The notso-quiet joy of Book Club
Olivia Campbell, Head of Business Development, Dukes Tutoring discusses the pleasures of reading with friends and shares personal recommendations
Reading has always been a solitary act, but it has never existed in isolation. Stories travel into conversation, disagreement, recognition. Even when read alone, a book asks something of us: a thought we hold onto, a line we reread, a moment we return to later. Reading together gives those responses somewhere to go, extending the life of a book beyond its pages and turning it into something shared. The act of sharing stories is nothing new.
The term Book Club, however, appears to have originated in the 18th century, when early clubs were as much social gatherings as literary ones, often meeting in taverns over ample food, drink and conviviality. I am lucky to be a part of a hugely convivial group of readers — and I’d like to invite you in.
To be invited in properly, you must understand the dynamic of us. We formed a few years ago through a mutual friend and a shared love of rosé wine. Jacqui is
the buzzy, vivacious mutual friend, who often runs out of time to read the book and favours listening to the audiobook on 1.7x speed as she races to the dinner. Fiona is the role model member who has never not read a book, arrives with notes and highlighted sections to discuss and is genuinely interested to learn from everyone. Harriet is an actress and painter who has many multiple creative projects at once and always starts the book last minute, often the week of Book Club. Maddie, kind and curious, tends to analyse the characters, their relationship and their context to really draw on her experience and enjoyment of the book. We have two who have left London, but still participate — Natalie, organised and diligent, is quick-witted and loves a juicy plot, and finally Sammy, sharp and nuanced, doesn’t speak until the end and then offers a completely new angle we hadn’t considered. I’m the ex-schoolteacher — generally the bossy one who makes sure we’re on track and following the rules. When talking about Book Club, we’re often asked the question, ‘ Do you even talk about books or do you just drink wine and gossip?’ My response — not quite. Although yes, the wine and gossip are a large part of our love for each other, books too play a central role in our monthly meetings. So, against the clichés of Fight Club, you have insight into the rules of our Book Club:
Rule 1
We have an orderly rota. When it’s your month to choose the book, you host dinner at your house.
Rule 2
No talking about the book until you sit down for dinner. No chatting about it in the lead up, no secret WhatsApp messages behind the group chat’s back, and absolutely no talking about it until everyone has arrived. The drinks and nibbles at the start are for catching up (and yes, some gossiping).
Rule 3
Some sense of order is adhered to once the discussion begins. The host gives their summary, what they liked and didn’t, what character was interesting and ‘wasn’t that one so frustrating!’ From here, we all get so enthusiastic, any order is thrown out the window.
Rule 4
To finish, a mark must be given by each person, and absolutely no one is allowed to award a middle of the road 7/10.
Rule 5
Before the close of the night, the next book is announced. We tend to choose books mostly by female authors — not necessarily intentionally but perhaps providing an interesting insight into the group’s dynamics.
Once the next date has been confirmed, the dishwasher is loaded and that is it until the next month.
‘I am lucky to be a part of a hugely convivial group of readers — and I’d like to invite you in’
‘We are bonded through our shared experiences, conversations and debates that stem from reading the same book’
Except, that’s not it. Our love of books was what brought us together and now our friendship is so much more than that. We are bonded through our shared experiences, conversations and debates that stem from reading the same book. Our lives can be mirrored in our choice of book and that can feel comforting — we know we are not alone. We discuss staying up until 2am crying over a character’s mother’s death, after one of us has shared our own medical or family issue. Or our book can transport us to the streets of India and be a complete escape from the job we didn’t get, or the bad first date. All of which is discussed and examined over a glass of wine.
In an age of disconnection, perhaps the idea of Book Club can satiate our ultimate craving of human connection. There must be a reason why Book Clubs are so popular, in today’s fast, on-demand world. It feels like every female celebrity has their own Book Club — Dua Lipa hosts one of the most popular popculture book podcasts today. Book Club is a date firmly marked in our calendar each month, for the sole purpose of sharing ideas and challenging our viewpoints, for coming together and connecting, learning and growing from one another. What begins as an off-hand comment on a Wednesday night is shaped and reshaped, returned to throughout the month, and then challenged again in the next book.
In Memoriam by Alice Winn... blends a tender, aching love story with the brutal reality of war, making every emotion feel intense, honest and unforgettable.
The Nightingale by Kristen Hannah... takes you from Paris to the French countryside following the brave acts of women in Occupied France in WWII with vivid, beautiful writing.
The Lake House by Kate Morton... is a gripping dual-timeline mystery where a baby’s unsolved disappearances from a 1930s Cornish estate haunts the family for decades until a modern detective uncovers the heartbreaking truth.
Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver... is a captivating Pulitzer-Prize winning reimagining of David Copperfield that follows a resilient boy navigating foster care and the opioid crisis in Appalachia with rare warmth and honesty — you won’t be able to put it down.
One of Us by Elizabeth Day... plunges us into a world of privilege, politics and moral flexibility, with fascinatingly awful characters — it is sharp, unsettling and uncomfortably familiar.
Lady Tan’s Circle of Women by Lisa See... draws on the life of a 15th-century Chinese physician to celebrate female friendship, resilience, and women supporting one another in a patriarchal world.
All My Mothers by Joanna Glen... captures, with quiet precision and deep compassion, how the people who care for us in different ways can shape who we become, even when love is imperfect and lives are fractured.
‘There is a quiet escapism in holding a physical book that feels increasingly rare’
The shared practice of reading a book together is beautiful — perhaps one of the most human things we can still do today. How is it that someone can read the same book at the exact same time, but experience it in such different ways? How can a book get rated both 2 and 9 by the same group? This is fascinating and something that is never reconciled by the end of the night.
We gather to talk about the book of the month, but for me, it’s the shared experience of having done it together that brings the pure joy of Book Club. As Abraham Verghese said, ‘ There is that lovely feeling of one reader telling another, ‘You must read this...’ contributing to a discourse that begins at a Book Club in a living room, but then spreads.’
There is a quiet escapism in holding a physical book that feels increasingly rare. If you are someone who tends to mostly read on holidays, I’d invite you to try and find time to pick it up in your daily life. Even better, join a Book Club to hold you to account for your reading, or just join one for the joy of gossiping with a new friend over dinner and call it ‘Book Club — they’ll never know! ■