Managing Bullying Behavior By Dr. Raun Melmed, MD According to StopBullying.gov, about 49% of children in grades 4-12 reported being bullied by other students at school at least once during the past month. In different surveys, children report being bullied by others, witnessing bullying behavior and even engaging in bullying behaviors themselves. Sadly, parents might be the last to know. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development research, studies show that anyone involved with bullying — including those who bully others, those who are bullied and those who bully and are bullied — are at increased risk for mental and behavioral problems including anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, difficulty sleeping, self-harm or suicidal thoughts. Bullying affects everyone who witnesses it. Some children might support the child performing bullying behavior, which frequently perpetuates the problem. Other observers might walk away from the situation, feeling uncomfortable or fearing involvement, while others might come to the aid of the person being bullied. Those who bully can either be popular or be socially marginalized children who may have been bullied themselves previously. A vicious cycle then ensues, where those who are bullied can be at risk of bullying others. ‘
When Your Child Bullies Others If your child has demonstrated bullying behavior, you can take steps including the following: 1. Help your child understand they can change. Bullying behavior, like any other behavior, can be altered. Referring to a child as someone engaging in bullying behavior rather than labeling them as a bully reinforces that ability to change. 2. Help your child understand how bullying hurts them, those who witness the bullying, and the targets of bullying behavior. Give real examples of the results of your child’s actions, and help your child to see the targets of bullying behavior as people with feelings and positive attributes. 3. Set firm and consistent limits on your child’s aggressive behavior. Be sure your child knows that bullying behavior is never okay. 4. Be a positive role model. Children almost always mimic what they see at home, so it’s important to demonstrate kind and compassionate behaviors. 5. Develop practical solutions with others. Together with the principal, teachers, counselors, and parents of the children your child has bullied, explore positive ways to stop the bullying.
When Your Child is Bullied If you suspect your child is being bullied, act! This is not snitching. It is protecting a child’s civil rights — as well as their minds and bodies. Alert school officials to the problems and begin