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cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 3

PUBLISHER James Howard EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf STAFF WRITER Justin Garcia FOOD and THEATER CRITIC Jon Palmer Claridge FILM & TV CRITIC John Allman OLOF GRIND

IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Paul Catala, Brandalynn Nuñez Cepeda, Kyla Fields, Gabrielle Reeder, Dan Savage, Eric Snider

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PHOTOGRAPHERS Nicole Abbett, Dave Decker, Jon William

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EDITORIAL INTERNSanimal Molly rights Ryan, Maximilian SeaWorld in February, Steele claiming Apply the practice of keeping wild for fall via rroa@cltampa.com d dangerous. But even though public atmany SeaWorld in animal rights CREATIVE DIRECTOR Jack don’t seeFebruary, a parallel between theSpatafora kind claiming the practice of keeping wildDan Perkins, k, and the practice of displaying animals ILLUSTRATORS Joe Newton, nd dangerous. But evenOr though public Cory Robinson, Whitmore asking for too much? is itBob time for a d, many don’t see a parallel between the kind t” animals? SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES

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ck and the practice of displaying animals Anthony Carbone, Scott Zepeda s asking for too much? Or is it time for a ent” animals? MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND

Tampa has some skeletons of its own (we’re not talking about City Hall).

EVENTS DIRECTOR Alexis Quinn Chamberlain

The graves Phoebe Bridgers should visit before her Tampa show, p. 43.

Music: Tampa Bay Blues Fest ........................... 40

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND

Music Week ................................................... 42 EVENTS COORDINATOR Lauren Caplinger Music: Tampa Fest ........................... Concert review:Bay ArticBlues Monkeys ..........................40 42

EUCLID MEDIA GROUP

Music ................................................... 42 The ListWeek .......................................................... 46 CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER Andrew Zelman Concert review: Artic Monkeys .......................... CHIEF OPERATING OFFICERS42 Movie reviews ..................................................... 63

Chris Keating, Michael Wagner VP OF DIGITAL SERVICES Stacy Volhein DIGITAL OPERATIONS COORDINATOR Free Will AstrologyJaime ......................................... 64 Monzon Savage Love ...................................................... 69 TheWill List Astrology .......................................................... Free .........................................46 64

Movie ........................................................... reviews..................................................... 63 Puzzler 66

euclidmediagroup.com Savage Love ...................................................... 69 cltampa.com cldeals.com

FOOD �� 29 A&E �� 39 MUSIC ��43

EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa is a publication covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum. They do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

MUSIC WEEK �� 45

Creative Loafing Tampa is published by Tampa Weekly, LLC, 633 N Franklin St., Suite 735. Tampa, Florida, 33602.

SAVAGE LOVE �� 53

CROSSWORD �� 55

ORACLE OF YBOR �� 51

Though we managed to stop the bastard, the bitch that bore him is in heat again.

The newspaper is produced and printed on How was your Date?

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Our main number: (813) 739-4800 Letters to the editor: comments@cltampa.com Anonymous news tips: cltampabay_tips@protonmail.com Ybor Festival of the Ybor Festival of the Moving Image Moving Image A MEMBER OF: cltampa.com/arts cltampa.com/arts Follow us on

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ON THE COVER: Photographs via Adobe. Design by Jack Spatafora.

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itors ors

Jobsite’s ‘Arturo Ui’ strikes a familiar chord, p. 39.

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4 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

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/music Listen to Music Week /news More cop stuff /arts Things to do

cltampa.com/slideshows All the big concerts

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cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 5

This is one fiesta you won’t want to miss!

Thursday, May 19th, 2022 Tampa River Center

Join us for a unique opportunity to sample margaritas created by more than a dozen of the Tampa Bay area’s best mixologists and try your hand at tipsy judging as YOU help award Tampa Bay’s Ultimate Margarita! Plus, live entertainment, Mexican-inspired hors d’oeuvres, and other fun surprises.

MARGARITAWARSTAMPABAY.COM 6 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

Besito Mexican “Blackberry Kiss”

Tres Generaciones Reposado tequila, muddled blackberries, simple syrup, fresh lemon juice and orange liqueur, shaken and served with a sugar rim

Blood Brothers “Blood Brothers Margarita”

El Tesoro Reposado tequila, organic blue agave, lime juice, and water

Bogota Kitchen + Bar “The Sonoma Margarita”

Hornitos Plata tequila, Gran Gala, lime juice, agave, pinot noir, and roses

Bouzy “Spicy Cucumber Margarita”

Tres Generaciones Reposado tequila, lime, cucumber water, serrano pepper-infused agave nectar, and a Tajin rim

Cipresso at Seminole Hard Rock “Peach Margarita”

Hornitos Plata tequila, grappa, peach nectar, peach syrup, fresh lemon, and lime juice

COCKtail St Pete “El Gallo Grande”

Tres Generaciones Plata tequila, grapefruit super juice, thyme-infused agave syrup, Lo Fi Aperitifs Gentian Amaro, Fever Tree Soda Water, and a rainbow sea salt rim

Datz “Who Lives In a Pineapple?”

Tres Generaciones Anejo tequila, Ancho Reyes Verde Liqueur, pineapple-jalapeño shrub, cilantro, lime, and a spicy rim

Fresco’s Waterfront Bistro “Spicy Jalapeño Margarita”

Tres Generaciones Plata tequila, Natalie’s Margarita Mix, and fresh muddled jalapeños

Fuzzy’s Taco Shop “The Horny Habanero Margarita”

Hornitos Reposado tequila, triple sec, fresh squeezed lime juice, housemade agave, mango purée, Fuzzy’s Honey Habanero Sauce, and a Fuzzy Dust rim served with a lime wedge

Gigglewaters “Pineapple Express”

Tres Gen Anejo tequila, pineapple, citrus gomme, and Cayman Jack

HEW Parlor & Chophouse “Prohibita”

Hornitos Plata tequila, lime, agave, Amaro Tropical Liqueur by Dark Door Spirits, tajin, and charred orange

No Vacancy “Island Boi”

El Tesoro Reposado tequila, passion fruit, agave falernum, lime, tajin, and White Claw Surf Citrus Yuzu Smash

Pineiro Hospitality “Mi Alma”

Hornitos Blanco tequila, strawberry, lemongrass, watermelon, aji amarillo peppers, lime, black salt rim, and a flower garnish

Sea Dog Cantina “Spicy Mango Margarita”

El Tesoro Blanco tequila infused with habanero, coldpressed agave, fresh lime juice, Mango Reàl, house sweet and sour mix, and Rey Azul Mango

Social Roost “Lady Elote”

Tres Generaciones Reposado tequila, sweet corn, ancho chili, cilantro, agave, lime, and chili-lime salt

World of Beer “This Means War”

Tres Generaciones Plata tequila, Passoã Passion Fruit Liqueur, fresh lime, cream of coconut, ginger, guava and salt rim

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A candid talk with Times bosses, comedy and charity among things to do. By Ray Roa and Colin Wolf

ast week, the Tampa Bay Times took home its 14th Pulitzer Prize for its “Poisoned” investigation into Tampa Bay’s Gopher Resource lead smelter. For their efforts, reporters Corey G. Johnson (who’s leaving the Times for ProPublica) Rebecca Woolington and Eli Murray got hurrahs from journalism insiders, and some prize money since winners from the 15 journalism categories are each awarded $15,000. Outgoing Times Chairman Paul Tash added that, “We do this difficult work to make a difference here at home, but it’s thrilling that our peers judge it among the finest journalism in America.” This Friday, Tash—making his first joint appearance with Conan Gallaty who’ll succeed him as chairman this summer— is supposed to talk candidly about whether or not Pulitzers can boost the bottom line for Tampa’s vaunted paper of record. “Founded more than a century ago as the weekly West Hillsborough Times, it grew to be the best-selling daily newspaper in the southeast but now publishes only twice a week with a newsroom less than half the size it once was,” Tampa Tiger Bay Club wrote in a release about its upcoming chat with Tash and Gallaty. Only members of the nonpartisan political group may ask questions at the talk, but the last few sessions have been lively and newsmaking. Tampa Tiger Bay Club: Future of the Tampa Bay Times. Friday, May 20, 11:15 a.m. (program begins at noon). $25-$35. The Cuban Club. Cuban Club, 2010 N Avenida Republica de Cuba, Ybor City. tigerbayclub.com

Spring for equality After two years off, Creative Clay’s annual spring arts fundraiser is back in-person, complete with live music from member artists, gourmet food, a 50-bottle wine pull, drawings and silent auction. Proceeds benefit the nonprofit which helps people with disabilities achieve full and inclusive lives by providing expressive, educational and vocational experiences in the arts. Spring For The Arts: Equality Through Art: Friday, May 20. 6 p.m. $125 & up. Nova 535, 535 Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. St. N, St. Petersburg. creativeclay.org Earmuffs Grammy-nominated comedian Bill Burr hasn’t been shy about sharing his opinions on Tampa, and Florida for that matter, and you’ll get to hear those thoughts and more during his “Slight Return” tour. Over the past few months Burr has gone on a few epic rants regarding the Sunshine State. Most recently, he referred to Gov. Ron DeSantis as a “fucking piece of shit,” for questioning doctors and instead doing “what his fanbase wants him to do.” Also, while speaking on his podcast, he called Tampa the “city time forgot,” and sincerely hoped the Lightning would win back-to-back Stanley Cups because “we absolutely need it.” “You go to Tampa. Oh, Jesus Christ. I mean, it’s just, I don’t know what it is down there. It’s just a city that time forgot, right?,” said Burr. “Everybody’s down there like, you walk around Tampa and it’s like, is everybody on their way to a cookout?” Bill Burr: Slight Return. Friday, May 20. 8 p.m $54 & up. MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, 4802 U.S. Hwy-301, Tampa. billburr.com

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cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 9

Dick laws

Photos by Dave Decker and Nick Cardello

undreds of Tampa abortion advocates joined multiple cities around the country last Saturday, holding a massive “Bans off our Bodies” rally at downtown’s Joe Chillura Courthouse Square. The rally followed reports of a leaked draft of a U.S. Supreme Court opinion that would overturn Roe vs. Wade, and effectively end the constitutional right to have an abortion, as well as a failed attempt by the U.S. Senate to legalize abortions on a national scale. According to Creative Loafing Tampa Bay photographer Dave Decker, the rally occupied as much as three city blocks at one point, and no counter protesters were present. Read more and see all the photos via cltampa. com/slideshows.—Colin Wolf

10 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 11

FULL-SERVICE MARKETING AGENCY. LOCAL ROOTS. NATIONAL REACH.

12 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

“Within the story of a city, you want to see the layers of history, the layers of development.” POLITICS

ISSUES

OPINION

A sense of place

Why we should talk about historic preservation in Tampa Bay. By Ray Roa The matter is now in the hands of Tampa City Council which has officially been asked to review the plans for the parcel and halt Kolter’s demolition permit. “Any historic building can be made to look like it is impossible to restore,” Vivian Salaga, HPC Chair, said in her comments. “Downtown has already lost an indescribable number of its historic buildings for a lack of attention of the

MAY I BE FRANKLIN? The downtown Tampa intersection of Polk and Franklin looks different than it did in the ‘30s. owners of those buildings to have an attitude of civic pride and historic pride—and the restoration of those buildings fall into that category.” As he left the meeting, Manny Leto told CL not just about the environmental impact of demolishing structures (“the greenest building is a building that’s already been built”), but about community memory and character.

Aloft Hotel, Oxford Exchange and the Franklin Exchange—all good examples of those layers and adaptive reuse. “That gives a city a sense of identity and a sense of place. Those things you could argue are more ephemeral and harder to define,” Leto added. He knows historic preservation departments are criminally underfunded and that you can’t save every building, but is adamant that the uniqueness of that layering is what makes other cities—be they Savannah, Charleston, Key West, Cedar Key or Chicago— stand out from the others. In St. Petersburg, he’d like to see the Community Planning and Preservation Commission (CPPC) take initiatives to undertake surveys and studies of historic buildings like churches. Tampa could do it with its structures like cigar factories, schools and more. In his eyes, buildings that get studied are the ones that get attention and get funded. To Leto, developers and preservation entities would do well to work more closely in making sure preservation is possible and beneficial to an entire community. Leto’s former TBHC colleague Kite-Powell also knows that some buildings must fall. “We’d be sitting in a forest right now or next to buildings made of wood,” he joked. But to him, it’s also important to think of the people who used certain historic structures when considering their preservation. Kite-Powell served on Tampa’s first-ever HPC and has been part of decisions that preserved the facades of entire blocks of downtown Tampa. He argued that certain historic preservation tax breaks and credits can help a developer make some of their money back. But more than anything, he worries that we as a city might overlook the small pieces and neighborhoods that are part of the puzzle and fabric that make a community. There’s no going back when those puzzle pieces are gone. “The picture’s gone, and now all you have left are pictures,” Kite-Powell said. But seeing pictures of Franklin Street and Seventh Avenue are not the same as actually walking down Franklin and Seventh. “It’s a living city that has parts to it, some new and some old, but they all come together to make the city,” he explained. “But when you lose all the old parts, you’ve lost the old city, right?” Not if preservation can help it.

HISTORIC PRESERVATION

BURGERT BROS.

n city council chambers on Tuesday, Dennis Fernandez stood before the Historic Preservation Commission (HPC) to explain why the City of Tampa is seeking emergency action to halt the demolition permit for downtown’s old Tarr Furniture building. Technically at 520 N Tampa St.—and together with the property next door at 514 N Tampa St.—the strip of Tarr storefront now consists of Moxie’s Cafe, the soon-to-relocate Bamboozle Cafe and First Watch. Tampa Bay History Center (TBHC) curator Rodney KitePowell told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that 514 N Tampa St. was originally Hotel Arno, erected in 1895 and one of the oldest buildings in downtown Tampa. One building was once home to the Tampa Tribune. Late last year, Developer Kolter Urban paid $11.64 million for the properties, plus a small alley next door. On Monday, Kolter, responsible for St. Petersburg’s 41-story “One” residential tower, filed plans to build “One Tampa,” a 55-story, 311-unit condo tower that would be the tallest building on Florida’s west coast; condos will sell for an average of $1.35 million, according to lawyers for the buyer (about $419 million if you’re keeping score). Critics of demolition have pointed to the historic nature of the architecture and argued that the facade could be incorporated into the developer’s new design. Others even alluded to past empty promises of development before demolition and suggested that demolition only be approved if the developer pulls a building permit (Maas Brothers is still a parking lot, after all). Fernandez, Tampa’s Architectural Review and Historic Preservation Manager, said that his staff believes the structure meets the criteria for National Register designation and made his case to the HPC by citing city code and an evaluation by his office. Armed with dramatically large binders for every HPC member and Fernandez’s staff, lawyers for Kolter mostly cited damage inside the building to make a case for the demo permit to go forward. The discussion painfully lasted roughly three hours, but in the end, the HPC voted in favor of the emergency action to stop the demolition permit (only Susan Swift voted no).

Leto is a 45-year-old born-and-raised Tampeño who worked at the Tampa Bay History Center for 13 years before taking over as Executive Director of Preserve The ‘Burg last summer. He pointed to how preservationists often end up on the right side of history. (Remember when the then-St. Petersburg Times wrote an editorial more or less saying the Vinoy was not worth saving?) He extolled the economic benefits of preservation, but most poignantly talked about a sense of place.

“Within the story of a city, you want to see the layers of history, the layers of development,” Leto said, adding that he certainly doesn’t want a city in stasis or frozen in time. Instead, he wants to see periods of development in the course of a city’s history. A short walk from Tampa City Hall are the old Tampa Bay Hotel (University of Tampa),

cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 13

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Join us for the First Annual

This is a two-day event located on the Backlot at 2100 3rd Ave. S. in St. Petersburg, between 3 Daughters Brewing and the Train Station. Sip & stroll to live music on both days along with over 30 local arts and craft vendors. Food trucks on-site for dining needs. OR, purchase a VIP ticket for the most amazing Backlot experience.

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cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 15

We’re not worthy: Some of Tampa Bay’s overlooked preservation wins There are plenty of historic preservation shit-the-bed moments in Tampa Bay. In St. Petersburg, there are the La Plaza and Florida theaters, Huntington and Pheil hotels and even the old Webb’s City (don’t forget how the Soreno Hotel was blown to hell for the credits of “Lethal Weapon III”). In Tampa, there’s the Maas Brothers department store, Victory Theatre, the Jai Alai fronton (yeah, I said it), Seminole Heights Baptist Church (sans the steeple) and the Mediterranean Revival style Davis Islands house at 418 Blanca Ave. which was once home to former Florida Gov. LeRoy Collins. But there are plenty of wins, too. Here are a few to wipe away some of that cynicism swishing around your tear ducts.

Tuesday, June 14th, 2022 The Orlo in Historic Hyde Park A portion of proceeds benefits Feeding Tampa Bay meetthechefstampabay.com #meetthechefstampabay

The Scrub “The Harlem of the South” was a place where Central Avenue hosted Ray Charles, Ella Fitzgerald and Cab Calloway. More than that though, The Scrub was a Tampa neighborhood built by free slaves after the Civil War. By the ‘50s, however, the neighborhood was more or less obliterated in the name of urban renewal (a 1951 “Report on the City Plan of Tampa, Florida” called The Scrub “one of the most insidious and cancerous infections in the city”). But early this month, Paul Guzzo reported that the Tampa Housing Authority, a driving force of that “renewal” is doing the tiniest something after purchasing The Scrub’s last residential homes on Scott Street, which will be restored and then surrounded by possibly a dozen affordable housing units. St. James Episcopal Church, just a couple blocks away, is being fixed up, too.

University of Tampa Opened in the late-19th century and once a Gilded Age wonder of Tampa, the Tampa Bay Hotel was a destination before effects of the Great Depression forced it to close in the ‘30s. Furniture left there was looted, and the casino and boat house burned down. Considered an eyesore, city officials leased it to Tampa Bay Junior College for next to nothing. Now it’s the University of Tampa— and very hard to imagine the Hillsborough River without those minarets. Franklin Exchange Once the tallest building in Tampa—and doomed for demolition in 1999—Carolyn Wilson has been behind the restoration of this block that includes the 1923 Exchange National Bank, attached to an annex and tower now home to a myriad of office tenants (including Creative Loafing Tampa Bay) and C.W.’s Gin Joint. And yes, there was once a newsstand on the corner of nearby Williams Corner on Franklin and Zack Streets.

HISTORIC PRESERVATION

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The Vinoy You wouldn’t know it today, but St. Pete’s Vinoy hotel saw some dark days. The Vinoy, once barracks for soldiers during World War II and set for demolition in the ‘80s, was saved by locals like Anet Willingham who were adamant about its historical significance and contribution to a sense of place.

Ybor City From the various social clubs (Cuban, Sociedad La Unión Martí-Maceo, Italian, Centro Asturiano, Centro Español) to the Ritz, Demmi’s Market, Columbia, El Pasaje, Tampa Florida Brewery/La Tropical Beer compound, and more, Ybor City is living history.—Ray Roa

26 t h, 2022

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Tampa Theatre Across the street from Wilson’s block, this gem opened in 1926, but was slated for demolition by the mid-’70s, with folks for its destruction deploying much of the same reasoning used to rationalize demolition of old buildings today. Saved by citizens and the Arts Council of TampaHillsborough County (with much credit to then Councilman Lee Duncan and late mayor Bill Poe), I’d like to see someone suggest tearing Tampa Theatre down these days.

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SORE EYES FOLLOW ME HERE: The Tampa Bay Hotel, before it became a nuisance.

GO WITH THE FLO: Floridian Social Club (FKA State Theatre) took home an award for ‘Renovation/Restoration of a Designated Landmark.’

Character wins

Floridian Social Club among honorees at Preserve the ‘Burg awards. By Ray Roa

very other year, Preserve the ‘Burg (PTB) recognizes its neighbors—be they homeowners, business owners and even developers—who’ve worked to maintain the character within one of the fastest growing cities in the U.S. Late last month, the nonprofit recognized work in 17 categories including the renovation and restoration at Central Avenue’s Floridian Social Club (FKA State Theatre), which recently hosted its a national headliner and took home the award for “Renovation/Restoration of a Designated Landmark.” “Constructed in 1924 as Alexander National Bank, the building was repurposed in 1949 as a movie theater. It operated as a jazz club and, later, as a live music venue,” presenters said during the awards ceremony. “Alterations in 2018 through 2020 brought back original 1924 elements and also retained and restored certain 1949 designs such as the awning above the entrance that had since gained significance and spoke to the unique evolution of the building, which will turn 100 years old in just a couple of years.” Other notable winners were Ken and Gina Burchenal (“Sense of Place, Community Storytelling”) who purchased Jack Kerouac’s Disston Heights home in 2020, and have hosted events to honor the revered American author. Lechon sandwich heaven Bodega also took home hardware for its restoration of the SpanishItalian/art deco elements in the Smalley-Green Auto Building, citing ownership’s use of tax

credits reserved for long-term improvements. Ferg’s even got some love for the way it saved the historic World Liquors sign. Burt and Carole Kline, who’ve long plated a role in the Historic Old Northeast neighborhoods, received PTB’s “Preservationist of the Year” award. See all the winners of Preserve the ‘Burg’s 2022 Preservation Awards below and look even further to see about remaining events including Saturday’s Preserve The ‘Burg Expo. • Renovation/Restoration - Residential 2710 2nd Ave. N., Andrew & Starr Blaser, owners • Renovation/Restoration - Institutional St. Pete High School Pinellas County Schools/ Rowe Architects/ C r e a t i v e Contractors • Renovation/ Restoration Commercial Bodega on Central-Blake Whitney Thompson, Blake Investment Partners, George & Debbie Sayegh (Bodega Owners) • Renovation/Restoration of a Designated Landmark Floridian Theater Kevin Chadwick, owner • Adaptive Reuse - Residential American Baptist Church of the Beatitudes Bluewater Builders/Jason Sanchez • Compatible Design within a Local Historic District 700 31 St. N., Allen Campbell & Craig Hepworth and Domain Homes • Compatible Design within a Nondesignated Historic Neighborhood Hughey Home 750 2nd St N, Pam and David Hughey, EDAD Studio.

• Accessory Dwelling Unit 2500 Burlington Ave. N. Zach Curry, owner • Preservation Craftsmanship Union Trust Bank-All Trades Historical Restoration • Sense of Place, Community Storytelling Jack Kerouac House of St. Petersburg-Ken and Gina Burchenal • Sense of Place, Community Space Polish American Society-Roger Telschow and Monika Smolarczyk • Historic Sign Restoration Fergs/World Liquors historic sign, Mark Ferguson • Preservation Publication “Sophie and Zack at Sunken Gardens” Children’s Education Project Sunken Gardens Forever Foundation (SGFF) • Preservation Education Howard Knapp - “Then and Now” posts in “Remember In St Petersburg When…” Facebook Page social media • Maureen Stafford Award New Light Restoration, Trevor Sieders (owner) • Preservationist of the Year Burt and Carol Kline • Preservation Legacy/Lifetime Achievement Howard Fenford Hansen Historic Preservation Month events this weekend Café con Tampa: Preservation & The Economic Impact of Historic Preservation

One of Tampa’s best examples of historic preservation, Oxford Exchange, plays host to Café con Tampa where this week’s early morning talk is all about the economic impact of historic preservation. Speakers include Dennis Fernandez—Tampa’s Historic Preservation Manager, who had one hell of a morning during the Historic Preservation Committee meeting at city hall on Tuesday—and Manny Leto, Executive Director of Preserve the ‘Burg. Your cover includes breakfast and the tip, and if you can’t afford it, there’s a way to request a “scholarship” entry, too. Friday, May 20, 8 a.m. $12. Oxford Exchange, 420 W Kennedy Blvd., Tampa. @cafecontampa on Facebook Preserve the ‘Burg Expo For five hours, Preserve The ‘Burg hosts an all-ages, familyfriendly expo, with one of the Sunshine City’s most beloved historic venues acting as the hub. Starting at 10 a.m., local preservation experts will help residents learn about researching and maintaining their historic homes, creating historic districts plus navigating design guidelines and the certificate of appropriateness process. There’ll be guided tours of nearby Mirror Lake along with activities for children, wood window demos and more. This is 10,000-times better than going to Home Depot, people. Saturday, May 21. 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Free with RSVP, donations accepted. St. Pete Shuffle, 559 Mirror Lake Dr. N, St. Petersburg. ptb.wildapricot.org

HISTORIC PRESERVATION

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20 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

Kettle call

As she called for transparency, Tampa Mayor kept public in the dark about DOJ investigation, city center project. By Justin Garcia In the same month Castor came under fire for “crime free” housing, the community started asking who approved the city’s controversial $108 million Hanna Avenue project. At the time, Castor’s chief of Staff John Bennett and the city’s legal staff told city council that they didn’t know who had given the massively flawed project the green light. Experts said the project may have violated state law in its private bidding process (the Black community and unions also decried the city for not including them in the original planning of the project). It wasn’t until last month—weeks after calling out city council members for transparency and accountability issues—that Castor admitted to approving Hanna Avenue City Center. Still, last week at Castor’s State of the City speech, the mayor celebrated the Hanna Avenue project and said that Tampa protects its marginalized residents. “We are a city that will always stand up for the rights of all of our residents,” Castor said. “Those who feel that their fundamental American rights are threatened, especially

LOCAL NEWS

women, people of color and our LGBT community, know that Tampa has your back.” Yvette Lewis, President of the Hillsborough NAACP says that the mayor’s actions and lack of transparency about “crime free” and Hanna Avenue contradict the mayor’s sentiment. “I don’t feel like the city has the back of most Black people,” Lewis told CL. “Maybe if you meet a certain status quo, or hold a certain amount of wealth, but the mayor’s words at the state of the city are just another example of how she tries to cover things up.”Lewis also had a problem with Castor saying, “Tampa is nothing without its neighborhoods” in the speech. She wonders which neighborhoods the mayor was talking about. “Drive through Black neighborhoods like East Tampa and tell me our neighborhoods are being taken care of like the mayor claims,” Lewis said. “And other neighborhoods that she helped gentrify with her programs like ‘biking while Black’ and ‘renting while Black.’ And over

the past six months she’s been covering up that the city is under federal investigation again for a program that targeted Black people.” CL reached out to the city’s communications department for comment, but did not receive a response, but Lewis and Lockett are not alone in their criticism of Castor’s approach to being transparent with the public and city council. Last month, Sandy Freedman—who served two terms as Tampa’s first female mayor after a turn as chair of city council—told CL “the mayor’s administration itself has to be more transparent and less defensive.” Meanwhile, Lockett just wants the secrets and the stubbornness from the city towards its poor and working class Black community to end. “To be a good leader, you need to have a heart that listens to the people, even the poor and struggling people,” Lockett said. “And you need to be vulnerable and transparent with the people, because they elected you.”

“She got used to people doing exactly what she said and being able to control the narrative.”

JUSTIN GARCIA

n April, Tampa Mayor Jane Castor called for more transparency from city council. But at the same time, she was keeping two big secrets from the public and council itself—a Department of Justice Investigation into its “crime free” housing program, and the fact that she had approved the controversial City Center at Hanna Avenue project. Some local leaders have a problem with that and say the mayor shouldn’t arbitrarily decide when transparency is important. “Transparency should be for every elected official, not just some people, who the mayor wants the public to focus on,” Robin Lockett told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “At the end of the day, it’s all taxpayers’ money, and the people deserve to know the issues that Mayor Castor has withheld from the public.” Lockett—Tampa Bay’s regional director for Florida Rising, a political nonprofit that advocates for historically marginalized communities—has spoken at several city council meetings, about both the Hanna Avenue project and “crime free” among other issues. In her view, Castor is trying to operate the city like she would a police department. “As a high ranking police officer and then police chief, she got used to people doing exactly what she said and being able to control the narrative,” Lockett said. “But being a politician isn’t supposed to be like that, the people elected you, so you have to listen to them and be honest with them.” She added that the mayor’s handling of “crime free” is similar to the way she dealt with “biking while Black,” which in 2016 the Department of Justice said disproportionately ticketed Black cyclists. “She finally had to admit ‘biking while Black’ was wrong when running for mayor, but never really apologized for the harm it did to our Black community,” Lockett said. Last December, the City of Tampa came under investigation by the U.S. Department of Justice for its “crime free multi-housing” program, which the Tampa Bay Times found targeted Black renters for eviction. But Castor’s administration kept the federal investigation from the public until April 29, 10 days after CL had submitted a public records request about it. Castor defended “biking while Black” when it was under DOJ investigation, and she’s also used easily debunked logic to defend the “crime free” program over and over again, even after TPD changed it to a new program called S.A.F.E. “She’s repeating that behavior right now, and on top of that she wasn’t transparent about the investigation,” Lockett added.

DAIS RIGHT: Some leaders say the mayor shouldn’t arbitrarily decide when transparency is important.

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The great complacent

Extremism has become so acceptable on the right that it’s no longer extreme.

he 18-year-old white supremacist who drove 200 miles to shoot 13 people—10 fatally, 11 Black—in Buffalo, N.Y., with an AR-15 on Saturday serves as yet another reminder of how thoroughly the corrupt sociopaths at the NRA have warped this country’s discourse about guns. That we’ve skipped the usual performative calls for “reform” only reveals the depths of our surrender. But the massacre should serve as a powerful reminder of another depressing reality. The right has convinced many Americans that the country has been endangered by “wokeness”: schoolchildren learning about racism and having access to books with LGBTQ characters; social media platforms banning and corporations shunning conspiracy theorists and bigots. For the last year, invented panics about critical race theory and cancel culture have dominated headlines. But that’s not where the monsters lie. The Buffalo gunman, whom I won’t name, is an aficionado of the Great Replacement Theory, the idea that liberals are bringing in immigrants to outvote decent white Americans, who aren’t birthing enough babies to keep up. It’s easy enough to trace the theory’s intellectual journey from a New Deal-era Mississippi senator (and KKK member) to the Charlottesville Tiki torch parade in 2017 (“Jews will not replace us!”) to, most recently, Fox News pundit Tucker Carlson, who took it mainstream. While Carlson has the biggest microphone, he’s arguably not the most important offender. Last year, Rep. Elise Stefanik of New York, the third-ranking House Republican, paid for Facebook ads that accused “radical Democrats” of plotting a “PERMANENT E L E C T I O N INSURRECTION.” “Their plan to grant amnesty to 11 MILLION illegal immigrants will overthrow our current electorate and create a permanent liberal majority in Washington,” the ad says, with an image of brown people reflected in Joe Biden’s sunglasses. In other words, Great Replacement Theory—though Stefanik’s staff called it a “new disgusting low for the Left, their Never Trump allies, and the sycophant stenographers in the media” to label it as such after the Buffalo shooting. A few weeks before she complained about the media reporting on what her ads said, she took to the House floor to denounce the supposed

“invasion” on the southern border. Two days after the Buffalo shooting, she went back to the well: “Democrats desperately want wide open borders and mass amnesty for illegals allowing them to vote.” Stefanik isn’t alone among Republican politicians, of course. JD Vance, the faux-populist who recently won the GOP nomination for Senate in Ohio, told Carlson in March: “Democrat politicians who have decided that they can’t win reelection in 2022 unless they bring in a large number of new voters to replace the voters that are already here.” Rep. Matt Gaetz, the Florida congressman under federal investigation for dalliances with a teenager, believes Carlson “is CORRECT about Replacement Theory.” Arizona state Sen. Wendy Rogers, an election conspiracy theorist, thinks “we are being replaced and invaded.” Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich said that immigrants would “drown” out “classic Americans.” (Whatever could he mean?) Stefanik replaced Rep. Liz Cheney of Wyoming in the GOP leadership last year after Cheney was ousted for being anti-sedition. To win the job, Stefanik transformed herself from a pro-business Republican to the kind of full-on culture warrior who last week called Democrats “pedo grifters,” a wink to her party’s QAnon reactionaries. On Monday, Cheney tweeted: “The House GOP leadership has enabled white nationalism, white supremacy, and anti-semitism. History has taught us that what begins with words ends in far worse.” Cheney is undeniably correct and also likely to lose her primary in August. That is, in a nutshell, the modern Republican Party. This sort of demagogic incitement— “replace,” “pedo grifters,” “invaded,” “overthrow”—has consequences. Not just what we saw in Buffalo—and before that, in Pittsburgh and El Paso, where mass shooters similarly embraced the white-replacement delusion—but in everyday vitriol and violence directed at members of marginalized and targeted groups. The more acceptable extremism becomes, the more violence will follow. Reported hate crimes based on race rose nearly 40% from 2019 to 2020, according to the most recent FBI data, a byproduct of a Trump era rife with racial division.

INFORMED DISSENT

“The House GOP leadership has enabled white nationalism, white supremacy, and anti-semitism.”

24 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

GAGE SKIDMORE

By Jeffrey C. Billman

REPLACE HIM: Fox News pundit Tucker Carlson took GRT mainstream. With Republicans turning their culture war on classroom “groomers,” don’t be shocked if the 2021 and 2022 data reveal increasing violence against the LGBTQ community. We can’t worry only about hate crimes. Political violence will become more common, too, as will the overlap in this Venn diagram: right-wing terrorism, which is already the most urgent security threat the country faces. Extremism has become so acceptable on the right that it’s no longer extreme. On Tuesday, Pennsylvania Republicans might nominate candidates for senator and/or governor who participated in the Jan. 6 insurrection. Last week, Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis appointed a QAnon nutter to the state education board, then made her equally extremist husband the secretary of state with authority over elections. The wife of a Supreme Court justice plotted with the White House chief of staff to overturn the results of an election; there were no consequences. The court’s hard-right bloc is poised to obliterate a half-century of abortion

precedents—and remove protections for birth control and same-sex marriage, too, while anti-abortion groups plot to ban the procedure nationally—after lying to the Senate about Roe v. Wade being “settled law”; no consequences there, either. And just as DeSantis used state law to punish Disney for halting donations to Republican politicians, Republican jurists want to prevent social media companies from regulating their own platforms. Last week, the right-wing Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals backed an absurd Texas law that prohibits many apps and websites from moderating posts by Texas residents—and prohibits companies from not doing business in Texas. (The judges did not seem particularly tech-savvy; one insisted that Facebook and Google “are not websites” but are “internet providers” instead—which, well, no.) The Buffalo gunman live-streamed the shootings on Twitch, which removed his post within two minutes. Legal experts say that under Texas’ law, a Texas resident could sue the Amazon-owned company for doing so.

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Shit Happened THURSDAY 12

SATURDAY 14

Hillsborough’s Clerk of Court announced plans for a “Love Is Love” wedding for 50 couples to kick off Pride Month. It goes down on June 2, and there better not be any biggoty protesters there.

FRIDAY 13 Florida attracted a record number of tourists during the first three months of 2022, with Visit Florida saying that 35.982 million people traveled to the state between the start of January and the end of March. And not one of them mentioned how they won’t come if we don’t build a baseball stadium for the Rays, right?

NICOLE ABBETT

COVID19WARROOM/TWITTER

On the same day Joe Biden ordered flags to fly at half-mast to honor nearly 1 million people in the U.S. who died from COVID-19 (roughly 74,000 of those deaths were from Florida), an advocacy group flew an airplane over downtown Tampa. Behind it was a banner that read “Reckless Ron.” Meanwhile, a man on the ground just yelled, “Let’s Go Brandon” over and over again.

The Tampa Bay Lightning eked out a 2-1 win over the Toronto Maple Leafs and advanced to the second round of the Stanley Cup Playoffs. The team doesn’t have home ice advantage though, so traffic won’t be cray every day next week.

MONDAY 16

The average price of a gallon of regular unleaded gasoline in Florida reached $4.50, and more price hikes could be coming. The most-expensive gas in Florida is in Palm Beach and Broward Counties though, so go Champa Bay, right?? More shit, listening to developers cry about how they can’t make their money back if the city pushes back on them, via cltampa.com/ news.

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FOOD & DRINK EVENTS RESTAURANTS

RECIPES

Brutiful

DINING GUIDES

New St. Pete taproom finally celebrates grand opening, plus more foodie news. By Kyla Fields

THEBRUTALIST.BEER/FACEBOOK

he folks behind King State—Tampa’s go-to Lineup for Thursday’s Margarita Wars are between 3 Daughters Brewing and the Morean spot for craft coffee and beer—are ready to announced Center for Clay’s train station—the aptlycelebrate the grand opening of their new Margarita Wars is back for its seventh year with named Backlot Wine & Beer Weekend kicks brewery and taproom across the bridge (The 16 local bartenders competing to win the title of off Friday. Brutalist andTemple of Beer). Tampa Bay’s Ultimate Margarita. Join Creative The lively jazz band Hot Tonic Orchestra Alongside live music from Tampa electro duo Loafing Tampa Bay for a unique opportunity headlines Friday’s “Wine & Jazz” event, while Alien House (which recently hosted its listening to sample margaritas created by more than ‘80s cover band The Spazmatics provides highparty at King State) and rapper Notsew, made- a dozen of the Tampa Bay area’s best mixolo- energy tunes for Saturday’s “Beer Fest.” to-order pizzas from Luna Rossa Cucina Rustica gists and try your hand at tipsy judging as you Friday’s festivities run from 6 p.m.-9 p.m. and exclusive bottle and can releases will fuel help award Tampa Bay’s Ultimate Margarita. while Saturday’s event happens from 1 p.m.-4 the partygoers. p.m. General admission tickets Special releases to grab at this include unlimited samples of beer weekend’s grand opening party or wine—and can be found on include Brutalist collaborations eventbrite.com. VIP tickets are also with Illinois' Mikerphone Brewing available and will get you early and Sarasota’s Calusa Brewing, entry and VIP-only food, or you can its debut imperial stout and snag a weekend pass if you want more. According to The Brutalist access to both days of drinking. In Instagram (@ thebrutalist.beer), addition to unlimited sips and live customers can soon expect a consismusic, there will also be food trucks tent food truck schedule alongside and local vendors on site. an industry, trivia, and neighborA portion of ticket sales will hood night. benefit two local charities, Hero The Brutalist and its taproom to a Child and Operation Craft counterpart technically opened in Brew Deployment, according to March during Tampa Bay Beer a press release. This inaugural Week’s inaugural King State event is organized by the newlyLagerfest, but has been operating formed events company 3 Sheets with tentative hours as the new Events, which is affiliated with brewery transitions into full service. popular 3 Daughters Brewing, The self-described “pinnacle as the two businesses share of community brewing” took over a principal address. Backlot Flying Boat Brewery in January Wine & Beer Weekend. Fridayand has expanded its production Saturday, May 20-21. $55 & up. space, adding capacity for 90 more 2100 3rd Ave. S, St. Petersburg. @ barrels and canning equipment. 3Sheetsevents on Facebook Its minimalist taproom counterpart features large TVs, a large BREW-TAL: The Brutalist technically opened in March, but is finally The 11th annual Cuban Sandwich L-shaped bar, as well as and outcelebrating this weekend. Festival returns to Tampa this door seating area. There’s also a month cooler stacked with King State’s newe and popular Thursday, May 19. 8 p.m. $30 & up. Tampa River Whether you think lettuce and tomato belong beers like its Hazy IPA and American West Coast Center, 402 W. Laurel St., Tampa. margarita- on the Cuban sandwich or not is debatable, but style IPA collaboration with Tampa neighbors warstampabay.com folks from both sides of that heated argument Magnanimous Brewing. will definitely be in Ybor City for an annual celThe Temple of Beer is now open from 4 p.m.-10 Inaugural Backlot Wine & Beer Weekend hap- ebration of the Tampeño classic. The 11th annual p.m. Tuesday-Saturday, noon-4 p.m. on Sundays pening in St. Peter Cuban Sandwich Festival returns to Ybor City’s and closed Mondays. The Brutalist/Temple of Craft beer and wine are the stars of 3 Sheets Centennial Park next weekend. Beer grand opening. Saturday, May 21, noon. Events’ debut party, which happens in St. In addition to the plethora of pork-stuffed Free (bring money for libations). 1776 11th Ave., Petersburg’s Warehouse Arts District this sammies to choose from, there will be local St. Petersburg. templeofbeer.com weekend. Taking place in the empty lot located continued on page 31

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SO FRESH & SO CLEAN: There’s no way this isn’t healthy. continued from page 29 vendors and artists scattered throughout the festival grounds, alongside live music and dancing. Cubansandwhichfestival.com says there’ll be over 50 vendors present. Restaurants from Tampa Bay and beyond travel to the annual festival to battle in its fiercely-contended “Best Cuban Sandwich” competition. Folks even travel from countries like South Korea and England to compete, according to the fest’s website. Every year, the festival tries to beat its record of the “World’s Longest Cuban Sandwich,” and in 2021 produced a whopping 225 foot-long sandwich. The festival is free to attend, but if you prefer the VIP experience, you can grab a ticket on eventbrite.com for $80. This upgrade will get you into a shaded VIP-only area, samples of the “best sandwich” contenders, and red carpet photo opportunities. Judges for this year’s competition include Kissimmee mayor Olga Gonzalez and Cuban-American actor Roberto Escobar, alongside others. This is a kid and (leashed) dogfriendly festival. 11th annual Cuban Sandwich Festival. Saturday, May 29, noon-6 p.m. No cover (VIP available, bring money for libations). Centennial Park, 1800 E 8th Ave., Ybor City. @ cubansandwichfestival on Facebook

The Minnesota-based company announced its expansion earlier this week, adding that it will open five locations throughout Southwest and Central Florida this spring and summer. On the Crisp & Green website, there are actually three different Tampa locations “coming soon” alongside other slated storefronts in Miami, Sarasota and Orlando. Crisp & Green is known for its health-forward approach to fast casual dining; popular items on its menu include salads, build-yourown grain bowls and smoothies. Most locations boast a large refrigerated display of the fresh produce that’s used in its many dishes. The franchise also regularly collaborates with fitness studios and trainers in whatever city it’s in, so expect Tampa’s upcoming Crisp & Green to work with local gyms and influencers. There are a number of vegan and vegetarian options offered on the nutrition-focused eatery’s menu. Florida’s first Crisp & Green in Venice was slated to open last week, and its upcoming Naples location will celebrate its grand opening shortly thereafter. “Floridians are seeking high-quality food with great flavor that is healthy and they can grab on the run,” Crisp & Green Founder and CEO, Steele Smiley wrote. “We are grateful to be able to meet customer demand with fresh menu items and become the fast and healthy option in Central and Southwest Florida this summer,” a press release states. There are no additional details about where exactly Tampa’s upcoming restaurant will be located, so follow the franchise on Facebook and Instagram—both at @crispandgreen—to keep up with the latest information.

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Fast casual chain Crisp & Green will open its first Tampa location this summer Tampa’s upcoming Sweetgreen is set to have some competition. Tampa Bay is just a small area included in Crisp & Green’s massive expansion throughout the country, which includes a whopping 30 locations opening over the next few years.

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Slice is life

26 essential Tampa Bay pizza spots everybody should try at least once. By Brandalynn Nuñez Cepeda are available to make it a good time for everyone. Multiple locations. cappyspizzaonline.com Crafty Squirrel This Central Avenue bar has plenty of artisanal pizzas for those looking to experience the simple meal in a new way. Swipe right on the “Beefy Tinder-loin” pie covered in steak and Alabama BBQ—or keep it easy and build your own. 259 Central Ave., St. Petersburg, 727898-4888. craftysquirrel.com Cristino’s Coal Oven Pizza After soaking up the sun at Clearwater beach, make the short drive to a place that creates its dishes the oldfashioned way. The coal oven adds a flavor that not every joint can replicate. The fresh ingredients (and signature basil garnish) takes pies to the next level without overcomplicating the process. 1101 S Ft. Harrison Ave., Clearwater, 727-443-4900. cristinoscoaloven.com

DINING GUIDE

for the crass t-shirt you get as a prize). 2660 Bayshore Blvd., Dunedin, 727-754-6144. madisonavepizza.com Magdalena’s Pizzeria It’s a family endeavor at this small pizzeria; $6 lunch specials and the illusive cannoli poppers—deep fried dough with sweet ricotta filling—are what keep customers coming back for more. 2313 W Linebaugh Ave., Tampa, 813-252-7158. magdalenaspizzeriamenu.com Mario’s New York Pizza Make sure you stop by on an empty stomach, because the menu is filled with hefty portions for a great deal. Dig into one of the “Godfather specials” to feed the fam or a one pound slice of philly cheesesteak pizza to satisfy all your cravings. 3993 Tyrone Blvd. N, St. Petersburg, 727-347-2424. mariosnypizza.com New World Brewery Not just a great spot for a cold one and local show, New World stone sears its pizzas for a much more authentic crisp to your crust. If you’re looking for a change, try the black bean sauce on your unique ‘za. 810 E Skagway Ave., Tampa, 813-304-0460. newworldtampa.com

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ampa Bay may not be known for pizza, but that’s starting to change. Recently, the area was ranked among the top pizza cities in the country, even beating out juggernaut pizza stronghold New York City. And, while haters will say Tampa isn’t a ‘za-town, we couldn’t disagree more. From Clearwater, to downtown St. Pete and beyond, here are a few of the area’s favorite pizza joints. 4th Street Pizza 4th Street makes its dough and sauce fresh daily to ensure not a single slice lacks in quality. If pizza isn’t your thing, grab a cheesesteak or a chicken parm. 3187 4th St. N, St. Petersburg, 727-895-8178. 4thstreetpizzas.business.site ABC Pizza House This classic family pizzeria cooks up familiar flavors, but has interesting options for those looking to go outside their comfort zone. Keep it simple with a meat lover’s special or venture into the unknown with a gyro pizza, which is basically a flat version of the hand-held. 1242 W Hillsborough Ave no. 1314, Tampa, 813-237-3324. abcpizzahousetampa.com Ava There are plenty of upscale takes on Italian classics at Ava, but the true stars are its hand-crafted slices with the fanciest combinations. Goat cheese and pesto pies and dough covered in quality mushrooms make this restaurant a fine-dining haven. If you make it for brunch, try the breakfast pizza, which is basically a loaded omelet on some crust. The pies at the Armature Works food stall are just about as good as the flagship too. 718 S Howard Ave., Tampa, 813-512-3030. avatampa.com Bavaro’s Neapolitan pizzas doused in toppings we can’t pronounce are what you can expect from a dining experience at Bavaro’s. If you want to try your hand at recreating its signature pizzas, purchase its tomato sauce on Amazon (but unless you have dough made from 100-year old yeast, it probably won’t compare). 514 N Franklin St. no. 101, Tampa, 813-8684440. bavarospizza.com Bella’s Italian Cafe This pizza oven on the end of S Howard Avenue is as legendary as the late nights at the South Tampa staple’s bar. The best part is that the pies—from the traditional margherita to the wild pazzo pazzo and hearty Paulie—are too small to share with another person (and half-price during Bella’s famous late night happy hour). 1413 S Howard Ave. Suite 100, Tampa. 813-254-3355. bellasitaliancafe.com Cappy’s Pizza Besides tons of vintage doo-dads on the walls, deep-dish to die for and lengthy New York slices are what you can find at this Tampa Bay favorite. Plenty of traditional toppings and the less traditional vegan cheeses

town. 203 E Twiggs St., Tampa, 813-229-8500. eddieandsamspizza.com Frank’s Pizza The family-owned spot offers a relaxed atmosphere perfect for a casual night out with friends or family. Its menu is packed with items made from scratch using secret recipes you’ll have to pry from nonna’s hands. 1600 Achieva Way, Dunedin, 727-2166963. frankspizzaclearwater.com Gourmet Pizza Co. This might be the best vegan pie in town, but there’s plenty for the herbivores, at this Hyde Park Staple where meats come from the local butcher and veggies get sliced daily. Don’t be surprised to see Marvel movie and Tampa dog daddy Dave Bautista picking up a pie here, too. 610 S Armenia Ave., Tampa, 813-258-1999. gourmetpizza-company.com Lee’s Grocery A true neighborhood pizza joint in every sense of the word, Lee’s Grocery specializes in stone baked pizzas with names like “Deadman’s Party” and “Minor Threat”, the monikers just as funky as its purple paint job. Don’t skip the wings either. 2210 N Central Ave., Tampa, 813-374-0179. leesgrocery.com

SOUTH OF THE SOUTH: The pie at Bella’s is as legendary as the South Howard staple’s late nights. Eddie and Sam’s Pizza Don’t let Dave Portnoy’s approval steer you away. This mustexperience Tampa pizzeria is just a brief walk from Curtis Hixon and has been a downtown Tampa staple for years. Big greasy slices and dough made from New York water are the ticket here. Arguably the best cheese slice in

Madison Avenue Pizza The reigning champ, Madison Avenue Pizza, bagged this year’s CL Best of The Bay “Reader’s Choice” award for best pizza, so you know they take their pie seriously. Keep it tame with your usual order, or test your stomach’s limits with its 32” pizza challenge (I’d pay good money

New York New York Pizza The Big Apple is the city of dreams, and mine are surely filled with plenty of slices of meat lover’s from this pizza joint. There are plenty of locations throughout the Bay, including one in Tampa International Airport—because what better way to calm those continued on page 35

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G-WORD: Santoro’s good as hell, but also some real ***** stuff. continued from page 33 pre-flight jitters than a pepperoni pie? If you want to do some solid people watching, grab a slice out of the Ybor City location’s window, sit back and enjoy. Multiple locations. nynypizzeria.com Old Northeast Pizza Northeast is as traditional as it gets, with reviews raving about its made-to-order quality and the convenience of its residential location. Make sure you have some cash handy when you enter, as the establishment doesn’t take cards. 718 2nd St. N, St. Petersburg, 727-209-2550 Paisano’s Pizza N’ Pasta Classic pies and dippable “pizza bones” (breadsticks) is just a glimpse of what you can get from the diverse menu at this St. Pete joint. Paisano’s has been open since the ‘70s and prides itself in still using the same recipes that made the business a local favorite. 6000 4th St. N, St. Petersburg, 727521-2656. paisanospnp.com Paulo’s Pizza Nearing its fourth decade in the St. Pete area, this family-founded spot uses a little bit of elbow grease and a whole lot of love to create its classic pizzas and hearty calzones. 6297 Central Ave. Unit A, St. Petersburg, 727347-780. @paulospizzansubs on Facebook Paul’s Chicago Pizza “Thin crust Chicagostyle pizza” is a real thing, and it’s what Paul’s is known for. However, you can also get the real deal thick pie, as well as Chicago style glizzies. Multiple locations. paulschicagopizza.com Pizza Box Not shy about cultivating unique flavors, Pizza Box flames its pies over oak and cherry wood to give the crust a sweet smokey flavor. The Box locally sources its ingredients to create fun combos like the “Angry Goat Pizza”—a spicy pie topped with goat cheese, buffalo sauce, and habanero honey. 923 Central Ave., St. Petersburg, 727-623-0444. pizzabox727.com

Pizzeria Gregario Having ethical standards brings the quality up by a lot, and this restaurant is dedicated to making all things organic. Using stone-milled flour processed in-house, the eatery takes food freshness seriously. But those looking to dip their crust in the garlic schmoo (garlic, olive oil, and lemon), are out of luck because because the joint doesn’t make pizzas from May to November. “The truth of the matter is that in order to make my living in the summer I have to burn copious amounts of [fossil] fuel and that just doesn’t sit well with me,” owner Greg Seymour said on social media. 400 2nd St. N, Safety Harbor, 727-386-4107. pizzeriagregario.com Santoro’s Pizza This modern shop with a rotating specialty pizza list is a culmination of owner Travis Kaiser’s roots in cities where they take the Italian classic pretty seriously. A Jersey-style slice with influences from Naples and Sicily is what can best describe the flavors you will sample at the restaurant that’s quickly become a staple in the NoHo neighborhood. If you love yourself, treat yourself to a bag of piping hot zeppole for dessert. 1329 W Cass St., Tampa, 813-687-7100. santorospizzeria.com Super Sardo’s Pizza Authenticity is of utmost importance to the family that runs this joint. Owner Santo Sardo is known to jokingly chastise customers that stumble over the Italian words or eat pizza with a fork and knife. Do you think they’ll boot me if I mention I dip my slice in ranch? 10839 Ulmerton Rd., Largo, 727-581-9200. sardospizza.com Toby’s Original Little Italy’s Pizza After tossing dough for half a century, it’s no surprise that Toby’s has become a local favorite for the people of St. Pete. Get a traditional pie with the usual fixings for an authentic experience at the pizza shop. 3523 49th St. N, St. Petersburg, 727522-2717. tobysoriginallittleitalypizza.com

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‘Rona. It’s still a thing, and you should call or contact these local breweries to learn their COVID-19 protocol. Email rroa@cltampa.com and stephanie@cltampa.com for any edits and suggestions. 3 DAUGHTERS BREWING One of downtown St. Pete’s District’s most popular hangouts, and a beautiful facility in which to drink some great brews. 222 22nd St. S, St. Petersburg. 727-495-6002, 3dbrewing.com 3 KEYS BREWING South-of-the-Skyway restaurant and brewery specializing in small batches. 2505 Manatee Ave. E, Bradenton. 951-218-0396, 3keysbrewing.com 5 BRANCHES BREWING Veteran-owned brewery, small batches from IPAs to stouts. Serving brews and a clear view of the Tarpon Bayou. 531 Athens St., Tarpon Springs. fivebranchesbrewing.com 7VENTH SUN BREWING Some of the best sours, IPAs and collabs going. Two locations. 1012 Broadway, Dunedin. 727-733-3013/6809 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa. 813-231-5900, 7venthsun.com 81BAY BREWING CO. South Tampa’s first craft brewery boasts a wide variety of styles. 4465 W Gandy Blvd., Tampa. 813-837-BREW, 81baybrewco.com ANGRY CHAIR Crazy-good Seminole Heights beer, open Tuesday-Sunday. Just don’t park on Fern Street (there’s a lot behind the auto body shop). 6401 N Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-238-1122, angrychairbrewing.com ARKANE ALEWORKS A wide variety of styles and flavors from the second brewery to open in Largo. 2480 E Bay Dr., No. 23, Largo. 727-270-7117, arkanebeer.com AVID BREWING This Grand Central brewing supply shop added a taproom for its beers crafted in-house. 1745 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-388-6756, avidbrew.com BARRIEHAUS BEER CO. Lager-specific brewery, carrying on an over 150 year brewing legacy. 1403 E 5th Ave., Ybor City. barriehaus.com BASTET Named after the Egyptian cat-goddess, the brewery offers seasonal ales, ciders and even the occasional hard ginger beer. 1951 E Adamo Dr. Suite B, Tampa. bastetbrewing.com BAY CANNON BEER CO. West Tampa’s first craft brewery, offering a variety of ever evolving beers, beer slushies and wine that pair perfectly with appetizers and entrées from the kitchen. 813-442-5615, baycannon.com BAYBORO BREWING CO. Veteran-owned kid-friendly brewery that has tons of events to go with its creative tap list. 2390 5th Ave. S, St. Petersburg. (727) 767-9666, bayborobrewing.com BIG STORM BREWING CO. Stop by this Pasco brewery’s Storm Room for a flight, or visit its taproom on 49th Street in Clearwater, too. 2330 Success Dr., Odessa. 727-807-7998, bigstormbrewery.com BIG TOP BREWING Perhaps Sarasota’s premier purveyor of locally crafted beer, Big Top’s reputation has spread far beyond the region. 6111 Porter Way, Sarasota. 941-371-2939, bigtopbrewing.com BOOTLEGGERS BREWING CO. This Brandon taproom from Bootleggers Beer & Wine Home Brewing Supplies offers house-made suds and guest beers. 652 Oakfield Dr., Brandon. 813-643-9463, bootleggersbrewco.com BRASSERIE ST. SOMEWHERE Award-winning Belgian farmhouse ales from veteran Bay area brewer Bob Sylvester who’s moved tastings inside his brewery. 115 S Ring Ave., Tarpon Springs. 813-503-6181, saintsomewherebrewing.com BREW BUS BREWING BB’s Seminole Heights taproom is moving a few blocks up Florida Ave., but until then sip on the Bus’ offerings at the Wesley Chapel facility. 2029 Arrowgrass Dr., Wesley Chapel. 813-452-6333, brewbususa.com BREW HUB Some of the area’s best beers are produced here along with suds for its own label. 3900 Frontage Rd. S, Lakeland. 863-698-7600, brewhub.com BREW LIFE BREWING Ultra-small batches, and a lot of ‘em. 5765 S Beneva Rd., Sarasota. 941-952-3831, brewlifebrewing.com BRIGHTER DAYS BREW CO. Tarpon Springs spot specializing in music-inspired brews like the “So Fresh n’ So Clean sour” and “All the Single Belgians.” 311 N Safford Ave., Tarpon Springs. 727-940-2350 BULLFROG CREEK BREWING CO. A multitude of styles from former garage brewers is on tap in Valrico. 3632 Lithia Pinecrest Rd., Valrico. 813-703-8835, bullfrogcreekbrewing.com CAGE BREWING Custom brews in the Grand Central District from one of the ‘Burg’s best. 2001 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-201-4278 CALEDONIA BREWING Great in-house beers in the

historic Dunedin Times building. 587 Main St., Dunedin. 727-351-5105, caledoniabrewing.com CALUSA BREWING Family owned and operated, open Tuesday-Sunday. 5701 Derek Ave., Sarasota. 941-9228150, calusabrewing.com CARROLLWOOD BREWING CO. “Secret” brewing action inside the Carrollwood location of craft-bar chain The Brass Tap. 10047 N Dale Mabry Hwy Suite 23, Tampa. 813-969-2337. brasstapbeerbar.com CIGAR CITY BREWING Tampa’s most famous craft brewery. There’s also a taproom at Amalie Arena. 3924 W Spruce St., Tampa. 813-348-6363, cigarcitybrewing.com CLEARWATER BREWING CO. Community-oriented and socially and environmentally conscious. 1700 N Fort Harrison Ave., Clearwater. clearwaterbrewingcompany.com COPPERTAIL BREWING CO. Some of Tampa’s best beer, in one of its best tasting rooms. 2601 E 2nd Ave., Ybor City. 813-247-1500, coppertailbrewing.com COTEE RIVER BREWING Craft beer in the heart of historic downtown New Port Richey. 5760 Main St., New Port Richey. 727-807-6806, coteeriverbrewing.com CRAFT LIFE BREWING Small-batch local brews and a sort of playground for LoL’s craft brewing guild. 4624 Land O’ Lakes Blvd., Land O’ Lakes. 813-575-8440. @ craftlifebrewing on Facebook CROOKED THUMB BREWERY Safety Harbor’s first brewery boasts homegrown flavor, local guest taps and a killer Tuesday songwriters session. 555 10th Ave. S, Safety Harbor. 727-724-5953, crookedthumbbrew.com CUENI BREWING CO. Located off the Pinellas Trail in Dunedin. 945 Huntley Ave., Dunedin. 727266-4102, cuenibrewing.com CYCLE BREWING One of St. Pete’s favorites. 534 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-320-7954. cyclebrewing.com DARWIN BREWING CO. Unique beers crafted with South American influence. 803 17th Ave. W, Bradenton. 941-747-1970, darwinbrewingco.com DE BINE BREWING CO. This addition bolsters the Northern Pinellas craft beer scene. 933 Florida Ave., Palm Harbor, 727-233-7964. DEVIANT LIBATION Latest project from local beer god Tim Ogden housed in the upcoming immersive art collective Crab Devil. 3800 N Nebraska Ave., 727379-4677, devitantlibation.com DISSENT BREWING CO. Unique flavors and adventurous style outside downtown St. Pete. 5518 Haines Rd. N, St. Petersburg. 727-342-0255. DUNEDIN BREWERY Florida’s oldest. Beer, eats and live music. 937 Douglas Ave., Dunedin. 727-736-0606, dunedinbrewery.com DUNEDIN HOUSE OF BEER This beer stop brews its own, and also has 40 guest taps. 927 Broadway, Dunedin. 727 216-6318, dunedinhob.com ESCAPE BREWING CO. Another very worthy OdessaTrinity destination. 9945 Trinity Blvd., Suite 108, Trinity. 727-807-6092, escapebrewingcompany.com FLYING BOAT BREWING COMPANY St. Pete aviation history and tasty homegrown suds. It’s where Tampa fave King State brews its wares. 1776 11th Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-800-2999, flyingboatbrewing.com FOUR STACKS BREWING An always-changing lineup of local and regional guest suds, along with trivia, live music and more. 5469 N. U.S. Hwy-41, Apollo Beach. 813-641-2036, fourstacksbrewing.com GRAND CENTRAL BREWHOUSE 10,270 square-foot brewery, taproom, beer garden, and event venue with a lager-focused tap list. 2340 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-202-6071, grandcentralbrew.com GREEN BENCH BREWING CO. A space worthy of the adventurous beers it produces. 1133 Baum Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-800-9836, greenbenchbrewing.com GOOD LIQUID BREWING CO. 30 taps and food (and a coffee roaster!) from a husband-and-wife duo. 4824 14th St. W, Bradenton. 941-896-6381, thegoodliquidbrewing.com GRINDHAUS BREW LAB Small batches and no extracts. 1650 N Hercules Ave., Clearwater. 727-240-0804, grindhausbrewlab.com GULFPORT BREWERY + EATERY Small batches with an artisanal food menu. 3007 Beach Blvd., Gulfport. 727954-4109, gulfport-brewing.com

HOB BREWING CO. Rotating taps; some of the beers are brewed on-site and alongside a combination of local breweries plus local and international craft beer makers. 931 Huntley Ave., Dunedin. hob.beer IF I BREWED THE WORLD This self-described “mixtape of breweries” offers a bit of everything from the classic to the fun and outrageous. 2200 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-201-4484, ifibrewedtheworld.com IN THE LOOP BREWING Family-friendly Land O’ Lakes brewery with a lot of community support and plenty of events. 3338 Land O’ Lakes Blvd., Land O’ Lakes. 813-997-9189, intheloopbrewingcompany.com INFUSION BREWING CO. Another great location in the good-beer-packed Trinity-New Port Richey area. 7813 Mitchell Blvd. Suite 103, Trinity. 727-312-4512. JDUB’S BREWING CO. You know ‘em, you love ‘em. A favorite statewide phenomenon. 1215 Mango Ave., Sarasota. 941-955-2739, jdubsbrewing.com KING STATE Named the No. 8 coffee shop in America by Food & Wine, King State is also home to brewer and Flying Boat Brewing Co. alum Aric Parker, who’s making some of the cleanest core beers plus a dynamic offering of rotating taps and bomber options available on-site in limited capacities. 520 E Floribraska Ave., Tampa. 813221-2100, king-state.com LAGERHAUS BREWERY & GRILL A Palm Harbor bar and eatery that offers seasonal brews to complement its regulars. 3438 East Lake Business, Palm Harbor. 727-216-9682, lagerhausbrewery.com LATE START BREWING This beloved Tampa label does its thing inside the Pour House. 1208 E. Kennedy Blvd. #112, Tampa. 813-402-2923, latestartbrewing.com LEAVEN BREWING Riverview’s first brewery is run by folks who’ve got experience brewing big and small. 11238 Boyette Rd., Riverview. 813-677-7023, leavenbrewing.com MAD BEACH CRAFT BREWING Brews, ciders, and meads by the beach. 12945 Village Blvd., Madeira Beach. 727-362-0008, madbeachbrewing.com MAGNANIMOUS BREWING In a warehouse a half-block north of I-275, this addition to Tampa’s beer scene provides a large variety to drink in or to go–curbside pickup available. The brewery also serves Ginger Beard coffee when the tasting room is open including a peanut butter oat draft latte. 1410 Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-415-3671, magnanimousbrewing.com MARKER 48 Hernando’s first production craft brewery, with its own tasting room and beer garden 12147 Cortez Blvd, Weeki Wachee. 352-606-2509, marker48.com MASTRY’S BREWING CO. From CD Roma’s restaurant to sweet new digs on St. Pete Beach. 7701 Blind Pass Rd., St. Pete Beach. 727-202-8045, mastrysbrewingco.com MOTORWORKS BREWING A taproom and beer garden featuring full liquor and wine as well as 30 taps. 1014 9th St. W, Bradenton. 941-567-6218, motorworksbrewing.com MR. DUNDERBAK’S The longtime restaurant, biergarten and homebrewers’ hangout is serving its own beers. 14929 Bruce B. Downs Blvd., Tampa. 813-977-4104, dunderbaks.com NAUGHTY MONK BREWERY Naughty Monk brings a love of Belgian styles to Manatee County. 2507 Lakewood Ranch Blvd., Bradenton. 941-708-2966, naughtymonkbrewery.com OVERFLOW BREWING St. Pete’s newest, courtesy of local Rapp head brewer Troy Bledsoe and company. 770 1st Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-914-0665. @overflowbrewingco on Facebook PEPPER BREWING The Angry Pepper Taphouse’s in-house label, available “on a limited basis.” 9366 Oakhurst Rd., Seminole. 727-596-5766, angrypeppertaphouse.com PESKY PELICAN BREW PUB This beachy restaurant also offers its own beers thanks to an in-house nano

system. 923 72nd. St. N, St. Petersburg. 727-302-9600, peskypelicanbrewpub.com PINELLAS ALE WORKS PAW offers a dog-friendly environment in addition to tasty brews. 1962 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-235-0970, pawbeer.com PYE ROAD MEADWORKS Located in Odessa, Pye Road focuses on mead but also keeps beer and wine in house for naysayers of the fermented honey drink. 8533 Gunn Hwy., Odessa. 813-510-3500, pyeroad.com RAPP BREWING CO. The late Greg Rapp’s awardwinning styles are carefully crafted and delicious. 10930 Endeavor Way, Seminole. 727-544-1752, rappbrewing.com RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER This video game-centric Grand Central District craft beer bar started brewing its own in early 2018. 2244 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-360-0766, stpetearcadebar.com ROCK BROTHERS BREWING Brews named for national and local bands have a home in Ybor City. 1901 N. 15th St., Ybor City. 813-241-0110, rockbrothersbrewing.com SARASOTA BREWING CO. House-crafted brews, pizza, and sports out toward beautiful Siesta Key. 6607 Gateway Ave., Sarasota. 941-925-2337, sarasotabrewing.com SILVERKING BREWING CO. This space in Tarpon Springs complements a label that’s been around since 2012. 325 E Lemon St., Tarpon Springs. 727-422-7598, silverkingbrewing.com SIX TEN BREWING A wide variety and a real passion for the craft-brew community. 7052 Benjamin Rd., Tampa. 813-886-0610, sixtenbrewing.com SOGGY BOTTOM BREWING More Dunedin goodness, including some truly original flavors and inventive brews. 660 Main St., Dunedin. 727-601-1698, soggybottombrewing.com SOUTHERN BREWING & WINEMAKING Multiple brews only available in its tasting room, as well as products and guidance for local homebrewers. 4500 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa. 813-238-7800, southernbrewingwinemaking.com ST. PETE BREWING CO. Beers crafted specifically for the climate. 544 1st Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-692-8809, stpetebrewingcompany.com STILT HOUSE BREWERY This friendly Palm Harbor joint specializes in high-ABV ales and other styles you won’t find at other breweries in the area. 625 U.S. Hwy Alt-19, Palm Harbor. 727-270-7373, stilthousebrewery.com SWAN BREWING Nearly 4 decades of combined brewing experience go into the offerings at this pet-friendly joint. Two locations. 2972 Lakeland Highlands Rd./115 W. Pine St., Lakeland. 863-703-0472, swanbrewing.com TBBC Formerly Tampa Bay Brewing Co., local favorite for nearly two decades, with two locations. 1600 E 8th Ave., Ybor City/13933 Monroe’s Business Park, Westchase. 813-247-1422, tbbc.beer TIDAL BREWING COMPANY Small batches in Spring Hill. 14311 Spring Hill Dr., Spring Hill. 352-7011602, tidalbrewingfl.com TWO FROGS BREWING CO. Tarpon Springs’ latest brewery and taproom focuses on American ale styles. 151 E Tarpon Ave., Tarpon Springs. 727-940-6077, @twofrogsbrewing on Facebook KEEL FARMS AGRARIAN ALE + CIDER Tasty brews from the folks behind Keel & Curley winery. 5210 W Thonotosassa Rd., Plant City. 813-752-9100, keelandcurleywinery.com TWO LIONS WINERY & PALM HARBOR BREWERY Wine and beer brewed in-house. 1022 Georgia Ave., Palm Harbor. 727-786-8039, twolionswinery.com ULELE SPRING BREWERY Beer crafted in accordance with traditional Bavarian purity laws. 1810 N Highland Ave., Tampa. 813-999-4952, ulele.com THE WILD ROVER BREWERY What started as an English pub in Odessa is now a higher-production facility in Westchase. 13921 Lynmar Blvd., Tampa. 813-475-5995, thewildroverbrewery.com WOODWRIGHT BREWING CO. Traditional German styles in downtown Dunedin. 985 Douglas Ave., Dunedin. 727-238-8717, @woodwrightbrewing on Facebook WOVEN WATER BREWING CO. Tampa Heights brewer with a focused menu often using fresh fruit as part of its beers. 456 W Columbus Dr., Tampa. 813-443-9463, wovenwaterbrew.com ZEPHYRHILLS BREWING CO. East Paco’s first microbrewery. 38530 5th Ave., Zephyrhills. 813-715-2683, zbcbeer.com ZYDECO BREW WERKS Craft brews in Ybor thanks to an award-winning brewmaster, as well as full bars and NOLA-influenced cuisine. 1902 E 7th Ave., Ybor City. 813252-4541, @zydecobrewwerks on Facebook

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Gio Swaby, My Hands Are Clean 4 (detail), 2017, Thread and fabric sewn on canvas, Collection of Claire Oliver and Ian Rubinstein

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erman playwright Bertolt Brecht, a 20th here, less is more. Give the crowd a chance to Century theatrical giant, saw the writing rest as it settles into the parable. The exaggeraon the wall soon after Adolf Hitler became tions and cartoonish movement that soared in chancellor in 1933. He left Berlin and kicked “Shockheaded Peter” in the larger Jaeb, overaround the capitals of Europe for the rest of the whelm here. Luckily, we quickly move from decade until settling in Helsinki while awaiting burlesque to sharp-edged parody. a U.S. visa. It was there in 1941 that he penned One challenge for an 80-year-old play is that the satire, “The Resistible Rise of Arturo Ui,” a even satirical violence registers differently for a thinly-veiled parable in the guise of a Depression modern audience. We’ve become inured to every era tale with Hollywood gangsters standing in gangster trope. Not only have The Godfather for Nazis as he connects crony capitalism (via and The Sopranos been absorbed into popular the cauliflower trade) and militarism. culture, but we accept ongoing gun violence as Jobsite Theater has mounted a very funny, fast- a given. Sadly, under these circumstances, the as-the-wind production that’s 100 minutes without mounting death toll isn’t visceral, but intellecintermission. Director David Jenkins clearly has tual. Luckily, sometimes it’s so casual as to be an inspired vision for the material and his mirac- humorous. ulous design team Brian Smallhear (scenery), Jo Derrick Phillips (Arturo Ui) has proven himAverill-Snell (lighting), Katrina Stevenson (cos- self an effective/evocative actor in many of our tumes), and Jeremy Douglas (sound) is perfectly local theaters. His Arturo Ui is “a simple son in sync. The staging is simple and fluid, but always of Brooklyn,” but he acknowledges that “I can see ahead.” Unfortunately, striking. Everyone deserves a tip on the hat for attention to he has a happy countenance detail, but Douglas, particuwithout a developing sense larly, has created atmospheric The Resistible Rise of Arturo Ui of menace. I kept expectunderscoring unusual in the ing a burst of unhinged bile Jobsite Theater at Shimberg Playhouse theater that’s consistently David A. Straz Center for the Performing Arts that was never forthcoming. 1010 N Macinnes Pl, Tampa unsettling. One of Brecht’s more Through June 5; $29.50-$39.50 There are 35 characinspired scenes is bringing 813-229-STAR; jobsitetheater.org ters portrayed by eight in a Shakespearean actor actors; nothing is lost by the extremely talented (Ms. Cherry in a green beret) to teach Ui how ensemble (Colleen Cherry, Giles Davies, Spencer to mesmerize a crowd. We see the transformaMeyers, Andresia Moseley, Blake Smallen, tion from awkward pupil to confident con man Katrina Stevenson, and Hugh Timoney). While as he develops the high-kicking goose step and Jenkins has succeeded in creating brilliant the Seig Heil salute while declaiming Marc synchronicity with his designers, his acting Antony. But, now fully-armed as he enters the company of Jobsite stalwarts, while formida- Cauliflower Trust offices, he fails to embody the ble, is just not all in the same play. With these threat his new tools could provide. divergent acting styles, the result is that what At the climax, when we get a full breathis potentially great, ends up merely good. taking historical Hitler image before a giant Brecht begins with a prologue in verse. The microphone, I thought we’d finally arrive at an actors are larger than life, the movement is car- unhinged crescendo—a Reichstag moment of toonish and in your face. Because the space is full barking insanity and demagoguery. Alas, spare, there’s a slight reverb in the Shimberg we never get the demented terror that would which initially competes with Douglas’s oompah put an exhilarating exclamation point before underscoring driven by pizzicato strings. It’s the epilogue. And the final transition to the not necessary to exaggerate here. Stylization Brechtian admonishment that follows is over doesn’t demand declamation; so much is going before we know it. on at times that the audience may feel assaulted. Still, you’ll come away from this entertainPerhaps that’s the intent, but it seems to me that ing gangster vaudeville knowing, as Jenkins

FAST COMPANY: In Jobsite’s latest, 35 characters are portrayed by eight actors. reminds in his director’s note, that “democracy is complicated, ugly, and difficult. It’s also precious and incredibly fragile.” It’s our personal responsibility to stand up to the political con men in our midst. Authoritarians are watching closely to see if there are significant consequences for the Jan. 6 insurrection, one of the

darkest days in our history that too many wish to sweep under the rug. We have our own Orbáns, Le Pens, Erdogans and Putins with their eyes on 2024. The survival of our democracy is up to you. Brecht’s epilogue cautions “though we managed to stop the bastard, the bitch that bore him is in heat again.”

cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 39

40 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

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SHOW PREVIEW Phoebe Bridgers w/Charlie Hickey

Tuesday, May 24. 7 p.m. Sold out. Cuban Club, 2010 N Avenida Republica de Cuba, Ybor City. cubanclubybor.com

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MUSIC WEEK

I’m dead

Some ghosts Phoebe Bridgers should visit before her show in Tampa. By Gabrielle Reeder

First stop: Oaklawn Cemetery (1.3 miles from venue) Oaklawn—founded in 1850 as a public cemetery and located at 606 E Harrison St. in downtown Tampa—serves as the final resting place for James Cooley Field. To get there from the Cuban Club, you’ll walk by José Martí Park and the Sociedad La Union Marti Maceo (a club built for Black Cubans forced into segregation), by the demolished Tampa Park apartments and through The Scrub, one of Tampa’s historic Black neighborhoods all but obliterated in the name of “urban renewal” (at least the St. James Episcopal Church is being restored). Scott Street (!!) will take you to Oaklawn. Field, who’s buried in section five, was a commercial

photographer known for capturing cityscapes in Tampa during the 1890s; the lyrics to “Moon Song” compare quite literally to his experience. At its core, the tune delves into a one-sided romantic relationship; Bridgers strives to do the utmost for a partner who pays very little attention to the effort, crooning, “you might be dying, but you’re holding me like water in your hands.” Fields uprooted his life to move to Tampa because his wife had become ill with tuberculosis, a disease that would kill her and their daughter. In a way, he tried to give his wife the moon while

OLOF GRIND

ender and sprinkled with death, Phoebe Bridgers’ output features seemingly gloomy tracks about the impact of love, plus wise meditations on growing up, alcoholism and atheism all driven by an undeniable undercurrent of joy. The public has found a lot of that joy and also grown fond of the 27-year-old’s habit of adorning garments with skeletons on them—be they Thom Browne suits or Lifer dresses. Her band’s onstage uniform at Coachella was skeletons, and fans can expect to see those bones again when the Grammynominee heads to Ybor City for a gig in support of second solo album Punisher (her fourth release and). The show—which sold out of 4,000 tickets the minute it went on sale—is big jump from her 2017 Bay area debut at Gasparilla Music Festival where she played for less than 200 folks in the Kiley Garden Amphitheatre. Bridgers, boss at Saddest Factory Records founded last fall, spends countless hours on a tour bus but tries to maintain some semblance of a routine. In 2020, she told Rolling Stone about her fondness for walking. Well, Tampa has some skeletons of its own (we’re not talking about City Hall), and you’ll have to hoof it to find them. To welcome her into our haunted city and complement her deep explorations into the human psyche—and, of course, her cute little ghost mascot—Creative Loafing Tampa Bay tapped into some Punisher lyrics for an on-foot tour of haunted places in Ybor City, Tampa Heights and downtown. Find a mobile ready for this walking tour via cltampa.com/music.

now a cigar bar, or by the old pump house turned restaurant at Water Works Park) to Woodlawn, where several prominent Tampeños are buried. In the ‘30s and ‘40s, traveling circuses entertained thousands upon thousands. The modern circus is slightly evolved, focusing less on gawkmaterial and more on talent, but back then, circuses were largely made up of those who had bodily abnormalities. Born with ectrodactyly, the condition caused the bones in Stiles’ hands and feet to fuse together, giving him his Lobster Boy nickname. In Bridgers’ “Punisher,” an ode dedicated to arguably her most inspiring musical influence, Elliott Smith, she sings, “What if I told you that I feel like I know you, but we never met.” Although Bridgers never met Smith, her music bears the same brooding DNA and metaphorical flourishes.

I KNOW THE END: Phoebe Bridgers plays a sold-out show at Ybor City’s Cuban Club on Tuesday. she was dying, but shortly after their relocation, she passed. Cooley’s inability to cope led him to sell the photography company and buy a pub; he peddled liquor until he was arrested for selling alcohol illegally. Second stop: Showmen’s Rest (2.6 miles from venue) Showmen’s Rest—2.3 miles from Oaklawn—is a small subsection of Tampa Heights’ Woodlawn cemetery located at 3412 N Ola Ave. where circus performers and carnival workers rest. Grady Stiles III, better known as Lobster Boy, is there. To get to him from Oaklawn, walk through Tampa Heights (with the option detour and to visit one of the neighborhood’s oldest churches, which is

Lobster Boy was and still is an American sensation. Even though he was murdered in 1992, he is a mainstay in modern media, including the 2014 series “American Horror Story: Freak Show” which based its character Jimmy Darling off Stiles’ story. The cult classic normalized his appearance. “Hear so many stories of you at the bar, most times alone but some of them looking your worst,” Phoebe sings on “Punisher.” While Lobster Boy grew up a revered and lonely circus act, he soon married then turned to alcohol. Bridgers lovingly explains how Smith was always sweet to the “trust funds” and “punishers,” fans who are well-off and talkative, respectively. Lobster Boy, on the other hand, was not so nice

and was pretty much just at his worst at the end; he regularly beat and abused his wife and kids and even murdered his daughter’s fiance. Final destination: The Cuban Club The ideal place to end up is 2010 N Avenida Republica de Cuba. Although it’s not a cemetery, the Cuban Club is haunted with ghosts and supernatural spirits—perfect for Bridgers’ aesthetic. To get back there, head east, past Robles Park (maybe get a coffee at King State or Black Radish?) and through Ybor City. “I grew up here til it all went up in flames, except the notches on the door frame,” she sings in “Garden Song,” the opening salvo on Punisher. While Phoebe describes her journey growing up and watching her house burn down, but not losing the growth accompanied with it, the lyrics closely compare to the club’s history. The first Cuban Club was called “El Circulo Cubano” (“Circle of Cubans”) and served as a community space for immigrants from the Caribbean nation. The wooden clubhouse burned down in 1916; workers rebuilt the building with bricks a year later and renamed it, acknowledging the past. Garden Song continues with, “Everything is growing in our garden, you don’t have to know that it’s haunted.” And when you come to a concert, you, too, may not know that there are four ghosts who primarily haunt the property, according to Paul Guzzo who tried—and failed—to spend a night at the Cuban Club last year. There’s an actor who, back in the ‘20s, forgot his lines and proceeded to kill himself onstage, a board member who was shot in the face and “a woman in a white gown and red shoes who was pushed from a balcony onto the road when she refused to dance with a man.” One of the most genial hauntings at the club is Little Jimmy, who was eight or nine when he went for a swim in the Cuban Club pool without a lifeguard, drowned and died. The pool became the ground floor cantina, but locals and visitors claim to notice Little Jimmy’s presence through flashlight flickers; spectators sometimes spot him in pictures. On “Savior Complex” Bridgers says, “All the skeletons you hide, show me yours.” The song inherently focuses on one person’s strong-willed desire to save another, but parallels Jimmy’s story in a more light-hearted fashion. Perhaps Jimmy makes his presence known because he did not have much support when he was alive. He did go for a swim alone after all. Since Jimmy still communicates with us, perhaps we are his savior complex, and maybe he’ll be at the show, too.

cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 43

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THU 19

Candlebox Creative Loafing Tampa Bay adverts from 1996 feature shows by Candlebox which is still on the road nearly 30 years later, this time promoting Wolves, its first album since 2016. Standing room tickets are still available at Tampa’s Hard Rock Event Center. (Hard Rock Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Tampa) C Halsey w/Beabadoobee/ PinkPantheress Halsey recently told fans about a laundry list of ailments and allergies including Ehlers-Danlos and Sjogren’s syndromes (and they’re allergic to coffee), but assured followers it won’t put a damper on a tour that starts in Florida this week. All good news, and even better is the addition of beabadoobee—a Filipino bedroom pop star who just played Coachella—to the bill. (MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa)

FRI 20

C The Head And The Heart w/Jade Bird For the last month, it’s been very Blue in the Head and the Heart camp. That’s when the L.A. indie-folk band released its latest album, Every Shade of Blue,dropped and a month before this kickoff for a tour that’ll keep the band on the road for the next two-and-a-halfmonths. Powerhouse U.K. songwriter Jade Bird opens. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg) Sarah Reeves w/Clark Beckham Sick of the contemporary sounds of mainstream Jesus music? Sarah Reeves has your back. The 33-year-old’s five albums have the same computerized vibes as her friends Kirk Franklin and Brandon Lake, but not everything she does musically is for religious purposes. Reeves’ stuff has appeared in promos for Disney+ and “American Idol,” and you have your chance to hear said endeavors when she plays an intimate Ybor City listening room show alongside actual “Idol” contestant Clark Beckham. (The Attic at Rock Brothers Brewing Co., Ybor City) Streetcar Live: Whale Feral Tampa’s Streetcar Live series usually happens when temperatures drop, but when you take two years off due to the pandemic, you come back no matter how sweaty your crotch is going to get. This free concert from Florida southern jam band and Relix magazine favorite Whale Feral is a one-off summer streetcar show appetizer ahead of a full fall schedule which will find concertgoers taking a free ride aboard the ridiculously popular TECO Streetcar which leaves Ybor City’s Centennial Park Station at 6 p.m. Look for specific streetcar number information via @gasparillamusicfestival on Facebook. (Centennial Park, Ybor City)

SAT 21

C Front Line Assembly w/Rein It will be 36 years of industrial-strength electrobliss going from the stage and into your ears when Front Line Assembly stabs its staccatos into the band’s first Tampa show since 2017. The Vancouver EBM fave is on “The Mechanical Soul Tour” with the current lineup featuring founder and former Skinny Puppy member Bill Leeb, Rhys Fulber (also of Delerium), Mankind drummer and keyboardist Jon Siren, and Tim Skold (KMFDM, Marilyn Manson). Since last playing the area, FLA (ironic acronym?) has released other fulllengths, including the 2018 soundtrack for “WarMech,” 2019’s Wake Up in the Coma and 2021’s Mechanical Soul, which features JeanLuc de Meyer of Front 242 and Dino Cazares from Fear Factory. Sweden’s Rein and her pulsating EBM sound play support with the Tampa Bay-area’s funky electronic-industrialized Pressure Kitten and DJ Veine spinning the energy between acts (Orpheum, Ybor City)—Paul Catala Kane Brown w/Walker Hayes/RaeLynn It’s pretty remarkable to think that only six years ago, “One Right Thing” star Kane Brown was performing at Tampa’s 300-capacity Dallas Bull, hoping to make a much bigger name for himself. Years later, he and his wife just had their second child right before New Year’s, and he’s evolved into a household name. Joining the 28-year-old is Nashville-based country sensation Walker Hayes, as well as Texas singer-songwriter RaeLynn. (Amalie Arena, Tampa) Lil Tecca w/BabySantana/Bktherula/ yvngxchris Tecca’s Florida debut was supposed to go off in March, but for reasons

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unknown—likely due to the Omicron wave— the show was delayed. Luckily, none of the support acts originally announced pulled out, and you’ve had more time to indulge yourself in Tecca’s latest album, We Love You Tecca 2. BabySantana, Bktherula, and yvngxchris remain on the bill this weekend. (The Ritz, Ybor City)

THE JIMMYS + JOSH NELMS & TC CARR

C Have Gun, Will Travel’s End of the World Music Festival: Lauren Morrow w/Lauris Vidal/Hymn For Her/Liam Bauman/Deb Ruby/Taylor Raynor The irony of the End of the World Music Festival taking two years off as the world almost literally burned away is not lost on us, but we’re glad to see the shindig return and make its way back to Skipper’s which had its own post-corona resurrection last summer. The gig kicks off at 5 p.m. and features close friends and acquaintances of Have Gun, Will Travel—one of Tampa’s most revered Americana bands—plus newer songwriters still making their way. Most notable is Whiskey Gentry frontwoman Lauren Morrow who’s been performing under her own name lately in support of a classic country sound with lyrics that can turn from tender like a kiss on the cheek to a straight gonad kick in a dime. (Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa)

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continued on page 46

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continued from page 45 his songwriting catalog for $300 million earlier this year is his son, Joe Sumner, who plays bass in rock group Fiction Plane. Tickets are long sold-out, and started at $250 when they went on sale. Real classy for an ex-English teacher, huh? (Hard Rock Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Tampa)

97X Craft Experience: Giovannie & The Hired Guns Get ready to two-step because Giovannie & the Hired Guns have sandwiched a Tampa Bay stop in between appearances at Jacksonville’s Welcome to Rockville and Chicago’s Lollapalooza. The Tejano five-piece plays a country-fied brand of rock and roll with just some headbanging sprinkled in, which it will bring to 97X WSUN-FM’s “Craft Experience.” Natives of Stephenville, Texas, the band—led by Giovannie Yanez—is touring in advance of a new album, Tejano Punk Boys, due in July. (Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg) Fantastical Tigers w/Deb Ruby/ Emily Turnage/Melissa Grady/Daniel Caballero This year didn’t start off easily for Fantastical Tigers. After six months of collaborations, Jordan Chronister and his wife, Lindsey Rae Washburn cut all ties with local collective Wave Theory. The split came ahead of April sexual harassment allegations against Wave Theory’s defacto leader Mike Mass, and Chronister told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the band would have cut ties sooner had they known about the incident which allegedly occured two years ago. Since the split, the band moved forward by joining Tampa’s own Symphonic Distribution, and this weekend, Fantastical Tigers will perform its recentlyreleased eponymous album, cover to cover. Supporting the duo are fellow local singersongwriter favorites Deb Ruby and Emily Turnage, along with special appearances from Melissa Grady of Same Day Delivery Orchestra, and Daniel Caballero, of House of I. (Floridian Social Club, St. Petersburg) C Give the Drummer Some! A DrumCentric Benefit for Pat Close: New Groove City w/Dave Reinhardt Trio/ Acme Jazz Garage Much-loved Bay area drummer Pat Close needs an extra helping of love. He’s fighting pancreatic cancer, so the local music community, especially jazz-oriented players, have come together to throw a benefit. Acts on the bill, which runs from 3 p.m.-6 p.m., are: New Groove City, which features world-class percussionist Gumbi Ortiz and Luis Alicea, both of whom have toured with fusion guitarist Al Di Meola; the Dave Reinhardt Trio, with guitarist LaRue Nickelson and bassist Tim George; and the funky, Latin-y, hard-to-categorize Acme Jazz Garage, of which Close is a member. Close has also performed with Larry Coryell, Brian Bromberg, Kenny Drew Jr., Richard Elliot and others. Two members of AJG—guitarist Matt Swenson and bassist Philip Booth—put together the benefit, with help from the Tampa Jazz Club and other people, organizations and stores. Tickets are $20. And feel free to drop a little extra bread into the event’s GoFundMe page. (Mainstage Theater at Hillsborough Community College, Ybor City)—Eric Snider

46 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

FRANK OCKENFELS

SUN 22

Charlie Hickey

Laxmikant-Pyrarelal Orchestra The duo made up of veteran music composer Pyarelal Ramprasad Sharma (aka Pyarelal) and the late Laxmikant Shantaram Patil Kudalkar is a giant in Bollywood circles, and its music lives on thanks to the Laxmikant-Pyarelal Orchestra. A press release promises “a lifetime and an unforgettable night of classic Bollywood movie songs,” including those from Bollywood blockbusters like “Suhaag,” “Vakil Babu,” “Dostana,” “Adha Din Adhi Raat,” “Loha” and “Anhonee.” Bollywood singers— including Zeenat Aman, Padmini Kolhapure and Rati Agnihotri—will also be on hand and backed by world class musicians at the show. (Yuengling Center at University of South Florida, Tampa)

MON 23

Stryper Ever since a 1985 stop at Jacksonville’s Florida Theatre, the state’s realest and fakest Christians alike have been packing local theaters and nightclubs to catch Stryper live on a practically annual basis. Even after having to wait over a decade for the group to be—err, born again—there’s not an end in sight, especially considering the fact that Stryper recently put out its lockdown masterpiece, Even The Devil Believes, which you just might get to hear on Monday. After years of playing in Florida, this will mark the first time that the group behind “To Hell With The Devil” rocks Clearwater. Watch for

Scientologists! (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater)

TUE 24

C Phoebe Bridgers w/Charlie Hickey For a long time, Charlie Hickey was a constant presence on the Instagram stories posted by Phoebe Bridgers and her drummer Marshall Vore who frequently had the young Los Angeles songwriter in his studio. Lately, however, the 21-year-old has enjoyed the kind of critical praise Bridgers—now technically his boss since he’s signed to her Saddest Factory record label—was the center of during her own rise. Outfits like NPR, Fader, Nylon, MTV and Flood have all heaped approval on Hickey’s work, with Consequence saying that one single, “No Good At Lying,” is the work of someone “wise beyond Hickey’s years.” The show happens three days before Hickey— whose voice is one of the most unique among the latest batch of new indie-folk songsmiths—releases his debut full-length, Nervous At Night. Read CL's preview of the show on p. 43. (Cuban Club, Ybor City) T-Pain w/Erica Banks/Young Cash/Mason Dane T-Pain wants to buy you a drink and play games with you for the auto-tune rap pioneer's “Road To Wiscansin” tour. A press release says the 37-year-old, Tallahassee-born six-time Grammy winner will be traveling the country in a customized school bus turned “Nappy Boy Gaming” center featuring a bar on one side and a gaming center on the other.

Only meet and greet ticket holders will be able to hop on to play games and drink with T-Pain. (The Ritz, Ybor City)

WED 25

Dave Matthews Band Like clockwork, Dave Matthews Band (DMB)is back for its annual Tampa show. DMB hasn’t put out a new album since 2018’s Come Tomorrow, but that hasn’t stopped fans from strapping on their Birkenstocks and faithfully attending shows year in and year out. A press release says the band is also planting 1 million trees in 2022, and asking attendees to pitch in by adding a $2 donation to the ticket price. Pretty cool, considering DMB is still outrunning the memory of that time its tour bus dumped a bunch of poop on people. (MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa)

THU 26

C Wallows w/Jordana It’s unreal to think that the last time Wallows came around here, it rocked a very sold-out gig at The Ritz Ybor. Two years, one studio album, and one pandemic later, the Los Angeles trio is set to take on a venue on the other side of the Bay. All we need now is a 2023 GMF set from Wallows, on any stage, really. Self-described “indie rock pop sweet-hawt” Jordana opens. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

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RENELL MEDRANO

At this very moment, hip-hop fans across the world are probably listening to two albums released last Friday: Kendrick Lamar’s double-LP, Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers and Finally, New by Tampa Bay’s own They Hate Change. Local fans already got a chance to see Change two weeks ago, but Lamar—who won a Pulitzer for his last studio album, DAMN.—also has plans to play Tampa Bay this summer. Tickets to see Kendrick Lamar play Tampa’s Amalie Arena on Wednesday, July 27 go on sale Friday, May 20 at noon. A CashApp customer presale happens on Thursday, May 19 at 10 a.m. Tickets start at $59. The only other Florida show is on July 24 at Rolling Loud in Miami, and depending on proximity clauses in the contracts of Rolling Loud artists, Lamar’s Tampa stop could be full of surprise guests. Lamar’s cousin Baby Keem, who just played St. Petersburg in March, will open the show along with Tanna Leone, who recently signed to Lamar’s pgLang imprint. Cornrow Kenny last played Amalie Arena when he headlined in 2017 and opened for Kanye West in 2013. He also headlined an all-star tour that stopped at MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre in 2018.—Ray Roa The Smashing Pumpkins and Jane’s Addiction will play Tampa together this fall Two of the most prominent rock bands from the ‘90s will come together this fall for a tour that’s headed to Tampa. Tickets to see The

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A: It’s not clear, is it? People of every income level, race, gender, sexuality, and religion think about suicide. The Crisis Center of Tampa Bay is the community’s gateway to help, hope and healing. Last year alone, we assisted over 5,000 callers struggling with thoughts of suicide.

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Finding hope By Caroline DeBruhl

ately, I’ve been feeling what might be called “overwhelming despair.” It started out on Monday, May 2, with the Supreme Court leak and has compounded from there. It’s not the only thing I’m feeling, of course. “Rage” and “exhaustion” are also peppered in, as is “profound hopelessness.” I’ve used this column before to ask the cards a political question as the insurrection was happening on live TV. But that moment felt something akin to 9/11, a tragedy that everyone was feeling. I’m writing this column a week after the leak, which is no longer front-page news. The dismantling of the right to medical privacy and bodily autonomy for women (as well as everyone who can get pregnant) doesn’t seem to be making as big of a splash, which feeds into my worry that, at best, people (particularly men) are indifferent and worst, that they’re OK with it. I wondered if I drew cards for this situation, would any of the men who read this column care? Would those indifferent simply skip this week? They might. I don’t know. But I decided to draw cards because I needed to. This is a situation that is depressing me. It’s also depressing for my mother and my sister, currently eight months pregnant with my niece. It’s depressing to my friends who want children and those who don’t, to my queer women and non-binary friends who worry about their bodily autonomy and marriages. They, too, are filled with rage and exhaustion, and despair. So I did a iagnostic spread, pulling three sets of three cards, plus two for advice, asking: Where do we go from here?

The second set was the Ten of Wands (rev.), Knight of Wands, and Justice (reversed) Ten of wands, a terrible burden to bear. Justice reversed, a long time before justice is felt. That’s the burden we carry. However, the Knight of Wands is another court card that can represent both sides of this push. Wands are a fire suit, filled with passion and determination and somewhat feral. The Knight of Wands goes for the throat. Many women have fought for years, with a single burning passion, to stop the overturning of Roe v. Wade, and there are many women with that same passion who worked tirelessly to overturn it. The Knight of Wands may be how we got here in the first place, but it can also be how we get justice in the end.

The first set was The Hierophant, Three of Wands, and Page of Wands (all reserved) A bleak but straightforward cluster. The Hierophant is institutions, holy orders, and courts. The Three of Wands is building on/ reflecting on the past as you go forward. The highest court of the land plans to flip a 49-yearold precedent, stripping the past decision and thus blocking a future to be built on it. The Page of Wands is a curious court card because it symbolizes many things related to this decision. It can mean literal youth (such as a child) but can also be naiveté and child-like emotions (like tantrums). The Page of Wand in my deck is adorned with protective symbols because this Page is someone who can both find themselves in danger and be the spark of that danger. Young women are indeed put in jeopardy by this decision. But the judges driving this decision don’t seem to realize that they are the dangerous ones.

The last set was the bleakest looking of the lot: The Empress (reversed), Eight of Swords, and Three of Swords (reversed) The Empress, the earthly symbol of motherhood and self-governing women, is paired with the thrice-stabbed bleeding heart of the Three of Swords. Shit is heartbreaking for women and mothers who want to control their bodies. The Eight of Swords adds to the miserable pileon by being a card of depression and feeling completely trapped. But, as I’ve written here before, the Eight of Swords is also an illusion. So there is a way out if you can figure it out. This brings me to the two cards advising what to do next: Nine of Wands and Page of Cups The Nine of Wands is certainly a card for the exhausted; it is a card that comes up after a long struggle. But it’s also the last torch of hope, a card that can mean a breakthrough or a positive change, often from a shift in perspective or tactic. The Page of Cups is another youthful court card, born from the Mystery-waters of Psyche, and is one of deep emotion, creative thinking, and great empathy. While the wands are considered a masculine suit (as are swords, re: penis-shaped), the cups are feminine. They represent the strength of emotions and wisdom of the psyche. They are water to the fire of the wands. With all the fire and air of the wands and swords in this spread, the way out is water. While we will need that fire of passion to keep us going (Nine of Wands), it is the feminine Page of Cups, with their creativity, empathy, and maybe psychic prowess, that will figure out how to break out of that sword fence. How will that work? I’m not sure. Care networks, like those that existed in the 20th century before Roe, come to mind. So does

UPSIDEDOWNCAKE/ADOBE

ORACLE OF YBOR

midwifery, which, by the way, if you wonder how “the farmers” would have viewed abortion, check out the diary of Martha Ballard, published as “A Midwife’s Tale” and annotated by Laurel Thatcher Ulrich. (Spoiler: widely practiced and without shame.) I don’t know what the answer is, but I’m grateful the cards suggested that there might

be one at all. When gloom shrouds the soul, it cuts off all light, but seeing those cards helped spark a little flame of hope in me. If you have been despairing, I hope that flame catches on to you, too. Send your questions for the Oracle to oracle@ cltampa.com or DM @theyboracle on Instagram.

cltampa.com | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | 51

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Freyed nerves By Dan Savage

I am a 37-year-old heterosexual woman in a monogamous relationship with a het cis male. Let’s call him “Rick.” We’ve been together for five years and engaged for two. Our sex went from passionate, fun, and frequent early in the relationship to nearly nonexistent now. I have gently initiated conversations about how to spice it up—sexy dates, sex toys, new positions, even non-monogamy—but Rick never took me up on any of my suggestions. I encouraged him to get bloodwork done, thinking maybe it was a decline in testosterone or something. I loved him and was legitimately concerned. I also made the pact with myself that I could live with only having sex 4-5 times a year because Rick brought so much “good” to the table. Outside of sex, our relationship is supportive, positive, and fun. Fast forward: I recently learned that Rick has a profile on an online dating app. We are not in an open relationship, even though I’d offered that as a possible solution to our sex woes. After some mild questioning, his story unraveled. He admitted to exchanging sexy pics and videos with more than 20 women on the internet over the last few years. He was apparently going into our spare bedroom or bathroom to make and send these videos—sometimes when I was home, sometimes when I was waiting in bed for him. After talking with a friend, she confided in me that Rick’s ex had discovered dozens of sexting convos on Rick’s phone with strangers when they were together. My questions are both general and specific to me. First, is it possible for someone to be incapable of physical intimacy when there is love involved? I’m no expert, but it strikes me as troubling that Rick can’t make love with me—going so far as to blame it on hormonal shifts—when it’s not biological at all; he just prefers to jerk off with strangers. Is this actually a thing? Only being physically attracted to an anonymous, impersonal, meaningless stranger? My next question is: Is there hope for a future with Rick when he is lying to me—a GGG partner who wanted to work through this—and also lying to himself? I think I know the answer, but: am I better off alone?—Sick Of Rick’s Dick Image Doings

to fuck me (because he respected me too much) or being fucked by a man like that (because he didn’t respect me at all). On the flip side, there are straight women who seem to have husbandmaterial complexes. There are guys they can see themselves married to and possibly having kids with—husband material, e.g., good, kind, reliable guys—but those aren’t the men they’re excited about fucking. Instead, it’s bad, unkind, unreliable guys that turn these women on. Oh, and there’s a new type of long-term, committed, romantic partner out there who doesn’t wanna fuck people they love: freysexuals. A freysexual may love their romantic partner and wanna marry that person and make a life with them, SORDID, but a freysexual doesn’t wanna and/or can’t fuck someone they have strong and/or any feelings for. Basically, love is erotic kryptonite to the freysexual. Being freysexual doesn’t excuse your fiancé’s dishonesty, SORDID, assuming he is freysexual. Simply put, if your fiancé is freysexual and knew that about himself—even if he didn’t know there was a word/bespoke sexual orientation for him— he should’ve disclosed that to you. And if he only just realized it, he should’ve accepted your invitation to renegotiate the terms of your commitment, i.e., take you up on your offer to have an ethically non-monogamous relationship. (For the record: I’m not suggesting that freysexuality isn’t a legitimate sexual orientation—freysexuals already have their own pride flag, and we all know how high that bar is— but I am suggesting freysexuals shouldn’t make sexually-excusive commitments to romantic partners or demand sexually-exclusive commitments from romantic partners.) Whatever the deal is with your fiancé, SORDID, weddings are not famous for reviving sexually moribund relationships. So, if you want more than supportive, positive, and fun vibes from your future husband—if you want regular and decent sex on top of all that—don’t marry this guy. But if the idea of being in a companionate marriage with this man appeals to you, SORDID, that’s something you should explore with the help of a couples’ counselor. Oh, and if sexting women he barely knows is his primary sexual interest and outlet, SORDID, your fiancé already opened your relationship— on his end. There’s no reason you should have to wait to open it on your end.

SAVAGE LOVE

Yes, SORDID, some people are incapable of being physically intimate when love is involved. There are straight men out there with what’s called Madonna-whore complexes; these men can’t make love with and/or fuck women they love and respect. These men view sex as dirty and degrading, and they don’t wanna do dirty and degrading things with (or to) women they have feelings for. Frankly, I don’t know what would be worse: being married to man that refused

My partner and I recently bought a bar in a small town, far from the city we’d lived in, which has been both fun and challenging. Anyway, a couple started coming in and quickly became very talkative about their personal situation. She’s a straight-presenting women, he’s a bisexual man, they have an open relationship. At first I thought, OK, great. It’s a small community, and I’m glad they feel comfortable being themselves in our place. But their behavior has rapidly escalated, however, to the man making comments to staff members that are inappropriate, ranging from crude come-ons to telling one all about how ugly and weird his own dick is. I’m guessing that shaming himself like that is a kink for him. But we don’t want to hear his confessions. I need to address it, but I wanted some advice as to how. Shutting down garden-variety horny cis guys is something I have decades of experience with, but I wonder if I should be more delicate here, given their situation. I don’t want anyone to think we are biased, but this behavior is not acceptable, and I need to protect my staff.—Boundaries And Respectful Treatment Escape Numbskull Dumbasses P.S. Public Service Announcement: Bartenders are not sex workers. It is lazy and exhausting for people to assume that just because someone’s job is serving and entertaining you, that they also are game for fucking you or your partner or both of you or you and your friends. Double shame on the ones who also hold a gratuity hostage while you politely rebuff them. It happens a lot and needs to stop. I’m guessing these people started coming into your bar after you bought it, BARTEND,

because the previous owners 86ed them years ago. And I predict their bad behavior is going to escalate the longer you hesitate to 86 these motherfuckers yourself. I’m a 31-year-old straight woman with a quick question. I’ve been in an on-and-off-again

relationship with a man since I was 18 years old. I’ve gotten more comfortable dating other men when we’re not “on.” We were “off” for the last year and I had an absolute ball. However, we got back together recently. The problem is my partner seems insecure suddenly and is constantly worried he’s not big enough. He sometimes even half jokes about getting surgery to make his dick bigger. The other night out of the blue he said, “So, since you’re a lot more experienced now, bigger is better, right?” I don’t like this. Honestly, his new insecurities are making me feel less attracted to him and I’m starting to feel like we’ve hit a dead end in our relationship. Is this a sign that we should just break up?—Completely Over Comparisons, Kapisce? It’s either an annoying insecurity you won’t be able to put up with, COCK, or your on-andoff-again boyfriend is fumbling the disclosure of a kink. Sometimes when people want to tell their partner about a kink—a long-standing kink or a recently-surfaced one—they’ll frame it negatively. They’ll point to a “crazy” porn clip they stumbled over or share a “gross” story about something a friend did, COCK, in the hopes that their partner will say, “Hey, I don’t think that’s crazy or gross, I think that’s hot!” Since people tend to mirror the attitudes of important people in their lives, and since there’s no more important person than a romantic partner, disclosing kinks like this—framing them negatively so you can deny any interest when your partner invariably reacts negatively—is a terrible strategy. Anyway, your boyfriend is either bringing up his anxiety about the bigger dicks you had during your last “off,” COCK, because he’s desperately insecure and needs constant reassurance that he’s not inadequate or because it turns him on to think about you being with men with bigger cocks and longs to be told that he is inadequate. To figure out what your boyfriend’s issue actually is here—intolerable insecurity, eroticized insecurity—ask him a direct question: “You ask about other men with bigger dicks a lot. Does it turn you on to think about that?” If the answer is yes, COCK, you might be able to make that work; a little dirty talk during sex about bigger guys you’ve been with, maybe a hall pass to go get some bigger dick once in a while. If the answer is no, tell him one last time that you’ve been with some bigger guys, yes, but you like his dick just fine, and you don’t want to talk about it anymore. If he refuses to stop bringing it up, then it’s off again. Send mail to questions@savagelove.net, listen to Savage Lovecast, and follow @FakeDanSavage on Twitter. Get columns, podcasts, books, merch and more at savage.love.

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54 | MAY 19 - 25, 2022 | cltampa.com

creative loafing puzzler

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