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By JOSH GIRSKY Sun News Editor
Detailed plans for the structure of the Cornell College of Business approved in January by the Board of Trustees will focus on improving faculty collaboration and research and have minimal immediate effect on students, according to Rohit Verma, the college’s deputy dean designate of external relations
The college’s structure was determined by seven committees representing faculty, students, alumni and staff, with the goal of ensuring “the structural and academic decisions that will define the new College of Business are as broadly informed as possible,” according to the University
While the new college’s dean and deputy deans will administrate the three schools merged in the College of Business the School of Hotel Administration, Charles H Dyson School of Applied Economics and Management and Samuel Curtis Johnson School of Management the schools’ identities will remain largely the same, according to Verma
“When the Board of Trustees approved the college, they told us that we have two guidances,” Verma said “First is that the new college should preserve the identity of each school and make them better, and second was that we have to integrate across the three schools so that they can all take advantage of each other’s strengths ”
Verma said that despite many students’
concerns, most aspects of the student experience will not change in the short run, and the college will mainly focus on improving inefficiencies associated with having business faculty spread across three schools
“Those are things like the duplication of when we try to hire faculty,” Verma said “We compete with each other and oftentimes we may not be able to hire the best faculty ”
The most immediate effect of the merger will be increased collaboration among facul-
ty between the three schools, according to Verma
“Right now faculty are isolated,” he said “They are focused on their own schools, but once they start integrating across in the long run you will imagine they will develop new collaborative curricula Right now there is no formal collaboration ”
In the new college, faculty members will collaborate through area coordinators who
See COLLEGE OF BUSINESS page 4

“[ Faculty ] are focused on their own schools, but once they start integrating across in the long run you will imagine they will develop new collaborative curricula.” Dean Rohit Verma

Cornell University Police Chief Kathy Zoner informed the community of an ongoing investigation into “
University in an email this evening
Zoner said the threats were made by one “unknown individual” who she said has used two different web-
University
The threats leveled against the University were characterized as nonspecific, not singling out a definite location or motive, but contain “clear reference to causing harm,” according to Zoner
“We are working with other local and federal law enforcement agencies, increasing our staffing and presence on all of our campuses, ” she said “Sharing this information with you out of an abundance of caution so that all of us can increase our vigilance ” C
continue about their normal activities but report any suspicious activity to CUPD, Zoner wrote The police chief promised to update the Cornell community in further detail by noon on Wednesday
Compiled by Phoebe Keller
By STEPHANIE YAN Sun Assistant News Editor
Prof Rebecca Stoltzfus Ph D ’92, nutritional sciences, has been appointed vice provost for underg r a d u a t e e d u c a t i o n , Provo s t
Mi c h a e l Ko t l i k o f f a n n o u n c e d Monday Prof Julia Thom-Levy, physics, will serve in the newly created provost ’ s fellow for pedagogical innovation position Stoltzfus will begin her fiveyear term on July 1 and Thom-
i
a t e l y 5f o o t - 7 - i n c h e s t o 5 - f o o t - 9 - i n c h e s t a l l , w i t h s h o r t b row n h a i r o n t h
Levy will begin her three-year term Aug 1, according to the University In this role, Stoltzfus who currently serves as the provost ’ s fellow for public engagement will collaborate with deans and student life administrative groups to oversee academic initiatives
s u c h a s re s e a rc h , a c a d e m i c integrity and inclusivity on campus, the University reported Stoltzfus is a professor in the Division of Nutritional Sciences
a n d t h e d i re c t o r o f C o r n e l l’s Program in Public Health She has helped

d e v e l o p p r o g r a m s to increase s t u d e n t e n g a g em e n t
n g i n t h
c
i c u l u m , according to the University T h o m - L e v y ’ s w o rk a s t h e provost ’ s fellow for pedagogical
i n n o v a t i o n w i l l f o c u s on improvi n g a n d i n n o v a t i n g C o r n e l l ’ s c u r r i c u l a a n d t e a c hing, accordi n g t o t h e University She is currently an associate professor of physics and directs a research group at the Large Hadron Collider, as well as mentoring undergraduates conducting research
“I am excited to work withthe leaders of [campus] programs toward even greater inclusivity.”
Prof Rebecca Stoltzfus Ph D ’92

Stoltzfus said she looks forward to overseeing
University
“I am excited to
In h i s a n n o u n c e m e n t , Kotlikoff added that he was confid e n t i n St o l t z f u s a n d T h o mLevy’s potential to improve the quality of undergraduate education at Cornell
“Together they will be invaluable assets in creating and sup-
inclusivity,
responsibility and academic success for all of our students,” Stoltzfus said








By ELEANOR GOOD Sun Staff Writer
Efforts to mitigate climate change frequently force governments to enact policies that hurt the poor, according to Prof Ravi Kanbur, applied economics and management
In a lecture Monday, Kanbur discussed climate justice which he defined as justice between generations affected by climate change, and to those harmed by climate policies, economics and philosophy three topics he said were all interrelated
Economics often cannot apply to the environment because it can only efficiently allocate resources when market prices reflect true scarcity clean air, for example, has no market price according to Kanbur
Economists and policy makers also have to consider the long-term consequences of climate change, he said “ We think now of externalities as extending over time to multiple future generations,” Kanbur said “Our actions today have impacts on future generations ahead who have no say in the matter ”
Kanbur added that even when market prices are adjusted to reflect their social costs through taxes, the outcomes can have a disproportionately large effect on poor countries and the poor in rich countries
“ Think of the implication of high gasoline taxes for those who have to drive long distances for their low-paying jobs,” he said “ They lose as a result of tr ying to fix this problem ”
Governments then need to balance economic equality and counteracting climate change, which introduces politics and philosophy to the issue, according to Kanbur
“Accepting that curbing carbon emissions is the right thing to do from the point of view of future generations,

what do you do if the only policy instruments available to you make the poor worse off?” he asked
Kanbur added that in order to counteract the adverse effects of climate regulation policy on the poor, “ you could devise a ver y clever compensation scheme, as many climate activists have done,” but governments tend to lack the tools or political power to accomplish this
While Kanbur acknowledged that addressing climate change may solve other forms of inequality and benefit this generation’s poor, he said economic injustice was
likely inevitable during this process
“As you move towards efficiency, there are going to be distributional consequences, ” he said
The issues Kanbur covered in his lecture the final installment in a semester-long series on climate change will be further addressed at a climate justice conference at Cornell from May 24 to 25, according to the University
By MOLLY KLUGER Sun Staff Writer
The Office of the Dean of Faculty honored approximately 40 retiring Cornell f a c u l t y m e m b e r s a t a re c e p t i o n l a s t Thursday at the A D White House
The retirees including professors, researchers and librarians were recognized for their dedication to teaching, research, and the overall Cornell community, the University said
Retiring faculty recounted their Cornell experiences at the ceremony
Prof Emeritus Bob Swieringa, the dean emeritus of the Samuel Curtis Johnson Graduate School of Management, said he believes Cornell is “ an empowering envi-
ronment that really allows people to blossom ” “And when that happens to you, you ’ re forever grateful,” Swieringa said at the receptionoo
P r o f E m e r i t u s George Hudler, p l a n t s c i e n c e who previo u s
Mushrooms, Mischievous Molds class said he appreciated the opportunity to teach the course, which initially did not satisfy distribution requirements and students took purely due to interest, accord-

ing to the University “I hope we never lose sight of that celebration of inquir y, ” Hudler said at the event “ Whether it meets a requirement or not, I hope we always give our u n d e r g r a d u a t e s t u d e n t s t h a t l i t t l e b i t o f elbow room to just do somet h i n g d i f f e rent ”
Professors Emeriti, which connects retired faculty to the Cornell community and campus traditions through lecture series,
l
according to the organization’s website CAPE’s initiatives include volunteering for activities such as freshman move-in day, work at the plantations, the Johnson Museum of Art and the Paleontological Research Institution, according to Prof Emeritus Ann Lemley, fiber science and apparel design In addition to staying involved on campus, retired faculty are encouraged to stay connected with each other, Lemley said “ We are planning our first annual social hour for retired faculty in June to increase the social connections,” she said
By YUN SOO KIM Sun News Editor
o n c e r n s o f i n t e g r i t y i n a n e m a i l t o t h e c a m p u s t o d a y T h e e t h i c s s y s t e m o p e r a t e d b y a n i n d e p e n -
d e n t c o m p a n y,
Et h i c s Po i n t w i l l p r ov i d e a n a n o n y m o u s p l a tf o r m f o r m e m b e r s o f t h e C o r n e l l c o m m u n i t y “ a s w e l l a s t h o s e o u t s i d e i t ” t o re p o r t “ i m p r o p e r c o n d u c t o r v i o l a t i o n s o f C o r n e l l Un i v e r s i t y ’ s p o l i c i e s ” u s i n g e i t h e r t h e t e l e p h o n e l i n e o r t h e w e b s i t e , t h e e m a i l e x p l a i n e d “ Un d e r l y i n g e v e r yt h i n g w e d o t e a c h i n g , re s e a r c h , c re a t i v e a c t i v i t y, p u b l i c e n g a g e m e n t , a n d d a y - t o - d a y o p e r a t i o n s t h i s f o u n d a t i o n i s o n l y a s s t r o n g a s o u r s h a r e d u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f w h a t c o n s t i t u t e s e t h i c a l c o nd u c t ” R a w l i n g s w r o t e i n t h e e m a i l H e e m p h a s i z e d t h a t t h o s e w h o w i t n e s s a n i n f r a c t i o n o f C o r n e l l ’ s e t h i c a l c o n d u c t h a v e a n “ o b l i g a t i o n t o re p o r t t h e c o n c e r n ” T h i s e t h i c s s t a n d a rd s , w h i c h i n c l u d e a l l u n i t s o f t h e Un i v e r s i t y, a r e o u tl i n e d i n t h e f o r m a l S t a n d a r d s o f E t h i c a l C o n d u c t Po l i c y, a v a i l a b l e o n l i n e Ma t t e r s o f i n t e g r it y w e re d e f i n e d a s i n c l u di n g “ r e s e a r c h , f i n a n c i a l m a t t e r s , e n v i r o n m e n t a l h e a l t h a n d s a f e t y, a t h l e t i c s [ a n d ] re g u l a t o r y c o m p l ia n c e , ” t h e e m a i l s a i d T h e i n t e r i m p re s i d e n t c l a r i f i e d t h a t t h e “ h o t l i n e s e r v i c e d o e s n o t re p l a c e o r s u p e r s e d e e x i s t i n g re p o r ti n g , ” b u t c a n b e o f s e r v i c e t o s t u d e n t s w h o s e e k t o m a i n t a i n a n a n o n y m o u s s t a t u s w h i
COLLEGE OF BUSINESS
Continued from page 1
help arrange initiatives from research to developing curriculum in areas that cut across the three schools, according to Verma Verma added that faculty will be able to choose primar y and secondar y areas of study they want to associate with “ This is clearly a faculty-driven effort,” he said
However, concern about how the College of Business was created lingers among some Cornellians
Richard Walroth grad, chair of the Graduate and Professional Student Assembly, said he believes the college was not properly vetted through shared govern a n c e
“Withholding support for the College of Business at this critical point will not help students, faculty and staff.”
N e l s o n B i l l i n g t o n ’ 1 9
ment “ Pa
process does seem fairly inclusive,” Walroth said “Many students remain displeased at the initial decision However, this is more out of concern for the potential precedent this has set for other potential decisions to be made down the road ”
Gabriel Kaufman ’18, undesignated at large representative on the Student Assembly, expressed lingering concerns about the effects of the college on students and staff
“I think that it is one thing to decide to merge the schools, but it is another when students and faculty start to see their daily lives affected,” Kaufman said “ This merger might change what classes are offered and by which professors ”
However, Nelson Billington ’19, a member of the undergraduate committee and S A SHA representative, said he believes his committee and others have succeeded in creating a viable college from the idea approved by the Board of Trustees
“Provost Kotlikoff and his senior administrative team have done a fast and efficient job of filling the empty vessel to maintain the strengths of many core classes, encourage cross college collaborations and better define business education at Cornell,”
Billington said “ Withholding support for the College of Business at this critical juncture will not help students, faculty and staff preparing for the implementation of this plan ”
Josh Girsky can be reached at jgirsky@cornellsun com


m m o n Ap p l i c a t i o n f o r t h e u p c o m i n g
s c h o o l ye a r w i l l s t i l l a s k w h e t h e r s t u d e n t s h a ve
b e e n f o u n d g u i l t y o f a m i s d e m e a n o r o r f e l o n y b u t re m ove p a r t o f t h e q u e s t i o n a s k i n g a b o u t a n y
o t h e r c r i m e s , s p o k e s w o m a n Ab a Bl a n k s o n t o l d
T h e A s s o c i
t
T h e g u i d e c o m e s a s s t u d e n t s a n d c i v i l r i g h t s o r g a n i z a t i o n s h a ve p u s h e d u n i ve r s i t i e s t o d ro p q u e s t i o n s a b o u t c r i m i n a l re c o rd s W h i l e m a n y o f t h e n a t i o n ’ s l a r g e s t u n i ve r s i t i e s , i n c l u d i n g t h e Un i ve r s i t y o f C a l i f o r n i a s y s t e m , d o n o t a s k a n y q u e s t i o n s a b o u t a s t u d e n t ’ s c r i m i n a l re c o rd , a m a j o r i t y s t i l l d o Ot h e r s l i k e Ne w Yo rk Un i ve r s i t y re v i e w a s t u
LITTLE ROCK, Ark (AP)
An Arkansas judge resigned Monday after new allegations surfaced that he used his authority for the last 30 years to sexually prey on young men charged with crimes who needed financial help or who were afraid of losing their children or jobs Pa
District Judge Joe Boeckmann resigned after a state judicial
with new allegations, including one case when a man said he was taken to a cour troom, told
Allegations were made public last year that Boeckmann had engaged in inappropriate sexual
tographing and paddling defendants in exchange for lighter
sentences
Documents detailing the new allegations were provided to The Associated Press by the commission under an open records request
“He’s a criminal predator who used his judicial power to feed his corrupt desires Every minute he served as a judge was an insult to the Arkansas Judiciary,” said David Sachar, executive director of the Judicial Discipline and Disability Commission, which had been investigating to determine if the judge should be sanctioned or kicked off the bench
The former judge has not been charged with a crime
Sachar said Monday that he turned parts of the information over to the Arkansas State Police, a special state prosecutor and federal authorities He said since
part of the allegations stretched to when Boeckmann was a private attorney and a deputy prosecutor, the commission will contact the Arkansas Judiciar y ’ s Committee on Professional Conduct to investigate including allegations from at least one witness that Boeckmann tried to pay him not to speak with investigators Boeckmann had previously denied the allegations against him But in his resignation letter dated Monday, he agreed never to work in public service again
“I further promise to never seek employment as a local, county or state employee or public ser vant in the State of Arkansas ” he wrote Jeff Rosenzweig, Boeckmann ’ s attorney, said he will not make any further comments
B ATO N RO U G E ,
La (AP) Two Baton Ro u g
acted in self-defense and were justified in fatally
shot and wounded them a
Februar y, a prosecutor
Mo
s office released dramatic video of the gunbattle
Dashcam video from t h e o f
s
c
s e r s shows the suspect, 22year-old Calvin Smith, e x i t h i s ve h i c l e a n d immediately open fire on the officers with a semi-automatic rifle as
t h e y p u l l e d u p t o Smith’s parked car at the end of the chase
The officers returned
f i re , f a t a l l y w o u n d i n g Smith, according to a report released Monday by East Baton Rouge District Attorney Hillar Moore
T h e re p o r t s a y s a t least 54 shots were fired
d u r i n g t h e Fe b 1 3 shootout, which lasted l e s s t h a n 2 0 s e c o n d s The suspect fired at least 20 shots from an AR-15 rifle, while the officers fired at least 34 shots
b e t we e n t h e m f ro m t h e i r s e m i - a u t o m a t i c pistols, Moore’s report said Moore said he had “ no idea” how the officers survived the shooting Officer Theodore Smith was shot once in the abdomen, and his vehicle was str uck by t h re e b u l l e t s ; Of f i c e r Sean Garic was hit in the head by one of the rifle shots, and his vehicle was hit by eight bullets, a c c o rd i n g t o Mo o re ’ s report
“All I can say is that Go d m u s t h a ve b e e n with them and protected them,” Moore said at a news conference Video from Officer Sm i t h’s b o d y c a m e r a shows him putting his cruiser in park and exiting his cruiser when the gunfire erupts After an initial burst of gunfire, the officer began running as another volley of shots erupted
“Shots fired! Officer hit!” Smith shouted over the blaring of sirens after the gunfire ended Sm i t h c ro u c h e d down next to a vehicle and radioed in a plea for paramedics to come to the scene “Two officers hit!” he shouted Calvin Smith died at a hospital hours after the shooting The officers were released from the hospital less than three days after
T h e o f f i c e r s we re responding to a domest i c d i s t u r b a n c e w h e n Smith led them on a chase through a neighborhood that ended outside his home
RALEIGH, N C (AP) A potentially epic clash over transgender rights took shape Monday when the U S Justice Department sued North Carolina over the state ’ s bathroom law after the governor refused to back down
In unusually forceful language, U S Attorney General Loretta Lynch said North Carolina’s law
restrooms and showers corresponding to the gender on their birth certificate amounts to “ state-sponsored discrimination” and is aimed at “ a problem that doesn’t exist ” “ What this law does is inflict further indignity on a population that has already suffered far more than its fair share,” she said, speaking directly to residents of her native state “ This law provides no benefit to society, and all it does is harm innocent Americans ”
Billions of dollars in federal aid for North Carolina and a potentially landmark decision regarding the reach of the nation’s civil rights laws are at stake in the dispute, which in recent weeks has triggered boycotts and cancellations aimed at pressuring the state into repealing the measure
Last week, the U S Justice Department said the law amounts to illegal sex discrimination and gave Gov Pat McCror y until Monday to say he would
refuse to enforce it When the deadline arrived, a defiant McCror y instead sued the federal government, arguing that the state law is a “ commonsense privacy policy” and that the Justice Department’s position is “baseless and blatant overreach ”
McCror y, a Republican who is up for re-election in November, accused the Obama administration of unilaterally rewriting federal civil rights law to protect transgender people’s access to bathrooms, locker rooms and showers across the countr y “ This is not a North Carolina issue It is now a national issue,” he said
Later in the day, the Justice Department struck back by suing the state, seeking a court order declaring the law discriminator y and unenforceable
A judge could begin hearing arguments in the competing cases within weeks, during which North Carolina will probably tr y to stop the government from temporarily blocking the law or stripping away federal funding, said Rina Lindevaldsen, a Liberty University professor specializing in family and constitutional law
With appeals courts around the countr y diverging on whether transgender people are protected under federal civil rights laws, “this seems like the kind of thing that’s on track for the Supreme Court,” she said
OKLAHOMA CITY (AP)
Tornadoes swept across portions of the Plains on Monday, killing two people in Oklahoma including an elderly man who was inside a home that was torn apart by one of the violent storms
An emergency management director said a man believed to be in his upper 70s died when a tornado hit a home near Wynnewood, south of Oklahoma City Authorities also confirmed the death of a man near the town of Connerville, Johnston County Sheriff ’ s Office Sgt Stacey Pulley said
The storm was considered so violent that forecasters declared a “tornado emergency ” for communities in the twister’s path
“You are in a life-threatening situation,” forecasters declared while warning the communities of Roff, population 725, and Hickory, population 71, which were ultimately spared major damage “Flying debris will be deadly to those caught without shelter ”
Dana Lance was driving
through the Pontotoc County community of Roff on her way home from work Monday when the skies grew ominous, and she heard tornado sirens and forecasters on the radio urging people in the area to take cover
“I parked and went into the school, which has a safe room, ” Lance said “There were kids and elderly people, dogs and cats, babies It was like the whole town was there ”
One person sustained minor injuries in Murray County, where the tornado moved slowly through a rural area on its path that would take it south of Roff, said Gary Ligon, Murray County’s emergency management director
Ligon said the injured person was taken to a hospital but the nature of the injury was not immediately known
The Storm Prediction Center in Norman, Oklahoma, warned that twisters as far north as Nebraska and Iowa could develop late Monday night
The bad weather should settle in the Ohio and Tennessee valleys on Tuesday, forecasters said, while another storm system should bring bad weather to the area from north Texas to near St Louis on Wednesday
Monday’s series of violent thunderstorms dropped tornadoes near Oklahoma City and in the rolling hills south of the city, destroying some homes and barns
The Oklahoma Highway Patrol closed Interstate 35 near Wynne wood for 15 minutes Monday so the storm could pass, temporarily shutting down the primary route between Oklahoma City and Dallas
Garvin County Emergency Management Director Bud Ramming said early Monday evening that the fatality was the only known injury reported to his office
Television images showed homes destroyed, multiple overturned vehicles and trees torn limb to limb A roof lay near a hay barn after the first tornado reports
KANSAS CITY, Mo
(AP) A Kansas City, Kansas, police detective helping respond to a report of a suspicious person near a racetrack was fatally shot Monday, and a parolee sought for questioning in that and an ensuing string of reported carjackings was wounded after a shootout with police in neighboring Missouri
The detective was shot at least twice about 12:30 p m near the Kansas Speedway, underwent surgery at a hospital and later died, his department said in a statement
“Our detective fought a good fight, but unfortunately he died from his injuries,”
Kansas City, Kansas, Police Chief Terr y
Zeigler said in a tweet
“Thanks for the support & prayers ”
Police did not immediately release his name, though Carolynn Lancaster told the Kansas City Star the detective was her son, 39-year-old Brad Lancaster
Police said the gunman, after wounding the detective, fled in the officer ’ s unmarked car, then hijacked a vehicle with two children inside before abandoning it in nearby Basehor, Kansas, leaving those kids unharmed
Police publicly appealed for help in trying to find Curtis Ayers, 28, for questioning in the shooting That Tonganoxie, Kansas, man ultimately was taken into custody in
Kansas City, Missouri, when he crashed the car he was driving while being pursued by officers, then was shot by police after trying to carjack a woman ’ s vehicle
That woman was wounded and taken to a hospital, Kansas City, Missouri, police spokeswoman Kari Thompson said without specifying her medical condition
Ayers was hospitalized in stable condition, police spokesman Patrick McCallop said
“This individual was very dangerous We are so happy that this individual is in custody,” Thompson told reporters later “We are so glad this situation has come to an end ”
Carolynn Lancaster, who couldn’t immedi-
ately be reached by The Associated Press, told the Kansas City Star her son “ was the rock of the family ”
Brad Lancaster was a U S Air Force veteran who had ser ved two tours of duty overseas, including one in Kuwait, the newspaper reported Lancaster said her son had a wife and two daughters Ayers has had longstanding trouble with the law, having served prison time in Kansas in recent years for convictions involving child abandonment, fleeing or tr ying to elude law enforcers, and interference with a law enforcement officer, online Kansas Department of Corrections records show



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In g a v i d e o o f
C h r i s t o p h e r H i t c h e n s b e i n g w a t e r -
b o a r d e d b y Va n i t y Fa i r i n t h e n a m e o f j o u r n a l i s m No , t h e s e p a s t 1 0 h o u r s s p e n t o n t h e c o u c h i n m y l o u n g e h a v e
b e e n e n t i r e l y u n p r o d u c t i v e , a n d e v e n a
m u c h - n e e d e d b r e a k t o w a t c h Ga m e o f
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B a r n u m a n d G e o r g e Wa l l a c e t h e R e p u b l i c a n s h a v e n o m i n a t e d , a n d a s t h e m o n t h s h a v e g o n e b y I o n l y f e e l m o r e a n d m o r e v i n d i c a t e d i n t h a t b e l i e f B u t t h i s i s n ’ t a c o l u m n a b o u t p o l i t i c s T h i s i s a c o l u m n a b o u t c o l u m n s W h e n I c h o s e t h e n a m e o f t h e c o lu m n , T h e Ja c o b i n , I d i d i t m a i n l y b e c a u s e I w a n t e d t o g e t b a c k o u t o n t h e b e a c h , a n d i t w a s o n l y i d e a m y s i s t e r a n d I c a m e u p w i t h t h a t w a s e v e n m o de r a t e l y a c c e p t a b l e It p l a y e d o n b o t h m y n a m e a n d m y a f f i n i t y f o r Eu r o p e a n h i st o r y a n d i t s o u n d e d a l o t b e t t e r t h a n “ St u f f I L i k e t o Wr i t e A b o u t ” It w a s n ’ t n e c e s s a r i l y t h e r e t o i n f o r m t h e r e a d e r a b o u t t h e c o l u m n ; I w a s n ’ t p l a n n i n g o n s t a r t i n g a n y r e v o l u t i o n s o r m a k i n g e x t e n s i v e u s e o f t h e g u i l l o t i n e I k e e p i n m y d o r m r o o m , a n d I i n s t r u c t e d a f r i e n d f r o m h o m e t o d r i v e u p t o It h a c a a n d s l a p m e i f I e v e r i n v o k e d R o b e s p i e r r e o r S a i n t - Ju s t i n m y w r i t i n g I t s n a m e s a k e , t h e J a c o b i n C l u b , d i d n ’ t m e e t t h a t n i c e o f a n e n d i n g By t h e t i m e t h
K n i g h t s o f t h e R e p u b l i c a n Pa r t y ) m y i t c h f o r r e v o l u t i o n i s v i r t u a l l y n o n e x i st e n t S o m e t i m e s p e o p l e t e l l m e I t a l k a b o u t Tr u m p t o o m u c h T h e C o r n e l l R e v i e w o n c e c i t e d m y c o l u m n s a s p a r t o f a s t o r y t h e y r a n d e t a i l i n g t h e D a i l y Su n ’ s a l l e g e d o b s e s s i o n w i t h t h e t a c o b o w l - l o v i n g b u s i n e s s m a n Wr i t e r C a s e y B r e z n i c k c h a s t i s e d o u r o p i n i o n s e c t i o n f o r f o c u s i n g s o m u c h o n s o m e o n e w h o s o c l e a r l y w a s a n o n - f a c t o r i n t h e n o m in a t i o n p r o c e s s a n d w a s t o t a l l y u n d e s e r vi n g o f o u r a t t e n t i o n We l l , C a s e y B r e z n i c k , w h o ’ s l a u g h i n g n o w ? Pe r h a p s i f m o r e p e o p l e h a d w r i t t e n a b o u t Tr u m p l i k e w e d i d , y o u r p a r t y w o u l d n o t b e i n t h e m e s s i t h a s s o d e l i g h t f u l l y f o u n d i t s e l f i n T h e C o r n e l l R e v i e w m a y “ n o t a p o l o g i z e ” f o r a n y t h i n g , b u t e v e n t h e y m u s t a d m i t w h a t a s o r r y s t a t e t h e i r p a r t y i s i n No , I t h i n k I w r o t e a b o u t Tr u m p j u s t e n o u g h , a n d , n o d o u b t , h e w i l l c o n t i n u e t o b e m y m u s e f o r t h e n e x t f i v e m o n t h s a n d 3 0 d a y s b e f o r e ( a g a i n , G o d w i l l i n g ) h e a s c e n d s b a c k u p h i s e s c a l a t o r a n d o u t o f A m e r i c a n p o l it i c s f o r t h e d u r a t i o n o f f o r e v e r B u t a g a i n , t h i s i s n ’ t a c o l u m n a b o u t Tr u m p It’s a c o l u m n a b o u t c o l u m n s , a n d i t ’ s s a f e t o s a y T h e Ja c o b i n w o u l d n ’ t e x i s t w e r e i t n o t f o r a f e w v e r y i m p o rt a n t p e o p l e : m y p r e v i o u s e d i t o r, S l o a n e Gr i n s p o o n , w h o r e a d m y t r e a t i s e o n w h y t h e B a c k s t r e e t B o y s w e r e t h e g r e a te s t b o y b a n d o f t h e 1 9 9 0 s a n d d e c i d e d t h a t I s o m e h o w m e r i t e d a c o l u m n i n t h i s p u b l i c a t i o n ; m y c u r r e n t e d i t o r, Pa u l i n a G l a s s , w h o a l w a y s m a k e s s u r e m y c o l u m n s a r e f i t f o r p u b l i c a t i o n a n d f r e e o f p e s k y O x f o r d c o m m a s ; m y s i st e r s , f o r b e i n g h o n e s t a n d s t r a i g h t f o rw a r d i n t h e i r c r i t i c i s m a n d s u g g e s t i o n s ; m y p a r e n t s , f o r b e i n g t h e s a m e w a y, o n l y m o r e g e n t l e W i t h o u t a l l o f t h e i r s u p p o r t a n d a d v i c e , I w o u l d n ’ t b e h e r e t o d a y A n d t h e n t h e r e i s y o u , d e a r r e a d e r L o y a l r e a d e r s , d i s l o y a l r e a d e r s , p e r e n n ia l a n g r y c o m m e n t e r “A b e ’ 1 4 ” , r
Hebani Duggal | Teach Me How to Duggal
There’sa quote chalked into the wall near Rockefeller that I knew existed, but never really actually saw until about a week ago when I caught a glimpse of it on accident It’s yellow chalk, carved carefully above a bench built into the concrete wall leading up to the Big Red Barn “Dear God, be good to me, ” it reads “The sea is so wide, and my boat is so small ” Someone I respect very much brought it up to me my freshman year “I think about the quote a lot when finals come around,” he said I scoffed what would the smartest kid I know here know about small boats and wide oceans? The curve has always been in your favor; how much better do you want God to be to you?
Coming on a full year after that particular conversation, I’ve realized a couple things One of those things is that there is a lot more to life to simply having things go your way In fact, at least this year, I can confidently say very little has gone my way
I h a v e c o m e t o t h e c o n c l u s i o n t h a t w

I came into the year wanting everything everyone else seemed to so effortlessly have: great grades, a social life, a Kim/Kanye level relationship and most importantly, adequate sleep I can do this, I told myself And with as much motivation as I approached this year, I am now leaving it behind filled with a sense of defeat and disappointment
I want so badly to put a spin on this year, if for no other reason, but for the betterment of this column, and subsequently, your enjoyment Every kid that’s chosen to “write about a time you failed” knows that that college essay only gets you into college if you end it on a positive note something you learned about yourself, something you reconciled with, something good Something ending with you looking optimistically into the future as a more mature teen, ready to head to college and change the world for the better Unfortunately, I am convinced that attempting to look at things this way all the time might get you into college, but it does not necessarily get you through college Things go wrong Things don’t go your way not once, not twice, but sometimes over and over again until you are left frustrated and angry and sad at yourself, at the people around you, at Cornell and at everything you can find yourself in access to There is not always a silver lining to find in every situation that goes wrong and coming to terms with that fact has been what a large part of this year has consisted of for me
What always holds true, however, is how you behave in the situations you have no control over I came into this year believing I had a right to having things go my way, and if they didn’t, I had a right to take my frustrations out on the people around me. I have come to the conclusion that what separates those that make it out of college more mature than how they entered is how they have chosen to react to what has been dealt to them “Be so good, they can ’ t ignore you ” is usually a quote reserved for your academic abilities, professional abilities or maybe even sporting abilities I have found this year to prove that this quote stands true for your behavior as well be so good to the people around you, no matter what you face, so that they are there for you and they are rooting for you And even if they aren ’ t, they cannot ignore the good that you are



“Thanks for writing this. Cornell Dining ... are average at best, and sometimes downright terrible A previous comment in a similar article mentioned that the unit cost of a swipe at a dining room is just a touch over $3, meaning Cornell Dining charges a 400 percent markup and we all know only a small portion of that goes to labor ” J R
Re: ““GUEST ROOM | The Price of an Anti-Competitive Burrito,” Opinion May 5, 2016
t i c u l a r l y s o f o r t h e Re p u b l i c a n b i g b u s i n e s s b a s e ) a n d t h re a t e n i n g t o d e f a u l t o n U S Tre a s u r y b o n d s t o u s i n g n u c l e a r w e a p o n s a g a i n s t s t a t e s w h o s e l e a d e r s q u e s t i o n t h e l e n g t h o f h i s f i n g e r s , t h e w o r l d w o u l d b e f a r w o r s e o f f w i t h T h e
Do n a l d i n t h e W h i t e Ho u s e Bu t h e y, a t l e a s t L a t i n A m e r i c a n d i g n i t a r i e s w o u l d f i n a l l y l e a r n j u s t h ow t o p r o p e r l y m a k e t a c o b ow l s ( i n c i d e nt a l l y, t h e o n l y d i s h w i t h a h a n d y b u i l ti n w a l l ) T h e D e m o c r a t i c Pa r t y, s u d d e n l y o f f e re d t h e o p p o r t u n i t y t o re t a k e t h e Se n a t e a n d p o s s i b l y t h e Ho u s e , s h o u l d u s e t h i s f e a r t o t h e i r a d v a n -
t a g e i n d o w n - b a l l o t e l e c t i o n s D e m o c r a t s i n c o m p e t i t i v e s t a t e s l i k e Oh i o , I l l i n o i s a n d Pe n n s y l v a n i a s h o u l d e m p h a s i s e t h e w i d e l a t i t u d e
t h a t a G O P l o c k o n t h e e xe c u t i v e a n d l e g i s l a t u re ( a n d , m o s t l i k e l y,
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t i c s s h o u l d b e re g a rd e d w i t h s u s p ic i o n , a R e p u b l i c a n - c o n t r o l l e d
C o n g r e s s n e x t t o a n e w l y b u i l t Tr u m p Tow e r I I o n Pe n n s y l v a n i a Av e c o u l d d o u n t o l d d a m a g e t o t h e A m e r i c a n e c o n o m y, s o c i e t y a n d , i n d e e d , t h e v e r y f o u n d a t i o n s o f t h i s
c o u n t r y ’ s d e m o c r a c y S o m e s a y t h a t a R e p u b l i c a n C o n g r e s s w o u l d n o t s u p p o r t
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t o f u n d t h e g i a n t w a l l ( i f Me x i c o w o u l d n ’ t c o m e t h r o u g h o n t h e i r s i d e o f t h e ‘d e a l’ ) a n d d e n o u n c i n g t h e m u c h - d e m a n d e d Mu s l i m re gi s t r y Ye t o n e h a s o n l y t o l o o k a t t h e s u p p o r t , g r u d g i n g o r o t h e r w i s e , t h a t Tr u m p i s e x t r a c t i n g f r o m m e m b e r s o f C o n g r e s s T h e e r s tw h i l e Re p Pa u l Ry a n ( R - Wi s ) l e f t h i m s e l f a n o p e n i n g t o g e t b e h i n d T h e Do n a l d a n d n u m e r o u s s e n a t o r s a n d re p re s e n t a t i v e s a re l o u d l y p r oc l a i m i n g t h e i r b a c k i n g f o r h i m Ev e n Se n Jo h n Mc C a i n ( R - A r i z ) , t h e s t e e l - j a w e d V i e t n a m v e t e r a n w h o Do n a l d Tr u m p t e r m e d “ n o t a w a r h e r o , ” h a s a d v a n c e d t h e v i e w t h a t a Pre s i d e n t Tr u m p ( I k n ow, s o u n d s s c a r y ) c o u l d b e a “ c a p a b l e l e a d e r ” Su re , p a r t o f t h i s s u p p o r t i s j u s t e l e c t o r a l p o l i t i c k i n g a s G O P l a wm a k e r s a t t e m p t t o w r i g g l e o u t o f Tr u m p ’ s c l u t c h e s Mu c h o f t h e m a n e u v e r i n g c a n b e a s c r i b e d t o a t t e m p t s a t a v o i d i n g d r a w i n g t h e i re o f Tr u m p ’ s s u p p o r t e r s a s T h e Do n a l d’s a l l i e s p r o m i s e t o c a m p a i g n a g a i n s t p o l i t i c i a n s w h o d o n ’ t s u pp o r t h i m ( s e e Sa r a h Pa l i n ’ s c o n -
The soil in which Trump laid his roots was tilled b years of intolerance deployed to cultivate suppor increasingly anemic GOP As such, there is consi evidence that a Republican Congress would play ball with this short-fingered authoritarian.

t e n t i o n t h a t Pa u l Ry a n w i l l g e t “ C a n t o r - e d” i n h i s Wi s c o n s i n ree l e c t i o n f i g h t ) H o w e v e r, t h e Tr u m p p h e n o m e n o n i s a s m u c h a r e s u l t o f t h e R e p u b l i c a n Pa r t y ’ s t o x i c a n t i - i m m i g r a n t a n d b o rd e rl i n e u l t r a - n a t i o n a l i s t r h e t o r i c a s i t i s i t s n e g l e c t o f Mi d d l e A m e r i c a T h e s o i l i n w h i c h Tr u m p l a i d h i s r o o t s w a s t i l l e d b y y e a r s o f i n t o l e r a n c e d e p l oy e d t o c u l t i v a t e s u p p o r t f o r a n i n c re a s i n g l y a n e m i c G O P A s s u c h , t h e re i s c o n s i d e r a b l e e v i d e n c e t h a t a Re p u b l i c a n C o n g re s s w o u l d p l a y b a l l w i t h t h i s s h o r t - f i n g e re d a u t h o ri t a r i a n O v e r t h e p a s t y e a r, D o n a l d Tr u m p, i n a f a s h i o n a k i n t o t h a t m o u l d g r ow i n g a b ov e y o u r s h ow e rh e a d , h a s c o n t i n u a l l y e a t e n a w a y a t t h e s o c i e t a l n o r m s t h a t f o r m t h e b e d r o c k o f A m e r i c a n d e m o c r a c y Hi s d e m a n d s f o r a “ t o t a l a n d c o mp l e t e s h u t d ow n o f Mu s l i m s ” e n t e ri n g t h e U S u n t i l w e “f i g u re o u t w h a t i s g o i n g o n ” h a v e c o r r o d e d i d e a l s o f e q u a l i t y b e f o re t h e l a w a n d r e l i g i o u s f r e e d o m ( t h e l a t t e r, d e s p i t e s o u t h e r n g o v e r n o r s ’ p r o t e s t s , b e i n g t h e c o r re c t u s a g e o f t h e t e r m ) Fu r t h e r, Tr u m p ’ s v i e w s o f w o m e n a s m i n d l e s s a u t o m a t o n s b e h o l d e n t o t h e w h i m s o f m e n s t r ua t i o n t h re a t e n t o re t a rd p r o g re s s i n t h o s e n o r m s a n d t r a n s p o r t l a r g e s e g m e n t s o f A m e r i c a b a c k t o a t i m e w h e n w o m e n w e re e f f e c t i v e l y c h a tt e l It’s n o t o n l y Tr u m p h i m s e l f t h a t t h r e a t e n s t h e s e n o r m s b u t a l s o , i n d i re c t l y, t h e o p p o s i t i o n t o h i m St a n d a rd s l i k e c i v i l i a n c o n t r o l o f t h e m i l i t a r y a re t h re a t e n e d w h e n o f f i c i a l s s a y t h a t t h e y w i l l re f u s e t o c a r r y o u t Tr u m p ’ s o rd e r s t o “ b r i n g b a c k a h e l l o f a l o t w o r s e t h a n w a t e r b o a rd i n g ” Ba r r y G o l d w a t e r ’ s c o n t e n t i o n t h a t “ e x t re m i s m i n t h e d e f e n s e o f l i b e r t y i s n o v i c e ” re m a i n s a s u n t r u e t o d a y a s i t w a s 5 0 y e a r s a g o T h e v u l n e r a b i l i t y o f s o c i e t a l n o r m s i s i n h e re n t t o d e m o c r a c y w i t h o u t t h a t r i s k n o t r u l y re p res e n t a t i v e a n d a c c o u n t a b l e g ov e r nm e n t c a n e x i s t D e s p i t e t h i s , d e m o c r a c y r e m a i n s t h e m o s t re s i l i e n t f o r m o f g ov e r n m e n t a n d t h e o n l y l e g i t i m a t e w a y t o g ov e r n f r e e i n d i v i d u a l s w i t h d i v e r g i n g n e e d s a n d d e s i r e s D o n a l d Tr u m p ’ s a s c e n d a n c e re p re s e n t s t h e g re a t e s t t h re a t t o t h i s c o u n t r y ’ s f a i t h i n d e m o c r a c y, a f a i t h t h a t re s t s u p o n i d e a s t h a t c o n s t i t u t e a n e v o l u t i o n i n o r g a n i s i n g h u m a n s o c i e t i e s T h e i m p o r t a n c e a n d v a l i d i t y o f t h o s e i d e a s re m a i n s a s t r u e t o d a y a s i n A m e r i c a ’ s y o u t h i t i s o n l y t h e i r i m a g e w i t h i n o u r m i n d s t h a t m a y b e d u l l e d We c a n n o t re l y o n a b l i n d h o p e t h a t t h i s t o o s h a l l p a s s a n d Ju s t i c e w i l l re s t o re A m e r i c a t o g l o r y, f o r A m e r i c a m e a n s n o t h i n g w i t h o u t t h o s e w h o u p h o l d h e r i d e a l s a n d s p i r i t L e t u s n o t f a l l i n t o t h e t e m pt a t i o n t o w h i c h h u m a n i t y h a s t o o o f t e n s u c c u m b e d o f p a r t i c u l a r i z i n g o u r u n i v e r s a l v a l u e s L e t u s i n s t e a d f i g h t a g a i n s t t h e d e m a n d s o f t h e f

BY MARK DISTEFANO Sun Staff Writer
It’s b e e n a j o u r n e y T h e re ’ ve b e e n u p s a n d d ow n s a n d
m a n y e xc i t i n g m o m e n t s f o r m e a s a s t a f f w r i t e r i n t h e
A r t s & En t e r t a i n m e n t s e c t i o n o f T h e Su n r a n k e d # 1
a m o n g c o l l e g e p a p e r s by Pr i n c e t o n Re v i e w a n d I
w o u l d n ’ t t r a d e a m i n u t e o f i t f o r a n y t h i n g Fo r t h e p a s t t h re e ye a r s , I ’ ve h a d t h e p r i v i l e g e o f s h a ri n g m y t h o u g h t s a n d o p i n i o n s o n m y f a vo r i t e a r t f o r m i n t h e w o r l d , c i n e m a , w i t h a c o m m u n i t y o f i n t e l l i g e n t , m e d i a - s a v v y p e o p l e w h o a c t u a l l y e n j oy a r t T h e re ’ s n o f i n e r s c h o o l i n w h i c h t o h a ve a d i a l o g u e a b o u t a r t w o rk w i t h yo u r f e l l ow w r i t e r s , p ro f e s s o r s a n d p e e r s I m a d e s o m e o f m y b e s t f r i e n d s w h i l e c ove r i n g t h e m ov i e b e a t
( s t i l l t r y i n g t o m a t c h yo u f o r p ro l i f i c n e s s , Za c h Za h o s ’ 1 5 , a n d yo u f o r e n t h u s i a s m , Se a n Do o l i t t l e ’ 1 6 ) a n d g o t t o p a r t i c i p a t e i n s o m e t h i n g ve r y s p e c i a l
So m e h i g h l i g h t s f o r m e i n c l u d e m y i n t e r v i e w s w i t h
Pa u l Ve r h o e ve n d u r i n g m y s o p h o m o re ye a r, w i t h s e ve r a l e m p l oye e s o f Pi x a r A n i m a t i o n St u d i o s w h o a re a l u m s a n d w i t h R a c h e l R e i c h m a n , t h e e d i t o r o f
Hi t c h c o c k / Tr u f f a u t , t h i s Ma rc h Eve n t h o u g h t h e a r t s s e ct i o n i s n o t w i t h o u t i t s p ro b l e m s ( we g o t t a w o rk o n b e e fi n g u p o u r t o p t e n l i s t s , g u y s ) I n e ve r t h e l e s s e n j oye d
s e l e c t i n g t e n g e m s i n e a c h c a t e g o r y a t t h e e n d o f e ve r y ye a r It’s a n e f f i c i e n t w a y t o c a n o n i ze a n d q u a n t i f y w h a t yo u r f a vo r i t e a r t i s t i c e x p e r i e n c e s o f t h e ye a r we re , w h e n o f c o u r s e s u c h a t a s k i s i m p o s s i b l e My b i g g e s t W T F m o m e n t c a m e l a s t Nove m b e r w h e n Ne i l l Bl o m k a m p, d i re c t o r o f D i s t r i c t 9 , s e n t a n e m a i l t o m e a s k

h i n k a b o u t i s t o n o t u n d e r m i n e t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f k e e p i n g t h e a r t s a l i ve a n d we l l h e re o n c a m p u s In a s c h o o l w h e re i n d e e d e ve r y s t u d y i s a va i l a b l e i n t h e h i g h e s t p o s s i b l e f a s h i o n , a n d e ve r y w h e re yo u t u r n yo u m e e t a d i f f e re n t m a j o r, d i s c u ss i o n t o p i c s a re n o n e t h e l e s s d o m i n a t e d by t h e h a rd s c ie n c e s : b i o l o g y, e n g i n e e r i n g , a n i m a l s c i e n c e , p h y s i c s , c h e m i s t r y It’s o u r re s p o n s i b i l i t y a s a r t s w r i t e r s t o k e e p t h e h u m a n i t i e s a l i ve a n d we l l h e re , a n d I h a ve n o d o u b t t h a t a s l o n g a s t h e re i s a c a m p u s u p h e re i n It h a c a t h e re w i l l b e a s t ro n g ve r ve f o r t h e h u m a n i t i e s , b u t i t o n l y e x i s t s a s l o n g a s t h e e n t h u s i a s m d o e s , t o o T h e re w a s a ve r y g o o d a r t i c l e p u b l i s h e d a ro u n d t h e e n d o f l a s t s e m e s t e r e n c o u r a g i n g a l l s t u d e n t s t o m a k e t i m e i n t h e i r l i ve s f o r t h e h u m
I n s p i r a l i n g
R e s o l v e Y o u r s e l f
E l e c t r i c B u f f a l o R e c o r d s





Shay Collins
Released with minimal hype by Electric Buffalo Records at the end of a blustery April, Resolve Yourself, the first release from Inspiraling (aka Gil Israel ’16), seems far divorced from landlocked Ithaca The album occupies a beachy vein that tenuously falls under the surf-rock heading, but mostly rides its marriage of keyboards and hazy guitars into a nebulous realm Few of Resolve Yourself’ s tracks channel powerful momentum Rather, they slowly drift along like musings from a lazy, sun-drenched afternoon
Resolve Yourself resembles early releases from slackerrocker Mac DeMarco Although Inspiraling does not share DeMarco’s propensity for composing around guitar, both artists favor eerie, understated tracks that imbue the listener with a strain of relaxation cut with unease A slightly anxious malaise marks Inspiraling’s thoughts on sleepiness and stilted romance that parallel DeMarco’s melancholy and worries about lost youth Yet, while DeMarco’s tracks play like send-offs from a monotone beach, Inspiraling’s hail from a musical elsewhere
Specifically, Resolve Yourself’ s instrumental tracks wander into a field of sprawling ideas and raw sonic material that somewhat resembles the collages of German experimental rockers Faust On the album’s fourth track, “You Know Me,” jazzy drums pass through, synths flit in and out and a strange rustle simmers just beneath the surface Unlike the work of instrumental mainstay Ratatat, Inspiraling foregoes a conspicuous verse-chorus division in order to promote a feeling of indefinite suspension
Resolve Yourself’ s instrumental tracks have the potential to stretch out for hours, caught in a gleaming amber, bur Inspiraling caps them all under five minutes
“Mindfulness,” Resolve Yourself’ s antepenultimate track and third instrumental song displays Inspiraling’s most interesting composing and recording For four and a half minutes, he offers slight alterations on the track’s
O O O O O O O O O O O O O
T E S T S P I N S
n e w a n d n o t a b l e
main theme, constantly reworking the different nooks and crannies of a hazy realm A multitude of instruments take their time in the foreground After a brief synth intro, Inspiraling tosses in a straight snare-bass-snarebass drum part that breaks from the understated funk drumming that dominates most of the album A perpetually moving bass line and a smorgasbord of synths fill out a soundscape in which every part is always in the same neighborhood, but never locked into one restrictive groove
Inspiraling’s instrumental tracks, however, constitute less than a fifth of Resolve Yourself and intersperse lyrical songs that attain varied levels of success The entirety of Inspiraling’s release has a purposeful lo-fi vibe, and many of Inspiraling’s tracks play far more like demos than fully fleshed out products This still-in-production aesthetic in fact propels a number of the album’s most compelling songs
Despite Inspiraling’s propensity for slathered synths and thick hazes, Resolve Yourself’ s simplest tracks are its m o s t c o m p e l l i n g Sa ve f o r a f e w s y n t h s we l l s , “Exhausted” features a minimal beat, plucky guitars, understated bass and a clean piano line that accentuates Israel’s vocals Israel’s voice has an unmistakable nasal twang that allows him to deliver his simple lyrics with a straightforward, unremarkable delivery
Resolve Yourself’ s standout track “Dangerous Machine” deftly fuses Inspiraling’s quirks (simple but odd lyrics, understated guitar and bass lines, lo-fi production) into a whole that transcends its parts None of “Dangerous Machine”’s elements are captivating on their own but, when taken as a unit, the track mesmerizes Despite the album’s presiding surfer tone, “Dangerous Machine” has a distinctly grunge core that is undoubtedly bolstered by Israel’s deadpan delivery of earnest lines At the end of one verse, Israel croons about his desire “ to
be the person with no fear/always liked by all those near ” Many of Resolve Yourself’ s tracks, however, seem underdeveloped rather than brooding and subdued “Right Before You,” for example, channels a few funk and soul motifs, but falls flat without any palpable energy driving the song The same issue plagues earlier tracks “Breeze” and “The Reach ” None of Inspiraling’s songs are failures per se, and rarely does Israel noticeably flub a part, but the majority of Resolve Yourself’ s tracks play like demos rather than finished songs As such, it is difficult to figure out exactly how to evaluate Resolve Yourself As a collection of demos, it’s an excellent release that plays like an exposition of the tools in Inspiraling’s camp: proficiency holding down the bass and drums, a good ear for simple, straightforward guitar and piano lines and a rich library of interesting synths As a finished product, however, the album fails to deviate from a lackluster center The majority of the tracks sound like skeletons that provide a basic structure and a few interesting textures or riffs to distinguish one song from the next Inspiraling seems to have halted after this first step, however, and neglected to imbue any of his tracks with visceral energy
It is important to note and respect, however, that Electric Buffalo Records and Inspiraling released Resolve Yourself with considerably less hype than ’ s
Paralanguage release a few weeks prior, and the album s h o u l d p e r h a p s b e c o n s i d e re d a n i n t ro d u c t i o n t o
Inspiraling’s ideas rather than a full realization of them
If thought of as a teaser for future projects, Resolve Yourself is an exciting project Inspiraling’s lo-fi production, understated lyrics and hazy ethos are all elements that, if pushed further, could lead to excellent, interesting songs
Shay Collins is a sophomore in the College of Arts and Sciences
He can be reached at scollins@cornellsun com
BY TUSHAR THOMAS Sun Contributor
The Noise of Time is a novel of threes It begins with three mysteriously unnamed characters meeting on a train platform, and it is parted into three sections Each of these sections is allocated a different setting the lobby just outside two elevator doors, a plane seat and a car seat In each of these sections, the main character never moves Instead, he reflects With The Noise of Time, we get ManBooker-Prize-Winner Julian Barnes’ go at historical fiction Barnes’ figure-of-choice for his book’s spotlight is Dmitri Dmitrievich Shostakovich a scrawny, introverted Russian composer who composed music during the twentieth century ’ s era of Soviet oppression The Noise of Time is, most of the time, wonderfully introspective Shostakovich, as Barnes paints him, is a nervous man In the entire first part of the novel, he remains seated before elevator doors in the middle of the night and anxiously recalls key moments of his life He is certain that the
Soviet government (or, as he ominously calls it, “Power”) is coming for him He doesn’t want the officers to wake his family, so each night, he dresses up and waits by the elevator We wait alongside him, listening to the running of his thoughts We get regaled with tales of his shifting life philosophies, failed love affairs and Russian politics, all of which are fascinating
In the second and third parts, the meditations and reflections go on, but the focus shifts more to politics Shostakovich is constantly at odds with Power, it seems and to something called “the noise of time ” Barnes’ Shostakovich philosophizes (and, sometimes, it seems the philosophizing has no end) on the nature of great music He believes that, like all art, only some music will survive time The rest will be forgotten He seems obsessed (and it seems most artists are) with trying to figure out what survives “the noise of time” and what doesn’t In a very literar y fashion, Shostakovich’s obsessions become prosaic and melodramatic at points Now and then, they become gimmicky occasionally, though, they are moving

The formatting is designed to reflect the jumpiness of Shostakovich’s thoughts Each of the three parts is broken into a large number of smaller sections that each average approximately half of a page in length
Often, the bits are only related tangentially
The effect is that, on one page, Shostakovich’s relationship with his mother is being laid out in detail, then, a mere page later, his ideas on music are being explained The grander effect is a feeling that we have been thrown earnestly into Shostakovich’s mind, and we are being exposed to all of its naked unsteadiness Though odd and unnerving at first (as I imagine hearing someone ’ s thoughts should be), there’s a certain charming flow to it
The Noise of Time is worth a read, and it’s short This novel of threes comes full circle in order to end the way it begins: with its three unnamed characters huddled together on a train station platform
Tushar Thomas is a junior in the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences He can be reached at tt465@cornell edu
n c e a g a i n i t ’ s t h e m o n t h o f Ma y, a n d t h e we a t h e r i s ( s o r t o f ) s t a r ti n g t o s e e m s e r i o u s a b o u t g e t t i n g w a r m Fo r m e , a s f o r m o s t C o r n e l l s t ud e n t s , t h i s i n d i c a t e s a n u m b e r o f e xc i t i n g t h i n g s Sl o p e Da y i s i m m i n e n t , a n d s u m -
m e r i s i n u n d e r a m o n t h In b e t we e n t h e m , i n n u m e r a b l e h o u r s w i l l b e s p e n t i n t h e l i b r a r y T h e re w i l l b e s l e e p l e s s n i g h t s a n d p o s s i b l y t e a r s T h e re w i l l b e t i m e s w h e n o u r d r i ve t o w o rk i s c h a ll e n g e d by a b e a u t i f u l m o r n i n g , o r t h e w a r m b r e e z e o f a n e a r l y s u mm e r ’ s a f t e rn o o n , r e m i n di n g u s t h a t f o r a l l o f o u r g o a lo r i e n t e d n e s s t h e r e i s a f a r g r e a t e r j o y i n s i m p l y b e i n g H o p e f u l l y t h o u g h , we’l l g e t e ve r y t h i n g d o n e , a n d a l l w i l l b e re w a rd i n g Fo r m e t h e w a r m we a t h e r a l s o i n d ic a t e s t h a t I ’l l a g a i n b e l i s t e n i n g t o a l t - J ’ s An Awe s o m e Wa ve Eve r y s p r i n g , t h i s 2 0 1 2 p o p a l b u m i n v i t e s m e b a c k i n t o i t s w a s h o f e x u b d d t i c l y r i c i s m , o f f a n t a s y w f a n t a s y w o r l i n w h i c h a l l o f m y e x i s t e n t i a l q u a n d a r i e r e a l l y c o u l b e r e s o l v w i t h a t a b

e d g e l e s s a n d c o m m e rc i a l T h e a s s u m pt i o n i s t h a t M O R m u s i c i s f u n d a m e n t a ll y va p i d a n d n o t t o b e a p p re c i a t e d a s a r t a s m u c h a s m u z a k T h u s , f o r a b a n d l i k e
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v i e w t h e b a n d Ev i d e n t l y t h e p u b l i c at i o n s re g a rd s t h e n o t i o n t h a t a l t - J f i t s i n t o t h e s a m e i n n o v a t i v e g r o o v e a s R a d i o h e a d , t h e i r f a vo r i t e b a n d o f a l l t i m e , a s n e a r - b l a s p h e m y In t h e An Wa ve re v i e w Sn a p e s c o na t t h e R a d i o h e a d c o ma s we l l a s a l t - J ’ s w i n n i n g s t e e m e d Me rc u r y Pr i ze , a
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g o i n g b a c k t o a l t - J i s t h e p a r t o f m e t h a t , ove r t h e p a s t f e w m o n t h s , h a s c o m e t o l ove a n o l d e r b a n d t r a d i t i o n a l l y o u t r i g h t re j e c t e d by a l t e r n a t i ve m u s i c s c e n e s : T h e E a g l e s If a l t - J ’ s c a rd i n a l s i n w a s b e i n g
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L S D , a n d w s e x c o u l d b a n e x t e n s i o n l y s e r g i c i n n e ( “ i n yo u r s n p l e a s u re , ” s i n m a n Jo e Ne w m a n , “ b r o o m - s h a p e d p l e as u re ” ) An Awe s o m e Wa ve i s a g u i l t y p l e as u re , a n d a d i s t i n c t l y s u m m e r y o n e A s i n d i e b a n d s g o , a l t - J a re n o t a b l y u n c o o l T h i s i s owe d l a r g e l y t o t w o p u ni s h i n g re v i e w s g i ve n by Pi t c h f o rk Me d i a t o b o t h An Awe s o m e Wa ve , a n d i t s f o l l ow u p T h i s i s Al l Yo u r s Wr i t i n g a b o u t t h e f o r m e r, re v i e we r L a u r a Sn a p e s d i s m i s s e d t h e b a n d’s s o u n d a s “ k n o t t y ” a n d “ i n c o ng r u o u s ” c o n c l u d i n g t h a t a l t - J ’ s m a i n c l a i m f o r i n n ova t i o n o n t h e a l b u m “ i s t h a t t h e re ’ s a l o t g o i n g o n ” It’s h a rd n o t t o s u s p e c t , t h o u g h , t h a t s o m e o f
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“ Pe a c e f u l E a s y Fe e l i n g , ” e x p l a i n i n g t o h i m b l u n t l y : “ Ma n , c o m e o n I h a d a ro u g h n i g h t , a n d I h a t e t h e f u c k i n g
E a g l e s , m a n ” T h e o c c a s i o n a l d e f e n s e o f t h e E a g l e s w h i c h c a n b e f o u n d a m i d s t t h re e d e c a d e s
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f yo u j u s t o p e n yo u r m i n d a n d j u s t e m b r a c e t h e w h o l e t h i n g Yo u m i g h t a t f i r s t n o t l i k e p a r t o f i t a n d yo u ’ re l i k e ‘ t h i s i s p re t t y b a d , ’ b u t t h e n yo u d i s c ove r t h i s s o n g t h a t ’ s a m a zi n g a n d t h e n a f t e r a w h i l e yo u j u s t e m b r a c e t h e c h e e s y p a r t s t o o a n d i t ' s l i k e a e u p h o r i c f e e l i n g ” My s e n t i m e n t s a b o u t a l t - J a n d t h e E a g l e s i s q u i t e s i m il a r I t a k e t h e e u p h o r i c f e e l i n g h e t a l k s a b o u t t o b e t h e s e n s e t h a t re c l a i m i n g a d i s m i s s e d b a n d i s a c re a t i ve a c t i n i t s e l f : t h e f e e l i n g t h a t yo u yo u r s e l f a re f i n d i n g s o m e t h i n g i n t h e m u s i c t h a t h a s b e e n f o r g o t t e n , o r p e r h a p s w h i c h w a s n e ve r f o u n d i n t h e f
o f d e t r a c t i o n s t e n d t o f o c u s o n t h e f a c t t h a t , a t t h e e n d o f t h e d a y, t h e y u n d e n ia b l y w ro t e t i g h t , m e l o d i o u s p o p s o n g s I w o u l d a g re e w i t h t h i s a s s e s s m e n t , b u t i t i s f a r l e s s re l e va n t t o m e t h a n t h e s i m p l e f a c t t h a t t h e E a g l e ’ s s o we l l c a p t u re d a c e r t a i n s u n n y L A a e s t h e t i c L i k e a l t - J , u s i c d e s c r i b e s i d y l l i c w o r l d a n d a m e ll ow i d e a l : a p i c t u r e w h i c h s e e m s a s s t u p i d a s i t s i n v i t i n g Sp e a k i n g o n e Bre t E a s t o n i s Po d c a s t i n 4 , a c c l a i m e d e a r t i s t Ku r t r e f l e c t e d o n n s p i r a t i o n h e f r o m s o f tR a n d y Ne w m a n a n d B o b Se e g e r : “ s o m e p e o p l e j u s t l i k e t h e c r i ti c a l l y a c c l a i m e d re c o rd s a n d t h e n o n c e s o m e b o d y g e t s a l i t t l e b i t c h e e s y t h e y j u s t c a n ’ t d e a l w i t h i t b u t , l i k e , t

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l e f t - b a c k p o s i t i o n , b u t I w o u l d d i s a g re e a n d s u g g e s t Cre s s we l l h a d t h e b e t t e r c a m p a i g n a n d d e s e r ve d t h e f i r s t
t e a m s l o t
R i g h t M i d f i e l d : M a r k o A r n a u t o v i c , S t o k e C i t y
T h e g i a n t Au s t r i a n p u t t o g e t h e r t h e b e s t g o a l s c o r i n g c a m p a i g n i n St o k e h i s t o r y t h i s s e a s o n , s c o r i n g 1 1 g o a l s a n d c h i p p i n g i n f i ve a s s i s t s W h i l e e n e m y d e f e n s e s h a ve
f o c u s e d i n o n St o k e ’ s m o re we l l - k n ow n p l a ye r s l i k e
X h e rd a n Sh a q i r i o r B o j a n K rk i c , A r n a u t ov i c h a s b e e n a b l e t o s h i n e L e i c e s t e r ’ s R i y a d Ma h re z , t h e P FA Pl a ye r o f t h e Ye a r, w a s s e l e c t e d f o r t h e Te a m o f t h e Se a s o n
Kevin Linsey can be reached at klinsey@cornellsun com
T h e C o r n e ¬ D a i l y S u n

By KEITH BOLLT Sun Staff Writer
Cornell equestrian placed seventh overall in its first ever appearance at the Intercollegiate Horse Show Association Nationals in Louisville this weekend
Throughout the season, head coach Joanne Novakovic ’03 guided her team to several top ten individual results to cap off the best season in the program ’ s 21-year history
According to Novakovic, Cornell has been very close to making nationals before, but the Red competes in a very tough region, which has barred success in recent years She is very happy with how her team did, especially considering it was their first time together on such a big stage
“I think we had a really solid performance, ” she said “We had riders in the top ten for five out of the eight chases ”
Novakovic praised sophomore Caroline Boozer for her performance and second place finish in the Collegiate Walk Trot
“It was really awesome, ” Boozer said of going to Louisville and taking second “We all did really well
”
Senior Meridith Meyer feels reaching Nationals and performing strongly is a testament to what goes on behind the scenes dur-
ing practice and a general team effort
“It speaks to the program and all the hard work that the team has put in,” she said “Just being able to compete with those athletes was an incredible opportunity ”
Meyer, who earned honorable mention in Open Flat, felt that the entire team excelled She was especially impressed with the way the first-time riders handled the pressure that is inherent at an event of such magnitude “Everyone stepped up in their own way, ” she said
Boozer pointed out that Cornell had an opportunity to compete with athletes and teams from across the country that they do not usually encounter She also enjoyed being around the Western National Championships, which was going on at the same time
“It was really neat, ” Boozer said “There were all these teams from all over the country ”
For Meyer and the other six seniors, Louisville was the end of the road in their collegiate equestrian careers
“It was emotional for them,” Novakovic said “It was a good way for them to go out ”
Team members say they will miss the leadership and companionship of the graduating seniors
“They are all amazing riders and amazing
people,” Boozer said “We will miss them a lot ”
Meyer was emotional when reflecting on her time in the program and will keep with her all the lessons she has learned through her time at Cornell
“I gave the program everything I had to give and the program [gave me back a lot in return],” Meyer said
Novakovic said she is excited for what the future holds for a team that has now has experience at a more competitive level She feels that her own ability to assemble a championship-caliber team with experience gained by returning riders will only help the Red’s chances going forward
“I think we have a better sense of exactly what it takes,” she said “I definitely think we can repeat this Every year, we are going to have a chance to make it there ”
Boozer is as optimistic as her coach about what a landmark 2015-16 season means for the future of the program The confidence level of the team this year will prove to be an asset going forwards
“We proved ourselves this year, ” she said “We are going to keep moving up the ranks ”

COURTESY OF CORNELL ATHLETICS
The best yet | Cornell equestrian had its best finish in its 21-year history
With just one week re m a i n i n g i n t h e En g l i s h Pre m i e r League season, thoughts turn to recapping the year The Pro f e s s i o n a l Fo o t b a l l e r s ’

A s s o c i a t i o n h a s a l re a d y announced the PFA Team of the Season, which contains the best player at each position, in its opinion Due to the size of the Premier League, however, a number of outstanding performers are not recognized for their stellar seasons This column will contain my “Second Team of the Season,” or those who deserve recognition for a solid year and just missed out on the PFA’s team
Goalkeeper: Heurelho Gomes, Watford
SHATZMAN
Continued from page 16
analyzed executives, coaches, teams, and so on I’ve been right sometimes and wrong a lot That’s life
I ’ m n o t g o i n g t o g o Cu b a Goodling ’97 Oscars here, but I want to acknowledge the Sun staff former and current for all that they do Haley, Scott, Anna, Adam, Joon, and all others: I appreciate you To anyone who read any piece of mine: thank you
A professor once told me that I received a grade on an essay because he followed my column and felt that I was capable of better It feels good when people take interest in your work I have learned plenty during my time at Cornell It’s hard not to worr y about what has yet to occur There will be highs and there will be lows Be k i n d t o a l l T h i n g s w i l l w o rk
Ben Shatzman can be reached at bshatzman@cornellsun com This is the final installment of Calling the Shatz
Kevin Linsey
The Beautiful Game
on numerous occasions and s
2015-16 campaign The stepup on Gomes was Manchester United’s David De Gea, who was far and away the league’s best goalkeeper deserves the PFA award
Right-Back: Craig Dawson, West Bromwich Albion
The Baggies right-back has scored four goals this season and kept ten clean sheets, starting every league match in t h e p ro c e s s Da w s o n h a s helped West Brom maintain a
See LINSEY page 14
A number of goalkeepers merit consideration for this t e a m A r s e n a l’s Pe t r C e c h , Stoke City’s Jack Butland and L e i c e s t e r C i t y ’ s K a s p e r Schmeichel are all solid candidates, yet Gomes has earned it He has bailed out Watford
tallying up from there,” Durant said Junior Austin Jamerson defended his decathlon title with well over 7000 points, and senior Max Hairston won the 110 meter hurdles, which comes off the heels of his 60 meter win in February Hairston also took second in the 400 meter hurdles, falling just 03 seconds off the mark His performance came as no surprise to the team
“Max is an MVP,” Durant said “He does what he does, and he’s been dominant in hurdles for years ”
Another key to first place was the 200 meter dash, where Cornell picked up 22 important points Senior Larr y Gibson and freshmen
a senior,” Durant added Ben Rainero picked up right where he left off on Saturday’s 10K win, winning Sunday’s 5K as well He became the first man to win both the 5K and 10K in the same Heps meet since 2006 Rainero credits new habits this year to his success this competition
“[In addition to weight training], I made sure to change my eating habits as well,” he said “At night, I mostly eat beets now, along with a kale smoothie Apparently beets have a great effect on your endurance I don’t know the science behind it, but you can ’ t argue with the results ”
Winkler was named the meet ’ s field MVP, while teammate Rainero took home the honor of track MVP Rainero was pleased with the award, but felt it was a distant second to the overall team accomplishment
“It was really special to win with a record 211 points,” he said “I’m proud of everyone for stepping up this weekend The track MVP I guess is a nice bonus ”
“Apparently beets have a great effect on your endurance. I don’t know the science behind it, but you can’t argue with the results.”
Zach Menchaca and Alex Beck took first, second and fourth, respectively, in an impressively fast race
Gibson teamed up with sophomore Michael Smith and juniors Wynn Curtis and Tobe Attah a staff writer for The Sun to beat out the rest of the field in the 4X400 meter relay The win marked Gibson’s second of the day, who made the most of his last collegiate competition
“Larry has been an amazing part of the leadership of this team, and that’s a great way to go out as
B e n R a i n e r o
Another source of points came from several competitors who have battled their way through serious injuries in their past Senior Rob Robbins still fresh off a two year absence due to injury placed first in the javelin, throwing just under 74 meters, and Junior Bobby Plummer who some thought might never jump again after a foot injury won the triple jump in what was yet another Red victory
Even though the Red took avenged its second place finish to Princeton’s in Febr uar y, Rainero believes that the win speaks to its current standing within the Ivy League
“This Heps felt like redemption in a way, but it was more than that,” he said “It was proof that this is the best track team that’s ever been at Cornell ” Cornell will return to Princeton to participate in regional IC4A Championships this coming weekend, and several athletes who have already qualified will compete in NCAA’s in Jacksonville, Florida beginning May 25
Cornell also took first and tied for second in the high jump, as sophomore Myles Lazarou narrowly beat out three other competitors, including Cornell senior Stephen Afadapa, who tied for second with two other jumpers
Charles Cotton can be reached at ccotton@cornellsun com

By CHARLES COTTON Sun Staff Writer
An entire season ’ s hard work finally paid off this weekend when the Cornell men ’ s track and field team took first place in the Ivy League Outdoor Heptagonals at Princeton
The outdoor championship improves upon a February second place finish at home during the indoor heps Knowing they were close to gold last time around, the team traveled to Princeton with one hope: to dethrone the defending champion in the Tigers on their home turf and notch those crucial points that will propel them to first
“After losing indoor, everybody on the team felt that we needed to come here and win,” head coach Adrian Durant said “We had a strategy in mind, and it worked out Everybody showed up ”
The Red accomplished this and more, pummeling Princeton who finished second by an impressive 54 points Cornell’s 211 point total is the most in the meet ’ s history
Despite being the first squad to ever reach the 200-point plateau, their goal was just to win, not shatter records, but the team is more than happy to accomplish both
“Our goal was not to break that record, it was to win,” Durant added “I would’ve been happy winning by one point or a half a point ”
Senior Ben Rainero noted how Cornell and Princeton swapped roles after the competition moved outdoors when
By BRITTANY BIGGS Sun Staff Writer
In an Ivy League showdown, the Cornell women ’ s track and field team was able to secure a third place team finish this past weekend in the Ivy League
H e p t a g o n a l Championships The Red finished behind Princeton and Harvard, scoring 107 points over the two-day event
women are moving in the right direction We have a lot of freshman doing amazing things We went from getting fifth last year to third this year I think a lot of that had to do with the depth of the throwing squad this year ” Freshman Autumn Covington described being surrounded by energy on the eventful day
“The energy throughout this weekend was full of enthusiasm and confidence on the track ”
A u t u m n C o v i n g t o n
Top per formances on the track came from senior Caroline Kellner, who won the 10K and classmate Camr yn Goodman, who impressed with a second place finish in the discus Along with the pair of seniors, junior Adrian Jones fought through to a second place finish in the 200 meters
After a long year of strong numbers from all parts of the team, members of the Red said they were proud of the growth the team has made over the hard fought 2015-16 campaign
“Heps is always the craziest meet of the year, ” Goodman said “It’s so full of excitement and energy and emotions The Cornell
“I would describe this outdoor Heps as unforgettable,” said freshman Autumn Covington “ The energy throughout this weekend was full of enthusiasm and confidence on the track, the field and in the stands ” Covington was able to excel with a fifth place finish in the Hammer throw
“Going into my event I felt the initial nerves, but as the competition continued and the cheers of my teammates got louder, I was able to breathe and throw a PR to contribute to my team, ” Covington said “We all fed off each other’s energy, which ultimately strengthened our abilities to compete and come out with a third place finish in the Ivy Championships ” In February, the women placed second at indoor Heps Despite the regression from the year ’ s other championship, Covington and the Red are coming out with their heads held high
“I’m so proud of each
and every athlete who came out and showed the other schools what being a part of a team is tr uly about,”
Covington said “Cornell definitely stood out in terms of achievement, class and supportive fans With this having been my first outdoor Heps, I couldn’t have asked for a greater result or better teammates and coaches to end this season with ”
The ECAC Championships will be held this weekend for athletes who have earned a spot this season to compete with other top athletes Following the ECAC
Championships is the NCAA Championships and then a long offseason The Red hopes to dig in during the summer and come back even stronger for next year
“Going for ward, I will continue to train over the summer and come back next season with an even greater goal,” Covington said “I believe in myself and my team to become He p s c h a m p i o n s n e x t year indoor and outdoor ”

compared to the indoor heps in Barton Hall
“This time, everyone really came in hungry, and stepped it up the way Princeton did indoors,” he said
Cornell started off competition Saturday in an impressive fashion Junior Rudy Winkler surprised no one by winning the hammer throw His throw of over 246 feet is currently good enough for best in the entire country
Along with Winkler, Rainero took first in the 10K, marking Cornell’s second individual win of the day Several other top five finishes put the Red in good position entering Sunday, who continued its impressive start by reaching the finals in 17 events on day two
“The guys did an excellent job on day one positioning themselves to score on day two, ” Durant said
The Red found themselves in a similar position during Indoor Heps, but “fell apart ” on the all-important day two, Durant said This weekend, though, they viewed the second day as a fresh start, which was a big factor in their first place finish
“This time around we treated day two as a blank slate,” Durant said “it was just another chance to compete hard ”
An impressive eight additional individual victories in the 17 events put Princeton away, and Cornell cruised to the victory
“The guys were fired up, and at some point on Sunday, the momentum went in our favor and the points just kept
M TRACK page 15
Thus begins my final column for The Cornell Daily Sun It’s the last hurrah Game seven The finale He shoots, he scores They’ll be telling their grandkids about this one
I’m only kidding I began writing a weekly column in the fall of 2013, my first semester at Cornell I was a transfer-sophomore who thought ordering pizza bagels at CTB after midnight was badass Now a senior, I know that to be fact

I don’t recall how the “Calling the Shatz” moniker came about I think my parents may have suggested it My last name is pronounced “shotsman, ” but all of my friends back home call me “Shatz” (rhymes with cats), and once I started saying “Shatz-man,” it became a habit that I couldn’t kick So “Calling the Shatz” is the true pronunciation of my name, and when I see it in the paper I am reminded that I constantly mispronounce my own last name
And so it goes
Calling the Shatz
The late Kurt Vonnegut ’44 wrote for this very paper in the early 1940’s I skimmed through The Sun’s archives the other day and found some of his work Man, he was special: articulate, smart, witty, funny He had it all, years before the world outside of Cornell would grow to adore him I take pride in continuing a tradition that once included Kurt Vonnegut Among my favorite passages of his is the following:
“Hello babies Welcome to Ear th It’s hot in the summer and cold in the winter It’s round and wet and crowded On the outside, babies, you ’ ve got a hundred years here There’s only one r ule that I know of, babies ‘God damn it, you ’ ve got to be kind ’”
Over the last three years, I have tried to write compelling pieces, often on athletes who I feel are unfairly scrutinized by the media people from R i c h a rd Sh e r m a n t o Jo s h Go rd o n , Ha s s a n Whiteside to DeMarcus Cousins I have enjoyed digging for statistics to back my arguments I have