בס“ד
א ט פ ח ה ע כ ע ר שבת קודש פרשת פינחס
Issue 2
מחנה גן ישראל קיץ תשע“ב Inside this issue:
How to trap a mouse without a trap
347
The real reason for pillows
931
When it’s better to stop a play in middle
8455
Ike was caught breaking Mike
718
Bog War officially banned in all camps
774
Why you should sleep 5433 on the floor outside The case of the missing volleyballs
999
Buy 2 packs of Chummus and get an exclusively free Cholentpot! Visit your local canteen
This newsletter is brought to you by the dedicated counselors of Section B+ CSZ CZG CSK
outlet for more details. Restrictions may apply. This is not a paid advertisement by Akivele’s Bagels and is the sole property of A Tefach Hecher Inc. Any similarities between this advertisement and the canteen managers sense of humor are purely coincidental.
My Boich S’Vorois Time is flying! So much is happening!
outdoor balloon Dbaga show.
The second Shabbos in camp featured the war of the century. But at the end of the day, section B+ was victorious.
Tuesday, some bunks were able to cash in their hard worked on money for tubing trips etc.
It ended off with a hilarious Shmyonke by NADDB, PAMZO, CMZ and CDZ which featured desperate measures taken by many just to join camp.
We were wondering what can be a smaller prize than a Laffy Taffy, when suddenly BIVOUAC!!!
We then watched “Halber Gebaken” a video of the case of the missing baby. NADDB, PAMZO and CDZ had the hand dryer turned into a communications device, and are still looking for the baby. Sunday the staff fasted, so it was the only day in camp we tried not to bother them too much. Every bunk had a chance to make a play, which included stories from times bygone, until the days we find ourselves in now. Monday we had an IHE juggling acrobats
Preparations began right away with an early nights sleep. The next day we packed up our belongings, after checking 61.3 times to make sure we have everything. Finally we arrived, set up our tents and played ball, while the dedicated staff grilled hundreds of hot-dogs. We sat down and ate singles, doubles triples and homeruns! This was just leading up to the grand bonfire. The entire camp sat around as one, as we sang soulful melodies
and heard stories from HCMM, LDMK and CSZ. We laughed and cried, deep into the early hours of the morning. Those who fell asleep that night, had the sounds of songs or the suspense of a story ringing in their ears. The next morning (or was it still night) we woke up and headed towards a water park! Wave pools, water slides, hot tubs and cold tubs, a refreshing time was had by all! After sleeping on the busses, we were given time to lie in bed. We are now looking forward to another amazing Shabbos in the most amazing camp there ever was and will be!
א טפח העכער
Page 2
leftover snacks the campers don’t eat. ATH: What is your favorite number? PAMZO: Sevan and foooour.
ATH: Where did you train to be Manager?
a
ATH: Did you mean seven and four?
PA
PAMZO: I started talking when I was very young. ATH: How young?
PAMZO: Say it however you want. ATH: Why seven and four?
PAMZO: I don’t remember.
PAMZO: That is how many socks I have. What did you think?
ATH: How come you never lose your voice?
ATH: I am supposed to ask the questions.
PAMZO: I eat raw eggs and the
PAMZO: Sorry, but I ask the
This week we asked the following question to 770 random campers and here are the results:
question of the day around here. ATH: Right, now let’s back to the point. PAMZO: What point? ATH: What is your favorite part of camp? PAMZO: Everything! But as you can tell I especially like the PA a lot. ATH: Any final words? PAMZO: Keep up the great work with your newsletter and always remember that Ki Heim Chayeinu V’Oirech Yameinu…. ATH: Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Help! Stop! Not again!!! PAMZO: Ki Heim V’Oirech Yameinu….
Chayeinu
What does Shmoyonke mean?
Most repeated song of
19% Throwing corn flakes
the week:
34% Staff finally acting normal 78% The same thing as Pinske Mit Sushi
“Yosef the banana man”
Science for Oholei-Torah’nicks All agree that light attracts flying insects. However some researchers at the Bee Long Overweight Winged Network otherwise known as the BLOWN, suggest that this may only be true indoors. After a series of tests, they have discovered that an insect will fly
Page 3
A letter to home
Get to know your staff You hear him when you wake up, when you go to sleep and in between. He is known as a big talker so it was no problem to get him to answer some questions.
Issue 2
indoors, even if the outdoor light is 99.3% brighter. Their research also shows that insects have a 77.0% bigger attraction to food on Friday nights. Some scientist argue that this entire research is only true until big blown up machines are
spread around the ground on a Sunday, and fresh blood is brought in, in order to deflate some of the air in the machines. Research is still being done. The final results are expected after a great money exchange is done between the fresh blood and the researchers.
Dear Mommy, and 3rd cousin Yenta Dovid, I wore my helmet to the whole bivouac, just like you told me. I'm happy I could give you so much Nachas.
Finnally! Camp hires new charter busses!
Love, Moshe Shmuel
Coming soon!
P.S. I need $omething when you come.
The bed movers were here Many are still scratching their heads, wondering why the Bed Movers Inc. were called down to camp. What is known, is that upon their arrival, they quickly realized that the beds were behind locked doors. After a few minutes of pushing and pulling, they made their way in and moved the beds. They left as quickly as they came.
you updated progresses.
as
this
story
In other news, other visitors have recently visited camp illegally, by simply sliding under the bunkhouse door.
The GM was contacted but was quickly prevented from taking any action, due to the many other physical problems still situated in the condo. We can only hope and pray for peace!
Explanations: 1) “Where is my ball!”
Some claim that after receiving a shipment of pillows from camp, the Bed Movers thought it necessary to return the favor and organize camps beds.
2) Preparing for talent
Whatever the reason may be, it is clear that camp is very grateful to them, and is planning to repay them for all their work.
down?”
The exact details of the repayment vary, we will keep
night 3) “How do I get 4) Just getting wood for the bonfire