Creative Loafing Tampa — January 6, 2022 by Chava Communications

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If you’re like us, then you’ve already binged all eight episodes.

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf STAFF WRITER Justin Garcia FOOD and THEATER CRITIC Jon Palmer Claridge FILM & TV CRITIC John Allman NETFLIX

IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Lee Devito, Kyla Fields, Jeff Houck, Alexandria Jones, Stephanie Powers, Dan Savage

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All the Tampa Bay locations featured in Netflix’s ‘Selling Tampa,’ p. 26.

PHOTOGRAPHERS Sandra Döhnert, Gabby Santos

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EDITORIAL INTERN Apply for fall via

rroa@cltampa.com SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping Jack wild Spatafora CREATIVE DIRECTOR d dangerous. But even though public ILLUSTRATORS Joe Newton, Dan Perkins, atmany SeaWorld animal rights don’t in seeFebruary, a parallel between the kind Cory Robinson , claiming the practice of keeping wild k and the practice of displaying animals nd dangerous. even though public ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES asking forSENIOR tooBut much? Or is it time for a Anthony Carbone, Scottthe Zepeda d, many don’t see a parallel between kind t” animals?

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BECAUSE I GOT GLASSES Everything looked crystal clear for the ﬁrst time in years. I needed reading glasses as an adult, and they have helped me continue to reach thousands of parents and families in Tampa Bay through "Tampa Bay Parenting Magazine." Annual eye exams are now a part of my family’s schedule, and I hope more kids don’t have to wait until adulthood to get proper eye care. The Glazer Vision Foundation provides children in need with free glasses, changing how they see the world.

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Con comics

Spend some time with comic book nerds this weekend. By Kyla Fields

or years, St. Pete cosplay enthusiasts, comic fans and weebs alike had to travel to Tampa— and sometimes to smaller cities in Florida—to partake in conventions and celebrations. But those days are in the past, as the first St. Petersburg Comic Con happens Jan. 8-9 at The Coliseum. Downtown St. Pete’s Coliseum usually hosts jazz concerts or business expos, but during the first weekend of the new year, it will be jampacked with all things anime, sci-fi, fantasy and cosplay. “It’s long past time for St. Petersburg, a world-wide destination city, to have a highend, annual comic convention,” said Dewey Caruthers, who is organizing the con with his teenage daughters Blu and Scarlet. St. Petersburg’s debut Comic Con will feature a wide variety of panels, competitions, meetand-greets and exhibitions, ranging from Sailor Moon Jeopardy and light saber training, to “Cosplay Q&A: Ask the Experts”—a panel highlighting some of the best cosplayers in Florida. Single day passes run for $20, while a weekend pass is only $10 more. You can also scoop weekend VIP tickets for $100, which gets you early access to the convention, a goody bag and entry into a VIP after party. Kids 9 years old and under get in free, but they do still need a ticket. For all ticketing information, visit stpete. floridacomiccons.com. Artists featured in the upcoming Comic-Con include voice actors Erica Schroeder, known for her work on “Pokemon,” “Sonic the Hedgehog” and “Yu-Gi-Oh,” and Mike McFarland, who voices characters on “Dragon Ball,” “Attack

on Titan,” and “Fullmetal Alchemist.” Alex Saviuk—the man behind works like Superman and The Flash—is among the few comic artists also featured at St. Pete’s Comic Con. There will also be cosplay competitions each night, and its winners might get a feature in the Florida Cosplay Digital Magazine, among cash and other prizes. Caruthers and his daughters— event organizers and self-identified “local nerd family”— encourage anyone who is remotely interested in cosplay, comics or science fiction to come out and enjoy the Sunshine City’s first ever Comic Con. St. Petersburg Comic Con. Sat.-Sun., Jan. 8-9. $20 & up. The Coliseum. 535 4th Ave. N, St. Petersburg. stpete.floridacomiccons.com Summer time Do you ever wish musicals sounded less like a bunch of rent control activists and more like a 1979 nightclub? Get your bad girls ready and find the burgundy slacks because “Summer,” a musical dedicated to Boston’s angelic choir girl turned dance floor queen—Donna Summer— opens at in downtown Tampa on Tuesday. More than 20 classic hits from the disco diva are part of the show, which hits the Straz Center stage eight times through Jan. 16. Summer: The Donna Summer Musical. Jan. 11-16. $39. Carol Morsani Hall at David A. Straz Center for the Performing Arts, 1010 N WC Macinnes Pl., Tampa. strazcenter.org— Ray Roa

CITYOFSTPETE/FLICKR

STOP N SHOP: St. Pete’s Coliseum hosts the city’s first ever comic con.

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“If I could have done one more, I would have done one more.” POLITICS

ISSUES

OPINION

Rick rolled

St. Pete’s outgoing mayor tells us how he’s feeling. By Ray Roa

n Oct. 14, St. Petersburg Mayor Rick Kriseman kicked off his long goodbye by unveiling a plaque marking the anniversary of a Sister City relationship with Takamatsu, Japan. A whole heck of a lot has changed in the 60 years since the diplomatic agreement between that community 7,516 miles away, but Kriseman—who, outside of a respectable gray beard, doesn’t come off much older than he did at inauguration—was there to start reflecting on changes he’s overseen during the last eight years leading the Sunshine City. On Monday, 81 days after starting the “Faring Well Tour," the 59-year-old mayor— whose childhood ambition was to actually be on the radio—again found himself at the pier and behind a microphone (attached to a podium, not a radio control board) to wrap it up. Outside Doc Ford’s, Kriseman fittingly drank straight rum. When the former state rep took office in a 2014 ceremony at city hall just a 12-minute walk away, there was probably somebody with an open container in the shadow of a fenced-off, aging pier. To kick off his term, Kriseman ordered fences near the soon-to-bedemolished icon to be taken down. Kriseman wanted St. Pete to start walking, running and fishing near the landmark again. City officials were also told to get moving. “Simply put, our city hall has not kept up with the city,” Kriseman said at the time, adding that without adjustments, St. Pete would fall behind other cities. If you looked around Monday as a Floridian winter blew the sound of steel drums and troprock into the air, you’d have seen that eight years later, the Sunshine City has more than caught up, and in many ways is leading the race. It felt like everyone—from the city staffers, friends and family surrounding Kriseman to the passers by with plastic cups in hand—was drinking rum. The new $92 million pier is Kriseman’s big, tangible achievement and the right place to look back on what’s happened under his watch. Six years ago, and six miles away, at Clam Bayou, Kriseman was first made aware of sewage moving into the tidal estuary when a Creative Loafing Tampa Bay contributor-turned-editor called to ask him what the hell was going on.

A year into his term, this was Kriseman’s “apoopcalypse,” an actual 30-year problem made worse in 2011 when city council voted to close Albert Whitted sewage plant. Kriseman’s office did the will of council, then 2015 storms left him to choose between raw sewage coming up in people’s toilets and flowing down the street or discharging partially treated wastewater into the bay. Kriseman owned that L and ultimately refused to peg the blame on others. Now, a city that never had a wastewater master plan has one.

LOCAL NEWS

Kriseman is most proud about how far St. Pete has come since being led by former mayors Foster and Baker. The city has inarguably become a national hub for the LGBTQ community and is more inclusive than ever. Last month, council voted to adopt the findings of a study acknowledging St. Pete’s structurally racist history. In his speech on Monday, Kriseman cited record-low poverty rates as a marker for how much better off the city is, but he knows there’s still a lot of work to do in a community where rising rents are pushing people out of their apartments and homes (in October, a renter being evicted as part of a hotel expansion died while moving out). The entire country is wrangling with a housing crisis, but especially so in St. Pete and Tampa where residents are more rent burdened than anywhere else in the U.S.

KRISEMAN/TWITTER

NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP: Mayor Rick Kriseman toasting to St. Pete. “We are in the best condition we have been in possibly the last three decades at least,” he told Bay News 9. Opponents tried to bury Kriseman over that shit during his 2017 re-election campaign, but like in 2013—when he resoundingly defeated Bill Foster who famously did not attend St. Pete Pride—Kriseman was running against another figure not-so-well-liked in the LGBTQ community. Rick Baker once famously refused to sign a proclamation, acknowledging and celebrating the contributions of St. Pete’s queer community; despite a desperate rebrand, he lost to Kriseman by 2,191 votes.

Kriseman told CL that he feels like his administration has set a good foundation with the “Housing For All, From All” plan. “It’d be nice to have more resources, hopefully Sadowski funds flow,” Kriseman said, calling for pragmatic and thoughtful changes instead of overnight fixes. “Everybody thinks they have the quick fix, but there’s always ramifications for everything that you do. You make sure that there aren’t unintended consequences, because you may fix one problem and create another one. And so that’s been the thing we’ve always tried to do is take our time, not that we want to move slowly, but we want to do it right."

Another thing Kriseman seems to have done right is pick a police chief. Asked why police response to last summer’s Black Lives Matter protests was markedly different in St. Pete and Tampa (where officers routinely pepper sprayed and tried to get charges on protesters), Kriseman gave credit to Chief Anthony Holloway, who he tapped to lead SPPD in 2014, and said that a lot of the change folks called for had already been implemented in St. Pete. “He’s taking community-oriented policing and expanded it into what I call relationship-oriented policing,” Kriseman said of Holloway, a St. Petersburg College grad who previously served as Clearwater’s first Black police captain. “The community gets respect from the officers, and then the officers get it from the community. He’s built this relationship, and the officers have built the relationship up. I think that’s why it was different.” Just half a mile away from the brand new police headquarters, critics of Kriseman had hoped negotiations with the Tampa Bay Rays might’ve gone differently, but Kriseman’s made strides there, too, by selecting Midtown Group to redevelop the Tropicana Field site and hoping to restore some form of justice to Black residents of the Gas Plant and surrounding communities demolished in the ‘70s and ‘80s to make way for big promises, interstate and a baseball team that didn’t yet exist. City Council and incoming Mayor Ken Welch—who’ll be inaugurated virtually on Jan. 6—will take the reins on the development, but Kriseman deserves credit for keeping the Rays in St. Pete over the course of eight years and not folding under the weight of the stingy ownership’s threats to leave or split the season if they didn’t get taxpayer handouts to build a new stadium. (Tampa politicians, by contrast, are eager to sign on the dotted line.) Despite the debacle the Rays have created, Kriseman counts the outstanding issues with the team and the continued development of the Trop site, along with the marina, among the things he wishes he could have seen through—a mark of an elected official who truly felt like he had the best job in the world. Kriseman has been mum on future plans, only saying he’s looking forward to spending time with his wife with whom he’s raised two college-aged kids. And while he’s explicitly said that he will not run for any office in 2022, Kriseman told CL that he would make an exception for one race and one race only. “I think I would like to have one more turn if I could have,” he said. “I’d like to have been able to see some of these projects to the end… if I could have done one more, I would have done one more.”

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Rolled over

Dems losing big, the end of Roe and more predictions for 2022. By Jeffrey C. Billman

15. The end of Roe We knew this was coming the moment Mitch McConnell rushed Amy Coney Barrett onto the Supreme Court: During oral arguments in December, in a case that originated in Mississippi, the Court’s farright majority signaled their intent to eviscerate the right to abortion. The only question is whether the Court will abandon its longstanding fetal viability threshold or junk Roe v. Wade altogether—death by a thousand papercuts or death by an ax to the skull. Either way, Roe is dead. If there was any doubt, consider the mental gymnastics the Court’s conservatives went through to allow Texas’ antiabortion law—another affront to Roe—to stand. (Raise your hand if you think they’ll allow California to ban assault weapons using legal trickery. Didn’t think so.) And if there’s any doubt that the Court’s conservatives are ideologically driven radicals, they’ll vanish this spring when the abortion ruling comes down. That leaves a question for Democrats: Will they get over their tepidity about “politicizing” the judiciary and realize that’s already happened, or will they keep getting steamrolled?

immediate problem was the surge in homicides: a 30% increase in 2020, another 10% increase in 2021. It didn’t matter that the surge happened in cities that increased police funding the same as those that cut it, or that, other than homicides, crime rates have continued a decade-long trend. Police reform had to wait. 17. The killing of Andrew Brown Jr. The morning after former Minneapolis Officer Derek Chauvin was convicted of murdering George Floyd, sheriff’s deputies in Elizabeth City, North Carolina, murdered Andrew Brown Jr., a 42-year-old Black man, shooting him five times from behind as he drove away. Except the district attorney in Pasquotank County tripped over himself to say Brown—who was unarmed—was using his car as a weapon and the deputies shot Brown in self-defense, so he wouldn’t prosecute them. He then presented body-cam footage that, well, showed the exact opposite. Brown’s family has filed a $30 million lawsuit, and the FBI is reportedly investigating whether the sheriff’s office violated Brown’s rights by gunning him down from behind. Whatever comes of those things, the fact remains that the justice George Floyd received is the exception, not the rule.

INFORMED DISSENT

16. The homicide spike George Floyd’s murder last year provoked a longoverdue reckoning, with cities questioning the way their police departments were funded and held accountable. About half of the country’s largest cities reduced their police budgets—often by relatively small amounts, and usually in the context of broader pandemicrelated budget cuts. Cities and states also imposed measures to scrutinize law enforcement behavior and moderate use-of-force policies. And then, as suddenly as the police reform movement gathered momentum, that momentum collapsed. Some Democrats blamed Defund the Police activists for their unexpectedly poor showing in the 2020 elections. But the more

18. Gerrymandering A key component of the stalled For the People Act was an attempt to ban political gerrymandering, which could be the means by which Republicans seize control of the U.S. House in November even if the expected red wave fails to materialize. Or maybe not, if court fights over Republican-drawn districts in Ohio and North Carolina go the Democrats’ way and New York Dems pull off a hardcore gerrymander of their own. The issue isn’t—or shouldn’t be—which party gerrymandering helps. It’s that thanks to technological advances, lawmakers can now select their voters with mathematical precision, rather than the other way around, and the results of most elections are foregone conclusions before the first ballot is cast. That’s no way to run a healthy democracy.

“Biden says he’d sign a bill to forgive student loan debt if Congress passed one, which it won’t.”

19. Student loan debt On May. 1, Joe Biden—who promised to forgive at least $10,000 in student loan debt—will

ADAM SCHULTZ

e’ve arrived at the conclusion of our 2021 countdown, having explored the emergent threats to our democratic institutions and the stories that dogged the White House in the summer and fall. Our final segment is something of a catch-all, bouncing from hot-button civil rights issues to unknowns that might dominate 2022’s political conversations.

NO, JOE: President Joe Biden delivers holds a press conference at the G20 leaders’ summit in Rome. allow federal student loan payments to resume nearly two years after they paused under Donald Trump. That’s a hell of a message to campaign on. By resuming the payments, the White House hopes the signal that the economy is back on solid ground. For borrowers who collectively owe $1.6 trillion, that perception isn’t likely to be their number-one concern. Biden says he’d sign a bill to forgive student loan debt if Congress passed one, which it won’t. His Department of Education is still reviewing whether he has the authority to forgive debt unilaterally, which might be one way to mitigate the political damage with young voters. 20. The Trump investigations A House committee is investigating the Jan. 6 insurrection—including White House officials’ role in coordinating and fomenting the attack—and Trump is suing to block the release of potentially damning records. New York is investigating Donald Trump’s business practices, and he’s suing to shut down that probe, too. A Georgia prosecutor is investigating whether Trump’s phone call to the secretary of

state demanding that he “find” additional votes crossed a legal line. Trump is also facing lawsuits from Capitol Police officers and lawmakers over the Jan. 6 violence, and a defamation lawsuit stemming from sexual assault allegations. Who knows what any of these will amount to, but they’ll keep Trump in the news. On the one hand, claims of martyrdom will only further endear him to his devotees. On the other, it’s hard to run a presidential campaign while fighting a felony rap. 21. The Omicron wave We’ll end on the biggest question mark of 2022: How bad will the hyper-transmissible Omicron variant be? We know the wave is coming. We know it will tear through unvaccinated areas, though vaccinated people are still susceptible, especially those without boosters. But will it kneecap the economic recovery? Will it lead to new pandemic restrictions? Will it fill emergency rooms (or morgues) for weeks on end? Or will it finally persuade the vaccine-resistant to get with the program?

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Shit Happened MONDAY 03 FLORIDA CHANNEL

The CDC says people should avoid cruise ships “regardless of vaccination status.” Fauci clearly has no clue how good the late night sushi is. While it was a brisk 63 degrees here in Tampa, it got quite a bit colder up in the frigid tundra we call the Panhandle. Monday morning, the Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office tweeted a video of a cold white substance the northerners refer to as snow.

MERCURY

St. Petersburg’s Mayor-Elect Ken Welch has COVID, and will do his inauguration virtually. So 2022 is totally on brand so far.

TUESDAY 04 Speaking of on brand, Florida Gov. DeSantis’ press conference was shut down following the arrest of well-known Black activist Ben Frazier who was told by a man who described himself

ROB LOUD

as a facilities manager that the conference was only for “credentialed press” and asked everyone to leave “who is not media.” According to the Northside Coalition of Jacksonville’s website, Frazier serves as the president and is a former journalist.

After 20 years and two locations in the historic district, The Orpheum—where the Killers played in 2019—says it’s closing in Ybor City. No word on what’s going into the current 700-plus capacity venue though—probably a dispensary or something. Steaming piles of 2022 shit, as it’s dropped in real-time, via cltampa.com/news.

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California dreamin’

New home for beloved taco truck leads latest round of food news. By Kyla Fields and Stephanie Powers Tacos las Californias was also featured in last week's roundup of Tampa Bay’s 50 Best Restaurants of 2021 list—deemed as must-try eats from the Creative Loafing staff. Seminole Heights vegan bakery Gaia is closed Tampa vegan bakery Gaia has closed. Owned by Sarah Hunt Bollhorst, the business, located at 6617 N Nebraska Ave. in Seminole Heights, opened in March focusing mainly on donuts and other allergen-free baked goods (including some amazing cakes). In her announcement, Bollhorst opened up about how taxing running a small business was on her mental health and the overall wellbeing of her family (including two young sons). “I was struggling to find joy in anything,” Bollhorst wrote, “Every time something would go wrong I was having another panic attack.” When the store’s numbers kept falling, she realized she had to get outside help. “I finally met a fantastic therapist that helped me to realize that my business’ financial success was not a direct correlation to my personal worth,” Bollhorst’s post continued. Bollhorst’s days of baking are not over, she is just going to focus on the things she is good at over the business-running aspect of the industry. “My ideal job would be as some kind of allergy safe recipe consultant,” Bollhorst told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “I want to reach out to local eateries and see if I can help them develop signature dishes that allergy sufferers or dietary restricted people can enjoy in their establishment.” Bollhorst is also looking into cake-decorating positions around town and wants to start her own YouTube channel. Follow @sarahmakesherself on Instagram for updates.

OPENINGS & CLOSINGS

St. Pete is getting a new Sprouts Farmers Market in the former Kmart plaza Boutique grocer Sprouts, which just opened in Tampa Heights, is continuing its rapid takeover of Tampa Bay with yet another new location, this time in St. Petersburg. According to the Tampa Bay Business Journal, the new Sprouts Farmers Market will

TACOSLASCALIFORNIAS/FACEBOOK

ince July 2020, Tacos las Californias has been dishing its beloved quesabirria tacos, ramen, quesadillas, and fat California-style burritos out of an Armenia Avenue food truck, but the West Coast-style Mexican spot heads into the new year with its first brick-and-mortar location up and running at 5635 Memorial Hwy. in Tampa's Town 'n' Country neighborhood. Opening its first taco truck during the height of the pandemic, no one—including its owners Chris and Marlly Sanchez-Garcia—could have predicted that Tacos las Californias would rocket to success the way it has since its debut last summer. Only a year-and-a-half into their business, the Garcias now have two Tampa locations, as their first storefront opened its doors in December 2020. Tacos las Californias and its famous drippy broth now have over 20,000 followers on Instagram, and co-owner Chris Garcia attributes their fast success to social media buzz, as he told ThatssoTampa a few weeks ago. They were one of the first taquerias to introduce the quesabirria food trend to Tampa Bay last year, and their business has not stopped growing since. Other staples on its birria-forward menu are the carne asada nachos, shredded chicken taquitos, and the beloved California burrito—complete with french fries, sour cream, guacamole and your choice of meat. Over the past year, the Mexican spot has also added homemade aguas frescas and paletas to its menu—alongside other drink options like Mexican Cokes and a full rainbow display of Jarritos. Both the storefront and food truck have the same menu and operating hours of 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Tuesday through Saturday, 11 a.m.-8 p.m. on Sunday and are closed every Monday. This popular taqueria is always selling out of stuff—especially on the weekends—so make sure you check @tacoslascalifornias on Instagram and Facebook and hope you don’t stumble upon the dreaded “no more birria today” post. Prepare to leave Tacos las Californias with a full belly and red birria-stained fingertips.

GOING, GOING, BACK, BACK: Tacos las Californias food truck now has a brick-and-mortar. debut alongside home decor retailer At Home inside the former Kmart plaza at 4501 66th St. N in Kenneth City. Up until 2019, the site was home to St. Petersburg’s last Kmart. The Phoenix-based grocer is known for fresh, natural and organic products including produce and prepared foods. The locations also feature a deli, butcher shop, and on-site fish market. The new Sprouts location is just the latest to sprout up around Tampa Bay. The new St. Pete store will be the fourth in Pinellas County and the 11th store in the Tampa Bay area, with more on the way over the next couple years.—Colin Wolf King of the Coop's South Tampa location is now open The South Tampa location of locally-based, eternally-expanding hot chicken franchise King of the Coop is here. King of the Coop's South Tampa location is at 500 S Howard Ave. and had initially planned on a Sept. 1 opening. Late night hours at South Tampa won't go into effect for at least another month, according to owner Joe Dodd, who said he'd like the store to get on its feet and works out the kinks. Dodd added that the South Tampa location will most resemble what most King of the Coop locations will look like going forward.

"We've got new fryers to help with our oil consumption, and we'll now be able to filter our oil after every 10 drops," he said. The South Tampa location joins existing Coop locations in Seminole Heights and Wesley Chapel. A St. Pete location should be open by early next year along with a Westchase location that hopes to open this month.—Ray Roa St. Petersburg’s Mahaffey Theater will host Brunched 2022 The best reason to drink in the morning is back—and it's headed across the bridge to downtown St.Pete’s Mahaffey Theater in 2022. Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s Brunched takes place on Saturday, Feb. 19, complete with unlimited food samples, a bloody mary competition and a beautiful waterfront view. Brunched lets breakfast-lovers sample unlimited small bites from some of the best restaurants in Tampa Bay. And although there’s no official lineup yet, there’s a good chance that 2022’s event will feature some of the concepts that served previous Brunched parties, like Anchor and Brine, Bulla, American Social, Luv Child, Maple Street Biscuit Company, Park & Rec , Shuffle, 7th + Grove and many more.

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The old ways

Don’t drive by this shack along a country road. By Jeff Houck

ecause you totally expect to find refriger- skies and powder-white clouds will find posthuated cases of organic uncured smoked beef mous homes on platters at Thanksgiving tables. brisket bacon, duck prosciutto, local grass- A fresh plucked Blue Foot Bresse chicken is phofed-and-finished hot dogs, fresh-hatched goose tographed naked from the neck down, with tan eggs, ground organ burger meat, Florida holly skin looking like it summered in Ibiza. honey harvested by a neighboring Dutch beeThere’s a bigger mission here than a threekeeper and fresh-ground hot Italian sausage days-a-week market. Olivor is a combination of inside a 20-foot wood-paneled shed next to an their grandsons’ names, Oliver and Ivor. olive-green farmhouse with a screened front “We wanted them to grow up knowing where porch just feet from a two-lane country back- their food came from and how to raise it naturoad a half-mile from the county fairgrounds. rally,” it says on the market’s website. Inside, next to the counter where Mary runs Among the creed of family beliefs stated on the register, is a shelf with their site: Chef G’s BarBQ sauce, • The old ways should whose tagline is, “So delinot be forgotten. cious and addictive, you • Local regenerative may need a support group!” farming techniques are Next to these are bottles better for the environment. of Largo-made Taco Jesus • Humanely raised food brand chipotle and habatastes better. ñero hot sauce. • Pasture-raised food Behind her is a photo is an experience that takes of what a T. rex would look us back to a simpler time Olivor Heritage Farms like sectioned if a butcher “Actually being able to 341 Sydney Washer Rd., Dover 813-494-6751. olivorheritagefarms.com got a swipe at one. Hint: raise enough food to feed Tyrannosaurs are mostly your family and have surleg and tail meat, not much for drumsticks. plus to sell to others is a powerful thing, at the Owners John and Chrysti raise and harvest most basic level of living. We must all eat to live!” much of what is slaughtered and sold. The pigs Even from a shack along a country road. in the natural pens behind the house get muddy, Jeff Houck is a 12-year veteran of the Tampa as they should. Turkeys peck at the grass in the Tribune, which he left in 2014 to pursue other sunshine. And the geese, well … “They’re like endeavors. He’s now Marketing and Public dogs,” says Mary. “They’ll chase you.” Relations Manager at Columbia Restaurant The farm’s Facebook feed connects the dots Group, but also a farmer’s market devotee who’ll even more directly. A fluffy flock of ducklings hud- spend the next few months writing about Tampa dling under heat lamps will become future duck Bay’s best until he’s covered every last one. Follow breasts. Free-range turkeys waddling under blue @jeffhouck on Twitter.

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OLIVORHERITAGEFARMS/FACEBOOK

PLUCK YEAH: Blue Foot Bresse chickens at Olivor Heritage Farms.

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‘Rona. It’s still a thing, and you should call or contact these local breweries to learn their COVID-19 protocol. Email rroa@cltampa.com and stephanie@cltampa.com for any edits and suggestions. 3 DAUGHTERS BREWING One of downtown St. Pete’s District’s most popular hangouts, and a beautiful facility in which to drink some great brews. 222 22nd St. S, St. Petersburg. 727-495-6002, 3dbrewing.com 3 KEYS BREWING South-of-the-Skyway restaurant and brewery specializing in small batches. 2505 Manatee Ave. E, Bradenton. 951-218-0396, 3keysbrewing.com 5 BRANCHES BREWING Veteran-owned brewery, small batches from IPAs to stouts. Serving brews and a clear view of the Tarpon Bayou. 531 Athens St., Tarpon Springs. fivebranchesbrewing.com 7VENTH SUN BREWING Some of the best sours, IPAs and collabs going. Two locations. 1012 Broadway, Dunedin. 727-733-3013/6809 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa. 813-231-5900, 7venthsun.com 81BAY BREWING CO. South Tampa’s first craft brewery boasts a wide variety of styles. 4465 W Gandy Blvd., Tampa. 813-837-BREW, 81baybrewco.com ANGRY CHAIR Crazy-good Seminole Heights beer, open Tuesday-Sunday. Just don’t park on Fern Street (there’s a lot behind the auto body shop). 6401 N Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-238-1122, angrychairbrewing.com ARKANE ALEWORKS A wide variety of styles and flavors from the second brewery to open in Largo. 2480 E Bay Dr., No. 23, Largo. 727-270-7117, arkanebeer.com AVID BREWING This Grand Central brewing supply shop added a taproom for its beers crafted in-house. 1745 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-388-6756, avidbrew.com BARRIEHAUS BEER CO. Lager-specific brewery, carrying on an over 150 year brewing legacy. 1403 E 5th Ave., Ybor City. barriehaus.com BASTET Named after the Egyptian cat-goddess, the brewery offers seasonal ales, ciders and even the occasional hard ginger beer. 1951 E Adamo Dr. Suite B, Tampa. bastetbrewing.com BAY CANNON BEER CO. West Tampa’s first craft brewery, offering a variety of ever evolving beers, beer slushies and wine that pair perfectly with appetizers and entrées from the kitchen. 813-442-5615, baycannon.com BAYBORO BREWING CO. Veteran-owned kid-friendly brewery that has tons of events to go with its creative tap list. 2390 5th Ave. S, St. Petersburg. (727) 767-9666, bayborobrewing.com BIG STORM BREWING CO. Stop by this Pasco brewery’s Storm Room for a flight, or visit its taproom on 49th Street in Clearwater, too. 2330 Success Dr., Odessa. 727-807-7998, bigstormbrewery.com BIG TOP BREWING Perhaps Sarasota’s premier purveyor of locally crafted beer, Big Top’s reputation has spread far beyond the region. 6111 Porter Way, Sarasota. 941-371-2939, bigtopbrewing.com BOOTLEGGERS BREWING CO. This Brandon taproom from Bootleggers Beer & Wine Home Brewing Supplies offers house-made suds and guest beers. 652 Oakfield Dr., Brandon. 813-643-9463, bootleggersbrewco.com BRASSERIE ST. SOMEWHERE Award-winning Belgian farmhouse ales from veteran Bay area brewer Bob Sylvester who’s moved tastings inside his brewery. 115 S Ring Ave., Tarpon Springs. 813-503-6181, saintsomewherebrewing.com BREW BUS BREWING BB’s Seminole Heights taproom is moving a few blocks up Florida Ave., but until then sip on the Bus’ offerings at the Wesley Chapel facility. 2029 Arrowgrass Dr., Wesley Chapel. 813-452-6333, brewbususa.com BREW HUB Some of the area’s best beers are produced here along with suds for its own label. 3900 Frontage Rd. S, Lakeland. 863-698-7600, brewhub.com BREW LIFE BREWING Ultra-small batches, and a lot of ‘em. 5765 S Beneva Rd., Sarasota. 941-952-3831, brewlifebrewing.com BRIGHTER DAYS BREW CO. Tarpon Springs spot specializing in music-inspired brews like the “So Fresh n’ So Clean sour” and “All the Single Belgians.” 311 N Safford Ave., Tarpon Springs. 727-940-2350 BULLFROG CREEK BREWING CO. A multitude of styles from former garage brewers is on tap in Valrico. 3632 Lithia Pinecrest Rd., Valrico. 813-703-8835, bullfrogcreekbrewing.com CAGE BREWING Custom brews in the Grand Central District from one of the ‘Burg’s best. 2001 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-201-4278 CALEDONIA BREWING Great in-house beers in the

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historic Dunedin Times building. 587 Main St., Dunedin. 727-351-5105, caledoniabrewing.com CALUSA BREWING Family owned and operated, open Tuesday-Sunday. 5701 Derek Ave., Sarasota. 941-9228150, calusabrewing.com CARROLLWOOD BREWING CO. “Secret” brewing action inside the Carrollwood location of craft-bar chain The Brass Tap. 10047 N Dale Mabry Hwy Suite 23, Tampa. 813-969-2337. brasstapbeerbar.com CIGAR CITY BREWING Tampa’s most famous craft brewery. There’s also a taproom at Amalie Arena. 3924 W Spruce St., Tampa. 813-348-6363, cigarcitybrewing.com CLEARWATER BREWING CO. Community-oriented and socially and environmentally conscious. 1700 N Fort Harrison Ave., Clearwater. clearwaterbrewingcompany.com COPPERTAIL BREWING CO. Some of Tampa’s best beer, in one of its best tasting rooms. 2601 E 2nd Ave., Ybor City. 813-247-1500, coppertailbrewing.com COTEE RIVER BREWING Craft beer in the heart of historic downtown New Port Richey. 5760 Main St., New Port Richey. 727-807-6806, coteeriverbrewing.com CRAFT LIFE BREWING Small-batch local brews and a sort of playground for LoL’s craft brewing guild. 4624 Land O’ Lakes Blvd., Land O’ Lakes. 813-575-8440. @ craftlifebrewing on Facebook CROOKED THUMB BREWERY Safety Harbor’s first brewery boasts homegrown flavor, local guest taps and a killer Tuesday songwriters session. 555 10th Ave. S, Safety Harbor. 727-724-5953, crookedthumbbrew.com CUENI BREWING CO. Located off the Pinellas Trail in Dunedin. 945 Huntley Ave., Dunedin. 727266-4102, cuenibrewing.com CYCLE BREWING One of St. Pete’s favorites. 534 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-320-7954. cyclebrewing.com DARWIN BREWING CO. Unique beers crafted with South American influence. 803 17th Ave. W, Bradenton. 941-747-1970, darwinbrewingco.com DE BINE BREWING CO. This addition bolsters the Northern Pinellas craft beer scene. 933 Florida Ave., Palm Harbor, 727-233-7964. DEVIANT LIBATION Latest project from local beer god Tim Ogden housed in the upcoming immersive art collective Crab Devil. 3800 N Nebraska Ave., 727379-4677, devitantlibation.com DISSENT BREWING CO. Unique flavors and adventurous style outside downtown St. Pete. 5518 Haines Rd. N, St. Petersburg. 727-342-0255. DUNEDIN BREWERY Florida’s oldest. Beer, eats and live music. 937 Douglas Ave., Dunedin. 727-736-0606, dunedinbrewery.com DUNEDIN HOUSE OF BEER This beer stop brews its own, and also has 40 guest taps. 927 Broadway, Dunedin. 727 216-6318, dunedinhob.com ESCAPE BREWING CO. Another very worthy OdessaTrinity destination. 9945 Trinity Blvd., Suite 108, Trinity. 727-807-6092, escapebrewingcompany.com FLYING BOAT BREWING COMPANY St. Pete aviation history and tasty homegrown suds. It’s where Tampa fave King State brews its wares. 1776 11th Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-800-2999, flyingboatbrewing.com FOUR STACKS BREWING An always-changing lineup of local and regional guest suds, along with trivia, live music and more. 5469 N. U.S. Hwy-41, Apollo Beach. 813-641-2036, fourstacksbrewing.com GRAND CENTRAL BREWHOUSE 10,270 square-foot brewery, taproom, beer garden, and event venue with a lager-focused tap list. 2340 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-202-6071, grandcentralbrew.com GREEN BENCH BREWING CO. A space worthy of the adventurous beers it produces. 1133 Baum Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-800-9836, greenbenchbrewing.com GOOD LIQUID BREWING CO. 30 taps and food (and a coffee roaster!) from a husband-and-wife duo. 4824 14th St. W, Bradenton. 941-896-6381, thegoodliquidbrewing.com GRINDHAUS BREW LAB Small batches and no extracts. 1650 N Hercules Ave., Clearwater. 727-240-0804, grindhausbrewlab.com GULFPORT BREWERY + EATERY Small batches with an artisanal food menu. 3007 Beach Blvd., Gulfport. 727954-4109, gulfport-brewing.com

HOB BREWING CO. Rotating taps; some of the beers are brewed on-site and alongside a combination of local breweries plus local and international craft beer makers. 931 Huntley Ave., Dunedin. hob.beer IF I BREWED THE WORLD This self-described “mixtape of breweries” offers a bit of everything from the classic to the fun and outrageous. 2200 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-201-4484, ifibrewedtheworld.com IN THE LOOP BREWING Family-friendly Land O’ Lakes brewery with a lot of community support and plenty of events. 3338 Land O’ Lakes Blvd., Land O’ Lakes. 813-997-9189, intheloopbrewingcompany.com INFUSION BREWING CO. Another great location in the good-beer-packed Trinity-New Port Richey area. 7813 Mitchell Blvd. Suite 103, Trinity. 727-312-4512. JDUB’S BREWING CO. You know ‘em, you love ‘em. A favorite statewide phenomenon. 1215 Mango Ave., Sarasota. 941-955-2739, jdubsbrewing.com KING STATE Named the No. 8 coffee shop in America by Food & Wine, King State is also home to brewer and Flying Boat Brewing Co. alum Aric Parker, who’s making some of the cleanest core beers plus a dynamic offering of rotating taps and bomber options available on-site in limited capacities. 520 E Floribraska Ave., Tampa. 813221-2100, king-state.com LAGERHAUS BREWERY & GRILL A Palm Harbor bar and eatery that offers seasonal brews to complement its regulars. 3438 East Lake Business, Palm Harbor. 727-216-9682, lagerhausbrewery.com LATE START BREWING This beloved Tampa label does its thing inside the Pour House. 1208 E. Kennedy Blvd. #112, Tampa. 813-402-2923, latestartbrewing.com LEAVEN BREWING Riverview’s first brewery is run by folks who’ve got experience brewing big and small. 11238 Boyette Rd., Riverview. 813-677-7023, leavenbrewing.com MAD BEACH CRAFT BREWING Brews, ciders, and meads by the beach. 12945 Village Blvd., Madeira Beach. 727-362-0008, madbeachbrewing.com MAGNANIMOUS BREWING In a warehouse a half-block north of I-275, this addition to Tampa’s beer scene provides a large variety to drink in or to go–curbside pickup available. The brewery also serves Ginger Beard coffee when the tasting room is open including a peanut butter oat draft latte. 1410 Florida Ave., Tampa. 813-415-3671, magnanimousbrewing.com MARKER 48 Hernando’s first production craft brewery, with its own tasting room and beer garden 12147 Cortez Blvd, Weeki Wachee. 352-606-2509, marker48.com MASTRY’S BREWING CO. From CD Roma’s restaurant to sweet new digs on St. Pete Beach. 7701 Blind Pass Rd., St. Pete Beach. 727-202-8045, mastrysbrewingco.com MOTORWORKS BREWING A taproom and beer garden featuring full liquor and wine as well as 30 taps. 1014 9th St. W, Bradenton. 941-567-6218, motorworksbrewing.com MR. DUNDERBAK’S The longtime restaurant, biergarten and homebrewers’ hangout is serving its own beers. 14929 Bruce B. Downs Blvd., Tampa. 813-977-4104, dunderbaks.com NAUGHTY MONK BREWERY Naughty Monk brings a love of Belgian styles to Manatee County. 2507 Lakewood Ranch Blvd., Bradenton. 941-708-2966, naughtymonkbrewery.com OVERFLOW BREWING St. Pete’s newest, courtesy of local Rapp head brewer Troy Bledsoe and company. 770 1st Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-914-0665. @overflowbrewingco on Facebook PEPPER BREWING The Angry Pepper Taphouse’s in-house label, available “on a limited basis.” 9366 Oakhurst Rd., Seminole. 727-596-5766, angrypeppertaphouse.com PESKY PELICAN BREW PUB This beachy restaurant also offers its own beers thanks to an in-house nano

system. 923 72nd. St. N, St. Petersburg. 727-302-9600, peskypelicanbrewpub.com PINELLAS ALE WORKS PAW offers a dog-friendly environment in addition to tasty brews. 1962 1st Ave. S, St. Petersburg. 727-235-0970, pawbeer.com PYE ROAD MEADWORKS Located in Odessa, Pye Road focuses on mead but also keeps beer and wine in house for naysayers of the fermented honey drink. 8533 Gunn Hwy., Odessa. 813-510-3500, pyeroad.com RAPP BREWING CO. The late Greg Rapp’s awardwinning styles are carefully crafted and delicious. 10930 Endeavor Way, Seminole. 727-544-1752, rappbrewing.com RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER This video game-centric Grand Central District craft beer bar started brewing its own in early 2018. 2244 Central Ave., St. Petersburg. 727-360-0766, stpetearcadebar.com ROCK BROTHERS BREWING Brews named for national and local bands have a home in Ybor City. 1901 N. 15th St., Ybor City. 813-241-0110, rockbrothersbrewing.com SARASOTA BREWING CO. House-crafted brews, pizza, and sports out toward beautiful Siesta Key. 6607 Gateway Ave., Sarasota. 941-925-2337, sarasotabrewing.com SILVERKING BREWING CO. This space in Tarpon Springs complements a label that’s been around since 2012. 325 E Lemon St., Tarpon Springs. 727-422-7598, silverkingbrewing.com SIX TEN BREWING A wide variety and a real passion for the craft-brew community. 7052 Benjamin Rd., Tampa. 813-886-0610, sixtenbrewing.com SOGGY BOTTOM BREWING More Dunedin goodness, including some truly original flavors and inventive brews. 660 Main St., Dunedin. 727-601-1698, soggybottombrewing.com SOUTHERN BREWING & WINEMAKING Multiple brews only available in its tasting room, as well as products and guidance for local homebrewers. 4500 N Nebraska Ave., Tampa. 813-238-7800, southernbrewingwinemaking.com ST. PETE BREWING CO. Beers crafted specifically for the climate. 544 1st Ave. N, St. Petersburg. 727-692-8809, stpetebrewingcompany.com STILT HOUSE BREWERY This friendly Palm Harbor joint specializes in high-ABV ales and other styles you won’t find at other breweries in the area. 625 U.S. Hwy Alt-19, Palm Harbor. 727-270-7373, stilthousebrewery.com SWAN BREWING Nearly 4 decades of combined brewing experience go into the offerings at this pet-friendly joint. Two locations. 2972 Lakeland Highlands Rd./115 W. Pine St., Lakeland. 863-703-0472, swanbrewing.com TBBC Formerly Tampa Bay Brewing Co., local favorite for nearly two decades, with two locations. 1600 E 8th Ave., Ybor City/13933 Monroe’s Business Park, Westchase. 813-247-1422, tbbc.beer TIDAL BREWING COMPANY Small batches in Spring Hill. 14311 Spring Hill Dr., Spring Hill. 352-7011602, tidalbrewingfl.com TWO FROGS BREWING CO. Tarpon Springs’ latest brewery and taproom focuses on American ale styles. 151 E Tarpon Ave., Tarpon Springs. 727-940-6077, @twofrogsbrewing on Facebook KEEL FARMS AGRARIAN ALE + CIDER Tasty brews from the folks behind Keel & Curley winery. 5210 W Thonotosassa Rd., Plant City. 813-752-9100, keelandcurleywinery.com TWO LIONS WINERY & PALM HARBOR BREWERY Wine and beer brewed in-house. 1022 Georgia Ave., Palm Harbor. 727-786-8039, twolionswinery.com ULELE SPRING BREWERY Beer crafted in accordance with traditional Bavarian purity laws. 1810 N Highland Ave., Tampa. 813-999-4952, ulele.com THE WILD ROVER BREWERY What started as an English pub in Odessa is now a higher-production facility in Westchase. 13921 Lynmar Blvd., Tampa. 813-475-5995, thewildroverbrewery.com WOODWRIGHT BREWING CO. Traditional German styles in downtown Dunedin. 985 Douglas Ave., Dunedin. 727-238-8717, @woodwrightbrewing on Facebook WOVEN WATER BREWING CO. Tampa Heights brewer with a focused menu often using fresh fruit as part of its beers. 456 W Columbus Dr., Tampa. 813-443-9463, wovenwaterbrew.com ZEPHYRHILLS BREWING CO. East Paco’s first microbrewery. 38530 5th Ave., Zephyrhills. 813-715-2683, zbcbeer.com ZYDECO BREW WERKS Craft brews in Ybor thanks to an award-winning brewmaster, as well as full bars and NOLA-influenced cuisine. 1902 E 7th Ave., Ybor City. 813252-4541, @zydecobrewwerks on Facebook

cltampa.com | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | 21

22 | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | cltampa.com

MOVIES

THEATER

ART

CULTURE

Circa, survival

Rebekah Lazaridis’ new solo show reminds us that nothing lasts forever.

t feels like forever ago, but 2020 was a year of “I got to paint this street and these houses, things happening to us. A year of forced changes. and I felt like I was immersed in it,” Lazaridis A year in which we either searched frantically for told CL. “It was such an amazing escape…such an escape or fought tooth and nail to regain con- a lovely way for me to lose myself. I felt like if I trol of our lives. Or, best case scenario, made time could keep that feeling in my work, then I would for both activities. Some of feel successful and happy us made small changes in with myself. In doing 2020 and 2021. Others, like these home illustrations, Rebekah Lazaridis, made it’s the exact same feeling, CIRCA : New works more dramatic ones. because I feel like I can get by Rebekah Lazaridis “The pandemic cerlost. I get immersed in creOpens Friday, Jan. 7. 6 p.m. (Exhibit up through Jan. 23). Mize Gallery, tainly changed a lot of ating them. I feel like I’m 689 Dr. MLK Jr. St. N, Unit C, St. Petersburg. things for me,” Lazaridis actually in them.” rebekahlaz.com told Creative Loafing These experiences led Tampa Bay in a phone interview. “I was work- to a full-time career in home illustration in ing as a scenic artist in the area for several 2020-2021. Lazaridis also launched a series of different professional theater companies. So I drawings in which she depicts St. Petersburg wasn’t able to work for a year, year-and-a-half, through a selection of 40 off-the-beaten-path because the theater being shut down.” local landmarks. The series includes drawings The change forced Lazaridis to re-evaluate of The Beach Theatre, Southland Roller Palace, how she spends her time. Before the pandemic, Biff Burger, Sunken Gardens, the old Ovo Café Lazaridis wasn’t making much personal work, and H D Cafeteria. Lazaridis depicts each in but that changed in 2020-2021. colored pencil on colored cardstock in the style “When you’re a scenic artist, when you’re on of the home illustrations she completed during a ladder all day painting things, that’s really this same time period. rewarding and amazing work, but at the end of Making these drawings gave Lazaridis an the day, the last thing I want to do is come home opportunity to reflect on the past, to escape the and paint or create for myself,” says Lazaridis. present, and to move forward. With scenic painting out of the equation, For a third-generation St. Pete native 2020-2021 gave Lazaridis the time and energy like Lazaridis, it’s hard to separate family to create more for herself. history from St. Pete his“While we were in tory. Many of the places lockdown, [my husband depicted in this series and I] bought a home, carry personal signifiand I wanted to make a cance for Lazaridis, like closing gift to thank our H D Cafeteria, where she realtor,” Lazaridis told used to eat dinner with CL. “So I did a home illusher grandparents every tration of his house, but I night. Others are based wanted to do it in a differon community memory as ent way, so I put it on colored cardstock and I expressed on “Remember When St. Pete FL.” made the emphasis the sky and the silhouette She drew some as they are now, and others of the home.” as they were then. So much of this project is Although Lazaridis never had much time for based on personal and collective memories of personal work, this wasn’t the first time she’d St. Pete, that memory itself became the theme focused her artist eyes on homes and neigh- of Lazaridis’ solo show at Mize Gallery which borhoods. In 2019, she submitted a painting opens on Friday and runs through Jan. 23. to “Creep,” a show at Mize gallery; the work Lazaridis and Chad Mize touch on the theme features a ghost walking down the street she of memory in “Circa: New works by Rebekah lived on. Lazaridis” in multiple ways. First they express

LOCAL ART

“I kind of wanted to focus on all these little places that I feel are slipping through our fingers in a way.”

REBEKAH LAZARIDIS

By Jennifer Ring

FAVORITE SONG: For a third-generation St. Pete native like Lazaridis, it’s hard to separate family history from city history. the difficulty in attaching exact dates to personal memories via the show’s title: Circa. “Circa is just a word that refers to a time and a place,” Lazaridis told CL. “I don’t have one time period with each of these pieces, because some of these places are no longer in business. And I kind of wanted to create even more of a sense of nostalgia and story with some of these places. I thought that the word ‘Circa’ would be a way to indicate that.” Lazaridis drew the Ovo Café circa 1997, around when it first opened. She depicted Haslam’s Book Store c. 2019, right before it closed due to COVID. “St. Pete is changing so much,” Lazaridis told CL. “I kind of wanted to focus on all these little places that I feel are slipping through our fingers in a way, and make them just as important and iconic. These places for me are the authenticity and heartbeat of St. Petersburg, apart from the art scene, which is why so many people are moving here.”

In addition to the 40 eight-by-ten to 11-by14-inch drawings, “Circa” includes a “nostalgia nook.” Mize provided this additional space for Lazaridis to share her family’s history in St. Pete. When I called, Lazaridis was already forming a pile of personal items to display at Mize Gallery this January. The collection includes a picture of her mother at Sunken Gardens c. 1955, one of her grandfather’s high school track shoes, and an illustration of her grandmother’s home c. 1960. “It is very much a nod to nostalgia,” says Lazaridis, “but a lot of these places are still here and around.” Lazaridis’ “Circa” reminds us that nothing lasts forever. The small businesses that define St. Pete can’t survive perpetually rising operating costs without our continual patronage. So they come and go as their popularity waxes and wanes through the years. “Don’t forget these places,” Lazaridis’ work calls to us. “They made us who we are.”

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Tampa-ish

All the Bay area locations featured in Netflix’s hit ‘Selling Tampa’ series. By Alexandria Jones

elling Tampa has taken Netflix by storm. On release week the reality series ranked No. 1 among the streaming service’s top U.S. shows. If you’re like us, then you’ve already binged all eight episodes but also figured out that besides Tampa, other parts of the Bay are also featured. If you’re wondering about all the local spots these powerful women frequent, we’ve scouted them out, but beware: there are spoilers in the captions. Anchor & Brine Much of the drone footage featuring yachts docked in downtown is taken from above this waterfront favorite at Tampa Marriott Water Street. 505 Water St., Tampa Bayshore Blvd. Sharelle drives in her car along the scenic road as cast members talk about her military background and her entrepreneur skills. At one point, Juwana even shows a condo to Tampa City Attorney Gina Grimes. The Bricks This 7th Avenue mainstay is next door to Allure and gets lots of screen time. 1327 E 7th Ave., Ybor City Cafe Quiquiriqui Colony and Anne-Sophie head to Hotel Haya’s picturesque cafe, just half a block from the Allure office, to resolve an issue between them. 1412 E 7th Ave., Ybor City Camp Tampa Karla and Sharelle meet up at Camp (stylized “CAMP”) for a quick workout session. 3012 W Palmira Ave., Tampa Canvas Fashion Gallery Colony and AnneSophie go shopping to look for outfits to wear to Sharelle’s event. 1535 4th St. N, St. Petersburg Cassis Rena and her husband have lunch on St. Pete’s Beach Drive to talk about her real estate goals and ambitions. 170 Beach Dr., St. Petersburg Cass Street Bridge Visitors should walk a few blocks down to a different downtown icon—a bridge named for Fortune Taylor, one of Tampa’s most important Black women. Central Avenue timeline mural Located within downtown Tampa’s Perry Harvey Park in the moments before Alexis is let go, Sharelle says history motivates her to keep elevating Black business people in Tampa Bay. The timeline should remind the rest of us how Tampa’s Black business corridor was decimated by white supremacy cloaked under the auspice of progress (and interstates). Chill Bros. In this heartfelt scene, Sharelle grabs ice cream with her kids at this Best of the Bay-winning shop and reveals her pregnancy to them. Tears ensue. 1910 E 7th Ave., Ybor City EDGE Rooftop Cocktail Lounge The ladies of Allure head to South Tampa and surprise Sharelle with a baby shower. 1207 S Howard Ave., Tampa

Epicurean Hotel Tennille and Sharelle pull up for Sharelle’s surprise baby shower. 1207 S Howard Ave., Tampa Floridan Palace A recently sold Tampa icon that gets plenty of screen time. 905 N Florida Ave., Tampa Forbici Modern Italian Juawana talks to her mom on FaceTime about her mom’s birthday plans and drops a bombshell about her divorce from her husband. 1633 Snow Ave., Tampa The Getaway Bar & Grill The group— including Sharelle and Juwana who arrive by pontoon boat—meets up for a little lunch and Allure Realty business. 13090 Gandy Blvd., St. Petersburg

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St. Pete Pier Honestly seems unfair to call the show “Selling Tampa” when half of the footage is from Pinellas county and the waters around the pier. Tampa Bay History Center It could be a while, but the ladies of Allure Realty might end up featured at this must-visit downtown Tampa museum. 801 Water St., Tampa Tampa Convention Center Another downtown Tampa mainstay that inevitably makes it into a lot of B-roll. 333 S Franklin St., Tampa Tampa Firefighters Museum Seen in the background as Alexis and Sharelle talk. 720 E Zack St., Tampa Tampa International Airport The group flies from Tampa for a trip to Miami for business and pleasure. 4100 George J Bean Pkwy., Tampa Tampa Riverwalk It’s downtown Tampa’s gem of a sidewalk and gets plenty of play in the “Selling Tampa” B-roll. Truist building Formerly the SunTrust building, this pyramid-topped downtown icon

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Perry Harvey, Sr. Park Sharelle and Alexis meet at the park dedicated to Tampa’s oncethriving and since-decimated Central Avenue neighborhood (aka The Scrub) to talk about Alexis’ performance at Allure Realty. The meeting does not end well for Alexis. 900 E Scott St., Tampa Pier Teaki Sharelle, Juawana, and Tennille meet up on St. Pete’s brand new pier to talk about an upcoming house showing. 800 2nd Ave. NE., St. Petersburg Pirate Water Taxi The ladies of Allure Realty probably don’t scoot across the water with the proletariat, but these trusty yellow skiffs are a fun way for the rest of us to scoot up and down the Hillsborough River. 603 Channelside Dr., Tampa Red Mesa Cantina After ordering margaritas from the downtown St. Pete favorite, Alexis tells Karla about being let go from Allure Realty. 128 3rd St. S., St. Petersburg Rivergate Tower Downtown Tampa’s Beer Can Building gets plenty of play in the show, and

HISTORIC DISTRICT: Some of the women of Allure Realty outside their Ybor City office. Hyde Park Village There’s no avoiding this South Tampa hotspot in Netflix’s new series. 1602 W Snow Ave., Tampa Main Course Restaurant & Lounge Karla, Alexis—together with the feuding Colony and Anne-Sophie—grab food and drinks at the South Tampa soul food staple while talking about business. 4205 S MacDill Ave. Unit H, Tampa Malio’s The Allure crew catwalks past Kiley Garden’s Remedy bar and onto the back patio of the downtown Tampa steakhouse where they celebrate Juwana’s divorce being finalized during a rainy-afternoon Beyoncé-themed party where Sharelle also reveals she’s pregnant. 400 N Ashley Dr., Tampa

it’s where Malio’s steakhouse is located. 400 N Ashley Dr., Tampa Rox Rooftop Bar Colony and Anne-Sophie meet up on the Courtney Campbell Causeway to talk about a double date the night before. 2545 N Rocky Point Dr., Tampa Social Roost Sharelle meets up with Colony and Anne-Sophie in St. Petersburg to talk about Rena recruiting them for a possible brokerage. 150 First Ave. N, St. Petersburg Sparkman Wharf Sparkman Wharf figures into a lot of the B-roll for “Selling Tampa” and it’s a good place to grab lunch while you charge up that e-scooter taking you to all the locations on this list. 615 Channelside Dr., Tampa

is often lit up with a Tampa Bay Lightning bolt. 401 E Jackson St., Tampa Tryst Sharelle and Juawana meet up at this St. Pete spot to talk about Juwana’s upcoming single ladies party and Sharelle’s baby on the way. 240 Beach Dr. NE., St. Petersburg Ulele Rena and Sharelle head to Tampa Heights’ Water Works Park where they grab lunch to talk about tension between them and Rena’s recent acquisition of her own brokerage license. 1810 N Highland Ave., Tampa Water Street If Allure’s plan goes well, the ladies will be selling lots of property within Jeff Vinik’s opportunity-zone abusing development. Downtown Tampa

cltampa.com | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | 27

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28 | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | cltampa.com

Fore play

Historic home of legendary golfer Gene Sarazen is now for sale. By Colin Wolf

historic home originally owned by the golfer who invented the modern day sand wedge is now for sale in New Port Richey. Located at 7151 Jasmin Dr., the home was built in 1928 and was the primary residence of legendary golfer Gene “The Squire” Sarazen, the first and one of only five players to ever accomplish a Career Grand Slam of winning all four majors at least once. When Sarazen and his wife Mary first arrived in New Port Richey in 1927, the Harrison, New York-natives actually resided at the nearby Hotel Hacienda until the home was completed. From the Dade City Banner’s Dec. 20, 1927 issue: Mr. and Mrs. Gene Sarazen arrived at New Port Richey this morning and are stopping at the Hotel Hacienda. Mr. and Mrs. Sarazen will remain at the Hacienda until their beautiful home, which they are building at Jasmin Point, is completed. The contractors are rushing the work and expect to have their home completed so that Mr. and Mrs. Sarazen will be able to move by the 15th of January. When their home is completed it will be one of the most attractive places in this vicinity. It faces the river and has an excellent view both up and down the river and is across the street from the wonderful residence that Thomas Meighan is building. The home, with its wonderful surroundings, being located in the beautiful subdivision of

Jasmin Point, is not only attractive but unusual. The architect has planned one room especially for Gene Sarazen to keep his golf clubs and trophies which he has won in past tournaments and will win in future ones. This is an unusually attractive room and will permit the display of the many wonderful cups that Gene Sarazen has won in the last few years. At the time, the 3,294-square-foot home cost Sarazen $20,000, which today is the equivalent of about $300,000. A year later, the nine-hole Jasmin Point Golf Club opened, and was New Port Richey’s first golf course. Sarazen served as the golf pro, and it was there in 1931 where he invented the steel-shafted “sand iron,” which would later be known as the sand wedge. In 1932, Sarazen used his new invention to win the British Open. Unfortunately, the Jasmine Point Club shuttered after the Depression, and Sarazen sold his home a few years later in 1934. The Squire passed away in 1999 at the age of 97. Now, Sarazen’s three-bedroom, four-bathroom estate is on the market for $825,000, and still retains many of the original features, like the wood burning fireplace and hardwood floors. The listing agent is DJ Arrazcaeta Jr of Re/ Max Alliance Group (stylized “RE/MAX”).

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Pull the plug

‘Resurrections’ should be the death knell of the ‘Matrix’ films. By John W. Allman

“T

rules. Anything can happen there. So why is it that the bulk of “Matrix” films exist far outside the actual Matrix instead of leaning all-in to the untapped possibilities of a digital world packed with limitless potential? To that end, much like “The Matrix” was all about the effort to find Neo (Reeves) and help him recognize his role as savior and superman, the bulk of “The Matrix Resurrections” is about helping Neo rediscover his role and reignite his relationship with Trinity (Carrie-Anne Moss), despite the fact that both characters sacrificed all in “Revolutions.” The problem with this, of course, is that 1) we’ve seen this story told better before and 2) what’s the point of making a new movie if all you’re doing is rehashing instead of creating new storylines, new crises and new adventures to behold? It’s as if Lana and Co. simply don’t know what else to say about the Matrix, which is surprising given how many people in the past 18 years have come to firmly believe we’re actually living in a version of the Matrix. It’s also surprising given how many parallels that exist in our society today with the onslaught of false information, the refusal by so many to accept basic facts as truth and our continued slide into a virtual existence where we cease having flesh-and-blood relationships

in favor of superficial digital encounters that can be manipulated to make ourselves look far different than we really are. I have to believe that Wachowski understands this as “Resurrections” is peppered with dialogue that would suggest that. “They took my life and turned it into a video game,” Neo bemoans at one point to a new character, Bugs (Jessica Henwick). “If we don’t know what’s real, we can’t resist,” she says in response. Why Wachowski doesn’t do more to push those envelopes and create a more satisfying and sinister narrative is confounding. At the end of the day, as a fan and as someone who feels a deep connection to the original film, I’m happy to follow the rabbit and swallow the red pill and take another trip deep into the mainframe. It’s comforting to see Neo and Trinity reunited because it feels like more than nostalgia. In the past two decades, we’ve come to realize just how special Reeves and Moss are, both as actors and as these characters. But I also don’t think it’s too much to ask for there to be a purpose, a reason, an inspiration to revisit their continued struggle against the machines. Otherwise, aren’t we all just complicit and compliant, trapped in our own suspended life pods, willing to accept without question when we’re spoon-fed reheated food and believing without question when we’re told it’s actually fresh?

he Matrix” should have been a standShe also transports viewers to a new resisalone film. As such, it would be regarded tance stronghold, which is very similar to the first as one of the most groundbreaking non- resistance stronghold, Zion, which was attacked comic book, science-fiction/action hybrids ever by the machines in “Revolutions.” For me, Zion made. Yes, yes, I know, a whole slew of people has always been the least exciting foothold in freaking love “The Matrix,” and consider it an the entire “Matrix” construct. It’s a necessary all-time classic. Hear me out. component, for sure, but its very nature limits In hindsight, neither “Reloaded” nor the characters when they are seen there in their “Revolutions” had anything new to say. They both “real” forms because they are less powerful than failed to tell a story, or even if they were still inside the coherently continue the story Matrix. as laid out in the first film. To me, this is a quanThey were just snipdary that also has vexed the The Matrix Resurrections pets of ideas, flashes of “Star Wars” franchise. Yes, it’s ★★ inspired mayhem. They had important to see our heroes Now Playing in theaters and safe and secure in a place some pretty parts and some streaming on HBOMax thrilling sequences, but both where they can plot their next sequels could have been combined into sections moves, but it’s also more thrilling to see them out of a proper follow-up and no one would have in the open, more vulnerable in some respects but noticed. In my opinion, the sequels, especially also stronger too given the unpredictability that “Revolutions,” have done nothing but blunt the comes with being exposed. “The Matrix,” as an idea, is thrilling because impact of the 1999 original and turn it into a it represents a world without boundaries or subpar franchise. “The Meh-trix,” if you will. Which brings us to the fourth entry, “The Matrix Resurrections,” the first new film in 18 years, and also the first in the series to be solely directed by Lana Wachowski. Lana isn’t lacking for ideas, and for the first 45 minutes or so, you’re hooked. Thomas Anderson is alive, and a renowned video game designer who created a trilogy of globally beloved video games called “The Matrix.” But there’s a fly in the ointment, a nagging suspicion that his gaming creations are alive and trying to communicate with him. Forget Marvel’s multiverse. Lana thrusts us straight into a “Matrix” metaverse. At first blush, it would appear as if Wachowski too might sense that the original trilogy didn’t conclude in a proper manner, which for a fan is a tantalizing proposition. I loved the early back-and-forth inside baseball name-checking Warner Brothers and dishing on the genesis of sequels as cash-grab enterprises. I loved watching Keanu Reeves stare wide-eyed into his past and struggle to make sense of his future. But then the wheels start to wobble before eventually flying off the wagon, and suddenly “Resurrections” comes to a grinding halt, trapped by its own interminable loop of glitchy nostalgia. Instead of saying anything new, Wachowski edits in flashes of past footage or recreates iconic moments altogether. She tinkers with established characters, replacing some (Morpheus and Agent Smith, most notably) with other actors who also don’t seem completely sure of how to get wherever BURY IT ALREADY: Neo (Keanu Reeves, R) and Trinity (Carrie-Anne Moss) return after 18 years it is Wachowski wants them to go. so fans can discover their fate in “The Matrix Resurrections”

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REVIEWS

PROFILES

MUSIC WEEK

Gimme gimme gimme

Talking with Andy Bell ahead of Erasure’s North American tour kickoff. By Josh Bradley

INTERVIEW

“I love the theaters because I just feel like that’s kind of my spiritual home, really.”

SANDRA DOHNERT

fter limited success in Depeche Mode, Yazoo, I saw that when you guys were in Europe, you and The Assembly in the ‘80s, Vince Clarke played the O2. In the U.S, it looks like you guys put an ad in British weekly music maga- are mainly gonna be in more intimate places, zine Melody Maker, scouting out a lead singer like theaters. Do you prefer to rock out in arefor a new project that would hopefully put him nas like the O2, or do you prefer the intimate on the map for good. In the end, he went with touch *Andy Bell chuckles* of theaters? Peterborough-based singer—and at-the-time I love the theaters because I just feel like that’s women’s shoe salesman—Andy Bell, who cited kind of my spiritual home, really. And you know, Clarke as his biggest hero. I like to think of all the It’s safe to say that productions and things Clarke and Bell’s colthat have gone on before laboration didn’t flop. we played there. I don’t Erasure w/Bag Raiders (DJ Set) Erasure became no know, it feels like a more Sunday, Jan. 16. 8 p.m. $29 & up. Mahaffey Theater, 400 1st St. S, St. Petersburg strangers to the U.K. sacred space to me, the 727-892-5798. themahaffey.com charts, and even scored theaters. But the arenas, a few hit albums in the as well. And the nice thing U.S, including I Say I Say I Say, which peaked is, it’s kind of a different feeling entirely, because at no. 18 on the Billboard 200—not to mention you could only see the first 20 rows, I suppose, of no. 1 over in England. people and then when it’s that big, it’s very aweClarke and Bell are still musically tight inspiring. I mean, you can do like, bigger gigs for after 35 years, and are about to embark on their more money and less shows you know what I mean? first U.S. tour since 2018. Before St. Pete gets a It’s quite hard to get a balance in between live taste of the duo’s latest album, The Neon, the two, because you want that satisfaction of Bell got on the phone with Creative Loafing being in the theater, but at the same time, you Tampa Bay to talk about touring with Blondie, don’t want to break your back doing the shows, being an LGBTQ+ icon in a much more conser- you know? vative time, and his time as a choirboy while growing up in England. Read a full Q&A with When you were in school, you were a choirBell below. boy. Do you remember what drove you to join choir in the first place? You and Vince haven’t toured together since It just seemed like a natural thing, really. I 2018, so this new tour must be exhilarating think they were always on the lookout for peofor you, right? ple, anyway. So, when I was in the choir, it was It’s great, yeah! I mean, I’m glad that we’ve done only junior school that I did it and then, when I it this way as well, because it was postponed went to grammar school, they did have a choir, probably two or three times in the beginning. So, which was attached to the cathedral, but because now we’ve got it. We’ve I wasn’t christened or got it in three parts— anything, I didn’t sign we’ve already done the all the forms and things U.K. part, and now that you had to sign out. we’re doing the North So, I ended up not being American section, and in the choir in my later then we’ll be going to years. I don’t know if I South America. And regret it or not, because then we have a couple more shows in the U.K., I would have had to have gone to religious school I think in July time, so yeah, it’s nice to assess on Sunday, you know. I kind of made up my the situation in between also having played the mind about that when I was probably about 11 U.K., but we have a brilliant reception at home, or 12. So, I love the experience of going into the so I’m kind of hoping it’s gonna be similar-ish church and the feeling of being in there, but not in North America. necessarily the lessons that were taught to me.

BLUE SAVANNAH: Andy Bell at Mahaffey Theater in 2018. Was there a moment that you knew that this was what you wanted to do with your life? I think it’s always…I wouldn’t say taking it for granted, but it’s always been in the background, singing all the time. You know, like singing in bed, singing over Christmas, going to other people’s houses and doing carols and stuff like that. And I always wanted to be in a band, so I think it was all second nature to me, but I didn’t really think that it would be my career. I didn’t really put two and two together. Even though I’d moved to London to join a band, I didn’t really necessarily think that I would be famous for a band. You know, I thought it might be something else. It kinda just happened. Well, yeah. I mean, you do make things happen

on your own. But I remember, one of my flatmates was this girl called Jill. We’d moved down to London together, and she found the first band that I joined. Just in a music shop window in London, where we lived, and this was in Ealing. And so, we were like, in a band for about a year— four of us, and then I persuaded the bass player to be in the band. We formed a duo, and then after that, we really had a couple of gigs. Then I met Vince through the adverts and my band member Pierre, he just shook my hand and says, “congratulations,” you know. Now, it must have been rough being a gay icon in the late ‘80s-’90s, because that was when the world was more conservative about that. Um, I don’t know…I suppose you get used to the continued on page 34

cltampa.com | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | 33

continued from page 33 level of supposed homophobia, because you’re prepared for it in some ways. You know, you do get shocked by reactions sometimes, when you’re going around playing gigs. I think mostly we were safe, but we did have some adverse reactions in different places, including Holland, where we thought would be very progressive. But once you get outside of Amsterdam, you know, it’s the same like anywhere else, really—quite conservative. And it’s the same everywhere really, you know, once you get outside the big cities. Even within the safety of the big cities, you’re not necessarily safe. So you have to keep aware. London was quite a rough place to be in in the 80s—like anywhere else—but we had skinhead groups and stuff chasing you down the underground railway, so you had to be very vigilant the whole time. But at the same time, we achieved so much. There were huge political rallies going on. You know, we’ve managed to change the age of consent and stuff—we will recognize a move. We did a lot, but we had loads of camaraderie there, and we stopped with each other, you know?

makes you feel great. You know, you feel like you’ve kind of made it. Sure. So, how did The Neon come about? That came about through Vince writing on synth in his studio in Brooklyn, and then me going around to his house, picking up the mic and singing along to the tracks that he created. And then, just taking it from there, really. Just kind of building up the vocal harmonies, and then taking all of that away with us, and then going off to Atlanta, trying to relate all of those melodies and stuff into lyrics, and then actually doing the vocals there, and then the whole thing was mixed in London. So for us, it was kind of like, almost like an escape back to your teenage years, when you first found the music, because it’s quite easy in the industry to become like that. But you’re on a hamster wheel going round and round, so sometimes it’s just nice to get off and kind of reappraise your love of music.

INTERVIEW

Let’s go back to music. It’s no secret that you’re an ABBA fan. Have you listened to the new album, Voyage, yet? I listened to it in parts, so I haven’t listened to the whole thing. It’s OK, but I wasn’t really grabbed like I was before. But I think the main reason probably being because we wore it out a long time ago, from hearing their music so much. So I think once you’ve done a cover of the bands, in some ways, it—I wouldn’t say ruins the bands for you, but because you’ve dissected the bands, it makes you realize more where they’re coming from as musicians, rather than being a band. Fair. You also cite Blondie as one of your influences. So, when you toured with Debbie Harry in the 2000s, do you think that was a hallmark of your life? It was really amazing just to be, you know, hanging out with one of your idols and sitting backstage on the steps and smoking cigarettes and having discussions. It just felt really like it does when you’re with one of your mentors and in some ways, it’s kind of a homecoming, but it

34 | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | cltampa.com

Though you’ve devoted most of your time to Erasure in recent years, do you have any plans for a third installation in your solo Torsten series? Hopefully yeah, we do. We said we would make it easier on ourselves, and not do so many words, speaking words, because I find it quite tricky. So, we’re probably going to do it more like a poet and a singer. So, we’ll have Barney reading out his parts, or other people reading out their parts, and I’ll be singing songs in between, like a kind of troubadour, I suppose. Cool. So, if you ended up not impressing Vince Clarke in the ‘80s, what do you think Andy Bell would be doing today? Um, to be honest, I think I would have been in another band, God knows who. Whether we would have been heard of or not, I don’t know. Or otherwise, I mean, I would have always been involved with music. I’m always going to be involved with music or theater. I suppose if I

hadn’t gotten anywhere like that—by chance, maybe I would have tried to have gone back to university or something to get, I don’t know, teacher training for juniors, children or something. Although I really like to tell stories and things to young people. I would assume that if you went back to school for teaching, you would teach music. Well, I can’t read music! So that would be quite tough. I’m not sure, I was thinking maybe English. I don’t know. You know, Sting was an English teacher at one point, and The Beatles couldn’t read music in the very beginning. Oh, there you go. Dedication, I suppose. What advice do you have to offer to young, upand-coming artists, especially ones who are members of the LGBT community? Right, I would tell them that it’s about how you look. It’s about how you feel, it’s about who you are, it’s about having good friends around you, and it’s about sticking to your guns and believing in what you’re doing, and who you are.

“We just need to remember that we’re all equal in the end.”

SANDRA DOHNERT

LGBT culture has come a long way ever since Erasure made it big. What do you think parts of that culture still need improvement the most? I think that the communication between us, kind of going across party lines. And also, for lesbians to interact with gay men and vice versa. And for us to kind of embrace much more, like the Latino and Black communities, and especially with transgender people. Mainly to not so much get into these arguments of how we describe ourselves. We just need to remember that we’re all equal in the end.

In fact, I remember you saying that The Neon was all about looking back into the early days of the band, right?

Yeah, well, I think even pre-the band days. It reminded me of the excitement of going to cut your first singles and stuff like that, and when you hear tracks on the radio for the first time.

NERVES OF STEEL: Vince Clarke at Mahaffey Theater in 2018.

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THU JANUARY 06–WED JANUARY 12

The Pauses JOHN DEEB

By Stephanie Powers & Ray Roa C

CL Recommends

FRI 07

C Al Di Meola Jazz and world-music fusion guitarist Al Di Meola on is back at the Cap, returning after playing the Clearwater venue four years ago. The Grammy award-winner—and buddy to the Chick Corea who lived nearby—has been at it four decades now, with 30 albums under his belt including his 2020 take on The Beatles, Across the Universe. Capitol Theatre doesn’t require masks (only recommends them) but that Omicron variant is moving faster than Di Meola’s fingers on the fretboard, so you make the call. (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater) C E-Turn and Leisure Chief (The Crossfade) w/Mike Mass and Katara A new collaboration out of Orlando called The Crossfade—featuring rapper-vocalist E-Turn—starts its Florida mini-tour in Tampa. E-Turn’s emotional performances connect “the gap between gritty rap and soulful vocals” with influences ranging from Mos Def to Stevie Nicks. The emcee is backed by the fabulous funk, soul and R&B ensemble Leisure Chief, so you know things are going to get hot. Best of the Bay-winning emcee Mike Mass and jazz trio Katara team up to fill out the stacked lineup with a Bay area bandMC combination to compliment Crossfade. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

Eric Lindell If you missed Eric Lindell’s set opening for Galactic in November, you’ll definitely want to head to North Tampa when the blue-eyed soul musician hits Skipper’s, where he last played in 2018 for a solo show. Fans of Van Morrison will like Lindell’s New Orleans roots style which got him signed to Chicago’s infamous Alligator Records in 2005. Check in with the venue before you go, its COVID-19 protocols are constantly changing. Regardless of the rules, the least you can do is wear a mask. (Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa) Dave Meder Jazz composer, pianist and University of North Texas music professor Dave Meder gets an assist from musicians Marty Jaffe (bass) and Jonathan Barber (drums) for his “Songs and Stories Trio” performance, which pays tribute to everything from gospel standards to deconstructed versions of Thelonius Monk. Most importantly, Meder will dip into his latest album, this year’s Unamuno Songs and Stories inspired by 20th-century Basque-Spanish philosopher and antifacist Miguel de Unamuno. Because it’s part of St. Petersburg College, masks are required at all performances at Palladium. (Hough Hall at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg)

SAT 08

C Arm the Poor w/City Mouse/ Rutterkin/Articles It’s been about a dozen years since Tampa band Arm the Poor hit the stage to share its poppy ska-punk sound for the PBR-drinking set, but this reunion won’t

be the only high point at this VFW show. The flyer says Bay area punk band Rutterkin has a surprise, and promoter Chewy Hemphill of Savage Beat told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the secret is a Guided By Voices cover set. Miski Dee Rodriguez’s City Mouse project rounds out the bill alongside Gainesville poppunk band Articles. The flyer also advertises a negative COVID test or proof of vax, but Hemphill said that won’t actually be the case. Vaccines and masks, however, are strongly encouraged by Savage Beat and every band on the bill. (VFW Post 39, St. Petersburg) C Inpsychlopedia: Vol. 1 w/Alfred Banks/Marcel P Black/Psych Montano/ Albert J. Robinson/DJ Qeys/DJ Faz When you meet Tampa rapper Psych Montano, he’s more than likely going to ask you for your Instagram handle, so it makes sense to see him launching this “Inpsychlopedia” party which also functions as a networking event and showcase for out-of-town artists to perform alongside locals. For the first installment, Montano has tapped deeply introspective New Orleans emcee Alfred Banks, an alum of the Crescent City’s Grassroots showcase, plus Oklahoma’s Marcel P Black to visit Ybor City’s most active rock club. DJs Qeys and Faz will spin in the courtyard where there’ll be art and food, too. (Crowbar, Ybor City) C The Pauses w/Hides/Luuls It’s been 10 years since The Pauses caught our attention with it’s debut album A Cautionary Tale. Last month, Tampa’s Pohgoh helped the Orlando band celebrate at Will’s Pub causing

some major FOMO over here. Lucky for us, the indie-rock trio brings its “beep boop rock from Mickeytown, U.S.A.” back to Tampa this weekend, marking the first time The Pauses have hit West River venue Hooch and Hive. Another first is happening this weekend: the debut performance from brand new indie-band Hides, arriving with its first single “Friend,” an impressive amuse-bouche that will definitely get you hungry for more. If you go: “All concert goers must provide proof of a negative COVID19 test within 72 hours prior to entry, in order to attend this show. As an alternative, proof of vaccination may be voluntarily presented by the attendee, instead of a negative COVID-19 test result.” (Hooch and Hive, Tampa) C Speak Easy w/P.M Tiger/In The Pocket You already support local bands, but how about your local grilled cheese chef? Here’s a chance to do both at a Tampa house show where Jake Yaakov, aka Grilled Cheese Guy, is in the kitchen for a show headlined by exceptional and yachty pop-rock band Speak Easy which is joined by a somewhat rowdier rock outfit, P.M. Tiger and loungeready jazz band In the Pocket. Donations are encouraged, and you’ll have to DM @pastahousetampa on Instagram for the address. (Pasta House, Tampa)

SUN 09

Dave Stryker There aren’t a lot of things Dave Stryker hasn’t done, but his latest

continued on page 38

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Blake Daniels album, As We Are, did see the jazz guitar master trying out recording in a quartet (featuring John Patitucci, frequent collaborator with the late Chick Corea, nonetheless). This matinee set finds the 64-year-old Stanley Turrentine sideman in familiar digs (he’s played for Tampa Jazz Club twice), this time alongside Florida greats saxophonist Jack Wilkins, bassist Mark Neuenschwander, pianist Per Danielsson and drummer Walt Hubbard. (HCC Ybor Mainstage Theatre, Ybor City)

TUE 11

C Melody Artisans of the Crooked Thumb: Six Year Anniversary: Blake Daniels w/Liam Bauman/Leon Majcen/ Taylor Raynor/Alex Borst/Max Watson/ Deb Ruby/Adam Randall Two weeks ago, Crooked Thumb’s Melody Artisans songwriter night kicked off the new year with songs about “Beginnings.” On Tuesday it looks back six years to celebrate an anniversary for the series, but also keeps an eye on the future by inviting three of Tampa Bay’s brightest young songwriters—Blake Daniels, Liam Bauman and Leon Majcen—to anchor an eight-artist lineup. (Crooked Thumb Brewery, Safety Harbor)

WED 12

$4, $5 & $6 Liquor, Beer & Wine $8 Hand-Crafted Cocktails 38 | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | cltampa.com

Ledisi Sings Nina Movie buffs might recognize Ledisi from the Oscar-winning film “Selma” in which she played gospel singer Mahalia Jackson. Currently, Ledisi pays tribute to another legend: Nina Simone. The Oaklandraised performer brings her “Ledisi Sings Nina” tour to St. Petersburg where she last played in February of 2020—the same year she won her first Grammy (Best Traditional R&B Performance” for the song “Anything for You”). FYI, the “Meet and Greet” VIP package requires proof of vaccination, regular seating does not. (Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg)

Also playing: C Rock the Park Tampa: The Wandering Hours w/Summer Hoop/Guianna B Thursday, Jan. 6, 6:30 p.m. No cover. Curtis Hixon Waterfront Park, Tampa Fantastical Tigers w/Emily Turnage/Deb Ruby Friday, Jan. 8, 8 p.m. No cover. Green Bench Brewing, St. Petersburg. Jenny Parrott Friday, Jan. 7, 8 p.m. No cover. Shuffle, Tampa Sunset Smooth Jazz Series Friday, Jan. 7, 6 p.m. $10 & up. The Sunset Room, Tampa Swarm Friday, Jan. 7. 10 p.m. Free. The Ritz, Ybor City Hope Darling w/Alma Vertical/Frankie Raye Saturday, Jan. 8. 8 p.m. $7. New World Music Hall, Tampa First Saturday Jazz: Joe Breidenstein Trio Saturday, Jan. 8, 8 p.m. No cover. Independent Bar and Cafe, Tampa C The Fabulous Thunderbirds Sunday, Jan. 9. 8 p.m. $32.50-$50. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater Soul Food Sunday: Jackson Harpe Collective Sunday, 3 p.m. No cover, reservations recommended. Ella’s Americana Folk Art Cafe, Tampa Pamela Jo Band Sunday, Jan. 16, 5:30 p.m. No cover. Biergarten at New World Brewery, Tampa Mana Saxophone Quartet Sunday, Jan. 9. 3 p.m. Free (but donation requested). Peace Memorial Presbyterian Church, Clearwater C Sunday School for Sinners: Stillhouse Shakers Sunday, Jan. 16, 6:30 p.m. No cover. Independent Bar and Cafe, Tampa C Marc Broussard Tuesday, Jan. 11. 8 p.m. $20-$40. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater Submit your concert to the CL event calendar via cltampa.com/tampa/eventsearch

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According to pop star Kesha, “2022 is going to be it,” and we’re all just going to have to believe her. Tampa’s lucky enough to get a dose of the “Tik Tok” singer on March 29, at the Seminole Hard Rock’s Event Center. Tickets for her upcoming show are already on sale and can be purchased onTicketmaster. General admission starts at $60, while the ultimate VIP runs for upwards of $400 and includes a virtual meet-and-greet with Kesha, individual photo ops, early entry and various exclusive VIP collectibles. If 2022’s Tampa show isn’t enough Kesha for you, snag a ticket and hitch a ride south for Kesha’s Weird + Wonderful Rainbow Ride—a

four-day party cruise that runs from Miami to the Bahamas. The only other Florida show that isn’t on a boat takes place in Hollywood on March 30. Tampa Bay hasn’t been graced with Kesha’s presence since her 2016 gig at Ritz Ybor with her band The Creepies, but fans can expect to hear her classic pop sound at next year’s highly anticipated show. Kesha’s latest single Drop Dead” featuring Travis Barker and Grandson, will most likely make an appearance on the setlist. See more of Josh Bradley’s weekly roundup of new, canceled and postponed concerts below.—Kyla Fields

The Grapes (fka Alexander and The Grapes) w/chlorinefields/Witch Hiatus Saturday, Jan. 15. 8 p.m. $5. Hooch and Hive, Tampa

7 p.m. $20-$79. Sims Park, New Port Richey

Fit For An Autopsy w/Enterprise Earth/ Ingested/Signs of the Swarm/Great American Ghost Tuesday, Feb. 1. 8 p.m. $22-$25. Crowbar, Ybor City

Dance With The Dead w/Magic Sword Wednesday, Apr. 27. 8 p.m. $25. Crowbar, Ybor City

Darude Saturday, Feb. 12. 10 p.m. Free-$10 for guaranteed entry. The Ritz, Ybor City Murphy’s Law w/TBA Thursday, Feb. 17. 6 p.m. $17.77. Brass Mug, Tampa Chase Bryant w/Drew Baldridge Saturday, Apr. 2. 7 p.m. $10-$60. Sims Park, New Port Richey Night Ranger w/Fire & Ice Sunday, Apr. 3.

Brett Newski w/Geri X/TBA Thursday, Apr. 14. 7:30 p.m. $15. Crowbar, Ybor City

Nothing,Nowhere w/Poorstacy/carolesdaughter/guccihighwaters/Snarls Friday, Apr. 29. 6 p.m. $25. Orpheum, Ybor City Primus w/Battles Wednesday, May 4. 8 p.m. $39.50-$85.50. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg One Night Of Queen Sunday, May 8. 7 p.m. $39-$49. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg

ATTENTION MUSICIANS, DJ’S, BANDS, RECORDING ARTISTS

BENZ-MUSIC a division of BENZ TALENT AGENCY

IS NOW ACCEPTING SUBMISSIONS FOR MUSIC (ALL STYLES AND GENRES) FOR AGENCY REPRESENTATION CONSIDERATION. BENZ-MUSIC REPRESENTS MUSICIANS AND ARTISTS FOR LIVE BOOKING, SESSION WORK, SYNC-LICENSING AND BRAND EXPANSION. PLEASE SUBMIT EPK’S & DEMOS USING WWW.WETRANSFER.COM TO : SHAWN@BENZTALENT.COM cltampa.com | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | 39

Where the vinyl is: a list of Bay area record stores

It’s no secret that locally-owned and operated businesses are taking a hit from coronavirus closures and curfews. Some Tampa Bay record stores have adapted by offering curbside pickup, free shipping and private shopping during the COVID-19 pandemic. Stock up on some vinyl, and spend money like all your favorite concerts are getting canceled. Just make sure to call ahead of time to see what’s up at the shop. Big shouts to CL reader Chuck who updated us on these listings.—Kyla Fields

ArtPool Records (2030 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-433-5195, artpoolrules.com

Blue Moon Antiques, Books & Music (1413 Cleveland St., Clearwater) 727-443-7444

Asylum Sights and Sounds (6566 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-384-1221

The Clearwater Record Shop (1610 N. Hercules Ave., Clearwater) 727-755-1201, clearwaterrecordshow.com

Bananas Records (2887 22nd Ave N., St. Petersburg) 727-327-4616 ext. 1, bananasrecords.com Bananas Records Warehouse (2226 16th Ave. N., St. Petersburg) 727 327-4616 ext. 2, bananasrecords.com

40 | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | cltampa.com

Daddy Kool Records (The Factory, 800 28th St. S, St. Petersburg) 727-822-5665, daddykool.com Disc Exchange (6712 Central Ave., St. Petersburg) 727-343-5845, thediscexchange.com

Dunedin Records & Audio (757 Main St., Dunedin) 727-423-4108, dunedinrecords.com Green Shift Music & Comics (5713 N. Nebraska Ave., Tampa) 813-238-4177, greenshiftmusicandcomics.com Hello Darlin’ Records (Roving VW Camper) 727-479-6783, hellodarlinrecords.com Kingfish Records (Main Store) (26024-B US Highway 19 N., Clearwater) 727-3515177, kingfishrecords.com

Planet Retro Records (226 Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. St. N., St. Petersburg) 727218-7434, planetretrorecords.com Sound Exchange Tampa (14246 N. Nebraska Ave., Tampa) 813-978-9316, soundexchangetampabay.com Sound Exchange Pinellas Park (66th Street N and 86th Avenue N., Pinellas Park) 727-545-0042, soundexchangetampabay. com

Microgroove (906 N. Florida Ave., Tampa) 813-667-7089, microgroovetampa.co

Steelworker Records (708 W. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., Tampa) 813-666-4933, steelworkerrecords.com

Mojo Books & Records (2540 E. Fowler Ave., Tampa) 813-971-9717, mojotampa.com

Unique Music & Collectables (123 Main St., Dunedin) 727-240-0757

Patrick’s Book and Record Store (6629 U.S.-19,New Port Richey) 727-203-3284, patricksbooksandmusic.com

Vintage Vinyl (201 Douglas Road E, Suite 8, Oldsmar) 727-491-3800, vintagevinyl.biz

cltampa.com | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | 41

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Word play

Dan Savage has a new kids-book style journal of sex advice. By Lee DeVito sleeves and gig posters for his band. That led to eventually becoming the paper’s art director, “in sort of a ‘fake-it-til-you-make-it’ way,” he says, and the task of coming up with an illustration for Savage’s column each week on a short deadline. Newton says he initially took a literal approach to the column’s illustrations; if a column was about a couple filming themselves during sex, for example, he would just illustrate that. “And I don’t think I was ever entirely happy with that,” he says. “I’ve always felt that the column already has plenty of visceral details, and it’s plenty vivid—it doesn’t really need the illustration to add to that part of the content.” At a certain point, he realized that drawing anthropomorphic animals had more of a universal appeal, rather than focusing on trying to be inclusive by depicting people of different ethnicities and genders. He says another

INTERVIEW

letter. They wound up doing two words for each letter, to fill empty spaces created by the layout design process. Newton says that the format of the book allows for Savage to distill 30 years of wisdom into essay form. “I think it’s nice to hear him speak his own mind directly rather than in response to somebody else’s query,” Newton says. “I’m so used to reading him in the column that I just felt like, ‘Oh, you’ve got this now, you know all this stuff.’ And I think it’s a refreshing way of accessing what he has to say.” Savage says beyond the book, column, and podcast, that he’s working on a television project that he hopes will come to fruition soon. But he’s careful to give credit where it’s due when it comes to the impact of his column on language. “That’s been gratifying, to have that sort of impact on the English language,” he says. “But a lot of what is going to outlive me about Savage Love was the genius of my readers, not the author of the column.” Savage Love from A to Z: Advice on Sex and Relationships, Dating and Mating, Exes and Extras is available now from Sasquatch Books. This story originally appeared in our sibling publication Detroit Metro Times.

ILLUSTRATIONS BY JOE NEWTON

hings have changed considerably since Dan Savage started writing his sex advice column “Savage Love” in Seattle’s alt-weekly The Stranger 30 years ago. The column is now syndicated in more than 50 papers across North America (including Creative Loafing Tampa Bay), led to a longrunning Savage Lovecast podcast, and has even spawned its own veritable dictionary of terms, many of which have entered the mainstream lexicon. There’s “GGG,” or “good, giving, game”—the advice that sexual partners should strive to be good in bed, giving of equal time and pleasure, and game for anything, within reason. (The dating app OkCupid even launched a “How GGG are you?” quiz.) There’s “monogamish,” or Savage’s description of his own long-term marriage. (The phrase was repeated by Anne Hathaway’s character in the movie “The Intern.”) There’s also “DTMFA,” or “dump the motherucker already,” and the related “ITMFA,” or “impeach the motherfucker already” (see U.S. Rep. Rashida Tlaib’s first day in office during the Trump administration); “pegging” (when a woman fucks a man in the ass with a strap-on dildo; model Cara Delevigne attended this year’s Met Gala with the words “Peg the Patriarchy” emblazoned on her outfit); and “santorum,” named after homophobic U.S. Senator Rick Santorum, which thanks to a Savage Love reader contest now refers to “the frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex,” at least when you search for the term on Google. Savage credits the creation of the terminology to the rapport he developed with his readers over the years. “People do talk about sex with their close friends, and develop a code, you know, a certain lingo, when they’re talking about sexual relationships,” he says by phone. “That’s really kind of what Savage Love became with my readers.” The terms are collected in Savage Love from A to Z: Advice on Sex and Relationships, Dating and Mating, Exes and Extras, a new book by Savage out now from Sasquatch Books. Presented in a children’s book style, the 148-page collection of essays and illustrations covers the themes and concepts explored by Savage Love over the past three decades, drawing from more than 3,500 reader letters. The idea for the book came from longtime Savage Love illustrator Joe Newton, who first started working with Savage at The Stranger as the paper’s art director about 20 years ago. Newton says he first started at the paper designing ads, having taught himself design by making record

breakthrough came when he realized one particular column was broadly about the subject of personal accountability rather than the particulars of the reader’s sex question. He drew a dog picking up its own poo, with the phrase “A is for Accountability.” Newton says he realized that Savage Love was about these broader themes, too. “I feel like that’s really what Dan is good at,” he says. “He’s talking about bigger concepts, bigger relationship concepts, and not just the specificity of whatever this particular question entails.” Savage says he’s often pleasantly surprised when he sees what Newton comes up with each week. “He has a wonderful kind of classic children’s book illustrator style that he brings to illustrate the column,” he says. “And there’s something kind of wonderful about the tension there, between the illos and the way they look and feel and the column and what we’re talking about. There’s always a joke in them. They’re tremendously witty, and if you look at them carefully you’ll catch double meanings or double entendres.” Newton says he first approached Savage for the idea to collaborate on a book together about two years ago. He started by giving Savage a list of terms from the column assigned to each

SAGE SAVAGE: 30 years of experience went into Dan Savage's new book.

cltampa.com | JANUARY 6 - 12, 2022 | 43

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By Dan Savage

My boyfriend is male, I am female, and we’ve been together almost three years. We live alone in separate homes, but spend about three or four nights a week together. We’re both fully vaxxed and boosted, and we mask in public, etc. On the Monday before Christmas, I started feeling mild symptoms but tested negative. My boyfriend felt fine, and we spent a few nights together that week. On the morning of Christmas Eve, I took a second at-home test, and it’s positive. So, I canceled plans to see a friend that afternoon and spoke to my boyfriend. Our Christmas Eve plans involved dinner with some of his family members. An hour later he calls and says he tested negative and that he thinks the best thing would be for me to isolate alone on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. He was still planning to go see his family. I burst into tears. He’d already been exposed and if his foremost concern was protecting his family, the logical thing to do would be to minimize contact with them, not me. I couldn’t believe he was going to leave me at home alone over Christmas when we’d already had so much close contact that week. And he knows that spending holidays together as a couple is important to me! He called me back, we argued, and then he offered to have me come over to his house to sleep in the guestroom. Once I’m there, he changes his mind, and we wind up sharing his bed. The next morning, I wanted to clear the air and he told me that he was angry about my behavior. He thinks I was being selfish and risked further exposing him. I am really confused and hurt by the way everything has unfolded. Which one of us is being an asshole here?—Flamingly Upset Couple Knows Conflict Over Virus Is Dumb

on all of us,” said Dr. De-Lin. “Many of us longed to see our families and friends and were devastated when those plans were once again upended this year. Furthermore, the guidance on rapid testing, as well as the guidance on what vaccinated folks can and can’t do, has been constantly changing. So, it’s no wonder that her boyfriend still wanted to find a way to see his family and thought he could do so safely, and that the writer didn’t want to be alone on Christmas when I’m sure she was already feeling so isolated.” And to put things in perspective, FUCKCOVID, it’s not like you punched a flight attendant or said, “Let’s Go, Brandon!” to Joe and Jill Biden on Christmas Eve. All you did was get upset. And you were right about one thing: If your boyfriend was gonna see anyone on Christmas Eve, it should’ve been you. Considering how much time you’d spent together after you became symptomatic (but before testing positive), you could reasonably argue that if you were going to expose him, you’d already exposed him. So, in the spirit of harm reduction, he could’ve and should’ve canceled his plans with his family and spent the holiday with you instead. And that’s what he did, right? So, as much as the suggestion that you spend Christmas alone may have upset you, you didn’t spend Christmas alone, right? So, maybe give your asshole boyfriend some credit for that? All that said, your boyfriend could reasonably argue that you could’ve and should’ve isolated yourself at the onset of your symptoms and not spent multiple nights with him before you predictably tested positive. But if you were to let go of your anger about him suggesting you spend Christmas alone, maybe that would inspire him to let go of his anger about not seeing his family. Because at the end of the day, FUCKCOVID, it was same desire for human contact that prompted you to put your boyfriend at risk (by hanging out with him after the onset of symptoms) and prompted your boyfriend to contemplate putting his family at risk (by hanging out with them after a significant exposure). So, recognizing your mutual assholery, maybe—in the spirit of the holiday—you two can forgive each other and move the fuck on. While I had Dr. De-Lin on the line, I asked her for some advice for all of us—all us assholes—on getting through the next wave of this seeminglynever-ending pandemic. “We have ways that we can prevent the spread of the Omicron variant: get vaccinated and boosted, isolate when positive or after a high-risk exposure, wear masks in indoor settings, and keep gatherings outdoors,” said Dr. De-Lin. “The COVID Omicron variant is not only significantly more infectious than any variant we’ve seen so far, but it’s also coming at the worst possible time: the holiday season. So, it’s running

SAVAGE LOVE

“I’m not going to assign the title of ‘asshole’ to either the letter writer, or her boyfriend,” said Dr. Stacy De-Lin, M.D., a board-certified physician who shares sound science about COVID-19 on her invaluable Instagram account (@stacydelin_md). “But there is a clear public health answer to this question: the writer should have isolated away from her boyfriend as soon as she knew she was positive, and her boyfriend, having known he had a significant exposure, should not have attended any family gatherings.” While Dr. De-Lin doesn’t feel comfortable assigning the title of “asshole” to either of you, FUCKCOVID, I’m gonna go ahead and cut the asshole in half here—in a display of Solomonic wisdom—and award the title of “asshole” to both of you. But you shouldn’t feel too bad about that, FUCKCOVID, seeing as this neverending pandemic is bringing out the asshole in all of us. “In addition to addressing public health, we also need to address the incredible mental health toll that nearly two years of a pandemic has taken

In the mid-to-late 1980s when I was a toddler, my father had an affair. For some reason, he confessed to my mother in the early 1990s. She was furious, and they separated for two years. My sister and I stayed with our mom during the week, and we shared a room in our father’s two-bedroom apartment on the weekends. During this time my mother frequently and loudly badmouthed him and would call him “the man in the apartment.” After two years they got back together, probably “for the kids,” but my mom constantly held the infidelity over my father’s head. My sister and I were aware of the former mistress’s name, as my mother would bring her up whenever we passed by a motel or at other random moments. She still refers to my father as “the man in the apartment.” I hated this and I thought we all would have been better off had they just divorced. Their histrionics (her histrionics) and some incredibly punitive nuns instilled in me, a heterosexual male, the idea that boys are stupid and bad, and girls are mean and inflict punishment. I developed shame about being male coupled with a resentment of women, issues I’m still working through. Now my parents are well into their 70s and my mother has actually gotten worse. My mother somehow found his former mistress online and uses her photo as her screensaver. She brings up the affair constantly and bullies my father about it daily. This has been going on for 30 years! Right now, I’m out of town for the holidays with my mom and my sister and my dad told me he might move out before she returns. Is this salvageable? Should I insist he stay? For the first half of my life (I’m nearly 40) I was firmly on “Team Mom.” That has radically shifted in recent years. My dad can be a real jackass, but JOE NEWTON

Vaxxed and confused

rampant through the country and the world, and hospitals are already at the breaking point, making it more important than ever to avoid catching and spreading the virus.” And as difficult as it might seem right now— and it seems mighty difficult—taking the long view will help us get through this. “It’s important to remember that this wave, and the pandemic itself, will get much better, and we will be able to gather with our families and friends again in the ways that we used to, without fear,” said Dr. De-Lin. “In the meantime, I hope that the letter writer and her boyfriend, and all of us, can be patient and forgiving with each other in these challenging times.”

he has carried this cross for too long and doesn’t deserve this.—Sad And Disappointed Seeing Ongoing Nightmare “The victim of the affair is not always the victim of the marriage,” as famed psychotherapist and author Esther Perel says, and your parents’ marriage may be the best single example of a marriage where the cheater is (or became) the victim. Yes, SADSON, your dad wronged your mom when he had that affair 30 years ago. (An affair he should’ve kept his mouth shut about.) But if your mom couldn’t bring herself to forgive your dad and/ or couldn’t stop punishing him—or, worse yet, if she only took him back so she could punish every day for the rest of his life—then your mom long ago ceded the moral high ground to your dad. Someone who can’t forgive infidelity in a reasonable period of time (like, say, during a two-year separation) has no business taking a cheating spouse back. And someone who can’t resist involving their children in a long, vindictive, self-pitying campaign to destroy their cheating spouse has no business having children in the first place. Your dad should move out, your mom should get a mental health assessment, and you and your sister should stop—finally— allowing your mother to abuse you like this. P.S. I hope there were other women. When I was a teenagers, my head was filled with fantasies of sadism and domination. I was convinced I was a monster, but found your column and every once in a while, you answered a question about hardcore BDSM. No matter how (consensually) cruel and unusual someone’s fantasies were, you always spoke non-judgmentally about best practices in BDSM safety and wished them well. Yours was the first voice to ever tell me, even indirectly, that my sexual fantasies weren’t the mark of a broken and irredeemably evil mind. It was the first step on the road to learning to love myself. Your column basically saved my life.—Savage’s Advice, Dude, It Saved Me Thank you SADISM. I hope my column didn’t just make you feel better about your fantasies, but also inspired you to go find consenting adult partners who wanted to realize them with and for you! Send mail to questions@savagelove.net, follow @FakeDanSavage on Twitter, and get more columns, podcasts, books, merch and more at savage.love.

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creative loafing puzzler PUMPING IRONY 63 65 by Merl Reagle 68 ACROSS 70 1 Suspect’s trump card 71 6 Mr. Smart Guy 9 Rascal 75 14 Lights-out notes 77 18 Antisocial type 81 19 Go on breathing 82 21 Claudette in It Happened One 86 Night 87 22 Melange 88 23 Moola 24 Irrigation method 25 Ways to your heart 89 26 Richard who 90 played “Jaws” in The Spy Who 95 Loved Me 97 27 Definition of “pumping irony,” 98 part 1 99 31 Pro’s prop 32 Fitness legend 100 Jack 102 33 Simpsons writer- 105 turned-TV host 108 34 Worthy of bussing 109 38 “... man ___ mouse?” 115 39 Org. that’s wellendowed? 116 41 ___ need-to-know basis 42 Mardi Gras day: 117 abbr. 43 “Pumping irony,” 118 part 2 49 Vermeer et al. 51 Pop singer Perry 120 53 With pictures: abbr. 121 54 It may come before 122 123 dawn 55 “Pumping irony,” 124 part 3 60 Nintendo rival 61 One Flew Over the 125 126 Cuckoo’s Nest creator 62 Bandleader 127 portrayer 1

b, d or k, e.g. Aleutian island Athos’s chronicler Knight in shining armor Where prints are processed? Sewing unions? Tropical fruit Towel word “Pumping irony,” part 4 “___ the Walrus” Lizard starter 1982 Fassbinder classic Location “Pumping irony,” part 5 He rules you out Bloodshot chihuahua Banca unit, once The Forest Service’s dept. Most stylish Bomb trial, briefly Pal of Gilda Beastly place “Pumping irony,” the end First name in jeans “Werewolves of London” singer Jon Krakauer’s Everest memoir, ___ Thin Air Ocean terror of WWII Horn of Africa gulf Ness was one Soft drink choice Bay of Naples resort Mailing courtesy: abbr. Derby flora Reason for a hard R 1950s failure

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