newspaper articles and read and slogged away like mad day and night?
Hadn’t I lived like a miser, eaten bread and milk when I had plenty, bread when I had little, and gone hungry when I had nothing?
I lived in a godforsaken loft, a tinsmith’s shop abandoned by everybody and his brother last winter because it snowed in there.
I couldn’t make head nor tail of the whole situation.
of course, why shouldn’t I lose my keys?
... I’ve lost my keys to the gate, would you be so kind as to open it for me?
pardon ...
Yes, if I could! But the police keys aren’t here, they are in the detective department.
what am I to do then?
hmm ...
As homeless! I hadn’t thought of that. That was a damn good idea!
Go to a hotel and turn in.
But I have no money, I’ve been out in a café, you understand ...
Then go to the officer on duty and report yourself as homeless.
Thank you!
I hit upon this far-fetched name on the spur of the moment and lied unnecessarily.
name?
andreas tangen.
tangen.
occupation?
with which paper, Mr. Tangen? with morgenbladet.
the gas light will be on for ten minutes, then it goes out.
journalist!
I’m afraid I’ve been out a bit late this evening— well, we won’t mention that ... we understand.
I wasn’t sleepy and couldn’t fall asleep. I lay a while looking into the darkness.
It struck me as excessively dark and I felt its presence as oppressive.
what if I myself were to be dissolved into darkness, made one with it?
what the hell is this! ha!
«KUBOaa»! It doesn’t exist in the language, I’ve invented it. I have invented a word of great grammatical importance!
with the oddest jumps in my line of thought, I try to ascertain the meaning of my new word.
it didn’t have to mean either padlock or amusement park.
Who had said it should mean god or sunrise?
The word worries me incessantly.
I’d made up my mind what the word shouldn’t mean, but had no idea what it should mean. not tobacco factory,
or emigration.
nothing seemed good enough for this rare word.
The same brooding darkness around me, the same unfathomable black eternity which my thoughts recoiled from and couldn’t grasp. I was determined to sleep, by hook or crook.
this is what now you’re going to die!
it’s like to die,
I had gone mad!
Who said I’m going to die?
hello!
let me out!
knock knock
Don’t forget to give them tickets. they look like they need a meal.
arne simonsen, mechanic. here.
andreas tangen, journalist.
Tor hansen, fisherman.
oh dear, how did you get here?
I was out a bit late, I’m afraid, in a café, and lost my gate key ... well, that’s how it goes. Did you sleep well?
nobody offered me a ticket and I didn’t dare request one.
Like a cabinet minister! I’m pleased!
I picked up a wood chip to chew on. Why hadn’t I thought of that before!
The gate was open, the stableboy wished me good morning as usual. nice weather!
Could I ask him to lend me a krone? Yes, nice weather. Hmm.
You wouldn’t be so kind as to lend me five kroner, would you?
yes.
What a lucky dog I was to have him steal a march on me!
No, I really can’t, Jens Olai, now now.
My honour was saved.
ha ha ha!
Good grief, man!
You could just as well have asked me for an estate out in aker township.
damn it, what a smell of cooking around here!
waiter, a steak, please!
chomp chew
ylajali! come in! as you see, all of rubies.
please sit in the silk divan.
kiss me, my love ...
pardon me, would you like a glass of wine?
waiter, I ordered a steak ...
my name is tangen, cabinet minister.
your arms are like amber ...
a few sheets of paper were my sole possessions.
chomp chew
chew
The old green blanket HAD BEEN lent to me by hans pauli some months ago ...
Listen, jens olai, I’m pretty sure I’ll have something for you this afternoon.
hans pauli!
If he had a krone he didn’t begrudge it. I would get it as surely as if I already held it in my hand.
good day, I’m here to see pettersen, the student.
Pettersen? the one who used to live in the attic? he moved. where to?
chew p chom
I don’t know, but he asked to have his letters sent to Hermansen on Tolbod street.
student pettersen? he’s staying at Bernt anker street number 10, the attic.
If you’re going there, would you be kind enough to take along a couple of letters for him?
H. P Pettersen Stud. theol. – gone home.
gone home!
gone home!
I will tell you one thing, my dear lord – you are a so-and-so!
I’ll be damned, but you are a real so-and-so!
levion, the parson! ha ha!
snap
you know, now you should go and visit levion, the parson.
You hunger and thirst for wine and milk and receive them not.
You don’t want to? Then I won’t go another step with you!
say You are sorely troubled, fighting an awesome battle with the powers of darkness.
Conscience, you say? No nonsense now; you’re too poor to afford a conscience.
So, down with your head, a little more ...
The pastor? He’s gone out, is it something special?
Not at all!
We were just having such lovely God’s weather that I felt like walking out here.
No, not at all. I just take walks like this every now and then, to get some exercise after dinner.
Perhaps you’d like to leave a message or something?
What had I gained, then, by this long walk?
Sign: Coffins bargain
the office was closed.
what if I removed my coat buttons, how much would I get for them?
“Well, you see, one has become rather poor.”
p na
s
“Worn-out, you say? Mind your tongue, please! I’d like to see the person who wears out fewer buttons than I do.”
It’ll be all right, see!
ap
sn
ap
sn
good day!
he’s not in.
you’re lying!
I must talk to him, it’s urgent. an important report!
why can’t you tell it to me?
to you?
Is the editor here?
OH, HELLO! IT’S YOU, SIT DOWN.
I HAVE ANOTHER ARTICLE. I’VE TAKEN SUCH PAINS WITH IT, IT HAS COST ME MUCH EFFORT. EVERYTHING YOU WRITE PROBABLY COSTS YOU EFFORT; BUT YOU’RE TOO HIGHLY STRUNG.
THERE IS ALWAYS TOO MUCH FEVER.
DID I DARE ASK FOR A KRONE? HE WOULD BE SURE TO HELP ME; IT WASN’T THE FIRST TIME. BUT THE LAST TIME I SAW HIM HE’D COMPLAINED ABOUT MONEY.
I BEG YOUR PARDON– SIT DOWN.
Oh, any time you pass by, in a couple of days or so. is there anything else?
No, cough, when may I drop in again?
This man’s friendliness seemed to be boundless, and I would know how to appreciate it. sooner starve to death.
You should be ashamed!
could you really dream of asking this man for a krone and once again cause him embarrassment?
by god, that’s the rudest thing I’ve ever heard! Rushing at a man and nearly scratching his eyes out just because you need a krone!
whimper
So, move on! Faster, you lout! I’ll teach you!
sob
Utterly exhausted, I sat there without doing a thing, sat still and starved. My chest was most affected, smarting awfully with a curious burning sensation.
Nor would chewing wood shavings help anymore; my jaws were tired of their fruitless labour and i let them rest.
On top of it all, a piece of brown orange peel I had found in the gutter and immediately started gnawing at had made me nauseous.
At this moment my mind was lucid: I was going to die. It was autumn now and everything had gone to sleep.
I indulged myself sentimentally with this thought.
Wasn’t it a matter of indifference whether the inevitable happened one day earlier or one day later?
clack clack
clack
How are you, old man? what, are you sick?
God help us, what a face!
what was the matter with my face?
had I really started dying?
What, exactly, did I look like?
the devil only knows why ...
And where the hell has it gotten me?
... one has to be turned into a veritable freak just because of hunger!
God help us, what a face, eh?
Yes, but what shall I do?
you should go and ask to be locked up.
Locked up? Of course, I was mad; he was right.
But not locked up, not that! I would be confined in a dark cell again.
There were other ways open which I hadn’t yet tried.
There was Cisler, the music dealer, I hadn’t been to him at all. I had been there often in the good old days to buy sheet music.
simply no. no explanation. Not a word. no.
Hmm. I’m really terribly run-down, quite sick ...
... It certainly won’t be more than two or three days before I can pay you back. If you would be so kind?
My dear man, why come to me? You are a perfect stranger, come in off the street.
Only for tonight, the office is closed now and I’m very hungry!
He kept shaking his head, continued to shake it even after I had my hand on the latch.
My dread of the cell pursued me all along, refusing to leave me alone.
Can I help you?
I entered a small yarn shop, a place where I had never set foot before.
He’s hiking in the Jotunheimen mountains, is it something special?
Is the boss in?
It’s about a few øre for a meal, I’m hungry and I haven’t got a single øre.
Oh, don’t turn me away – not now!
then you’re as rich as I am.
My dear man, do you want me to steal from the till? Yes, take five øre from the till.
that’s it! I’ve had enough of this.
I dragged myself out, sick with hunger and hot with shame.
Really, this would have to stop! Things had gone too far with me.
I had held my head above water for so many years, I’d Kept upright in such hard times.
Now I’d lowered myself to the crassest sort of panhandling, shedding tears in front of petty shopkeepers.
And what good had it done me? I had managed to make me disgusted with myself.
I had now done everything I could, no stone had been left unturned. That a whole day should go by without my succeeding even once! If I told that to someone, nobody would believe me, and If I wrote it down they would say it had been fabricated.
But the buttons!
There might still be a way out.
I hadn’t tried with the buttons yet.
I would certainly get ten øre for them, tomorrow I would get ten more someplace or other, and Thursday I would be paid for my newspaper article!
he he
Imagine forgetting the buttons!
I have brought something I wanted to ask if you could use ... something that was only in my way at home – a real nuisance, some buttons.
Well, what about those buttons?
Could you let me have a few øre for them? As much as you see fit. For those buttons?
Just enough for a cigar or–
for those buttons?
Naturally I would throw in my glasses, too. that goes without saying. Just ten øre, or five? You know that I can’t lend you anything on your glasses, I have told you so before.
But I need a stamp, I can’t even mail the letters that I’m going to write. May God bless you, now be on your way!
the buttons are almost new; I can’t understand he wasn’t interested. Oh, it’s you! bump
Pardon me.
My Goodness, you look a mess! What were you doing down here?
Oh – I had some business. You’re going there too, I see.
Yes. what did you bring?
what the hell! No, this is going too far!
goodnight.
All right, if you will be quick–
no, wait a moment!
Of course, but I don’t believe you, idiot you are. You’d better come with me.
Half past seven, yes! But it’s eight now.
See this watch in my hand? That’s what I’m taking down there.
What should I wait for? He was on his way to «Uncle» himself.
I can’t! I’ve promised to be in Bernt Anker street at half past seven, and–
So, in with you, you hungry sinner! I’ll get at least five kroner for you.