black and pink news
art by Pete Railand, courtesy of JustSeeds
Volume 11, Issue 4
“Have a great day and if you can’t, don’t go messing up nobody else’s.” - Tabitha Brown This issue is where we are delving into self-care - not just the theory of it but creating life values that consistently uplift restoration of self. That being said, I believe that you can’t work towards long term healing and overall progress without understanding, respecting, and even appreciating the road of life you’ve already navigated. As I envision what self-care is for my Black Trans body, even with all of the access and privilege I possess, it really comes down to healing and unpacking historical trauma. Ignoring, compartmentalizing, and avoidance was a tried-and-true technique in my life. And I say that with love of who I was when that was my go-to tool of survival. I needed to protect myself because, truthfully, I felt like no one else would. The flight in me was my blanket of security. And it’s so damn easy for folks to judge your actions, right? Well, I wanted to sleep at night, so pretending I was Erica Kane or Nikki Newman was how I escaped being overwhelmed by thoughts of the sexual harm I’d experienced or my Daddy’s death. But when we know better, we do better, right? I’d like to offer an addendum to
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that age old adage: When you know better, you have the desire to do better; but when you have access and privilege you can begin to envision and build your version of “better.” Now access and privilege in this case can mean therapy, the ability to rest, or financial capabilities. I’m a living witness that the desire to be my best self has always been inside of me. When I was a poor Black child growing up in North Omaha. When I was a homeless teen. When I was in solitary confinement. When I lived in an efficiency apartment. But it was when I could have the space to not only want better, but could see what better could be. Because I witnessed it in others who looked like me or could take a vacation and write down a damn plan. Seems simple, but the barriers the oppressed in our society have to navigate creates the capacity to get through the day (on a good day). That places you in a perpetual state of survival which will always prevent the sort of environment that breeds an opportunity to thrive. So beloveds, I will share this with you: the techniques, plans and information our Newsletter team has created will be extremely helpful.
But one key ingredient will be investing in understanding fully the journey to who you are today. Because you can map out, understand and hopefully appreciate your journey thus far - mapping your journey going forward will be a breeze! (Don’t side eye me :) I mean, y’all know what I’m saying, it’ll be easier...but you’re still gonna have to work your ass off for it.) And I know inside of these prisons, jails and detention centers, it seems impossible to do this work. What I hope you take from this issue is that under the short list of what these institutions can’t take from you and that you and only you own - is your healing and your life. Take the reins. Own what belongs to you and invest the time in making it the best it can be. Mass Incarceration didn’t co-opt my greatness and it won’t have yours. Ashe’ I love you all. Be safe, take care of yourself, and anyone around you who needs it. Liberation is a team sport, my darlings. Start building your team <3 Xoxoxoxo and solidarity, Dominique Morgan She/Hers Executive Director Black and Pink, Inc Omaha, Nebraska
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In This Issue Letter from Dominique Morgan - p3 A Message From Hope by Jason Lydon - p5 Tips for Taking Care of You p7 Black Trans Women Take Care - p9 Self Care on the Inside - p10 - 11 Herbalism in Prison - p12 - 14 Your Self Care Compass - p15 - 21 Guide to Practicing Yoga p22 - 27 Journal Prompts - P28 - 31 Excerpt from Vanessa’s Zine p32 - 33 Letters from Inside Family p35 - 42 Poetry from Inside - p43 Get to Know Jasmine Tasaki p44 - 45
Cover Image by Edxie Betts, courtesy of Forward Together Inside back cover image by Emma Ismawi, courtesy of amplifier.org
Black & Pink News Black & Pink Hotline The hotline phone number is (531) 600-9089. The hotline will be available Sundays, 1-5 p.m. (Eastern Standard Time) for certain. You can call at other times, as well, and we will do our best to answer your calls as often as possible. We are sorry that we can only accept prepaid calls at this time. The purposes of the hotline are: Supportive listening: Being in prison is lonely, as we all know. The hotline is here for supportive listening so you can just talk to someone about what is going on in your life. Organizing: If there are things going on at your prison—lockdowns, guard harassment, resistance, or anything else that should be shared with the public—we can help spread the word. We look forward to hearing from you! This is our first attempt at this
JULY/AUGUST 2020 currently and formerly incarcerated people. We are outraged by the specific violence of the PIC towards LGBTQ people, and we respond through advocacy, education, direct service, and organizing. Black & Pink is proudly a family of people of all races and ethnicities. About Black & Pink News Since 2007, Black & Pink free world volunteers have pulled together a monthly newspaper, composed primarily of material written by our family’s incarcerated members. In response to letters we receive, we send the newspaper to more prisoners every month! Black & Pink News currently reaches more than 20,000 prisoners! Disclaimer The ideas and opinions expressed in Black & Pink News are solely
Give us a call! (531) 600-9089 Sundays, 1-5 p.m. EST
so please be patient with us as we work it all out. We will not be able to answer every call, but we will do our best. We apologize to anyone who has been trying to get through to the hotline with no success. We are still working out the system. Thank you for being understanding. Restrictions: The hotline is not a number to call about the newspaper. The hotline is not a number to call for sexual or erotic chatting. The hotline is not a number for getting help with your current court case; we are not legal experts. Statement of Purpose Black & Pink is an open family of LGBTQ prisoners and “free world” allies who support each other. Our work toward the abolition of the prison-industrial complex (PIC) is rooted in the experiences of
those of the authors and artists and do not necessarily reflect the views of Black & Pink. Black & Pink makes no representations as to the accuracy of any statements made in Black & Pink News, including but not limited to legal and medical information. Authors and artists bear sole responsibility for their work. Everything published in Black & Pink News is also on the Internet—it can be seen by anyone with a computer. By sending art or written work to “Newspaper Submissions,” you are agreeing to have it published in Black & Pink News and on the Internet. In order to respect our members’ privacy, we publish only first names and state locations. We may edit submissions to fit our anti-oppression values and/or based on our own editing guidelines.
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A Message Of Hope These are words we printed in the May 2017 newspaper written by our founder, Jason Lydon. These may be helpful for you to read to ground yourself and commit to practices of selfcare. “Feeling suicidal is a very common feeling behind the wall. You are not alone in that. Sometimes that can feel like the only way to have power over anything. There is no shame in having those feelings. Life can feel like too much sometimes. What I want to encourage you to do, though, is try to take some deep breaths when you’re having those moments. Try to pay attention to your breathing. Feel your feet on the floor. Try to feel your heartbeat in your chest. Try to be aware of every
feeling in your body. Even when everything around you feels terrible, your body is a miracle. Try to pay attention to the moments of life that feel good. Try to clear your mind… When that doesn’t work, it’s ok to just cry in your bunk. Push your face into your mattress. Cover yourself with your blanket. Imagine being anywhere else. Imagine a different life, one where you are free. Cry and feel angry. Try to feel all the rage in your body. Feel yourself get hot from the anger. Feel your face get wet from the tears. Know that it is ok to feel weak and broken sometimes. You are not the first one to feel this way. Life can be horrible; life is completely unfair. Each day you make a choice, a choice about living, and my hope is that even as things are so bad,
that you will keep choosing life. As part of Black and Pink, you have a family that does care what happens to you. Even if we can’t always write, even if we can’t get you free, even if we can’t make everything better or right, we care about you. We care about your life. You are valuable to us. I wish words could be more comforting. I wish I could give you a hug or hold your hand when things feel so horrible. Please know that we are fighting for a better world and that we want to end the suffering you are experiencing. We will not win soon enough. We will not make things better fast enough. We will keep fighting though. I hope you are able to keep fighting alongside us.”
image courtesy of Nicholas Lampert, justseeds.org
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Black & Pink News
NEWSLETTER NAMING CONTEST We’ve decided it’s time for a little change around here. For our 15th year, Black & Pink wants to spice things up by giving our newsletter a new name. The newsletter is by and for our Black & Pink Members. So we want to honor our members by letting you help us name it. Black & Pink will be taking submissions to the newsletter naming contest through the end of September. The people who write the top five names will be given $25. To submit, please write to Black & Pink, 6223 Maple St. #4600, Omaha, NE, 68104. Write Newsletter Name on the envelope. Please, no more than five name suggestions per envelope. Our only ask is that there are no curse words or indecent language in the name. We don’t want the newsletter returned to us or banned because the name of it is determined to be inappropriate by a jail or prison We can’t wait to see your ideas!
Quotes to Inspire Self-Care “I believe that telling our stories, first to ourselves and then to one another and the world, is a revolutionary act. It is an act that can be met with hostility, exclusion, and violence. It can also lead to love, understanding, transcendence, and community.” -Janet -Janet Mock “To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
-Oscar Wilde
“As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others.” - Maya Angelou “Knowing how to be solitary is central to the art of loving. When we can be alone, we can be with others without using them as a means of escape.” - bell hooks
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Tips for Taking Care of You We reached out to the Black and Pink family to ask: what do you do to practice self care. These are some of the responses we recieved. We’d love for you to write to us and share some of yours, too! Getting my hands in the Earth and soaking in some sunshine, writing love letters to myself and my friends to pull out on those bad days, and making sure me and all my ppl have our meds. Box breathing! (Basically inhale and count to 4, hold breath and count to 4, exhale and count to 4, hold breath and count to 4)
enough today, the rest can wait for tomorrow”
and forth gently tapping your arms and getting into a rhythm with it)
Daily meditation.
If you find yourself being overly down, find gratitude in the things you can control vs the things you can’t control Make one column with a list of things you can control and a column with things you can’t control (ex. Things I can control: My response to other people, choosing the books I read, choosing who I talk to, choosing what bedtime I have Things I can’t control: Other people’s responses, the daily schedule/lockdown times, etc.)
Honor my feelings and ask for help. Slow, deep breaths. COMMUNITY! This extrovert is healed and supported by many empathetic hands and hearts!
Meditation (the kind where you have no thoughts) is very helpful for me. It helps me to remember not to worry too much or overwork myself because I can sit still with nothing in my head for however long and I’m still fine. Mildly entertaining too for when I’m bored.
Frank Ocean, nature, stretching, and painting really helps me reconnect with myself when I feel the need to dissociate.
Water, protein, veggies, sleep, orgasms (seriously), decompression with non protest folks, binge watching stuff, music, staying away from videos of protests as it can retraumatizing, grounding, more water, more sleep.
You’ve got to give yourself space and time to process. Be honest with your heart and hold space for whatever you are feeling.
Hey! During my time in prison no matter how much went on no matter how bad it get I always looked myself in the mirror and said “just one more day” and before you knew it ten years was done! Self affirmations no matter how big or small go a long way
talking with a friend, writing down my feelings, then going back and rereading things I’ve written later on.
When my mind is racing and I’m having a hard time falling asleep, I do a body scan and I try and tell myself: “You’ve thought about
Stretching and breathing exercises to remind myself what it feels like to be present in my body—it can take care of me if I let it.
Looking at your naked body in the mirror and affirming it, feeling it, positive self talk with eye contact.
Writing letters to friends, stretching, singing to myself, doing deep belly breaths and grounding into my body imagining roots extended from my root chakra down into the Earth’s core, and stimming via the butterfly hug (crossing your arms and go back
Self care: allowing myself to halfass small or simple tasks; like only brushing my teeth for a minute instead of the full two, or setting the goal of only doing half the laundry instead of all of it. because getting shit half done is always better than not at all, no matter what anxiety tries to say! Stretching out the body, dancing by oneself, dressing up w whatever makes you feel sexy to heal dysphoria. Inspiring others to do so too and/or creating space for it! Journaling and getting feelings out thru creativity
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CALL FOR ARTISTS Sharpen your pencils, uncap your markers and get ready to go. Black & Pink wants you to get creative and help us draw our new home, Lydon House. Interested artists should create a rendering of Lydon (featured above) and mail it to Black & Pink - Lydon Art, 6223 Maple St. #4600, Omaha, NE 68104. The top 10 entries will receive $100 and will be featured in an issue for members to vote on. These drawings will be used in a number of ways but most commonly, to thank those who donate to Black & Pink. Submissions will be accepted through the end of September. Lydon is the first LGBTQ2S+ housing space in the state of Nebraska! It will be a fixture in Black & Pink’s TRANSitions program, which helps to provide safe housing and support for formerly incarcerated transgender women. Lydon House’s primary role is to serve as a community space for queer and trans people; it will also feature a library and meditation space, as well as room for therapy appointments, and office space for Black & Pink staff. staff.
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Black Trans Women: Take Care Dear Family, Black trans women and femmes around the world are fighting for the liberation of everyone while constantly being under attack from the current administration, local government, and society with little to no resources. Under so much oppression and marginalization, many of us cannot even begin to think about self-care while in constant survival mode. It is important as Black people to encourage and teach our brothers, sisters, and siblings the importance of self-care and healing and how it greatly contributes to our mental health and sustainability. The conversation and practice of taking care of yourself needs to happen, and be encouraged more open and frequently. Self-care starts with taking the time to assess your body and mind, which also means paying attention to you. Knowing your limits and setting boundaries is very important and greatly helps avoid things like burnout and compassion fatigue. For many Black trans women and femmes, setting boundaries can often be met with pushback and antiblackness which speaks to how many think that we have no right to determine who has access to our body and expertise. Creating spaces and work environments that include self-care practices and encourage the practice is crucial to the movement and fight for liberation. Basic self-care practices include things like making sure you eat,
naps, somatics, and meditation. We must be intentional about prioritizing and centering ourselves when we are exercising these practices. Turn off those cell phones, silence anything with a notification, put a do not disturb note up, and truly take the time you need but most importantly deserve. Those emails will be there, I promise. Black trans women and femmes take your time. I encourage you to create a calming ambience in your workspace or any space that you occupy. Many people including myself, use sage, oil diffusers, a variety of plants, soft music, and lighting, etc. Creating these spaces helps foster good energy and increased spiritual health. Remember that your self-care plan is specific to you and should be based on what brings you comfort, joy, and also protects your capacity. One of the best ways to recharge and unplug is by taking time off. For many of us, we feel guilty for taking extended periods of time off. Stop. We deserve time to restore, recharge, and heal. I too struggle with taking time off due to my incredible work ethic which is drenched in past experiences of joblessness and homelessness which creates fears that prevent me from wanting to consider a vacation. To claim the things we deserve we must start naming the fears we have around asking for them. We should not be afraid to ask for what we need and deserve. Self-care and centering practices
are also very important for our family that is currently incarcerated. While I have never been incarcerated and can’t speak to that experience, I do want you to know that you deserve every good thing in this world. Your humanity and respect are not up for debate under any circumstances. I recently read “Self-care On the Inside�, by The Sylvia Rivera Law Project. In this publication, they talk about the importance of breathing exercises, journaling, exercise, mediation, and outside communication via letters, etc. These practices will help ground you and keep you rooted in something that brings you joy. My heart is with you and know that one day these systems that keep us oppressed will be no longer. Beloved family, Toni Morrison reminds us that we are our best thing. To be our best selves, we must commit ourselves to practices that allow us to be well so that we can truly be that very best thing. Part of the beauty and resilience of Black people, Black trans people is our ability to show love, compassion, and grace to one another. Its time to show that same love, compassion, and grace to YOURSELF. I Love You, Mariah Moore (she,her,hers) National Organizer, Transgender Law Center Based in New Orleans, LA
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Self-Care on the Inside: Vitally Important and Hard as Hell By Alice Saphire Duchene, inside member and AC Watts, M.S. in Marriage and Family Therapy
“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” -Audre Lorde Self-care is a concept that has become so commodified in recent history that many have come to associate it more with capitalist indulgence than with meeting your basic needs. In a recent article in Omaha newspaper The Reader, community organizer Danielle Powell describes her own process of reclaiming the term and personal practice as the revolutionary act of perseverance defined by Audre Lorde. Powell had learned to associate self-care with the contradictions and violence of oppressive systems that often harm Black folks for practicing self-care and had developed a visceral reaction to mere mentions of the term. As Powell, Lorde, and many other queer and trans Black women and femmes have taught us, when it comes to surviving to fight another day in an oppressive system, self-care is vital. Self-care can be hard enough under capitalism, white supremacy, and other systems
of harm. Inside the carceral system, it can be met with seemingly endless barriers, especially for queer and trans folks. When cameras are always watching. When other inmates are waiting for you to slip up and show weakness. When COs are looking for any excuse to make your time harder. When every external action is scrutinized, how do you prioritize or create space for caring for your deepest needs? In this article, we will explore self-care through the triangular prism of mind, body, and spirit—addressing the barriers that the system creates and suggesting practices to care for yourself as an act of resistance.
Mind
We can find solace in the endless horizons of the mind. In my (ASD) nearly two decades of incarceration, I have engaged numerous tactics in honing and maintaining my mind. Reading how- to guides, taking classes, seeking out intelligent conversation, and even doodling have all helped me keep my wits. However, there are many challenges to creating and maintaining mental well-being in the carceral system.
We know from research on the effects of incarceration on mental health and well-being, that incarceration in general, and solitary confinement in particular can both create and exacerbate existing mental health issues. Many facilities limit or completely prohibit access to the tools that people might use to care for their minds. In line with Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, we are unable to attend to the care needs of our minds when our safety needs are not met. The climate of fear, vigilance, and control created by the way prisons are run is an enormous obstacle to mental well-being. How, then, can anyone care for their mind in the face of such oppression?
Create a feeling of safety
People are incredibly resilient. Even in the face of structural violence and control, we are often able to create spaces of safety within our environment or even just within ourselves. I (ACW) have been inspired by the stories of resilience and solidarity shared by people who have survived and are surviving incarceration. People find amazing and creative ways to maintain a safe space
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in an unsafe place: through relationships of mutual care, through routines and practices that cultivate wellness and normalcy, and through intentional escapism into a story or the self. I (ASD) practice mindfulness. I do what I can to cut out the external noise and seek the head space where I can reconcile my ability to control only my own actions. I remind myself what I am working towards. I try to read. I try to write. But more than anything else, I endure. There is a place of stillness deep in the center of myself where the storm can rage but I endure. My best life is yet to come if I can persist.
Create purpose
Hope is powerful, and it is driven by purpose. No purpose is too small or too simple if it keeps you going. For Alice, that has meant using her time and especially her mind productively. We had to have a conversation about what that means to her; because to me (ACW), an obsession with productivity is how capitalism keeps workers too busy and stressed to organize and fight for change. Where we found common ground was in our understanding that in a carceral system that seeks to erode the self, having purpose and intention can be a powerful way to protect the self from despair.
Body
Prison seeks to break us down, but we must persist. The
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mind dwells within the body, and so we must care for the house to keep the occupant healthy. Eating healthy whenever possible, exercising, honing motor skills through sports or even doodling, and physical practices like yoga and meditation that help create safety and purpose; can all keep the body from deteriorating. Access to basic health resources, and even quality medical care, can be seriously lacking in most U.S. prisons and jails, and at times accessing the resources that are available comes with risks. Sometimes the best someone can manage is akin to my (ASD) experience two years into a two and a half year stint in solitary where I would force myself to get up and shuffle back and forth a few times every 20 minutes or so to stop myself from sleeping during the day so I could maintain a sleep schedule. When it comes to caring for your body, do what you can. If it is safe, you can develop a relationship with your body and learn to listen to its needs. Sometimes learning to ignore the body and tune out its needs is what is necessary for survival. In that case, self-care might be better practiced as a routine or series of tasks: eat, sleep, clean, rest, move.
Spirit
In a microcosm such as prison where hugs are signs of weakness, compassion is blasphemy, and kindness can
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get you killed; protecting the spirit can be an enormous task. Whatever your religion, creed, or faith; the spirit is the binding glue of the self. Some people understand this part through the lens of their faith, others understand it as more of a humanistic idea of energy, community, and interconnectedness. When we talk about self-care of the spirit, we mean any and all of that, so long as you find it personally meaningful. In this part of the self dwells hope, motivation, and compassion. Nurture this part with whatever brings you even a small measure of joy: family, friends, books, television, animals, church, or even the simple pleasure of making another person smile. I (ASD) know that in prison religion can be synonymous with prison politics, that enjoying the antics of a sparrow can get you mocked, and that expressing joy at another’s success can destabilize your standing on the yard. Hold on. You are not alone. Where there is life, there is hope; where there is hope, there is joy.
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Getting to Know Herbal Allies by Nicole Rose, from the Solidarity Apothecary and the Prisoners Herbalism Collective When I was 21 years old, I entered one of Britain’s highest security prisons for women and began a 3.5-year prison sentence for my role in a campaign to close down an animal testing company. I was no stranger to the prison system with my first partner getting sent down at 16 years old. I was, however, expecting to be totally removed from nature. Yet even on my very first day I encountered crows sitting on the prison fences and dandelions breaking through the concrete. A couple of months into my sentence, I got a job in the prison gardens. This involved weeding and mowing grass in the small triangular prison yards. Even in these hostile environments, I was amazed by the diversity of plants I encountered. I began to read more about herbalism and got some funding to do a distance learning course in herbal medicine. My life changed forever. In 2019, I published book called the Prisoner’s Herbal that explores the medicinal uses of the common plants I found such as dandelions, nettles, chickweed and mallow. It also contains detailed descriptions of how to use things like fruits and vegetables, salt and pepper and other spices in medicinal ways which you can occasionally access in prisons. Please see the end to learn how to request a free copy of the book.
Throughout my time inside and in the ten years since of supporting friends and people in the prison system, it’s clear that medical neglect is a constant reality. My best friend had to fight for more than 2.5 years to get the cancer treatment she needed. On the wing, people would laugh at all the random leaves and roots I had drying in my cell. Yet they’d come to me and say “Nicole, can I have a few of those things you gave me for period pains?” Or “Nicole, what can I take for my headache?”. I learnt to experiment with all manner of plants, teabags and condiments I could scavenge in the prison. Partly because I knew it could take weeks to see a doctor. I smuggled dandelion leaves in my bra to eat with my bland prison food knowing they were full of vitamins and minerals. Connecting with plants in prison isn’t just about medicinal or nutritious uses - it’s about friendship. It is about contending with the isolation, despair, trauma and violence with something alive and beautiful. I slept with a dandelion root under my pillow and it made me feel less alone. During days we were locked down, I would draw herbs or read books, even dream about plants.
How do you prepare plant medicines in prison?
Most plants listed in the Prisoner’s Herbal book are edible, meaning you can safely eat them fresh. The most simple thing I often did was make a tea - simply adding herbs to a cup of hot water, letting it sit a while, and then drinking it. We didn’t have kettles for a long time, so I would infuse herbs in a flask of hot water that we were allowed in our cells. This meant the tea got really strong overnight and I’d drink it in the morning. The Prisoner’s Herbal book contains many other options for medicine making including decoctions (where herbs are boiled up in water on a stove) - something I wasn’t able to do but some prisoners can access kitchen equipment. It’s also possible to make herbal vinegars with vinegar bought on the canteen (commissary) where herbs are stored in a jar for two weeks and then strained out. The medicinal vinegar can then be added to food for extra nutrition. Other options include making eye baths or using different herbal teabags on the eyes, as well as DIY herbal foot baths if you can scavenge a big enough container. I also give examples of how to make a compress or poultice, whereby plants are prepared and applied to the skin, or where herbs are infused with water and then soaked in material and wrapped around sore joints. Herbal steams and burning herbs
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are also options. In the book, I include information on how to dry and store herbs using paper, prison radiators and sneaky storage solutions that meant everything I had dried didn’t get taken away during cell searches.
Two common plants in prison
I now want to introduce two of my favourite plants that I found growing everywhere in prison and touch on some of their medicinal properties.
juices of the digestive systems in the stomach, pancreas and liver. With help to digest our food better, dandelion can aide with constipation, gas and indigestion. The inulin in dandelion root can also help create a better balance of helpful bacteria in the gut. Dandelion’s support for the liver makes it useful for people during and in recovery from drug and alcohol use. Dandelion also has a diuretic action - this means it can increase the amount you urinate (pee) and can support people with fluid retention, such as swollen ankles. Dandelion can also help with joint pain, sprains and bruises, warts, stings and blisters.
Dandelion Dandelions have the Latin name of Taraxacum officinale and have been used for thousands of years in traditional medicine. They have amazing yellow flowers that bees adore and toothed leaves (see the picture). The leaves are edible and have a bitter taste. You can also eat the roots and flowers. The plant is high in iron, vitamins and other minerals. The bitter flavour of dandelion helps stimulate the
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Plantain
There are many kinds of plantain but the most common are Ribwort plantain (Plantago lanceolata) which grows in narrow, longer leaves and Greater Plantain (Plantago major) which has broader
rounder leaves. The leaves and seeds are edible. Plantain is a wonderful ally for wound healing and skin injuries. A leaf can be chewed up in the mouth and then placed directly on a bite, sting, cut or scrape. Plantain can help draw out dirt or infection and also has antiseptic and antibacterial properties. It can aid the skin in healing with to its astringent action (that helps pull tissues together). Plantain can also be placed against sore teeth and gums, amongst many other uses, internally and externally.
Using condiments medicinally Another big section in the book is about how to use things like spices or condiments in medicinal ways. One example is pepper (black pepper). I was in prison with an older Scottish woman called Helen who was always cold when we were working in the prison gardens together. She swore by pepper tea - simply pepper from the prison kitchen added to hot water. It was a warming mixture that helped her resist colds. Pepper can also stimulate digestive juices which is why it is commonly added to food. Mustard is another warming remedy. Beyond adding it to food, mustard has also been added to foot baths or made into a chest poultice for people wanting to get rid of damp, cold coughs. Onions have also commonly been used as part of poultices applied to the chest to help with chest infections.
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image courtesy of Shannon Knox, courtesy of justseeds.org
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Learning herbalism and the out in rashes or blisters on my importance of herbal safety tongue. Once I understood Learning about plants is an amazing journey. One important part is knowing the importance of herbal safety - this means accurately identifying a plant so you are not accidentally eating something poisonous. It can also mean understanding the energetics of a plant and its actions. For example, if something is particularly warming or cooling, relaxing or energising. I’m a very dry and ‘hot’ person so taking very warming spices or herbs can often not be a good idea for me. Before I understood this about herbalism, I’d often be surprised at my intolerance to certain herbs and spices, coming
their energetics, I started to notice the meaningful difference plants that were cooling and moistening made to me (such as mallow - one of the amazing plants featured in the book). It’s also good to know how herbs react with commonly prescribed medications as some can have significant effects. I feel a major part of learning about herbalism is also about connecting with our different heritages. My ancestors are mostly English, Welsh and Irish so I love learning about traditional medicines on these Isles. Many forms of plant medicine have been traditionally
repressed by colonialism and capitalism, and so learning about herbal medicine from your own cultures can be very empowering and an important part of resistance. If you would like to receive a free copy of The Prisoner’s Herbal book please write to: Solidarity Apothecary, PO Box 220340, Brooklyn, NY 11222 Or ask a friend and family member to go online and request one from this website: https://solidarityapothecary.org/ prisonersherbalrequest/ Nicole Rose, from the Solidarity Apothecary and the Prisoners Herbalism Collective
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Mindful Movement & Breath By Brooke Monaco, Wellness Director at Black and Pink
Why is Yoga and focusing on the breath so important for our day-to-day lives? We carry so much stress & discomfort we have hidden away in our bodies that is just waiting to be released. Tension and tightness are physical feelings you will notice diminish, but the mental discomforts of stress, anxiety and multiple others will slowly begin to release as well. Yoga means union. And yoga is the union of body, breath and mind to create an overall healthy balance throughout the body. Below, are four yoga poses and four breathing exercises paired with the benefits and an explanation of how to safely use each one.
image courtesy of Front Row
Cat & Cow Pose
A gentle flow between two poses to open up the spine.
image courtesy of Yogapedia
Coordinate it with your breath to relieve stress and calm the mind, while helping with back pain, opening the chest and stimulating the internal organs. Allow the breath & movement to be slow and deep.
1. Come down to your hands and knees on the floor. Hips stay stacked over knees, shoulders stacked over wrists. Knees and shins hip width apart. Fingertips point straight forward. 2. Inhale as you move into cow pose, letting your belly drop gently towards the floor, chin and gaze towards the ceiling, drawing shoulder blades away from ears. 3. Next, exhale as you move into cat pose, drawing your belly button up towards your spine and rounding your back upwards. Crown of your heads draws towards the ground. Subtly tuck chin. 4. Inhale and return into cow pose. Then,exhale back into cat pose. Repeat 5 to 20 times. MODIFICATION: it is very easy to do cat/cow from a chair or edge of bed as shown.
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Downward Facing Dog image courtesy of Yoga Journal
Known to calm the brain, as well as relieve stress and mild depression. This position stretches shoulders, lower back and hamstrings while energizing the body. Take time to focus on your inhalation and exhalation.
1. Come down to your hands and knees on the floor. Hips stack over knees. Bring hands forward slightly ahead of your shoulders, spread fingertips with index fingers parallel to each other, pointing forward and tuck your toes. 2. Exhale as you lift your knees off the floor, lifting sitting bones(your bum) toward the ceiling. Knees stay slightly bent
and heels lifted away from the floor. Start to walk out your hamstrings by bending one knee at a time, letting heels lift with each bend. Come onto toes, heels lift to stretch toes. 3. On your next exhalation, start to straighten knees, making sure not to lock knees. Push your upper thighs back and draw your heels towards the ground. Roll upper thighs inwards slightly.
4. Press index fingers into the floor and let shoulder blades widen and draw towards the tailbone. 5. Stay in downward facing dog for 1-3 minutes. As you exit, use your exhalation to bend knees back onto the ground. You can always run through a couple cat/ cows afterwards.
Three-Part Breath
The “3- Parts� refer to the abdomen, diaphragm and chest. This breathing technique will help you to not only learn how to breathe fully and completely, but it also increases your oxygen levels, decreasing stress and anxiety. 1. Find an easy seat on the ground, legs crossed. Find a comfortable seat, lengthening the spine upwards. You can stay in this position, or place your left hand on your low abdomen and right hand on your chest. 2. Gently close your eyes, relaxing the face and body. Find your natural breath through your nose. Bring your attention towards your natural breath, feeling it move in and out of your body.
3. On your next inhale, bring your attention to your abdomen, breathing fully in, feeling your belly rise, ribs expand and chest rise. Hold at the top, open your mouth and exhale completely through your abdomen, feeling your chest drop, ribs contract and belly lower. Continue at your own comfortable pace, without pause. 4. Continue for up to 5 minutes.
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Malasana Squat image courtesy of Katie Thompson, Self Magazine
Improves balance, concentration and focus. Stretches out thighs, groin, hips and torso. Helps fight the negative effects that come with daily sitting which tends to cause stress on the back and lower spine. 1.Start in a standing position, feet hip width distance apart and inhale as you bring your arms up over your head. Exhale as you bend at the waist, bringing your hands towards the ground, letting knees stay as bent as needed. 2. Position heels to point slightly inwards, as toes point out. Exhale as you bring your seat down, knees stay wide. 3. Lengthen your spine, keeping it straight. Do not let it curve. Lean slightly forward, but allow weight to stay on heels. If heels
do not stay on the ground, put a folded blanket underneath. Don’t force your heels down, or bend knees past your limits. Do not rock back & forth or bounce, use this pose to find grounding energy.
4. Use your elbows to gently spread your knees & keep them outward. 5. Hold position for 1 minute, then inhale as you straighten your knees back into a stand.
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Alternate Nostril Breathing This breathing technique can be known to help reduce anxiety, stress and promotes well-being through relaxing the mind & body.
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1. Find a comfortable position, legs crossed. Left hands rests gently on left knee. 2. Right hand comes to your right nose and exhale to completely empty your abdomen, use right thumb to close the right nostril. 3. Inhale through the left nostril and cover left nostril with your left ring finger.
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4. Open right nostril, exhale through this side. Inhale through right nostril and then close this nostril. 5. Open left nostril and exhale through left side. 6. Continue for up to 5 minutes, always completing your practice by finishing with the exhale on the left side.
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Bumble Bee Breath This breathing technique is known for being a stress reliever and lowering blood pressure. It also soothes nerves and releases cerebral tension. 1. Sit in a comfortable seated position, legs crossed and spine lengthening towards the ceiling. 2. Index fingers point to the brow point, middle fingers cover eyelids, ring fingers are at the edge of the nostrils (but not covering nostrils), pinky fingers at edge of lips and use thumbs to close ears. Elbows are held out for the chest to remain open. 3. Start to make the buzzing sound of a bee. As you continue making this sound, gently start to close the lips. Tuck the chin slightly and start to feel the vibration in the throat. 4. Draw the pelvis upwards on your inhale, and hold your breath. The exhalation takes place through the nose, while the mouth is closed. The strong humming sound is produced during this exhalation. 5. Attempt rounds of 9. Afterwards, sit still with eyes remaining closed.
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image courtesy of Yoga Journal
Wide Leg Forward Fold Relieves stress, anxiety and mild depression as well as mild back aches, neck and shoulder tension while bringing a calm mind. It also opens hips and improves digestion.
1. Begin standing up. Bring your hands to your hips and step your feet wide. Align your heels with your toes so they are in a straight line.
you. Hands will rest on the floor between your legs, elbows point behind you, in line with your shoulders. If hands do not reach ground, grab opposite elbows.
2. Take a deep inhale and draw the crown of your head upwards. On the exhale, bend at the hips. Torso stays long, head can drop to gaze behind
3. Weight shifts slightly forward to the balls of your feet, keeping hips in line with your toes. Use your inhalations to lengthen your spine and your exhalations
Kundalini Breath of Fire With this breathing exercise, a rhythmic flow of air moves the belly out while inhaling and in while exhaling. This creates heat in the body. This generates energy, has therapeutic benefits, can rid the body of negative energy and may bring a sense of calmness. It may also detoxify the body. 1. Find an easy seat on the ground, legs crossed, finding a comfortable seat, lengthening the spine upwards. 1A- Curl fingers into palms 1B - Point arms in a 45 degree angle towards the
to fold deeper. You can also try rocking side-to-side, bending each knee. 5. Hold for up to one minute. Bring your hands to your hips and press firmly into your feet, using your inhale to lift with a flat back.
ceiling, finding length in the spine, pointing upwards. 2. Using a comfortable pace of breath, when you inhale, feel the belly puffing outwards and when you exhale, your navel is snapping back towards your spine. You can start by keeping your mouth open, making the noise of a panting dog. 3. Start slow, and build up speed as you go. As you get faster breaths, close your mouth to get the airflow in and out of the nose. 4. Slowly build up how long you choose to do this, start with 3 minutes, slowly working your way up to 10-15 minutes.
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Write it All Out: Journal Prompts Grab a comfortable seat, a pen, a pencil and some paper. These next four pages include writing prompts from BEAM (Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective). Space them out, working on one a day, a week, whatever time period makes sense for you. Talk about the prompts with others or make this a private practice you do all on your own. Draw, write poems, whatever feels right. There is no wrong way to journal.
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An Excerpt from ‘Justice 4 Vanessa Super Zine’ By Vanessa N. My name is Vanessa L. Naisha. I am a 57 years young transgender woman. I am an African American light skinned woman born April 25, 1963. I was born in Philadelphia, PA; however, in the early years of my life I ended up in New York. Transitioning in a male prison has been nothing less than torture. I have purposely been placed in very hostile situations by the authorities. I have had prison staff as well as prisoners degrade me verbally and prisoners refuse to sit at a table with me in the chow hall. I basically lived on an island. I was treated as if I was toxic matter. The common names that I was called was: “Fag,” “Home,” or “the Punk.” Prison staff have stood next to prisoners as I passed by and got laughed at. Although it is well-known that I am transgender and my name is Vanessa, I am still referred to as “he” and “him.” The prison staff’s clear intent is to discourage me from being transgender. I am forced to wear facial hair because the razors the prison permits ruin my face and skin. However, laser hair removal is readily available, but the prison staff would rather me drag a razor across my face three times per week and merely damage
my face and endure pain and suffering. When I was finally approved for HRT the torture reached new levels. The medical provider missed the mark several times on my levels. At first it was found that I was ingesting too little and then it was too much. I felt like a test dummy or lab rat. But then again, test dummies and lab rats are treated a whole lot better. As much as I am laughed at and mocked, I feel the circus is the place I belong. Further, the prison staff knew that if they placed me in a cell with random people that it would bring about problems. Needless to say, security placed me in cells and on units with individuals whom are transphobic. Violence came about which put me in a position to defend myself and I did so effectively. Each time that I was attacked I turned the tables. And still I was placed in isolation (“the hole”) and security allowed other prisoners to steal my personal property. Simply put, transitioning in a male prison has been a living HELL! I am on HRT which has caused
me to develop visible breasts and still male guards are allowed to strip search me. I have been threatened that if I did not strip that I will be placed in the hole where I will be forced to strip. How is it that I am on HRT, I have breasts, I wear bras and panties, I am on the transgender list, and my name is Vanessa, but a male guard may strip search me viewing my breasts and undergarments? That single action goes against everything. It is well-established throughout the federal court system that gender dysphoria is a serious psychological condition. Therefore, by law I have specific rights. The same way that male guards are not permitted to strip search women at female facilities it should not be permitted with me. How can I be seen as a woman up until the point of strip search? By prison staff knowing I am transgender and still allowing male guards to strip search me they were deliberately indifferent to my gender dysphoria. Currently pending before the District Court of Delaware is a civil action that I filed against officers and prison officials.
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The action asserts that the officers and officials were deliberately indifferent to my gender dysphoria by allowing male guards to strip search me. I am also challenging the constitutionality of the strip search policy. However, it has happened several times after that so I will be amending it which will add
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more defendants and claims. At this time, I am litigating my action pro se (without an attorney), which is an uphill battle. When it is time for depositions, transcript, brief writing, and filing any appeal it will require cost. I certainly will need the appropriate funding. Without
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the proper funding a lot of things will be blocked by the court which will prevent me from fully and fairly litigating my case. Moreover, this is not exclusively about me. My main objective is to get a policy put in place that will protect the LGBTQ prison community, so funding is certainly needed
Molly Fair, courtesy of JustSeeds
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We’ve been transforming these kamps into revolutionary schools of thought for decades, but as you know our fascist oppressors have been trying to sabotage our efforts, with state sanctioned murder of our leaders, to long-term isolation practices, as well as sowing discord amongst conscious prisoners who wage the right to challenge their conditions (continued below).
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1971 - Jackson, MI: Prisoners form labour union
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full moon
1973 - New Orleans: Herman Bell captured
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1877 - Crazy Horse arrested, killed during escape attempt
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2001 - NYC: Planes destroy World Trade Center, Bush’s “war on terror” begins
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Labour Day (U.S. & Canada)
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1971 - NY: Attica Prison Rebellion begins
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1973 - Chile: U.S. helps 1977 - South Africa: Steve Biko killed in prison overthrow Allende
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1982 - Lebanon: Massacre at Sabra & Shatila refugee camps, hundreds of Palestinians murdered
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1973 - CA: Veronza Bowers captured
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Mexican Independence Day
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1968 - Mexico City: Army invades UNAM university in response to protests
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1868 - Birth of the Puerto Rican Nation, El Grito de Lares
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1971 - KS: State prison food strike
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2000 - Palestine: 2nd Palestinian Intifada begins Yom Kippur
Autumn Equinox
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2005 - Puerto Rico: FBI 2000 - PA: Political assassinated Filiberto prisoner Jihad Abdulmumit Ojeda Rios released from prison
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Native Americans' Day (CA)
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Rosh Hashanah
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2014 – Iguala Guerrero, Mexico: 43 student-teachers forcibly taken and disappeared
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What we need is outside support from those in the community who want to get to know us who (for some) will be returning back into society, and a lot of us suffer from illness such as PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and will need to build relationships with our future friends who we can very well be working side by side with as activists, organizers, and wherever a need is in order to meet it. - Mwalimu Shakur See full article at certaindays.org
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Letters from our Inside Family
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Dear B&P family,
Hi everybody @ Black & Pink,
one yet.
I hope everyone is healthy physically, spiritually, and mentally. This is a time for us to come together and support each other.
How are you all? As for me, I’m healthy and it appears that we are doing OK. We have been on lockdown in cells since March 31 and still go out to chow halls to grab meals to go and now that we got mask to wear while out for meals.
My time is coming near. I got about 2.5 years left and I am trying to find pen pals that are bi/gay so that making friends through that pen pal communication would last for friendship and we can keep in touch even though I leave prison. I’ll still reach those friends through letters.
Here in New York State, the governor has stopped a lot of stuff and the commissioner has stopped all visits to the correctional facilities so I can just imagine what the other states are doing about COVID-19 with the prison population. New York State has compensated us by giving us phone calls for free and five free letters to our family and friends for every week that this COVID-19 lock down is going on. I have been meditating and doing my yoga so I won’t go crazy being locked in my cell. The tension levels here are raising by the day. We have to remember that this is only a minor setback in our lives and we will pull through. When you think positive, your actions reflect your thoughts. Keep yourselves healthy. Lend your support to each other even if it’s the smallest act of kindness. We’re a community, family and pride. So we shall conduct ourselves as such. I love all of you. Love, Shaylanna (NY)
You mentioned about free commissary items for the duration of the health crisis. We had to buy hand sanitizer (limit 1) and it just came in then that week its sold and not everyone had a chance to buy it because of money from home which didn’t arrive in time. They did not give us anything free (soap, etc.) except free masks... We only can come out of cell 3x a week for one hour to shower, use phone, use computer, M + W + F, that’s it and it’ll be until May 18. We heard from the rumors that it might be extending more longer. Can you imagine what it feels like for a Deaf guy here (me) - going through all this crisis without knowing what might last. I can’t use phone (only when staffs in office are present to let me use special device for phone). I couldn’t hear no radio, mp3, or hear any other inmates. However, I am waiting for outside to open so they could transfer inmates to different facilities. I am supposedly going to a special program at the facility but I don’t know which
I live in SO CA and am looking for dudes in that area for friendship and more. Someone age 19+ up and likes outdoors, likes to write and meet. I’m 48 years old, half Italian and half Mexican. 5’ 9”” 180 lb. I’m bi. I used to dress like a skater, motocross, always have shorts, no crew socks, wear Etnies brands and Vans. They look more as skaters/surfers. Wear sterling silver. Someone that I could talk to after release from prison. Are there LGBT chapters in the Los Angeles area or San Fernando Valley area? Both in Southern California. “”Love”” signs Truly, Brandon C. (FL)
Dear B&P, Hello, this is Lee at Valley State Prison. I am healthy and safe. Doing alright. I want everyone
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What we are trying to do is help the masses unlearn their connections with the state and protections. So there are times we work with reform movements. There are times we join the neoliberal approach to challenge unjust laws and change policies. But, abolition is our goal. It should be yours too. - The Abolitionist Law Center. See full article at certaindays.org
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1968 - Mexico City: Tlatelolco Massacre, thousands killed during protest
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last quarter
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1969 - LA: BPP member Walter Toure Pope murdered by cops
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X 12 Day of Mourning (Colonial holidays known as Canadian Thanksgiving/U.S. Columbus Day) DĂa de la Raza (Mexico)
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2001 - U.S. begins bombing Afghanistan
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1979 - DC: 100,000 people at 1st march for lesbian & gay rights 1970 - Angela Davis captured
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1968 - Presidio Mutiny, military prisoners strike against Vietnam War
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1981 - Nyack, NY: Brinks 1963 - Folsom, CA: Strike robbery by BLA & allied protesting 4 cents/hour anti-imperialists wage
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Day of the Heroic Guerrilla
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1967 - Che Guevara killed in Bolivia
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Cuban Independence Day
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1948 - Robert Seth Hayes born 1966 - Oakland, CA: BPP founded 1968 - U.S. federal court 1859 - WV: Abolitionist prohibits use of whips on John Brown leads attack prisoners on Federal Armory
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National Day Against Police Brutality (U.S.)
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1967 - Oakland, CA: Huey Newton arrested Mawlid al-Nabi (Sunni)
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Letters from our Inside Family
to know that they are not alone during these times. That together, at a safe distance, there is strength in numbers. We should all do our part in checking in on friends, and family, even those who live next to us or around us. Just wish we were ready for this crisis ahead of time. Wish there was a plan in place, just in case. And as a species, we survived through a lot, like the Ice Age and came out from past viruses/ illnesses. We beat the odds. We can do it again. My family back home is doing great and I thank God for that. And I wish you and your families the same safety and health. Keeping you all in prayers and thought. Take care and be safe. Know that we will get through this. “Weeping may endure for the night but joy comes in the morning.” Till pen meets paper, stay healthy. Your friend, Lee O. (CA)
Hello to everyone in the B&P Community! My name is Stephanie or you can call me Stephie. I’m a 32 year old bisexual and I’m transgender. I was born a man but I’m mentally female. I’m new
to this new me. I’m new to B&P. I love being who and what I am. Please continue to be you! Only change for the better. Reading this newsletter inspired me to stay true to myself and to never give up. I can’t imagine going through the things I read about in my brother’s and sister’s stories. I want to send this out to say, be you! Yes it’s hard, only because we allow it. Maybe I’m just speaking for myself. I don’t know what it’s like in your shoes but if I could trade places with you to feel the pain you’re going through, I would with no delay. That’s how much I care. Thank you for accepting me. In love, grace and peace!!! Ya girl from another world, Stephie (OH)
Black & Pink, First, I’d like to thank you for the several issues I’ve received over the last nine plus months. There has always been something that has been very informative, inspiring or heartfelt. Being incarcerated isn’t always the easiest. Being LGBTQ just adds to the difficulties. It’s disheartening to read the abuse so many experience. Personally, I’m bisexual and have been for most of my life. There are only a very small number of people who know; none of which are incarcerated. However, the strength I read in
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every issue is amazing, I think it’s great that there are people willing to put out a newsletter such as Black and Pink. As a side note, I love the stories in Hot Pink. I especially enjoy the naughtier ones. Anonymous
Dear Black & Pink Family, Hello once again my brothers and sisters! I wrote to you last under the name Nina-Maay. I have since changed my name to Olivia Le-Nae Valentine. I have some bad news to tell you all. My stepdad has been diagnosed with two types of cancer, stage 3 lung and stage 4 brain. I ask for prayers of any and all faiths to help in his recovery. I am in a state of extreme depression and fear the worst for him. I barely eat or sleep anymore. I need help and support. I have NO ONE on the outside who cares for me and my family has decided to disown me due to my sexuality. I’ve tried so hard to keep my sanity but I’m losing the fight by a long shot. I have never had the privilege to go to store since I’ve been down and probably never will. I can’t even get basic hygiene for myself. I could care less about all that thought because all I’ve ever wanted is to feel both loved and wanted. And when I found that ... I lost it. Her name (she’s a T-girl) is Harley Anastasia R. and we have been together since 7-17-19.
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1950 - Puerto Rican activists attempt to assassinate U.S. President Truman Day of the Dead (Mexico) Daylight Savings Time ends
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1979 - NJ: Assata Shakur liberated from Clinton Women’s Prison
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Mawlid al-Nabi (Shi’a)
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1970 - NY: Rebellion at Auburn prison
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1831 - VA: Slave rebel Nat Turner hanged 1887 - IL: Haymarket martyrs hanged 1972 - NJ: Work strike at Clinton Women’s Prison
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1955 - Nigerian writer/ activist Kenule Beeson “Ken” Saro-Wiwa dies
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Veteran’s Day (U.S.) Remembrance Day (Canada)
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1969 - Chicago: BPP member Spurgeon “Jake” Winters murdered by police
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Diwali
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2018 - Mujahid Farid dies
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1983 - Mexico: The Zapatista National Liberation Army is born
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1999 - Seattle, WA: Demonstrations against the WTO
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1803 - Victory of Haitian revolutionaries in antislavery & independence struggle at Vertières
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International Day Against Violence Against Women
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Nuh Washington, deeply soulful ex-member of the Black Panthers and of the Black Liberation Army who had been a political prisoner for close to 30 years, was dying of liver cancer, a product of Hepatitis C from a blood transfusion decades earlier. We weren’t mourning his terminal illness, we were celebrating being together, with lively political discussions, remembering old times, jokes, and laughter. A few minutes before regular visiting hours ended, a prisoner orderly, one who really respected Nuh, came down to take him back up to the infirmary. As Nuh was being wheeled away, I said to him, one more time, “Happy Birthday!” He looked back at me, his eyes glistening with joy and said, “It has been!” He died on April 28, 2000. His immense contribution to the struggle and his shining spirit live on. - David Gilbert. See full article at certaindays.org
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More Letters from our Inside Family TDC split us up and she was the only thing in my life keeping me alive and full of happiness, love and companionship. Now I don’t know what to do. I sit here with no hope of ever being reunited with her. As I stated in my last letter, I’m in prison for a sex crime in which I never even committed. I’ve sought help through various agencies only to be told they can’t help or I could pay them to help. I tried to ask HALO to help but they want to charge me $17,500 plus some just to see what they can do. I don’t have that kind of money. I was still in high school when I got locked up. I didn’t even have a job. So as everyone can see, I’m in a bind with no way out. I have written to Thurgood Marshall School of Law which is an Innocence Project out of Houston, Texas. My case with them has not been denied or accepted but I am slowly losing hope that they will help me prove my innocence so I may go home. I just wish I had at least a pen pal to write to who could help me ease my mind and help pass the time. I’ve been having suicidal thoughts but I have stayed my hand in hopes of both help and true friendship. Can some please help me before I do something I can’t take back? In hope, Olivia L. V. (TX)
PS - To Ms. Harley A. Here’s something I hope you remember writing to me in which I now write to you: “ I love you for giving your heart to me and trusting me with your PRIDE. I love you for wanting me and needing me by your side. I love you for the emotions I never knew i had. I love you for making me smile whenever I feel sad. I love you for your thoughts of me where I ‘m always on your mind. I love you for finding that part of me that I never thought I’d find. I love you for the way you are and for how you make me feel. But most of all, I love you because you’re mine for Real. I’m still holding it down for you baby here on the Stiles Unit. Muah. I love you! MMFCL Much Mutha Freaking Clown Love
Well let me start off by saying hi. My name is James but my AKA is Jamie. I have read your September Issue 4, Volume 10 and I would love to give a shout out to all that have wrote to you. the people I would like to say, stay wrong. Talia Jade (MD), I just love what you have wrote and love. Keep your head up and stay strong. Ms. Raven (OK), I would like to say to you I am a 69-year-old transgender doing time in San Diego, CA. Love, it will be hard
on us to be transgender but all we can do is live it one day at a time and just say to yourself, I love how I am. Yes it is hard for us being in prison and being how we are. Love, we got to love ourselves first. Redd (MI), love, there is nothing in this world that can put me back into the closet. Honey, just be you. You didn’t have to cut your hair and grow out your body hair for no mother f----r. Stand proud in who you are. Stand up to all the bullies and say, yes, you can be loved by any one. Tyler (AR), I would like to say when I came out, I didn’t know how gender things worked either. I thought I was bi/gay/ queer/transgender or what the f_ck I what i n my life. I have been married two times and was very unhappy both times. My mind was on the gays. When I would have sex with them, I would feel so gross about it. So I would go out and find me a man. Well, love, keep your head up. Love you, from Jamie. To all the people I have not wrote to I would love to say the LGBT will always be there for us. Well, y’all, I’m going to close. Love y’all from James AKA Jamie and love to all the men and women in the LGBT family. Love always, Jamie R. (CA)”
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Black & Pink News
JULY/AUGUST 2020
Letters from our Inside Family Hello my dearest B & P Family, First please allow me to introduce my lovely lady self to the whole family. My birth name is Kristopher and I am a 29 year old trans woman. But let’s just face it. I am not a Kristopher. So from now on it’s Kristy. To tell my story: I have always loved to wear women’s clothes. But I just thought there was something wrong with me. . I never been into women, have always known I like men but I was raised in a Mormon household and being gay or anything that we are in the LGBTQ community was completely wrong. So I tried to hide the person I was and be the “man” my parents wanted me to be. So I got married to a woman and really tried to make it work. But she said I was too girly for her and that she needed a real man. So that ended that. And so I came out to my parents as being a gay drag queen and they flipped shit. They told me there was something wrong with me. So, in short, my whole family has disowned me. So I went through a rough time, got on meth and went downhill from there. I got locked up and for four years so far I have caught hell for just being me. But this is where I found out I was a t-girl. Cause I lived in a small country town and there was NO one like me there. So it was not until I came to prison that I found and came to know who I really was. And it was with the help of my man
and my sister Bree. But there is one problem: my man does not want me to lose the between my legs. Family, what do I do? Any ideas? Now don’t get me wrong, he supports me in doing all of the other things like hormone replacement, body hair removal and wearing women’s clothes. And I have been with him for almost a year. So I really love him and he treats me like a woman. But he just does not want to let me get rid of the thing between my legs. He said I would not get any sexual pleasure after the sex change. Is that even true? And I would like to give a shout out to my sister Holly Lynn on the Polansky Unit. I know your troubles, I’m on the Smith Unit in ECB and the inmates and guards give me hell, too. Girl just keep your head up and stay strong for me, OK? And the same goes for all the LGBTQ+ family. Stick together. Together we can overcome anything. Love, your T-girl, Kristy S. (TX)
All my love to my B&P Family! I’m sending love and strength to everyone. This letter is a message to all my trans sisters. This is Honey here at E. A. R. U. Max in Marianna, AR. I just let most of these guys around here call me Fresno on account of a town in Cali near where I’m from.
But it’s not anyone else that this message is about. This is about the power of us, in us and by us. I was sitting here watching TV when Venus came into the barracks to use the shower. We seen each other ... (I’m about to cry) ... Girls it was instant recognition and that sisterhood through and through. We couldn’t shut up for the whole time she was in here. We were both feeling so alone and just shitty. She had asked me why I was being so hard on myself and after I answered her, she simply said “Girl, you gotta get over that shit!” It was so pure though that it painted my troubles irrelevant. I have been so alone and so damn tired of being played or mistreated, misunderstood, overlooked, etc. My message to all trans sisters everywhere ... we are another and special kind of woman and we know how to heal each other. Don’t sit in torment. Find a sister. Reach out. Connect. STAND. (crying good tears). I love you so much. You just don’t know how much we need each other. Just ... shine girls. Loving yourself is loving each other. I know we got our drama too but we handle our own and lift each other up with ease. Venus, girl, you know I’m in my feelings as I write. GIRL, I LOVE YOU and I THANK YOU. You’re a beautiful woman and the best sister ever ... It was so damn nice to feel you latch on with me like that. That protective feeling and protected feeling (GIRL, I’M A
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Letters from our Inside Family CRYING MESS RIGHT NOW). I just wanna say, I LOVE YOU. The lesson I’m sharing with everyone is that: Things don’t get better by themselves. - Honey (AR)
Greetings to all my Black & Pink Family, My name is Strawberry. I am a 58 yo gay, white man. I have been a guest of the TDJC for almost 20 years and I have to say that the service in this establishment sucks. I have epileptic seizures and take dialantin every day for it. Recently, I went from heaven to hell. Let me explain. Up until Dec. 2019, I was at the Bridgeport Unit northwest of Fort Worth - air conditioned, movies in the gym, good food and cool officers. Then I got sent to hell - The Beto Unit near Huntsville. No AC, we never go to outside rec. The offenders and the officers do pretty much what they want. I was told that I was being sent to a medical unit so that I would have better care for my seizures. Their idea of better care was to put me in the first cell on the wing so that the officer on duty could keep an eye on me. Well, two weeks after I got here I told a second shift officer that I was not feeling well and to keep an eye on me. His exact words to me were “I don’t care if you die, I will call medical.” Then I wrote a grievance to the warden. The
next day I was called to the grievance office and asked why I was wasting the administration’s time about such a minor issue. I am so angry and frustrated and I wish that I knew a lawyer who would take this case. I am positive I could win a lawsuit. However I am indigent and no one is going to do it for free. Dominique, keep up the good work. Family, stand strong and be proud. Together we are unstoppable. -Strawberry (TX)
My biological name at birth is Willie G. I go by the name Kanani. I am also a transgender person by birth. My point is you put other transgender people with dysphoria lives at risk when we don’t build communities for older adulthood, Black, transgender fighting for racial and gender justice, who are fighting against homophobia. (They need places) where they can feel safe, accepted and free to ask and all questions they may have about their bodies, love and sex and the myriad ways they do and don’t intersect. We are creating Black transgender are not a problem for a unconditional love isn’t meant to be lonely. Who only know how to shut out the world out because it never let them in. I also like to mention the cause of my struggle is hair loss, a few patches of hair loss.
It is thought that something triggers the immune system to stop hair growth. It is not always known what the cause is. Some people have genetic markers that can increase the chance of developing alopecia areata. “ - Kanani (CA)
Dear Black & Pink Family, My 8 year sexual abuse in my younger years was not my fault at all and I forgave my mother along with many others who physically and sexually abused me. Yes, it took me a long time to forgive these people but the hardest person to forgive was myself. I blamed myself for being born and my abuse, believing God hated me so much the He planned my whole future to fail. I said I believed this before I started my forgiveness process. Because of my abuse, it left me confused about my sexuality. I enjoy sex with bottom men more than women. I stopped the bottom action at the age of 19 because it caused me to have too many flashbacks. I started to date all bottoms. You could have called me a hoe back then but I thought having sex like that was normal because I was raised that way. And luckily I didn’t end up with HIV or AIDS or some incurable STD. I am now in a same sex relationship and we are both faithful and in love with each other. He’s never been locked up
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JULY/AUGUST 2020
Black & Pink News
Letters & Poetry from our Inside Family before and is waiting for me to come home so we can build on our future together. I call him Too-Tough because he tried his best to handle me and that turned me on and caused me to fall in love with him and he felt the same. But we all get a blessing with true love once in a lifetime and when it comes, hold on to it for dear life. Some of you may know me by the name of Mr. Echo but now I am just Detrick D. from New Jersey that will be living a normal life when released. I gave up gang banging and going to Islamic services. I did not give up my religion thought and Allah will judge me accordingly to the Quran. But this is the first time I been happy in my whole life and I will not give that up for anything. I never had happiness until Allah blessed me with me soulmate and I will never trade this love we have for anything or anyone, FACTS. I have daughters and they are so happy that I changed, got help for myself and my eyes is not dark anymore. Even my ex wife is so happy for me and we became the best of friends because we started off as friends anyway. My life took a 100% turn and I never in a million years thought this would ever happen to me. So I will love to say to my LGBTQ family and those who are still in the closet, God will bless you with true love as long
as you be true to who you are and give that love back to the mate He sends your way. Now this is for those who love to judge. You judge because you have a secret of your own swinging on that rusty hanger in your closet. You know you want to be with and cute ass gay dude and made that ol boy got the balls to snatch that cute gay dude up and you don’t want your homeboys to clown you or kick your ass but in reality, out of two or three of your homeboys, they are thinking the same way as you are or even checking you out, FACT. So stop judging and sit your undercover gay ass down somewhere. I love you all. Your brother in arms, Detrick D. (NJ)
Hey, my brothers and sisters. Let me say this to you all. When a person gets mad, they say something they don’t mean. at the time. So please forgive them for the things they say and don’t abandon them and don’t kick them out and don’t make them feel like they are not wanted around. And don’t hurt them. Well, I got mad and said something mean to someone that I didn’t mean to say. I was mad at the time and I was not thinking straight at the time. Yes it is hard to stop and think at the
time because you are so mad right now and I know after you calm down you regret it after it is done and said. And you didn’t mean to say it and it is wrong to abandon that person and punish them because they got you so mad. Yes, I understand you but work differences out and the problem can be fixed and just learn from your mistake and don’t say that word again ever. We as a gay community have to understand that everybody’s mind works different and we don’t all think the same. We are not all the same person in the world so I am asking you to forgive them and talk it out and don’t abandon them and kick them out of the gay community. We all need to get along with each other and help one another out with whatever it is if they need something or whatever it be. If it is, just have a talk about a problem or about life. I am truly sorry for what I said. We all are together as one world no matter what race we are so help your brothers and sisters out and stick together no matter what it is. Love each other. Yours truly, Baby Snow
Volume 11, Issue 4
Lonely Sparrow Lonely is he who sits on the branch of eternal life and death, not knowing which way to go. His life has nothing more left. Days come when to spread his wings has even become a task. With his head hung low, his time is soon to pass. A song is playing in his head, singing ... “You Are Not Alone.” With tears in his painful eyes, all he do is silently mourn. Hear ye, hear ye is a voice heard from high and above. Only if he believes in himself, “God” will express his desiring love Like “A Rose That Grew From Concrete”” his life is twisted with thistles and thorns, with nowhere to go or anyone to turn to, he feels all alone. Another day is gone with the memories left to bind his broken heart, encasing his light and making his spirit momentarily dark. Today is the day that tomorrow will never change. If he just have a little faith, “God” will erase his unwanting pain. So to him who seems far and afraid and in the path to be hit by Cupid’s arrow, I thank “God” for I am no longer a lonely sparrow. - Paul F. (GA)
Broken Chains Left alone when I was three, Never to discover why, Blaming and clinging to self, I slowly began to cry.
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Before I was the age of nine, I chose the life so cold, A life of lengthy crime, Smoking, shooting, growing old. I never meant to hurt mom. But God, I really did. Arrested that very night, I was no longer a little kid. Charged with a sentence of life I took an enormous fall, And with remorse and lots of strife, I live inside these prison walls. Then one night on a bended knee, I asked for some answers. Only to discover the very next day, That I was diagnosed with cancer. My best friend on earth has gone to sleep, Memories are all I have to keep A worn out Bible beside my bed Where each night I lay my head. All I have left is to give my best Because I know I’m truly blessed Within these concrete, razored walls I know God walks these halls. Rise to the challenge - Take the leap. Standing tall, fight the fight, With or without me by your side Sleep in peace this very night. Bless you in the love of Christ And on this very day On bended knee believe, All you have to do is pray. - Wolf T. (MA)
Life is a drink mixed by a madman Swirls of liquid behind frosted glass The heavens appear in this shaken mass To drink it is asking for crawling skin To dump it is to commit a grievous sin My own doesn’t in this cavernous cup So I asked for a chalice and filled it up “It’s meant to be had in one or the other!” Well it was poured wrong as it came out of its mother It looks so perfect in its new glass home Though, at times, it has far too much foam Still, I can finally quaff this thing called life (It’s sometimes too bitter, but I like it alright) For my greatest supporter, Skye - Tanya (OR)
AMPERSAND Beautiful is what we are, a Love that spreads in so many directions; All of us, and you Coming together as one allKnowing & Precious forces; power only found; In a thousand rainbows; Never to fade thisKingdom in Black & Pink Array. L. W. Doane, (NY)
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Black & Pink News
JULY/AUGUST 2020
Get to Know Jasmine Tasaki, Our New Director of Advocacy Black & Pink is excited to welcome Jasmine Tasaki as their new Director of Advocacy. Jasmine is based in Memphis, Tennessee, and will bring greater geographic representation from the South to the organization. Jasmine Tasaki (she|hers) is a staunch advocate and community organizer for transgender women and issues affecting trans rights, health, and housing. Through her work, intersectionality has become very important to her. Jasmine has worked as a PrEP navigator, an HIV counselor, Sexual Health Educator, and Cultural Competency Facilitator for the Memphis Police Department. She was also the first leader of trans experience in the National Urban League of Young Professionals (Health Literacy and Advocacy Chairperson, Memphis Chapter), and an Ambassador for the Black AIDS Institute. Ms. Tasaki is also the Executive Director of the first trans-led organization, WeCareTN, in Memphis.
In her role as the Director of Advocacy, Jasmine will lead the development and execution of strategies to advance Black
& Pink’s policy and advocacy goals. Her primary responsibility will be to oversee the strategic development of the National LGBT/HIV Criminal Justice Working Group (the Working Group) and build collaborative relationships with advocates, decision-makers, and issue experts to further the Working
Group’s policy and advocacy goals. Jasmine will also lead the strategic development of Black & Pink Chapters, support Chapter advocacy campaigns and projects, and provide advocacy support to our inside members.
Mary Tremonte, courtesy of JustSeeds
Jasmine believes that “support is the foundation you stand on, values are the directions you walk by, and relationships are the garden in which you grow.”
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A Message From Jasmine Hello Friends! I am excited to be a part of the staff here at Black and Pink as the Director of Advocacy. Some concerns have been raised about my work with the Memphis Police Department. Am I abolitionist enough because I have worked with the system? I’ve learned to love myself and my story. I had to reintroduce myself to myself. Let me introduce myself to you, because it is time for trans women of color to reclaim our voices, narrative, and people. As a Black trans woman, I have survived sexual violence, drug addiction, and trans violence. After being shot for a fourth time, I realized I had had enough. This was not the life I deserved. I needed to think things through from my foundation. I grew up in the church and grew up with a really great foundation and family, but not everyone does. I saw that there was a gap and that there was a need in the community for people to meet transgender women of color, especially where they were, in the areas that their family would have if they had that, but they didn’t. Memphis, where I am from, is number eight in the country for new HIV infections and in the top ten percentile for poverty. Black trans women disproportionately contract HIV and experience poverty.
I started doing advocacy for a little while, working in public health. I found myself happy doing HIV testing, counseling, linkage to care, and PrEP [pre-exposure prophylaxis] navigation. I did that work and actually found that I like to create events and connect personally with everybody. I saw that I had a deep connection to my community. After almost two years of this work, I was let go and found myself back in survival sex work. Spending time in eight different jails across the country made me realize that sex workers and substance users have little to no support or affirming care. And with that, I kept working and actually transitioned into wanting to address some needs and concerns that I saw in the community and that were communicated to me by the community. And it just brought me to creating WeCareTn, so that I could directly serve in the community that I am a part of. Then the Family Safety Center provided me an opportunity to address interpersonal violence in Memphis, TN. As a person who is system-impacted and has survived many things in life, I believed this opportunity gave me the platform to advocate for my people as a LGBTQ+ liaison. I also thought it would be impactful for a Black trans woman to be the facilitator for
cultural competency sessions for police officers who are paid by the government to be first responders in a domestic dispute. This opportunity provided me with all that, but also gave me further insight on how to navigate systems of oppression as a Black trans woman. As any other time in my life, navigating through systems of oppression is learned and not taught. Nine people molested me, I was raped 12 times, shot seven times. It is a dangerous life to live…I’ve learned to use EVERYTHING I’ve been through as a source of inspiration to others in the community. All of my efforts in advocacy work is because of my life story. I am still learning. I, in no way align myself with the values of police, but I do align myself with the issues and concerns of the community. I look forward to developing my perception of liberation through the abolition work I will do with Black and Pink. Let’s learn together. Much Love, Jasmine Tasaki Director of Advocacy, Black and Pink
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Call for Submissions Seeking erotic short stories, poems, and art by Black & Pink incarcerated and free-world family members for a new zine. To be mailed, art cannot include full nudity. Please send submissions addressed to Black & Pink — HOT PINK. This is a voluntary project, and no money will be offered for submissions, but you might get the chance to share your spicy story with many other readers! The zine will be sent one or two times per year. To subscribe to upcoming issues of HOT PINK, write to our address, Black & Pink — HOT PINK.
Black & Pink Mailing Information Write to us at: Black & Pink — [see table below] 6223 Maple St. #4600 Omaha, NE 68104 Please note that you can send multiple requests/ topics in one envelope! Due to concerns about consent and confidentiality, you cannot sign up other people for the newspaper. However, we can accept requests from multiple people in the same envelope. There’s no need to send separate requests in more than one envelope.
If you are being released and would still like to receive the Black & Pink News, please let us know where to send it! Penpal program info: LGBTQ+ people who are incarcerated can list their information and a short non-sexual ad online where people can see it and write. There will be forms in upcoming issues Mail info: We are several months behind on our mail. There will be a delay, but please keep writing! Email us: members@blackandpink.org
If you would like to request:
Address the envelope to:
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Black & Pink — Advocacy
Submit to or request Erotica Zine
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art by Pete Railand, courtesy of JustSeeds