Pope Francis and the Family
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CATHOLIC TRUTH SOCIETY publishers to the holy see
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All rights reserved. First published 2015 by The Incorporated Catholic Truth Society, 40-46 Harleyford Road London SE11 5AY Tel: 020 7640 0042 Fax: 020 7640 0046. Š 2015 Libreria Editrice Vaticana in the text. This edition Š The Incorporated Catholic Truth Society.
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ISBN 978 1 78469 090 8
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Contents Nazareth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 The Mother . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 The Absent Father . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 The Father who is Present . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 The Children . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21 Brothers and Sisters . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27 The Elderly . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31 The Grandparents . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36 The Gift of Children . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 The Sufferings of Children . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46 The Creation of Man and Woman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50 In His Own Image . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54 Marriage . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58
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The Beauty of Christian Marriage . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 63 The Three Expressions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 67 Education . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72 Engagement . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 79 Family and Poverty . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 85 Family and Illness . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89 Death . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93 Wounds . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 98 Failure of the Matrimonial Bond . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 101 Celebration . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 Work . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 108 Prayer . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 112 Evangelisation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 116 Community . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 120 Nations . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 124
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Nazareth The Synod of Bishops on the Family, recently celebrated, was the first stage of a journey, which will conclude next October with the celebration of another Assembly on the theme: “The Vocation and Mission of the Family in the Church and [Contemporary] World”. The prayer and reflection which must accompany this journey is required of all the People of God. I would also like the customary meditations of the Wednesday Audiences to be included in this common journey. I have therefore decided to reflect with you, this year, precisely on the family, on this great gift that the Lord has made to the world from the very beginning, when he entrusted Adam and Eve with the mission to multiply and fill the earth (cf. Gn 1:28); that gift that Jesus confirmed and sealed in his Gospel. The nearness of Christmas casts a great light on this mystery. The Incarnation of the Son of God opens a new beginning in the universal history of man and woman. And this new beginning happens within a family, in Nazareth. Jesus was born in a family. He could have come in a spectacular way, or as a warrior, an emperor…. No, no: he is born in a family, in a family. This is important: to perceive in the Nativity, this beautiful scene.
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Dwelling on the periphery God chose to come into the world in a human family, which he himself formed. He formed it in a remote village on the outskirts of the Roman Empire. Not in Rome, which was the capital of the Empire, not in a big city, but on its nearly invisible outskirts, indeed, of little renown. The Gospels also recall this, almost as an expression: “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?” (Jn 1:46). Perhaps, in many parts of the world, we still talk this way, when we hear the name of some areas on the periphery of a big city. And so, right there, on the outskirts of the great Empire, began the most holy and good story of Jesus among men! And that is where this family was. Jesus dwelt on that periphery for thirty years. The Evangelist Luke summarises this period like this: Jesus “was obedient to them” - that is, to Mary and Joseph. And someone might say: “But did this God, who comes to save us, waste thirty years there, in that suburban slum?” He wasted thirty years! He wanted this. Jesus’ path was in that family - “and his mother kept all these things in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature, and in favour with God and man” (Lk 2:51-52). It does not recount miracles or healing, or preaching - he did none in that period - or of crowds flocking; in Nazareth everything seemed to happen “normally”, according to the customs of a pious and hardworking Israelite family: they worked, the mother cooked, she did all the housework, ironed shirts…all the
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things mothers do. The father, a carpenter, worked, taught his son the trade. Thirty years. “But what a waste, Father!” God works in mysterious ways. But what was important there was the family! And this was not a waste! They were great Saints: Mary, the most holy woman, immaculate, and Joseph, a most righteous man…. The family. How much we can learn We are certainly moved by the story of how the adolescent Jesus followed the religious calendar of the community and the social duties; in knowing how, as a young worker, he worked with Joseph; and then how he attended the reading of the Scriptures, in praying the Psalms and in so many other customs of daily life. The Gospels, in their sobriety, make no reference to Jesus’ adolescence and leave this task to our loving meditation. Art, literature, music have taken this journey through imagination. It is certainly not difficult to imagine how much mothers could learn from Mary’s care for that Son! And how much fathers could glean from the example of Joseph, a righteous man, who dedicated his life to supporting and protecting the Child and his wife - his family - in difficult times. Not to mention how much children could be encouraged by the adolescent Jesus to understand the necessity and beauty of cultivating their most profound vocation and of dreaming great dreams! In those thirty years, Jesus cultivated his vocation, for which the Father had sent him. And in that time, Jesus
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never became discouraged, but increased in courage in order to carry his mission forward. Welcome Jesus Each Christian family can first of all - as Mary and Joseph did - welcome Jesus, listen to him, speak with him, guard him, protect him, grow with him; and in this way improve the world. Let us make room in our heart and in our day for the Lord. As Mary and Joseph also did, and it was not easy: how many difficulties they had to overcome! They were not a superficial family, they were not an unreal family. The family of Nazareth urges us to rediscover the vocation and mission of the family, of every family. And, what happened in those thirty years in Nazareth, can thus happen to us too: in seeking to make love and not hate normal, making mutual help commonplace, not indifference or enmity. It is no coincidence, then, that “Nazareth” means “She who keeps”, as Mary, who - as the Gospel states - “kept all these things in her heart” (cf. Lk 2:19, 51). Since then, each time there is a family that keeps this mystery, even if it were on the periphery of the world, the mystery of the Son of God, the mystery of Jesus who comes to save us, the mystery is at work. He comes to save the world. And this is the great mission of the family: to make room for Jesus who is coming, to welcome Jesus in the family, in each member: children, husband, wife, grandparents…. Jesus is there. Welcome him there, in order that he grow spiritually in the family.
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The Mother Today we will reflect on Mother Church. The Church is Mother. Our Holy Mother Church. In these days the Church’s liturgy sets before our eyes the icon of the Virgin Mary, Mother of God. The first day of the year is the Feast of the Mother of God, followed by the Epiphany, commemorating the visit of the Magi. The Evangelist Matthew writes: “going into the house they saw the Child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshiped him” (Mt 2:11). It is the Mother who, after giving birth to him, presents the Son to the world. She gives us Jesus, she shows us Jesus, she lets us see Jesus. Let us continue with the catecheses on the family, and in the family there is the mother. Every human person owes his or her life to a mother, and almost always owes much of what follows in life, both human and spiritual formation, to her. Yet, despite being highly lauded from a symbolic point of view - many poems, many beautiful things said poetically of her - the mother is rarely listened to or helped in daily life, rarely considered central to society in her role. Rather, often the readiness of mothers to make sacrifices for their children is taken advantage of so as to “save” on social spending.
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It also happens that in Christian communities the mother is not always held in the right regard, she is barely heard. Yet the centre of the life of the Church is the Mother of Jesus. Perhaps mothers, ready to sacrifice so much for their children and often for others as well, ought to be listened to more. We should understand more about their daily struggle to be efficient at work and attentive and affectionate in the family; we should better grasp what they aspire to in order to express the best and most authentic fruits of their emancipation. A mother with her children always has problems, always work. I remember there were five of us children at home, and while one was doing one thing, the other wanted to do another, and our poor mama went back and forth from one side to another, but she was happy. She gave us so much. Martyrdom of motherhood Mothers are the strongest antidote to the spread of selfcentred individualism. “Individual” means “what cannot be divided”. Mothers, instead, “divide” themselves, from the moment they bear a child to give him to the world and help him grow. It is they, mothers, who most hate war, which kills their children. Many times I have thought of those mothers who receive the letter: “I inform you that your son has fallen in defence of his homeland…”. The poor women! How a mother suffers! It is they who testify to the beauty of life. Archbishop Óscar Arnulfo Romero said
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that mothers experience a “martyrdom of motherhood”. In the homily for the funeral of a priest assassinated by death squads, he said, recalling the Second Vatican Council: “We must be ready to die for our faith, even if the Lord does not grant us this honour…. Giving one’s life does not only mean being killed; giving one’s life, having the spirit of a martyr, it is in giving in duty, in silence, in prayer, in honest fulfilment of his duty; in that silence of daily life; giving one’s life little by little. Yes, like it is given by a mother, who without fear and with the simplicity of the martyrdom of motherhood, conceives a child in her womb, gives birth to him, nurses him, helps them grow and cares for them with affection. She gives her life. That’s martyrdom”. Yes, being a mother doesn’t only mean bringing a child to the world, but it is also a life choice. What does a mother choose, what is the life choice of a mother? The life choice of a mother is the choice to give life. And this is great, this is beautiful. Witnesses of tenderness A society without mothers would be a dehumanised society, for mothers are always, even in the worst moments, witnesses of tenderness, dedication and moral strength. Mothers often pass on the deepest sense of religious practice: in a human being’s life, the value of faith is
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inscribed in the first prayers, the first acts of devotion that a child learns. It is a message that believing mothers are able to pass on without much explanation: these come later, but the seed of faith is those early precious moments. Without mothers, not only would there be no new faithful, but the faith would lose a good part of its simple and profound warmth. And the Church is Mother, with all of this, she is our mother! We are not orphans, we have a mother! Our Lady, Mother Church, is our mum. We are not orphans, we are children of the Church, we are children of Our Lady, and we are children of our mothers. Dearest mothers, thank you, thank you for what you are in your family and for what you give to the Church and the world. And to you, beloved Church, thank you, thank you for being Mother. And to you, Mary, Mother of God, thank you for letting us see Jesus.
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