Creative Loafing Tampa — April 16, 2020 by Chava Communications

2 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

BUS-LOAD OF ESSENTIALS!

CALL YOUR NEAREST LOCATION FOR PRICING AND AVAILABILITY

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4 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

PUBLISHER James Howard EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf FOOD CRITIC Jon Palmer Claridge

ory

CONTRIBUTORS John Allman, Jeffery C. Billman, Angelina Bruno, Paul Catala, Gabe Echazabal, Chris Fasick, Julie Garisto, LJ Hilberath, Erin Hughes, Alexandria Jones, Eliot Mayo, Peter Meinke, Nano Riley, Jennifer Ring, Melissa Santell, Cathy Salustri, Eric Snider, Resie eaWorld in February, animal Waechter, SKrights West

DESMOND ALEXANDER FOSTER

tion ................. 5 ory

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INTERNS Katlynn Mullins, James Bennett III

SeaWorld animal rights any don’t in seeFebruary, a parallel between the kind PHOTOGRAPHERS claiming the practice of keeping wild nd theNicole practice of Nick displaying Abbett, Cardello,animals Kimberly DeFalco, dangerous. But even though public Dave Phil DeSimone, Todd king for tooDecker, much? Or is it time forFixler, a Brian many don’t seeTracy a parallel between Mahar, May, Marlo Miller,the Jesskind Phillips, animals? Michael M. Sinclair, Kelsey Walker, Chip Weiner,

and the practice of displaying animals asking for too much?James Or is Ostrand it time for a t” animals? SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES

Anthony Carbone, Scott Zepeda

Music: Tampa Bay Blues Fest ........................... 40

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND

Music Week ................................................... 42 EVENTS DIRECTOR

It’s like listening in on the conversation the cool kids are having.

Alexis Quinn Chamberlain Music: review: Tampa Bay Blues Fest ........................... Concert Artic Monkeys ..........................40 42

Local podcasts that’ll get you through quarantine, p. 29.

Music ................................................... 42 The ListWeek .......................................................... 46

STREET TEAM

Concert review: Artic Liz Monkeys .......................... 42 Movie reviews 63 Nate..................................................... Lamb, MacLean, Daniel Nolan, Paola Otero, Jason Rivera, Shomy Rodriguez, TheWill List .......................................................... Free Astrology .........................................46 64 Abbey Turner

Movie ........................................................... reviews..................................................... 63 Puzzler 66

Free Will Astrology ......................................... MEDIA GROUP 64 Savage LoveEUCLID ...................................................... 69 CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER Andrew Zelman Puzzler ........................................................... 66 CHIEF OPERATING OFFICERS Savage Love ...................................................... 69 Chris Keating, Michael Wagner VP OF DIGITAL SERVICES Stacy Volhein DIGITAL OPERATIONS COORDINATOR Jaime Monzon

cltv

euclidmediagroup.com cltampa.com cldeals.com clspace.com EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa is a weekly newspaper covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum. They do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

NEWS+VIEWS ...................... 7 FOOD+DRINK ......................13 A&E ................................... 29 MUSIC ............................... 33 ASTROLOGY....................... 36 SAVAGE LOVE .................... 37 CROSSWORD ..................... 38

Creative Loafing Tampa is published by Tampa Weekly, LLC, 204 E. Henderson Ave. Tampa, FL 33602. The newspaper is available free of charge at locations throughout Tampa Bay and online at cltampa.com. Copyright 2020, Tampa Weekly, LLC.

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The good in the bad

I melted down on Tuesday. By Ray Roa

think it’s week five of “the after.” A lot of this— the worry, the dread, and the fear and, for some, the boredom—is starting to feel routine. Having Netflix (and a few beers on a good night) put me to sleep seems like a ritual. Not having to wear underwear at the desk—well, that’s a perk. But overall, my new movements are starting to feel very familiar. And not in a comfortable way. On Tuesday, I kind of melted down and vented to our publisher about something, this, that, or the other. I was just frustrated, and the concerns about how our mighty contributors and the five remaining staffers at CL can build a paper that will bring our laid off colleagues back probably got the best of me. I apologized later. James Howard—who’s been at the helm of this alt-weekly for the better part of three decades—said I didn’t have to say sorry. James is an eternal optimist, but he understood how the stress of a month of all this got to me. I’m sadly starting to get used to not being in the office. It felt like a special occasion this week when I stopped by to see my colleagues for meetings. And being there led me to a story which reminded me that there’s still a lot of good to look for—and find—in these trying times. CL’s Digital Editor Colin Wolf—who’s also in charge of digital strategy for all seven papers

at Euclid Media Group—said that his landlord came by to mow the lawn at the house that he, his wife and their three-year-old rent. It’s a nice thing that the landlord does. Colin said the landlord must have noticed a healthy number of grassless patches, filled with sandy dirt, where his son’s playthings were. To the landlord, bats, balls, and the paraphernalia kids have in their yards must’ve looked out of place covered in dust because he called Colin’s wife to tell him that he was gonna find some sod to put down in the yard. That’s a really nice thing to do—especially when so much of the world is wondering how the hell it’s going to make rent next month anyway. That story was just one thing that I happened to hear about on a bad day. And it was enough to get me through. But stories like that are still happening all over Tampa Bay. You’re still here reading about it, and that’s just as special. We’re all hanging onto things from our lives in the before time. And while the world we knew won’t look the same as it did before the coronavirus arrived in it (seriously, did you know the State Theatre has a new name?), what emerges will still have a lot of good to look for—and find—when these trying times fade and better ones emerge. So we’ll keep searching for it. We appreciate all the emails and messages telling us about the good things you see. We also appreciate the negative Facebook comments. It’s comforting to know that you’re all looking for something good (and bad, we guess). It’s just reassuring to know you’re still out there. And we’re glad to be here this week, too. So until next time, let it out when you’re feeling overwhelmed—then try and find some shred of happiness to hold onto.

“My new movements are starting to feel very familiar.”

6 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

OPINION POLITICS

ISSUES

OPINION

Bettering Bayshore

Is it time to redefine Tampa’s signature street? By Linda Saul-Sena

he shore of Hillsborough Bay has always been a public gathering place. Today Bayshore’s balustrade is one of our region’s most iconic features and a social link between vibrant Tampa communities. Bayshore is a residential street and our most frequented city park. However, Bayshore Boulevard’s identity has become one of a fatal divided highway that pits driver against pedestrian. The current identity of Bayshore threatens not only the lives of our residents and children but also threatens Tampa and Hillsborough County’s national prominence. The morbid reality on this street—and others in the area— directly contributes to our metro area’s rank as the ninth highest in the nation for pedestrian deaths per capita and stems from a common theme that Bayshore is dangerous by design. Wide, uninterrupted lanes on a divided freeway set inches from unprotected bike lanes and exposed, but heavily-used, sidewalks is a recipe for disaster. There are many components that have already changed and need to continue to change including enforcement, signage, and traffic controls. Bayshore is far from our county’s most dangerous street, but its visibility and cultural significance present a unique opportunity to spark the transformation needed in driver attitudes and public perception of roadway safety across our community. Every pedestrian and bicyclist incident must continuously ignite a public reconsideration of the primacy of pedestrians and the consequence of courtesy and responsibility on the road. A change in driver behavior and attitude is the most important, immediate, and impactful way to prevent another death on this and every roadway. Bayshore Boulevard has a storied history. This curving waterside roadway was created by the Works Progress Administration during President Roosevelt’s administration as a New

LONG SHOT: Can this wretched pandemic be a catalyst for removing cars from northbound lanes of Bayshore Boulevard ? Deal project to employ Americans during the Great Depression. Called “the world’s longest sidewalk”, Bayshore has functioned as a linear park, attracting walkers, skaters and bicyclists from every part of the city. The challenge is that it is also a county road with a daily traffic count in normal times of over 25,000 cars. Even before the recent senseless deaths, making Bayshore safer has been a goal for our community. “The tragedies on Bayshore and speeding throughout the city definitely show the need for a renewed look at public safety,” Bill Carlson, a Tampa City Council member told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, adding that City Council has a workshop on Bayshore and citywide speeding that is scheduled for on April 23 at 11:30 a.m. “It will be a virtual meeting that will take electronic feedback. We want to get all the feedback we can," Carsons said. "Then the transportation department and engineers will review the input and get back to us with a plan.” Forty years ago when Sandy Freedman was mayor and I served on Tampa City Council, there was a major initiative to rebuild the then-crumbling seawall which runs along the nine-mile length of the road. Freedman’s original plan was to keep the original design of road-curb-narrow, existing sidewalk. Fortunately, a group of community activists used the community access TV station to show how much safer Bayshore could be. They proposed turning a third northbound

“Many U.S. cities have closed major streets to cars.”

lane into a bike lane bounded by a widened sidewalk edged by a grass strip. These folks came to City Council with their plan and convinced Council members to support it. Council then pushed the administration into increasing the project budget and installing the safety measures. As the recognition for the need for recreation spaces has increased along with the traffic, Tampa has looked to other cities which have addressed this tension by making their parks car-free on the weekends. As the coronavirus decreased car traffic and increased recreational demand, this seemed a prime opportunity to demonstrate the value of closing the northbound lanes on Bayshore. Many U.S. cities, including New York, Detroit and Denver have closed major streets to cars and opened them to pedestrians and bicyclists to alleviate crowding on sidewalks. The problem is that these fresh areas have attracted too many people in search of safe places to be outside, thus making them unsafe. Right now our top community goal is to keep people safe from the coronavirus by discouraging crowding. Tampa Mayor Jane Castor is relying on her medical advisors that this single focus will save lives in Tampa. Castor announced on community radio station WMNF 88.5-FM that the City will be installing traffic lights at Euclid and Rome Avenues (Rome is where a bicyclist and a motorcyclist were killed onApril 4, when they collided on Bayshore.) Also, the city will work with the Tampa Hillsborough County Expressway

Authority to eliminate tolls from downtown to MacDill Air Force Base to encourage greater use of that artery for service people. Mariella Smith, a Hillsborough County Commissioner told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the county needs to allow the City of Tampa to take responsibility for decisions for the county roads within its boundaries. “The county should pay for a portion of the improvements, but the city should be empowered to design the roadways.” Alex Engelman, the founder of Take Back Tampa, told CL that, “Bayshore Blvd is currently engineered for cars; it should be designed for people.” His group’s mission is to close the waterside lanes to vehicular traffic and create a scenic byway on the landside lanes that can alternate traffic patterns to accommodate rush-hour volumes. Now more than ever during the coronavirus public health crisis, Bayshore Boulevard and Bayshore linear park are our areas most visible intersection of pedestrian and commuter interests. At a time of mass closures, it was Bayshore the park that remained our strongest link to our city and each other. When it is time to emerge from this defining moment together, we will gather again on Bayshore—to honor the past with vision for the future.” If safety is our goal, then this is not our perfect time to promote the transformation of the north bound lanes. Let’s get past this health crisis, refine our plans and be prepared to build a coalition to fund the necessary changes.

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 7

8 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

It’s Biden’s party now

Joe Biden views himself as a bridge. To where, exactly?

n January 20, 2021, Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. will be 78 years and 61 days old. If he wins in November, he’ll not only be the oldest man to ever take the oath of office, he’ll also be the oldest man to ever be president. Ronald Reagan completed his second term just before his 78th birthday. On January 20, 2025, Biden will be 82 years and 61 days old, older than all but eight presidents when they died. There’s no indication that Biden is physically unwell. (For the record, if Donald Trump completes a second term, he, too, will become the oldest president in U.S. history—and he believes exercise drains your life force.) Last year, the American Federation for Aging Research assessed the health, longevity, and survival prospects of presidential candidates. It gave Biden a 79% chance of living through his first term and a 70% chance of surviving his second. (Trump has an 85% chance of making it another four years.) And contra the memes about Biden’s allegedly declining mental state, there’s no evidence that he’s mentally unwell, either—at least beyond innuendo linked to his stutter. Not that the Trump campaign and its army of bots won’t exploit both of those things anyway. With Bernie Sanders suspending his campaign, Biden is the presumptive nominee and—on paper—the likely next president of the United States. A CNN poll last week had him up by 11 points over Trump, 53–42. A Quinnipiac poll had Biden winning 49–41. Those numbers don’t bode well for an incumbent facing an election-year recession and increasing criticism over his handling of a deadly pandemic. Trump will spend the next six months trying to make the country hate Joe Biden. Biden will spend that time reminding disaffected lefties that two liberal Supreme Court justices are in their 80s, contrasting his reputed decency with Trump’s amorality, and trying to make the election a referendum on the incumbent. Maybe that will be enough. But though strong on paper, Biden has a number of chinks in his armor—one of which has historically been an especially bad omen: enthusiasm. His support is wide but shallow. There’s

no palpable energy about Ridin’ with Biden on the No Malarkey Express. (A campaign whose agenda boils down to unplugging the country and plugging it back in hardly makes you tingle, does it?) Relatedly, Grandpa Joe never caught on with Millennials and Gen Zs, who have little interest in reverting to the ante-Trump status quo. To his credit, Biden seems aware that he represents the past. “Look,” he said last month at an event with Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, California Senator Kamala Harris, and New Jersey Senator Cory Booker, “I view myself as a bridge, not as anything else. There’s an entire generation of leaders you saw stand behind me. They are the future of this country.” Then there’s the disturbing sexual assault allegation lodged by former Senate staffer Tara Reade. Other women have said Biden touched them inappropriately but in ways that didn’t rise to the level of assault. Reade’s 27-year-old claim won’t be fatal to the campaign unless more allegations like it come to light. Its pall, however, will allow Trump to deflect from his own sexual misconduct. That brings us to the question of a running mate. Despite the drama that surrounds VP selections every four years, they tend not to matter much. They don’t swing elections. At most, an effective choice fills a resume gap or sends a signal to tenuous supporters. Given the circumstances, though, Biden might be the exception that proves the rule. He’s said he’ll pick a woman, which is smart. Beyond that, he needs someone who can forcefully articulate a vision, infuse his campaign with energy, and, ideally, liaise with progressives. And as a soon-to-be octogenarian, he also needs a plausible replacement. To my mind, all of that should point to Elizabeth Warren. But I doubt that’s where Biden’s headed. Warren is 70, older than Biden wants. She’s also well to his left. And he has plenty of viable alternatives. There are women of color, including Kamala Harris, who, despite her much-to-be-desired history as a prosecutor, has a solidly progressive voting record; the electrifying but inexperienced Stacey Abrams of Georgia; and Asian-American

GAGE SKIDMORE

By Jeffrey C. Billman

INFORMED DISSENT

“To his credit, Biden seems aware that he represents the past.”

CROSSING IT: Joe Biden’s support is wide but shallow. Senator Tammy Duckworth of Illinois, who lost both of her legs when her helicopter was shot down in Iraq. There are also women from swing states (though the home-state advantage is a myth), including the Trump-antagonizing Governor Whitmer; Senator Tammy Baldwin of Wisconsin, who would be the first (openly) LGBTQ person on a national ticket (I see you, James Buchanan); and Senator Amy Klobuchar of Minnesota, the darling of editorial boards.

I don’t know if Biden’s pick will mean anything in November. If we’re in the Second Great Depression and Trump’s approval is in the 30s— even if we’re limping out of a recession and he’s in the low 40s—probably not. But if he views himself as a bridge to the political future, his choice will say a lot about what he thinks that future looks like. @jeffreybillman

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 9

GAGE SKIDMORE

TAKE THE NEXT EXIT: Democrats, sans Bernie and Sen. Elizabeth Warren, quickly coalesced around Joe Biden.

Bern, out

May the best functioning adult win. By Lee DeVito

t Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s coronavirus quarantine editorial offices, we were saddened by the news that progressive candidate Bernie Sanders dropped out of the 2020 presidential race. In many ways this was no surprise. Though Sanders still had a shot when he earned our endorsement a million years ago last month, the tide was already turning when former Vice President Joe Biden, who had been struggling at the polls, won the South Carolina primary thanks in part to older Black voters. The party, sans Bernie and Sen. Elizabeth Warren, then quickly coalesced around Biden, with the other moderate candidates dropping out and throwing their support behind him. Sanders’ official exit from the race now makes former Biden’s clinching the Democratic Party nomination all but certain. There are a number of things that are fucked up about this recent turn of events, notably that the candidate whose platform called for universal health care lost at a time when millions of Americans have been suddenly thrown off of their private health insurance due to the coronavirus shutting down the economy. We wonder if the primaries had been held just weeks later how the results would have changed. We’re also disappointed in Biden’s proximity to the Ukraine scandal, the credible rape allegations against him, and the fact that he’s a terrible public speaker. Also, “No malarkey!” is... not a very inspirational campaign slogan. On the other hand, President Donald Trump

also has proximity to the Ukraine scandal, credible rape allegations, and an inability to speak in full sentences, so at least it’s a level playing field, we suppose. And for all his faults, Biden seems to have his shit at least slightly more together than Trump. Still, we’re dismayed that, once again, the presidential race has been reduced to lesser-evilism. During this dark time, we’re buoyed by the belief that though Sanders may have lost another presidential election, that the movement will live on. His widespread support from younger voters all but assures this. “As you all know, we have never been just a campaign,” Sanders wrote in an email to supporters after his announcement. “We are a grassroots multi-racial, multi-generational movement which has always believed that real change never comes from the top on down, but always from the bottom on up. We have taken on Wall Street, the insurance companies, the drug companies, the fossil fuel industry, the military industrial complex, the prison industrial complex and the greed of the entire corporate elite. That struggle continues. While this campaign is coming to an end, our movement is not.” So with the knowledge that Sanders’ progressive movement will march on, we’re hoping for better luck next time. In the meantime, we’re officially changing our 2020 endorsement to... Any Functioning Adult. May the best functioning adult win. Editor’s note: This piece originally ran in CL sibling paper Detroit Metro Times, but totally reflects the way CL feels.

POLITICS

“’No malarkey!’ is... not a very inspirational campaign slogan.”

10 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

Shit Happened WEDNESDAY 08

A CL Facebook post shared the story, “Here’s how to narc on your Tampa Bay neighbors for violating coronavirus rules,” and the Internet calls the alt-weekly a bunch of Nazis. Snitches apparently still stitches get when a global pandemic strikes.

GISELE/INSTAGRAM

A “Florida boy” visiting home from Georgia became an honorary Florida Man after catching a 33-inch snook near Tampa Bay—using only Publix fried chicken as bait. Fish love that salty crunch, too, apparently. During an appearance on Howard Stern’s SiriusXM show, Tom Brady pretty much says he would appreciate it if you stopped parking your dumb boat behind his Tampa house. The morons aren’t there to see you though, Tom.

SUNDAY 12

Tampa Bay learns that the XFL laid off the majority of its league and team employees, which means the Tampa Bay Vipers’ future is also looking grim. This bites.

GREG WOLF XFL

FRIDAY 10

SATURDAY 18

FOX Sports Sun starts airing every win from the Tampa Bay Lightning’s 2004 Stanley Cup run where then-captain Dave Andreychuk & co. defeated the Calgary Flames in a thrilling seven-game series. We get to spend the summer watching a Cup run after all. Wipe your ass with this tearsheet, and then visit cltampa.com/news to read about more shit that happened.

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 11

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ADOBE

RESTAURANTS

Feeling green By Jessica Bryce Young

to answer your questions. Your smarties are: Keith Schneider, a UF/IFAS professor of food safety; Andrea Nikolai, a family and consumer sciences agent with UF/IFAS Extension Polk County; Amy Simonne, professor of food safety and quality. Should people try to leave their groceries in their car or garage for a period of time to prevent the spread of COVID-19? Schneider: First off, don’t leave any perishable foods outside, that could lead to a foodborne illness. Next, there is no evidence that COVID-19 is foodborne. If you’re worried about the surfaces of the food items carrying the virus, the best advice is to wash your hands after stocking these items.

DINING GUIDES

JUST ADD SOAP? Ingestion of soap and detergents can cause gastrointestinal distress.

Experts answer Florida’s most paranoid grocery-disinfecting questions. f you’re anything like us, your first attempt to get groceries delivered without touching, well, anything was a comedy of errors: Disinfect the screen door handle that the delivery guy touched! Pick up the bags with a Lysol wipe! Do we need to wipe off all the packages? Do we need to spray the veggies with bleach? Here, finally, is some clear guidance from the experts. The University of Florida has asked three scientifically qualified smarties from the Institute of Food and Agricultural Sciences

RECIPES

We’ve been fielding questions about wiping down cans and boxes with sanitizers. If consumers want to wipe boxes or cans with sanitary wipes, they need to make sure that these chemicals do not contact the food, as some of these chemicals can be harmful if consumed. If you feel you are in a high-risk group, you can use sanitizing wipes to wipe down boxes and can, but this is not recommended. Hand-washing before and after shopping, and social distancing, are still the best methods to reduce disease. Produce is another area about which we get a lot of questions. Again, there is no evidence that COVID-19 is foodborne. Washing fresh produce before eating is a good idea to remove soil. You don’t have to wash pre-bagged salad mixes, as they have been washed. It is NOT recommended to wash produce with dish soap or any detergent at home. These household detergents or soaps can be dangerous and can lead to vomiting and diarrhea. I can’t repeat this enough: As of now there is no evidence of foodborne transfer. No such warning from CDC has been issued. The best advice is to wash your hands before and after shopping.

FOOD SAFETY

Can we use cash to make purchases? Schneider: Yes you can, but cash should be

treated like any other surface you touch. After touching anything that another person has touched, you need to wash your hands or use a gel sanitizer. This is especially problematic when you’re going through a drive-through where soap and water are not available. Should people disinfect groceries? Schneider: There’s no need to disinfect groceries to prevent COVID-19, health officials say. Numerous sources, including the CDC, echo this. Nikolai: Minimize your risk upon entering a grocery store. Use hand sanitizer when entering the store and sanitize or wash your hands as soon as possible after leaving. Many grocery stores are following CDC guidelines on cleaning and sanitizing. Sanitize your shopping cart handle before you begin shopping. You can protect yourself and others by following a couple of suggestions. First, avoid touching multiple produce items when making selections. If possible, use hand sanitizer before and after selecting produce items. Also, avoid touching surfaces or items unnecessarily. And, avoid touching your mouth, nose or face. It’s an important new habit to practice these days. Second, try to maintain social distancing as much as possible. It’s hard to resist visiting when you see a friend or neighbor, but shopping trips are no longer social outings. Limit

personal interactions and try to maintain a 6-foot distance. If another shopper is too close for comfort, kindly ask for safe space. Some stores have placed floor decals for safe spacing near registers – a great idea that will help us help one another. Simonne: We’re hearing about people wearing gloves in grocery stores. This is not always a good thing if you put the gloves on without washing your hands first. If you don’t change gloves properly, you can cross-contaminate different things.

“There is no evidence of foodborne transfer of COVID-19.”

Should people wash or soak fruits or vegetables in soapy water for 20 seconds? Schneider: No. There is no evidence of foodborne transfer of COVID-19. Ingestion of soap and detergents can cause gastrointestinal distress. Simonne: Some doctors tell people to wash fruit and vegetables with soap. This is a “no-no.” Here are tips from the FDA that UF/IFAS Extension recommends. Wash your hands for 20 seconds with warm water and soap before and after preparing fresh produce. If damage or bruising occurs before eating or handling, cut away the damaged or bruised areas before preparing or eating. Rinse produce before you peel it, so dirt and bacteria aren’t transferred from the knife onto the fruit or vegetable.

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 13

NAKED FARMER

your

local & organic

FARM-TO-DOORSTEP: Just some of the Naked Farmer’s deliverables.

Naked ambition

grocery store since 1987

How a local company adjusted to the coronavirus and changed its DNA forever.

We Deliver groceries

By Alexandria Jones

he novel coronavirus created a lot of changes within the Tampa Bay restaurant community , but it caused one company to switch up its entire look. Naked Farmer founder-owner Jordan Johnson’s initial idea was to open a brick-and-mortar. Those plans came to a halt when he pivoted to a digital farmer’s market to combat the effects of the pandemic . He says healthy, fresh foods should be accessible at affordable prices, no matter the circumstances. “Working in the food industry, I realized how broken the food system is. I think Naked Farmer is the answer to fixing it,” he explains. When food is scarce at some grocery stores, Johnson wants to provide real food with nutritional value to those having issues finding it. He says Naked Farmer sets up a direct supply chain between farmers and consumers while building a better food system one meal at a time. This gives farmers the opportunity to share their harvests outside of canceled markets. “Our community has access to real food and our farmers don’t have to go out of business. We are providing them with a demand for their harvests at a time when revenue dropped to almost zero,” he says. The veggie-forward concept sources food from vendors within a 500-mile radius. Customers can choose from grass-fed beef, free-range chicken, and salmon or select from a list of healthier vegan, vegetarian, and gluten-free alternatives.

Until the 1600-square-foot space opens in downtown St. Petersburg, boxes containing meal ingredients and cooking instructions are on sale at the digital farmer’s market, starting at $18 for a vegetable-only box. Johnson says the demand for the boxes is high, so they’ll remain an option once he opens the brick-and-mortar. “The boxes are part of the company’s DNA now. With all this down time, people are enjoying becoming home cooks and we love being part of that story,” he says. Customers can order the boxes online through Naked Farmer’s website, which says harvests vary on a weekly basis. When placing orders, guests can opt for pickup in person or delivery within a five-mile radius. “Some people even preorder and reserve their boxes for pickup or delivery at a later date,” says Johnson. Naked Farmer has two pickup locations: its upcoming restaurant location at 200 Central Avenue in St. Petersburg and Holy Hog BBQ’s Downtown Tampa location at 302 E. Kennedy Blvd. UberEats is another option for delivery as well, although Johnson recommends ordering directly from the website. Both locations offer daily pickup and delivery from 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Johnson plans on officially opening the St. Pete Naked Farmer location mid-April. Due to the pandemic, a grand opening celebration is on hold for now. An announcement about the Tampa location is to be determined. In addition to the healthy foods, wine and local beers are on Johnson’s “fine-fast” lunch-and-dinner-only menu. “It’s fine-dining quality food, but served with hustle. The emphasis is around locally-sourced foods from farmers we know,” Johnson said.

LOCAL FARMS

“Our community has access to real food and our farmers don’t have to go out of business.”

naturesfoodpatch.com

clearwater

1225 Cleveland St 727.443.6703 14 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

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CL’s most recently reviewed restaurants Parlor House Bistro Chef Ryan Steffensmeier’s new French restaurant is a cozy addition to the Dunedin scene. Entrees deliver classic bistro dishes in fine form. The super tender filet mignon has a perfectly-charred crust plus delightful green peppercorn cognac cream sauce with Lyonnaise potatoes and surprisingly full-flavored confit carrots with grill marks 1757 Main St., Dunedin. parlorhousebistro.com

HHH½

Counter Culture James Beard-nominated chef Jeannie Pierola has outdone herself with her latest concept, Counter Culture, in Tampa. Our critic gushes over the menu and decor, while marveling at Pierola’s attention to detail. According to JPC, you’re safe ordering anything, but make sure to start with the tuna tartare appetizer, which he says is simply perfection. 2909 W. Bay to Bay no. 100, Tampa. cc-tampa.com

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Olivia Chef Chris Ponte’s latest venture (pictured below) is an upscale Italian trattoria in South Tampa showing the care and thoughtfulness of a chef at the top of his game. An all-star on the menu is the Bucatini, which leads your tastes buds on an tangled adventure filled with smoked guanciale nuggets from tender pork cheeks, and plenty of sharp black pepper for pungency to balance the creamy carbonara sauce. Be prepared for a wait, even with a reservation. 3601 W. Swann Ave., Tampa. oliviatampa.com

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Rox Rooftop Bar The most sweeping panoramic view of Tampa Bay of any watering hole in the region comes with carefully crafted cocktails at this indoor-outdoor bar. Along with the unparalleled views and splendid sips, the food matches the high standard with eats like a citrus grilled achiote shrimp taco topped with shreds of cabbage and pickled kohlrabi, plus some heat from jalapeño, and minced cilantro make for a flavorful combo. You’d need to be a pelican or osprey to get a better view. Current Hotel, 2545 N. Rocky Point Dr., Tampa. thecurrenthotel.com

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Old School Bar and Grill Stocked with TVs, giant Jenga and live music, this South Tampa restaurant serves classic bar food. If you’re a corndog fan, go for the six hand-dipped miniwagyu beef corn dogs the size of fat skewered golf balls. The juicy dogs have layered beefy flavor highlighted by corn batter that’s not at all grainy. 2202 W. Kennedy Blvd., Tampa. oldschoolbars.com

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Barterhouse Ybor City’s new show-stopper has a seasonal menu that focuses on approachable but elevated fare. The Fresh Florida fish (black grouper) wows, constructed of a luscious filet sitting on creamy cauliflower purée topped with shaved crisp Brussels sprouts and bacon surrounded by herb vinaigrette. A perfect quenelle of golden caper pistou with citrus adds a scrumptious grace note. 1811 N. 15th St., Suite A, Ybor City. barterhouseybor.com

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Is your yard ready for the upcoming dry season?

Jon Palmer Claridge is the Bay area’s longest running food critic and dines anonymously when reviewing. Visit cltampa.com/food to see an explanation of his rating system, his Top 50 Tampa restaurants of 2019 and read his new book, “Drink. More. Wine!”

Is your sprinkler system applying water where it is needed? Is your sprinkler system watering as efficiently as it can? St. Petersburg is offering a FREE check-up to make sure our customers are ready for the spring dry season. To be eligible, you must be a City of St. Petersburg water customer, and your property must: 1. Have an operating in-ground sprinkler system with timer 2. Irrigate with drinking (potable), reclaimed, or well water MELISSA SANTELL

APPLY NOW!

Visit: stpete.org/WaterPrograms Email: SensibleSprinkling@stpete.org Call: 727-892-5611 Limited time offer. Restrictions may apply. Installation of suggested modifications not included in this offer. Partial funding provided by the Southwest Florida Water Management District.

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 15

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More Tampa Bay restaurants offering takeout or delivery options. By Alexis Chamberlain and Ray Roa

irst thing: This list represents just a slice of what’s still available for pickup and delivery across the Tampa Bay area. So visit cltampa. com/food to see the most updated and completely fleshed out version. As always, tip the shit out of the waitstaff if you can, and don’t go on Yelp to complain. We’re all busting our asses off out here. 100% Vegan Kitchen, Market & Food Truck Vegan dishes, packaged goods, snacks and more. Operating 7 days a week 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. via delivery apps for pickup or delivery. 13751 N. Nebraska Ave., Tampa. 813-252-3147. facebook. com/veganinternationalco 3 Dot Dash From Wed.-Sun., Seminole Heights the vegan food stand takes orders by phone only, for pick-up or delivery by the volunteer Heights Citizens Bicycle Brigade. 6203 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-675-4522. 3 Dot Dash on Facebook 4 Rivers Smokehouse All locations have pop-up drive thru and recently added limited grocery service. Orders happening online, over the phone and via the 4 Rivers app. 844-474-8377. 4rsmokehouse.com 717 South New takeout menu available, plus cocktails for $9 each and a free roll of toilet paper with all takeout orders. 717 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-250-1661. 717south.com Affordable Catering Takeout and delivery. Family-style takeout menu available for 10 people or more. Menu changes daily, and place orders by noon the day before. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 4108 Gunn Hwy., Tampa. 813-962-1525. affordablecatering.net Alessi Bakeries Takeout and delivery. The 100-year-old Tampa staple is offering desserts, sandwiches, soups and breads. Curbside pickup available. 2909 W. Cypress St., Tampa. 813-8794544. alessibakery.com American Social The Harbour Island hotspot has family-style quarantine kits (sliders, BBQ, tacos, pizza, pasta), and is even selling a kid-friendly, make your own pizza kit that comes with balls of dough, mozzarella, pepperoni, ham, and parmesan. 601 S. Harbour Island Blvd., Tampa. 813-605-3333. americansocialbar.com/tampa Ava 20% off of all take-out orders $50 or more, plus cocktails for $9 each and a free roll of toilet paper with all takeout orders. 718 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-512-3030. avatampa.com

RAY ROA

Your car or mine’s?

Bahama Breeze Takeout and delivery. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. Multiple locations. bahamabreeze.com Bake’n Babes Delivery. Salted chocolate chip cookies and Sleazy Brownies on Ubereats. The concept has also been providing free meals for service industry workers. Contactless delivery available. Hosting a Quarantine Freak Shake challenge: build your own Freak Shake, snap a pic, and tag @bakenbabes. Winner will receive a Freak Shake party for four. Contactless delivery available. 1701 N. Franklin St., Tampa. 813-4054008. bakenbabes.com Bandit Coffee Co. Orders accepted online and via phone only for contactless pickup from 8 a.m.-2 p.m. 2662 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-201-9140. banditstpete.square.site Bella’s Italian Café The South Tampa staple is on DoorDash and operating a massive curbside pickup operation, which means you can add meatballs to your confetti spaghetti—or make a carbonara food baby—until the closures are lifted. 1413 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-2543355. bellasitaliancafe.com BellaBrava Takeout and delivery. Take-out only special: buy one pasta dish, get a second free. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 204 Beach Dr. NE, St. Petersburg. 727-895-5515. bellabrava.com Bern’s Steak House You bet the steak sandwich is on the to-go menu. A limited number of the tried and true South Tampa favorite are available—along with other items—each day, and each sale means more money for a virtual Bern’s Tip Jar where funds are being split between front and back of the house staff. 1208 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-251-2421. bernssteakhouse.com Better Byrd Takeout and delivery. Family-sized (serves 8) meal packages, plus beer and wine to go. 50% off for first responders. 4447 4th St. N., No. 1, St. Petersburg. 727-325-2973. betterbyrd.com Big Bamboo Bayside Takeout and delivery. Burgers, tacos, pizza and sandwiches. Also open for breakfast. Delivery via UberEats. 20% off if you live or work off Rocky Point Drive. 2506 N Rocky Point Dr., Tampa. 813-803-2207. bigbamboobayside.com BJ’s Restaurant & Brewhouse Guests can order online via the BJ’s App or website. “Touchless” Takeout available. Orders made through the BJ’s App and Website will also have waived delivery fees through the end of April with any $19.95 purchase. Plus, use the promo code “PIZOOKIE” for a free Pizookie. For a limited time, BJ’s is offering Half-Off Large Pizzas, $6 Take-Home Entrees (with a $9.95 purchase) prepared chilled, ready to be heated when you get home and six packs of BJ’s Beer and $10 bottles of wine (where available). Delivery is also available through Door Dash, Postmates and others. Multiple locations. bjsbrewhouse.com The Blind Goat Food & Drink Co. Specializing

DRIVE YOUR CAR-MINE’S: The Ybor City staple will walk your order out to your car. in made from scratch pizza & our famous delicious chicken wings. 15% off to go pick up, $30 for 24 wings + 6 pack, $10 for 6-pack import + dip, $10 for 4-pack craft + dip, $4 all drafts (bring your own growler), and $25 any pizza and wine. 4106 Henderson Blvd., Tampa. 813-5157962. blindgoattampa.com Bo’s Ice Cream Seminole Heights’ OG ice cream spot is still open—but for drive-thru service only. Drive by to see when the line isn’t so long, or just queue up your favorite podcast while you wait. 7101 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-302-9644. The Boozy Pig Takeout and delivery. Whole animal butchery and kitchen featuring locallyraised proteins, housemade charcuterie, and specialty sandwiches. Curbside pickup available. 3255 W. Cypress St., Tampa. 813-488-5333. @ theboozypig on Instagram Bonefish Grill Did someone say Bang Bang Shrimp? The fresh fish experts are offering delivery on all their seasonal seafood dishes via UberEats and DoorDash. For a limited time, guests can also take advantage of 20% off carryout when they call to place an order with their local Bonefish Grill. Multiple locations. bonefishgrill.com Brick House Tavern + Tap Takeout and delivery. Curbside pickup available. 10% off all take out orders. 1102 N. Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. 813350-9108. brickhousetavernandtap.com Brick Oven Pizzeria Takeout and delivery. Brick oven pizza, Italian food, wings, calzones, salads, and more. 9945 Trinity Blvd., Trinity. 727-3721302. trinitybrickoven.com Brick Street Farms St. Pete’s hydroponic, indoor city farm has launched a pop up market off 3rd Avenue, offering up a variety of fresh greens, fruits, veggies, and some staples by local partners (think: eggs, bread, sea salt, dressings, kombucha, and more). 2233 3rd Ave. S., St. Petersburg. 727-329-6608. brickstreetfarms.com

Brocato’s Sandwich Shop The East Tampa staple is still serving a limited menu—including breakfast sandwiches—for takeout only. It’s cash only, too, so bring the hand sanitizer. 5021 E. Columbus Dr., Tampa. 813-248-9977. brocatossandwich.com Brunos Bakery Cafe Takeout and delivery. Bakery and deli with fresh bread and pastries, along with Grab and Go Meals that rotate weekly. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 3993 Tyrone Blvd. N., Ste. 304, St. Petersburg. 727-347-7389. Bruno’s Bakery Café on Facebook. Buddy Brew Coffee Cafes are open for take out and curbside is available at Kennedy, Hyde Park and Sarasota locations. Delivery available through Buddy Brew Coffee Express, and the mobile Brew Truck is out and about at 3302 W. Bay to Bay, the site of Buddy Brew’s next location! Order two or more bags of beans online and get free shipping anywhere in the U.S. Multiple locations. buddybrew.com Burger 21 Family Meal Deal: $39 mix and match four of your favorite burgers (101, Cheesy, or Black Bean), includes two shareable fries, four fountain beverages or bottled waters and four cookies. 11777 Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. 813405-3595. burger21.com BurgerFi Takeout and delivery. Hormone-free Angus beef burgers, hand-cut fries and doublebattered onion rings, Wagyu Beef hot dogs with all the fixings, and the all-natural Fi’ed or grilled chicken sandwiches. Free reduced delivery and first order discounts available. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. Multiple locations. burgerfi.com Bula Kavananda Takeout and delivery. Serving ultra-high quality coffee, teas and botanical beverages. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 5803 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-444-5571. bulanation.com

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18 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

from 10 a.m.-3 p.m. 1331 W. Cass St., Tampa. 813-609-6316. cassstreetdeli.com Ceviche Takeout. All cocktails and sangria available to-go. 25% off any bottle of wine and a free quart of sangria with every take-out order of $25 or more. 10 Beach Dr. NE, St. Petersburg. 727-209-2299. ceviche.com Charann’s Takeout and delivery. Tampa original 50-year-old Philly Cheesesteak bar and grill with salads, fried and grilled foods, burgers, brunch, and more. Offering various specials posted daily on social. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 6748 Memorial Hwy., Tampa. 813-886-1199. charanns.com Cheddar’s Scratch Kitchen Family Bundles starting at $19.99, featuring heaping portions of favorite entrées, side dishes and Honey Butter Croissants. Multiple locations. cheddars.com The Cheesecake Factory Currently taking orders online or at the bakery counter. Delivery is also available through Door Dash. Multiple locations. thecheesecakefactory.com Chicken Salad Chick The southern-inspired, chicken salad concept with eight Bay area locations makes 12 made-from-scratch chicken salad flavors daily. Curbside, takeout and delivery via Uber. Multiple locations. chickensaladchick.com Chill Bros. Scoop Shop Homemade ice cream, cookies, and gluten-free waffle cones. Open for business 7 days a week from 12 p.m. to 9 p.m. for takeout and delivery via UberEats, Postmates, and DoorDash. 1910 E. 7th Ave., Ybor City. 813247-2767. chillbros.com Chocolate Pi Takeout. From-scratch desserts and craft coffee. Biscuits, savory pies, and delivery options to be available in the coming weeks. Curbside pickup available. 5207 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-774-1971. chocolate-pi.myshopify.com Ciccio Cali Healthy and nutritious bowls, pizza and wraps with a Cali infusion. Intentionally and compassionately sourced ingredients and always made with love. New promotions to be available in the coming weeks, plus the re-launch of Taco Tuesday to go. Multiple locations. cicciocali.com Cider Press Cafe Takeout and delivery. Mini menu available. $30 takeout minimum. Buy 3 pastries, get 4th free. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available via Bite Squad. 601 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-914-7222. ciderpresscafe.com Clearwater Wine Bar & Bistro Takeout for curbside pickup. Female-owned family business offering a Mediterranean & Gourmet Mexican dishes. Full menu available with 50% off all bottles of wine and beer, and $10 bottles of sangria. 482 Poinsettia Ave., North Beach Parking Plaza, First Floor, Clearwater Beach. 727-4468805. clearwaterwinebar.com Craftsman House Takeout. Sandwiches, wraps, salads, soups, sweets, coffee and espresso bar, beer, wine and smoothies. Curbside pickup available. 2955 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-323-2787. craftsmanhousegallery.com

DATZ FOOD GROUP

Byblos Curbside carryout, 25% off all menu items when using curbside carryout, no coupon or code required. You can also order delivery through UberEats, Grubhub and DoorDash. 2832 S. MacDill Ave, Tampa. 813-805-7977. byblostampa.com The C House Takeout and delivery. Continuing to offer champagne, charcuterie, cheesecake, and other consciously-crafted goods that all start with the letter ‘C’. Curbside pickup available. 6005 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-488-4813. thechouse.com Cafe Dufrain Takeout. Purchase $50 in take out and receive a $10 gift card good for all three HI Restaurant Group establishments: Cafe Dufrain, Watervue Grille and Cry Baby Cafe all on Harbour Island. 707 Harbour Post Dr., Tampa. 813-275-9701. cafedufrain.com Cafe Hey Take out. 15% off of call-in take out orders over $50. Curbside pickup available. 1540 N. Franklin St., Tampa. 813-221-5150. cafehey.com The Capital Grille Offering a Butcher Shoppe selection of uncooked steaks, hand-carved by its in-house butcher and packaged with housemade seasoning and steak butter to be prepared at home. 2223 N. Westshore Blvd., Tampa. 813830-8433. thecapitalgrille.com Capital Tacos Nationally-ranked, award-winning Tex Mex featuring tacos, burritos, bowls, nachos and salads. Offering a limited, but still large menu with well over 100+ choices, plus Create-A-Capital-Bars (make at home taco bars). Multiple locations. capitaltacos.com Carmine’s Need one of those gorgeous deviled crabs from Carmine’s? How about that baked chicken? Maybe you want a family size baked ziti or lasagna. The Ybor City favorite has you covered for takeout and curbside. 1802 E. 7th Ave., Ybor City. 813-248-3834. carminesybor.com Carrabba’s Italian Grill Pick up your favorite signature dishes such as Chicken Bryan, Pollo Rosa Maria and Chicken Marsala from your local Carrabba’s Italian Grill or get your dinner delivered right to your door. Order online at carrabbas.com. Use code ‘SPRING15’ to receive 15% off your order or for Free Delivery, use code ‘SPRINGFREE.’ Multiple locations. carrabbas.com Cask Social Kitchen Takeout and delivery. Special menu available. Kids eat free with purchase of each adult meal on orders placed directly with the restaurant over the phone. Other eligible offers include 20% off total order (cannot be combined with other offers). Delivery available through DoorDash and GrubHub. Curbside pickup available. 208 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-251-0051. casksocial.com Cass St. Deli The NoHo, New York-style deli was already fighting construction in front of its doors, but the crew led by chef Suzanne Crouch keeps soldiering on with a bevy of short-distance delivery and curbside options including meals for two, the family, vegans and even snack packs. Call

DOCTOR’S ORDERS: Ray Lampe can cause meat sweats if you want him to. Cru Cellars Sommeliers are picking wines for every price range, and a special menu—plus ready-set grocery bags and “survivor packs”— is available for curbside pickup or delivery. A menu is online, but not all wine inventory is on the web. 2506 S. MacDill Ave., Tampa. 813-8311117. crucellarstampa.com Currents Restaurant Takeout and delivery. Seafood, steaks, burgers and more. Full and half portions available, sides and salad. Available Monday through Saturday 4 p.m to 8 p.m. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 200 E. Tarpon Ave., Tarpon Springs. 727-940-5377. currents-tarpon.com Daily Eats Takeout and delivery. Bottled mimosas for $6.50. Plus, food menu available, and 50% off for first responders. 901 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-868-3335. ilovedailyeats.com Datz Serving takeout and delivery. Quarantine Meal Kits at both the Tampa and St. Pete locations. Vegan options available. Plus, Old Fashioneds, margaritas, and frosés to go, and build-at-home cocktail kits: $24 for class mimosa, which includes OJ and a bottle of sparkling Rey de Copas, and $40 for our ever-famous Prickly Pear mimosa, which includes OJ, a bottle of sparkling Rey de Copas, Prickly Pear cactus candy, and Prickly Pear syrup. Curbside pickup available. Use code HERE4U to receive 15% off your order. Multiple locations. datz4foodies.com Deck Pizza Takeout and delivery. 2202 W. Platt St., Tampa. 813-375-0753. deck-pizza.com Dough Takeout and delivery. Freshly made doughnuts from the comfort of your own couch, plus over-the-top cupcakes, cupcakes, buckeyes, brownies, and more. Coffee and ice cream available to go too. Add a toilet paper cake to your order for $30 for some laughs, or an Easter Bunny ear cupcake to celebrate the upcoming holiday from home. Use code HERE4U to receive 15% off your pickup order. 2602 S. MacDill Ave., Tampa. 813-902-1979 bestdoughnuts.com

Dr. BBQ Takeout and delivery. Dr. BBQ is still out here smokin’ butts and makin’ cornbread. Quarantine Date Night Kits available for $70, featuring one bottle of Nieto Senetiner Malbec, one wedge salad, shareable Hatch Chile Mac n’ Cheese, 4oz. pork brisket, 4oz. beef brisket, and one slice of peanut butter pie. Plus, curbside booze available: beer, wine, and cocktails to go. Use code HERE4U to receive 15% off your pickup order. 1101 1st Ave. S., St. Petersburg. 727-443-7227. drbbqs.com Dunedin Brewery Good news, Pinellas, you can still get some of the best wings in the county, along with tallboys, 32 oz. crowlers and assorted 16 oz. singles when you call-in and pickup at this small town staple. No walk up ordering at all. 37 Douglas Ave, Dunedin. 727-736-0606. dunedinbrewery.com Dunedin Smokehouse Takeout and delivery. Catering and beer and wine package sales available. Delivery via UberEats. Open 12 p.m. to 8 p.m. 7 days. 100% of tips received will be given to the staff out of work. 471 Main St., Dunedin. 727-736-2227. thedunedinsmokehouse.com Eddie V’s Takeout and delivery. Enjoy the Eddie V’s experience at your home with a new takeout menu, featuring Eddie V’s favorites and familystyle dinners. Also available is a selection of uncooked signature cuts of steak hand-carved and packaged with Eddie V’s signature steak seasoning prepared as you wish. Free delivery. 4400 W. Boy Scout Blvd., Tampa. 813-877-7290. eddiev.com Ella’s Americana Folk Art Café This Seminole Heights staple is slangin’ food, drink and booze. Delivery is available via the Heights Citizen Bicycle Brigade, UberEats and GrubHub. A GoFundMe has also been set up to help staff. 5119 N. Nebraska Ave., Tampa. 813-234-1000. ellasfolkartcafe.com Empamamas Stephanie Swanz, the matriarch of Armature Works’ Empamamas, was dealt a

DATZ FOOD GROUP

The Floribbean Eatery and Catering Takeout and delivery. Counter service Caribbean fusion restaurant with made-from-scratch, fresh food. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2410 Central Ave., St Petersburg. 727826-0198. thefloribbean.com Fresco’s Waterfront Bistro Takeout and delivery. 25% off pickup now through April 5th. Plus, buy one entree, get a free dessert, and spend $30, get a free bottle of champagne. 300 2nd Ave. NE, Saint Petersburg. 727-894-4429. frescoswaterfront.com Fresh Kitchen Takeout and delivery. Familysized (serves 8) meal packages, plus beer and wine to go. 50% off for first responders. 1350 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-280-0515. eatfreshkitchen.com Fuzzy’s Tacos Margaritas, plus taco and fajitas packs and more, are available at all Fuzzy’s locations, which are all participating in a “1 taco at a time” initiative that’s fed hundreds of emergency and primary care medical workers in the Bay area. Multiple locations. fuzzystacoshop.olo.com Gino’s NY Style Pizza Takeout and delivery. Two slices and a drink for $6. Curbside pickup available. 3394 Tampa Rd., Palm Harbor. 727789-6883. ginosnystyle.com Golden Dinosaurs Takeout and delivery. Vegan eats and pantry items available, plus DIY Donut boxes and $8 for mimosa pints. 2930 Beach Blvd. S., Gulfport. 727-873-6901. goldendinosaurs.com Gourmet Pizza Company Takeout and delivery. Free Breadsticks with any 16” pizza, $5 off $30 or more, $10 off $65 or more, $2 off any two 10” pizzas (excludes gluten-free crusts). Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 610 S. Armenia Ave., Tampa. 813-258-1999. gourmetpizza-company.com Graze Takeout and delivery. The new South Tampa location just reopened Easter weekend, serving up refined American fare cuisine, breakfast all day with a lunch and dinner menu and brunch on weekends. From house-made waffles to classic egg dishes and artisan cheese burgers, Graze offers “comfort food” reminiscent of the classics we all love in an unexpected atmosphere of casual elegance. Seasonal gourmet toasts flank the menu along with some healthier options. Curbside pickup available. 2217 S. Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. 813-819-2217. graze1910.com Green Lemon Takeout and delivery. Turn your self-quarantine into an at-home fiesta with $10, 24-oz. on the rocks margaritas and $45 half gallon margaritas to go. Plus, food menu available, and 50% off for first responders. 915 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-868-5463. eatgreenlemon.com Grimaldi’s Meal deals for two or four people, plus 50% off bottled wine is available at Grimaldi’s locations coast-to-coast. In addition to carry out, Grimaldi’s is open for delivery through DoorDash, Uber Eats and GrubHub. grimaldispizzeria.com Hawkers The Asian street food chain is still open

for delivery and takeout, serving a limited menu during new, temporary, hours. 1235 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-521-7253. eathawkers.com Ichicoro Ramen Takeout and delivery. Ramen kits available for delivery through Saltblock Hospitality. 5229 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813517-9989. ichicororamen.com The Independent In Seminole Heights, the Indie is slinging a limited menu to help keep staff afloat. The St. Petersburg bar remains closed. 5016 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-341-4883. independentbartampa.com Irish 31 Pub House & Eatery Takeout menu for delivery via UberEats or takeout for curbside pickup. Neighborhood Market menu available with staples such as bread, cheese and of course, toilet paper. Beer, wine, and liquor to-go available for a limited time. Multiple locations. irish31.com Jackson’s Bistro, Bar & Sushi “Fast Jack’s” takeout menu and premade protein bowls, salads, burgers, and chicken sandwiches available. Curbside pickup available. 7 a.m. to 8 p.m. 7 days. 601 S. Harbour Island Blvd., Tampa. 813277-0112. jacksonsbistro.com James Joyce Irish Pub & Eatery Takeout and delivery. Full menu and meal prep offered daily from 12 p.m. to 8 p.m. 1724 E. 8th Ave., Tampa. 813-247-1896. jamesjoyceybor.square.site Jason’s Deli Takeout and delivery. Fast casual delicatessen restaurant. Plus, catering, box lunches, family meals, meat and cheese by the pound, and loaves of bread. Curbside pickup available. 25801 U.S. Hwy. 19 N., Clearwater. 727-793-0446. jasonsdeli.com Johnny Rocket’s Guests can make call-ahead orders by calling 813-926-6335 and have food brought out curbside near cinema entrance or have Johnny Rocket’s delivered by using a third-party service apps including uberEats, DoorDash Postmates and Grub Hub. Multiple locations. johnnyrockets.com Jollibee Jollibee is delivering free meals to healthcare workers nationwide, and the Filipino fast-food favorite is still offering takeout and

drive-thru at its Pinellas Park location. Talk about Chickenjoy. 4057 Park Blvd. N., Pinellas Park. 727-551-4554. jollibeeusa.com Kaleisia Tea Lounge Takeout. Vegan, vegetarianfriendly, fresh brewed teas, smoothies and coffee. Curbside pickup available. 1441 E. Fletcher Ave., Ste. 101, Tampa. 813-977-8266. thetealounge.com Kat Dunn Williams A mini-menu of sweet baked things, including doorstep delivery. facebook. com/kdunn55 King State On March 27, the Tampa Heights coffee shop and hangout 86’s walk-in order. Everything must now be ordered by phone or online. The team will text when the order—coffee, food, bags of coffee, beer, wine and more—is ready. In recent week’s the crew has tossed out all kinds of specials, including pizza. 520 E. Floribraska Ave., Tampa. 813-221-2100. kingstate.com Kojaks House of Ribs Takeout. Family-run barbecue. 2808 W. Gandy Blvd., Tampa. 813837-3774. kojaksbbq.net La Segunda Bakery and Cafe Takeout and delivery. Breakfast and lunch, coffee, pastries, Cuban bread and a variety of other breads to go! 25% off all online orders with code: community. 4015 W. Kennedy Blvd., Tampa. 813-540-9119. lasegundabakery.com Lee’s Grocery Takeout. Stone baked pizza, wings and craft beer. 2210 N. Central Ave., Tampa. 813-374-0179. leesgrocery.com Little Greek The fast-casual Greek restaurant with an American influence will focus on takeout, curbside service and delivery plus a new grocery element. Multiple locations. littlegreekfreshgrill.com LongHorn Steakhouse Family Meal Deals starting at $9 per person for a family of four, allowing families to choose a shareable entrée, hand-chopped salad and four sides. Guests can also order fresh steak cuts from the LongHorn Steak Shop, accompanied by LongHorn’s bold proprietary seasoning and instructions from LongHorn’s expert Grill Masters on how guests can prepare them at home. Multiple locations. WORLD OF BEER

blow when the Tampa Heights food hall shut down amid coronavirus concerns. Her friend, Joe Dodd of King of the Coop, stepped up to offer part of his kitchen, however, and now the ‘mama is slinging empanadas on Ubereats. Empress Tearoom Takeout and delivery. Tearoom restaurant and bistro. Specials available online. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 12942 N. Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. 813-988-9027. empresstearoom.com Epicurean From Tues.-Sun, 10 a.m.-6 p.m., the hotel is becoming a curbside and pickup market with “several house-made specialties on the menu, including chicken and turkey sausage, smoked fish dip and tuna, pasta and potato salads,” plus made-from-scratch sauces and spices, steaks, chicken wings, crab meat, cheese, frozen and fresh veggies and more. Even dry goods like toilet paper, soap and sanitizers will also be sold based on availability. Epicurean’s extensive beer, wine, spirits and beverage list is also available, as well as house-made concoctions, like the Epic Whiskey Blend, Epic Bloody Mary mix and Port Barrel Reposado Corazon Tequila. Guests are asked to review the menu online and call in their orders; a specific pickup time will be given, upon arrival for pick-up, guests will call again and a gloved employee will bring the order to the car. 1207 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-999-8700 epicureanhotel.com/ gourmetmarket The Fat Rabbit Pub Upscale American food available for takeout. 15% off for first responders and hospitality. Curbside pickup available. 16029 Tampa Palms Blvd. W., Tampa. 813-252-3004. thefatrabbitpub.com Fitlife Foods Recently launched a 48-hour delivery option. Select a 48-hour concierge delivery that takes eight of their best-selling meals from online checkout to doorstep in less than two days. Fitlife Foods continues to give back, too. Individual store managers donated more than 1,100 meals to organizations across the state during the last week, in addition to 250 weekly meals donated to Feeding Tampa Bay. Multiple locations. eatfitlifefoods.com Flames Indian Cuisine Takeout and delivery. 15% off all orders. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2601 S. MacDill Ave, Tampa. 813-252-8069. flamestampa.com Fleming’s Prime Steakhouse & Wine Bar Takeout. $40 off your order with $100 minimum purchase through April 11th. Pick up a 3-course dinner for two to enjoy at home: 35-ounce Prime Tomahawk paired with two salads, two sides and two desserts. Available for carry out. Mention CL to redeem. 4322 W. Boy Scout Blvd., Tampa. 813-874-9463. flemingssteakhouse.com Flippers Pizzeria Takeout and delivery. Hospitality Family Discount: 50% off 16” and 13” pizzas for hotels, restaurant, convention and attraction employees. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 1054 4th St. N., St. Petersburg. 727-822-9866. flipperspizzeria.com

AROUND THE WORLD: When you order from World of Beer, you’re paying it forward, too.

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contactless delivery available. 6062 Van Dyke Rd., Lutz. 813-304-2583. nabruzzitrattoria.com Nature’s Food Patch Market & Café Takeout for deli and delivery for grocery via Instacart. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. Both locations are also offering senior hours in addition to sandwiches, smoothies, juices and other counter service items all available if you call ahead. Multiple locations. naturesfoodpatch.com Neptune Grill Takeout. Offering a varietal menu, even while somewhat limited, including Greek food, seafood, and bar food. Curbside pickup available. 5501 Shore Blvd. S., Gulfport. 727623-4823. neptunegrillgulfport.com New World Brewery The recently-reopened live music and beer hub takes to-go orders on food and booze, which means you can have the world famous New World pizzas (our favorites are the Ground Control and “Dark Side Of the Moon”) along with chef Mike’s mac ‘n’ cheese and more in the comfort of home. 810 E. Skagway Ave., Tampa. 813-304-0460. newworldtampa.com New York New York Pizza Takeout and delivery. Plus, new CBD slices and pies at Ybor City location, infused with Kore Organic CBD. Multiple locations. nynypizzeria.com Noble Crust St. Pete Takeout and delivery. Complimentary gnocchi with takeout and UberEats (limited time offer). On Sundays from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., complimentary bottle of champagne and OJ with takeout purchase of $25 or more (while supplies last). 50% off all bottles of wine. Additional offers to come. 8300 4th St. N., St. Petersburg. 727-329-6041. noble-crust.com Oggi Italian Cafe and Wine Bar Takeout and delivery. Free golf cart delivery to Davis Islands residents. Free delivery to all others via UberEats. 236 E. Davis Blvd., Tampa. 813252-7778. oggiitalian.com Old Key West Bar and Grill Takeout and delivery. Various specials available paired with drinks (Whie Claw!). Pork sandwich + fries + a beer for $10, pork dinner for two with mac & cheese + okra + coleslaw + six-pack of beer for $35, cobb salad + a White Claw for $12, 10 wings and a six pack of beer for $20, 20 wings + a bottle of Skyy vodka for $35, and more. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2451 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-623-0969. oldkeywestbarandgrill.com Oldsmar Smokin BBQ Takeout and delivery. Pork, ribs, chicken, and brisket. Daily specials available via Facebook. 120 Commerce Blvd., Ste. 1, Oldsmar. 813-328-4469. Oldsmar Smokin BBQ on Facebook Olive Garden Takeout and delivery. Starting at $12.99, enjoy two nights of comfort food with Buy One, Take One featuring featuring guests classic favorites like Chicken Parmigiana, Fettuccine Alfredo, Lasagna, Baked Ziti, Cheese Ravioli and Spaghetti with Meat Sauce. Free delivery for orders over $40. Multiple locations. olivegarden.com

STEPHANIE SWANZ

longhornsteakhouse.com Madison Avenue Pizza Takeout and delivery. Specials available online. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2660 Bayshore Blvd., Dunedin. 727-754-6144. madisonavepizza.com Magdalena’s Pizzeria Takeout and delivery. Daily Italian offerings and Filipino, Spanish, Italian fusion on weekends. $25.99 for large cheese pizza, wings, garlic knots and 2-liter of soda. 2313 W. Linebaugh Ave., Tampa. 813-2527158. magdalenapizzeriafl.com Malios Prime Steakhouse Takeout and delivery. Steakhouse and seafood. Curbside pickup available. 400 N. Ashely Dr., Tampa. 813-223-7746. maliosprime.com Maple Street Biscuit Company Takeout and delivery. Curbside pickup available. 662 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 757-353-0944. maplestreetbiscuits.co Meat Market Takeout and delivery. 15% off any order of $50 or more. Alcohol and wine for purchase available for takeout. Curbside pickup available. 1606 W. Snow Ave., Tampa. 813-2801113. meatmarket.net Metro Diner Metro Diner is offering Metro Meal Packs that feed families of 4 to 6 in a variety of bundles consisting of full entrées, hot and cold sandwiches, fresh salads and family combo platters. Available for online pickup, delivery on DoorDash and UberEats, and curbside-onrequest. Multiple locations. metrodiner.com Mermaid Tavern Takeout and delivery. Farmto-table pub-style with one of Tampa’s best craft beer and wine lists. Full package license means bottles, cans and growlers to go. Available until midnight daily. Delivery via UberEats. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 6719 N. Nebraska Ave, Tampa. 813-238-5618. mermaidtaverntampa.com Mickey’s Subs Takeout subs and sandwiches. $5 6 inch and $10 12 inch subs. 4411 N. Armenia Ave., Tampa. 813-644-4026. mickeyssubs.com Moon Under Water Limited take out menu available. All cocktails available to go, $3 bottled and canned beer, and a free quart (32 ounce) of beer with any purchase of $25 or more. 332 Beach Dr. NE, St. Petersburg. 727-869-6160. themoonunderwater.com Mott & Hester Deli Co. Takeout. Sandwiches like po’boys, muffalettas, meatball, and various deli sandwiches, plus fresh pasta made in-house and sauces, lasagna, and more. Casseroles, chickens, mac & cheese, and dirty rice also available for curbside pickup. 1155 S. Dale Mabry Hwy., No. 10, Tampa. 813-289-9758. mottandhesterdeli.com Mr. Dunderbak’s Biergarten Takeout. All meals and beer served in single use containers. Only credit cards will be accepted. 11:30 a.m. to 8 p.m. 7 days. 14929 Bruce B. Downs Blvd., Tampa. 813-977-4104. dunderbaks.com Nabruzzi Trattoria Authentic Italian like homemade pasta, pizza, desserts, steak, chicken, veal and seafood options. Curbside pickup and

NOT JOE MAMA: In Seminole Heights, King of the Coop’s Joe Dodd has invited Empamamas into his second kitchen.

On Swann After shutting down temporarily, South Tampa’s On swanna reopened for takeout only. “It’s more a matter of being of service to the community and keep hold of some of our people. We definitely won’t make any money,” Trudy Cooper, co-owner of On Swann and cofounder of Outback Steakhouse told the TBBJ. Chef Chris Ponte’s to-go menu focuses on best sellers, like the hot chicken and kale salad. The bar is open for to-go, too. 1501 Swann Ave., Tampa. 813-251-0110. onswann.com Olympia Catering & Events Takeout and delivery. American comfort foods with affordable, allergy-friendly, individually packaged options available. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2201 N. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-251-8225. olympiacatering.com Outback Steakhouse Takeout and delivery. Enjoy Outback favorites by placing an order online for curbside pickup, or have Outback delivered right to your door. Now through April 30th, you can enjoy free delivery. Delivery is also available through DoorDash in select areas. Free delivery through April 30th. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 3403 Henderson Blvd., Tampa. 813-875-4329. outback.com Pacific Counter Takeout and delivery. Mainland mix of coastal classics in the form of sushi bowls and sushi burritos. Each delivery placed online comes with free Dole Whip. Also offering toilet paper, paper towels, chicken breasts, and cupcakes. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 660 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727440-7008. pacificcounter.com Paul’s Chicago Pizza Takeout and curbside pickup available. 11002 4th St. N., St. Petersburg. 727-346-5180. paulschicagopizza.com Parlor House Bistro Take out. 15% off entire menu, plus beer, wine and cocktails to go. 1757 Main St., Dunedin. 727-754-3978. parlorhousebistro.com PDQ All PDQ locations remain open for drivethru, takeout, and third party delivery. Extended BOGO offer on chicken tender platters from 4 p.m. until close in drive-thru only through March 30th. Specific restaurant updates and

offerings can be found online. Multiple locations. eatpdq.com Pete’s General Takeout and delivery. Fresh baked bagels, breads and pastries. $1 bagels for industry folks. 495 7th Ave. N., St. Petersburg. 727-440-6183. petesgeneral.com Poke Fish Takeout and delivery. Bowls made with organic brown rice, free range chicken, salmon, carrots, and organic chicken broth. Multiple locations. eatpokefish.com Pop n Sons Take out. Delicious burgers and breakfast any time of day. Plus, free roll of toilet paper with your carry out order (normally bad advertising, but they figured you’d need a laugh). 4812 N. Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. 813875-9005. popnsons.com Psomi Pre-orders of baked goods, dips, breads, etc. Accepting special requests. Curbside pickup and e-gift cards available. 701 N. Howard Ave., Tampa. 818-415-5555. eatpsomi.com Puff n Stuff Family meals—including Easter selections—plus individual boxed lunches, desserts, buffets, platters and more delivered to your door with no contact. 813-712-7833. puffnstuff.com The Restorative Temporarily operating as “The Temporary” with a small take out menu with menu changes weekly. The first week’s menu was Italian, this week’s is Japanese, and next week’s is French. Wine and beer available for togo. 420 Patricia Ave., Dunedin. 727-223-1705. restorativerestaurant.com Rocca Limited takeout menu of ready-to-eat items, including lasagna, fresh mozzarella, and housemade sourdough and focaccia, plus pantry items to prepare at-home including freshly extruded pastas, sauces, and whole loaves of bread. Their entire wine list is also available curbside. 323 W. Palm Ave., Tampa. 813-9065445. roccatampa.com Rococo Steak Family-style and a la carte takeout options available. All cocktails available to-go (i.e. Cucumber Roe, Watermelon Spritz). 25% off all takeout bottles of wine. 655 2nd Ave. S., St. Petersburg. 727-822-0999. rococosteak.com Rooster Re-dux Three Proper House Group restaurants—including Rooster & the Till, Nebraska Mini-Mart and Gallito—are operating

STEPHANIE SWANZ

Sloppy Joe’s on the Beach Takeout. Full menu of American and Caribbean themed food along with full bar service. Curbside pickup available. Access from Gulf Boulevard or Treasure Island Beach Trail. 10650 Gulf Blvd., Treasure Island. 727-367-1600. sloppyjoesonthebeach.com Slyce Pizza Bar Takeout and delivery. Multiple locations. slycepizzabar.com Smallcakes New Tampa Takeout and delivery. Offering 12 signature gourmet cupcakes baked fresh daily and cupcake-infused ice cream. 17010 Palm Pointe Dr., Tampa. 813-442-4938. smallcakescupcakery.com SoHo Sushi Take out. 20% off all takeout, including bottled beer, wine and sake. Curbside pickup available. 3218 W. Kennedy Blvd., Tampa. 813873-7646. sohosushi.com Son of A Chef Typically, you can find the Craig family catering exclusively to the beloved Tampa Bay area film community. Now, they’re offering their goods via curbside takeout from their catering trailer which they currently have parked on a church friend’s business parking lot. Open Monday through Friday from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. with menu changes daily. 8602 Tarpon Springs Rd., Odessa. 813-363-8252 Strandhill Public Takeout. Noon to 9 p.m. 7 days. Offering the following discounts: 10% discount on all pick-up orders. 15% discount for all military personnel with valid I.D. 10288 Cswy. Blvd., Tampa. 813-442-7080. strandhillpublic.com The Stuffed Mushroom Takeout. Caterer now serving takeout meals ready- to-freeze or pop in the oven. Available Monday through Friday. Daily menus listed online. Order by 2 p.m., pick up between 2:30 p.m. and 5:30 p.m. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 825 Main St., Safety Harbor. 727-726-8686. thestuffedmyshroom.com Sweet Soul Takeout and delivery. 50% off for first responders. 1101 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-575-7100. Sweet Soul SoHo on Facebook Taco Bar Takeout and delivery. Authentic Mexican food truck in Clearwater serving up handmade tortillas, sopes, tostadas, burritos and more. 29835 US Hwy. 19 N., Clearwater. 727-238-3772. tacobarfl.com Taco Bus The Bay area taco chain is still keeping it Chido and offering takeout and delivery in addition to bus loads of essentials like frozen beef, shrimp, chicken breast, bread, toilet paper and paper towels. Online, phone, and food delivery services available. Multiple locations. taco-bus.com Taco Dirty Takeout and delivery. Family-sized (serves 8) meal packages, plus beer and wine to go. 50% off for first responders. 2221 W. Platt St., Tampa. 813-314-7900. tacodirty.com Taquitos Mexican Takeout and delivery. One free meal per customer to those out of work and in need (until further notice). Free churros on orders of $25 or more. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 9617 Bay Pines Blvd., St. Petersburg. 727-256-1617. taquitosmex.com

TBD@301 Takeout and delivery. Handcrafted tea beverages paired with Filipino food and local desserts. Kava, kratom and boba teas available. Family meals available. 5% discount on your first online delivery. 3840 US Hwy. 301 S., Riverview. 813-420-0013. tbdcafe.com Thailand Restaurant Takeout and delivery. Freshly cooked-to-order foods ranging from signature traditional Thai dishes like the Thaistyle Beef Salad, Pahd Thai, curry duck, and spicy Thai-style basil. 5252 S. Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa. 813-837-1793. thailandtampa.com TooJay’s The chain of Jewish delis is not only selling items from its menu for takeout or delivery, but also offering grocery options. What’s more is that 10% of gift card sales go to furloughed staff. Multiple locations. toojays.com Toula’s Trailside Cafe Takeout and delivery. Breakfast and lunch available Tues.-Thurs. Menu available online. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 11 S. Safford Ave., Tarpon Springs. 727-939-2403. toulastrailsidecafe.com URBAN Brew & BBQ Takeout and delivery. Scratch-made BBQ and southern food with a heavy emphasis on bourbon and craft beer. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2601 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-623-9823. urbanbrewandbbq.com World of Beer Takeout and delivery. 50% for all first responders. UberEats deliveries, spend $20 and get a free German Pretzel. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 5311 Avion Park Dr., Tampa. 813-930-5499. worldofbeer.com Vino E Pasta Takeout and delivery. Southern Italian cuisine homemade pastas and a wide selection of wine. Half off wine bottles, $6.95 lunch specials, call in and pick up your order and receive 15% off your bill (delivery excluded). Delivery available via UberEats, DoorDash and GrubHub. Curbside pickup available. 3603 W. Gandy Blvd., Tampa. 813-902-8466. vinoepasta.net WeVegan Eats The Vegan line of snacks has always been available via various outlets, and it continues to distribute good to its partners. weveganeats.com Whatever Pops & Bowls Takeout and delivery. Grilled cheeses, açaí bowls, housemade gelato

and gourmet ice pops. Two pints of gelato for $10, BOGO ice pops and a grilled cheese special available. Delivery via UberEats. Curbside pickup available. 5127 N. Florida Ave, Tampa. 813-559-7677. whateverpops.com The Wheelhouse Takeout and delivery. Full menu available daily 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. Hosting a takeout bingo game where you can fill your card to win prizes. Special meal deals for $29, 4 pack of tallboy beer for $10, plus mason jars of any craft ale, wine or sangria only $7 (includes jar), and Taco Tuesday 3 tacos for $5. 7220 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-623-0589. thewheelhousestpete.com Whiskey Cake Takeout. Craft cocktails and farmfresh comfort food. Meal kits and drink packages to-go. Call to reserve. 2223 N. Westshore Blvd., B207, Tampa. 813-535-9955. whiskeycake.com WingHouse Takeout and delivery. $9.99 for 10 wings and fries, $19.99 for 10 wings, fries, and a domestic 6-pack. 3712 W. Columbus Dr., Tampa. 813-428-7157. winghouse.com Yeoman’s Cask & Lion Takeout. 25% off for medical professionals, first responders, and hospitality/service industry workers. $34.99 for two brunch items, bottle of bubbly and OJ. Takeout beer promotion with food purchase: domestic singles $3.50, imports 4-pack $12, craft singles $4.50 or 4-pack $15. 202 N. Morgan St., Tampa. 813-224-9367. yeomanscaskandlion.com Your Pie Pizza, pasta and more made available curbside or via delivery. Multiple locations. yourpie.com Zudar’s on Platt Takeout and delivery. Since 1959, Zudar’s has been serving up soups, salads, sandwiches, burgers, entree platters and more, and they’re still churning out favorites, plus prepared meals packaged for two. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 201 W. Platt St., Tampa. 813-250-6272. zudarsw.com Zukku Zukku-Tori is a new to-go and delivery concept, Zukku-Tori, located from Michael Stewart’s 717 South Restaurant on 717 S. Howard. Order ahead online via ZukkuSushi.com and pick up at 717 S. Howard Ave or select delivery to have your meal delivered. Also available for pickup and via UberEats and DoorDash. 717 S. Howard Ave., Tampa. 813-250-1661. zukkusushi.com UBER EATS

as one takeout operation out of Rooster & the Till at Seminole Heights. 6500 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-374-8940. roosternadthetill.com Russo’s NY Pizzeria Takeout and delivery. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 727-648-4304. nypizzeria.com Rusty Bellies Waterfront Grill Small familyowned seafood restaurant offering curbside and dockside pick up. Family-style options available, plus hands-free grocery orders packaged and dropped in your car within the hour. 937 Dodecanese Blvd., Tarpon Springs. 727-9344047. rustybellies.com Safety Harbor Resort and Spa Takeout and delivery. Full menu available, including wine and spirits. All menu items 20% off through April 30th. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 105 N. Bayshore Dr., Safety Harbor. 727-726-1161. safetyharborspa.com Saltblock Catering Offering family-style meals and grocery essentials delivered right to your door, including ingredients and menu items from local restaurants and vendors. Place your meal delivery orders by 11:59 p.m. on Monday for deliveries starting on Wednesday. New menus created weekly. saltblockhospitality.com Sarge’s Smokehouse BBQ A Veteran-owned restaurant serving up barbecue. Full menu available via takeout and delivery. Healthcare professionals receive 20% off on takeout orders. 1500 W. Cass St., Tampa. 813-285-6097. sargessmokehousebbq.com Scone Age Bakery & Cafe Takeout and delivery. Organic and 100% clean, savory baked goods. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 332 Skinner Blvd., Dunedin. 727-216-3248. sconeagecafe.com Seasons 52 Mention the Neighbor to Neighbor offer when you call to receive 20% off. 204 N. Westshore Blvd., Tampa. 813-286-1152. seasons52.com Sekushi on the Beach Takeout and delivery. Sushi, dumplings and noodles. 524 Mandalay Ave., Clearwater. sekushionthebeach.com Señor Subs & Gyros Takeout and delivery. Subs, gyros, tacos, wings and more. 1364 Cleveland St., Clearwater. 727-953-3985. senorsubs.com Shrimp Boat Grille Valrico doesn’t touch the ocean, but Shrimp Boat brought it to the ‘burbs. It’s serving takeout Wed.-Sun. From 4 p.m.-9 p.m. Daily specials available via Facebook. 1020 Bloomingdale Ave., Valrico. 813-571-5858. shrimpboatgrille.com Shuffle Tampa Heights’ favorite vagina-forward bar puts a six-foot pole in its hand for carryout and delivery, including Sunday’s Wu-Tang & Biscuits brunch. 2612 N. Tampa St., Tampa. 813-450-3797. tampashuffle.com Silver Ring Cafe Takeout and delivery. Traditional Cuban sandwiches, devil crabs, stuffed potatoes, soups, sweet tea. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 7419 U.S. Hwy. 301 S., Riverview. 813-677-1487. Silver Ring Café on Facebook

WHATEVER YOU WANT: Whatever Pops’ expanded takeout options for Tampa Bay.

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BEST LARGE BREWERY IN FLORIDA ADDITIONALLY, WE WON TWO GOLD MEDALS AND ONE SILVER MEDAL FOR THREE OF OUR CRAFT BEERS.

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24 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

To-go brews and cocktails to get you through the days. By Alexis Chamberlain and Ray Roa

imes are weird, and they are hard, especially for Tampa Bay bartenders. There’s a page that’ll let you tip a random local drinkslinger every time you take a sip at home (find the link on our website). Here are some of the best places to get a cocktail packaged for you to enjoy at the house. See more via cltampa.com/ food. Did we miss your spot? Visit cltampa.com/ emergencylistings to let us know. The Hub Bar Specials on fancy whiskey sours and other drinks are available on certain days at this downtown Tampa dive, but the signature “Hub pour”—which staff translates to “four drinks at the Hub, eight drinks everywhere else”—will be the hallmark to anyone buying $20 quarts of Hub margaritas or bloody marys. 719 N. Franklin St., Tampa. (813) 229-1553. The Hub Bar on Facebook Noble Crust The St. Petersburg location is still open and brunching thanks to the free bottle of sparkling wine and orange juice that comes with any Sunday order of $25 or more. The crew is also slinging $10 mason jar craft cocktails (the Brown Butter Dram, plus classics like the Manhattan and Old Fashioned) every day of the week. 8300 4th St. N., St. Petersburg. 727-3296041. noble-crust.com Mandarin Heights The cocktails bar in Seminole Heights is packing cocktails to go, but orders must be placed by 5 p.m. on Tuesdays. A menu is available on Instagram via @ mandarinheights. 5901 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-501-9585 mandarinheights.com Miguelitos Taqueria Y Tequilas Prices on to-go skinny or premium margaritas range from $75 (one gallon) to $10 (eight ounces) at this South Tampa Mexican staple where half-gallon and 16 oz. options,, too. 2702 W Kennedy Blvd., Tampa. 813-872-5600. miguelitostampa.com Haven Enjoy SoHo sips in your skivvies thanks to drinks like the cucumber and elderflower soda. A dinner menu with apps, salad, sandwiches, plates, sides, Little Midway ice cream and the “Taste of Bern’s” section sounds like date night. 2208 W Morrison Ave., Tampa. (813) 258-2233. haventampa.com Trophy Fish Favorites (Calm Before the Storms, Pistachio Mai Tais, Salty Dogs, and Fin and Tonics) in vacuum-sealed plastic pouches complete with rosemary and candied blood orange slices garnishes. 2060 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-258-7883. trophyfishstpete.com Red Star Rock Bar The Ybor City location is

ASHLEY DUDNEY

Pour it on

closed, but Red Star’s Seminole Heights spot is open most days from 4 p.m.-7 p.m. Head there for growler fills, batch mix drinks and package. After that, check out a GoFundMe for Ybor Staff. 5210 N. Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-237-0012. Red Star Rock Bar on Facebook BREWERIES + BOTTLES 1933 Pub and Grill Curbside service for growler fills of craft beer on draft. 2245 Nursery Rd., Clearwater. (727) 532-1972. 1933pub.com Bay Cannon Beer Company & Guava Grill Takeout and delivery. Full menu available. Beer delivery available statewide. 2106 W. Main St., Tampa. 813-251-4553. baycannon.com 3 Daughters Brewing Buy one six pack, get one free. Plus, 3D is using their resources to make hand sanitizer with first priority going to hospitals and first responders. If you know of a place in need, reach out. 222 22nd St. S., St. Petersburg. 727-495-6002. 3dbrewing.com 7th Sun Seminole Heights and Dunedin locations accepting to-go sales from 3 p.m. until sunset. No cash allowed, and please follow each locations specific sanitary procedures. 7thsun.com Anclote Brew Takeout. Craft beers on tap and in cans and bottle, plus gourmet grilled cheese sandwiches. Rent a growler to take home your favorite craft beer for a $12 deposit. Discounts on build-your-own six packs available. $25 gift certificates for $20 to use after May 13, 2020. Curbside pickup available. 735 Dodecanese Blvd., 50, Tarpon Springs. 727-940-2503. anclotebrew. com Book + Bottle The wine and book lounge is willing to ship, or meet customers at the door with orders. 17 6th St. N,, St. Petersburg. 727-240-7448. bookandbottlestpete.com BRU Florida Growler Bar Offering plastic (disposable/ recyclable) 32-ounce growlers of Florida craft beer, cider, hard seltzer, kombucha and cold brew coffee. The concept is also waiving delivery charges around Tampa. Check Bru’s Facebook for more information. 8729 Gunn Hwy., Odessa. 813-328-4721. BRU Florida Growler Bar on Facebook Cage Brewery Takeout. Any size growler filled or refilled. 2 p.m. to 8 p.m. Monday through Thursday. 12 p.m. to 8 p.m. Friday through Sunday. 2001 1st Ave. S., St. Petersburg. 727201-4278. cagebrewing.com Cigar City Brewing The Spruce Street tasting room in Tampa’s Carver City neighborhood is open and serving to-go beer and food from 12 p.m.-8 p.m. Orders and payment may be taken over the phone and in-person. No growler or crowler fills. 3924 W. Spruce St., Tampa. 813348-6363. cigarcitybrewing.com Coppertail Brewing Co. Takeout. Full menu available: wings, flatbreads, sandwiches, salads and more. All beer in the cooler can be taken home. Filling new growlers and crowlers. 11

DRINKS

RED ALERT: Mary Johnson at Red Star Rock Bar is santized and ready to sling drinks in Seminole Heights.

a.m. to 7 p.m. 7 days. To go orders can be placed online or over the phone. Curbside pickup and contactless delivery available. 2601 E. 2nd Ave, Tampa. 813-450-1781. coppertailbrewing.com Hidden Springs Ale Works Tampa Heights’ finest brewery staff is still holding it down, slinging tall boys, bottles and crowlers to go. Online ordering available. They’ve even teamed up with some very, very far away friends—Weymouth, Massachusetts’ Vitamin Sea Brewery—to come up with a long distance beer collaboration: the S P A R K L I N G I S O L A T I O N double IPA, which should be available in the coming weeks. Did we mention tipping well? 1631 N. Franklin St., Tampa. hiddenspringsaleworks.com LateStart Brewing The brewery inside Channelside’s Pour House offers growler fills, with a menu that’s constantly changing. 1208 E. Kennedy Blvd No. 112, Tampa. 813-402-2923.

latestartbrewing.com Rock Brothers Brewing Co. Get this: An anonymous donor has pledged a $10,000 match donation to the U.S. Bartenders Guild Emergency Assistance fund for every dollar spent in this Ybor City tasting room. There are gift card specials, rare whiskeys, canned beer to go, and Aperol Spritz and Moscow Mule full bottle package kits available. Open by appointment only for pickup or delivery from 12 to 5 p.m. daily (except Sunday). Message on Facebook to place an order. 1901 N. 15th St., Tampa. 813-241-0110. rockbrothersbrewing.com TBBCo Pretty much everything—from beer to lunch, dinner and dessert—is available from the long-running Bay area brewery staple with locations in Ybor City and Westchase. 813-247-1422 tbbc.beer

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 25

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28 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

MOVIES

THEATER

ART

CULTURE

Pod save your sanity

Tampa Bay podcasts for your new life under quarantine.

odcasts were a big part of our lives before the coronavirus kept us from going to work and the gym, and their presence in our daily routine probably hasn’t changed now that we’re all sequestered to our homes. And while you’re probably subscribed to all your favorite podcasts made by folks who don’t call Tampa Bay home, there are plenty produced right here to keep you company, too. These are just a few worth checking out, and there’s an even more expansive list of them via cltampa.com/arts. We’ll publish part two in print next week. Did we miss your podcast? Tell us more about it by emailing rroa@cltampa.com. 10K Dollar Day You’ll never live out your Instagram vacation fantasies, and neither will best friends and one-time starving artists Alison Burns and Lulu Picart, who use their comedy podcast to plan imaginary vacations where they spend $10,000 a day in hilarious fashion. Someone get these ladies a travel sponsor and camera crew. 10kdollarday.com Angry Grrrl Music of the Indie Rock Persuasion When Anne Schipper, a member of Tampa punk band Nervous Girls, says a podcast “introduces me to new bands that I love,” you pay attention. That’s why we’ve tuned to “Angry Grrrl Music of the Indie Rock Persuasion,” which features interviews with musicians and others across the indie, punk and emo scene. Host Amanda Starling had Ohio outfit Snarls on the show before the release of its new album, Burst, which is one of the year’s best. angrygrrrlmusic.com Barely Legal Attorney Josh Sheridan—whose Tampa Heights office has an homage to Elliott Smith’s Figure 8 album painted on the side of it—regularly sits down with a wide swath of local musicians, artists, comedians, lawyers and business people for candid chats that range from casual get-to-know-yous to in-depth talks. Barely Legal Podcast on Facebook #BlockMeBack The name of this one is apropos. Hosts trod through controversial topics and pitch unfiltered, unabashedly brash takes on everything from racial injustice to sports. Not for the fainthearted, and certainly not for the P.C. police either. #BLOCKMEBACK on Apple Podcasts Block Party Tampa Bay Lightning defenseman Dan Girardi and 102.5-FM alum Seth Kushner have an amazing Bolts-centric podcast that gets killer guests be they Hall of Fame faces of the

franchise (Martin St. Louis, Phil Esposito) or behind the scenes figures (Lightning Radio’s play-by-play man Dave Mishkin and the networks’s analyst Caley Chelios). A must for any Lightning fan. nhl.com/lightning Cannon Fire Hosts Rhett Matthew and Evan Wanish are the voices of fans who’ve lived and died with the Bucs since the creamsicle days. There are already more than 100 episodes in the book, and there’s a lot to talk about for the next two years as Tampa turns into Tom’s town. @cannonfirepod on Twitter Cigar City Radio CL’s been a fan of this podcast since 2016 when it launched out of Blind Tiger in Ybor City. Hosts Randy Ojeda and Jason Solanes are just as invested in the music scene as CL’s been for the last 30 years, and it’s cool to hear the boys travel the Bay area interviewing both locals and national acts passing through. cigarcitymanagement.com The Desmond Foster Child Podcast There’s a healthy arts scene bubbling underground in Tampa, and this podcast is tapped into it. Driven by its host, Mr. Foster Child, each of the more than 40 episodes—featuring guests like artist Fary “Junkyrd” Charles—feel like you’re eavesdropping on a conversation between the cool kids at the bar where all the best ideas are born. The Desmond Foster Child Podcast on Apple Podcasts Beauty & The ‘Burg Podcast For more than half a decade, Cindy Stovall has sat down with members of St. Petersburg’s creative class to talk about what makes them tick and why they love The ‘Burg. No one’s exempt, and Stovall does a good job connecting with her guests whether they’re musicians, visual artists, dancers or actors. Beauty & The ‘Burg Podcast on Facebook Flohio Radio If listeners want a one-stop shop where they can tap into multiple aspects of the underground hip-hop, poetry and art scenes, then they should visit Flohio Radio, which is home to close to a dozen shows including Waves of the Bay, Jus Chillin, Tuth Radio, Diamond Vibes and more. Flohio Radio on Facebook House Of I Frontman Daniel Caballero and drummer Elizabeth Piedrahita fly under the banner of their Tampa indie-rock band House Of I as they settle into long chats with figures in the Tampa Bay original music scene. Caballero likes to say that he’s shy by nature, but his

PODCASTS

AMANDA STARLING

By Ray Roa

A STARLING IS BORN: Amanda Starling's “Angry Grrrl Music of the Indie Rock Persuasion” is a must-listen for Bay area rock music fans. inquisitiveness is one of the best parts of the show. House of I on YouTube How To Die Alone The comedy podcast’s tagline says a lot (“A podcast for the broken person inside all of us. If you’ve ever wondered how to find delight in oblivion, wonder no more”), and tuning into the more than 100 episodes lands you in a room with hosts Stephen Henry, David Wayne and Matt Williams who aren’t holding their tongues about any topic. @htdapodcast on Twitter Loud Fast Shitty Every Monday, Bob Noxious and Erawk present an episode of news, reviews and interviews all devoted to the religion that is punk-rock. Locals like Dead Cat Lounge, Abortion Twins and Twisty Chris get a lot of shine, but recent ‘sodes also find Noxious

chatting it up with out-of-town bands like Philadelphia’s Riverside Odds. Loud, Fast and Sh*tty Radio Show on Facebook MidPoint from WMNF News The underlying thing beneath a post about podcasts is that radio has—and always will be—there for listeners, including those without access to podcasts, especially in times of crisis. But community radio station WMNF is there for the rest of us who have internet thanks to a dozen of its shows, which are available wherever you stream podcasts. Midpoint, which airs five times a week on 88.5-FM, is a good place to start especially since hosts from the ‘MNF news department always ask tough questions about topics like affordable housing, the use of slurs by city council people and more. wmnf.org

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 29

Wave of relief

More than $55,000 is on the way to over 100 Pinellas artists. By Ray Roa

ore than 100 Pinellas County artists were set to receive over $55,000 in emergency funds last week. That’s according to a release from Creative Pinellas, which worked with community partners like St. Petersburg Arts Alliance to create the Pinellas Arts Community Relief Fund. The fund aims to “provide immediate financial relief for artists, arts businesses and arts organizations affected by the Covid-19 emergency.” “The first wave of funds will be released to artists within the next week with additional funds to be distributed a few days later,” the April 8 release said. Dugan Cooley, CEO of the Pinellas Community Foundation, said that more than 300 applicants responded when applications for the fund opened on March 31. The release adds that applications are reviewed and evaluated by a volunteer advisory committee “using a common set of guidelines for a fair-minded process.” Grants are being awarded based on demonstrable need, according to the release, and the most vulnerable are receiving funding first. Applications for the Pinellas Arts Community Relief Fund are temporarily closed as the current applications are reviewed and available funds are distributed. John Collins, Executive Director of the St. Petersburg Arts Alliance told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the list of the first recipients is not public. “The artists have to respond first with some very brief paperwork,” Collins explained. “So that would be premature.” “The need is clearly great, and we are moving as quickly as possible in order to get the funds

into the hands of the people who need them,” Cooley, who is managing the Arts Community Relief Fund, said. “We started with the artists first and have worked our way through that. Over the next few days, we will be focusing on arts businesses and organizations, and getting to them as quickly as possible as well.” In less than two weeks since its debut, the fund has already collected $110,000 in donations from groups like the Gobioff Foundation and the Milkey Family Foundation. “We are seeing donations from artists and supporters of all kinds. It is truly uplifting in all this time of challenge, to see the power of our community coming together,” Cooley added. “We were happy to provide management and to be an early contributor to this fund. Our board of governors is very aware of the need to support the arts in this community, knowing artists contribute greatly to our quality of life but often may be living on the margins.” To qualify for funds, the artists, arts organizations and small creative businesses simply need to demonstrate specific, current, and immediate financial need. For individual artists, this may include rent, utilities, food, healthcare and other basic needs. Organization and business needs may take the form of rent, payroll, employee healthcare, or other essential operating expenses. Support from donors, philanthropists and foundations could reopen the fund to new applicants. Visit pinellascf.org to contribute or get more information.

“We are moving as quickly as possible.”

LOCAL ART

CITYOFSTPETE/FLICKR

SEEING RED: Artists already lived on the margins, financially, so every little bit helps right now.

30 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

Fuel a family

Small businesses need your help and are helping others.

safer-at-home is the reality for so many of us, but

the table to provide for their children and be able to

for now, here are the businesses still helping you

transport their child to and from the many doctors

get the shit you need to live and entertain your-

appointments while taking extra precautions for their

self as we approach a month of life under the shadow

immunocompromised child. Make an immediate dif-

of the coronavirus pandemic. Did we miss your busi-

ference in the life of a child battling cancer while also

ness? Let us know by submitting your info at cltampa.

supporting businesses by purchasing a virtual gift

com/emergencylistings.

card to your favorite restaurant or gas station and in

AGoldPhoto Pet Photography 2020 has seen a lot of

turn, the Children’s Cancer Center will fuel a family

cancellations and postponements, but love, emotion

in need. All virtual gift can be sent to our Programs

and philanthropy are here to stay. That’s why this pet

and Family Services Coordinator, Ashley Myers, at

photography company has launched a Safer at Home

amyer@childrenscancercenter.org

Portrait Project in Tampa, helping locals capture their

City Bike Tampa Downtown Tampa full-service bike

family’s love and emotion in their very own front yard

shop is in drive-thru mode and still building new

or front porch. In order to sign up, they’re asking for a

bikes. 208 E. Cass St., Tampa. 813-225-1777. citybik-

donation to be made of at least $50 to Humane Society

etampa.com

of Tampa Bay. agoldphoto.com

The Dalí The downtown St. Petersburg museum

Ben Franklin Plumbing & Scott’s One Hour Air

remains closed, but has opened up a digital portal

Conditioning The two companies have teamed up to

that allows users to visit virtually. thedali.org

spread a little joy right now. Italy is singing from their

The Florida Aquarium Temporarily closed, but offer-

balconies, America can display a light of hope for all to

ing daily Facebook Live content so you can SEA what

see by putting up their Christmas Lights and they’ll

they’re up to. flaquarium.org/sea-span

even send a team of technicians to your home to put up

Forgot or Knot Assisting with food delivery, supply

your lights free of charge. Plus, they’re hosting a con-

delivery and products to small businesses in Tampa

test, Light Of Hope Challenge, by sending a picture of

at no cost to at-risk communities during the COVID-

your lights through their company websites. The house

19 pandemic. Option to personalize video messages if

with the best light display will win a free air or water

you’re sending gifts or food. 813-325-6266. forgotor-

purification system and will be featured in upcoming

knot.com

TV commercials and billboards. Enter through May

Friends of Strays Waiving all adoption fees. All

27. benfranklinflorida.com, onehourscotts.com

adoptable dogs and cats are all spayed and neutered,

Black Radish V.M. Ybor’s new vegan grocery store

up-to-date on vaccines, and microchipped. Just 10

takes online orders, then stashes them in a locker that only you can open (yes, the cold items are

RETAIL

kept in a thermal bag with

visitors will be allowed in the building at once.

CHILDRENS CANCER CENTER

By Alexis Chamberlain

CANCER DOESN’T QUIT: Some Bay area families need help to keep treating cancer in their littles ones.

2911 47th Ave N., St. Petersburg. 727-522-6566.

offering curbside shopping and pickup, plus same-day

producing online content for members and the public,

friendsofstrays.org

delivery throughout Hillsborough County on orders

including virtual tours of our exhibitions, follow-along

ice packs). 2923 N. 12th St., Ybor City. 813-467-6496.

Grill & Provisions Co. One-stop grill pro shop and Big

over $35. Full service grooming and self dog wash

art-making activities, and live-streamed events, post-

blackradishgrocer.com

Green Egg Platinum Dealer. Free delivery on all pur-

stations closed until further notice. 1120 E. Kennedy

ing alongside other museums nationwide under the

The Body Electric Yoga Company Brick and mortar

chases, 20% of all charcoal, pellets, spices, rubs, and

Blvd., Tampa. 813-602-1750. themodernpaws.com

hashtag #MuseumFromHome. tampamuseum.org

is closed, but offering several classes a day free live

sauces. Takeout available for Off the Egg lunch and

My Appliance Guy In-home residential appliance repair.

Tombolo Books Sales floor temporarily closed, but

streamed on Facebook. Schedule available online or

BBQ catering and family packs that can be ordered

Normal operating hours, but limiting calls to three

bringing books to your doorstep with no-contact deliv-

on the app. 3015 7th St. N., St. Petersburg. 727-490-

ahead and delivered. 3501 N. Armenia Ave., Tampa.

to four a day to minimize the exposure and spread of

ery in St. Pete so you can stay home, stay safe, and

9361. thebodyelectricyoga.com

813-879-4647. grillandprovisions.com

the virus. 813-808-7533. myapplianceguyrepairs.com

keep reading. Order online for shipments via USPS

Busch Gardens Tampa Bay The theme park and zoo

Health Mutt Virtual shopping available for curbside

New Identities Hair Studio Redken products available

and UPS. tombolobooks.com

is closed during the pandemic, but bringing turn-

pickup. To place a curbside order, text 813-467-6529

for purchase, plus root touchup kits and root spray. All

University Area CDC University Area CDC facilities

key, engaging activities for kids K-12 to your home.

or shop online. 6116 N Central Ave., Tampa. 813-231-

products are buy two, get one free. Order online, open

and properties are closed through April 14, it’s teamed

Materials can also be accessed by going directly to

3137. tampahealthmutt.com

Fridays 12 p.m. to 3 p.m. for curbside pickup at Tampa

up with Prodigy® Cultural Arts Program instructors

SeaWorld.org, or through the park’s portal at Busch

James Museum The St. Petersburg museum of west-

Palms and Riverview locations. newidentitiessalon.com

to develop video tutorials on the following topics: life

Gardens Tampa Bay Education. seaworld.com

ern and wildlife art is closed during the pandemic,

Prodigy Cultural Arts A University Area CDC

skills, painting, drawing, dancing, bass guitar, the

CAMP Tampa Choose your own adventure (Pilates,

but it is curating a Tuesday interactive session called

(Community Development Corporation) program,

shaker and more. Videos are added weekly along with

HIIT, Yoga) at Camp (stylized “CAMP”), no matter

“The James Museum from Home.” jamesmuseum.org

Prodigy Cultural Arts is now offering free online

“Get Moving!” exercise videos. uacdc.org/prodigyonline

where you are. The South Tampa studio is offering

Jim Chambers Music Box The show goes on at this

tutorials. Instructors have developed video tutorials

VKNG ROW Fitness studio and indoor rowing facility.

CAMP2GO, an effort to support staff during this time,

Tampa music school where lesions and jam sessions

on the following topics: life skills, painting, drawing,

Currently closed until regulations from CDC recom-

bringing you online workout classes with new classes

have moved online. jcmusicbox.com

dancing, bass guitar, the shaker and more. uacdc.

mend reopening. Offering free challenges and workouts

posted every Monday night. Watch from anywhere for

Kalamazoo Olive Company Small, locally owned inde-

org/prodigyonline

through social media platforms. 701 W Platt St., Tampa.

$35/month. camptampa2go.com

pendent specialty grocery retail shop, selling imported

Tampa Bay History Center Temporarily closed, but

813-260-0174. vkng-row.com

Children’s Cancer Center The Children’s Cancer Center

olive oils and balsamic vinegars. 1008 Central Ave..,

featuring online content via Facebook and Instagram.

—

has launched a #FuelingFamilies campaign, help-

St. Petersburg. 727-258-4925. kalamazooolive.com

tampabayhistorycenter.org

Did we miss your business? Let us know by submitting

ing ensure families have gas in the car and food on

The Modern Paws Locally-owned natural pet market

Tampa Museum of Art Temporarily closed, but will be

your info at cltampa.com/emergencylistings

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 31

The power of LIKE

LIKE CREATIVE LOAFING TAMPA ON FACEBOOK

Daily updates, news, photos, concerts, movies, restaurants and more! 32 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

PROFILES

MUSIC WEEK

End of State

Floridian Social Club’s operating principle on the future of 687 Central Ave. By Ray Roa

t’s hard to even think about the return of live music during life under a stay-at-home order, but downtown St. Petersburg’s State Theatre got a new name last Monday. The Floridian Social Club introduced itself to Tampa Bay on April 6 in the form of an online sizzle reel. The clip traces 687 Central Ave.’s history as a bank, movie theater, historic site, and then as a concert venue that’s being reborn with a new moniker. All of it is happening under the guidance of Kevin Chadwick, a real estate lifer who by day is the Owner and Operating Principle of Keller Williams franchises in the Tampa Bay area. His 35-year role in the local real estate industry is what led Chadwick—also the 59-year-old Operating Principle of Floridian Social Club—to State. In June 2018, a family trust run by Chadwick purchased State Theatre for $2.1 million after previous owners shut it down. The sale came less than a year after fire code violations and inspections at State led to a downsized crowd capacity, which the fire marshal eventually set at 600 in February 2018. In a phone call with Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, Chadwick cleared the air and said that the Floridian Social Club—whose name is an homage to the the past and future of the historic local landmark—is an 800-capacity venue that would only have 200 seats, which means there will most definitely be general admission, standing room only options for concerts. Chadwick also spoke to the Floridian Social Club’s website, which said that Tuesdays through Thursdays would be “Lounge Nights” while concerts would happen on Friday and Saturday. That mix of concerts and lounge nights aims to activate the space for more than just shows, but that doesn’t mean there can’t be a concert there on a Tuesday. “Priority events is our concerts. So, if one of our if one of our promoters has a band, an event, it could be a Monday night, even a night where we’re closed—any night of the week,” Chadwick said. “Our concert schedule takes precedence over everything.”

Chadwick wouldn’t tell CL which promoter he’s been talking to about booking concerts, but even that talent buyer had to be reassured that the venue was committed to music. “He goes, ‘You know Kevin, I was just looking at the rollout and it kind of leads me to believe you’re only gonna have concerts during weekends.’” To that, Chadwick reiterated that, “Live music is the priority of who we are, at the Floridian Social Club.” “Live music has precedence over any other event—promoters already know this. They have carte blanche and full control over our schedule. To me, music comes first,” Chadwick told CL. “Then our clubs and weekends come second. And then of course, our lounge nights and special events come third.” Local musicians will naturally be part of that conversation—and part of those weeknights and even weekends when there isn’t a national on the stage. The venue has already thrown its hat into the Bay area scene by hosting live streams from homegrown talents who’ve lost gigs due to the coronavirus. But until a calendar does actually start to coalesce, it’s hard to see exactly what kind of music Floridian Social Club will host. When asked about which acts might play his venue, Chadwick said the hierarchy starts with recognized recognizable national bands. “And then of course the next step is very much local. We’ve got incredible talent here. We will be featuring great local bands and regional bands every other night, if we can,” Chadwick added. Those bands will play on a state-ofthe-art sound system installed by industry leader ESI. The sound is just part of a big renovation that also brings State Theatre’s center bar—where service would only happen in the lobby—into both the lobby and performance theater. Chadwick said that having to leave a show to get a drink from the bar was always the biggest pain in the ass. Sitting parlors for 15-20 people are also in the plans. Floridian Social Club even got rid of that weird change in elevation that used to trip people up when moving from the lobby towards the theater. And at the end of the day, Chadwick simply wants the Floridian Social Club to be a room that everyone—from fans, to artists to crew—wants to visit again. “The biggest compliment that every band member can pay our team, to what we’re creating, is to high-five us on the way out the back door after they’re done, saying, “That was the most fun event, we’ve been able to do in a very

INTERVIEW

CITYOFSTPETE/FLICKR

REVIEWS

FADING OUT: The State Theatre is now the Floridian Social Club. long time,’” Chadwick said. “It’s not so easy to pull that off because there’s a lot of competition out there.” It’s safe to say that the concert industry at large—which was decimated by the coronavirus—is still trying to figure out when it might be safe to have 800-plus-capacity concerts, but No Clubs’ Tony Rifugiato told CL that he hopes he can one day book shows at the Floridian Social Club. Rifugiato, who was part owner of the State Theatre, was in contact with Chadwick before and during renovations, but he’s yet to reconnect as the venue inches closer to opening. Floridian Social Club’s announcement video seemed to skip over the history that independent promoters like Rifugiato built there, which understandably left two generations of music fans who grew up watching metal, rock, folk and rap shows there feeling left out. When asked about it, Chadwick mentioned that the perspective was interesting because no one he’d

talked to about it had gone down that road yet. Chadwick said he also grew up around the theater, and he remembers the movies from early on, plus the concerts. But he also remembers how the “big beautiful old historic building that is was only open if there was an event or concert.” Chadwick said that Central Avenue has gone through a renaissance. State was only open when there was a show. The audience downtown St. Petersburg has changed. “No Clubs and Tony—I love those guys. They filled in a gap of history that I think was really important,” Chadwick said. “And at the same time. I don’t think that one dimensional perspective is relevant today.” “State Theatre didn’t have an audience for every day,” Chadwick said. “We are reinventing the theater to be everything it was—and, and plus, plus, plus. So, we are still going to be very relevant on the music scene. That is who we are.”

“Our concert schedule takes precedence over everything.”

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 33

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BIEB-FUND: If you bought ticket to see Justin Bieber’s canceled Tampa show on StubHub, then you’re allowed a refund.

Stub hubub

Unlike other states, Florida StubHub buyers can get refunds for canceled or postponed events. By Jerilyn Jordan

s the great Cat Stevens once wrote, “the first cut is the deepest.” For many, the first cut suffered may have been the ongoing wave of concert and event postponements and cancellations across the globe due to the coronavirus pandemic, forcing the event industry at large to press pause indefinitely. Last month, promoter giants Live Nation and AEG grounded all tours amid the crisis. Well, the second cut doesn’t feel too good either, especially for those who may have purchased tickets through shady ticketexchange and resale site StubHub. StubHub, which cut its staff by two-thirds, also reversed its refund policy. Normally, a canceled event equaled a full and automatic refund. But recently, StubHub began offering buyers the option of receiving a full refund for a canceled event or a voucher, which is valued at 120% of their order to be applied for a future purchase on the site. This is no longer the case unless buyers and/or canceled events are located in one of 14 states that enforce consumer/refund laws, in which case the buyer may be entitled to a refund. Florida, fortunately, is one of those states. Kate Brinks, Senior Director, Global Communications & Social Media at StubHub, told CL sibling paper Orlando Weekly that “customers should contact StubHub customer support if their event is canceled.” So if you went to StubHub to buy tickets for the July Justin Bieber concert at Amalie Arena,

then you can get your money back. “We have a situation right now where we had over 20,000 events canceled, basically at the same time. In addition to our buyers, we also have a million sellers on our platform, all of whom are trying to figure out how they’re going to get recouped from the original seller — the venue, the team, the artist — and the timing delays are going to be significant,” StubHub president Sukhinder Singh Cassidy told Axios. “In normal times, we would take the risk of giving refunds to buyers before recouping the same refund from the seller,” Sukinder said. “At regular volume, we can afford to take that risk. But these are unprecedented times.” With most sporting events in the air as well, postponed games pose their own set of frustrations for ticket buyers, who under this new policy are unable to redeem the coupon option from StubHub—meaning they have to either wait until the event is canceled, at which point the voucher kicks in, resell the ticket, or apply the ticket to the event’s new date. In February, StubHub was acquired by ticketing rival Viagogo after leveraging a $4 million buyout. Gary Alder, executive director of the National Association of Ticket Brokers, told Billboard that he has garnered support to try and get Congress to include ticketing companies in the same bailout package for airlines and hotel hospitality, describing the services they provide as “valuable” and “essential.”

CONCERT NEWS

“StubHub cut staff by twothirds and reversed its refund policy.”

Where the vinyl is: a list of Bay area record stores

It’s no secret that locally-owned and operated businesses are taking a hit from coronavirus closures and curfews. Some Tampa Bay record stores have adapted by offering curbside pickup, free shipping and private shopping during the COVID-19 pandemic. Stock up on some quarantine vinyl, and spend that money you were saving for the now postponed Record Store Day 2020. Just make sure to call ahead of time to see what’s up at the shop. —Kyla Fields ArtPool Records (2030 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-433-5195, artpoolrules. com

Daddy Kool Records (2430 Terminal Dr. S., Side B, St. Petersburg) 727-822-5665, daddykool.com

Kingfish Records (Main Store) (26024-B US Highway 19 N., Clearwater) 727-351-5177, kingfishrecords.com

Sound Exchange Tampa (14246 N. Nebraska Ave., Tampa) 813-978-9316, soundexchangetampabay.com

Asylum Sights and Sounds (6566 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-384-1221

Disc Exchange (6712 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-343-5845, thediscexchange. com

Kingfish Records (Flea Market) (180 Race Track Rd., Tampa) 727-455-9923, kingfishrecords.com

Sound Exchange Pinellas Park (66th Street N and 86th Avenue N., Pinellas Park) 727-545-0042, soundexchangetampabay.com

Dunedin Records & Audio (757 Main St., Dunedin) 727-423-4108, dunedinrecords.com

Microgroove (906 N. Florida Ave., Tampa) 813-667-7089, microgroovetampa.co

St. Pete Records (6648 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-490-8861, stpeterecords.com

Mojo Books & Records (2540 E. Fowler Ave., Tampa) 813-971-9717, mojotampa.com

Steelworker Records (708 W. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., Tampa) 813-666-4933, steelworkerrecords.com

Bananas Records (2887 22nd Ave N., St. Petersburg) 727-327-4616 ext. 1, bananasrecords.com

Bananas Records Warehouse (2226 16th Dustin’s Vinyl Shop (180 Race Track Rd., Ave. N., St. Petersburg) 727 327-4616 ext. 2, Booth F25 W, Oldsmar) 727-678-6829, bananasrecords.com facebook.com/pg/dustinsvinylshop Blue Moon Antiques, Books & Music Green Shift Music & Comics (5713 N. (1413 Cleveland St., Clearwater) 727-443-7444 Nebraska Ave., Tampa) 813-238-4177, greenshiftmusicandcomics.com The Clearwater Record Shop (1610 N. Hercules Ave., Clearwater) 727-755-1201, Hello Darlin’ Records (Roving VW Camper) clearwaterrecordshow.com 727-479-6783, hellodarlinrecords.com

Patrick’s Book and Record Store (15215 US Hwy.19 C, Hudson) 727-868-3168, patricksbooksandre.wixsite.com/patricks Planet Retro Records (226 Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. St. N., St. Petersburg) 727-2187434, planetretrorecords.com

Unique Music & Collectables (123 Main St., Dunedin) 727-240-0757 Vintage Vinyl (38874 U.S. 19 N., Tarpon Springs) 727-940-8301, vintagevinyl.biz

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 35

Aries The ram.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Aries artist Vincent van Gogh got started on his life’s work relatively late. At ages 25 and 26 he made failed attempts to train as a pastor and serve as a missionary. He didn’t launch his art career in earnest until he was 27. During the next ten years, he created 860 paintings —an average of 1.7 every week—as well as over 1,200 additional works of art. For comparison, the prolific painter Salvador Dali made 1,500 paintings in 61 years. During the coming twelve months, Aries, you could achieve a van Gogh-like level of productiveness in your own chosen field—especially if you lay the foundations now, during our stay-at-home phase.

strategies during the coming weeks. It won’t be a time when you should force yourself to endure boring, meaningless, and unproductive tasks.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I hope that during the SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Sagittarian coronavirus crisis you have been entertaining sculptor and architect Gian Lorenzo Bernini wild truths and pondering the liberations you (1596–1680) was a prodigious, inventive crewill initiate when the emergency has passed. ator. One scholar wrote, “What Shakespeare I trust you have been pushing your imagina- is to drama, Bernini may be to sculpture.” He tion beyond its borders and wandering into the designed and built public squares, fountains, and buildings, many in nooks and crannies of your psyche that you Rome, which embodied were previously hesihis great skills as both tant to explore. Am I sculptor and architect. correct in my assumpUnlike many brilliant By Rob Brezsny tions, Leo? Have you artists alive today,

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

been wandering outside your comfort zone and discovering clues about how, when things return to normal, you can add spice and flair to your rhythm?

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Most authors do their writing while sitting on chairs in front of desks. But long before there were standing desks, poet Rainer Maria Rilke and children’s author Lewis Carroll wrote their books while standing up. Novelist Henry James had eight desks, but typically paced between them as he dictated his thoughts to a secretary. And then there have been weirdoes like poet Robert Lowell and novelist Truman Capote. They attended to their craft as they lay in their bed. I suggest you draw inspiration from those two in the coming weeks. It’ll be a favorable time to accomplish masterpieces of work and play while in the prone position.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I like this quote by the author Jake Remington: “Fate whispers to the warrior, ‘You cannot withstand the storm.’ The warrior whispers back, ‘I am the storm.’” Although this passage is more melodramatic than necessary for your needs in the coming weeks, I think it might be good medicine that will help you prevail over the turbulence of the coronavirus crisis. Getting yourself into a storm-like mood could provide you with the personal power necessary to be unflappable and authoritative. You should also remember that a storm is not inherently bad. It may be akin to a catharsis or orgasm that relieves the tension and clears the air.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): While sleeping, most of us have over a thousand dreams every year. Many are hard to remember and not worth remembering. But a beloved few can be lifechangers. They have the potential to trigger epiphanies that transform our destinies for the better. In my astrological opinion, you are now in a phase when such dreams are more likely than usual. That’s why I invite you to keep a pen and notebook by your bed so as to capture them. For inspiration, read this testimony from Jasper Johns, whom some call America’s “foremost living artist”: “One night I dreamed that I painted a large American flag, and the next morning I got up and I went out and bought the materials to begin it.” (Painting flags ultimately became one of Johns’ specialties.)

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Libran rapper and activist Talib Kweli says, “You have to know when to be arrogant. You have to know when to be humble. You have to know when to be hard and you have to know when to be soft.” You Librans tend to be skilled in this artful approach to life: activating and applying the appropriate attitude as is necessary for each new situation. And I’m happy to report that your capacity for having just the right touch at the right time will be a crucial asset in the coming weeks. Trust your intuition to guide you through every subtle shift of emphasis.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Ford Madox Ford (1873–1939) was a renowned author who wrote “The Good Soldier,” a novel that has been called “one of the 100 greatest novels of all time.” Yet another very famous author, Henry James (1843–1916), was so eager to escape hanging out with Ford that he once concealed himself behind a tree so as to not be seen. You have astrological permission to engage in comparable

36 | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | cltampa.com

is a favorable time to re-evaluate it. I’m not telling you what you should decide, only that you should think hard about it.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Scorpio artist Marie Laurencin (1883–1956) enjoyed a colorful fate. One of the few female Cubist painters, she was a prominent figure in the Parisian avantgarde. She was also the muse and romantic partner of renowned poet Guillaume Apollinaire. But there came a turning point when she abandoned her relationship with Apollinaire. “I was twenty-five and he was sleeping with all the women,” she said, “and at twenty-five you don’t stand for that, even from a poet.” Is there a comparable situation in your life, Scorpio? A role you relish but that also takes a toll? Now

Bernini was deeply religious. Every night for 40 years, he walked from his home to pay a devotional visit to the Church of the Gesù. According to my reading of the astrological factors, now would be an excellent time for you to engage in reverential rituals like those—but without leaving your home, of course. Use this social-distancing time to draw reinvigoration from holy places within you or in your memory. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): As I understand the current chapter of your life story, you have been doing the unspectacular but yeoman work of

re ch a rging your spiritual batteries. Although you may have outw a r d l y appeared to be quiet and still, you have in fact been generating and storing up concentrated reserves of inner power. Because of the coronavirus crisis, it’s not yet time to tap into those impressive reserves

and start channeling them into a series of dynamic practical actions. But it is time to formulate the practical actions you will take when the emergency has passed. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Aquarian poet Jacques Prévert offered a variation on the famous Christian supplication known as the Lord’s Prayer. The original version begins, “Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.” But Prévert’s variation says, “Our father who art in heaven: Stay there.” Being an atheist, he had no need for the help and support of a paternal deity. I understand his feeling. I tend to favor the Goddess myself. But for you Aquarians right now, even if you’re allergic to talk of a divine presence, I’ll recommend that you seek out generous and inspiring masculine influences. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you will benefit from influences that resemble good fathering. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): How skillful are you in expressing what you want? Wait. Let me back up and reformulate that. How skillful are you in knowing what you want and expressing the truth about what you want to the people who might ultimately be able to give it to you or help you get it? This is the most important question for you to meditate on in the coming weeks. If you find that you’re fuzzy about what you want or hazy about asking for what you want, correct the problems.

Quickies

think needs to do—she needs to break the fuck up with her shitty girlfriend—and then change the subject.

By Dan Savage

I am a super queer presenting female who recently accepted that I have desires for men. My partner of two years is bisexual and understands the desires, but has personally dealt with those desires via masturbation while my desires include acting. Her perspective is that the grass is greener where you water it and that my desire to act is immature, selfish, and has an unrealistic end game. What gives when you don’t feel fulfilled sexually in a monogamous relationship? —Open Or Over? Something definitely gives when a person doesn’t feel fulfilled in a monogamous relationship— sometimes it’s an ultimatum that’s given, sometimes it’s a one-time-only hall pass that’s given, sometimes it’s an agreement to open the relationship that’s given. But the relationship sometimes gives, e.g. the relationship collapses under the weight of competing and mutually exclusive needs and desires. If you want to open things up (if allowed) and she wants to keep things closed (no allowance), OOO, it’s ultimately your willpower—your commitment to honoring the commitment you’ve made—that’s likely to give. I have a close friend who’s cheating on her girlfriend. It has been going on for over a year. At first I actually supported the exploration because my friend has a really unsupportive girlfriend who has done really crappy things to her over the course of their relationship. I kept pushing for her to make a decision and use this affair as a way for her to free herself, but she is just coasting along with her girlfriend and her lover. She’s under a lot of stress and she’s turned into a major liar and it’s creeping me out. I’m considering either telling her girlfriend myself (though I promised my friend I wouldn’t) or maybe I just need to end this friendship. My friend’s double life upsets me. It’s just been going on too long. —Is My Friend An Asshole?

I’m a cis het woman who loves men and loves dicks. I love dicks so much that I fantasize about having one. Nothing brings me to orgasm more quickly or reliably than closing my eyes and imagining my own dick, or imagining myself as my partner, and what they’re feeling through their dick. I love being a woman, and I’m afraid to bring this up with any partner(s) of mine. Is this super weird? Am I secretly trans somehow? Am I overthinking this? —Perfect Minus Penis It’s not that weird, some people are trans and you could be one of them (but fantasizing about having a dick ≠ being a male), and you’re overthinking what you should be enjoying. Buy a strap-on, tell your partners about your fantasies, and enjoy having the dick the dick you can have. I wonder if you might be able to put a label on this sex act: It has to do with overstimulation, in this case of a penis (mine). After receiving a wonderful hand job, the giver kept stroking me purposefully. My penis was in a heightened, super-sensitive state. It was almost like being tickled, if you’re ticklish. I was being forcefully held down (consensually), and just as I thought I couldn’t take it anymore, I had a second amazing orgasm. I didn’t ejaculate again, it was more of a body orgasm. It came in waves and everything was warm. It was mind-blowing, spiritual, galactic, unique, and very similar to how I’ve heard women describe their orgasms. Ever hear of anything like this? Is this some sot of Japanese underground kink thing? —Witty Hilarious Overzealous Amateur

SAVAGE LOVE

If your friend—the one leading the double life— is asking you to run interference for her, if she’s asking you to lie to her girlfriend, or if she’s asked you to compromise your integrity in some way, she’s an asshole and you’re a sap; tell your friend you’re done covering for her and that you won’t be able to see her again until the deceit or the pandemic is over, whichever comes first. If the issue your friend expects you to ooze sympathy while she goes on and on about the mess she’s made of her life, IMFAA, simply refuse to discuss the mess that is her love life with her. Remind her that she already knows what you

The act you’re describing already has a name, WHOA, and an entry on Urban Dictionary: apple-polishing. Most men find the sensation of having the head of their cock worked so overwhelming that their bodies involuntarily recoil, which makes it difficult to polish someone’s apple if the “victim” isn’t restrained in some way. But it’s not painful—it’s like being tickled; indeed, the victim usually reacts with desperate laughter and gasping pleas for it to stop. (Don’t ask me how I know.) That all-over feeling of euphoria you experienced when your apple got polished was most likely a wave of endorphins—like a runner who pushes herself past her physical limits and experiences an full-body “runner’s high,” you were pushed past your physical limits, WHOA, and experienced the same sort of high. I’m a 35-year-old straight guy. I recently started seeing an amazing 34-year-old girl. We love being around each other, but during sex, neither of us can come. It’s infuriating, to say the least. She

has no trouble when she masturbates and I know I have no trouble when I masturbate, so why can’t we come together? —Can’t Understand Matter If you can come when you masturbate and she can come when she masturbates, CUM, masturbate together and you’ll be coming together. Mutual masturbation isn’t a sad consolation prize—mutual masturbation is sex and it can be great sex. And the more often you come together through mutual masturbation, CUM, the likelier it gets that you’ll be able to come together while enjoying other things. I have a weird and terrible problem. I’ve been seeing someone new, and have just discovered that I get diarrhea every time I swallow his come. Like debilitating pee poops an hour after, every time. I know the solution to the problem would be to stop swallowing, but I was wondering if you had ever heard of this before or knew why this was. —My Sad Asshole I have heard of this before, MSA, and superstar Savage Love guest expert Dr. Debby Herbenick unpacked the cause for another reader a few

years back: “Prostaglandins are substances made by the body and that the body is sensitive to. Semen contains prostaglandins—and prostaglandins can have a laxative effect on people. Related: If you’ve ever felt a little looseygoosey right before getting your period, that’s also thanks to prostaglandins (which spike just before your period, because the prostaglandins get the uterine muscles to contract, which then helps to shed the lining of the uterus, resulting in a menstrual period). So why don’t more semen swallowers find themselves running to the bathroom post-blowjob? I don’t know why most people aren’t extra-sensitive to prostaglandins, but fortunately most of us aren’t, or there would probably be a lot less swallowing in the world.” So, MSA, you’ll have to stop swallowing your boyfriend’s come or only swallow when you have immediate access to a toilet in a restroom with a powerful fan. Guest this week on savagelovecast.com: Erin Gibson. Email mail@savagelove.net. Follow @FakeDanSavage on Twitter.

cltampa.com | APRIL 16-22, 2020 | 37

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