EDITORIAL
Editor-in-Chief - Caleb Stultz
CREATIVE SERVICES
Creative Director - Haimanti Germain
Graphic Designer - Aspen Smit
DIRECTOR OF SALES
Marsha Blacker
Bryan Kennison
Saxsquatch. Courtesy photo
MAN HELD INFANT HOSTAGE DURING HOURSLONG SWAT STANDOFF NEAR ST. MATTHEWS, POLICE SAY
Louisville police say a 28-year-old man barricaded himself inside a home with a 6-month-old child, threatened to throw the baby from a window, and later admitted involvement in a weekend shooting.
BY CALEB STULTZ
During an hours-long SWAT standoff near St. Matthews on Monday, a Louisville man barricaded himself inside a house with a 6-month-old baby, according to police, and is now in custody.
Officers were called to a trouble run in the 100 block of Wiltshire Avenue shortly after noon, according to Louisville Metro Police. According to court documents, the suspect’s mother called the police earlier that morning to report that her son had become combative and may have been involved in a shooting the previous evening.
The mother informed dispatchers that she was unable to speak freely before the call was cut off, according to an arrest citation. Later, she texted the address to the police, alerting them to the presence of a gun and a baby inside.
Clint Dean Lobig, 28, is the suspect who barricaded himself inside the house with the baby after forcing his mother out. According to court records, earlier in the morning, Lobig went into his mother’s bedroom, yelled at her to stop yelling, threw her onto a bed, and suffocated her with
his hand for about a minute, making it difficult for her to breathe.
SWAT deployed to the scene
SWAT and Hostage Negotiation Team units were dispatched by LMPD to secure the area. Police claim that Lobig was armed during the negotiations and repeatedly disobeyed orders to turn himself in. He allegedly threatened to toss the baby out of a second-story window at one point, according to the police.
After a few hours, Lobig and the child peacefully gave themselves up at 3:20 p.m. According to police, the infant was examined by EMS and found to be unharmed.
Lobig is currently charged with several offenses, including endangering the welfare of a minor, assault related to domestic violence, unlawful imprisonment, and strangulation.
What Lobig is accused of
According to police, Lobig is also accused of being involved in a shooting that happened on Sunday night close to a
laundromat in the 3700 block of Lexington Road. A man was shot and transported to UofL Hospital with non-life-threatening injuries, according to the police.
According to court records, Lobig told police that he thought a maroon SUV was pursuing him and acknowledged shooting at another car. In that instance, the victim reported to the police that he had stopped to check his GPS when gunfire occurred.
Lobig is accused of possessing a handgun by a convicted felon in addition to assault charges pertaining to the shooting. He is being held at Louisville Metro Corrections, and his court appearance is set for Tuesday morning.
Further information regarding the baby’s relationship to Lobig and whether mental health assessments are being taken into consideration as part of the case has not been made public by the police.
CAUGHT TRYING TO TRANSMIT DRUGS, NOT DATA: KETAMINE FOUND HIDDEN INSIDE ETHERNET SPOOL AT LOUISVILLE PORT
CBP officers and a sharp-nosed canine uncovered nearly seven pounds of ketamine concealed inside networking equipment bound for Belgium.
BY CALEB STULTZ
At the Port of Louisville, a seemingly routine shipment of networking equipment devolved into a high-stakes drug bust.
In late January, a spool of Ethernet cable was seized by U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) officers after a trained CBP dog detected the shipment while sweeping the inspection area. The cargo appeared to be just “ETHERNET CABLE,” but upon closer inspection, it was much more hazardous.
A single spool of Ethernet cable was included in the shipment, but upon closer examination by CBP officers, three packages of a white, crystal-like material hidden inside the wire were discovered.
The substance was identified as ketamine through field testing. Officers confiscated almost seven pounds of the drug in total, which is estimated to be worth $50,000 on the black market. Belgium was the destination of the shipment.
Ketamine is categorized as a controlled substance under Schedule III. It is frequently abused due to its dissociative and hallucinogenic effects, despite having valid medical uses in both human and veterinary medicine, such as sedation, pain relief and some mental health treatments.
Louisville Port Director Phil Onken praised the work of CBP officers and their canine
partners, emphasizing their role in protecting the community.
“The work of the brave men and women at the Port of Louisville and the hard work and dedication of our canine teams has prevented yet another shipment of dangerous drugs from reaching our communities,” Onken said. With over 1,500 teams across the nation, the CBP Canine Program is the biggest and most varied law enforcement dog program in the nation. In addition to assisting with search and rescue and special response operations, these highly skilled dogs can identify concealed drugs, weapons, money, and even human remains.
Seven pounds of ketamine was concealed inside networking equipment bound for Belgium Gandalf, a sniffing canine for the CBP Canine Program Courtesy photo
CHICA’S CANTINA NOW OPEN IN THIS LOUISVILLE NEIGHBORHOOD
Shahar owners Vikrant Multani and Christian Nava open a modern Mexican-inspired taquería with agave-forward cocktails and late-night energy
BY CALEB STULTZ
Chica’s Cantina, the modern Mexican-inspired restaurant from husband-and-wife team Vikrant Multani and Christian Nava, is now officially open in Louisville’s Butcher Block neighborhood. Located at 1015 E. Main St., the new taquería marks the duo’s latest culinary venture following the success of their acclaimed vegan restaurant, Shahar.
Chica’s Cantina combines traditional Mexican roots with modern flair in order to create a lively gathering place. The restaurant offers creative agave-forward cocktails, strong, street-inspired flavors, and a lively ambiance designed to make guests feel happy, social, and welcome.
There are 15 seats available in the restaurant’s cozy main dining area, and there is more space on the second floor. With the addition of a sizable patio this spring, Chica’s Cantina will have even more space for alfresco dining and community gatherings as the weather warms up.
“Opening Chica’s Cantina has truly been a labor of love,” says co-owner Vikrant Multani. “We wanted to create a place that feels full of life—where great food, cocktails, and community come together in the historic Butcher Block. We’re excited to finally share it with Louisville.”
The menu focuses on contemporary taquería favorites prepared with robust flavors and
homemade tortillas. Chica’s Special Ribeye tacos, Steak Trompo, Al Pastor Trompo, Crispy Mushroom tacos, and shareable plates made for informal dining and late-night cravings are among the highlights.
For co-owner Christian Nava, the concept is deeply personal. “When I moved to Louisville from California, I couldn’t find the street-style tacos I grew up with, so I wanted to bring that energy here,” Nava says. “The name ‘Chica’ comes from what my little sisters have called me since they were toddlers—it felt like the perfect heart behind the restaurant.”
Chica’s Cantina officially opened Friday, February 6, following a ribbon-cutting ceremony with Suzanne Manuel Wright, Deputy Chief of Staff for the Mayor. The restaurant aims to play an active role in Louisville’s evolving food scene while contributing to continued economic development in Butchertown.
Chica’s Cantina Hours of Operation: Sunday–Thursday: 11 a.m.–11 p.m. Friday & Saturday: 11 a.m.–2 a.m.
For menus, updates, and events, follow @ chicascantina on Instagram.
Husband-and-wife team Vikrant Multani and Christian Nava Courtesy photo
Guide Entertainment
Arts&
By Caleb Stultz
Louisville has all kinds of amazing things to do even in one of the chilliest parts of the year. From dance performances to theater, outdoor festivals to film screenings, there is no shortage of fun things to do that are featured in LEO’s guide to arts and entertainment around the city.
Theater and Dance
Tuesday, February 10–Sunday, February 15
The Great Gatsby
Whitney Hall, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | kentuckyperformingarts.org
Saturday, February 21
The Simon and Garfunkel Story Brown Theatre, 315 W. Broadway, Louisville, KY | kentuckyperformingarts.org
Friday, February 27
Urban Bush Women: This is Risk
The Kentucky Center – Bomhard Theater, Louisville, KY | kentuckyperformingarts.org
Festivals
Friday, February 7 – Sunday, February 22
Jewish Film Festival
Trager Family JCC – Shapira Foundation Auditorium, Louisville, KY | jewishlouisville.org
Friday, February 7, 14, 21 & 28
Black History Month Film Series Louisville Free Public Library, Louisville, KY | lfpl.org
Tuesday, February 11–Friday, February 14
National Farm Machinery Show and Championship Tractor Pull
Kentucky Exposition Center, 937 Phillips Ln., Louisville, KY | kentuckyexposition.org
Saturday, February 14
Mardi Gras Live! Fourth Street Live!, Louisville, KY | 4thstlive.com
Saturday, February 14
Destination Smooth Jazz Kentucky Center for African-American Heritage, Louisville, KY | kcah.us
Monday, February 17
A Taste of the Highlands, Mardi Gras Highlands Community Ministries Campus, Louisville, KY | highlandscommunityministries.org
Friday, February 21
Lunar New Year Dinner & Auction Crane House, Louisville, KY | crane-house.org
Tuesday, February 25 – Friday, February 28
Bourbon Classic Louisville, KY | bourbonclassic.com
Saturday, February 28
The 13th Gravy Cup Louisville Slugger Field, Louisville, KY | gravycup.com
Saturday, February 28
Rooted in Black History: The Inaugural Black History Gala Roots 101 African American Museum, Louisville, KY | roots-101.org
Stand Up Comedy
Sunday, February 15
Geoffrey Asmus (21+ Event)
Louisville Comedy Club, 1120 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Wednesday, February 18
Jeff Allen (18+ Event)
Louisville Comedy Club, 1120 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Thursday, February 19
Martin Moreno Louisville Comedy Club, 1120 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Thursday, February 19–Saturday, February 21
Nat Baimel
Caravan Comedy Club, 1125 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 20–Saturday, February 21
K. Trevor Wilson (21+ Event)
Louisville Comedy Club, 1120 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Sunday, February 22
John Crist
Whitney Hall, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Thursday, February 26–Saturday, February 28
Preacher Lawson
Louisville Comedy Club, 1120 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 27–Saturday, February 28
Greg Warren
Caravan Comedy Club, 1125 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Live Music
Saturday, February 14
Serial Killers with Dr. Scott Bonn
Bomhard Theatre, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 14–Friday, March 20
Candlelight:
Featuring Vivaldi’s Four Seasons & More
Actors Theatre of Louisville – Pamela Brown Auditorium, 316 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Sunday, February 15
Abbey Road – Beatles Tribute
Bomhard Theatre, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Tuesday, February 17
Needtobreathe
Brown Theatre | kentuckyperformingarts.org
Wednesday, February 18
Wooli Presents: Synapse
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 20
Cosmic Charlie (18+ Event)
Headliners Music Hall, 1386 Lexington Rd., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Thursday, February 20–Friday, February 21
Louisville Orchestra – Sounds of a New Nation
Whitney Hall, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 20
Saxsquatch – Party Animal 2026
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Saturday, February 21
Colors Worldwide Presents: R&B Only Live (21+ Event)
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Sunday, February 22
INZO – MIRRORVERSE Tour
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Wednesday, February 25
The Lone Bellow
Bomhard Theatre, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Wednesday, February 25
Hooked Like Helen
Mag Bar, 930 E. Market St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Wednesday, February 25
Counting Crows
Freedom Hall, 937 Phillips Ln., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Thursday, February 26
Tab Benoit
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 27
The Ultimate Doors
Historic State Theater Complex, 601 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 27
KPOP DJ Night (18+ Event)
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Friday, February 27
Bloodrave
Headliners Music Hall, 1386 Lexington Rd., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Saturday, February 28
Meghan Patrick
PBR Louisville, 1100 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Saturday, February 28
Louisville Orchestra: Clouds in My Coffee – The Music of Joni Mitchell, Carole King & Carly Simon Whitney Hall, 501 W. Main St., Louisville, KY | kentuckyperformingarts.org
Saturday, February 28
Gimme Gimme Disco (18+ Event)
Headliners Music Hall, 1386 Lexington Rd., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
Saturday, February 28
Club 90s Presents Heated Rivalrave (18+)
Mercury Ballroom, 611 S. 2nd St., Louisville, KY | louisville-theater.com
EAT, DRINK AND SEE IN THIS WEEK’S STAFF PICKS
BY LEO WEEKLY STAFF
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 13
Punk Rock Night Louisville Presents the Friday the 13th Tribute Bash
Seidenfaden’s | 1134 E Breckinridge St.| facebook.com/ seidenfadens| $10 adv/$13 door | 7 p.m. | 21 & over
You’re not going to find a more fitting Friday the 13th show than this. If you missed the sold out Halloween weekend show last year, (or even if you didn’t), here’s your second chance to catch this lineup as Punk Rock Night Louisville brings to the stage Psycho 78 (Louisville Misfits tribute featuring current and former members of The Revenants, Belushi Speed Ball, The JimHärralson, The Wholigans, and Creeps Inc.), along with Hymans (Louisville Ramones tribute band featuring current and former members of Indignant Few, Reagan Youth, Cherub Scourge, Radiokiller, and HexHexHex), and Indianapolis’ Public Animal #9 (a tribute to the original, pre-1975 Alice Cooper group - so Billion Dollar Babies, yes. Welcome To My Nightmare, no). This is going to be one hell of a night!
SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 15
TEN20 Comedy Open Mic Night
TEN20 Craft Brewery | All ages | Free
Catch a night of clean comedy as comics from across the region take the mic at TEN20 Craft Brewery. Grab a craft beer, enjoy food from the kitchen, and settle in for an easygoing evening of laughs.
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 14
The Whenever Show’s Valentine’s Day Ball
Spinelli’s Downtown | 239 S 5th St | instagram.com/ spinellispizzeria | $10 | 6 p.m. | All ages
Expensive dinner? Jewelry? Flowers? That’s all amateur shit! This Valentine’s Day, treat that special someone in your life and/or yourself to the most romantic gift of all: pizza and punk fucking rock!
Begin the night by falling in love with Spinelli’s world-famous NY-style pizza, then join The Whenever Show with Donnie Vagrant (which you should go and watch the entire season one on YouTube right now, especially episode 3), as they bring the love with Vibrolas, The Response, Jane Doe & The Search Party, and Pfeff.
The Whenever Show will be filming for season two, so get your beautiful mug on a TV show! Plus free couples photos and fuck knows what other surprises they’ll have in store. And it’s all ages, so bring the kiddos too! Come and get your love!
TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 17
A Taste of the Highlands: Mardi Gras
Highlands Community Ministries Campus | 21+ | $60 ($15 VIP bourbon add-on)
Laissez les bon temps rouler at this Mardi Gras–inspired tasting event celebrating the flavors of the Highlands. Enjoy bites from local restaurants, cocktails, wine, and beer, plus live Cajun music—all while supporting Highlands Community Ministries and its community programs.
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 14
K-Pop Drag Brunch: Valentine’s Day Edition
High Stakes Rooftop Grill | All ages | $38
Celebrate Valentine’s Day with fierce drag performances, nonstop K-pop hits, and a family-style breakfast spread at High Stakes Rooftop Grill. Expect bold looks, high-energy choreography, and a curated cocktail menu to match the vibes.
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 20
Rude Weirdo, Decline Effect, and Devils
The Whirling Tiger | 1335 Story Ave. | thewhirlingtiger.com | $12 | 8 p.m. | 18 and over
I don’t think you’ll ever find a show featuring more Louisville greats than this right here. Three bands, all of which feature ex-members of damn near all of the greatest punk and hardcore (or adjacent genre) bands in Louisville during the 80s, 90s, and 2000s, all together on one stage for one show. In fact, far too many bands to name (go to the History section of louisvillehardcore.com and look up each band yourself if you must know).
Rude Weirdo brings their unclassifiable strangeness to the stage for the first time since October. Decline Effect returns for their first show in more than five years, and will be playing all new material at that. And the recently resurrected Devils kick things off. Who says old guys can’t rock? Get your ass out of the house for this one!
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 20
Saxsquatch Mercury Ballroom | All ages | $25
The seven-foot-tall, sax-playing cryptid brings his high-energy “Bigfoot Rave”–style performance to Mercury Ballroom. Expect electronic beats, live saxophone, lasers, and plenty of crowd interaction in a show that’s equal parts dance party and spectacle.
FRIDAY AND SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 27 & 28
LDB Fest 2026
Mellwood Art Center | 1860 Mellwood Ave. | ldbbbfest.com | $155.59 two-day pass | 11 a.m. | All ages
If you’re having/plan on attending a wedding at the Mellwood Arts Center on February 27th or 28th, your chances of receiving a windmill kick to the face during said wedding have just gone up substantially. Or at the very least, your wedding music is getting an upgrade.
LDB Fest, one of the largest hardcore festivals in the country, returns to Louisville for its 13th edition, moving this year to the Mellwood Arts Center. Over 30 bands are scheduled to play, including headliners Saves The Day and Terror, with All Out War, Big Boy, Gridiron, On Broke Wings, and many more, including Louisville bands Everybody Dies (featuring Isaac Hale from Knocked Loose), xGAARGOYLEx, Walk Alone, and Who Laughs Last.
There will also be a pre-show at Portal on Thursday night featuring headliners Missing Link and seven other bands, as well as a Friday afterparty at Headliners featuring Nowhere2Run’s Bloodrave.
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 27
WWE Friday Night SmackDown KFC Yum! Center | All ages | $73+
Catch your favorite WWE Superstars live at the KFC Yum! Center for a night of high-flying moves, intense matches, and unforgettable in-ring action. Fans can expect drama, athleticism, and all the excitement that makes SmackDown a must-see experience.
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 28
The 13th Gravy Cup
Louisville Slugger Field | All ages | VIP $70; GA $35
Taste your way through over 30 of the best gravy recipes at this annual competition at Louisville Slugger Field. Sample biscuits and gravy, cheer on amateur and professional chefs, and vote for your favorite to win the People’s Choice Award. VIP attendees get early access starting at 8:30 a.m.
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 27
Isolation Tank Ensemble w/ Sonus Umbra & Ut Gret Mag Bar | All ages | $15
Louisville’s Isolation Tank Ensemble joins Chicago’s prog heavyweights Sonus Umbra and local act Ut Gret for a night of cinematic and experimental progressive rock. Doors open at 8 p.m., with music starting at 8:30 p.m., delivering a multi-sensory experience for fans of complex, atmospheric soundscapes.
SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 28
Gimme Gimme Disco
Headliners Music Hall | All ages | $18
Get ready to dance the night away at Louisville’s ultimate disco party. Spinning ABBA hits and nonstop ’70s and ’80s classics, Gimme Gimme Disco delivers glitter, grooves, and pure feelgood energy for anyone ready to hit the dance floor.
OBLITERATION NEVER FELT SO GOOD!
Q&A WITH OUT.’S DAVE BIRD
The 30th Anniversary Edition of OUT.’s Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs to be released by Noise Pollution on January 30th.
BY JEFF POLK
Memories fade with time, but if you were ever lucky enough to catch OUT. live, you still remember that shit vividly! Their shows were legendary. Chaos seemed to follow them around wherever they were playing. But every once in a while at their shows, you’d get distracted from the violence going on all around you and just happen to notice that there was a group of kids on stage putting every ounce of energy they had into some amazingly powerful songs. A sound that obscured the lines between The Stooges, New Bomb Turks, Black Flag, Bad Brains, and even early AC/DC, with songs that were easy to get into, but impossible to forget. But then you’d catch a stray fist and snap out of it. But for those brief moments, you heard and saw something incredible on that stage. Something that stuck with you for life.
OUT. (stylized in all caps with period) formed in 1994 by guitarist Dave Bird and vocalist Chad Donnelly (who had moved to Louisville from Rhode Island a year or so previously). After some trial and error with their lineup, OUT. really hit their stride with the addition of Russ Pollard on
drums and Tony Bailey on bass. It was with this lineup that the band entered Melody Hill Farm recording studios with recording engineer (and former Kinghorse drummer) Kevin Brownstein over Derby weekend in 1996 to lay down 14 tracks before heading out on tour. Twelve of those songs would be released over a year later on Louisville’s own Noise Pollution as Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs, OUT.’s only full-length record and a living testament to the intense power of the band in their prime.
Both Russ and Tony would leave the band not long after the recording of the album, but Dave and Chad soldiered on with various lineups before calling it a day in 1999. Sadly, Chad Donnelly passed away shortly thereafter in early 2001, followed by Tony Bailey in 2009.
Now, 30 years after the recording of this landmark album, Noise Pollution presents the re-release of Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs. Available on vinyl for the first time ever, the 30th Anniversary Edition has been remastered from the original mixes and features 2 never-before-released songs from the original sessions, newly mixed by original recording engineer Kevin Brownstein, as well as freshly reimagined cover art by original cover artist Catherine Irwin (Freakwater).
In celebration of the re-release, LEO Weekly reached out to Dave Bird for his take on all things OUT.
LEO: You’ve been in the Louisville music scene for over 30 years now and have played in several amazing bands, OUT. being only one of them. For those unfamiliar with you, can you give your musical resume?
Dave Bird: I’ve played with Hedge, OUT., The Ingredient, VRKTM, Speed To Roam, Fire the Saddle, Bad Blood, Health and Happiness Family Gospel Band, Bonnie Prince Billy, Sean Garrison and the Five Finger Discount, The Spurs, Brett Eugene Ralph’s Kentucky Chrome Revue, American Lesions, Bird/Trooper, The Web, Montag, Jaye Jayle, Windago, The Rebaba Group, Wink’s Band, Pink Nasty, George Stearman and Texas Toast, Whiskeydick, and Rude Weirdo, which is my current and longest lived band.
I think I’m forgetting some. A few years ago, I sat down and tried to list everything, and it was closer to 30 bands. It’s possible I could be forgetting something I was a part of for a long time. I’m epileptic, and it’s done very strange things to my memory. I hope I don’t hurt any of my friends’ feelings because I omitted something.
How did this whole reissue project come about? Brandon [Skipworth] and Nathan [Smallwood] asked me what I thought about reissuing the album out of the blue; it really took me by surprise. I told them I’d probably cry tears of joy if they did it. That’s actually already happened a couple of times throughout the process of working on it.
Chad and Tony are among the closest friends I’ve ever had. With both of them no longer with us, revisiting the record has had me pretty emotional at times. More than anything else, this project has been an opportunity to honor their memory, so it’s a really big deal for me.
Do you have any interesting memories from the recording of Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs?
I was impressed with Melody Hill from the second we pulled up to the place. It was a cabin in the country, very idyllic. If I recall correctly, we burned through recording the basic tracks pretty quick. It would have gone even faster, but halfway through recording, Tony decided he wasn’t getting the bass sound he wanted. He didn’t like the big open room his amp was in and decided he wanted to put his cabinet in the backseat of his car. Kevin wasn’t into that idea at all. They went back and forth on it for a while, and Tony wouldn’t let it go. Kevin finally agreed, but it took a while to work out setting his rig back up outside of the studio entirely. I did a handful of overdubs when we were done, and after that, Chad did the vocals. He and Kevin were both really meticulous, so that part took the most time. Kevin asked Chad to give him the lyrics so they could go through it line by line together. After all these years, he still had those handwritten lyric sheets Chad wrote out for him. It was exciting to have them in his
OUT. circa 1996. Chris Higdon
Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs 30th Anniversary Edition vinyl variants by Noise Pollution
Chad Donnelly and Tony Bailey of OUT. circa 1996 Courtesy of OUT
own hand. We got to include them in the record, which I think is really cool. Kevin told me he loved working with Chad because he liked doing a lot of takes. I like knocking stuff out quickly myself. If you come in prepared, I think laboring over takes for hours on end is a drag that seldom results in better results. Both of those guys had strong perfectionist streaks, though. Takes all kinds. I think we did a good job of getting the best of both worlds at Melody Hill.
Are there any reasons behind why “Missed Connection” and “Building a Better Monster” weren’t released until now?
I think the plan may have been to use those songs on another record down the line. Russ and Tony left the band though, so when it came time to record again, we decided to redo “Missed Connection” with the new lineup. We weren’t playing “Building a Better Monster” anymore, so it fell by the wayside to make room for new material.
The album title, Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs, I assume, was inspired by the B.J. Thomas song “(Hey Won’t You Play) Another Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song”. Any particular reason this was chosen for the album title?
Chad came up with that one. We’d been mulling over names for a while. He asked if I was familiar with the BJ Thomas song and suggested it as a possible title. I grew up hearing it on the radio and always loved it. The title just really fit perfectly; that’s exactly what most of those songs are. We couldn’t have said it better ourselves, so we didn’t.
The inner sleeve picture was taken from inside a car that is about to cross a bridge. Is there a story behind that picture?
Well, we did a lot of touring, so for me it’s a nod to that. I really like the loaf of bread on the dashboard. I’m not sure we ever broke even on a tour, so things like peanut butter sandwiches were a staple. There’s probably a 50/50 chance that loaf of bread was stolen. We had several food scams; go to a motel in the morning and hit the continental breakfast. In general, third shift gas station clerks couldn’t care less if someone shoplifts food. Cracker Barrel just begs for it. You eat, then pretend you’re shopping in their little store and leave one at a time. You have to pay the tip, though. Cash on the table. If you were to try to do this stuff now, I’d
recommend being a lot more cautious in today’s age of omnipresent surveillance. Anyway, I gave Nathan all the old pictures I had, and he selected that one. I think he picked up a kind of looking back thing going on in the image that felt appropriate. It’s pretty Double Nickels on the Dime, though I have to wonder if that’s what whoever took the picture was seeing.
In the liner notes of the reissue, you mention you have not spoken with Russ Pollard in years. Was he not involved with this reissue? No, unfortunately, we weren’t able to contact Russ to work on the reissue with us.
Not too long after he left OUT., Russ joined Sebadoh and moved to LA. He also started a band out there called Everest that did really well and kept him out there for a long time. Neil Young put out a record of theirs and took them on tour.
At one point, Russ sent me a picture of his band taking a bow with Neil at Madison Square Garden after everyone came out on stage to play “Keep On Rockin’ In The Free World” to close the show. It was cool as shit. We just lost touch over the years, which seems like a natural thing that can happen when you live across the country from someone, I guess. I actually did manage to touch base with him after the record was finished to tell him about it, which was great. He was excited to hear it. I didn’t get the impression he was upset that he wasn’t involved.
The band Hedge was a precursor to OUT. in that you, Tony Bailey, and Russ Pollard were all involved with that band as well. Yet, each of you played different instruments in OUT. than you did in Hedge. Given that the two bands sound very different from one another, was this done on purpose?
The reason the bands sound so different is that Ryan Stratton was the primary songwriter in Hedge. All of us switching instruments in OUT. wasn’t necessarily intentional. It started with me giving it a whirl on guitar, but there was never any discussion about everyone switching instruments. Tony, Russ, and I all lived together when Chad and I decided to start the band, so those guys joining happened naturally. Russ liked the songs and was interested in playing drums in a band. We played our first show with another guy on bass, but Tony was there. The other guy flaked a couple months after the show, and Tony offered to join. He played bass because we needed a bass player. Of course
we jumped at the chance to have him. Since we all lived together and had a 24-hour rehearsal spot five minutes from our apartment, the three of us were playing together nonstop and got super tight really fast. When Tony came to his first practice with us I asked if he wanted me to walk him through the parts of a song. He said it would probably be easiest if we just played and had him join in. So we start a song, and he played the entire thing perfectly. Then
we played the rest of our set, and he knew it all. This was after seeing us one time two months prior. He hadn’t heard a recording or anything; there was no recording to hear. That was the moment I realized he was operating on a different level than anyone else I knew. He had perfect pitch; it was crazy. I always tell this story…I was driving with him once, someone honked their horn, and Tony said, “Man, I love F#.” I thought he was bullshitting for a while, but it was legit. You could play any note, and without any kind of visual reference, he’d tell you what it was. The guy was a prodigy; he was 15 when we made Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs.
OUT. was known to have some rather crazy live shows. Are there any particular shows that stick out in your mind for being wild?
I could tell crazy show stories all day long. A lot of them I don’t even like to recall; they were so violent, though. I look back on that stuff now with a little discomfort because I’m not a violent person at all. Really, I wonder how I managed to deal with how out of control things would get for as long as I did. There used to be a zine called Maximum Rocknroll that put out an issue every year called Book Your Own Fucking Life. It listed contact info for venues that booked punk bands in pretty much every city in the country. That’s how we booked our tours because we just didn’t know any other way to do it. It worked great, but it would also land us in some really sketchy environments. Chad was a really abrasive guy too, that definitely didn’t help. Someone threatened us with a shotgun in Houston once. Sometimes we’d be compelled to fight if we got booked somewhere we shouldn’t have been, then we’d have to cut and run before we got seriously beat down. It got really scary sometimes.
I busted my hand open before a show once, and playing really exacerbated the cut, so I was bleeding pretty profusely. There was a lady in the crowd going buck wild, and when she noticed my hand, she started licking the blood off. I worried about that one for a while.
After we played in Cincinnati once, we heard Mudhoney was playing across the street, so we went out to see if we could get in and walked into a full-blown riot. Some Nazis had assaulted some queer folks, and the shit hit the fan. There were cops in riot gear hitting people with batons and all that. Didn’t get to see Mudhoney, but Chad managed to sneak in with all the madness happening in the street.
There were a lot of crazy, in a good way, experiences too. Like just getting wild, people hanging from the rafters kind of stuff, but when someone asks for a crazy OUT. story, the first things that come to mind are pretty dark. It’s kind of embarrassing.
Road stories, I know you have some. Can you give us any from your time touring with OUT.? I guess this ties into the last question, but here’s some more. This is actually a fun one. We played at a place in Austin that we didn’t realize was a gay bar until we walked in. Like it was obvious, there’s beefcake all over the walls, the bartender’s shirtless, leather daddies everywhere. With our name, that happened more than once. So we get there really early and load our stuff in and since we had a lot of time to kill, we decide to check out the town. Greg Livingston was in the band at the time, and he says he’s gonna stick around and just chill at the bar. The rest of us all leave. A couple hours later, we come back and Greg is pumped. He’s like “This show is going to rule, these people are awesome. Everyone is super nice, I haven’t paid for a single drink.” We were like, “Well, yeah, man, look around. This is a gay bar; they’re all hitting on you.” He had no idea. We watched as the realization set in; it was great. He was right though. It was an awesome show. We toured with Pat McClimans’ band Tramlaw quite a bit. Those guys were awesome. I really love Pat. I used to ride in their van instead of ours because they were a ton of fun. They had a Nintendo and a vhs player in their van, so we’d be playing Zelda and watching Live At Pompeii while everyone was fighting in the OUT. van. My friend Greg Wells recently told me a story that I never knew about because I was with Tramlaw when it happened. Greg used to tour with us and sell merch and do whatever else. Apparently, during a particularly nasty fight in the van, Chad and Matt Odenweller pulled knives
on each other. That was as far as it went, but Greg was so convinced something catastrophic was going to happen that he left us when we stopped and stayed in a men’s shelter for the night. That was preferable and safer than being with us. It’s baffling to me now that we continued playing shows when there was that level of violence in the band. We were certainly all traumatized people. I think it’s possible that kind of shared experience bonded us as much as it kept us at each other’s throats. I don’t have any other explanations, really.
How/when/where/why the hell did OUT. end up on the same bill as Kid Rock? And how did the crowd react?
[Ed. Note: The Wikipedia page for Kid Rock’s Devil Without a Cause tour lists the date of this show as October 14, 1998.]
The Toy Tiger used to have shows on Wednesday nights, and we became a kind of go-to for the club promoter when they needed an act for a last-minute booking for one. We said yes every time they asked because it was so much fun playing there. In my mind, the Toy Tiger had Louisville’s all-time greatest room to see and play a show in. It sounded fantastic in there, and it had tiered seating, so even if you were sitting at a table in the very back, you saw everything. There was a dance floor in front of the stage if you wanted to dance or be right up front. I’ve never understood why that’s not the standard setup for clubs everywhere. Those Wednesday night shows usually had events like a wet t-shirt contest that would happen after the show, too, so the whole experience was a real bizarro and seedy spectacle. We played with traveling tribute bands there a few times. I particularly liked an AC/DC band called Hell’s Bells. They were spot on, and their Angus was like 6’8”, which filled me with glee for some reason. He had the schoolboy uniform and everything; it ruled. It was for one of these shows that
we were asked if we wanted to play with this guy, Kid Rock. They were selling him to us as someone who was going to blow up as soon as his record came out. None of us had heard of him, but we didn’t need to be sold; it was a show at the Toy Tiger. The only thing I remember about it is that I didn’t make it through a single song of his. It was too embarrassing to watch, so I went home. The great Brian Schreck was playing bass with us then; he and I still laugh about it when we see each other. They were right about Kid Rock blowing up, though, he played Louisville Gardens his next time through not even a year later.
Any chance you’d get together with Russ and/ or some other people to play OUT. songs again, even if it’s just a one-time thing?
Never say never, but I’ve already done it twice before. I’m guessing the first time was in 2006 or 2007. It was Matt Odenweller, Greg Livingston, Tony, and myself. All of us had played in the band, so despite Chad being gone, it still felt like a reunion. That show was bonkers. Someone smashed a bottle on the floor as soon as we started playing, and that set the tone for the whole thing. I spent half the show being picked up and carried around. Then, a few years after that, maybe 2011 or 2012, my friend Nick Smith contacted me and said he was looking to get a crew together to do an OUT. set, and he needed a singer. I didn’t know him at all at the time, which made it all the more flattering for me. He had assembled a great group, too. Tony Ash was playing bass and Matt Jaha, who we also lost too soon, was playing drums. Matt was having problems at the time and couldn’t make rehearsals, so we got Eric McManus on board. They all knew the songs inside and out, and we all clicked immediately. We had so much fun that we decided to continue on with new material. That’s how the band American Lesions started.
I considered doing another tribute set for the record release. I ran it by the Lesions guys, but Nick had a lot on his plate, and Eric moved back to Philly. At this point, I don’t even know who else I would ask that might be interested. I’m also getting up there in years. I read an interview with David Yow when The Jesus Lizard got back together, where he was saying these days he had to get in the gym and train in order to perform their songs correctly. That would definitely be the case for me doing an OUT. show anymore; it takes a lot of energy to do it right. I also don’t have any kind of rage fuel these days, thankfully. I wouldn’t
want to risk tarnishing the name of the band by being a poser.
For you personally, is there a definitive OUT. song or songs that stand out amongst the rest? That’s a good question. I’ll go with “You Destroy Me.” It’s probably the best example of what we called pinky rock, which just meant Chuck Berry guitar licks that require using your pinky finger. Picking it up and putting it down is all there is to it. It’s a Keith Richards and Johnny Thunders move. Any bonehead that wants to play guitar can play ass-kicking pinky rock within a half hour of picking up the instrument, so of course I did it all the time. When we started OUT., the extent of my guitar playing ability was three-chord folk songs I’d play in my bedroom. Guitar was just a vehicle for me to be able to sing old songs I liked. I probably never would have pursued it beyond that if Chad wasn’t really enthusiastic about the stuff I wrote. Discovering something so simple, effective, and definitively rock n’ roll in those early days was like getting the keys to the kingdom. So yeah, “You Destroy Me” really captured the spirit of the band.
Whether OUT.-related or otherwise, do you have any future plans or anything you’d like to promote?
We’re throwing a listening party for the record release at Surface Noise on January 30th. I’m on pins and needles looking forward to it. In addition to songs from the record, I’m putting together a playlist of songs from other projects that the band members played on. Between Russ, Tony, and myself, there’s a lot to choose from. Nathan, Brandon, and I are also going to be on Joey Mudd’s awesome radio show, The Deep End, to discuss the record and all things Noise Pollution. Also, Rude Weirdo is playing at the Whirling Tiger on February 20th with Decline Effect and Devils. As always, we will be in accordance with the pillars for being a great band with a heavy focus on Amuse Yourself and Looks.
OUT.’s Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Songs 30th Anniversary Edition is available in both “Obliteration Red” and “Golden Forked Marble” limited edition colored vinyl, and as a digital download from Noise Pollution’s website at noisepollution.bandcamp.com.
1996. Chris Higdon
LOUISVILLE NATIVE ACCEPTED TO INTERNATIONAL OPERA PROGRAM
BY DEBRA MURRAY
Theo Harrah, has been selected as one of the 28 artists from a pool of more than 1,500 international applicants to participate in the Merola Opera Program’s 2026 cohort. Credit: Zachary Burnell
Louisville native Theo Harrah has been selected as one of the 28 artists from a pool of more than 1,500 international applicants to participate in the Merola Opera Program’s 2026 cohort.
This year’s cohort of participants comes from Australia, China, South Korea, Türkiye, and the United Kingdom, as well as across North America, including the United States, Mexico, and Canada, according to the Merola Opera Program.
San Francisco’s Merola Opera Program is one of the most prestigious opera training programs in the world for aspiring singers, pianists, and stage directors, where participants attend master classes and private coaching. There are also parts of the program that teach the participants about PR, financial planning, and skills beyond honing their craft that will benefit them throughout their careers.
“Up-and-coming Opera stars”
All participants will be involved in or performing at the Meola Summer Festival this upcoming summer. The festival showcases the “up-and-coming Opera stars” of this year’s cohort. The dates for the festival have not been announced.
“I find that it’s because I’m then positioned around a bunch of new people who are really performing at a very high level,” Harrah said. “Merola is a strictly young artist program, so being around a lot of young artists who are really successful, really working hard, and really wanting other paths is very inspiring for me. It’s been inspiring me to work harder. But additionally, you get constant access to coaches.”
Harrah is currently pursuing a Master of Music degree in Vocal Performance at the Indiana University Jacobs School of Music, under the expert guidance of Professor Jane Dutton.
“Fortunately, all the Jacobs and grand removal opportunities gave me performance experience that I don’t think I would have had otherwise. Without them, I don’t think I would have been able to do something like this,” Harrah said. Harrah attended the Kentucky School of Performing Arts in Louisville before attending Indiana University.
“I’ve always been caught between calling myself a music kid and a theater kid,” Harrah said. “But I really think I’m a theater kid at heart. I still love musical theater and plays just as much as I love classical music.”
What makes opera special to Theo Harrah To Harrah, what makes opera special is how it combines all of the things he enjoys about other forms of art, like the costumes and dance, to create the performance.
“I really think that opera is special in the way that it is a combination of almost all the art forms in my brain,” Harrah said. “There are the visual arts of the sets and the costumes. There is a theatrical art of acting itself, of course, on stage and telling a story. There’s a musical aspect where you get such a wide berth of music with so many different rich colors and such a rich history of music within it, as well as, you know, even dance and movement as being a large part of the music being a large part of the performance.”
In comparison to musical theatre, opera careers typically take off later due to voice maturation. While Harrah can practice his singing now and learn the skills necessary, it will take years for his voice to fully mature and be able to start a career.
“Being an opera singer is really difficult because it’s a very much a waiting game,” Harrah said. “There’s an adage that, like the voice ages 10 years behind the body, so where, like a musical theater performer might be able to go out at 21, 22 years old, and start a career. For an opera singer is a lot harder, and the lower and louder, than wait the longer it takes for that, for that maturity period to occur. So I know for me, it’s a long time before I could really get started on a career.”
“I really think that opera is special in the way that it is a combination of almost all the art forms in my brain.”
Harrah’s supportive parents and access to art in Louisville have led him to his numerous performance opportunities and now one of the most notable training programs.
“I’m always very appreciative of all the people in my life that made you this moment, you know, my parents, and also all the artistic traditions I’ve had from a very young age,” Harrah said. “I’ve just been super fortunate to be in a situation where I’ve always been able to pursue my art and theater, always been in a super important situation, to live in a place like Louisville and we have access to like the Governor’s School for the Arts, or the Youth Performing Arts School, where I always had a support system of people really believed in me and were really able to give me resources and guidance that I needed to get ready to go.”
Why support for local arts is imperative for the arts nationwide
Harrah encourages anyone interested in learning about opera or who is trying to introduce themselves to the art to go see a live show. Additionally, he encourages people to go support local art because that is what makes national
art like Broadway possible.
“Supporting musical and local playhouses is what makes Broadway so possible,” Harrah said.
“I really encourage people to go and see live art, live theater, live dance, and go to an art gallery. Those kinds of things are really important for our culture and the world at large. When it happens at a local level, it’s going to succeed at a natural level, I think that, because of all the art that surrounded me growing up, which is what let me be able to do what I do now.”
By viewing local plays or other types of art, people are often able to see subjects or pieces that can’t be replicated in other places or on a large scale.
“People travel to New York, or they’ll travel wherever those people always play, but they don’t realize that they’re happening just outside of their back door,” Harrah said.
“There are so many things out there. On a small scale, so many pieces of art can be created that can’t necessarily be done in big places.”
Theo Harrah, has been selected as one of the 28 artists from a pool of more than 1,500 international applicants to participate in the Merola Opera Program’s 2026 cohort. Zachary Burnell
WATCH THESE ADORABLE GOATS SPRINT TO THE FINISH AT NULU BOCK FEST THIS YEAR
Louisville’s beloved spring festival takes over NuLu on March 28 with free admission, baby goat races, local beer, family activities, and a full slate of pre-parties
BY CALEB STULTZ
NuLu’s most delightfully bizarre custom has returned. The NuLu Business Association has announced the return of NuLu Bock Fest, marking its ninth year of goat racing, bock beer, bratwurst, and neighborhood-wide celebration on Saturday, March 28, from noon to 6 p.m. The public is welcome and admission is free.
NuLu Bock Fest, which has its roots in a mid-19th-century German custom honoring the release of bock beer following winter aging, has developed into one of Louisville’s most notable spring celebrations. NuLu continues to be the only sensible location for a festival that incorporates live music, food trucks, local vendors, adult and baby goat racing, and the neighborhood’s
appropriately named Nanny Goat Strut and Billy Goat Strut.
The Louisville Aggies, a local 4-H organization, will once again assist in leading the goats down the track at the beloved Jefferson County Farm Bureau Goat Races, sponsored by Sunny Acres Farm. With 12 races planned throughout the day, starting at noon with the National Anthem and a flyover and ending at 6 p.m., grandstands will line the course for better viewing.
The featured race is the News Flash Dash Baby Goat Race, which occurs at 3:30 p.m., where local TV anchors, reporters, and meteorologists pick a baby goat to race for a charity.
The winning goat receives a $500 donation for the charity of “its choice,” according to a release from NuLu Bock Fest.
Confirmed NuLu Bock Fest Pre-Parties:
• Saturday, February 21: Baby Goat Pre-Party, Noon–4 p.m., Whiskey Thief Distilling Co.
• Saturday, March 7: Tailspin Ale Fest, 2–7 p.m., Bowman Field
• Saturday, March 14: St. Patrick’s Day Parade, Noon–2 p.m., Bardstown Road
• Saturday, March 21: Baby Goat Yoga, 10–11 a.m., Taj 811
• Saturday, March 21: Paddock Party, Noon–5 p.m., Garage Bar
• Tuesday, March 24: Wurst Fest, 6–8 p.m., Copper & Kings
• Friday, March 27: The NuLu 502 Packet Pick-Up, 4–7 p.m., Whiskey Thief Distilling Co.
• Friday, March 27: Goat Calling Contest, 6–8 p.m., High Horse
For full details, visit nulu.org/BockFest and follow @nuluofficial on Instagram and Facebook.
FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
February 1-28
ROB BREZSNY
ARIES (March 21-April 19): “The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them,” wrote Ernest Hemingway. This Valentine season, I propose you experiment with his approach. Take a smart risk with people who have shown glimmers of reliability but whom you haven’t fully welcomed. Don’t indulge in reckless credulity, just courageous and discerning openness. Be vulnerable enough to discover what further connection might bloom if you lead with faith rather than suspicion. Your willingness to believe in someone’s better nature may help bring it forth.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Taurus singer Barbra Streisand addressed her legendary perfectionism. She said that truly interesting intimacy became available for her only after she showed her dear allies her full array of selves, not just her shiny, polished side. In alignment with astrological omens, I encourage you to experiment with the daring art of unfinished revelation. Let the people you care for witness you in the midst of becoming. Share your uncertainties, your halfformed thoughts, and your works in progress. Surprise! Your flaws may prove as endearing as your achievements.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Author Anaïs Nin wrote, “Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” I believe this understanding of camaraderie should be at the heart of most Geminis’ destinies. It’s your birthright and your potential superpower to seek connections with people who inspire you to think thoughts and feel feelings you would never summon by yourself. You have an uncanny knack for finding allies and colleagues who help you unveil and express more of your total self. Now is a good time to tap further into these blessings.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Poet David Whyte said that “heartbreak is unpreventable.” It’s “the natural outcome of caring for people and things over which we have no control.” But here’s the redemptive twist:
Your capacity to feel heartbreak proves you have loved well. Your shaky aches are emblems of your courageous readiness to risk closeness and be deeply affected. So let’s celebrate your tender heart not despite its vulnerability but because of it. You should brandish your sensitivity as a superpower.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Choreographer Twyla Tharp said she fell in love with her husband partly because “he was the only person who didn’t seem impressed by me.” I will extrapolate from that to draw this conclusion: Our most valuable allies might show their most rigorous respect by seeing us clearly. This Valentine season, Leo, I invite you to test the hypothesis that being thoroughly known and understood is more crucial than being regularly praised and flattered. Enrich your connections with the perceptive souls who love you not for your highlight reel but for your raw, genuine self.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The famously kind and caring author Anne Lamott confessed, “I thought such awful thoughts that I cannot even say them out loud because they would make Jesus want to drink gin straight out of the cat dish.” That’s a liberating insight. She revealed that even kind, caring people like her harbor messy internal chaos. This Valentine season, Virgo, I dare you to share a few of your less-than-noble thoughts with soulful characters whom you trust will love you no matter what. Let them see that your goodness coexists with your salty imperfections. Maybe you could even playfully highlight the rough and rugged parts of you for their entertainment value. What’s the goal? To deepen spirited togetherness.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): How do we eagerly and daringly merge our fortunes with another person while maintaining our sovereign selfhood? How do we cultivate interesting togetherness without suppressing or diluting our idiosyncratic beauty? In some respects, this is a heroic experiment that seems almost impossible. In other respects, it’s the best work on the planet for anyone who’s brave enough to attempt it. Luckily for you Libras,
this is potentially one of your superpowers. And now is an excellent time to take your efforts to the next level of heartful grittiness.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Here’s a quote by the character Carrie Bradshaw from the TV show Sex and the City: “The most exciting, challenging, and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you that you love, that’s fabulous.” I invite you to make this a prime meditation, Scorpio. To begin, get extra inspired by your own mysterious beauty: captivated by your own depths, fascinated by your mysterious contradictions, and delighted by your urge for continual transformation. The next step is to identify allies and potential allies who appreciate the strange magnificence you treasure in yourself. Who devoutly wants you to fulfill your genuine, idiosyncratic soul’s code? Spend the coming weeks enriching your connections with these people.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): This Valentine season, I propose that you infuse your intimate life with a fun dose of playful curiosity. Visualize your beloved allies, both current and potential, as unfolding mysteries rather than solved puzzles. Ask them provocative questions you’ve never thought to ask before. Wonder aloud about their simmering dreams and evolving philosophies. (Brezsny’s Togetherness Rule #1: Iwhen you think you’ve figured someone out completely, the relationship withers.) In fact, let’s make this one of your assignments for the next five months: Heighten and nurture your nosiness about the beautiful people you love. Treat each conversation as an expedition into unexplored territory. (Brezsny’s Togetherness Rule #2: A great way to stoke their passion for you and your passion for them is to believe there’s always more to discover about each other.)
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Ecologists studying symbiosis know that successful partnerships aren’t always between similar organisms. Some bonds link the fortunes of radically different creatures, like clownfish
and sea anemones or oxpeckers and buffalo. Each supplies resources or protection the other lacks, often assuring they live more successfully together than they would on their own. This is useful information for you right now. At least one of the allies you need looks nothing like you. Their genius is orthogonal to yours, or they have skills you don’t. The blend may not be comfortable, but I bet it’s the precise intelligence you need to achieve what you can’t accomplish alone.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Poet Mary Oliver asked her readers, “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” This Valentine season, I propose a collaborative version of this prod: Ask those you care for to help you answer Oliver’s question, and offer to help them answer it for themselves. Now is an excellent time to act on the truth that vibrant intimacy involves the two of you inspiring each other to fulfill your highest callings. Do whatever it takes to make both of you braver and bolder as you learn more about who you are meant to be.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Can you care for stressed people without making it your duty to rescue them? Can you offer support without being taken advantage of? I hope so, Pisces. Life is inviting you to be more skilled about expressing your love without compromising your own interests. How? First, offer affection without signing up for endless service. Second, don’t let your empathy blur into entanglement. Third, monitor your urge to care so it doesn’t weaken your sovereignty. Your gift for soothing others’ struggles evokes my deep respect, but it’s most effective when it’s subtle and relaxed. Give people room to carry out their own necessary work.
Homework: What fresh, bold action on behalf of love could you take?
Newsletter.FreeWillAstrology.com
freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com BrezsnyAstrology@gmail.com
QUICKIES
BY DAN SAVAGE
Hey Dan: I’m an 81-year-old heterosexual woman whose husband died last May. I have found that my 56-year-old gardener of fifteen years can make me sexually happy. But now after four months he says he’s not respecting his wife by having sex with me. He relates this to going to a Catholic priest for confession. He seems to enjoy our sex. What should I tell him?
“You’re fired.”
P.S. Kidding, kidding — don’t fire your gardener. Tell him you’re grateful for the sexual happiness, you don’t want him to do anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, and then give him a raise.
P.P.S. Will no one free us from these meddlesome priests?
Hey Dan: What is the most frequently asked question you get?
Hard to say — but I suspect I’ll get a lot more questions like the one above as my readership ages along with me.
Hey Dan: I have a boyfriend who never asks for anything. He also never says “I love you.” Do you think this is a red flag?
It depends on how long you’ve been seeing this guy. If you’ve only been seeing him for a few weeks — especially if you haven’t had a DTR convo and your use of “boyfriend” is the relationship equivalent of grade inflation — the fact that he isn’t asking you to pick up his dry cleaning (just this once) or peg his ass (on the regular) could be seen as a green flag, e.g. he doesn’t expect you to do girlfriend grunt work before you’re BF/GF official. Same goes for saying “I love you”: if you’re still in the early stages, he may be feeling it, he may be thinking about saying it, but waiting until he’s sure before he says it? Another green flag… if the relationship is still relatively new.
But if it’s been a year and he doesn’t ask you for anything (and doesn’t offer anything) and he doesn’t say “I love you” (or stopped saying “I love you”), then we’re in red flag territory.
Hey Dan: Best creative positions for pregnant people?
There aren’t good positions that work for all non-pregnant people — some positions/angles of penetration work for some people but not for others — and experimentation with different positions is the best way to find the positions that work for you as an individual and a couple. I assume the same is true of pregnant people: some positions/angles of penetration work for some and not for others, and experimentation is the best way to figure out which ones — creative or not — work best for you right now. (And congrats!)
Hey Dan: Why do guys who wanna get pegged refuse to douche/prepare? What to do in those cases?
Peg a guy who doesn’t prepare once, shame on him. Peg a guy who doesn’t prepare twice, shame on you.
P.S. In fairness, some straight guys don’t know how to prepare; their girlfriends/wives/Dommes should direct them to one of the five million douching tutorials on YouTube. In cases where a guy has been directed to online douching tutorials and he still isn’t cleaning out properly… that guy doesn’t deserve to be pegged.
Hey Dan: What amount of jealousy/insecurity in a poly relationship is okay?
“What matters most is not so much the amount of jealousy/insecurity, but the way it’s handled,” said Dr. Marie Thouin. “If someone grapples with jealousy but they’re staying on the same team with their partner(s), that’s okay; but if someone feels so disempowered that they start seeing their partner as an enemy, something needs to change.”
Dr. Marie Thouin is a dating and relationship coach who has extensively researched and written about compersion. Follow her on Instagram @ drmariethouin.
Hey Dan: Can lesbians please stop being so mad at me for being bi? I just want to have sex with a woman and not lie about my sexuality on my dating profile. I promise I don’t make being bi my whole personality.
You encounter two types of people on dating/ hookup apps: people who are there to fuck people who wanna fuck them and people who are there to complain about (and complain at) people they don’t wanna fuck and/or people who don’t wanna fuck them. Yes, it sucks when a stranger goes out of their way to say something shitty to you on a hookup app; there are lots of shitty people everywhere, and some of them are lesbians. But your best move is to block shitty people and then refrain — as hard as it might be — from blaming all lesbians everywhere for the shitty behavior of a few lesbians on the apps.
P.S. You know who’s never mad at bisexual women for being bisexual women? Other bisexual women! You have options!
Hey Dan: You never write about a hair fetish, let alone a fetish for completely bald heads. Because I’m a guy who’s very much turned on by women with smooth, shiny heads. And I’m not the only guy who has this fetish. What do you say about this?
I would say… you shouldn’t read anything into my not having written something about your particular fetish. I’m aware that some men like women with smooth, shiny heads, and it’s a perfectly fine fetish for a man to have. If it hasn’t come up in the column, that’s because no one has sent me a letter about it.
Hey Dan: I’m a cis bi female in my 40s married to a cis bi male in his 50s. He came out to me last year as bi, which was a HUGE surprise and incredibly rad. We have started to explore non-monogamy, and he has been on the apps looking for a male FWB and not having much luck. I’ve heard you mention things that were “gay coded” in the 1990s, like tribal armband tattoos. If a man my husband’s age wears earrings and has a 90s tribal armband tattoo and wears rainbow bi pride bracelets, etc., will he set off anyone’s gaydar? Is there anything else he can do?
Your husband’s earrings, tattoos, and pride bracelets may get him clocked as a cocksucker — they may set off other people’s gaydar — but they’re highly unlikely to get him laid. If a gay or bi dude sees your husband in public and thinks 1. he’s hot and 2. he must be gay or bi given those earrings, that tattoo, those bisexual bracelets, etc., that guy is more likely to open up Grindr or Sniffies or Scruff and send your husband a message — if he finds him there — than he is to approach your husband on the street and risk making a pass at him.
Hey Dan: I’m a bisexual nonbinary person in my late 20s. I use gender-neutral pronouns in the workplace and on my legal documents. However, my family members don’t seem to believe me. I’ve asked my parent and my sibling to use my preferred pronouns multiple times, and they just laugh it off. I’ve tried GNC hairstyles, and I dress pretty GNC; that doesn’t seem to help. Their behavior feels dismissive, but I know they love me, which makes me hesitant to be firmer with them.
I don’t understand why you would hesitate to be rude to your family — sorry: why would you hesitate to be firm with your family — given that your family is rude to you. That said, you’re not Tinkerbell: you don’t need them to believe. I got a
lot of, “Oh, you just need to meet the right girl,” from my extended family after I came out, which felt dismissive and disrespectful. My strategy was to make fun of them for being straight (“You just need to meet the right guy, Uncle Jerry”) and — if they kept it up — to describe what I loved about gay sex in graphic detail. I’m not sure what the equivalent move for a nonbinary person might be (describing your last haircut in graphic detail doesn’t have the same punch), but the general lesson applies: respect earns respect.
Hey Dan: There are a million think pieces on how and why people — men and women — are obsessed with Heated Rivalry but no one has really touched on the power of a long-term, soft Dom/sub dynamic, like the one Ilya and Shane have. We need your analysis!
My analysis: it’s fucking hot when Ilya orders Shane around (“Get on your knees”) and Heated Rivalry shows us that a naturally skilled Dom like Ilya can give orders and still check in (“This okay?”) without ruining the D/s vibe.
Hey Dan: How can I make sex more spontaneous?
Planning to have more spontaneous sex seems a little contradictory — like, doesn’t planning to have more unplanned sexual encounters highlight the fact that the best sex is planned? I suppose you could make a plan to spend time together in a place where you can’t or shouldn’t have sex and then go ahead and have sex in that place… but it’s still a plan, isn’t it?
Hey Dan: I’m getting ready for a 1950s-themed gay speed dating party. How should I prepare?
“What a great idea for a party!,” said James Kirchick, the author of Secret City: The Hidden History of Gay Washington, the definitive book about gay life — in and out of Washington — at the height of the Lavender Scare in the 1950s. “Put aside the fear and repression that marked the decade and dress in something sexy but furtive — think Timmy from Fellow Travelers — and if you really want to stand out, accentuate your outfit with a paperback copy of Washington Confidential, a muckraking report on our capital’s seedier side. The top bestselling nonfiction book of the summer of 1951, it has an entire chapter devoted to the city’s debauched homosexual underground entitled ‘Garden of Pansies.’ Though intended to outrage hetero readers, the book became an unintentional guide to the city’s gay scene for budding gay guys and gals.”
Follow James Kirchick on Instagram and Twitter Find out more about his work — his essays, his journalism, and his books — at jameskirchick.com
Hey Dan: Thoughts on guys saying, “I love you, bro,” or, “I love you, daddy,” during sex?
So long as no one is saying, “I love you, bro,” to their actual brother during sex or, “I love you, daddy,” to their actual father during sex — and no one is saying that to their actual brother or father — then it’s fine. Just as adults calling each other “baby” during sex doesn’t invoke, endorse, or normalize pedophilia, men calling each other “bro” and “daddy” during sex doesn’t invoke, endorse, or normalize incest.
Hey Dan: Any thoughts on why and when gay men started sniffing butts before rimming? Is this a new fetish?
If there was ever something that needed to pass the smell test, it would be the ass you’re about to eat. I don’t know if this is a “new fetish,” but I sincerely hope it’s not. This is something gay men — at least the ones who eat ass — should’ve been doing all along.
Hey Dan: Your thoughts on Pillion?
Haven’t seen it yet — will soon, I promise!
Hey Dan: Why do some of your callers ask the most obvious questions?
I don’t know, but bless them — no questions, no podcast.
Hey Dan: I’m a 66-year-old heterosexual woman who was married for 33 years and had only had sex with three men until last year when I racked up seven. All casual and it is so much fucking (literally) fun. Here’s my question. I have been having fantasies about a man in my social circle. I am not interested in him romantically, but I find him hot and want to make him a fuck buddy. My reservation is that if it goes sideways, it will be awkward for the friend group. Advice on navigating this?
You’re in your late sixties — or you’re in your early late mid-sixties — and even if this goes sideways (which it might not!), how long would you have to live with the awkwardness? Ten years? Twenty? Thirty tops? Meanwhile, I’m walking around out here feeling awkward about something I did during a dress rehearsal for Oklahoma nearly forty years ago. I learned to live with it, you can too!
Hey Dan: A new partner is not well-endowed. My other partner is. How do I gracefully decline a romantic relationship knowing it will be unsatisfying when I like the person, but I just don’t want sex from him.
You can tell a guy you don’t wanna keep fucking him without telling him precisely why you don’t wanna keep fucking. If this guy insists on knowing the real and actual and true reason you don’t wanna keep fucking him, make something up P.S. The Golden Rule applies here: If a guy didn’t want to keep having sex with you because your pussy was too loose or too tight or too wet or too dry or too busy or too bedazzling… would you want that man to tell you the truth or would you rather he tell you a face-saving, ego-sparing white lie? Do unto others.
Hey Dan: Are there “woman-friendly” glory holes in places that aren’t porn shops? And what is the glory hole etiquette?
Leo Herrera, author of Analogue Cruising and other books, walked his readers through basic glory hole etiquette in a piece he wrote for his newsletter, “Herrera Words.”
As for woman-friendly glory holes… Glory holes in porn shops and truck stops and men’s toilets in university libraries are not “woman-friendly.” And you could argue that since no one would expect a woman to be on the other side of a glory hole in any of those spaces, a woman who got on the other side of one of those glory holes would be guilty of a consent violation — I mean, guys who stick their cocks through holes aren’t exactly choosy about who sucks their cocks, but it’s not unreasonable for them to assume that it will be a man.
The best place to find a “woman-friendly” glory hole — one where the guy sticking his cock through the hole is hoping there’s a woman on the other side — is at a sex club that caters to straight swingers.
Hey Dan: My ex left me for Jesus, got married, and procreated. Any coping tips for me?
Could’ve been worse — your ex could’ve married you, knocked you up, and then found Jesus. So, count your blessings.
Hey Dan: Are we going to be okay?
Depends on your time horizon. Will we make it to tomorrow? I think we will. But I am not placing any bets on 2027.
Got problems? Yes, you do! Email your question for the column to mailbox@savage.love!
Or record your question for the Savage Lovecast at savage.love/askdan!
Podcasts, columns and more at Savage.Love
WHAT’S IT ALL ABOUT?
BY RICH KATZ AND JEFF CHEN
Rich Katz, of Park City, Utah, does freelance work in corporate restructuring and bankruptcy liquidations. Jeff Chen, of Seattle, is a professional puzzlemaker and editor who’s a frequent contributor here. This puzzle started when one of them noticed the double entendre at 86-Across. They thought 116-Across made a nice exclamation point to the theme set.
W.S.
(Previously published)
Across 1 Dressed (in)
5 Facial cream amount
8 Harriet Tubman was one for the Union
11 Place in a pyramid, say
17 Site of the U.S.S. Arizona Memorial
18 Head of a noted animal rescue project
20 Prospectors’ targets
22 ‘‘Take me to your ____’’ (alien demand)
23 TV’s ‘‘Search for the Titanic,’’ for one?
26 Fifth-century conqueror who tried (and failed!) to take Rome
27 Charcuterie assortment
28 It’s hard to see
29 Champagne name
31 Honk
32 Chestnuts
35 Instructions for slaying Dracula?
38 Tibetan beasts
40 Realm
41 Concern in data transmission
42 Shoppers’ conveniences
46 Tributary of the Colorado River
48 Bit of Rasta headwear
49 Tribe along the Missouri River
51 Broadway offering titled with
Ones moving with the music?
70 TED Talk about neuropsychology?
73 Syllables of reproof
75 ‘‘So is this our plan or not?’’
76 Ones whistling while they work?
79 ‘‘May Day is Day in Hawaii’’ (holiday slogan)
80 Like tightwads
81 Poetic tribute 83 Lose ground, say
Scout’s container 86 U-Haul ad?
89 Sister of Hades
90 Picture of Pluto, for instance
92 Org. holding an annual basketball championship since 1939 93 Metaphorical bit of progress
94 Spiced quaff
96 Bud after Jack, perhaps?
99 ____ mind 101 Email thread with a ‘‘Donate
55 What face emojis with hearts for eyes mean
56 Long, long time
57 Roll of green
60 Harmonic R&B subgenre
61 Goaded
62 When doubled, chocolate treat
65 Journalist Holt
66 Herbal supplement used as a cold remedy
68 Condition that may involve repetitive behaviors, for short
69 Dragster
71 Term of endearment
72 It’s a thing
73 R&B trio with the 1999 No. 1 hit ‘‘No Scrubs’’
74 Something blue that follows Black or Red
77 Adam’s apple locale
78 Spanish muralist whose‘‘American Progress’’ is in the lobby of 30 Rockefeller Plaza
80 Welcome at the door
82 Imprint, as a lasting memory
85 Home of Si Racha, where the hot sauce was invented
86 Did some winter riding
87 The third one is often dangerous
88 Roof overhang
90 Computers’ process of storing data
91 Superlative suffix
94 Cylindrical Mexican pastry
95 Actor Mark of ‘‘NCIS’’
97 Yoga type
98 Crowd noise
100 ‘‘Oh, you’re in on this, too?’’
101 Be in charge of, as a committee
102 Substances in sports scandals, familiarly
103 Require
105 Listings on a blogroll
106 In the 1%
107 Decorate
108 Believe it!
112 It’s passed on the way to the bar, for short
115 Keanu’s role in ‘‘The Matrix’’ 117 Classic muscle car
118 Ball
119 Tous ____ jours (every day, in French)
