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WHEN THERE IS CRISIS STUDY GUIDE For Personal Reflection & Group Discussion
RACHEL MEDEFIND & JASON JOHNSON with contributions from Megan Timberlake
When There Is Crisis Study Guide Copyright © 2026 by Christian Alliance for Orphans 6723 Whittier Avenue, McLean, Virginia All rights reserved. First edition printing & publishing 2026 in the United States. For more information, please visit cafo.org Scripture quotations are from the ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ISBN: 9798194051809 PROJECT SUPPORT Megan Timberlake, Institute for Family-Centered Healing & Health Alyssa Dunahoo, Pure Religion Project DESIGN Charity Betts EDITING / REVIEW Katie Casselberry
Notice: The research and biblical ideas shared in this resource are provided for educational and personal or family growth purposes. This resource does not provide clinical or other professional services or establish a professional-client relationship. Readers are responsible for discerning how the principles and practices offered here apply to their own circumstances.
TABLE OF CONTENTS 01
INTRODUCTION How to Use This Guide Guidance for Groups
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MODULE ONE An Invitation to Rethink Crisis
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MODULE TWO Responding When Crisis Escalates
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MODULE THREE Anchoring Practices and Considerations When Seeking Help
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MODULE FOUR A Framework for Considering Residential Care
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MODULE FIVE Brick-Laying for Future Flourishing
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MODULE SIX Relational Practices for Family Flourishing
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MODULE SEVEN Healing and Well-Being Through Basic Habits of Health
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MODULE EIGHT Cultivating Practices of the Christian Life for Flourishing
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ABOUT THE AUTHORS
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ABOUT CAFO
INTRODUCTION
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HOW TO USE THIS GUIDE This guide is designed as a working tool for foster and adoptive parents. It can be used in a parent group through a church, ministry or organization. it can also be used with your spouse or on your own. The modules can be completed in order or selected according to families’ current needs. This guide is organized into eight modules: 1. AN INVITATION TO RETHINK CRISIS 2. RESPONDING WHEN CRISIS ESCALATES 3. ANCHORING PRACTICES AND CONSIDERATIONS WHEN SEEKING HELP 4. A FRAMEWORK FOR CONSIDERING RESIDENTIAL CARE 5. BRICK-LAYING FOR FUTURE FLOURISHING 6. RELATIONAL PRACTICES FOR FAMILY FLOURISHING 7. HEALING AND WELL-BEING THROUGH BASIC HABITS OF HEALTH 8. CULTIVATING PRACTICES OF THE CHRISTIAN LIFE FOR FLOURISHING You do not need to answer every question or complete every exercise. However, the primary purpose is to help you slow down. In a season that may include distress, chaos, and a constant flurry of needs, this guide seeks to help you take time to reflect, consider what is needed and what is not, and prayerfully identify one or more next steps God may be calling you toward as you continue to lead your family.
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EACH MODULE INCLUDES: Some modules may be more immediately relevant than others. For example, if your family is experiencing an escalating crisis, Module 2, which addresses acute crisis, may be a good beginning point. If your family is not in immediate crisis but is carrying ongoing strain, you may find the modules on family rhythms, relational practices, healthy habits, and practices of the Christian life especially useful. The other modules can be worked through later. This guide is meant to be written in and returned to over time. For couples, we recommend that each spouse has a separate copy. Your notes, prayers, questions, and commitments become part of your own story and your Christward growth.
CONNECT AND SHARE a moment to draw
OPENING PRAYER a brief prayer to begin with
the group together
attention to God
SCRIPTURE REFLECTION a passage aligned with the
REFLECT AND DISCUSS guided prompts to facilitate
theme for meditation
conversation
GROUP EXERCISE an exercise to begin
CLOSING PRAYER a prayer entrusting outcomes
applying the ideas
to God and seeking His help 3
AS YOU GO: SUGGESTED READING AND PRACTICES •
PERSONAL REFLECTION — questions for individual or couple reflection
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TAKE-HOME EXERCISE — an opportunity to put learnings into practice
GUIDANCE FOR GROUPS A NOTE FOR FACILITATORS Thank you for being willing to walk with families through seasons of great difficulty and pain. This study guide is designed to help small groups engage When There Is Crisis in the context of a loving Christian community. Your role is not to solve the problems families are facing or offer easy answers. Instead, your role is to provide a tool and gathering place for parents to be honest with one another, look to God for wisdom and help, encourage one another, pray together, and grow as individuals, spouses, and parents amid the difficulties they face. A good facilitator helps a group hold together several truths. In this context, here are a few important ones: •
The anguish and hurt families are facing may continue for an extended period.
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Safety and dignity must be upheld for everyone in the home.
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Each individual involved is not a problem to solve, but a person capable of learning to receive and give love.
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Growth and well-being usually come through small, repeated practices over time.
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God desires to walk closely with us through the dark valley.
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He is intent on bringing good even where evil and darkness appear to reign.
SUGGESTED GROUP COMMITMENTS At the beginning of the group, invite participants to commit to: CONFIDENTIALITY. What is shared in the group should not be repeated outside the group without permission, unless someone is at risk of harm. TENDERNESS. Families may share painful and complicated stories. We can seek to start by receiving each other as we are, resisting judgment, comparison, and quick advice. HONESTY. We will speak truthfully about difficulty, including fear, exhaustion, grief, anger, and uncertainty. CONSIDERATION. We will listen well to others and allow every participant the opportunity to contribute. HOPE. We will keep watch for signs of God’s presence and action in our lives, being intentional to name even small glimmers of goodness or growth we may observe. ACCOUNTABILITY. We will anticipate growth for all participants and encourage one another toward simple, concrete next steps to support healing and flourishing.
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HANDLING SENSITIVE SHARING Some conversations may involve marital strain, serious child behavior, reflections on residential care, safety concerns, or painful family dynamics. Facilitators should gently remind the group: •
No one should feel pressured to share more than they are ready to share.
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Couples should avoid exposing private marital conflict in ways that dishonor the other or destroy trust.
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Similarly, sharing honestly about our struggles should not include speaking in ways that communicate disrespect for our children or malign programs, organizations, or churches.
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Single parents often bear distinct challenges but also bring impressive strengths. Their needs may differ in some ways while also sharing much in common. The group can play a uniquely valuable role in their lives by offering friendship and support.
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If a situation involves immediate danger, abuse, self-harm, suicidal intent, or serious threats to others, the group should help the family seek appropriate emergency or professional support.
SUGGESTED SESSION PATHWAYS This guide is organized into eight stand-alone modules. Groups may use the guide in several ways.
OPTION 1: EIGHT-SESSION GROUP Use one module per meeting. This gives the group more time for discussion, prayer, and practice.
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OPTION 2: FIVE-SESSION GROUP Combine selected modules to move through the full guide in a shorter format: •
Session 1: Module 1
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Session 2: Modules 2–3
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Session 3: Module 4
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Session 4: Modules 5–6
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Session 5: Modules 7–8
OPTION 3: SELECTED MODULES Choose the modules most pertinent to the families in the group and leave the remaining modules as optional content for couples or individuals to complete on their own.
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Module One
AN INVITATION TO RETHINK CRISIS
Few things bring more heartache to a parent than feeling powerless to help their child thrive.
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This module helps us acknowledge the pain and complexity of what we are facing while opening ourselves to consider crisis in light of God’s goodness, expressed through His readiness to be our companion in suffering and His intention to bring good from it. Suggested Reading: When There Is Crisis, Chapters 1–2
CONNECT & SHARE As you settle into your gathering, take a few minutes to connect and share updates on life and family. To help guide this time, anyone who wishes to share can offer to the group a short response to one of the following prompts: What is one thing you are particularly grateful for right now that the group can celebrate with you? How have you seen evidence of God’s faithfulness lately? Briefly share.
What is one thing you are particularly burdened by right now that the group can prayerfully support you in? What are you believing is still true even in the midst of that burden? Briefly share.
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OPENING PRAYER Take one minute of silence before the Lord. Release distractions and burdens to Him, and invite His presence and thoughts. Then ask someone to open in prayer, or, as a group, pray as Jesus taught us: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory, forever and ever. Amen.
SCRIPTURE REFLECTION Before moving into the content, take a few minutes to sit silently with this passage. Notice a truth that seems important for the season you are in. Write it below, along with any thoughts or questions it brings to mind.
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PSALM 86:1–7 Incline your ear, O LORD, and answer me, for I am poor and needy. Preserve my life, for I am godly; save your servant, who trusts in you—you are my God. Be gracious to me, O Lord, for to you do I cry all the day. Gladden the soul of your servant, for to you, O Lord, do I lift up my soul. For you, O Lord, are good and forgiving, abounding in steadfast love to all who call upon you. Give ear, O LORD, to my prayer; listen to my plea for grace. In the day of my trouble I call upon you, for you answer me.
TRUTH I WANT TO REMEMBER:
WHAT IT BRINGS TO MIND:
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REFLECT AND DISCUSS DISCUSSION STARTER Think back to how you once imagined parenting, especially foster or adoptive parenting. What hopes or assumptions did you carry then? Which of them have exceeded your expectations in beautiful ways? Which of them feel harder to hold in light of your current reality?
Even in the middle of pain and perplexing circumstances, God intends to accomplish good. This does not mean minimizing suffering or pretending that good has already come. Instead, it involves opening our hearts to the possibility that God is present in the very place we did not want to be. What makes this hard to receive in this season, or in what ways have you experienced this?
A child is never just their challenges. They are someone who can grow, love, contribute, and be shaped by your love. What helps you recover a clearer view of your child when conflict, complexity, or fear seem to dominate?
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Even the best parenting comes with no guarantees. In the end, it’s not up to you to determine how — or even if — your child will thrive. Your role is simply to faithfully cultivate the conditions where healing and growth could happen, if and when they come. How does holding together real parental responsibility and real limits help us discern what is ours to do and what must be entrusted to God?
GROUP EXERCISE: FOUR FOUNDATIONAL QUESTIONS These questions are designed to help you rethink your child, your parenting, and your family. Whether discussing in a group or reflecting personally, spend time writing out your reflections so you can return to them later to assess growth and progress. 1. WHO IS MY CHILD? What do I need to remember about my child beyond the current struggle, behavior, diagnosis, or conflict?
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2. WHAT IS NEEDED? What does my child most need right now? In what ways can I receive them as they are? What is one way I can guide them toward growth?
3. WHAT CAN I CONTRIBUTE? Do I feel confident in the critical role I play in my child’s life as their parent? How can I grow in kind and firm authority for them?
4. WHAT CAN I EXPECT? Where do I need to let go of outcomes while still being faithful as a parent?
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CLOSING PRAYER As you close your time together as a group or in personal reflection, spend a moment praying for one another, your children, family, and homes. Leave time to share and pray for specific needs as you are able. Then, together or individually, use this prayer as a guide to close your time: Father, You are merciful and the God of all comfort. Comfort us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by You. As we share in Christ’s sufferings, through Christ let us also share abundantly in comfort. Amen. BASED ON 2 CORINTHIANS 1:3–5, ESV
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AS YOU GO: SUGGESTED READING AND PRACTICE For ongoing study and reflection, the following prompts and exercises are designed to help you engage more deeply with the principles and key ideas found in the When There Is Crisis handbook.
PERSONAL REFLECTION 1. As you reflect on the layers of influence described in Chapter 1, which ones seem to be shaping your family’s story the most right now?
2. Chapter 2 invites us to consider that God can use even unwanted suffering for good. In what ways does that feel difficult to believe right now? Where have you already seen even small evidence of God’s action within you or those in your life?
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3. Of the four foundational questions in Chapter 2, which one feels most important for you to revisit right now? •
Who is my child?
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What is needed?
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What can I contribute?
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What can I expect?
TAKE-HOME EXERCISE These small practices can become acts of faith. We do not control the outcome. But repeated actions, sustained over time, support the growth, healing, and change we desire, even before the fruit is visible. Select one practice to try before you continue, or choose your own: •
Each morning, pray Psalm 23 aloud.
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Write down one sign of goodness, provision, or growth you notice in your child or family each day.
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Set aside 3–5 minutes at the end of each day to reflect on one success and one failure in parenting, and consider with God how to continue to grow in these things.
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Before bed, ask for God’s forgiveness with assurance that He does forgive, and extend forgiveness in your heart to those who have hurt you.
I WILL TRY:
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WHAT I MAY NEED TO REDUCE OR REMOVE TO MAKE ROOM FOR THIS:
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES Printable and online resources are available under Module 1 in the When There Is Crisis Online Hub.
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PURCHASE THE FULL
When There is Crisis Study Guide.
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