Issue 7 - CAREGIVER Magazine - Providing Options and Support - Holidays 2019

CAREGIVER Holiday 2019

FREE

Issue 7

PROVIDING OPTIONS AND SUPPORT

Let Gratitude Shine Bright this

Holiday Season!

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CONTENT

Gratitude Pie 08 A Holiday Recipe

Moving Fast, 10 Past Our Past

Analog Traditions in a Digital Age

ASK Lisa 12

About Estate Planning

Eunice Khoury 16

Well Preserved Continues to Serve

8

28 Surfacing

Upcoming Events

Giving, Receiving 20 & Grieving Wholeness at the Holidays

Better Late Than Never 22 Hospice, A Labor of Love

G

By Lisa

The Challenges of PTSD

A Norman Christmas Story 31 Santa’s Boots Through the Eyes of a Child

34 Veteran’s Day 2019 A Tealridge Tribute

35 The Book A Profoundly Useful Tool

Save The Date 18

Rem

38 Learn Herbal Alternatives Cinnamon Battles High Blood Pressure

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40 Proceed With Caution Careful Consumption

44 Remember When Holiday Celebrations

Vicki Muir, Licensed Clinical Social Worker

46 A Norman Christmas Story Return of a Yule Time Tradition

For info. contact: 405-308-6433

CAREGIVER

46

Issue 7

Holiday 2019

PROVIDING

FREE

RT ND SUPPO OPTIONS A

this Let Gratitude Shine Bright

Holiday Season!

4

On the Cover:

We are blessed with another of my dear friend, and amazingly talented photographer, Jessie Newell’s beautiful images for the front cover. The Newell family does so much to support our soldiers and Veterans, their WE CARE Christmas Project provides a much needed (and deserved) gift bag for every Veteran living in a VA senior community in the State of Oklahoma. Jessie is a true patriot and I am honored to fight for good and just causes alongside her. This cover expresses all my warm holiday emotions rolled together in one photo like holding a mug of hot cocoa in front of a crackling fire. Thank you for contributing your iconic imagery to this 48-page Christmas card to our CAREGIVER readers!

member When?

Gratitude Pie

a Sydnor

By Vicki Muir

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6

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Preserving your health, wealth & the freedom to live life the way you choose!

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Eunice Khoury has been an independent insurance agent since 1989. She is licensed in Oklahoma, Arkansas, Kansas, Tennessee and Texas. Eunice specializes in: Medicare Long-Term Care Retirement Options Life Insurance

Patrick Munnerlyn is an Investment Advisor Representative. Through Patrick we can now offer investment recommendations and portfolio management for either a flat fee or a percent under management. Patrick also specializes in Medicare and gives unbiased expertise in health insurance - which is critical in these changing times of healthcare.

If you have not prepared yourself for life events like illness, retirement living/assisted living cost or just making sure you don't outlive your money, the Well Preserved Advisory Group can help!

Annual Enrollment is Oct. 15th - Dec. 7th 405-606-4893 or visit www.wellpreserved.info 4800 North Mayfair Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

7

Gratitude Pie By Vicki Muir

Across time cultures have had ceremonies and activities to celebrate the abundance and blessings of the previous year. Historically, Thanksgiving in the United States was designated as a celebration of survival, abundance and a time for reflection on and gratitude for blessings we have received. In proclamations of Thanksgiving both Washington (in 1789) and Lincoln (in 1861) spoke of a time for gratitude, healing, unity and pursuit of peace in the country. The Continental Congress of 1777 included in their proclamation the idea of expressing the grateful feelings of our hearts. Thanksgiving has also included the idea of charity toward others, especially the poor.

Vicki Muir, Licensed Clinical Social Worker

For info. contact: 405-308-6433 8

For many today, Thanksgiving is quite different and has possibly lost some of the original meaning. Americans eat more food on Thanksgiving Day than any other day of the year. WOW! The rest of the day is spent watching parades and of course, football games. Many of us follow our dessert with a long nap in the lounge chair. To add a little flavor to the event I have decided to share an activity designed to create and inspire a moment for reflection and sharing. The product is called GRATITUDE PIE. It is well known that gratitude and counting blessings results in a brighter outlook for the future, fostering feelings of

wellbeing. Reminiscence allows for storytelling and recall of events that have been enjoyed together, as well as a way for younger members to learn about times their elders might share of past events. We often lose precious moments in time by not taking advantage of these opportunities. So, here’s the recipe. Supplies include glue, scissors, magazines and cheap paper plates that don’t have lots of ridges. Also, have crayons or markers on hand. Directions: Using a marker, divide the paper plate into four sections. Have everyone reflect on four things they are truly grateful for. You may need to give examples. This can be a person, event, a kindness or appreciation nature, a pet and so on. Encourage them to think deeply about their experience and express that with pictures and words either from magazines or drawing on each piece of the pie. You might have some typing paper to write about each image, telling the story behind the blessing. This is really a creative process so there is no right or wrong way of expressing grateful feelings from the heart.

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a team of medical professionals sent to your home for diagnosis and treatment.

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+ Strains or sprains + IV fluids + Dehydration It actually reduces stress. For children, modeling this DispatchHealth is able to provide high-quality care for complex injuries and illnesses, including the + Minor fractures + Splinting + Asthma / COPD DispatchHealth DispatchHealth Also Treats: Also Treats: flu. Last year alone, DispatchHealth treated thousands of flu cases, with nearly one-fourth of all visits behavior teaches them to be mindful - as well as helps + Nosebleed + Stitches + And much more being Treats: flu-related during the 2018 - 2019 season. DispatchHealth Also + Facial injuries / vertigo + Falls + Dizziness +/ Dizziness vertigo + IV placement + IV placement + Nausea + Nausea them develop positive attitudes.

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DispatchHealth Also Treats: + Splinting + Splinting + Minor + Minor fractures + Asthma / +COPD Asthma / CO Another component that I want to stress at this time is fractures + Strains or sprains + IV +fluids Dehydration + Nosebleed Nosebleed Stitches + Stitches + And+much +more And much mo ++ Dizziness / vertigo + IV placement + Nausea the idea of sharing and caring for others who are less ++ Strains or sprains + IV fluids + Falls + Dehydration Care: Facial Request injuries Facial injuries + Splinting + Falls Minor fractures + Asthma / CO fortunate than we are. This has always+been part of+ the + Minor fractures + Splinting + Asthma / COPD Phone: 1.866.FLU.CREW (1.866.358.2739) + Nosebleed + Stitches + And much more Nosebleed + Stitches + And much mor tradition of Thanksgiving. As you view +your Gratitude Website: DispatchHealth.com/flucrew | Available 7 Days A Week DispatchHealth DispatchHealth can treat nearly can treat everything nearly an everything emergency room emergency can. room can. + FacialDispatchHealth injuries + Falls can treatannearly everything Pie, begin to think about how you can contribute acts + Facial injuries + Falls DispatchHealth accepts most insurance, including Medicare and Medicaid. DispatchHealth can treat nearly an emergencyroom room can. can. an everything emergency of kindness to your family, but also to others who may need a helping hand (or can just benefitDispatchHealth from a smileRequest or can treat nearly everything an emergency room can. Care: Request Care: Request Care: other happy greeting). Phone: 1.866.FLU.CREW Phone: 1.866.FLU.CREW (1.866.358.2739) (1.866.358.2739)

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So, I hope this is something you might give a try. By all DispatchHealth most insurance, including Medicare Medicare and Medicaid. DispatchHealth DispatchHealth acceptsaccepts mostaccepts insurance, mostincluding insurance, including and Medicare Medicaid. and Medicaid. Request Care: means, enjoy that delicious GRATITUDE PIE! Blessings, and a very Happy Thanksgiving to all. Phone: 1.866.FLU.CREW (1.866.358.2739) Website: DispatchHealth.com/flucrew | Available 7 Days A Week

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MOVING FAST FAST MOVING PAST OUR OUR PAST PAST PAST By Michael Edward Browning

What constitutes an heirloom any more? With our increasingly mobile and disposable first world culture, does anyone even care about keepsakes these days? Sure, we tend to take notice when an item costs a lot, but what of those pricelessly “worthless” prized possessions of yesteryear? What of our aunts’ purses from the Great Depression or the hand-me-down quilts from the Civil War? What of uncle Kenny’s Winchester? And furniture, forget it! Who wants that old Murphy bed or oak roll-top desk, they weigh a ton! When I turned 21 my father gave me three things he had carried (or wore) for years. Four if you consider that the Tiger’s Eye cufflinks and gold ring are three separate pieces. The fourth was a silver dollar money clip. He had passed on somewhat of a numismatic passion and I immediately took to the money clip. It was actually a clip attached to a round clamp on a real dollar. Very old-school cool. I carried that silver in my own pocket for years as well. But if you asked me today where it is, I couldn’t tell. Life moves faster these days. It’s a digital age. Which makes me wonder if that’s where our heirlooms are headed. Cyberspace? I spoke with a gentleman in independent senior

living the other day, he has a few keepsakes, including an eight-day mantle clock. None are in his apartment. I used to have a signed lithograph of the image in this article, framed with glass. My sister, a quilter, gave me my own personal queen size blankie with two matching pillows. While I consider both of these keepsakes, I can’t say where they are. I think I might know, but they are not with me. I also have a box of Christmas and birthday cards, including many, many from my cousin Tom’s Santa’s Time Off series, received since the ‘70s. Old greeting cards have no material value, yet I’ve moved that box of correspondence maybe dozens of times, house to house, state to state. The (actual and) perceived value of the lithograph and quilt are higher in my mind, but the box of cards is more portable. This beach scene reminds me of our annual family reunions on the Pacific coasts of Oregon & Washington. My cotton quilt covers me in an absolute fabric expression of familial love. Both are dear, and not here. But the stamped and postmarked envelopes containing decades old handwritten missives are. As “downsizing” has moved from a euphemism for “laid-off” to a lifestyle goal in the past twenty years, we keep shedding - like dogs in June. Tiny homes don’t

Cover Photography by

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pack bric-a-brac. Big memories are being kept in smaller (Binary, byte-sized) packages in this eraof selfie posting. Will there come a time when all our cataloged accomplishments are kept in a digital format? Passed down to the next generation as a streaming – or instantaneous – download (after thumb drives have become antiques)? That time has actually come, but what happens when Facebook’s servers go the way of MySpace? What of our recent (auto) biographies then? Imagine 23rd century archeologists unearthing what they deem to be a precious artifact in the future, based on it’s well maintained and preserved condition. From out of a lead-lined, triple keyed safe they reveal a “cheap” plastic picture frame with a hundred digital images in perpetual scroll, made in China. But if those hundred images are of relatives they once knew or heard stories about, it may have been the most valuable thing they owned. We all have our own type of time capsule for carrying our memories around. For some of us, it’s all in our mind, that amazing hard drive inside. How do you pass on personal value to the next generation? How, and where,­will they keep it?

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ASK Lisa By Lisa Sydnor

how to “do probate”. While the third daughter struggles with how to proceed with care for parent who is incapacitated, cannot make decisions and has no advance directives, no will, etc. My recommendation for all three situations was to seek legal advice from an attorney. BOUNCE! That is me jumping on my soapbox! Families! You must have the hard conversations! No one wants to think of end-of-life situations, but we must! One of my great grandsons (19 years old) asked for help changing banks. On the way to the credit union, I asked him who else was a signer on the account. His response, “Why would I have another signer?” So I explained to the best of my ability, what would happen to his account if he were unable to make decisions. I encouraged him to talk with his mother and make a decision as to who he would add. Yes, he is only 19. But, life can change in a split second.

Recently, I have received three calls from daughters trying to handle decisions regarding property and care of a parent. One needs to know what and how to prepare legal documents as dementia progressively takes her mother’s ability to function on her own behalf. I have initiated several difficult conversations with my family reAnother is trying to navigate what happens after the death of the parent regarding the will cently. My actions were primarily due to my friend, Julie Dais, who made me stop, listen and act on information she shared with me. and division of property among siblings and

ee

Fr

We’ve been taught How to get things, not how to lose them. AWARE Grief Intensives Shanna Chechovsky Lawson,LCSW

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My initial response was, “I don’t have anything.” Julie held my feet to the fire; stopping by my office periodically to ask what I had accomplished; admonishing me to stop procrastinating. Thanks to Julie I have my end-oflife decisions on paper; documents designating medical and financial power of attorney, a will, and, my wishes (in writing, for me and my “stuff”, in the event I cannot make decisions). Also, my son has a copy of EVERYTHING! Literally, everything, so there will be no searching through stacks/boxes/drawers of paper looking for documents.

once you inventory your retirement & bank accounts, your mineral rights, rare collections...you have more than you realize! Pay special attention to assets that you can allocate to loved ones or charity through beneficiary designations, i.e. payable on death designations (POD) for bank accounts, stocks, cars, even real estate. NOW is the time to do this inventory. NOW is the time to talk to family about your end of life decisions. NOW is the time to make plans to build a legacy to your church and charities. NOW is the time to have this conversation.

Julie graciously agreed to recap our conversations and allow me to share with you.

Once you have this conversation and you have your inventory, go to an estate planning attorney to form a plan that is best for you and your family. Your estate plan will give your loved ones a legacy of love that will be of great comfort. NOW is the time.

What will happen to your stuff? Really, what will happen to your stuff when you pass away? If you don’t know the answer, or if you don’t have an estate plan in place, then the state of Oklahoma will answer this question for you. Without an estate plan, the state of Oklahoma will dictate the allocation of your stuff (assets).

The ministry of The Salvation Army Planned Giving Department has resources to get you started with no obligation. You may call Julie Dais, Associate Planned Giving Director at 405-254-1140 or email julie.dais@uss. salvationarmy.org.

What is an estate plan? Basically, it is a plan of action as to where your cash, retirement assets, house, and personal items are to be distributed upon your death. Often this is accomplished via a document such as a will or trust. You might think you ‘don’t have that much’; but

Footnote: Estate planning and probate can be costly. However, being prepared could save much grief, stress and heartache - as well as added costs. Watch for the date of the next “Scary Conversations” event sponsored by CAREGIVER Magazine.

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Coordinating Caregiver Support By Lisa Sydnor

November is National Caregivers Month honoring the millions of Americans who care for a loved one with a chronic condition, disability or the frailties of old age. Caregivers play a critical role in the health and well being of our country’s Veterans. At Oklahoma City VA Medical Center, Sandra Engles, MSW, LCSW, and Christy Pargeter, MSW, LCSW, both VA Caregiver Support Coordinators, have a passion for serving our Veterans and ensuring their caregivers have access to available services and support. The VA identifies a caregiver as someone who provides personal care services for a Veteran. The services could include assistance with daily living activities like personal hygiene or providing supervision to ensure the safety of the Veteran. A caregiver can be a spouse, significant other, adult child, parent, family member or a friend. The VA Caregiver Support Program offers training, educational resources, and multiple tools to guide and encourage caregivers as they struggle to stay strong and focused. Under the Program of General Caregiver Support Services (PGCSS) eligible Veterans of all eras may benefit.

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In Oklahoma, 30% of caregivers pre-decease the one they are caring for. The VA Caregiver Support line (1-855-260-3274) offers help. It is critical to the care recipient, caregiver, and family. Call with any caregiving question you have, they’ll help you find an answer. Some of the resources available at www. caregiver.va.gov/Care_Caregivers.asp are: · VA Caregiver Support Line · Peer Support Mentoring Program · Building Better Caregivers (free online workshop) · Comprehensive Assistance for Family Caregivers · REACH VA (work with a trained and certified REACH VA Program Coach) Generally, the level of care needed increases, not lessens. It quickly becomes obvious another situation is a concern: caregiver exhaustion. Caregivers and their extended family often suffer from grief, isolation and exhaustion – physical, mental, emotional and physiological. No one takes care of the caregivers. According to research, literally millions of caregivers are suffering from burnout; experiencing emotional breakdowns; becoming physically ill and, sadly, committing suicide or succumbing to their own health issues.

The Veterans Administration recognizes the need for caregivers - which the VA Caregiver Program provides guidance to – accessing the support services available. As part of the VA MISSION Act (read the whole thing at www.missionact.va.gov), the VA is working to increase access to the Program of Comprehensive Assistance for Family Caregivers (PCAFC, eligibility and applications can be found at www.caregiver.va.gov/support/support_benefits. asp), which is now only available to eligible Veterans injured in the line of duty on or after September 11, 2001. As noted above, vets of all eras are eligible for services from PGCSS. The purpose, no, the mission, of this publication is to provide information, share stories, identify resources, bring difficult issues into the light, assure caregivers that they are not alone and shine a light on HOPE! It is okay to laugh, take a day off, take a trip, take a nap or a bubble bath, or play a game of golf. It is essential to your mental and physical health to rejuvenate and restore your energies. Take time for you. Everyone will benefit.

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to listeners playing “Tag the Tahoe”. The show also highlights a “Senior Salute of the Week”, in which over 840 seniors have been saluted for their life of service. “Giving away money! Saving Oklahomans money! And getting to meet and salute so many incredible people every week are a driving force in what we do at the office every day,” says Eunice Khoury.

BIZ 2 BRAND PROFILE WELL PRESERVED ADVISORY GROUP GET IN TOUCH WITH US AT 1-405-606-4893

Well Preserved Advisory Group was founded in 1989 as the Eunice Khoury Insurance Agency. Since that time, “Eunice” has become a household name to thousands of Oklahomans as the host of the longest running senior focused radio show in Oklahoma, Well Preserved with Eunice Khoury on 1000 KTOK. In fact, in 2019, the Well Preservedradio show had the highest rated Saturday listening audience for KTOK radio station. Between Well Preserved and show sponsors, Well Preserved has given away over $14,600

Give Patti a call here in OKC at (405) 315-3844 or Tiffany in Tulsa at (918) 488-0004. We’re here to help! anything. Ask us a

Owner Amber Bergerson

Ten years ago, her son, Patrick Munnerlyn joined the agency with Eunice. With Patrick on board, Well Preserved was able to begin offering investment recommendations, portfolio management and retirement planning. As the costs of senior living and healthcare continue to rise, Well Preserved Advisory Group continues to evolve and grow - to help clients and families prepare for these

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Tulsa Tiffany Light (918) 488-0004 Oklahoma City Patti Hamlin (405) 315-3844

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So far in 2019, Well Preserved Advisory Group has already saved their clients over One Million dollars in annual savings on their healthcare plans. Specializing in Medicare options, long-term care planning, and retirement planning, Eunice has been able to combine her passions of faith, family, senior advocacy, and making a difference in her clients’ lives each day.

Disposition of Items Not Going to Your New Home • Ship or store items going to family and friends • Arrange for an estate sale and donations

challenges and be ready for the unexpected. This year, Well Preserved Advisory Group, continues to grow to meet the needs of Oklahomans by expanding their services to provide health insurance counseling to anyone under the age of 65. Margaret Abeyta is not only the cheerful voice on the line when clients call or come to the office…she is also an independent insurance agent specializing in health insurance for anyone under the age of 65. Open enrollment dates for these programs are from November 1st – December 15th. Well Preserved Advisory Group has made the recent addition of Keri Dennis to the team. “I could not be more thrilled to have Keri on board. With her experience in senior healthcare, the insurance industry, and formerly working in US Congressman Tom Cole’s office, she brings a wealth of knowledge with her to our team.” says Eunice. “Keri has a passion for seniors and making a difference that are a perfect match with Well Preserved Advisory Group.” Carolyn Cummings is the friendly face you will see representing Well Preserved at community and senior events across the metro area. Several events that Well Preserved is very proud to host and sponsor throughout the year is the RSVP

Volunteer Banquet. “RSVP is a vital part of our community including volunteers, giving of their time, to ensure that seniors who cannot drive get to their doctor’s appointments,” says Carolyn. Planning for the 4th Quarter of Your Life event at Crossings Community Church is quickly becoming one of the most widely attended educational events for seniors and caregivers each year.

TESTIMONIALS

"

“We have a special connection with caregivers and want to make sure they have every resource available to them at all times,” relates Keri. “This is why we work with the Alzheimer’s Association on The Longest Day, why Eunice is a board member of the Frank Broyles Foundation, and why we sponsor the Santa Market. We love the caregiver!” Well Preserved Advisory Group is a unique insurance agency that opened its doors at 4800 N Mayfair Dr. over fifteen years ago. They are your healthcare insurance specialists who: • Meet the needs of seniors • Advocate for the needs of seniors • Educate on the needs of seniors. Please drop by their office anytime and don’t forget to give Benji a treat!

If your business is interested in being featured in Biz 2 Brand Call LaShanya Nash at 405-532-6957

If your business is interested in being featured in Biz 2 Brand Call LaShanya Nash at 405-532-6957 17

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Thanksgiving? Yum! Christmas? Yes! It’s hard to believe but yet another holiday season is upon us. It’s a time for giving, receiving, and grieving. Grieving? Who wants to grieve at this time of year? No one really does, of course, but it is now that for many, feelings of loss are intensified.

We grieve because we have lost something very dear and precious, and in the midst of our grief, it is hard to see our way out. Sure, we tell ourselves, things will get better. Then memories intrude and our hearts begin to break all over again. And even though we may feel as if we are dying inside, grieving means that we are very much alive.

The holidays are “peak times”, when events are centered on family and tradition. And it’s at these times that we most want things to be as they have always been. If the holiday blues threaten your celebrations, please consider the following. Start new traditions. It’s hard to sit down with family for the customary holiday meal only to see that one empty seat. Your heart tells you that things will never be the same. It’s at these times that change, as in the establishment of new traditions, can help you get through. Are you always the host? Let someone else be the chef. Do

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you always open presents on Christmas Day? Open them on Christmas Eve this year. Talk with your family about possible changes. There is no age limit to grief. We should simply be honest with our children when talking about death and divorce. But we should do this according to their developmental age, not their chronological age. Talk with them on their level, but make sure you talk with them. Participate when you can. If you’re feeling down, participate at a level with which you feel comfortable. Try not to isolate yourself. You might even consider volunteering your time to a charitable organization. Inform others of your needs. Help them help you. Above all, talk to someone, even a professional if you feel the need.

Take time to grieve. So many sights, sounds, even smells, will bring back memories. When you feel like crying, and you will, go ahead and let yourself cry. It isn’t healthy to hold back. Whether you take the time to or not, whether you want to or not, you will grieve. You may avoid it for a while but your grief will seek, and find, a less healthy outlet. Pamper yourself. Buy yourself a present, something you’ve always wanted. And you don’t have to wait until the 25th to open it. Pick a day after a particularly rough time and reward yourself for getting through it. Give yourself some breathing room and understand that mood swings are natural.

Finally, remember that the best thing we can give to each other, no matter what time of year it is, is the gift of our time. On behalf of my wonderful friends at Caregiver, and myself, we would like to extend our wishes for a holiday season that is filled with fun and happiness.

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BETTER LATE THAN NEVER? By John Spivey

In the Fall issue of Caregiver, Cindy Longanacre, Denise Glavan Heath and I reviewed the state of hospice, attempting to evaluate this much needed service today – twenty years after the publication of our book, Hospice, A Labor of Love. One of the key observations was that patients are referred to hospice too late, often with only a week left to live. Obviously, with so little time, hospice can only offer so much. Cindy, co-owner of Physician Housecalls, has a lifetime of experience working in every facet of hospice. “Why does this still happen?” I asked her.

“Why, after more than 20 years of hospice in our community, do so many patients and physicians seem conflicted, and unprepared, when end of life discussions become necessary?” Cindy answers, “At the heart of the matter is communication, or the lack thereof. Patients should not assume that their doctor will initiate this dialogue. Some will, at the appropriate time. Others will not, assuming that the patient will ask about it when they’re ready. And that’s a lot of assumptions going on.” “I’ve had physicians tell me that they’re waiting to hear from the patient as to when they would like to discuss end of life care, including moving away from active treatment for cure to a more palliative approach, such as with hospice.”

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“One said – the patient will tell me when they’re ready to talk about transitioning. Though he was directing the care, he was waiting for the patient to tell him, not realizing that the patient was waiting for him.” “Everyone is waiting for someone to broach the subject and therefore, no one does until it’s the very last minute, when it’s painfully obvious to all that now, it’s essentially too late. But it’s never really too late for hospice. It always helps, although that help is limited if the time on hospice care is short.” “I couldn’t begin to count the times patients and their families have said that, in retrospect, they could have benefited from hospice much earlier. There was a point where they realized, especially if they got last minute care, that it would have been appropriate much sooner. Last minute care is still a good thing but it would have made the entire journey so much easier.” Speaking from personal experience, my sister, Mary, benefited enormously from the hospice care she received during the last year of her life. She died of early onset Alzheimer’s in 2017. Working alongside her caregivers at South Park East, Valir Hospice provided an added layer of care that gave us great comfort. Cindy referenced a study that concluded the longer a physician knows a patient, the less accurately they can make a prognosis of life expectancy. You’d think it would be just the opposite. As it turns out, this outcome is the result of a very human characteristic. “What this tells me,” she said, “is that as the doctor-patient relationship deepens over time, it becomes intimate, personal. As

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such, the longer they know them, their sense of responsibility to them quite naturally grows as well. Thus, when the time comes to deal seriously with end of life issues, they are less likely to see it because they don’t want to see it. Not unlike a family member.” “It explains a lot, doesn’t it? Seen in this light, it addresses what may have been the key question

in our discussion last month – why do so many physicians feel as if a patient’s death is their failure?” “From the doctor’s point of view, they feel as if they are failing this person whom they have cared for, for perhaps a lifetime. When the doctor finally sees that not only are they not getting better, they’re doing worse, in spite of all the care that has been provided, they might feel that they have failed.”

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Cindy presented this to her Medical Directors when working in hospice care. The reaction was mixed. One was surprised, one was not. Then another offered this insight. “I’m never the one who sees it. It’s always my nurse. She’s the one who helps them to a room and onto the table. She weighs them and sees things like weight loss as it happens. Over time, she sees - up close and personal - just how frail they have become.” “She also takes the calls from the patient and the family. I don’t really see the frequency of these calls as they get worse. She fields a lot of information for me which I may overlook because, many times, it’s a gradual progression.” “And if I’m being honest, I don’t want to see it.” What a confounding paradox! As Cindy said earlier, the crux of the matter is communication but it’s obviously a many-faceted, complex stumbling block. These conversations are much easier and much more effective if they take place before a serious illness begins. It’s just as important to know why a particular option is chosen as it is to know what option to choose. Many people do not realize that they can schedule an appointment with their doctor to create an Advanced Directive long before they would ever need care as serious as hospice. Physicians can bill Medicare for this kind of advanced care planning. Medicare rolled this billing option out almost ten years ago - to encourage physicians to have just these kinds of conversations. Maybe the solution can be found in patient advocacy. Patient advocacy is not new but it’s a service that may be greatly under-utilized. It can help people navigate the healthcare system. Of course, most of the time, the best advocates are the patients themselves. As you can see, at some point, these decisions will likely become the most important of your life. However one chooses to address this, we must remember that physicians are people too. They are flawed human beings, just like the rest of us, who have chosen a life of service. They have an incredibly difficult role and they deserve our respect and compassion.

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Longterm Care Options in Oklahoma

ASSISTED LIVING

— Brought to you by the Oklahoma Assisted Living Association —

ASSISTED LIVING A home or establishment that may provide assistance with personal care, medications, ambulation, nursing supervision and intermittent or unscheduled nursing care. They cannot provide 24-hour skilled nursing care. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health Mainly Private Pay, LTC Insurance may cover , VA Aid & Attendance, & Tribal Benefits Medicaid Option through DHS (Advantage Waiver)

NURSING HOME A nursing facility that provides 24-hour skilled nursing care and related services for residents who require medical or nursing care. Nursing Home Care Act - October 1, 1980. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health. Nursing homes provide the highest level of care. Options for Medicare/Medicaid

ADULT DAY CARE Provides health, recreational, social and supportive services to impaired adults for more than four hours per day. Participants do not stay in the center overnight. Adult Day Care Act - November 1, 1989 Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health VA allows respite benefits Medicaid Option through DHS (Advantage Waiver)

VETERANS CARE Created in 2013, this program is for residents who are veterans living in the state veteran’s centers. They are licensed as a nursing facility and can provide 24-hour skilled nursing care and related services for residents who require medical or nursing care . Falls under Nursing Home Care Act - May 29, 2013. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health

CONTINUUM OF CARE Combines the services of a nursing facility with an assisted living center or an adult day care center. It is licensed under the Continuum of Care and Assisted Living Act and must also meet requirements applicable to nursing facilities, assisted living centers and adult day care centers. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health Currently inOklahoma, all Continuum of Care’s only have assisted livings. Medicaid Option through DHS (Advantage Waiver) for Assisted Living and Adult Day Care.

RESIDENTIAL CARE HOMES Provide residential accommodations, food service, and supportive assistance. May also provide assistance with meals, dressing, bathing, other personal needs, and medication administration. Cannot provide medical care such as skilled nursing. Residential Care Act - November 1, 1984 Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health A typical residential care resident is younger than other long term care options and only requires assistant with medication administration. NO Options for Medicare/Medicaid

INDEPENDENT SENIOR LIVING/HOME CARE Apartments, cottages, and single-family homes for seniors 55 & over who do not require assistance with daily activities or 24/7 skilled nursing but may benefit from convenient services, senior-friendly surround-ings, and increased social opportunities. NOT Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health. No oversight since they are not licensed. May have “High Acuity” that is receiving Home Health and or Hospice services. 26

For a list of OKALA Members Visit www.OKALA.org Become a member or for more information call 405-235-5000

DEEP Developments for Dementia Care — by Lisa Sydnor Lee Jennings, MD, MSH, Principal Investigator, Oklahoma Healthy Aging Initiatives (OHAI) at Oklahoma Health Science Center, applied for and received five-year funding to establish an Oklahoma Dementia Education Enhancement Program (OK-DEEP) focused exclusively on Alzheimer’s Disease and Related Dementias (ADRD) education and training. The goal is to develop a healthcare workforce that maximizes patient and family caregiver engagement, thereby improving healthcare outcomes for older adults living with ADRD. Special emphasis will be placed on providing the primary care workforce with knowledge and skills to care for older adults living with dementia and supporting community partners to address gaps in dementia health care. In rural America, dementia care is often provided by nonlicensed and informal family caregivers who are purposefully included in this proposal to enhance their knowledge and skills - due to the important contributions they make to dementia care and quality of life for older adults. Meeting four measurable objectives will result in an improved community network of collaborating dementia care partners.

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This will elevate understanding and expertise for dementia care in Oklahoma’s formal and informal health workforce, increasing access to dementia-friendly health systems. The trainees will include; persons living with dementia, family caregivers, community health workers, nursing home direct care workers, primary care providers and health professions trainees.

THESE ARE THE FOUR OBJECTIVES: Objective #1: Develop partnerships between academia, primary care delivery sites, and community-based organizations that support Objectives 2-4 to improve health outcomes for older adults with ADRD. Objective #2: Train primary care providers and health professions students, residents, and fellows to assess and address primary care needs of older adults with ADRD. Objective #3: Transform primary care and nursing home clinical and training environments to become dementia-friendly health systems. Objective #4: Deliver community-based programs that provide persons living with dementia, family caregivers, community health workers, and nursing home direct care workers with knowledge and skills to improve health outcomes for older adults living with ADRD. There are more than 223,000 Oklahomans living with Alzheimer’s Disease and Related Dementia (ADRD). A stakeholder advisory council was formed and met in September. A strong array of partners has been assembled for specialized expertise, resources, and clinical experience sites. A few of the organizations involved with OHAI are: Oklahoma Alzheimer’s Association; Oklahoma Practice-Based Resource Network; Oklahoma City-County Health Department; Oklahoma State Department of Health; Indian Health Service; and Tribal Nations. For more information, contact OHAI at (405) 227-5928.

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In my life, I have found that one of my biggest challenges has been to try to make sense out of a senseless situation. Thus, when someone experiences such trauma, it has sometimes been hard for me to be there for that person because - how can I really comprehend what they are feeling? And I have wondered, like so many, why does God allow things like horrific acts of violence to occur? In 1994, the Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City was the site of one of the most gruesome acts of violence in our nation’s history. 168 souls died on that day in April as the survivors were forced to reckon with this memory for the rest of their lives. Many people came out to help with this horrible tragedy that day. I was working in Edmond at a hospice at the time. Our CEO told me to go immediately to the scene and help. Over the next ten days, I worked triage at the First Presbyterian Hospital. At the Family Center in the First Christian Church, I consoled, and prayed, with the families who were anxiously waiting to find their loved ones. I prayed over the bodies as they were removed from the Murrah Building and taken to the makeshift morgue at the Methodist Church. And finally, I ended up on the fourth floor of the First Christian Church where I, and others, had to give family members the worst news of their lives. The pain and anguish, the grief, was almost more than I could bear. But, with God’s help, I did. Or so I thought. When it was all over, as the days and weeks went by, I found that I too was wounded. I had been traumatized by what I had seen, by what I had heard, smelled and touched. I could not escape the images in my mind. I thought that, over time, the images would diminish. But they did not. I was suffering from PTSD... but I did not know this. 28

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder has become a diagnosis for those who have experienced unimaginable trauma. It is a disorder in which a person has extreme difficulty recovering from a terrifying event. Usually, the term is associated with military people but police, fire fighters, first responders, people who work in the ER, those who have experienced abuse, and those who have been raped – to name just a few - can all become victims of PTSD. These experiences took my life in a new direction. They had prepared me well and I became a trainer for caregivers. I traveled across the country, training people to deal with trauma. But each time I spoke, I found myself re-living the nightmare I witnessed at the bombing site. I couldn’t shake the images in my mind. I was struggling. We cannot change the past. We do not know what the future will bring. Life is life. Bad things happen to good people. All we can do is learn healthy ways to cope, process and manage life’s traumas. If you have experienced trauma and are in need of help, I recommend the following; get the counseling you need. I myself used a form of counseling called EMDR-Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, which allowed me to regain my sense of self and be able to fully live again. There are many emotional therapies available, try to find one that suits you. If you feel a spiritual connection with God, prayer can be a powerful and positive way to find your center and begin making sound decisions on your next steps to get the help you deserve. Don’t suffer alone. Confide in a family member, a friend, a coworker or clergy to help guide you to the resources you need to feel whole again.

WHERE CAN I GO FOR HELP? There are many agencies and resources available. A good place to start is HeartLine at 405-848-CARE(2273). If you are active military or a Veteran, you can call the Veterans Crisis Line at

1-800-273-8255. Press “1”. If you need immediate help, please call 911. First responders are standing by.

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That sense of childlike wonder, which too many set aside to become adults, is a gift always within reach. I know this because I see so many people of all ages able to recapture it, if only once a year. And that’s a pity.

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believed that it couldn’t be as hard as I had been warned. I could do this. I knew I could do this. I knew nothing.

I scowled at her and she laughed. “Cliff and Jenny are how old?”

This was the first Christmas that I would be confronted with the question countless single parents have faced – what happens to our children, deep inside where we cannot see, when dreams of Santa Claus, elves and Sugar Plum Fairies collide with the reality of a broken home? I was putting up Christmas lights, another first, and it showed. My neighbor, Ray Poe, walked over and handed me this handy dandy socket adapter. Always my go-to guy for anything mechanical or electrical, he said, “If you screw this into the socket of your porch light and plug your lights in there, all you have to do is flip the switch and you’re in business.” “Cool!” I said. A gadget. After a while, Ray’s wife, Marilyn, joined us. “Have you got your Christmas shopping done?” she asked, a twinkle in her eye.

“Five and four.” “Perfect,” she said. “Let me tell you what we used to do. After the kids have gone to sleep on Christmas Eve, get a pair of boots, wet the soles and set them in the fireplace so the ashes stick to them. Walk from the fireplace, to the tree, to the cookies and milk and back. Then watch their faces the next morning.” I blinked at her as if she had just swooshed down in a sleigh with the one present I had really wanted. What a great idea! And so on Christmas Eve, I did as she instructed. The next morning, I was more excited than my kids. Camera in hand, I shouted, “OK, come on in!” They charged in squealing, making a beeline for the tree. About the time Cliff grabbed his first present, he saw the tracks, and stopped cold. A beautiful expression of wonder spread across his little round face. Eyes the size of saucers, he followed the path of ashes back and forth, then looked at his sister.

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Oblivious to all else, Jenny feverishly tore at her presents. “Jen,” he said. “What?” she muttered. “Look!” “What!” Then she saw. What . . . she mouthed silently. Like Holmes and Watson, they examined every inch of the living room for five full minutes. “OK, Jen,” he analyzed, “here’s what happened. Santa came down through here, put our presents there, then saw the cookies and milk here…” And I forgot to snap even one photo. Actually, thanks to Ray and Marilyn, I was given two gifts that Christmas so long ago. The first was an opportunity to witness the sheer joy of wide-eyed innocence. The second was the hope that for a while, anyway, my children might be untouched by their new reality. Young or old, the fantasy of Santa Claus is all in how you look at it.

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By Michael Edward Browning

Tealridge Honors Veterans

On this past Veteran’s Day, Edmond Mayor Dan O’Neil honored veterans of every era at Tealridge Retirement Community. Executive Director, Melissa Mahaffey welcomed everyone, then

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Edmond High School North ROTC presented arms. After the singing of the National Anthem, Rick Johnson, Resident Council President introduced the mayor so intimately and informally, it felt like we all knew Dan somewhat closely by the time he got up to speak. Due to the crowd in the room, everyone brought their outdoor voices capably indoors, after some quick audience encouragement to do so. With Rick and Dan verbally sparring (about a car?), it was obvious these two Army guys had been around the block together, maybe twice, over the years. Consistent chuckles drew the crowd in. With his soft-spoken, paternal approach to public speaking, Dan kept the ceremony informal, yet utterly respectful. Honoring Veterans from WWII, Korea, Vietnam, and modern fields of combat (Tealridge staff member, Dee Holcombe, pictured with Dan O’Neil, John Paden, and Melissa Mahaffey), Mayor O’Neil presented Certificates of Appreciation for Service to about two dozen men who served our country. Spouses and widows of Veterans were also honored, with what one might call Certificates of Sacrifice, as they served our country every bit as much as their husbands did. Overall, it was a wonderfully touching day capped by a delicious luncheon. One table was set for the ones who didn’t make it home.

THE BOOK

Dr. Cindy Baugh Dr. Cindy Baugh didn’t know how much caring for her mother would take out of her! At that time, Cindy had been a nurse for more than 20 years. As a Nurse Practitioner she was a caregiver - every day - for multiple patients at Carl Albert Mental Health Clinic (CAMHC). She will be the first to tell you, it is not the same when your patient is also your parent. Because of her demanding caseload and the enormous territory (ten counties) covered by CAMHC, Dr. Baugh was unable to be with her mom at every doctor’s appointment. It only took one doctor visit to realize that her mother was not sharing all the pertinent information - and had not told the new doctor of her heart condition, stints and medication issues. Cindy 35

asked her mother why she didn’t tell the doctor about her heart problems. Her mother stated, “Well, he is not my heart doctor.”

Cindy knew that remembering dates, medicines, and procedures in chronological order would be challenging for her mom and an on-going issue, especially with her mom’s declining health. She created a tool that bridges both worlds; it is simple, yet life-changing. I call it THE BOOK. This book went with Cindy’s mom to every doctor’s appointment, lab visit, every medical procedure. All the papers gathered were punched and inserted into THE BOOK.

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Cindy encouraged her mom to take THE BOOK with her to every appointment. You’d be surprised at how a sequence of appointments or hospital stays run together. The book is great for the caregivers as they have all the info the doctors will request, and if an ambulance is needed – THE BOOK is a life-saver! It is an incredible tool to assist the patient in self-care, keeps caregivers on track and alerts medical staff to concerns. THE BOOK is an easy way to keep your medical life in order, so get started on yours today! Like many useful tools, THE BOOK is simple. I recently made one so my children know where to find my medical information, medication list and doctor contact information. You’ll need a 3-inch, 3-ring binder; a 3-hole punch, plastic sleeves and a cover sheet with patient’s name, age, insurance and Medicare information. Place everything medical-related in this binder. I set mine up

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THE BOOK by doctor, i.e., pulmonologist; cardiologist, primary care, and a specific section for lab reports, radiology and test results. I file the most recent papers on top. I have a calendar for the next year with all my appointments; another sleeve has a list of all my medications, and in another, all the product information on a device implanted to monitor my heart. Because THE BOOK reduces stress on the patient, the caregivers and those doing the medical procedures, Carl Albert Mental Health Clinic incorporated this practice into their integrated care system - and every

patient now has their own copy of THE BOOK. Everything related to their care is readily available so when seeking medical care outside of CAMHC, the patient has all their relevant information for a new medical professional to access. Innovation and creativity at work in rural Oklahoma, Dr. Cindy Baugh has changed lives for many patients, empowering them to better direct their medical care. My family appreciates THE BOOK and it has helped me keep organized. Thank you, Cindy.

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With Michael Edward Browning A sweet reminder of the season, cinnamon enjoys center stage throughout the holidays. Truth is, we’ve been barking up the Cinnamomum tree for centuries. “True” cinnamon is the Ceylon variety (from the bark of Cinnnamomum verum). Cassian is the most commonly used, and researched, as there is simply more of it (sourced from several related varieties of Cinnamomum tree). We now know that cinnamon aids in lowering our blood sugar levels, thus battling the effects of diabetes as well. One 80-something friend tried 500mg supplements twice daily and brought his glucose levels down considerably, almost immediately. While not nutritionally dense, the massive amount of onboard antioxidants do direct battle with the gangs of free radicals roaming our bloodstream. Researchers state,

“Free radicals can lead to cell mutation and DNA damage that can be a predisposing factor for cancer and age-related disorders.” In one study of 26 noted medicinal herbs, Chinese scientists found cinnamon to contain the second most antioxidants of all plants tested, behind cloves. They generally concluded, “Phenolic volatile oils were the principal active ingredients in most spices.” Cinnamon oil is prized for it’s effect combating oxidative stress and chronic inflammation, two of aging’s most reliable allies in effecting the long, slow grind of life.

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Aside from being a seasonal favorite, Cinnamon has been shown to benefit: Alzheimer’s Disease and Related Dementias Cardiovascular Disease Chronic Inflammation High Blood Pressure Hyperglycemia Obesity Pancreatic Disorders Type 2 Diabetes It even tricks diabetes by mimicking insulin. A methylhydroxychalcone polymer within cinnamon will transport and prep the sugars, stimulating, “glucose uptake and glycogen synthesis to a similar level as insulin.” I’ll bet you that cinnamon tastes better than insulin! Never heard anyone rave about his or her delicious insulin rolls. Cinnamon can also regulate blood sugar spikes that occur after eating by slowing the rate at which food moves out of the stomach. It acts like the onramp traffic light that limits how many cars can get onto the freeway at once. Obviously, cinnamon finds a lot of work with bakers, but sweets are only one set of her talents. Several chili chefs I’ve known over my cook-off tasting career swear me to secrecy when they divulge their iconic ingredient. Invariably, it’s cinnamon. In chili (since the secret ingredient is so pervasive, I don’t feel I’ve spilled any one person’s beans with this revelation). It’s also great with squash and other hearty winter soups, pairs well with bay leaf and cumin. It’s even a key in several well-loved dry rubs. Cinnamon’s no slave to sweets or a strangerto savory.

Still, my grandma always said,

“All things in moderation.” Very true sentiment with cinnamon. Too much Cassian can cause liver damage. An organic compound called coumarin is the culprit here. Ceylon contains far less coumarin, and even more antioxidants, so get Ceylon if you can find it. The European Food Safety Authority suggests no more than half a teaspoon of Cassian cinnamon per day. One gram a day of ground powder seems to be a sweet spot - without any danger of overdoing it.

n o m a n n i C

Great for Skin, Hair and Health written by Angela Blake

Since pre-historic times, cinnamon has been a highly-valued spice that holds a place in nearly every kitchen cabinet both in the United States and abroad. The taste and smell instantly bring forth images of warm cookies, cool autumn

So whether you’re trying an extract, oil, dry powder or any type of cinnamon supplementation, check with your doctor first. Especially if you’re on any anti-diabetic medications as the combination can lead to hypoglycemia (low blood pressure). If they okay it, you may find a sweet solution here for keeping your blood sugar from spiking with all the seasonal feasting ahead. As for the rest of us, who doesn’t need a little oxidative stress relief this time of year? Send those free radicals packing with some serious pumpkin spice!

nights, and toasty fires. But, you may be surprised to learn it

Science baked inside this month’s recipe: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19571155 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16190627 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19149749 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3030596/ care.diabetesjournals.org/content/26/12/3215 efsa.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/epdf/10.2903/ j.efsa.2008.793 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11506060 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20854384

MOUTH

belongs in your hygiene cabinet as well.

SKIN If you’re tired of spending money on acne creams and ointments without getting the desired results, it’s time to take a home remedy approach. Just add a little cinnamon powder to lemon juice and you have an effective acne solution. It’s also effective for treating blackheads; just a few drops of fresh lemon juice and a pinch of cinnamon powder should help you in getting effective results.

Since ancient times, cinnamon has been used for treating toothache and combating bad breath. A pinch of cinnamon powder in your mouth helps improve your oral hygiene.

HEALTH The natural healing properties of cinnamon make it a top choice for treating a range of ailments like nausea, colds, and diarrhea. Simply add a touch to a warm cup of tea for an added healthy boost.

HAIR Cinnamon naturally inproves blood circulation and this in turn will allow your hair follicles and scalp to receive more oxygen and nutrients leading to hair that is stronger and more beautiful.

39

Proceed with Caution By Michael Edward Browning

Now with the holidays upon us, it’s time to review our options to maintain peace around the feasting tables. For those who have chosen to recognize their own endocannabinoid system and integrate cannabis therapy into their lives, these gatherings may have been a source of both anxiety and delicate diplomacy. Thankfully, we now have more ways than ever before to medicate, with or without detection. Even, quite publicly. With no lingering aromas to mix with smells coming from the oven.

Don’t End Up in the Punchbowl

While eating your medicine may seem like an obvious go-to approach, I’ll continue to extend a caution. Only attend a lengthy holiday party 40 40

while indulging a cannabis “edible” if you have plenty of on-the-ground personal experience with this ingested delivery method. The delayed onset of the ingestion method may have found company in causing those stories of off-putting, excessive experiences. Osteopathic physician Jason Sims, of Tulsa Higher Care Clinic, relates that, “a novel molecule, 11-OH-THC (or 11-Hydroxy-Δ9tetrahydrocannabinol) is developed from THC (AKA Δ9-tetrahydrocannabinol) as it’s metabolized by our liver that increases psychoactive or “hallucinatory” effects of the total cannabinoid dosage delivered.” In essence, a longer wait for

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A Moment’s Pause Before You Get That Card? Vote To Federally Legalize Marijuana Planned In Congress “The legislation, sponsored by House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jerrold Nadler (D-NY), would remove cannabis from the Controlled Substances Act (CSA) and set aside funding to begin repairing the damage of the war on drugs…The proposal, the Marijuana Opportunity Reinvestment and Expungement (MORE) Act, would also provide for resentencing and expungement of records for people previously convicted of cannabis offenses.” -Forbes, Nov 16th, 2019, Tom Angell

a longer lasting, bigger bang. However, ingestion dosing works extremely well for many conditions and temperaments - once the patient finds what dosage works for them. Experimentation required. Mix a delayed edible effect with some Tryptophan (from the turkey) or some rummy eggnog and you could find your situation overextended considerably from what you may have intended. Like many, many folks, if you’re considering using it for pain, try going direct to the source, topically. There are creams, lotions, salves, ointments and transdermal patches to deliver phytocannabinoid relief without ever crossing the blood-brain barrier. No danger of a head high as the CB-1 and CB-2 receptors are found throughout the body. If you are a rookie smoker who has already dealt with potentially being “smelt” around the house, the current array of smokeless cannabis vaping (vaporizing releases the terpenes and cannabinoids at tempera-

tures below incineration) options can help keep you under the radar – and out of any unnecessary, scary conversations! You can find handheld up to tabletop models (often discreetly) designed to vaporize your favorite form of cannabis product, whether oil, flower or crumbly concentrate.

Buyer, Be Very Aware!

Be sure to get your oil-filled cannabis cartridges from a trusted OMMA dispensary. The vapingrelated illnesses (and deaths) you’ve heard about recently were likely attributable to borderless black market THC product diluted with vitamin E derivatives for profitability. Do your due diligence, ask to see the product’s test results before you purchase. Ask your retailer to explain them. If you are on cannabis therapy to assist with a serious disease or you have a compromised immune system, consider having your medicine

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tested by an impartial third party. Both Scissortail Labs (405-788-0247), by the fairgrounds west of downtown, and Express Toxicology (405-216-5788) in Edmond offer discounted senior pricing to OMMA patients for private lab work. Buyer: beware. New regulations are in place, but it’s really up to you to know what you’re putting in your body. That hasn’t changed. What has changed is attitudes and options when it comes to cannabis use and therapy. Smoking is no longer required. Give your mind some space to grow and go into one of those green cross retailers. See what their staff have to delight you with. They’re

sure to have something to keep you indoors and relaxed, able to enjoy your family, and yourself, this holiday season. CANNABIS SECTION CITATIONS: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2689518/ www.quora.com/What-are-the-medicinal-benefits-of-thc11-Is-it-the-same-as-thc-9 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3196989/ www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3570572/ sapiensoup.com/human-metabolism-thc academic.oup.com/jat/article-abstract/16/5/276/797725? redirectedFrom=PDF academic.oup.com/jat/article/41/4/277/2871217 www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/mycotoxins

CBD is available at CVS but THC is another thing altogether. Not too different from getting a prescription, your quick trip to the drugstore comes after filing some “paperwork”. The first things you need to become a registered patient of the Oklahoma Medical Marijuana Authority is an email address and an Internet connection. Then comes your wallet. Surf to: omma.ok.gov www.forbes.com/sites/tomangell/2019/11/16/vote-to-federally-legalize-marijuana-planned-in-congress/#1d7d657201b4

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Remember When? By Lisa Sydnor

My extended family was very large; a family gathering often was more than sixty relatives roaming in and out of my grandparent’s home. I LOVED it! My earliest memories are full of people and food. Being from rural Kansas, raised in the southern hospitality mentality, everything revolved around food. If there was a birth, death, wedding, graduation, holiday or any other celebration – we cooked and ate and we ate well. Remember when Thanksgiving and Christmas always meant cooking, not your ordinary cooking, Holiday cooking. In my family the women, and a couple of men, all contributed their personal culinary favorites, each earning bragging rights for their secret recipes. These were all labors of love; a time to show-off and tempt the palate of the family!

Christmas Morning! Breakfast included eggs, pancakes, waffles, biscuits and gravy, bacon, ham, sausage, hot cereal with thick cream, cinnamon rolls, freshly baked breads and coffee cake. Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner was at 12:30 p.m. We had brisket, ham and two turkeys: an oven roasted and a smoked turkey. My Daddy was very proud of his smoker so smoking the turkey and brisket made for a grand production! Then you had the side dishes; mashed potatoes, giblet gravy, corn on the cob, green beans, cranberry salad, potato salad, garden salad, fresh veggie tray, cheese trays, and the list goes on! 44

Celebrating Holidays ! In the sewing room, there were tables filled with desserts. Pie? Choose from lemon, banana, peach, apple, cherry, pumpkin, chess, pecan, coconut, sweet potato, or chocolate. If cake or cobbler was your favorite, the options included: German chocolate, pineapple upside down cake, chocolate spice, coconut, applesauce, strawberry cream and po’ man’s cake. The cobblers included: cherry, apple, peach and blackberry. Then there were cookies, muffins, cinnamon rolls and coffee cakes, or pumpkin, banana or zucchini breads. Your choice of dessert came with or without real whipped sweet cream topping or freshly churned ice cream. I remember when the buffet was laden with candy – not just any candy, certainly not store bought candy. There were chocolate covered cherries; hand-pulled taffy; three or four different fudges; coconut balls; divinity, bourbon balls, pralines, sugar spiced pecans, and glass candy. All homemade and melt-in-your-mouth exquisite!

Leftovers! My grandmother was the queen of leftovers. You did not waste food. That was a cardinal sin. We lived by the adage “waste not, want not.” I loved potato pancakes and corn fritters, mystery stew and cornbread or the ever popular, unknown origin casserole. As a child and as a young adult beginning my own family, my memories of Thanksgiving and Christmas revolve around a house filled with people, a house filled with love and the smells and flavors of my favorite foods! 45

A Norman Christmas Story EDITOR’S NOTE: The following story is an account of a Nativity play presented Dec. 19, 1965, by children of the First Presbyterian Church in Norman. It originally appeared in The Norman Transcript on Dec. 20, 1965, and was first reprinted on Dec. 16, 1966. It has since been reprinted in newspapers all across the country. As publisher of Caregiver Magazine, it is my true honor and privilege to rekindle this local favorite for the Christmas loving citizens of Oklahoma. Thank you, Robbie Lamberson, for bringing this warm literary tradition to these pages and thank you to the Norman Transcript for keeping it alive for so many years. Robbie returns with On The Lighter Side next month. We here at Caregiver are wishing you all a very, Merry Christmas!

46

A preschool version of the Christmas Story, complete with more than a few last minute improvisations, unfolded before a delighted audience at the First Presbyterian Church Sunday night. The pageant of the Nativity, presented by members of the Cherub and Chapel choirs, in general had proceeded well at dress rehearsal. Mary, Joseph, the shepherds, wise men and other 4 and 5-year-olds in the cast had run more or less smoothly through their assigned parts. The Chapel Choir and a narrator provided the background, and

except for minor entanglements with flowing robes and headdresses, few problems were encountered. Then the Big Night arrived. The first hint of trouble came even before the formal action opened when one of the younger members of the Cherub Choir, a boy of about 2, took a fancy to the doll representing the infant Jesus lying in the manger. Clambering on stage he made a beeline for the crib and was diverted from his goal only by the action of an alert father. The innkeeper, exhibiting a lively proprietary interest in the stable, practiced leaping about the freshly strewn hay until the arrival of Mary and Joseph, whom he escorted proudly to seats beside the crib. The shepherds and white-robed angels arrived soon after. And it was then that the young Cherub, perhaps encouraged by his part as one of the children come to adore the Christ child, decided on another try for the object of his affections in the manger. He squeezed his way through the crowd, grabbed the doll and lifted it from the crib. Mary, reacting like any mother, made a lunge for the swaddling clothes, and a tug of war ensued above the manger.

Joseph, stunned for a moment, gallantly came to Mary’s aid with a swing at the intruder. And the innkeeper, proving not a bad sort after all, picked up a handful of hay and threw it at the would be abductor. The arrival of the harried father, towering some three feet above the rest of the cast, restored peace momentarily. But it was the hay, omitted during dress rehearsal, that caused the eventual downfall. Piled liberally about the tiled floor, it proved a lumpy and slippery footing. One of the shepherds, head bowed above the manger, suddenly went down. He scrambled up and immediately plopped down again. The third time he fell he grabbed the innkeeper; the innkeeper bumped an angel and half the cast toppled like a row of dominoes. But the hay proved a soft cushion — fun to dive into, in fact. Soon the shepherd and innkeeper were competing in swan dives into the straw. A wise man scuffled with an angel whose gilded wings had slipped considerably below their proper place. The Cherub, once more eluding his father, tried unsuccessfully to wrest a crook away from one of the shepherds. The narrator and choir, unfazed by the commotion, continued like troupers to the end; the cast was enticed offstage and peace once more returned to the somewhat disarranged stable. One spectator, his voice still trembling with laughter, was heard to remark as he left the church, “I’m glad I read the Book, ’cause they sure changed the plot!”

47

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