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/ # 4 /"% 2 s 6/,5 - % . O 14 Dedicated to Free Times founder Richard H. Siegel (1935-1993) and Scene founder Richard Kabat Group Publisher Chris Keating
CONTENTS
Publisher Andrew Zelman
5PFRONT
Associate Publisher Angela Lott Editor Vince Grzegorek Editorial Managing Editor Eric Sandy Music Editor Jeff Niesel Senior Writer Sam Allard Staff Writer Brett Zelman Web Editor Laura Morrison Dining Editor Douglas Trattner Stage Editor Christine Howey Visual Arts Writers Josh Usmani, Dott von Schneider Copy Editor Elaine Cicora Contributing Writers Billy Hallal, Marcus Gilmer, Philip de Oliveria Intern Lawrence Neil Advertising Senior Multimedia Account Executive John Crobar, Shayne Rose Multimedia Account Executive Kiara Davis Events and Marketing Coordinator Maggie Lilac Creative Services Production Manager Steve Miluch Layout Editor/Graphic Designer Christine Hahn Staff Photographer Emanuel Wallace
Ohio legislators continue to sleep on anti-intimidation bill, Frank Jackson beefs up campaign staff, and more
&EATURE
'ET /UT
We present a timely excerpt from Dan Egan’s The Death and Life of the Great Lakes
All the events you should check out this week
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Photo courtesy of Ohio House of Representatives
UPFRONT
State Rep. Stephanie Howse speaks at a news conference to push back against efforts to defund Planned Parenthood earlier this year
STALLED BILL WOULD TARGET INTIMIDATION OUTSIDE ABORTION CLINICS
THIS WEEK
HARASSMENT AND VIOLENCE against abortion clinics is on the rise, and some Democratic lawmakers are arguing that Ohio’s facilities are not adequately protected. It’s never an easy task to pass civil rights legislation in this state, but a proposed bill “would make it a crime to impede access to a reproductive health care facility and harass or intimidate its employees,” as ProgressOhio explains. House Bill 234 has languished in committee for months now. Calls to advance this bill increased in the wake of a particularly unsettling protest in
6
Columbus last month; members of the “Bible Believers” were seen outside the Founders Women’s Health Center, where they were telling women they “need to get raped.” It’s the same sort of garbage that occupied Public Square throughout the Republican National Convention, if you were mad enough to brave the masses that week. “You’re a low-budget whore, that’s all you are,” the jackal screams into his megaphone at one point in the video, shared widely via social media last month. Stuff like that would be prohibited under the HB 234
language, which takes aim at harassment and intimidation outside of abortion clinics in Ohio. The bill’s text specifically cites harassment against health care facility employees, but also bans “follow[ing] and harass[ing] another person within fifteen feet of the premises of a reproductive health care facility.” “Ohio needs to take a stand against the increasing violence and pass this bill,” said Rep. Stephanie Howse in a public statement. “We can protect the protesters’ freespeech rights, but we also have an obligation to address their violent
conduct and protect the rights of patients to access healthcare.” (Howse is a co-sponsor of the legislation, along with Rep. Michele Lepore-Hagan.) Throughout this summer, Preterm, in Cleveland, was targeted by vandals who tossed bricks through at least 10 windows at the Shaker Boulevard facility. “The protests are getting larger, louder and more aggressive,’’ said Chris France, executive director of Preterm. “There is no doubt that their conduct constitutes harassment and intimidation, not free speech.’’ — Eric Sandy
IT’S A RACKET
WILL WORK 4 PRESS
INSULT TO INJURY
Financing plan in place for massive rehab job at Euclid Avenue’s Cleveland Athletic Club. City leaders downright thrilled to get rogue squash players off the streets and back on safe courts.
Cleveland will gradually remove all pay phones from city streets. When asked how the work will get done, Mayor Jackson pointed out that he’ll need to find “something for Zack to do” next year, anyway.
Gov. John Kasich says he will no longer support Republican Party if its politicians can’t get back on track in Washington. Also cited Rob Portman “relentlessly” making fun of him for eating pizza with a fork.
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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Mayor Frank Jackson has signiďŹ cantly expanded his campaign staff, bringing on 30-year-old local attorney Michael Bowen to lead the day-to-day operations. Jackson’s prior campaign manager Wayne Clark, from Washington D.C., will reportedly stay on to “offer counsel as needed.â€? Bowen is young, but his mother, Lynn Ruffner, was a Shaker Heights councilwoman. He is an associate at the ďŹ rm of Taft, Stettinius & Hollister. He will take a leave of absence while he works for Jackson’s campaign. “We are very excited to join this great team and help ensure Mayor Jackson’s re-election,â€? Bowen said, in a press release. “Cleveland has momentum today, and that’s thanks in large part to Mayor Jackson’s leadership. There is so much at stake in this election, and we have to continue the progress achieved under Mayor Jackson. We are conďŹ dent that Clevelanders believe, like Mayor Jackson does, that our city’s future is bright if we protect and build on the progress Cleveland has made.â€? Additionally, Jackson announced that R Strategy Group will now lead campaign strategy and communications. The ďŹ rm’s vice president, Jon Benedict, will serve as chief strategist and work with president and CEO Jeff Rusnak on campaign communications, and with VP Kathy Berta on â€œďŹ eld outreach and volunteer activities.â€? Jackson is a 12-year incumbent. He was the top vote-getter in last month’s primary election, but with 38 percent of the (dismally low) voter turnout, hiring Bowen is expressive of the need for energy and charisma on the campaign trail. Jackson faces city councilman Zack Reed in the Nov. 7 general election. — Sam Allard
AFTER CEASE AND DESIST FROM JAMES FRANCO, LOCAL ATTORNEYS GET THEATRICAL Kevin Broccoli’s satirical comedy James Franco and Me was to be staged by the Peoples Improv Theater in New York in August. The two-man play written by Broccoli features the playwright and actor as himself in a waiting area outside his dying father’s hospital room.
He’s visited by James Franco — well, someone playing James Franco — and the two have conversations on death, life and art. It has been performed dozens of times in Rhode Island to positive reviews and was to enjoy its New York debut. Those scheduled performances, however, were put on hold in July when lawyers representing Franco sent a cease and desist letter to the theater over the use of Franco’s name in the title and marketing. “I was a little disappointed,â€? Broccoli told The New York Times. “I’m not someone who’s trying to get into legal entanglements by any means, but anyone who comes to see the show would see that it’s totally satire and within fair use guidelines.â€? Not only did Broccoli ďŹ rmly believe his play was well within legal bounds, he’d hoped the play would catch the attention of Franco himself at some point, maybe even garnering a tweet or comment of support.
DIGIT WIDGET $5,850,000 Federal grant RTA just secured to overhaul its communications systems, which would, when complete, update route info every 15 seconds, as opposed to the current three minutes.
6 Routes that Frontier Airlines is cutting from Hopkins: San Diego, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Houston, Atlanta and Charlotte are all on the chopping block.
15.6% Cleveland police department’s clearance rate for 2016 homicides. Of the 25 cities with the most murders, only Detroit (14.5%) ranks lower than Cleveland.
102 Indians’ total wins in 2017, only the third time in the franchise’s history (1954, 1995) that the ballclub has eclipsed the century mark.
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UPFRONT It’s unclear whether Franco has, in fact, read the play, but it did catch his representative’s attention, who, for some reason, used legal threats to shut it down. The issue drew the interest of the First Amendment and Arts Project at the Case Western University School of Law, which includes director Patrick Kabat, legal fellow Andrew Geronimo and CWRU law students. The group spoke with Broccoli, though they don’t represent him, and they’ve since inserted themselves into the proceedings. “The Constitution protects the right to receive information as a corollary to the right of free speech,” Kabat told Scene. (Broccoli’s legal team responded to the cease and desist letter last week as well.) The insertion from the First Amendment group comes in the form of a response letter, sent to Franco’s lawyers last night, befitting the matter at the heart of the argument (a play) and the fair use protection that applies to Broccoli’s art as it involves James Franco.
Yes, the answer letter contains a legal defense in the form of an original play. It features Franco’s lawyers, a chorus (naturally), and the Ghost of James Franco discussing James Franco and Me, with the many legal arguments taking center stage, buttressed by actual quotes on the meaning of art and creativity from Franco himself, drawn from published interviews the actor has conducted with various media outlets. One reviewer called it “a riotous and pointed defense of the First Amendment fit for the whole family.” (That reviewer was us.) The group also offered Franco’s lawyers the following settlement, in pursuit of an amicable resolution: They retract the cease and desist letter and Franco himself does one of the following: 1) Perform the role of Franco’s Ghost from their original play Sloane, Offer, Weber and Dern LLP and Us, which will enjoy its world premiere at the Spotted Owl, a cocktail bar in Cleveland, on Oct. 13 at 9 p.m.; 2) Tweet something such as, “Clever, very meta, see it,” in connection with the next public performance of James Franco and Me; or, 3) Read Broccoli’s script and provide feedback. The full reply can be read and
enjoyed in its entirety at clevescene. com. — Vince Grzegorek
CRESTWOOD HIGH SCHOOL SUSPENDS FOOTBALL PROGRAM AFTER UNSPECIFIED “INCIDENT” Last Friday afternoon, the superintendent for Crestwood Local Schools, David Toth, announced that he was suspending the high school football program until further notice. The announcement was effective immediately — meaning that Friday evening’s game against Mogadore was canceled — and came with no elaboration, other than that the Mantua Village police department was investigating an “incident.” Mantua police confirmed that they were looking into the incident in a public message later Friday. “The department at this time has opened a fact-finding investigation looking into allegations made to determine if criminal acts have occurred, and to what level, and to whom,” the department posted. “This investigation is ongoing and the School District has been cooperating completely.” As of Monday morning, no new details had emerged. Mr. Toth’s executive secretary said she knew nothing, and that details would be
posted as the school district received them. Toth told the Portage County’s Record-Courier that all members of the football program would be interviewed by the administration and that only Friday’s Mogadore game had been officially canceled. Rumors of hazing and bullying were circulating all weekend on social media. Some have said that a “group of seniors” beat up multiple freshmen. Channel 19 posted rumors about “players on the football team beating up a band member.” “If the nasty rumor floating around Portage County is true,” one Facebook post read, “[David Toth] has the opportunity to stand up against bullying and make a point to the children he is responsible for that they will never forget. Cancel the rest of the season and there’s a great chance that someone will speak out next time they know a teammate is doing something wrong.” Friday evening’s game was to have been Mogadore’s homecoming. Mogadore coach Matt Adorni said he does not yet know whether his undefeated team will be credited with the win. — Allard
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FEATURE
Photo by Ryan Hagerty/U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service
Silver carp jumping in the Fox River in Illinois.
PREVENTING AN INVASION Exotic fish are poised to infiltrate the Great Lakes. What’s at stake? And what can be done to stop them? By Dan Egan Reprinted from The Death and Life of the Great Lakes by Dan Egan. Copyright 2017 by Dan Egan. With permission of the publisher, W. W. Norton & Co., Inc. All rights reserved. ON A BRISK NOVEMBER DAY IN 1963, a station wagon pulled up to the brown brick federal research lab in eastern Arkansas loaded with a radical new weed killer. In the wake of the publication of Rachel Carson’s Silent Spring the previous fall, there was an increasing awareness of the potential perils of all the herbicides and pesticides flowing in our rivers, across our croplands and orchards, down our grocery aisles, onto our dinner tables, into our bloodstreams. Poisoning rivers to get rid of nuisance fish was particularly in vogue at the time, including the
Russian River in northern California and Utah’s Green River, and a clamor was growing for a smarter, gentler approach to combating unwanted creatures and vegetation. So researchers at the U.S. Department of Interior’s Fish Farming Experimental Laboratory, located in the heart of Arkansas catfish farming country, were taking delivery of what they hoped would be a new generation of nontoxic aquatic weed-control agents. The station wagon’s tailgate was dropped and three cardboard boxes, each with two white arrows pointing up, were hauled through the lab doors. The label on the boxes from Malaysia told the handlers that this was not just another toxic chemical compound whipped up in a lab. It read: “Live Fish.” The boxes contained dozens of juvenile grass carp, a
species native to Asia and famous for taking to forests of seaweed like locusts to crops. The idea at the research lab was to deploy these fish instead of chemicals across the South to clean fish farm ponds as well as weed-choked rivers and irrigation ditches. “When they did this, this was right. This was the thing to do,” said Andrew Mitchell, a recently retired biologist from the federal research lab. “It was one fish to do one job — keep chemicals out of the environment.” That station wagon’s payload was the first documented shipment to the United States of a group of fish collectively known as Asian carp. Within a decade of the grass carp’s arrival, an Arkansas fish farmer seeking his own batch of the
exotic weed-eating fish accidentally imported the three other Asian carp species: black, bighead and silver carp. He didn’t know what to do with these other types of Asian carp because they weren’t weed-eating machines. Silver and bighead carp are filter feeders that strip plankton and other floating nutrients from the waters in which they swim. Black carp live off mollusks. The fish farmer did what he thought was the right thing. He turned his exotic fish over to the government. State fishery workers could have destroyed these Adams and Eves. Instead they decided to try to get the novel brood to reproduce — just for kicks, apparently. “We had this little agreement that if we learned how to spawn them, that he got some of the stock back,” | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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FEATURE former Arkansas Game and Fish Director Scott Henderson told me. “It was all cordial. We were interested in doing some research to see what they were, and I guess at the time, getting them out of the public.” The fish farmer gave Henderson’s department 22 adult silver carp, 20 adult black carp, and 18 adult bighead carp and, like cavemen trying to spark a fire, the state hatchery workers tried feverishly to get their brood of exotic fish to breed. They had little luck because, it turns out, raising Asian carp in hatcheries is an absurdly intricate procedure that requires precise timing and water conditions, as well as injections of crushed fish pituitary glands and human hormones harvested from the urine of pregnant women. The hatchery workers killed all the black carp before they could reproduce a single fish, but they had better luck with the bighead and silver carp when they turned to S.Y. Lin, a professor at National Taiwan University who had moved to Washington, D.C., as an employee of the United Nations Food and Agriculture Organization. In his three weeks in Arkansas back in the early 1970s, Lin took two 12-pound silver carp and produced nearly 1 million eyelash-sized silver carp fry. The one 15-pound bighead carp Lin worked with produced 20,000 little bigheads. And the Arkansas fish biologists had their fire. Not long after they had cracked the breeding problem, the Arkansas Game and Fish Commission agreed to send some of their fish to other aquaculture research facilities, including Auburn University. They also entered into a contract with the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency to employ the curious carp in sewage treatment experiments. Former Arkansas Game and Fish chairman-turned-fish-farmer Mike Freeze explained to me the rationale behind the bizarre experiments while bouncing around in his pickup along the levees containing his crops of catfish. Arkansas waterways in the 1970s, Freeze explained, were like waterways everywhere else in the country — ridiculously filthy, in part because small communities didn’t have adequate sewage treatment systems. So Arkansas turned to the filter-feeding carp in an elegant, if a bit repugnant, plan to clean up its waters. Phase One was to plant
14
bigheads and silvers in experimental sewage lagoons and let them convert the decaying human waste into fish flesh. Phase Two would be to sell those fish as food to fund small cities’ sewage treatment costs. The fish, particularly bighead carp, are favored in Asia for their flaky, mild flesh. “I remember we sent sample after sample [of fish] from the sewage ponds to Baylor University to make sure they didn’t have any viruses or things like that,” said Freeze, who was an hourly worker at the state hatchery during the time of the carp experiments. It didn’t take long for word of Arkansas’ fecesto-flesh business plan to spread, and the federal Food and Drug
gobble up their competition. They starve it out by stripping away the plankton upon which every other fish species directly or indirectly depends. Bighead carp can grow larger than 100 pounds and each day consume up to 20 pounds of plankton. Bighead and silver carp have so squeezed aside native species that the Asian carp biomass in some stretches of rivers in the Mississippi basin is thought to be more than 90 percent — the same dire situation that an alewife-plagued Lake Michigan suffered in the 1960s. It’s not just native fish species that suffer where these fish succeed. Silver carp, which are slightly smaller than bighead carp, have become YouTube Photo by Judd McCullum
The “Redneck Fishing Tournament” on the Illinois River
Administration soon stepped in. “They had a standing policy,” said Freeze, “that it was not legal to take these fish out of sewage ponds and sell them for human consumption.” The experiments stopped when federal funding dried up. Some fish were destroyed. Others were simply set free. Freeze remembers containment screens swinging open and gates being lifted to drain hatchery ponds — and their inhabitants — into Arkansas ditches and streams. It all seemed innocuous at the time — the fish were so difficult to breed under even precise hatchery conditions that nobody thought there was any chance that the carp would be able to breed on their own in the wild. This was a blunder of the highest order. Soon baby bighead and silver carp started turning up in rivers and streams across the South, and the swarming fish have been migrating north ever since. The problem is bighead and silver carp don’t just invade ecosystems. They conquer them. They don’t
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
sensations because of their penchant for rocketing out of the water like piscine missiles when agitated by the whir of a boat motor. One such video starts with a Star Wars-style opening. Text scrolls in front of a globe spinning in space, and an arcing red line shows the invasive fish’s journey from Asia, across the Pacific Ocean to the Illinois River town of Peoria. What follows is some four minutes of young men water skiing while wielding swords and wearing football helmets bristling with giant nails. Fish-impaling spikes poke similarly from shin guards. One water skier protects his torso by wearing a bumin-a-barrel-style metal garbage can. The water skiers swat, smack, and hack at the hundreds of fish bursting from the water like popcorn. All joking and ridiculously dangerous stunting aside, water skiing and jet boating have become impossible in some places, particularly on the Illinois River where things are so bad that the town of Bath hosts an annual “Redneck Fishing Tournament.” It is the one
time of year in this southern Illinois hamlet you will find the river packed with motorboats. They are piloted by beer-swigging, helmet-wearing anglers who try to catch as many silver carp as possible in three hours — not with hooks and lines, but by waving fishing nets in the air. The year I attended the tournament I saw several people leave the water after being battered and bloodied by the jumping fish that hit hard as a fist. I saw one man, not smart enough to wear a helmet, spit out a tooth. The tourney’s 78 registered boats that day landed 1,840 fish, all of which were buried with a backhoe on the riverbank. The bar owner who hosted the tournament assured me the mass grave didn’t even dent the population swarming in the river, but insisted that was not the point of the event. She hosts it to provide locals a bit of zany, late summer fun and, more importantly, she said it serves as a warning to people across the country of what could be coming to their own lakes and rivers. She had a particular set of lakes in mind. “If these things get into the Great Lakes,” she told me, “you are in trouble.” The word “trouble” doesn’t really capture what is at stake, both environmentally and economically, if the oversized fish succeed in what has so far seemed like their inevitable push to colonize the Great Lakes, the biggest home they could ever hope to find, and one that still sustains a multibillion-dollar commercial and recreational fishery. While silver carp make the headlines for their leaping ability, bighead carp lurk largely out of the public’s consciousness. Not so for commercial fisherman Orion Briney, who more than a decade ago figured out how to eke out a living by catching bigheads on the Illinois River and selling them to a wholesaler who guts, ices, and ships them by the refrigerated containerfull back to China. Briney can catch 15,000 pounds of bigheads in his nets. Not in one day. In 25 minutes. Here is a little perspective on that number: Wisconsin’s quota for commercial perch fishing on all the state waters of Lake Michigan in some past years has been about 20,000 pounds. That’s not a per-day limit. That’s the limit for an entire year. I went out one steamy summer day with Briney and was left gobsmacked (and silver carp-smacked) by what had become of the river since the invaders had swarmed in just a few years earlier. Briney fishes cowboy-
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Photo by Ryan Hagerty/U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service
FEATURE
A biologist weighs a bighead carp.
style, using his boat to herd his quarry. “See that big wave?” he asked me as we roared downstream at dawn. I could see only a patch of choppy black water. “I’ll bet there is 400,000 to 500,000 pounds in there!” He arced his boat toward the fish and then swooped down behind them, chasing the thrashing mass into his nets. Briney had no interest in the silver carp flying about the boat — and his head, which he deftly shielded with his Popeye-sized forearms. He was angling only for bigheads, a tastier and less bony fish that has a small market in the United States and, because bigheads are typically sold live in Asia, has only limited appeal abroad. It took him less than a half hour to round up more than 13,000 pounds of fish — and another 3½ hours to pluck out the bigheads, one by one, from 800 yards of net. The biggest weighed nearly 40 pounds, monsters that lurked so low in the murky water they’re rarely seen by the pontoon harbors, and the rivers that feed them — which also happen to be the places where most people boat, jet ski, and fish. Inland waters
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connected to the lakes are similarly threatened. The financial impact of an infestation of these areas alone could be staggering. The eight Great Lakes states alone are home to some 4 million recreational boats, about a third of the United States’ total. Arkansas’ Freeze knows these numbers and he has lamented from afar the bighead and silver carp’s inexorable march north. He told me he believes that after his crew let their fish go free there were subsequent escapes of bighead and silver carp from research facilities and fish farms (captive-raised bighead carp eventually became a common cash crop for fish farmers, though it is now illegal to transport them live across state lines.) He also provided me documentation showing that the federal government later helped fish farmers reimport black carp to control pesky snails in aquaculture ponds. Not surprisingly, black carp are now also swimming free in rivers down South. But he acknowledges that the bighead and silver carp that got loose on his watch almost surely were among the first to get into the
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wild. He’s not proud about his role in what is shaping up as a billion-dollar blunder. But he doesn’t hide from it, either. “I’m old enough and big enough,” he said, “to say that there are a lot of things in my life that I’d go back and change.” Ships sailing up the St. Lawrence Seaway have dumped dozens of exotic critters into the Great Lakes since it opened more than a half century ago. The Chicago canal system turned this regional problem into an evergrowing national one as invasive species ride its waters out of the Great Lakes and into the basin that connects the waters of 31 states. Scientists have identified 39 invasive species poised to ride the Chicago canal into or out of the Great Lakes, including a fish-killing virus in Lake Michigan today that could ravage the South’s catfish farming industry as well as five species of nuisance fish, including the sea lamprey. Threatening from the other direction, beyond the Asian carp, is the razor-toothed snakehead, which can breathe air and slither short distances over land and is now swimming loose in the Mississippi basin. This problem was recognized nearly two decades ago, when Congress, alerted to the idea that Great Lakes invaders were primed to make their way out of the lakes and into the Mississippi basin, authorized construction of an experimental electrical barrier on the canal, about 35 miles downstream from Chicago’s Lake Michigan shoreline. Underwater electric barriers to block migrating fish had been successful on streams and irrigation canals in the West, but never on a waterway as big as Chicago’s, and never on one that is a major navigation corridor plied by thousands of barges annually. After six years of designing, building, and debugging, the Army Corps finally turned on the $1.5 million contraption in 2002. But by then the species of Great Lakes invasive fish that scientists had feared would use the canal to escape into the Mississippi basin had already done so. So the barrier was repurposed as a device to halt the migration of Asian carp into the lakes from the other direction. The barrier was always intended to be just a Band-Aid until a more permanent solution could be devised. But soon after it was activated, Congress became convinced it was worth funding a giant version, one built to last decades and operate at four times the strength of the original. Construction started in
2004 and was finished in 2006. But then the government refused to turn it on, largely because of the U.S. Coast Guard’s fear that its electrical current would cause sparks to fly between canal barges, some of which carry petroleum and other flammable materials. The Coast Guard’s primary mission, after all, is to protect the barge workers and recreational boaters floating up and down the canal. It’s not to worry about what type of fish are swimming in the Great Lakes, even if it’s a type of fish that some fret could utterly upend the world’s largest freshwater system. As the former chairman of the commission that helps guide U.S. and Canadian management of the Great Lakes has put it: If the fight to stop the giant fish from colonizing the lakes fails, well, “it is just a matter of time before we end up with a carp pond.” Barrier safety tests dragged on into early 2008 when Army Corps Gen. John Peabody arrived to take charge of the carp fight. Peabody is a 1980 graduate of West Point who has done tours in the Pacific, Panama, Somalia, and the Middle East, where he led 3,000 engineers into Iraq during the 2003 attack on Baghdad. In his three-plus decades in uniform, Peabody has picked up a graduate degree in public administration from Harvard, studied as an Olmsted Scholar in Mexico City, and earned his master parachutist badge. He has received a Bronze Star for valor as well as a Purple Heart. The general limps on a metal hip. He has a penchant for quoting war movie dialogue and commands most any room he walks into with a nononsense demeanor that borders on brusque. But he was also once a little boy who relished hot summer days at Lake Erie’s Nickel Plate Park beach in Huron, Ohio. “The night before, we’d get picnic baskets, beach balls, all the rest, in our station wagon — this was the ’60s ... and my brothers and I would get all excited: ‘Daddy, Daddy! Mommy’s taking us to the lake!’” the general told me, as he knocked back a late afternoon coffee at the massive conference table in his office in downtown Vicksburg, Mississippi. “And my cynical dad would say: ‘Your mother is taking you to the biggest cesspool in northern Ohio.’” Despite the stench of all the rotting alewife carcasses littering the polluted beach when he was a child — one of which Peabody vividly recalls gouging his foot — the Great Lakes stole a soft spot in the heart of the hard-nosed general that motivated
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FEATURE him when he took over the carp fight. “There was an opportunity for us to prevent a really bad thing from happening — a calamity, a crisis, whatever word you want to put to that.” In the months after he took over the job, Peabody turned on the new electric barrier that the Coast Guard had kept mothballed. As a safety compromise with his sister agency, Peabody ordered the new barrier, which was designed to run as high as four volts per inch, to run only at the same voltage as the nearby demonstration barrier: one volt per inch. One volt does not provide a strong enough jolt to stop juvenile fish, which, because of their size, are more immune to electrical pulses. But one volt was a level the barge industry could live with and, at the time, no Asian carp had been detected near the barrier. “If the fish weren’t close enough to be a threat, it didn’t seem prudent at that time to raise the operating parameters,” Peabody told me. That was a big if, and the general knew it. Biologists tracking the pace of the Asian carp’s migration up the Mississippi and Illinois Rivers believed that by 2008 the fish should have long ago been probing the barrier, even though crews using nets and electroshocking devices continued to turn up zero evidence of fish in the area. Everyone involved knew that finding the first few fish at the leading edge of the invasion would be exceedingly difficult because the fish have an uncanny ability to avoid nets. Shocking the water to stun the fish so they float to the surface doesn’t work either, because Asian carp can often lurk too deep to be stunned. Even though the nets used to hunt the carp near the barrier came up empty, Peabody still smelled trouble in the canal. “Our lack of information was so great,” he told me. “I felt we had to take whatever we could and apply it as quickly as possible to try and get more information.” The University of Notre Dame’s David Lodge had what he was looking for. Lodge’s skills as an ecologist and his willingness to wade into sticky issues had made him and his colleagues a logical choice a few years earlier when a think tank funded by the Great Lakes states gave his lab a grant to develop a geneticbased test to identify invasive species hitchhiking into the lakes in the
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ballast water of Seaway freighters. Law enforcement investigators have been using DNA analysis for more than two decades to put criminals behind bars. These genetic fingerprints can be harvested from almost anything the human body sheds — flecks of skin, strings of saliva, drops of semen, strands of hair. From that material, scientists can isolate and identify the molecules that are an individual’s DNA, the famous double helix. Each minuscule twisting ladder is made up of billions of rungs built from four types of chemicals, called nucleotides. DNA is such a powerful forensic tool because the order of these billions of rungs, each made up of two interlocking nucleotides, is unique for each individual. Scientists zero in on relatively short sequences of nucleotides on a piece of human DNA to see if the genetic material harvested from a crime scene is a match for DNA taken from a suspect. But this genetic fingerprinting process also works on the species level; all silver carp, for example, share an identical sequence of nucleotides at various places in their DNA. It wasn’t a big leap for the Notre Dame team to realize that DNA testing could be used to find evidence of carp in the canal. This kind of analysis had already been done on a smaller scale by an Italian researcher who used traces of DNA to find American bullfrogs in European ponds. It works because fish and other aquatic life constantly shed cells in mucus, urine, and feces. Those cells tend to stay suspended in water, and that means every fish leaves in its wake a genetic trail. That trail can be traced by filtering all the DNA from all the different species that have left behind a piece of themselves in a water sample. Once that pile of DNA is isolated, lab technicians put it in a test tube and add to it some precisely engineered genetic markers — called primers — that are designed to attach only to the DNA of the targeted species. A concoction with free-floating nucleotides is also added to the mix and then the sample is heated. The heat unravels the DNA helixes of all the species filtered from the original water sample. If any of the targeted species’ DNA is present, the primers glom on to each separated helix as the sample cools. That starts a zipper-like reaction in which an enzyme that is added to the sample binds the free-floating nucleotides to each strand of original DNA. Suddenly one piece of DNA has been turned into two. The process is repeated over and over so that even a
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single piece of DNA can be replicated beyond a billion, to the point the target DNA can actually be seen as a glow under an ultraviolet light when yet another chemical is added. One piece of DNA wouldn’t be enough to identify a species in a sample, nor would 100,000. But once you get a billion or beyond, a visible glow emerges. Now a previously invisible fish is revealed. It all worked beautifully in the Notre Dame lab, but Lodge’s team knew there was a big difference between isolating DNA floating in aquariums and sifting it from a freeflowing river. By early 2009, Lodge’s staff was ready to try. At a January meeting in downtown Chicago among researchers guiding operation of the Army Corps’ electric fish barrier, one of Lodge’s assistants pulled an Army Corps biologist into a quiet corner. He told her he believed they had cracked the problem of filtering and identifying Asian carp DNA from open water and he thought it could be applied on the Chicago canal. The biologist took the idea to her bosses at the Army Corps’ regional office in Chicago and got the go-ahead. At that time, Peabody had no idea what his staff or the Notre Dame scientists were up to. Andy Mahon, an ecologist and geneticist who worked in Lodge’s lab back then, remembers the miserable morning a few months later when he and a colleague gave their new fish-hunting tool a whirl on the muddy, spring-swollen Illinois River. They figured if DNA didn’t turn up in a place like this, known to be thick with Asian carp, there was no sense trying to detect it where there might be only a handful of the fish. The two spent the morning freezing their hands filling two-liter plastic bottles, the excitement they had felt just weeks earlier in the lab tumbling away as they worked. How could they possibly find mere molecules of fish in all this murky water? Mahon headed back to South Bend with his spirit as chilled as the bones in his fingers. He was alone in his lab testing the samples a few days later when the telltale glow emerged. He dashed down the hallway looking for Lodge and the others. “Shocked,” is how he described their collective reaction. The team decided to move the testing slowly up the river, toward areas where carp numbers were known to be lower. “We had developed the tool and tested it the best way we could — in the lab, and in the field in a preliminary way,” Lodge said.
“But to build our own confidence and build the confidence of anybody else, we wanted to start in places where everybody agreed there were fish. So the general strategy was to start south and work our way north [toward the barrier], because the whole idea was to identify where the leading edge of the invasion front was.” When Peabody finally got word of what the Notre Dame scientists were up to, he requested a face-to-face meeting. In the summer of 2009, the general and his staff showed up at Rosie’s Family Restaurant just down the road from the electric fish barrier in an industrial corner of suburban southwest Chicago. Peabody and his staff, as usual, arrived in combat dress — camouflaged pants tucked into high-laced boots — to grill one of Lodge’s colleagues on what the Notre Dame team was trying to do. Peabody planted himself at the head of a table with the Notre Dame scientist at his side (Lodge was not there that day; he had a class to teach). The general’s staff scattered around, some standing, some sitting at the table. A map was unfolded. Sugar packets were used to represent fish, barriers, and boats. It was at times an awkward summit between military men who were demanding clear, yes-or-no answers and a scientist who makes his living in the fuzzy place at the edge of human knowledge. Lodge’s crew knew it was wading into murky waters. For one thing, the specific technique it developed to hunt for Asian carp in rivers hadn’t at that point been published in a scientific journal, which meant it had not been independently validated by other scientists. What’s more, this type of DNA analysis can indicate nothing about numbers of fish, their precise location (DNA drifts on the current), exactly how long that genetic material has been in the river or even how it might have gotten there. But Peabody was determined to find out if the fish were pressing up against the new barrier. If the general could demonstrate that the giant carp (or even their tiny offspring) had indeed arrived at the barrier, that could justify cranking up its voltage. Peabody heard enough that day to be convinced DNA was the best tool he had to find the fish. He allowed Lodge’s team to press on. The Notre Dame team continued northward in its testing — and continued to turn up evidence of the fish. In September 2009, it reported Asian carp DNA about 10 miles farther upriver than the fish had ever been seen. If the DNA evidence
was correct, Asian carp had passed through the last navigation lock before the electric barrier. A lock is a relatively tricky obstacle for a group of fish trying to colonize new waters because a fish has to accompany a boat into the lock chamber and exit with it once the boat is lifted and the lock gates are opened. Think of a cockroach using an elevator to migrate between floors of an office building. It probably will happen eventually, but it involves a certain amount of luck. Then, to establish a breeding population, others have to make the same trip. Then they have to find each other. The general might not have been pleased with fresh intelligence that at least one fish had apparently breached the last lock before the electric barrier. But at least this new DNA tool seemed to work precisely the way he had hoped. Like a pair of night-vision goggles, it illuminated a previously invisible enemy, and that gave the general a chance to fight back. Peabody doubled the barrier voltage. The Notre Dame team pressed on with its sampling. Lodge didn’t plan to stop until he got to an area of the river where all sampling showed no trace of DNA. “The whole point,” he said, “is to go to where we got all zeros, and of course, everybody, including us, was hoping all zeros happened below the barrier.” Everything changed on Nov. 18, 2009, at 7:48 a.m. That’s when Lodge sent an email notifying Army Corps officials that water samples beyond the barrier had tested positive for Asian carp. This was not a memo Lodge wanted to write. When it was time to hit the send button, he said, “It made me feel a little sick.” Lodge reckoned a positive sample above the barrier meant at least some Asian carp had somehow gotten through. Like everything else, DNA can’t drift upstream. Environmental groups and politicians from neighboring Great Lakes states pounced at the news that the Great Lakes’ last line of defense against an Asian carp invasion had apparently failed. They demanded that the Army Corps stop operating two navigation locks near downtown Chicago. The idea was to use the locks as makeshift dams to block the carp’s final advance into Lake Michigan. The problem is that closing the gates would not just stop fish, it would also stop the free flow of cargo on the canal, a move that Illinois barge operators said would have disastrous consequences not only for their businesses but for the industries they serve, as well as the
fleet of recreational and tour boats in downtown Chicago. But just as it is dubious that closing the St. Lawrence Seaway to overseas traffic would have devastating international economic consequences, the financial impact of shutting the locks (which would affect less than 1 percent of the total cargo moved through the Chicago region daily) was probably overblown by the barge industry. Even so, Peabody, who is in the business of moving barges, wasn’t about to recommend lock closure, which he argued wouldn’t necessarily work because the structures are aged and leaky and the fish might pass through in any event. The locks would also have to be opened if big rains hit because when the water level gets exceptionally high in the Chicago canal, the whole system reverses and the Chicago River temporarily flows backward into Lake Michigan. Not opening the locks to allow this to happen could inundate downtown Chicago. In any case, Peabody clearly felt he was already doing enough. He’d cranked up the voltage at the barrier and, just days before he learned that Asian carp DNA had been found beyond it, his agency backed a most radical plan to literally stop dead any migrating fish.
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On the gray morning of Dec. 3, 2009, the Chicago Sanitary and Ship Canal looked like a crime scene. Yellow police tape laced the banks. Roads to the water’s edge were blocked by police officers shivering in the cold, unable to explain to passersby precisely what had happened. Behind the barricades, a generator thrummed outside a huge government tent with computer workstations and coffee for the 400 federal, state, and Canadian fishery workers who had descended on this industrial corner of Chicago from as far away as Quebec. Just outside the tent, the bosses of the operation corralled the cluster of news reporters at the water’s edge to tell their story. They were the ones who had killed the canal, they explained. They had poisoned it because they were at war — with Asian carp. The first hint that the river was dying came when the fish started to float to the surface, their white bellies aglow in the lifting dawn light. One by one they popped into view, the way stars emerge at dusk. Some could only flap their gills as they drifted on the tea-colored current. Others thrashed. All of them — ultimately a constellation of thousands — would be carcasses by the time the winter sun slipped below the horizon. | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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Photo by Lt. David French./U.S. Coast Guard
FEATURE
Fish-sorting and disposal operations after rotenone poisoning in May, 2010.
“I can sum up my comments in six words: It’s time to man the barricades,” said the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service’s John Rogner. “For nearly 10 years we’ve watched as two species of introduced Asian carp — the bighead carp and silver carp — have moved up the Mississippi and Illinois Rivers, and now they are here. They are now at the gates to the Great Lakes and our action over the next several days is designed to protect those gates.” The kill had been ordered because the new barrier needed to be briefly shut down for maintenance. No actual Asian carp had been found within 15 miles of the barrier — about 50 miles from Lake Michigan — but DNA tests were telling biologists that fish were in the canal much closer to the barrier. Even though the original, smaller electric barrier would continue to run during the new barrier’s shutdown, Peabody and everybody else in the carp fight wanted the canal sterilized, just in case. “I’m likening this action to chemotherapy,” President Barack
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Obama’s handpicked “Great Lakes Czar” Cameron Davis lamented in the days leading up to the morning the government killed the canal. “Nobody wants to go through chemo, but you do it to protect the good cells from being overridden by the bad cells. That’s what this is.” By midmorning on the day of the poisoning, Rogner was assuring reporters the fish kill was going precisely as planned. But there was a problem. Among all the dead bass, bullhead, gizzard shad, suckers, common carp, and catfish bobbing to the surface, no one had found a single Asian carp. Lodge’s DNA samples might have told Peabody that the carp were indeed swimming in the poisoned stretch of canal, but the fish floating to the surface told a different story. Night fell. In all the barrels of toxic carcasses headed for a landfill — ultimately the poisoning of the canal would yield about 54,000 pounds of flesh — there was not even one Asian carp. Finally, at 7 p.m., Rogner again summoned reporters to the canal’s
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edge. They had found what they were looking for — a single, 22inch bighead carp. Although it was unsettling news for the Great Lakes that the Asian carp — or an Asian carp — had indeed arrived in the waters just below the barrier, a wave of relief washed over Lodge as word reached the Notre Dame team. The sight of that one fish, he thought, at least validated DNA as a fish-hunting tool. Not everyone was so convinced. Less than two weeks after the poisoning, a team of federal scientists arrived in South Bend to inspect Lodge’s lab. They scrutinized how water samples were stored, how they were filtered, and what steps were taken to ensure Asian carp DNA hadn’t somehow contaminated any of the equipment, which could result in false positive results. The Notre Dame team felt a bit like its spouse had hired a private investigator to catch it cheating. The investigators found no such evidence. In fact, they came away impressed, writing in their official report that Lodge’s process is “sufficiently reliable and robust in reporting a pattern of detection that
should be considered actionable in a management context.” The Notre Dame team took that to mean that if you’ve got DNA, you’ve got strong evidence that the fish are there, and you could justify taking action to somehow plug the canal and block others from making the same trip. Still, Peabody wasn’t ready to believe that a positive DNA sample in the canal on the lake side of the barrier meant the fish were swimming free into Lake Michigan. The general worried the DNA might have gotten there some other way. Perhaps a barge coming up from the Asian carp-infested waters of the Mississippi basin had somehow picked up Asian carp slime or excrement on its hull. Or maybe the DNA came from the droppings of a migrating bird that had eaten an Asian carp on its way toward Lake Michigan. Or, perhaps, an Asian carp flopped onto the deck of a barge below the barrier, and then flopped off it once the barge passed through. Peabody knew he was taking a chance adopting a novel, untested technology in a high-stakes fight, but
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FEATURE he felt compelled to find out where the fish were so he could make the smartest decision possible about how high to operate the barrier voltage. That was all he wanted from Lodge’s DNA sampling. He never expected DNA to surface beyond the barrier, but he was taken aback by the fuss it caused when it did. “We got a few hits above the barrier,” he told me, “and some people were flat-panicked by that.” But it wasn’t just “some people.” It was the attorneys general from five Great Lakes states who went to federal court in early 2010 to force the Army Corps and the State of Illinois to shut the navigation locks as a last-ditch effort to halt the advance. In just a matter of weeks, the decade-old saga of a giant, leaping type of carp slowly migrating north toward the Great Lakes had gone from a regional news story framed as a quirky situation on a curious river to national news about how two species of carp were tearing apart a region. “Everybody got into this expecting we wouldn’t have any positive samples above the barrier,” said
Lindsay Chadderton, an invasive species expert from the Nature Conservancy who helped the Lodge team develop and deploy the DNA testing. “The reality is if we had only found positives below the electric barrier ... none of this controversy would have happened. The minute we started finding positives above the barrier, that is when the blame game started. That is when the litigation started with the lock closure, and that is when things started to get testy.” The controversy over how much weight should be put on mere molecules floating in water became A-section news in media outlets as far away and as big as The New York Times, which reported that the fight to beat back the fish had so consumed then-President Barack Obama’s chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel, that when he returned to Chicago in 2010 to run for mayor, Emanuel’s own staff sent him off with a dead Asian carp. Most biologists acknowledge that a small number of fish advancing beyond the barrier does not mean a self-sustaining Asian carp population in the Great Lakes has arrived, or that one is inevitable. For an invasion to be successful, first the fish have to be sexually mature, then they have
to find appropriate spawning areas, then they have to find each other, and then their offspring have to figure out how to survive to adulthood in a new environment and find their own mates. Then the next generation has to have similar success. And so on. For Peabody, this meant it wasn’t time to retreat and move the fight to the locks near Lake Michigan shoreline; it was time to stand his ground at the electric barrier. Meanwhile, Lodge’s team continued testing the waters beyond the barrier throughout the spring of 2010, and kept getting more positive DNA hits. Yet fishing expeditions with nets and electroshockers in the same areas continued to turn up zero Asian carp. Desperate to find an actual fish above the barrier and not just its genetic fingerprints, in late May 2010, six months after the first poisoning, the federal government and state of Illinois conducted a second river poisoning just six miles from the Lake Michigan shoreline in an area of water above the barrier that had repeatedly tested positive for Asian carp DNA. This poisoning claimed another 100,000 pounds of fish representing some 40 species. Not one Asian carp was found. Peabody and the rest of the federal team in the carp
fight walked away after the second poisoning more confident that the barrier was holding back the fish, and less confident that Lodge’s DNA samples meant fish were in the area. Peabody and his colleagues with the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service wanted an actual fish — and not just a lab report — before they would be convinced an actual invasion above the barrier was under way. This is harder than you might expect. Duane Chapman, a United States Geological Survey biologist, once marshaled four boats to chase three radio-tagged Asian carp for two days on a Missouri River tributary using electroshocking gear and commercial fishing nets. The radio tags emitted a signal that told the crew the precise location of the fish, which had been trapped between a set of two nets stretching the entire width and depth of the river. But the water was too deep for the electroshockers to force the fish to surface, and the carp proved cagey enough to avoid getting snarled in the nets. “They know what nets are,” Chapman said, “and they avoid them.” Finally, on June 23, 2010, a month after the second river poisoning and about a year after the Army Corps first hired Notre Dame to help it find the leading edge of the
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invasion, the Illinois Department of Natural Resources announced that a 20-pound adult bighead carp had indeed been caught in a ďŹ shing net beyond the barrier — just six miles from the Lake Michigan shoreline. “We set out on a fact-ďŹ nding mission and we have found what we were looking for,â€? Rogner of the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service proclaimed in a news release. Lodge again felt a grim sort of vindication and Illinois’ neighboring states clamored louder for lock closure, arguing that the ďŹ sh was, ďŹ nally, irrefutable evidence the electric barrier was leaking Asian carp. Then a few weeks later Rogner issued another news release that claimed the ďŹ sh might have been lifted around the barrier by human hands after a lab analysis showed that apparently it had spent at least some of its life in waters below the barrier. He based this theory on a lab analysis of the carp’s ear bones, which can sometimes tell researchers where a ďŹ sh once lived, because different water bodies leave different chemical signatures on the bone. But not in this case — an independent reviewer of the lab analysis warned that no deďŹ nitive conclusion could be reached about this particular bighead carp’s life history. Even so, the news release claimed that the bone analysis “does suggest to us that the ďŹ sh ... may have been put there by humans, perhaps as a ritual cultural release or through bait bucket transfer.â€? The problem, beyond the peer reviewer’s caution not to use this ďŹ sh’s ear bones to infer anything about its life history, is that an ear bone doesn’t contain any information about how a ďŹ sh moves from one waterbody to another; it can’t reveal if a ďŹ sh traveled in a tank in the back of a pickup truck or if it made the migration on its own. As for the story about a human planting it, bighead carp were at one time sold live in ďŹ sh markets around Chicago, and rumors of “cultural releasesâ€? of Asian carp by people of Asian ancestry practicing some sort of ritual have swirled around Chicago for years. But when I pressed an Illinois Department of Natural Resources spokesman for any evidence of this actually happening with bighead or silver carp in Chicago, the best he could muster was a link to a Wikipedia article. It stated that animal releases were a common practice during the Ming Dynasty in China. He didn’t offer to send me the Wikipedia article that mentioned the Ming Dynasty ended in 1644.
Peabody and Lodge eventually stopped communicating and the two ended up in a downtown Chicago federal courtroom in early September 2010. They were both called as witnesses in the federal lawsuit brought by the neighboring states. In addition to lock closures, the states sued to force the Army Corps to expedite a congressionally ordered study of what it will take to permanently reconstruct the natural barrier between the Great Lakes and the Mississippi basin that the Chicago canal destroyed. When Peabody took the stand, he looked mildly agitated. “Never in my worst nightmares or wildest imagination did I think that a ďŹ sh would so dominate my time and attention, because you don’t think of the Corps of Engineers doing that,â€? he told me later. “You think of us as managing water resource infrastructure and building things and ďŹ ghting oods and doing that kind of stuff.â€? During his day in court, Peabody talked about his doubts that positive DNA samples meant the presence of live ďŹ sh, and he had a ďŹ sh expert ally in the courtroom in Charlie Wooley, the deputy regional director of the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. Wooley testiďŹ ed that the federal government and state of Illinois had gone to extraordinary lengths to try to follow up on the positive DNA samples with evidence of actual ďŹ sh. They hunted for the ďŹ sh with nets, electroshockers and barrels of poison. And all they had to show for it was that single bighead carp above the barrier, and a single bighead carp in the waters just below the barrier — the ďŹ sh killed in the December 2009 poisoning. “The traditional methods allow us to go out and sample large areas very effectively, very efďŹ ciently in a relatively short period of time,â€? Wooley testiďŹ ed. “They are tried and true.â€? Lodge countered on the witness stand that those traditional ďŹ sh sampling tools are effective at capturing only 1 percent of a ďŹ sh population on a river the size of the Chicago canal. That means if small numbers of Asian carp lurked among tens of thousands of ďŹ sh, odds are they would never turn up in a net or oat to the surface if shocked. Asian carp, unlike many other ďŹ sh species, also have a tendency to sink when poisoned. All this, Lodge has long argued, is precisely what makes DNA surveillance so powerful. But it’s only as powerful as the trust you put in it. “Continuing to try to use the traditional tools to detect the presence of rare or of very sparse populations is like saying: ‘You know, even
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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Photo courtesy of Asian Carp Regional Coordinating Committee
FEATURE
Silver carp jumping in the Fox River.
though we’ve got an MRI machine, I’m going to try and detect your cancer with a physical exam; I don’t really understand what this MRI machine is doing, so I’m not going to believe it. I’m going to poke you with my fingers and figure out whether you’ve got cancer or not,’” he said in later interview. Lodge was shaking as he ate from a bag of M&Ms after his testimony. He looked as if he had been the one on trial. The judge sided with the Army Corps and refused to issue an emergency order to shut the locks. In early 2014, the Army Corps finally released a 10,000-page plan to permanently plug the canal to re-separate the two watersheds, a project that would require extensive sewage treatment upgrades because much of Chicago’s treated waste would once again flow into Lake Michigan. The agency said the project, which would include a transfer station to move barge cargo over the barrier, would take decades to construct and cost as much as $18 billion — a schedule and price tag critics contend is wildly overblown. An engineering study funded by a group representing the Great Lakes region’s mayors and governors, in
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fact, concluded it could be done for as little as $4.25 billion and a barrier could be in place in a matter of years, not decades. The project remained on hold as of 2016, and its opponents are confident it never will happen. “I’ve been lobbying 25 years on behalf of industry,” said Mark Biel, the executive director of the Chemical Industry Council of Illinois. “I’m pretty good at killing bills and ideas that people come up with, and this one has all the elements you’d need.” Biel then listed those elements: the time it would take to accomplish; and the cost; the legal, regulatory, and political hurdles tied to sending at least some of Chicago’s treated wastewater back into Lake Michigan. “This is not going to happen in my lifetime,” the 51-year-old said. “And I don’t plan on dying anytime soon.” Peter Annin, a former Newsweek correspondent and author who also previously worked with Lodge at Notre Dame, takes a longer view. He expects pressure to patch the breach between the basins will surge every time a new invasive species is found heading for the canal — whether it’s swimming toward the Great Lakes or out of them, and into the
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
rest of the continent. “This is not about Asian carp,” Annin said. “This is about two artificially connected watersheds that many people argue never should have been connected.” The DNA evidence that Asian carp are swimming in Lake Michigan has mounted in recent years. It turned up some 200 miles north of Chicago in the waters of Wisconsin’s Door Peninsula in 2013. It turned up in 2014 in an inland river in the state of Michigan, one that flows into Lake Michigan. It also turned up in late 2014 in the Chicago River just about a block from the lakeshore. But these microscopic flecks, this genetic “smoke,” is all that researchers have found since the one and only Asian carp was plucked from waters above the barrier in 2010. The lack of fish flesh does not matter to Lodge’s colleague Chadderton, who has likened the genetic evidence to that of a murder scene. “If it was a single fingerprint on the murder weapon and in the house where the crime occurred, you might ask the question: Well, maybe not? But the reality is, we’ve got fingerprints all over the crime scene,” Chadderton said. “They’re on the body. They’re
on the knife. ... They’re smeared all over the place and they’re on the handle of the door into the house. It’s just like, come on people ... the reality is the body of the evidence says we’re dealing with live fish!” Yet for now, the electric barrier is the only defense between the Asian carp-infested Mississippi basin and the Lake Michigan shoreline, and this should make no one feel comfortable. In early 2014, I obtained from the Fish and Wildlife Service a video taken by an underwater camera at the barrier several months earlier. Just one three-minute clip revealed dozens of little fish swimming upstream through the swath of electrified water. Lab tests conducted on a scale model said this was not possible with the voltage the barrier is operating at, but nobody before had ever bothered to drop a sonar-like camera in the water to see what might actually be in the canal. The Army Corps brass remain nonplussed. “Those aren’t carp,” Peabody’s replacement, Brigadier General Margaret Burcham, told me in early 2014 in a conference room overlooking the downtown Chicago River — the very stretch of river
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FEATURE that the migrating carp would pass through on their way into Lake Michigan, a mile upstream. Burcham isn’t a fish expert; she has a graduate degree in computer science. Actual fishery experts weren’t nearly as confident in what Burcham claimed to see — or, more specifically, claimed to not see. “You can identify that they are fish. You can identify that they’re moving — you can see that,” Aaron Woldt, Fish and Wildlife’s deputy assistant regional director for fisheries, told me. “But you can’t tell [which] species.” The day an Army Corps general becomes convinced that an Asian carp invasion of the Great Lakes is under way — the day the fish regularly start turning up in nets above the electric barrier — is also a day it will probably be too late to do anything about it. A tiny private fish pond in Missouri offers a distressing glimpse of what might be in store for the Great Lakes. The owner had stocked his personal fishing hole with catfish, bass, and bluegills. He was pumping it full of fish food, yet the fish appeared to be starving. So in early 2010 he called in a pond consultant. “They came out with electrofishing gear, caught some fish and looked at them,” the Geological Survey’s Chapman said. “The fish were emaciated and he didn’t know why. He said, ‘There’s something wrong here. We need to start over again.’ They brought in rotenone and completely killed the pond.” Over the next week, the rotting carcasses of about 300 bighead carp surfaced. The smallest were 20 pounds. The big ones were a border collie-sized 35 pounds. “They looked like submarines coming out of the water,” said Chapman, who arrived on the scene in time to watch the last of the dead specimens surfacing. “They’d breach!” Poisoned Asian carp, Chapman explained, are different from many fish species in that they typically don’t float to the surface unless the water is warm enough for gases to build up in their bellies, a process that can take a week. Or it may never happen if the poisoning occurs in cold weather, as was the case during the December 2009 Chicago canal poisoning. It turned out that a decade earlier the previous property owner had stocked the tiny pond with a colony
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of bighead carp, one that eventually flourished right under the nose of the new owner, who had smelled trouble — but couldn’t see a thing. The biological bombshell that arrived at an Auburn University laboratory in 2009 came in the tiniest of packages — a cardboard
is devilishly clever: a developing carp turns female only after an enzyme transforms the male hormone androgen into the female hormone estrogen. This gene blocks production of that enzyme, so the embryonic fish cannot make the early-life transformation from male to female. The idea is that if you
Photo courtesy of Asian Carp Regional Coordinating Committee
Silver carp.
box about the size of a paperback book. Inside it were several plastic tubes that contained flecks so small that they were invisible. Lab workers tipped these tubes into a solution that was as innocuous looking as a glass of water. It was anything but. In it floated a designer “poison” potent enough to eradicate an entire fish population. The concoction, which held a specially modified fish gene built in a high-security laboratory on the Australian island of Tasmania, was placed into Petri dishes thick with E. coli bacteria and then dosed with a chemical that allowed the bacteria to absorb the genetic material. As the fast-reproducing E. coli numbers then exploded, copies of the gene replicated right along with it, with two new genes emerging each time a bacteria cell split. In a matter of hours the Auburn biologists had untold millions of E. coli, each carrying a strand of the manmade genetic code. And each of those strands held the power to take a species’ collective sex drive and throw it in reverse, to turn sexual reproduction from a life-sparking act into a life-snuffing one. It does so by adding a twist in the DNA so a fish implanted with the gene can produce only male offspring. The concept, called the “daughterless gene,”
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
plant enough of these daughterless fish into a lake or river for a sustained period, it’s just a matter of time until it runs out of females to carry on a population. The fish breed themselves to oblivion. It is no surprise this anti-carp technology was pioneered in Australia, a continent ravaged by invasive common carp that were imported by fish farmers. Those fish eventually — as almost always goes the story — escaped their containment ponds in floodwaters. It happened in the 1970s, right around the time Asian carp got loose in the United States. And as is the case with Asian carp in some stretches of river in the Mississippi basin — North America’s largest — common carp now account for as many as 90 percent of the fish in some areas of the Murray-Darling basin, Australia’s largest river system. Ron Thresher, an American who pioneered the DNA-based pest control at a research center in Tasmania, Australia, explained to me on a tour of his lab that the genes he works with are species-specific and pose no measurable risk to the public or any other type of fish or organism. Still, the lab’s security was extraordinary. To prevent any of the specimens carrying the gene from escaping into the wild, the lab windows were sledgehammer-proof.
The floors near the doors were raised in a manner so no water — or fish — could float out if a tank burst. The walls were waterproof to a level that they could contain all the water in all the aquariums holding the genetically manipulated fish. Pipes from the lab didn’t drain to the local sewer system. They led to a boiler for sterilization. If that boiler failed, there was a twin backup. An obvious worry is that if just one of these fish implanted with the daughterless gene were set loose in the wild the gene could, eventually, spread across the globe and ultimately eradicate all females of the targeted species in a manner that would doom it to extinction. But Thresher said his team specifically designed their carp gene so that once it reaches the third generation, the fish that carry it only automatically generate males in half of their offspring. The other half of their progeny is half male and half female. The gene’s impact would be halved similarly in the next generation, and so on, all in a manner that its effect on any fish population’s sex ratio would disappear over time. This, Thresher explained, means hatchery-raised stocks of the daughterless fish would have to be planted for multiple generations to knock out a local population. (Thresher said it is in fact possible to design a gene that ensures allmale progeny in every subsequent generation in a manner that could spark an extinction. “In theory, the release of a single carrier of one of these could doom a population. Not surprisingly, there is considerable debate about the risk,” he told me. “We deliberately went for our approach because it is inherently much safer and we thought it wise to walk before one runs, in terms of recombinant genes to manage an invasive pest.”) After Thresher proved the gene worked in a type of fast-reproducing minnow in his lab, the next step was to figure out how to do the same thing with common carp, a much more daunting project given the larger size of the fish and the fact that it can take them years to reach sexual maturity. This means that tracking the gene down through several generations requires the better part of a decade, or more. A carp experiment similar to the one done on minnows in Thresher’s lab also had to be scaled up from aquariums to ponds to see if the genetically modified fish could woo normal females in a more natural setting; the gene is useless, after all,
if their carriers fail to get it into the next generation. Thresher found a partner in Auburn’s Rex Dunham, who in 2009 cleared the paperwork with his university to take delivery of Thresher’s carp-eliminating gene. By early 2015 he was preparing to produce a third generation of daughterless carp at a gated research facility just north of the Auburn campus in eastern Alabama, about two hours south of Atlanta. The largest, most sexually matured fish — all males — were already swimming inside a fenced-in fish pond inside a barbed wire-capped chain-link fence that pulsed with low-voltage electricity to keep out potential predators like raccoons. The pond was also further covered with fine black netting to keep birds from plucking a fish from the water and lifting it off alive. The pond drained through a pipe with a screen on it. That pipe drained into a lower pond that drained through a sieve too fine for a large fish to flush through. That pond, in turn, flowed into a reservoir that had been purposely stocked with predator fish in case fish from ponds and tanks above somehow made it that far. Dunham called the whole setup “zealous,” but it was clear he, like Thresher, takes the security issue seriously. Dunham received about $100,000 from the Australians to conduct early research with his carp, but by the time I visited all that funding had dried up and he was doing the work basically for free. He said he was motivated by the mess invasive species have made across the globe — common carp in Australia; pythons in Florida; Asian carp in the rivers of his home state of Illinois. “To have the potential to rectify our past environmental mistakes, to me, it’s just intriguing and exciting that we could go back and do that,” he said. “There are very few proven ways to go back and fix your mistakes, and the potential here is to eradicate a nuisance fish species, without poisoning a river or a lake or harming other fish. To me, that’s an ethical thing to do.” Thresher was quick to acknowledge the potential for political backlash for planting daughterless fish in the wild and said he is happy to leave it up to the politicians to decide whether, when, where and how to deploy such a genetic tool. It’s a decision that may take center stage sooner than people expect. Thresher predicts genetic solutions to invasive species problems would be “widely
available” by the early 2020s, and he wasn’t talking just carp. “The basic technology, once it’s up and running,” he said, “I think will be applicable to a wide range of things.” Mussels included? “Mussels included.” This has Russ Van Herick intrigued, and not a little wary. He heads a think tank funded by the Great Lakes states to develop creative solutions to some of the lakes’ most vexing problems, and that has him thinking about how to use — or not use — a DNA-based eradication tool that he, too, is convinced is on the horizon. He wonders who will make the decision to deploy it. In the 1960s the state of Michigan decided on its own to plant exotic salmon, even though it was clear at the time the fish would not stay contained in Michigan waters. Would a single Great Lakes state today try to act on its own and release a manmade gene in a similar fashion? If not, would it take a unanimous vote by all the Great Lakes states? What about the Canadian provinces? What about the federal governments? What about the prospect of mischievous, if well meaning, individuals or groups acting on their own? “We are not even close to developing a governance system to catch up with these emerging technologies,” Van Herick said. And if science does someday allow us to recast the characters in the Great Lakes in a manner never before possible, how do we decide what those characters should be? Do we continue to manage the lakes for maximum sport fishing fun and maybe even modify certain species so they fight harder and have tastier flesh? Do we farm the lakes for energy-producing, genetically modified algae? Or do we try to resuscitate any and all native species in any way possible? One person long ago figured out where to start. “A thing is right when it tends to promote the integrity, beauty and stability of the biotic community,” famed Wisconsin naturalist Aldo Leopold wrote in 1949, which happened to be the peak of the lamprey invasion. “It is wrong when it tends otherwise.” Perhaps that’s as good a place as any to start.
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Dan Egan is a reporter at the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel and a two-time Pulitzer Prize finalist.
scene@clevescene.com t@clevelandscene | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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OYSTERS SEAFOOD CRAFT COCKTAILS LIVE MUSIC
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SATURDAY, OCTOBER 21 11 AM-2:30 PM Celebrate your favorite briny bivalves at Scene Magazine’s Shuck Yeah! on Saturday, October 21 from 11 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. This party on the water will bring together oysters from both coasts for a celebration of all things oyster and other bites from your favorite Zack Bruell Restaurants. Enjoy craft cocktails from Tito’s Handmade Vodka and beer plus live music from Madison Crawl, all at Alley Cat Oyster Bar.
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
everything you should do this week
GET OUT WED
Photo courtesy of rheabutcher.com
10/04
An Akron native, comedian Rhea Butcher returns to her home state with her wife and fellow comedian Cameron Esposito at the Ohio Theatre. See: Tuesday.
FAMILY FUN
2 for $20 Promotion Great Lakes Science Center and the Greater Cleveland Aquarium have teamed up for a special fall 2-for$20 package. From today through Saturday, guests can explore both downtown attractions for just $20. Tickets purchased online must be redeemed first at the attraction from which they were purchased. Both attractions have a common goal and aim to get their guests to “really consider the world around them and their roles in it.” Combo 2-for-$20 tickets can be purchased online, or get them at each box office during the two weeks of the promotion. (Jeff Niesel) greaterclevelandaquarium.com or greatscience.com. MUSIC
Chamber Music in the Galleries This monthly concert series at the Cleveland Museum of Art places young musicians from the Cleveland Institute of Music and Case Western Reserve University in the CMA galleries. Now in its sixth season, the series features “mixed programs of chamber music” for “a unique and intimate experience.” The performances often feature instruments from the museum’s keyboard collection. Tonight’s concert begins at 6 and lasts for about an hour. Admission is free. (Niesel) 11150 East Blvd., 216-421-7350, clevelandart.org.
10/06
FAMILY FUN
Rock and Art, about Belkin’s career as a rock promoter/manager/record producer. The rock-themed menu includes Korn chowder, meatloaf and chocolate cake. (Niesel) 1148 Main Ave., 216-242-1250, musicboxcle.com.
Keep Talking Keep Talking is an exciting storytellers program where locals can share their real-life experiences on a theme. The series offers attendees the chance to grab a drink and a dog while listening to some of their Cleveland neighbors tell tall tales. The theme for tonight’s event is “School.” It starts at 8 p.m. at the Happy Dog in Gordon Square. Admission is $5. (Niesel) 5801 Detroit Ave., 216-651-9474, happydogcleveland.com.
Therapy Studio tonight (and every first Thursday night) from 6 to 7:30 for an evening of inspiration, artmaking and community connection. Tonight’s edition is all about painting and poetry: Attendees will have a chance to experiment with some very fluid and abstract watercolor techniques and gather meaningful words from old books and magazines (or write an original haiku) to collage onto their paintings. A $5 admission fee covers the cost of supplies, and all materials are provided. At least five reservations are required for the class to be held. Please RSVP by calling the Art Therapy Studio directly at 216-791-9303, or by emailing mepps@spacesgallery.org. (Josh Usmani) 2900 Detroit Ave., 216-621-2314, spacesgallery.org.
MUSIC
SPORTS
Skipper’s Alley The Conservancy for Cuyahoga Valley National Park partners with the National Park Service to bring live music to the Cuyahoga Valley. Tonight, Skipper’s Alley, a modern Irish folk band that takes an oldschool approach, performs at 7 p.m. at Happy Days Lodge. Tickets are $21. (Niesel) 500 West Streetsboro Rd., Peninsula, 330-657-2909, ConservancyforCVNP.org.
Indians versus TBD After this season’s historic 22-game winning streak, expectations remain high for the Indians as they enter the post-season. The Tribe’s winning record ensures the team will begin the American League Divisional Series at home so the Tribe will play today and tomorrow’s games at Progressive Field. Expect to see ace Corey Kluber take the mound for at least one of the games (the pitching rotation was yet to be determined at press time). He’s in the running (again) for the coveted Cy Young award. Tickets are sold out but bars throughout Northeast Ohio will show the broadcast. (Niesel) 2401 Ontario St., 216-420-4487, clevelandindians.com.
SPOKEN WORD
SPOKEN WORD
Cleveland Stories Dinner Party Cleveland Stories Dinner Party is a weekly series that pairs fine food with storytelling. Through it, the folks at Music Box Supper Club hope to raise awareness of the mission of the Western Reserve Historical Society’s new Cleveland History Center, by “bring(ing) to life some of the fun, interesting stories about Cleveland’s past — from sports, to rock ’n’ roll, to Millionaires’ Row,” as it’s put in a press release. Admission is free, with no cover charge, although a prix fixe dinner, designed to complement the night’s theme, is $20. Doors open at 5 p.m., dinner is served at 6, and the storytelling starts at 7. Tonight, Mike Belkin and Carlo Wolff discuss their new book, Mike Belkin: Socks, Sports,
FRI
THU
10/05
ART
Art Therapy Studio Join Spaces and members of the Art
Cantina Nights With Star Wars: The Last Jedi premiering in theaters on Dec. 15, fans around the world are waiting with anticipation for the next chapter in the epic saga. On Friday and Saturday nights, from tonight through Oct. 28, the Cleveland Brewery is transforming into the Mos Eisley Cantina from Star Wars: A New Hope, for Cantina Nights. Step into the infamous bar from Tatooine, the desert home of Luke Skywalker, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. Figrin d’ and the Modal Nodes will perform, and organizers promise appearances from rebels like Han Solo, Chewbacca, and Jedi knights, as well as Stormtroopers, Greedo, Ponda Baba and more. You can dress in costume and bring the kids for photos too. Hours are 6 to 10 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays throughout October. (Usmani) 777 East 185th St., 216-534-6992, theclevelandbrewery.com. FAMILY FUN
FireFish Festival For the third consecutive year, James Levin’s FireFish Festival transforms downtown Lorain into a venue for art installations, performances and live music. This year’s festival expands to two days, running from 5 to 10 p.m. today and from 2 to 11 p.m. tomorrow. Lorain’s storefronts and vacant buildings will be transformed into art installations and pop-up art galleries showcasing local artists. Music and performances will take place on a main stage, as well as balconies, alleys, empty storefronts, fire escapes and more. Broadway Avenue itself will be transformed into an interactive piece of art, featuring a video installation by Kevin Jackson on the old post office building. The fun kicks off on Friday night with a concert from regional music groups. As always, the fest culminates with a percussion parade and the burning of the ceremonial fish. Admission is free. (Usmani) firefishfestival.com. MUSIC
The Lazy Daisy Festival The JiMiller Band will perform all Grateful Dead songs at the annual | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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GET OUT Lazy Daisy Festival, a three-day affair that commences today at Nelson Ledges Quarry Park. The Ice Cream Truckers and the Rusty Haywackers will also perform at the intimate, family friendly festival. Pre-sale tickets are $45 for the whole weekend, and that includes camping, swimming, hiking and all music. (Niesel) 12001 State Route 282, Garrettsville, 440-548-2716, nlqp.com.
ART
ART
Sketchbook Heroes: Caricatures of Rock Legends Loftworks Gallery showcases a diverse collection of artwork by the International Society of Caricature Artists this fall. Featuring an extensive collection of cartoon rock icons, Sketchbook Heroes: Caricatures of Rock Legends includes 16 artists who have created work for clients such as Time Magazine, Mad Magazine, Sports
Walk All Over Waterloo As part of tonight’s Walk All Over Waterloo gallery stroll, Waterloo Arts hosts an opening reception from 5 to 9 p.m. for Memory External: Works by Matthew Gallagher and Michael Lombardy. The exhibition’s title refers to our memory’s externalization “as frozen moments that build history, cultures and our understanding of reality.” Gallagher studied studio art at Oberlin, but
FILM
2-for-1 admission in Oct.
Mali Blues Four Malian pop singers star in Mali Blues, a documentary about how the country’s biggest acts perform in opposition to Islamic fundamentalists who want to ban secular music and dance in Mali. Directed by Lutz Gregor, the film shows at 7 tonight at the Cleveland Museum of Art, where it also screens at 1:30 p.m. on Sunday. Tickets are $10, or $7 for CMA members. (Niesel) 11150 East Blvd., 216-421-7350, clevelandart.org.
Haven’t experienced the Power of Rock? Still need to see 2017 Inductee spotlights like Pearl Jam and Tupac? NOW is the time! This OCTOBER ONLY, get your butt over to the Rock Hall Box Office and grab 2 tix to tour for the price of 1!
THEATER
A Midsummer Night’s Dream A group of would-be actors engage in “a joyful celebration of love lost, transformed and restored” in Shakespeare’s classic comedy A Midsummer Night’s Dream. The Great Lakes Theater production of the play opens tonight at 7:30 at the Hanna Theatre, where it continues through Nov. 5. Tickets are $15 to $80. (Niesel) 2067 East 14th St., 216-241-6000, playhousesquare.org.
Photo by Henry Diltz
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ART FUNDRAISER
A Diamond in the Hough The Morgan Conservatory celebrates its 10th anniversary tonight from 6:30 to 10 with A Diamond in the Hough: Gala and Silent Auction, featuring works by Tom Balbo. A Cleveland artist producing work for over 30 years, Balbo has dedicated his life to preserving the art of traditional papermaking and was instrumental to establishing the Morgan Conservatory. He continues to help steer it as its artistic director. In addition to showcasing 10 of his works, the silent auction will feature more than 100 works by artists in 10 categories, including papermakers, book artists and printmakers, as well as works from regional and national artists and local vendor specialty items. In addition to the silent auction, the gala includes live music from Glenn Holmes Trio, a cash bar and hors d’oeuvres. General admission is $40, Morgan members are $35 and students are $25 with valid ID. VIP admission is $100, and includes early entry and an exclusive bar and hors d’oeuvres. Get tickets by phone, through the Morgan website or at the door. (Usmani) 1754 East 47th St., 216-361-9255, morganconservatory.org. SPOKEN WORD
NIGHTLIFE
Mix: 케이팝 (K-Pop) Celebrate K-Pop, the worldwide dance and music phenomenon, tonight at the Cleveland Museum of Art, in conjunction with the current exhibition, Chaekgeori: Pleasure of Possessions in Korean Painted Screens. The CMA’s atrium will be filled with the sounds of K-Pop from an NYC K-Pop DJ, and the Yin Tang Dance Company will perform and teach mashups of popular K-Pop routines. MIX hours are 6 to 10 p.m. Advance tickets are $10, $15 day of event, or free for CMA members. Parking is available in the museum’s parking garage for $10. Chaekgeori remains on view through Nov. 5 in the Julia and Larry Pollock Focus Gallery. (Usmani) 11150 East Blvd., 216-421-7350, clevelandart.org.
see and do throughout the Waterloo Arts District. Admission is free. (Usmani) waterlooarts.org.
Must present valid ID at Box Office with ZIP code beginning in 440, 441, 442 or 443. One offer per ID presented. Valid only for adult general admission tickets. Not valid for special events. Subject to availability. Not valid with any other discount or promotional offer. Not valid towards the purchase of a two-day pass. Offer valid October 1st through October 31st, 2017.
1100 Rock and Roll Boulevard | rockhall.com/visit
A Book Reading and Signing Andrea Thome, a former Miss Ohio who grew up in Cleveland, has just published her new novel, Seeds of Intention. The wife of the now-retired Tribe slugger celebrates the book’s release today from 1 to 3 p.m. with a book reading and signing at Fireside Books in Chagrin Falls. She’ll donate proceeds from the sales of the book to the Jimmy Malone Scholarship Program. (Niesel) 29 North Franklin St., Chagrin Falls, 440-247-4050, firesidebookshop.com. SHOPPING
Illustrated Kids, the animated television show Family Guy, and more. The show opens today with a reception from 5 to 8 p.m. and remains on view through Oct. 22. The gallery will be selling original artwork as well as prints and books. Admission is free. (Usmani) East 40th St. #1A, 440-479-9441, loftworksgallery.com.
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
his work is produced through several self-taught techniques. A graduate of the Cleveland Institute of Art, Lombardy is a printmaker who creates his own apparel. Both artists work in Midtown and share an interest in research and methodbased processes. Memory External remains on view through Nov. 3. Of course, there’s always plenty more to
The Cleveland Bazaar Formerly known as the Bazaar Bizarre Cleveland, the Cleveland Bazaar is the longest-running indie craft show in Northeast Ohio. It has hosted markets and events across the region for more than a decade. Although its largest event takes place every December at 78th Street Studios, the Cleveland
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Bazaar hosts pop-up events year ’round. This summer, the Cleveland Bazaar has hosted several events in Market Square Park, at the intersection of West 25th Street and Lorain Avenue. The next Bazaar takes place today from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Come early to shop at the West Side Market and stay for lunch or dinner on one of West 25th Street’s many outdoor patios. Can’t make it this time? Cleveland Bazaar’s final Market Square event of the season takes place on Saturday, Oct. 21. Admission is free. (Usmani) West 25th and Lorain Rd., clevelandbazaar.org. ART & MUSIC
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MOCA’s Birthday Bash In honor of the five-year anniversary of its Farshid Moussavi-designed building, as well as its fall exhibitions, MOCA Cleveland is hosting a free community day today from noon to midnight. The day includes family-friendly activities, panel discussions with senior curator Andria Hickey and featured artists from the current exhibitions, which guests can explore throughout the day. Additionally, WRUW StudioA-Rama presents live music every hour from 2 p.m. to midnight in Toby’s Plaza, headlined at 10:30 p.m. by Sweet Spirit with special guests New Bomb Turks and This Moment in Black History. Following the event, the Happy Dog at the Euclid Tavern hosts a midnight afterparty. MOCA Cleveland’s Fall 2017 exhibitions include the first U.S. museum solo show by British artist Phil Collins (not the musician) and A Poet*hical Wager, a group exhibition of contemporary abstract artists from around the world who use abstraction to convey complex feelings and concepts that can’t be portrayed through representational imagery. Admission is free. (Usmani). 11400 Euclid Ave., 216-421-8671, mocacleveland.org.
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The Craft Cleveland Cinemas’ Late Shift Series, a program dedicated to the nostalgic cult and camp cinema that we love and cherish even though it’s certainly not Oscar-worthy material, has been a fixture at the local chain of theaters since 2006. The 2017 schedule continues tonight with The Craft, a film about four high school students who suffer some serious fallout after they mess with witchcraft. It screens at 9:30 and midnight tonight and at 7 tomorrow night at the Cedar Lee Theatre.
Tickets are $6. (Niesel) 2163 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, 440-717-4696, clevelandcinemas.com. FESTIVAL
East Bank Bacon Festival The Hunger Network of Greater Cleveland aims to reduce hunger in Cleveland by providing nutritious food to over 45,000 residents each month, more than 31 percent of whom are children. Cuyahoga County’s largest direct emergency food distribution network, the nonprofit serves 6.5 million meals per year as it allocates 94 percent of every dollar raised to buying food for those in need. Today, the Hunger Network hosts the inaugural East Bank Bacon Festival, a fundraising festival. The event takes place from noon to 10 p.m. on the East Bank of the Flats. Admission is free. The day will feature a “bacon-infused menu” catered by local restaurants and chefs. The food will be paired with craft beer and there will be live music. All proceeds go to the Hunger Network. (Niesel) hungernetwork.org. SPORTS
Monsters vs. Rockford Icehogs The Monsters, our city’s beloved minor league hockey team, kicks off the 2017-2018 season today at the Q with a game against the Rockford Icehogs. As is usually the case on opening night, the first 10,000 fans will receive a magnetic schedule with detachable car magnet. There’s also a Socktober Sock Drive, and the team encourages fans to donate a pack of new socks to benefit local homeless shelters. The game begins at 7 p.m., and tickets start at $10. (Niesel) 1 Center Court, 216-420-2000, theqarena.com. FILM
Rocky Horror Picture Show It’s the first Saturday of the month again, so tonight the Cedar Lee Theatre hosts a midnight screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, the 1975 cult classic that still draws an exuberant, costumed crowd that likes to throw rice and dry toast and sing along to the songs in the movie. Tickets are $9.50. (Niesel) 2163 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, 216-321-5411, clevelandcinemas.com.
SUN
10/08
SPORTS
Browns Versus New York Jets The Browns almost notched their first win of the season when they went up against the Indianapolis
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Coming Attractions On Sale Friday!
KATHLEEN MADIGAN Boxed Wine and Bigfoot
February 1 Beatle’s celebration!
1964 – THE TRIBUTE October 13
GROUNDWORKS October 13 & 14
PAULA POUNDSTONE October 20
Colts during Week 3 of the season. But the team came up just a few points short despite a remarkable second-half comeback that saw the defense really step up. Today the Browns take on the New York Jets, a team that’s also going through some rebuilding. Given that the Jets haven’t gotten off to a great start, this should be a winnable game for the Browns. Kickoff is at 1 p.m. at First Energy Stadium. Tickets start at $50. (Niesel) 100 Alfred Lerner Way, 440-891-5000, clevelandbrowns.com. MUSIC
Ed Caner & Friends A founding member of the local band Hey Mavis, fiddler Ed Caner has performed with both local and national acts. For today’s show at the Hines Hill Conference Center in Peninsula, he’ll perform with musica guests from Hey Mavis, along with the Amethyst String Quartet. Expect to hear music from Cuba, Mexico, Spain, Brazil and Argentina. The concert begins at 7 p.m. Tickets are $25 on Eventbrite; details are on the calendar at the website below. (Niesel) 1403 West Hines Hill Rd., Peninsula, 216-479-8611, conservancyforcvnp.org. FAMILY FUN
Best-selling humorist
DAVID SEDARIS October 27 Get The Led Out Johnny Mathis A Night with Janis Joplin Dave Koz 20th Christmas Tour: David Benoit, Rick Braun, Peter White, Selina Albright
GET OUT
Nov. 1 Nov. 3 Nov. 9
Dec. 7
Gospel Brunch The monthly Gospel Brunch has been a spiritual Sunday staple for years at the House of Blues. Curated by famed gospel singer Kirk Franklin, the recently reinvigorated show puts a bit more emphasis on the music. As for the food, the allyou-can-eat musical extravaganza features Southern classics like chicken jambalaya, biscuits and gravy, and chicken and waffles. Seatings are offered at 11 a.m. Tickets are $40 and are available online, by phone or at the box office. (Niesel) 308 Euclid Ave., 216-523-2583, houseofblues.com. SPOKEN WORD
216-241-6000 Group Sales 216-640-8600 playhousesquare.org
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Pod Tours America Barack Obama’s head speechwriter from 2005 to 2013, Jon Favreau has hit the road to speak about politics and speechwriting. He currently writes for the online Daily Beast and podcast network Ringer and started a political podcast in Los Angeles with three of his friends,
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
Jon Lovett, Dan Pfeiffer and Tommy Vietor. Tonight’s event, dubbed Pod Tours America, features all four of the podcasters and promises to offer “a no-bullshit conversation about politics, the press, and the challenges posed by the Trump presidency.” The show begins at 8 p.m. at the State Theatre. Tickets are $49.50. (Niesel) 1501 Euclid Ave., 216-241-6000, playhousesquare.org.
the region to the club on the banks of the Cuyahoga River, so they can talk about science topics. Tonight at 7, physician Thomas Gilson, the medical examiner of Cuyahoga County, will discuss the opiod epidemic. Admission is free. (Niesel) 1148 Main Ave., 216-242-1250, musicboxcle.com.
FAMILY FUN
FILM
Run for Re-Entry Proceeds from today’s Edwins Leadership & Restaurant Institute Run for Re-Entry, a 5-K run or 1-mile walk, will support Edwins’ mission. The restaurant aims to “teach a skilled trade in the culinary arts, empower willing minds through passion for the hospitality industry and prepare students for a successful transition home.” Walkers and runners will receive a race T-shirt, and there will be age group awards. There will also be live music and post-race refreshments and food prepared by Edwins. It costs $25 to $32 to run, $15 to $22 to walk. The event begins at 10 a.m. on Shaker Square. (Niesel) edwinsrestaurant.org/run2017/.
Dawn of the Dead For years the film Dawn of the Dead, George A. Romero’s sequel to Night of the Living Dead, couldn’t be shown on the big screen because it was out of print. But producer Richard Rubinstein recently made a new digital print of the movie available. In homage to the late Romero, who passed away this summer, the film screens tonight at 7:30 at the Cedar Lee Theatre. Tickets are $10. (Niesel) 2163 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, 216-321-5411, clevelandcinemas.com.
MON
10/09
FUNDRAISER
The Coit Road Farmers Market’s Taste of Autumn Benefi t For tonight’s Taste of Autumn Benefit, farmers from the Coit Road Farmers Market will supply the ingredients and local culinarians and chefs will turn them into delicious dishes. The talent roster includes Bryce Jordan (Beachland Ballroom), food writer Tricia Chaves, Paul DeMelto (Culinarchy @ Cultivation Kitchen), Tino Enriquez (Coquette Patisserie), Chandra Morgan-Henley (No Wheat No Worries), Darrel Moore (Paragon Wine, Martinis & Plates), personal chef Lisa Pucci Delgado and Rus Welch (Moveable Feast Supper Club). The benefit includes live music, a cash bar and a raffle. It takes place from 6 to 9 at the Slovenian Workmen’s Home. Tickets are $35. (Niesel) 15335 Waterloo Rd., coitmarket.org. SPOKEN WORD
Science Cafe The second Monday of each month, Music Box Supper Club hosts Science Cafe, an informal lecture series that brings scientists from throughout
TUE
10/10
COMEDY
Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher An Ohio native, comedian Rhea Butcher returns to her home state with her wife and fellow comedian Cameron Esposito for tonight’s show at the Ohio Theatre, part of their multi-city Back To Back standup tour. The two are the creators and stars of the hit TV comedy series Take My Wife, the first TV show co-created and co-starring a gay married couple. Expect “edgy and human takes on love, identity and pop culture” when they take the stage tonight both individually and together. The performance begins at 8. Tickets are $32.50. (Niesel) 1501 Euclid Ave., 216-241-6000, playhousesquare.org. FILM
Marie Curie: The Courage of Knowledge Director Marie Noelle helms Marie Curie: The Courage of Knowledge, a biopic about the Nobel Prize-winning physicist and chemist who had an unconventional approach to both her professional and personal life. The movie screens at 7 tonight and again at 1:30 p.m. on Sunday at the Cleveland Museum of Art. Tickets are $10, or $7 for CMA members. (Niesel) 11150 East Blvd., 216-421-7350, clevelandart.org.
Find more events @clevescene.com t@clevelandscene
“A First Class Act..A Talented True Artist, Brilliant Mind, A Heart of Gold, A Glowing Personality.... An Entertainer of All Times...” Papote Varet | Stage Director/Las Vegas, NV “Billy Donato Lifts the Ceiling at the Tropicana!” Hillary L. Green | ShowBiz/ Las Vegas, NV
SATURDAY, OCTOBER 14, 2017 Sirna’s Café | 795 Broadway Ave. Bedford
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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ART THERE AND BACK AGAIN ARTneo opens Judith Salomon retrospective THE FIRST TIME I SAW JUDITH Salomon’s ceramics work was back in 1990, around the time she was awarded the Cleveland Arts Prize. I awoke to the more angular possibilities of my morning cup of joe. This past April I finally acquired my very own Salomon: It is a sharply angled, empowering cup that accompanies me into my morning writing and studio sessions. When I heard about Beyond Function, a retrospective of her artwork, I immediately tuned in. Judith Salomon is a badass in the mud world; containers and containment are her thing. She started working with clay and making pots after taking a class when she was 16 years old. “It may be a corny thing to say, but it spoke to me,” the artist said about her medium in her Cleveland Arts Prize video. The ceramicist’s works are all hand-slab-built and functional. Her work is in private collections as well as in more than 20 major public collections spanning the globe, including the Los Angeles County Museum of Art; the Gardiner Museum of Ceramic Art in Toronto; the Victoria and Albert Museum in London; and the National Museum of History in Taipei, Taiwan, as well as the Cleveland Museum of Art. Walking into Beyond Function, we are hailed by Salomon’s ceramics from the 1970s. “Very few people have seen this work in Cleveland, as it has never been exhibited here,” says Christopher Richards, curator and collections manager at ARTneo. “She always wanted to make something that is functional, even though it didn’t always function the way she wanted it to; but the idea of a functional piece was always important to her.” It is easy to recognize the influence of Japanese packaging in this early work. The artist uses rope and raffia to bind the pieces together. Integrating cast paper pulp and clay, Salomon exorcises her interest in mass and weight in five sculptures that are deceptively light. Earth tones, the colors of soil and concrete, dominate. They are examples of the tones of the times. The evolution from neutrals to layered color, and from rounded edges to razor sharp ones, transitions us
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Image courtesy of Judith Salomon
By Dott von Schneider
“White Vase,” by Judith Salomon
BEYOND FUNCTION THROUGH NOV. 17 AT ARTNEO, 1305 WEST 89TH ST., 216-227-9507 ARTNEO.ORG
right into the 1980s. In 1977 Salomon began teaching at the Cleveland Institute of Art, where she was not only influential, but also influenced by how her students were using color. Salomon started creating cake platters and experimenting with form and shapes. Her studio was in the Flats where she observed and studied
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
the architectural elements outside. This atmosphere became an erector set for her Stadium Bowls. Again emphasizing weight and illusion, the bowls, which resemble a stadium or arena, are hollow and in two parts, almost creating a cake to hang atop the platter. “Large White Vase” and “Knotched Rectangular Vase” are
both over two feet tall and exude the nostalgia of jelly nougats, those little white candies riddled with chewy fruit jellies. Again, we see the influence of color and architecture that Salomon is known for. Pulling together a retrospective of an artist’s work can be daunting, but this is not the case with Salomon, whose record keeping was key to successfully pulling together the artworks. Garth Clark, who had represented Salomon’s work in his galleries in New York, Kansas City and Los Angeles for about 10 years, advised her to make sure she kept at least one example of each series she created, a keen piece of advice she passed on to her students. The artist retired in 2015 and her former students still hold her in the highest regard. “She is my clay mother,” says Brian Sarama, adjunct professor of ceramics and a ceramic technician at Cuyahoga Community College. “Not only was she willing to help during class hours, she was more than willing to go out of her way to do anything we needed. Her generosity knows no bounds. There was a period of six months where she made me a key for her studio and let me work there free of charge, just so I could keep working. She got me to push myself and take risks and continues to do so.” Val Grossman, founder and director at BRICK Ceramic + Design Studio, echoes those sentiments. “Judith is a guiding light in the studio. Her insights were always, and continue to be, spot on. She reminds me to edit, and I pass down her advice to my students, that sometimes the less you touch clay, the better. She continues to be a mentor in my life and career and genuinely cares about her students. In school she had that intuition to ask us how we were doing outside the studio and knew that it affected what we were producing. She is such a gem to have in Cleveland.” Beyond Function leaves us wanting the artist’s influence to continue. As the artist, herself, says, “If you really want to be a practicing artist, it’s that you’re really never done.”
scene@clevescene.com t@clevelandscene
Photo by Roger Mastroianni
STAGE HUNCHBACK AS HEARTTHROB The wonderfully polished production at Great Lakes Theater needs another wart or two By Christine Howey WE ALL LOVE A YARN ABOUT outcasts who try to surmount enormous obstacles, even if the final goal is doomed to fail. Hell, that’s why people still attend Cleveland Browns’ games. With that in mind, Great Lakes Theater presents The Hunchback of Notre Dame, a full scale, ballsto-the-wall theatrical production that tells the story of the recluse bell-ringer with aspirations, made famous in the Victor Hugo novel Notre-Dame de Paris. In the book, that unfortunate fellow named Quasimodo was a horrible apparition, with a huge wart covering one eye and his humpback causing a crumpled posture. In recent years, thanks to the animated 1996 Disney film that inspired this production, Quasi has gotten a bit better looking. And in this stage version, the transformation of Quasimodo’s appearance from puke-in-yourmouth ghastly to sort of boyband-cute is complete. Gone is the huge wart or any facial deformity, allowing this Quasimodo to better assimilate and become a character who is a mix of The Man of La Mancha, the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, and Rex, the Wonder Dog. Before we get into the weeds of the material (music by Alan Menken and lyrics by Stephen Schwartz — both Broadway heavyweights — along with a book by Peter Parnell, all based on the Hugo novel with songs from the animated Disney film), let’s pause to commend Great Lakes Theater for an outstanding production. It is directed by Victoria Bussert and features exceptional work by the designers: Jeff Herrmann’s massive set, Mary Jo Dondlinger’s evocative lighting, David Gotwald’s enveloping sound, and Martha Bromelmeier’s period costumes. They fill the Hanna stage with myriad sensory pleasures. Add to that an on-stage chorus (the Baldwin Wallace Choral Studies
Program under the direction of Marc Weagraff) that contributes substantial vocal heft to many of the songs. This gives the tunes the aural feel of a mini-Mormon Tabernacle Choir and the result, guided by the baton of music director Joel Mercier, is lush indeed. As for the story, set in 15th century Paris, it is told in an almost embarrassingly simplistic manner. Right from the meta-ish start, when the performer Corey Mach comes out to don his costume with the shoulder hump so he can portray Quasimodo, we are aware we are being told a story. And this format continues as the tale is narrated, storybook-style, by the King of the Gypsies. Thus, we are led by the hand through the exposition dealing with Quasi’s birth to an anonymous gypsy woman and Jehan Frollo, a young man who dies and leaves the infant in the care of his older, coldhearted brother Dom Claude Frollo, the Archdeacon of the Notre Dame Cathedral. After taking a glance at the ugly baby, Frollo winces and names the child Quasimodo, which means “half-formed,” thereby rejecting other options such as Pierre, Enzo or Fred. Saddled with that self-esteem defeating moniker, the kid grows up to be the captive of Frollo, ringing the bell in the church tower, developing some monster pecs, and
Quasimodo (Corey Mach) is reprimanded by Dom Claude Frollo (Tom Ford) in the Great Lakes Theater production of The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
not just the bell rope he’s yanking. Trouble is, nasty Frollo is also smitten by Esmeralda, as is studmuffin Phoebus De Martin, Captain of the Cathedral Guard (picture Gaston from Beauty and the Beast, with slightly less ego). Numerous songs are trotted out to flesh out this quadrangle of passion until the downbeat conclusion. In the title role, Strongsville native Mach sings with power, particularly in two solos engineered to trigger audience oohs and ahhs. These are “Heaven’s Light,” in which he expresses his budding feelings for Esmeralda, and the
THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME THROUGH NOV. 4 AT GREAT LAKES THEATER, HANNA THEATRE, 2067 EAST 14TH ST., 216-241-6000, GREATLAKESTHEATER.ORG
never going outside where he will be vilified by a grossed-out populace. That is, until the gargoyles he converses with encourage him to check out a few streets near the cathedral. When he sneaks out, he encounters a young gypsy enchantress named Esmeralda doing a sultry dance, and soon it’s
penultimate ditty, “Made of Stone,” when he croons with his gargoyle pals prior to his last-second rescue of Esmeralda from being burned at the stake. Mach also adds some chuckles to the proceedings with his off-hand delivery of the easy jokes tucked here and there. But his boyish good looks defy the
monstrosity that his character is supposed to look like, no matter how much he tries to contort his face and body. Mach is more than matched in vocal chops by Keri Rene Fuller as Esmeralda, who almost stops the show with her beautiful rendition of “God Help the Outcasts.” As Dom Claude Frollo, Tom Ford channels some of the bile he dredged up from playing the demon barber Sweeney Todd a couple years ago, and he lands the bass notes of his songs with the thump of authority. Also turning in solid performances are Jon Loya as Phoebus, Alex Syiek as the ever-informative King of the Gypsies and, in a neat trick of stage illusion, Dan Hoy as a decapitated Saint Aphrodisius. Thanks to the sure hand of director Bussert, it all works as a sumptuous theatrical treat. But perhaps due to its cartoon lineage, it lacks the impact of that other musical made from a Hugo novel: Les Miserables.
scene@clevescene.com t@christinehowey | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
Photos by Emanuel Wallace
EAT
THE SWEET SPOT Molto Bene hits on a recipe for success in Lakewood By Douglas Trattner ON A RECENT WEEKEND NIGHT, Molto Bene in Lakewood appeared to be the busiest place on Earth. Every seat in the dining room was filled, as was the small waiting area, and diners still continued to cycle in and get added to the list. Other customers dropped by to pick up take-out orders, joined by others still who were popping in simply to grab a scoop or cone of gelato from the cashier. Throughout it all, servers were left to navigate the narrow channels like nimble tailbacks slicing through an offensive line. Granted, Molto Bene, which opened its doors two months ago, seats only 30 guests and does not accept reservations, but still. Judging by the immediate and overwhelming reaction to the place, you’d think that they had birthed a cuisine and decided, through generosity of spirit, to give it away. Neither, of course, is true. What the restaurant does do is take a very familiar concept (Italian-American), repackage it in an attractive manner, and serve it up to a community that, oddly, is lacking in pasta. For more than 20 years, owner Gonzalo Egozcue has been making gelato for sale at shops and restaurants all over town. His company, GelatoStar, supplies popular Italian spots like Osteria, Mia Bella, Presti’s Bakery and Vero. He and his wife Lilliana decided to branch out from the gelato game and into the full-
service restaurant business because, as he so artfully puts it, “The summer’s too short and the year is too long.” Through a clever combination of design, branding, timing and location, the couple produced a restaurant that very quickly has ingratiated itself to neighbors and the neighborhood. The bright, petite, cute-as-a-button eatery is bedecked with oversize prints of la bella vita, set against snappy mustardcolored walls. No tablecloths conceal the hardwood tables, which pair nicely with the freshly laid wood-look floors. The prominently positioned gelato and sorbet cooler lends a certain authenticity to the Italian tableau. Meals begin with a serving of warm triangles of fresh-baked dough, presented alongside that ubiquitous bowl of balsamic vinegar submerged in olive oil. That vinegar might as well be gold because there’s no way
wouldn’t hold up to the moisture. Salads, like the included house version that comes with entrees, and the Caesar ($7), are pert and perky, featuring lively greens and nonstale croutons. That Caesar boasts a luxurious dressing that smacks of garlic and anchovy, both of which are tamed by a healthy addition of nutty Parmesan cheese. Other starters include a prosciutto and melon dish and a well-executed and agreeably portioned roasted cauliflower ($7), prepared simply with grated cheese, herbs and olive oil. Molto Bene bears out the maxim that pizza, like sex, is good even when it’s bad. The dough is puffy and lax, and it lacks any defining bottom crust, but you’ll eat and enjoy it regardless. The Quattro Stagioni ($10) is like four pies in one, its rectangular chassis divided into various sections topped
MOLTO BENE ITALIAN EATERY 18401 DETROIT AVE., LAKEWOOD, 216-273-7333 EATMOLTOBENE.COM
to actually retrieve it through the protective buffer of oil. The bruschetta is less of a, well, bruschetta than it is toasted slices of good-quality bread paired with a bowl of ripe tomato pieces in basil-specked olive oil. For $8, you might expect it to arrive fully assembled as described on the menu, but my guess is that the bread
with mushrooms, sliced ham, olives and canned artichoke hearts. All of the pastas we tried were solid. A heaping bowl of penne Carbonara ($17) featured al dente noodles in an appropriately rich, decadent sauce undoubtedly enriched with egg and augmented with cheese. Nubbins of salty pancetta and numerous twists
of black pepper provide the bassline. Lasagna ($15) lovers will find few faults (or surprises) with this version, a sturdy construction of noodles, meat sauce and cheese. Even the pasta pomodoro that accompanied our chicken parm ($16) hit the right keys thanks to a bright, fresh, uncomplicated sauce. And the chicken parmesan that sat next to it was textbook: fork-tender white meat filets inside a crispy breaded shell topped with sauce and cheese. Over the course of two visits, the breakout dish turned out to be the cioppino ($21). An abundance of seafood — clams, mussels, calamari, scallops, shrimp, white fish — swim in a deeply flavorful broth with a welcome kiss of heat. Instead of the toasted Italian bread promised on the menu, my bowl was garnished with plain bread, likely because the kitchen was still emerging from the weeds. Dessert here is a no-brainer. If you’re antsy, you can order gelato to go and have it added to your dinner tab. Or, if you’re up for some caffeine, order the affogato ($5), a scoop of gelato “drowned” in espresso. Molto Bene does not have a liquor license but Simone’s Beverage is conveniently located across the street, if you know what we mean.
dtrattner@clevescene.com t@dougtrattner | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
ONE OLIVE, ONE OIL Olive Scene’s palate-pleasing olive oil By Billy Hallal WHEN I ASK TRACY CAMERA Lockhart, co-owner of the olive oil emporium Olive Scene, to describe the first time she tasted really good olive oil, she doesn’t say what I expected. “Shocking,” was her response. Lockhart is the first to say that she’s rarely at a loss for words. But her first taste of the “ultra-premium” product she now sells in her store left her speechless. “The first taste isn’t like tasting fine wine,” she says. “It’s more shocking that it can have so many flavors [that] are never really thought of.” I am at the Olive Scene in Rocky River (19132 Old Detroit Rd., 440895-9999, theolivescene.com), the oldest of the Olive Scene’s four locations, to experience that shock. Like more than half of all American households, I use olive oil on a fairly regular basis. Its oft-cited health benefits are a motivating factor, and over the years I’ve come to enjoy, or at least appreciate, its muted, slightly bitter taste. According to Lockhart, though, I likely haven’t been getting the good stuff. A 2010 study from the University of California Davis Olive Center found approximately seven out of 10 grocery store bottles did not meet the International Olive Council standards for extra virgin olive oil, despite carrying the coveted label. Government subsidies for olive growers, Lockhart explains, have led to widespread EVOO fraud in several Mediterranean nations. The product we often get on the open market, she adds, is chemically processed, adulterated with other oils, or just old. “If it doesn’t taste flavorful, what you’re tasting probably isn’t to IOC standard,” says Lockhart. Perhaps worse, consumers of substandard olive oil are missing out on most of the touted health benefits. Veronica Foods, the Olive Scene’s importer-producer, claims to deal only in the real extra virgin stuff. My goal here is to find out if the oil at the Olive Scene is really leaps and bounds above the stuff I buy from the grocery store.
So far, Lockhart has made a convincing case. A self-described “businesswoman through and through,” she has a penchant for throwing out catchy slogans like, “Think outside the salad!” She and her partners, Anne Palmer Eren and Alice Marie Wiegand, all came from ethnic Cleveland-area families with strong food traditions. “We almost called our business ‘Two Italians and a Greek,’” jokes Lockhart. The oil at the Olive Scene (as well as the equally flavorful balsamic vinegar) is kept in shiny metal tanks called fustis. Information cards list numerical ratings of the oil’s fruitiness, bitterness, pungency, and even a mass spectrometer reading (!) to measure the oil’s freshness. Lockhart coats the bottom of a shot-sized container with an oil called Koroneiki (named for the Greek olive from which it’s made) and enthusiastically walks me through the tasting process. As instructed, I take a giant whiff of the product, picking up (at her prompting) the smell of banana peel and freshly cut grass. Then, I take the shot. At first, my brain has trouble recognizing all the flavors at once. It registers a very pleasing viscosity, one with a smoothness unmatched by oil at even the finest Italian restaurants I’ve dined in. It picks up on all kinds of floral and fruit flavors going off like a rogue fireworks display on my taste buds. There’s a spiciness taking hold in the back of my throat. Lockhart encourages me to cough. It helps, she says. “That was a lighter one,” she tells me. The next one — Hojblanca (Spanish) — is considered bold, an appropriate description. The texture is like velvet, but the flavor so pungent and bitter — not in an unpleasant way — that for a few seconds after I take it, my vocal cords are rendered useless. I am, literally, speechless.
scene@clevescene.com t@clevelandscene
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
41
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
A YEAR AGO LAST WEEK, THE close-knit crew behind LBM got the keys to the future home of their Lakewood cocktail bar. They would spend the next 12 months clocking in 12-hour days to turn the blank canvas into a “Viking drinking hall” inspired by visits to Scofflaw bar in Chicago. “When I went three or four years ago, they were doing $8 cocktails,” explains owner-bartender Eric Ho. “That’s what started my train of thought. If a place like that can survive in Chicago, selling $8 cocktails, it would kill in Cleveland.” Over the past year, the concept has not changed, adds Ho. In fact, a pop-up event at Porco only confirmed the fact that they were on to something good. “It’s a cocktail bar with a kitchen — but our food is going to be awesome,” owner-bartender John Gibian chimes in. “We want the cocktails to be the main draw, but we want people to stay for some food too.” That end of the bargain falls under the purview of chef-partner Cory Miess, who’s worked over the past decade at Players, Sarita, Fahrenheit and El Carnicero. His
lineup of a dozen different snacks and small plates, priced between $5 and $15, ranges from meat and cheese boards garnished with jam, remoulade, pickles and toast to hoison-braised pork belly with spicy pickled vegetables. A seasonal Brussels sprouts preparation includes apples, leeks and brie, while a poutine is topped with cheese curds and gumbo gravy. To wash it all down are a dozen or so original concoctions, priced between $6 and $10, that will change with the seasons. For now, they go by unassuming names like Marigold, Blackberry, Fig and Asian Pear, but don’t be surprised if their replacements start sounding a bit more, uh, Norse. This “super nerdy” crew shares a deep fondness for Norse mythology, nurtured over many a whiskey-scented weekend in the woods. That lore represents itself through the eat, drink and decor. “It’s not going to be like a bro, Viking helmet, drink-out-of-a-horn kind of bar,” says Gibian. “It’s more about the gods those people believed in, the stories that they told ... it all mushroomed from that.” As for the cocktail names, he
EAT bites adds, “We want to start with some less obscure stuff and work our way into the depths of Norse mythology after introducing ourselves to the community. So they might be cool, small names, or something that we can tell the customer like an incredible story of Loki and the treasures he tricked the dwarves into making for the Aesir. Old Norse gets super weird.” The focal point of the 45-seat bar is the ceiling, a complex angled pattern of illuminated wood strips that fills the room with a warm glow. From a single felled sycamore tree emerged the lengthy bar, the woodsy backbar and a roomy table. A frilly moss wall adds an element of nature while hand-carved wooden beams and trim lend the feel of a Viking ship set sail for the open seas. “It came out better than we had even hoped,” says Ho, who is also joined by partners Vinny Salls and Merandia Adkins. “We sat here two nights ago and it just looked amazing.” Look for LBM to open early this month.
NOW OPEN: HECK’S EXPRESS IN DOWNTOWN CLEVELAND Good news for downtown workers, residents and general fans of Heck’s Cafe. Owner Fadi Daoud has just opened his quickserve version of that 40-year-old brand, Heck’s Express (515 Euclid Ave., 216-303-9494), in the heart of downtown Cleveland. That fastcasual spin-off joins the original spot in Ohio City (2927 Bridge Ave., 216-861-5464) and a second Heck’s in Avon (35514 Detroit Rd., 440-937-3200). The bright and cheery 2,500-square-foot space is on the ground floor of a seven-story parking garage that will sit beneath the new 19-floor apartment complex currently being built by Stark Enterprises. The all-day menu of breakfast, lunch and dinner options, all designed for speedy but fresh construction, ranges from healthy day-starters like açaí bowls topped with bananas and cacao nibs to savory empanadas filled with braised lamb and manchego cheese. There are soups, salads, sandwiches and burgers, of course, washed down by fresh fruit juices, signature coffee drinks and milkshakes.
NEW HOME SUITS PUPUSERIA KATARINA TO A ‘P’ The first time I enjoyed the pupusas at Pupuseria Katarina, I did so in a small, spare dining room soon after the restaurant opened in 2014. The experience and the food were wonderful, but within a year the restaurant had closed. Fortunately, fans quickly learned that the closure was merely temporary as the owners prepared to reopen in a new location. Less than a mile away, the new setting, in the former home of Mexican Village, offers up the same great pupusas, but also an expanded menu of dishes served up in a larger, more comfortable location. Naturally, Pupuseria Katarina (1409 Brookpark Rd., 216331-6624) excels at El Salvadoran pupusas, thick corn pancakes stuffed with various fillings and fried on a griddle. They offer a full slate of options, from simple cheese ($2.50) to “Pupusa Loca” ($9), which is kind of like the kitchen-sink option, stuffed with every filling on the menu. Simpler is better, in my opinion, with cheese or maybe cheese, beans and pork rising to the top. Fried to order, the pupusas arrive hot, crisp and corny. As is customary, they are served with curtido, a cool, bright and crunchy cabbage slaw, and salsa roja, a thin, mild tomato sauce. As good as those pupusas are, do try and venture beyond them when visiting. Pupuseria Katarina serves breakfast all day, and it puts to shame the typical diner-style meal. One hunger-busting version combines housemade chorizo scrambled eggs ($12), seasoned rice, refried beans, a wedge of fresh farmer’s style cheese and a pair of warm, thick tortillas. Others swap in plantains and cheesy pupusas for the rice and tortillas. The restaurant offers hearty main courses like shrimp in tomato sauce, grilled steak and onions, fried chicken and whole fried fish, all of which include rice, salad and corn tortillas. On weekends, special items like menudo (beef tripe soup), hen soup, and beef stew make appearances. Wash it all down with one of the kitchen’s refreshing housemade beverages ($2.50) made from tamarind, hibiscus, pineapple or mixed fruit. Pupuseria Katarina is open every day but Monday.
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dtrattner@clevescene.com t@dougtrattner | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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MUSIC A HAPPY ACCIDENT A London gig led to the latest effort from guitarist Little Steven Van Zandt By Matt Wardlaw Photo courtesy of BigHassle.com
WHEN LITTLE STEVEN VAN ZANDT put out his last solo album, Born Again Savage, nearly 20 years ago, he didn’t mince words in the liner notes. “We live in an insane asylum. A barbaric, merciless cesspool.” As we point out to the guitarist early in our recent phone interview, he could have easily made a sequel, considering the current political climate and state of the world. “Well, yeah, I mean, first of all, the lyrics of a lot of those solo records I did in the ’80s, they do hold up very well, unfortunately,” he says with a big laugh. “Very little has changed. But you know, more than that, I think when I did those records, it was important, I felt, to shed some light on a lot of things that were kind of hidden or not being talked about. There was nobody being political back then and I just felt it was important.” Now, he says, with the 24/7 news cycle, you don’t have to point out to everybody what’s going on. It’s pretty obvious. “I mean, I don’t have to explain Donald Trump to anybody. He explains himself every single day,” Van Zandt says. “So it was kind of liberating in a funny way, where I was able to make a record that wasn’t political, without feeling any kind of guilt. It was just like, okay, let’s make a record like everybody else makes, for a change! [Laughs] I never did that before! It was a weird feeling, to sort of have the music come first!” His sixth studio album, Soulfire, arrived earlier this year and could be categorized as a happy accident. In the fall of last year, he was wrapping up his latest round of touring work with Bruce Springsteen and the members of the E Street Band. He already had plans to go over to the U.K. to celebrate his wife’s birthday and also be on hand to mark the 80th birthday of his friend, former Rolling Stones bassist Bill Wyman. The timing of his trip was fortuitous. A friend invited him to play the London Bluesfest and, for the occasion, he put together
a new version of his longtime solo band, Disciples of Soul, the “everchanging group of misfits, rogues, and roustabouts” as he terms it. While some folks might keep things economical, Van Zandt went big and ultimately took a 15-piece band overseas, including a horn section and three backing vocalists. He’ll bring that same oversized group to the Cleveland area for his upcoming show on Friday at Hard Rock Live. “I gotta reproduce this record and it’s a big sounding record,” he says. Rehearsing a 22song setlist for the gig, he quickly
realized that it felt like something that was more than just a one-off gig. “It sounded like an album right away. I thought to myself, ‘You know, it might be time,’” he recalls now. “Even though I wasn’t ready to write a whole new album, I thought it might be a good opportunity to reintroduce myself. And kind of use it as an opportunity to not only reintroduce myself, but actually introduce myself in some ways that I’ve never done before. You know, putting some rootsy stuff on there. I never
did a blues thing before, I never did a doo-wop song before and up until this album, really, the politics always came first. It was like, ‘What do you want to say? And then what’s the appropriate music for that?’ Not that I compromised the music in the past, but it always was kind of second place. This is the first record I’ve ever done that wasn’t political, so it kind of featured me as a songwriter, as a singer, as a guitar player, as an arranger, a producer, you know. It wasn’t at all about the politics. It was a first — the first time I ever did that.” The London gig opened the door for Van Zandt to road-test the material, and the spirit and the joy of the concert carried over into the studio, where they completed work on the album in just six weeks from the opening moments to the fi nished mix. The album sessions not only gave the guitarist a chance to revisit songs that he had been involved with over the years, but also provided the chance to honor some of his favorite artists and influences. His version of Etta James’ “Blues Is My Business” captures her trademark vocal stylings and mannerisms, and he says that the process of recording songs like that one and “Down and Out In New York City,” which James Brown had recorded in the early ’70s, took him back to his own beginnings. “It was kind of full circle, back to when we started the Jukes at the Stone Pony. It was that kind of a spirit, when we started,” he says. “Before you really start to write songs, you’re in that bar band stage of your development, which is an extremely important stage of your development. Unfortunately, that’s being skipped by a lot of bands these days.” He says that period of development is a critical one, when the band is doing their favorite songs and then starting to play around with new arrangements, slowly beginning to learn the process. “You’re in that transition toward | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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LITTLE STEVEN AND THE DISCIPLES OF SOUL 8 P.M. FRIDAY, OCT. 6, HARD ROCK LIVE, 10777 NORTHFIELD RD., NORTHFIELD, 330-908-7625. TICKETS: $39.50-$49.50, HRROCKSINONORTHFIELDPARK.COM
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becoming a writer, which is going to be the next phase,â€? he explains. “But you’re setting your own standards, by playing covers and your favorite songs. You’re setting standards that you’re going to try and leap when you start to write. So it was back to that kind of attitude. In both of those cases, I came up with arrangements that I thought were unique enough and enough of a contribution that I felt justiďŹ ed putting them on a record. I was really quite happy with them and it was a lot of fun to pay tribute to those two great artists.â€? SoulďŹ re also includes two new compositions from Van Zandt, including “City Weeps,â€? a song which he ďŹ rst began more than 35 years ago while working on his debut solo album. At that time, he had a concept in mind for a record that would trace the history of rock ’n’ roll chronologically, beginning with doo-wop. His idea changed and, several decades later, he saw the opportunity to ďŹ nally rescue the unďŹ nished song. “It just kind of lay there halfďŹ nished all of these years. It was always on my mind and it was one of my favorite things,â€? he says. “I just loved that whole doowop genre, and I ďŹ nally ďŹ nished it this year for this record. I’m quite proud of that, because the simplicity of it — you know, the thing about doo-wop is the simplicity and the innocence of it — is very, very difďŹ cult to capture. Because you know, you’re only innocent once, and that was really even before my time. You know, I’m
combined styles. “I started writing a song for them, and then we went our separate ways for a minute. By the time I caught up to Richie again, he had written like 30 songs for the album,â€? he laughs. “I ďŹ gured, ‘Eh, he doesn’t really need this!’ So I ďŹ nished it for myself. I had the riff, and I had some of the lyrics and I really kind of liked it. It turned out to be quite, quite good. It’s really the only truly new song on the album. The rest were all things that I’d written for other people through the years.â€? Naturally, his work with Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes is well-represented with staple cuts like “I Don’t Want to Go Homeâ€? and “Love On the Wrong Side of Townâ€? in the track listing. Van Zandt chuckles when recalling how early Cleveland was onboard with the Jersey-bred group. “Cleveland was a major, major city for us,â€? he says. “Made even more important by crazy [radio DJ] Kid Leo playing the Jukes demos, which this crazy friend of ours, [record label owner] Steve Popovich, had leaked to Leo before we even made the album! [Laughs] They were playing the demos on WMMS.â€? Eventually, word started filtering back to Van Zandt and the members of the band that they were getting some unexpected airplay. He remains grateful to Popovich, who passed away in 2011, for the kickstart. “I think Popovich kind of did it on a whim, because he was really a creative [guy]. You know, he was the last of the really great record guys,â€? Van Zandt says. “He was one of the real old-school promotions
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talking about the ’50s. So I was able to get my head back into that more innocent time and ďŹ nish the song and I’m really quite happy with that.â€? “I Saw the Light,â€? the other new song on the album, is one that Van Zandt started writing for Richie Sambora, with the thought that the former Bon Jovi guitarist might be able to use the track for RSO, the new band he was working on with his wife, fellow guitarist and vocalist Orianthi. He heard the demos that they had been recording and really loved their
guys and I think he got a bigger reaction than he was expecting; and the next thing I know, he was rushing us into the studio, saying, ‘We need to do an album, like right now. You’re already getting airplay on it!’ [Laughs] You know, before it’s recorded! I think it was just Popovich doing his wild man thing. God bless him, man. He was the greatest. The last of his kind. I miss him every single day.�
scene@clevescene.com t@clevelandscene
308 EUCLID AVE. CLEVELAND, OH 44114 216.523.BLUE Complete listing at houseofblues.com/cleveland
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BIG HEAD TODD & THE MONSTERS
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JAN. 23 ON SALE FRI. 10AM
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GREENSKY BLUEGRASS
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Dark Star Orchestra Here Come The Mummies w/ Sparky B TWRP Cambridge Room Misterwives w/ Smallpools, Vinyl Theatre Lil Peep w/ Goth Boy Clique, Bexey Cambridge Room The Front Bottoms w/ Basement, Bad Bad Hats Paint The Skull - A Modern Folk Art Experience Brujeria w/ Powerflo, Pinata Protest Cambridge Room Our Lady Peace w/ SMSHING HRTS The Highway Finds w/ High Valley, Ashley McBryde, Adam Doleac Cambridge Room
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Buy tickets at HOUSEOFBLUES.COM/CLEVELAND Order By Phone: 800.745.3000 • House of Blues Box Office
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
MUSIC RHYTHMIC WRITING Local indie rockers the Lighthouse and the Whaler get personal on their new EP By Jeff Niesel TWO YEARS AGO, LOCAL INDIE rockers the Lighthouse and the Whaler received a big boost when their studio release, Mont Royal, drew national attention. The band headed north of the border to Montreal to record the album with Marcus Paquin (The National, Arcade Fire). They worked at his studio in Montreal for five weeks in the dead of winter when it was “freezing.” Songs such as “Glory” feature bellowing vocals, while it sounds like a veritable choir backs singer Michael LoPresti on the tune. “Senses” features a slew of synthesizers, making it sound like an homage to the synth-pop of the ’80s, and “We Aren’t Who We Thought We Are” includes soaring strings as LoPresti nearly adopts a falsetto to sing about “our last chance.” In the wake of that album’s release, the band toured with indie acts such as Ra Ra Riot, Run River North and Surfer Blood. “We got to play some really great shows and do our own headlining tour right after Mont Royal came out,” says LoPresti in a recent phone interview. The band performs at 8 p.m. on Thursday at the Grog Shop, where it begins a four-week tour in support of its terrific new EP, Paths. “They were some of the biggest shows we ever played. It’s been fun to see people from other cities grasping it and that’s encouraging. That was a highlight, for sure. We toured with Surfer Blood, and it was great to get know them. That was a really great tour. We toured on the Run River North release tour. That was really fun too. Those were some great shows. We have a great connection with those guys.” The band also had songs on the CW show Frequency and on Fox’s Brooklyn Nine-Nine. The album’s first single, “I Want to Feel Alive,” received some serious traction thanks to an appearance by Holland Roden of MTV’s Teen Wolf. “Holland talked about us on social media, and we met her in
Photo courtesy of ReeBee, Inc.
THE LIGHTHOUSE AND THE WHALER, POLARS, YOUNG FOLK 8:30 P.M. THURSDAY, OCT. 5, GROG SHOP, 2785 EUCLID HEIGHTS BLVD., CLEVELAND HEIGHTS, 216-321-5588. TICKETS: $10 ADV, $12 DOS, GROGSHOP.GS
L.A.,” says LoPresti when asked about the music video. “She was stoked on the idea. “We had an idea, and we laid it out, and the director tweaked it. She did a fantastic job. I was very impressed with the way she commanded the camera. I’m not an actor of any kind, so it was cool to see that in real life. That was awesome to see someone who has the talent to do that.” About a year ago, LoPresti began to put some songs together for Paths. The title track was one of the first tunes he penned. “There’s a rhythm to the song, which is a combination of drums and claps,” he explains. “I came up with that rhythm, and it’s the foundation for the whole song. We wanted to return to a rhythmic songwriting style. Royal is more vibe-y. We wanted to return to a
more intense style of songwriting. I demo-ed it and brought it to the guys and we worked on the songs for the next month or two before we went into the studio here in Cleveland and finalized everything. The guys came in and solidified it. They made the songs into Lighthouse songs. It was really collaborative.” The songs explore a theme of “battling for relevancy,” as LoPresti puts it. “I think on a personal level, there’s that,” says LoPresti. “I feel like it’s a struggle to be in a band and people don’t fully see that. They look at it from the outside. There’s a lot of struggle, especially now, and it’s hard to be relevant in any way. It’s hard to rise above that noise as a band. Basically, it is just difficult to matter. There’s a song called ‘We Can Make It.’ It’s about
how we can keep pushing forward. Outside of that, I think of the EP as a way to connect with your own journey or path or wherever you’re at.” The title track is incredibly up-beat as the echoing vocals, jangly guitars and rattling drums combine to create an exuberant energy. LoPresti effectively adopts a falsetto for most of the tune. “When we were in the studio and recording the vocals and [producer] Jim [Stewart] had put this microphone in the main lobby area,” says LoPresti. “It’s this huge echoey room. We just sang the chorus over and over again until we got this massive resonating, shouting. We sang it and shouted it and varied our voices in different takes. We got this complex yet large sounding moment in those choruses. There’s times when we’re so frustrated with what we’re doing that we just want to scream or pull our hair out. That’s sort of what we were going for. There’s frustration, but in that frustration there’s growth and beauty inside of that. The chorus is supposed to capture that emotion that people have when they’re pursuing something that’s difficult.” It might be harder than ever to keep a band together now that record sales have slumped and streaming doesn’t provide much in terms of revenue, yet the Lighthouse and the Whaler, despite several lineup changes over the years, has been going strong for close to a decade now. That significance isn’t lost on LoPresti. “I think we have one more year before it’s 10 years,” he says. “Depending on where we’re at the end of next year, we will mark that. We want to do something to acknowledge that. It’s difficult to be in the music industry, and we’ve been blessed that people continue to support our music through all these years.”
jniesel@clevescene.com t@jniesel | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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MUSIC STILL SEARCHING FOR THE ‘GREATEST SONG’ Veteran singer-songwriter Paul Weller continues to look forward PAUL WELLER IS A TRAILBLAZING anomaly in a lot of ways. As the former frontman of two largely influential British bands, the Jam and the Style Council, he’s played everything from angry punk rock and classic British pop to soul, funk, jazz and R&B. Now, as a successful solo musician, Weller, nearly 60, still makes records, tours and experiments with all sorts of genres of music, proving that he’s never completely satisfied with his extensive back catalog, and he’s not interested in looking back or reforming either of his previous bands just for old times’ sake. Perhaps the only thing that’s been a constant in his career is association with British mod subculture; he had his own mod fashion line called Real Stars Are Rare, and is such a figurehead for the subculture that he earned a nickname — the Modfather. This year, Weller released A Kind Revolution, his 25th studio album (his 13th solo album), and he’ll perform songs from it on Sunday at House of Blues. The album is quite different from his previous two albums; it includes more piano ballads and fewer guitar-centered tracks. It’s largely influenced by jazz, funk and soul. Apart from the album’s first two tracks, it has a fairly slow tempo. The album also includes several high-profile guest spots. The soulful lead track “Woo Se Mama” includes vocals from PP Arnold and Madeleine Bell; the funky “One Tear” features vocals from Boy George; and the jazz track, “She Moves with the Fayre,” features Robert Wyatt on trumpet. Josh McClorey from the Strypes plays guitar on three tracks. “A lot of times, it’s dictated by the songs, and it’s never really conscious,” says Weller in a recent phone interview when asked about the album’s new direction. “It’s just the way the songs come out. With ‘Long Long Road’ and ‘The Cranes Are Back,’ I just sat down on the piano and wrote those songs.” The title, A Kind Revolution, implies a few different lyrical themes. “I just thought it was a good title for the record and a good title for
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Photo by Tom Beard
By Elizabeth Manno
PAUL WELLER, LUCY ROSE 7 P.M. SUNDAY, OCT. 8, HOUSE OF BLUES, 308 EUCLID AVE., 216-523-2583. TICKETS: $35-$41.15, HOUSEOFBLUES.COM
the times as well,” says Weller. “So the album’s not in any way thematic or a cohesive statement, but I think the intention was trying to put some love in there and kindness and compassion and all those things, so maybe that went into the music, I would hope anyway.” He’s also not interested in slowing down any time soon as he confesses that he’s still just as excited by the musical process as he was when he was younger. “I just loving making music, and I love seeing a track come together from a little tiny idea and all of a sudden, into the night, you’ve got a tune going on,” he says. “I’m always fascinated by that. I’m also always still looking to see whether or not I can write my greatest song, which is
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
probably an impossibility. I suppose there’s still that competitive thing within myself.” As the author of dozens, possibly hundreds, of songs since he first began writing, it’s astonishing that he is still able to expand into new territory. However, Weller admits it’s not always easy. “There’s times when I play a certain chord sequence, which I think, ‘Wow that’s really great and different,’ and then I realize I used the same thing 10 years ago, 20 years ago, 30 years ago, or whatever,” he says. “There’s things that I think just come back to you as a writer.” Although Weller still loves the music he fell in love with while growing up in the ’60s, he’s very much in the know when it comes to
new music. He praises his recent U.K. tour support, young Brighton psych rockers White Room, and his upcoming U.S. tour support, British folk singer-songwriter Lucy Rose. “If I hear ‘Waterloo Sunset’ or ‘Strawberry Fields’ or ‘Reach Out (I’ll Be There)’ or whatever it may be, those are the things that turned me on to music in the first place, so they’re always going to be special to me. But outside of that, if I had like a playlist or something, I would probably have just as many new tunes that I’ve heard this year alongside all the things that I’ve always held to be great,” he says. “There’s still great music coming out.” One reason why he’s not interested in reforming the Jam or the Style Council, despite the high demand from fans, is that he thinks the recent rise in musical nostalgia hurts new bands that are trying to break through. “Rock ’n’ roll or rock or pop or whatever you want to call it, back in the day, it was always looking forward. And I don’t know when that changed or why that changed, but it definitely has changed,” he says. “I think there’s also so much young talent in general out there, and if you look at the festival bills, in England anyway, they’re only ever headlined by people who just got back together and newer bands are way, way down on the list.” This year marks the 40th anniversary of In the City, Weller’s first album with the Jam. After all the decades of commercial and critical success, one might think Weller would get tired of making music or just want to take a break. But he’s still writing and creating all the time. So, what’s his secret to success and longevity as a musician? “I’m not blase or cynical about any of it, and I think that makes a difference,” he says. “If you still love that same thing, it changes everything.”
scene@clevescene.com t@clevelandscene
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
THE SPAZMATICS
LIVEWIRE
all the live music you should see this week Photo by Lucas Davis
WED
10/04
Against Me!/Bleached/The Dirty Nil: Plenty of punk bands have succeeded purely because they bring the noise. Against Me! does that and then some. Much like the Ramones and the Clash, the band has left its mark because of the great songs it writes. Three years ago at House of Blues, the group kicked off the Alternative Press Music Awards with an invigorating show that really got the mosh pit going. We still consider the band’s driving tune, “I Was a Teenage Anarchist,” to be one of the great punk anthems of all time. In the wake of opening some dates for Green Day, the band has just announced a tour in support of its new studio album, the highly personal Shape Shift With Me. Band founder Laura Jane Grace wrote the songs on the album, a loose concept album about traveling the world, from what she calls a “trans perspective.” Expect tonight’s concert to be an inspiring affair. (Jeff Niesel) 7 p.m., $20-$30. House of Blues. KMFDM: When band leader Sascha Konietzko launched the industrial rock outfit KMFDM (originally Kein Mehrheit Für Die Mitleid, which loosely translates as “no pity for the majority”) in Hamburg in 1984, he drew from protoindustrial acts such as Einstürzende Neubauten, SPK and Throbbing Gristle. KMFDM borrowed from a few different genres. The band got a boost when it toured the States with the Ministry in 1989, but then broke up for a short spell in the late ’90s and early 2000s. It reconvened a few years back and has been going strong ever since. Its latest effort, Hell Yeah, represents another remarkable chapter in the band’s storied career. The disc commences with the infectious title track, a tune driven by a funky bass riff and percolating synths (think a cross between Pet Shop Boys and Nine Inch Nails) and then veers into alternately heavy and dance floor friendly tunes, all of which should translate well live. (Niesel) 7 p.m., $25 ADV, $29 DOS. Agora Ballroom. 10 X 3 Singer Songwriter Showcase hosted by Brent Kirby: 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. The Appleseed Collective/The Elephants: 8:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Beachland Tavern.
Issues: 8 p.m., $12 ADV, $14 DOS. Mahall’s 20 Lanes.
Alice Glass brings her first-ever solo tour to House of Blues. See: Saturday.
FRI
Bad Boys of Blues: 9 p.m., free. Happy Dog. Bluewater Kings Band: 8 p.m., free. Brothers Lounge. Brandon Coleman Quartet featuring Noah Preminger: 7 p.m., $10. Nighttown. Joshua Davis/Ken Yates: 7:30 p.m., $15 ADV, $18 DOS. Music Box Supper Club. Reggae Night on Coventry: 10 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Grog Shop. Eric Seddon’s Hot Club Presents A Tribute To Jimmie Noone: 7 p.m., $12. Bop Stop. Ugly Sun: 9 p.m., $5. Now That’s Class.
THU
10/05
Dark Star Orchestra: There are a lot of Grateful Dead tributes out there — so many in Northeast Ohio alone! — but Dark Star Orchestra gets audiences closest to the main nerve of the band’s legacy. Each show draws on an actual Dead show from the past — that night’s unique setlist — and sort of replicates it for the present. (The jamming, of course, diverges from the original show, giving audiences new landscapes of improvisation to enjoy.) And, yeah, DSO can jam. They bring a fun and nostalgic show, a flashback to easier living
and sepia-tinged wild nights. “One amazing thing about the Dead is the fact that they have these songs: These are highly evolved narratives that tell these incredible stories,” keyboardist Rob Barraco told us in 2015. “Without that, they never would have stuck around like this. It’s a body of work that will be around forever.” The band was recently taking requests for individual Dead shows on their Facebook page for this Cleveland show; so maybe your show will get picked! (Eric Sandy) 7 p.m., $26$36. House of Blues. Brain Bagz/Trophy Knife/Kill the Hippies: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. Popa Chubby (in the Supper Club): 7:30 p.m., $15 ADV, $18 DOS. Music Box Supper Club. Cortex: 8 p.m., $10. Bop Stop. Chris Hatton’s Musical Circus (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Chris Hillman, Herb Pedersen and John Jorgensen: 8 p.m., $35. The Kent Stage. Jam Night with the Bad Boys of Blues: 9 p.m., free. Brothers Lounge. The Lighthouse and the Whaler/ Polars/Young Folk: 8:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Grog Shop. Vanessa Rubin/Don Braden Organ Quintet: 8 p.m., $30. Nighttown. Together PANGEA/Tall Juan/Daddy
10/06
Brother Ali/Sa-Roc/Last Word/Sol Messiahh: Two of Brother Ali’s most well-known songs embody the dichotomy of the rapper’s writing. On one hand, you’ve got “Forest Whitiker,” which dishes a “beauty is on the inside, not the outside” narrative, and then you’ve got “Uncle Sam Goddamn,” which sinks its claws into a country built on injustice and inequality and, naturally, hypocrisy. In both forms, Ali flashes a street-pastor vocal style and a knack for acrobatic social criticism. This is conscious hip-hop, embodying the slick and savvy Rhymesayers ethos. (Sandy) 8 p.m., $15 ADV, $18 DOS. Agora Ballroom. Tokimonsta/Kingdom/Kingjet/ Kami: When Jennifer Lee, the L.A.based electronic indie artist who tours and records as Tokimonsta, first signed to Brainfeeder, the label run by forward-thinking electronic artist Flying Lotus, she didn’t think it was any big deal. After all, Flying Lotus simply contacted her via iChat and informally added her to his roster. Lee’s resulting 2010 debut album Midnight Menu, captures the sound of the West Coast beat scene and represents the distillation of her various influences. Lee, who grew up studying piano, draws from both hip-hop and electronica and cites acts such as Wu-Tang Clan and DJ Shadow as influences. Her latest effort, Lune Rouge, is another eclectic affair. The undulating “We Love” features percolating synths and hiccuping vocals, making it sound a bit like it could be a Tegan and Sara song. With some help from the song’s guest vocalist, Malaysian singer-songwriter Yuna, the single “Don’t Call Me” shows how easily Lee can navigate the pop world. Lee isn’t touring with a band, but tonight’s show should feature some cool visuals and will still be an engaging event. (Niesel) 8 p.m., $15 ADV, $18 DOS. Beachland Ballroom. Armstrong Bearcat: 9:30 p.m., $5. Brothers Lounge. The Dreemers/See Creatures/DJ Andrew Novak: 9 p.m., $10. Musica. Empower U Fundraiser with the Village Bicycle/Bitchseat/Sarah Arafat: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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LIVEWIRE Fastball: 8 p.m., $25. The Kent Stage. The Front Porch (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Here Come the Mummies: 7:30 p.m., $23-$32. House of Blues. In Training 3-Year Anniversary with Doc Sleep/Luz/Father of Two/ Moon Baby: 9 p.m., $10. Now That’s Class. Kristine Jackson, Rachel Brown & Becky Boyd (in the Supper Club): 8 p.m., $18 ADV, $20 DOS. Music Box Supper Club. Lez Zeppelin: 8 p.m. Music Box Supper Club. Little Steven & the Disciples of Soul: 8 p.m. Hard Rock Rocksino Northfield Park. Chuck Mead & His Grassy Knoll Boys/Crash Coffin and the Pallbearers: 8:30 p.m., $15. Beachland Tavern. Morgan Mecaskey & Nate Jones: 8:30 p.m., $10. Nighttown. Now, Now/Dem Yuut: 8:30 p.m., $12 ADV, $14 DOS. Grog Shop. Red Shoe Company: 8 p.m., $12. Bop Stop. Moss Stanley: 10:30 p.m., free. Nighttown. Who Hit Me/Ryan Brown and his Friends: 8:30 p.m., $5. The Euclid Tavern.
SAT
10/07
Alice Glass: Prior to her first solo EP’s surprise release in August, Alice Glass told Pitchfork that her new electronic music sounds “like being eaten by fire ants,” and “like being slowly consumed by a snake.” And the former Crystal Castles vocalist/songwriter’s assessment isn’t entirely off base; you’ll feel like your eardrums are deteriorating after listening to this. Her eponymous EP is full of pop-punkelectronic wildness. It roars and slows and screeches and quickens. Glass’ nails-on-chalkboard upperrange vocals are hard to handle through many of the tunes, but the single “Without Love” offers a more measured and worthy introduction to her work. (Laura Morrison) 8 p.m., $15. House of Blues. Kid Cudi: Despite recent struggles with depression and suicidal urges that forced him to check into rehab, rapper Kid Cudi, a Cleveland native, managed to release a new studio album, Passion, Pain and Demon Slayin’, at the end of last year. The album’s swinging single “Surfin’,” a tune that features horns
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
and a reggae beat, clocked over 6 million Spotify streams and 4.5 million YouTube/VEVO views upon its initial release. (Niesel) 9 p.m., $26.50. Wolstein Center. All That Remains/The Analogia/End in Echoes/Assault: 6:30 p.m., $16 ADV, $19 DOS. Agora Ballroom. Tim Barry/John Leonard/Roger Harvey: 8 p.m., $12 ADV, $15 DOS. Grog Shop. Dave Berkman/Tim Armacost Quartet: 8 p.m., $20. Bop Stop. The Clarks/Erica Blinn: 8 p.m., $20. Musica. Fifty Amp Fuse: 9:30 p.m., $10. Brothers Lounge. Mike Mains with Brett Newski/ The Dream Masons: 8:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Beachland Tavern. The Modern Electric/Tristen/ Samfox: 9 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Beachland Ballroom. Rash/Perverts Again/Roobydocks (in Club Atlantis): 9 p.m., $5. Now That’s Class. The Resurrection Of Stevie Ray Vaughn Starring Billy Evanochko: 8 p.m. Akron Civic Theatre. Studio-A-Rama Afterparty with Dennyoke: 9 p.m., free. The Euclid Tavern. Antoinette Tredanary: 8:30 p.m., $10. Nighttown. Jeff Varga (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Ryley Walker: 8:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Jackie Warren: 10:30 p.m., free. Nighttown.
SUN
10/08
Clean House Benefit with Outlaws I & I/Jim & Beth Miller/Daddy Longleg’s Homegrown Revival/ Jim Tiane/Dave Smeltz Trio Plus One/Vernon Jones Blues Cartel: 7 p.m., $15. Beachland Ballroom. Cloakroom: 7 p.m., $10 ADV, $12 DOS. Mahall’s 20 Lanes. Fly Tye Album Release: 8:30 p.m., $10 ADV, $15 DOS. Grog Shop. Golden Grass/Burnin’ Loins/Salem’s Eye: 9 p.m., $5. Happy Dog. MercyMe: 7 p.m., $29-$69. State Theatre. Mike Petrone (in the Wine Bar): 5:30 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Joey Nix and His Big Band: 4 p.m., free. Now That’s Class. Rik and the Pigs/Patsy/The Cowboy/ Street Gurgler: 9 p.m., $8. Now That’s Class. Scott Routenberg Trio: 7 p.m., $12. Bop Stop. Shovels & Rope: 7:30 p.m., $28 ADV, $32 DOS. Music Box Supper Club. Paul Weller: 7 p.m., $35-$49. House of Blues.
LIVEWIRE Susan Werner (in the Supper Club): 7:30 p.m., $25 ADV, $28 DOS. Music Box Supper Club.
MON
10/09
Eric Anderson: 7 p.m., $20. Nighttown. Blind Pilot/Tall Heights: 8 p.m., $20 ADV, $22 DOS. Beachland Ballroom. Tommy Castro and the Painkillers: 8 p.m., $25. The Kent Stage. Cleveland Blues Society Jam Night! (in the Supper Club): 7:30 p.m., free. Music Box Supper Club. Grassroots Bluegrass Jam: 7:30 p.m., free. The Euclid Tavern. Shit Show Karaoke: 10 p.m. B-Side Liquor Lounge & Arcade. Skatch Anderssen Orchestra: 8 p.m., $7. Brothers Lounge. TWRP/Planet Booty: 7 p.m., $12. House of Blues. Velvet Voyage (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge.
TUE
Live Music Daily
10/10
The New Pornographers/Born Ruffians: Over the course of the six albums the band has released over the past 20 years, the group has mined assorted influences. So when it came time for the veteran band to write tunes for its latest effort, Whiteout Conditions, singerguitarist Carl Newman has said he wanted to head in a different direction. The herky jerky, synthheavy “Play Money,” which features Neko Case, a band member who’s also had a successful solo career, as lead singer, was one of the first songs he wrote. The songs all have a brisk pace to them, which should make tonight’s show a particularly exuberant affair. (Niesel) 8 p.m., $30. Beachland Ballroom. Bloodbags/Rubber Mate/Pig Flayer: 9 p.m., $5. Now That’s Class. Paul Ferguson/Greg Abate Quintet: 7 p.m., $10. Nighttown. Gov’t Mule: 6:30 p.m., $32.50 ADV, $38 DOS. The Agora Theatre. Our Great Country Night with Mary Taylor Brooks (in the Wine Bar): 8 p.m. Brothers Lounge. Zeke/Against the Grain/Gluttons: 8:30 p.m., $15. Grog Shop.
scene@clevescene.com t@clevelandscene
CLEVELAND
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Located at Flats East Bank 1150 Front Ave. • Cleveland, OH 44113
WWW.MARGARITAVILLECLEVELAND.COM • (216) 615.8855 | clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
55
Photo by Nate Bucher
GREAT FOOD ]h[Wj cki_Y Š ]h[Wj j_c[i
THIS Friday, Oct. 6
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Oct 6 ...... Strangers From the Streets Oct 13 .................... Back Street Blues Oct 20..............................Shady Drive Oct 27 ......................................Cruisin’ Oct 28............HALLOWEEN PARTY!
Friday, Oct. 20
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RICK DERRINGER special guest
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RICHARD ELLIOTT Friday, Nov. 24
Saturday, Nov. 25
Vegas After Dark Christmas Show DOM & RUSS
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532 W. MARKET ST. | AKRON, OH | 330-376-7171
56
By Jeff Niesel MEET THE BAND: Ben Patrick (guitar, vocals), Rob Keith (bass, vocals), Natalie Grieshammer (drums, vocals)
Music by UNDER SUSPENSION
Saturday, Nov. 11
Annual Holiday Stomp THE WALKING CLAMPETTS
THE DREEMERS
Great music, food and drink BOOK YOUR SPECIAL EVENTS WITH US.
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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IN THE BEGINNING: The group came together in Akron in 2015. Keith and Patrick went to high school together, and Grieshammer and Keith are distant cousins. “We met through the art and music scene,â€? says Patrick, who had previously played in another band with Keith. “We still had studio space, and that’s how Dreemers formed. We tricked Natalie into playing drums. I gave her a lesson and she learned how to play through that. We forced her into the band and it went really well.â€? Patrick inherited his dad’s records and absorbed a good dose of retro rock. “He has the classics and the rare ďŹ nds,â€? he says. “I used to download a crap ton of music. We love early jazz and rock and rap. We love all kinds of music.â€? SOULFUL SURF: The band’s full-length debut, Beach Mode, features a range of music. It includes driving blues, surf pop and soulful doo-wop. The group went to the newly formed Akron Recording Company, which was founded by the Dreemers and Nate Bucher of See Creatures, to record the album. The studio is situated near old factories in Akron’s East End neighborhood. “We have a great space for making analog recordings,â€? says Patrick. “There are four or ďŹ ve musicians involved and we’ve been doing shows there. We have a nice live room and want to do releases through the studio.â€? San Francisco-based artist Andrew Pitrone, who’s originally from Cleveland, did the artwork.
WHY YOU SHOULD HEAR THEM: “Rock and Roll Deathwish,â€? the ďŹ rst track on Beach Mode, begins with a series of screams before the surf-y guitars, old-school organ riffs and B-52s-like vocals kick in. “Everybody’s doing it,â€? goes the refrain, which the band repeats over and over. “Hand in the Mirrorâ€? features soulful vocals and a plodding drumbeat that makes it sound like it came from the ’60s. “Feelin’ Fineâ€? includes a gospel intro, but “Better Than Thatâ€? ditches the gimmickry and comes off as a great garage rock tune. “The elements of the songs just come from our inuences,â€? says Patrick. “We will have a punkier song or a bluesier song and then throw some kind of riff at the end, and it will go into doo-wop or some other genre. We just jam a lot and when we do that we blend styles together. Robert writes the hooks. I often write the verses and he provides the choruses, and I think that’s where the merging of the styles comes from.â€? WHERE YOU CAN HEAR THEM: thedreemers.bandcamp.com WHERE YOU CAN SEE THEM: The Dreemers perform with See Creatures and DJ Andrew Novak at 8:30 p.m. on Friday, Oct. 6, at Musica in Akron, and at 2 p.m. on Saturday, Oct. 7, outside of MOCA Cleveland in University Circle’s Uptown District as part of Studio-A-Rama.
jniesel@clevescene.com t@jniesel
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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Photo by Greg Dohler
C-NOTES
Indie rockers Tears of Silver will perform in a “handpicked alternative space.”
KentStage The
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Chris Hillman, Herb Pedersen & John Jorgenson Thu., Oct. 5
Fastball Fri., Oct. 6
And The Painkillers Mon., Oct. 9
An Evening with
Todd Snider
Ekoostik Hookah
Leftover Salmon Tues., Oct. 17
The Mersey Beatles Sat., Oct. 21
Thu., Oct. 19
Shawn Colvin & Her Band
A Few Small Repairs 20th Anniversary Tour
Sun., Oct.29
JUST ANNOUNCED An Evening with
Tommy Castro
Fri., Oct. 20
Béla Fleck & Abigail Washburn Thu., Nov. 2
Todd Rundgren
Herb Alpert & Lani Hall
Tuesday Dec. 5
Wed., Nov. 8 ALL SHOWS AT THE KENT STAGE UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED Tickets available at www.kentstage.org or 877-987-6487 GMK [w cw i {{ © a{ B e~ JJHJF
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
A SECRET SHOW Indie rockers Tears of Silver bring their pop-up tour to town By Jeff Niesel VETERAN MUSICIANS WHO ALL play in other indie rock acts and have left a significant legacy, Ken Stringfellow (Posies), Jesse Chandler (Midlake, Mercury Rev), Jonathan Donahue (Mercury Rev) and Grasshopper (Grasshopper) have come together to form Tears of Silver. The band is currently on a pop-up tour that includes a Cleveland stop this Saturday, Oct. 7. At each show, the group will play a set that includes tracks from each of the members’ respective acts as well as a handful of cover tunes. The performances will take place in “handpicked alternative spaces” chosen by the band. The locations will be kept secret; only the dates and cities have been announced, and the actual venues will be announced to the ticket holders only, 48 hours before the show. The dates will mark the first time Mercury Rev’s music has been performed in many parts of the States for nearly a decade. Tickets are on sale now at tearsofsilver.space.
BEACHLAND TO HOST BENEFIT CONCERT FOR LOCAL NAVY RESERVES VET For the past three years, Navy Reserves veteran Shay Kelleher has been unable to walk, drive or work due to a condition known as chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy, an autoimmune,
neurological disorder similar to MS. Local musicians have rallied to her assistance, and the Beachland Ballroom will host a special benefit from 10:30 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. on Sunday to help Kelleher, whose mother was in marketing and promotion for MCA and WEA Records and whose father plays with several local bands, raise money for a hematopoietic stem cell transplant (HSCT). The cost of the procedure is $60,000. Insurance doesn’t cover the expense. Acts such as Snake Rock and Ally, Exit, Bi-Polar Express, Blue Stone Union and the Rockin’ Ravers with guest star, former Raspberries’ drummer Jim Bonfanti, will perform. The Ghoul will be on hand, and local rock photographer Janet Macoska will sponsor a “sale” table featuring her photos and books. Photos from George Shuba, Maureen Gray and Joe Kleon will be for sale as well. A silent auction will feature a number of items, including a Bernie Kosar signed jersey, an Iman Shumpert signed basketball shoe, the original “Born Loser” artwork from artist Chip Samson, and a Christmas package featuring two tickets to Trans-Siberian Orchestra, 5 DVDs, Twizzlers and eight Christmas stockings.
jniesel@clevescene.com t@jniesel
| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
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| clevescene.com | October 4 - 10, 2017
SAVAGE LOVE ’BATE AND SNITCH by Dan Savage Dear Dan, I’m a 22-year-old straight male dating a 23-year-old woman. This is by far the most sexual relationship I’ve been in, which is great, except one part is freaking me out: I recently “caught” my girlfriend masturbating with her roommate’s panties. (She knew I was coming over and wanted me to catch her.) It turns out she has a habit of sneaking her roommate’s worn underwear, masturbating while smelling them (or putting them in her mouth), and then sneaking them back into her roommate’s laundry basket. She has also used her roommate’s vibrator and dry-humped her pillow to orgasm. I got turned on hearing about all this, and she jerked me off with her roommate’s panties. My girlfriend says she gets turned on being “naughty” and most of her fantasies involve being her roommate’s sex slave, me fucking the roommate while my GF is tied up, etc. Our sex life now revolves around the roommate — my GF has stolen a few more pairs of panties and even worn them while I fucked her, and her dirty talk is now almost entirely about her roommate. This turns me on, so I don’t really want it to stop, but my questions are: (1) Is this bad? (2) Is this normal? We’re conditioned to believe women are less kinky and less sexual than men, and I don’t want to buy into that. My girlfriend says she isn’t “that weird.” I don’t know what to think. — There’s No Acronym For This 1. It’s bad. 2. When it comes to human sexuality, TNAFT, variance is the norm. Which means freakiness/ naughtiness/kinkiness is normal — science backs me up on this — and, yes, lots of women have high libidos and lots are kinky. Your email came sandwiched between a question from a woman who needs sex daily (and foolishly married a man with a very low libido) and a question from a woman who is into BDSM (and wisely held out for a GGG guy who’s getting better at bondage but can’t bring himself to inflict the erotic/consensual pain she craves). But “variance is the norm” doesn’t get your girlfriend off the hook — or you, TNAFT. You and your girlfriend are both violating this poor woman’s privacy, potentially her health (unless your girlfriend is sterilizing her
roommate’s vibrator after using it), and — perhaps most importantly — her trust. Honoring each other’s privacy and showing mutual respect for each other’s belongings are the social norms that make it possible for unrelated/unfucking adults to share a living space. We trust our roommates not to steal money out of our purses, eat our peanut butter, use our toothbrushes, etc. And even if your roommate never catches you, it’s still not okay to use their fucking toothbrush. It should go without saying that we trust our roommates not to shove our dirty panties into their mouths, use our sex toys, hump our pillows, etc. We can’t control who fantasizes about us, but we have an absolute right to control who handles our dirty underpants. (My God, think of all the times you’ve run out of clean underwear and fished a dirty pair out of the laundry and worn them a second time!) Your girlfriend should make an honest, respectful, naughty pass at her roommate. And who knows? Maybe her roommate is just as pervy as you two are and would jump at the chance to have a sex slave and full use of her roommate/sex slave’s boyfriend in exchange for a few dirty panties. Or maybe she’d like to move.
Dear Dan, I’m a six-months-pregnant woman in a wonderful relationship. My sex drive has skyrocketed, and I get uncomfortably horny at random times. I work at a preschool and have gone into the one-person locked bathroom during my break for a quick rubout. Is this wrong? It takes me one minute to come and I’m totally silent. But I’m at a preschool and there are little kids on the other side of that door. Thoughts? — Knocked Up And Horny You’re doing nothing wrong — and pretty soon you’ll be having sex in your home while your kid sleeps or plays on the other side of your bedroom door, KUAH, so you might as well get some practice in. And if you don’t want a kid walking in on you at home, either (and you definitely don’t), put a lock on your bedroom door.
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