Voice Magazines - Sutton-in-Ashfield and Huthwaite Edition - June 2025

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How has your May been? I saw a meme the other day which said something along the lines of ‘May has mostly been me sweating, drinking and being skint’ and I felt that was pretty accurate for me too! So many bank holidays, so many events and celebrations, pay day can’t come soon enough!! That said, it has been fun, and it has flown by in the blink of an eye but I’m ready for a quiet June!

We’ve had some lovely feedback from last months covers again and we very much hope that you like this month’s as well. As I’ve said before, we try to be different from one month to the next, pretty pictures are all very nice and well, but everyone is different and it’s nice to appeal to different people at different times. So, this month, with it being the ‘Father’s Day’ theme, we couldn’t resist a series of ‘Dad Jokes’. Mr Emily (and I) just so happen to know a man called Paul from the hockey club whom, we feel, quite possibly, is the oracle of all the dad jokes which have ever existed!

If he didn’t create them, then his brain is at the very least, full of a back catalogue that spans back as far as jokes that Tutankhamun heard from his dad!! Thankfully, he sent us some of his material (the clean ones) and his jokes are now throughout the magazines for all to see! (Along with a few of our own). Multiple times over many years, Paul has dragged me, unknowingly, into his joke set up, if he ever has a serious conversation, I simply won’t believe him!! Thanks PB, appreciate your help!

Anyway, long may this BBQ weather continue and where possible, tell some dad jokes, it doesn’t half put a smile on people’s faces!

(And Why

We Secretly Love Them!)

You know a dad joke when you hear one, and we all know someone who simply cannot resist telling them.

It’s the punchline you saw coming a mile off, delivered with complete seriousness, usually followed by that unmistakable smug smile and chuckle.

But where did dad jokes come from, and why do they have such staying power?

The roots of the dad joke probably go back centuries. Puns and wordplay have been part of language for as long as people have been talking. Ancient Roman playwrights like Plautus used puns in their comedies, and Shakespeare famously built entire scenes around groan-worthy jokes.

Puns like;

“Thine face is not worth sunburning.” from Henry V

“You are as a candle, the better burnt out.” from Henry IV Part 2

And a particular favourite of mine…

“I do desire we may be better strangers.” from As You Like It.

But the modern idea of the “dad joke”, silly, safe, and slightly embarrassing, started to form in the 20th century.

In Britain, the rise of television comedies in the ‘60s and 70s brought the lovable, slightly clueless dad character into homes everywhere. Programmes like The Likely Lads, On the Buses and Bless This House featured men whose humour was often rooted in puns, understatement, and awkwardness.

The stereotype of the well-meaning but corny and even embarrassing father figure began to take hold, and so did the jokes. The term “dad joke” itself, however, didn’t become common until much later. By the 1980s, articles and comedians started using the phrase to describe this very specific style of humour. The first recorded use of the term is apparently to be found in the USA in a 1987 Gettysburg Times column.

Why do dad jokes endure?

Psychologists suggest it’s because they are a safe, shared form of humour. They don’t rely on putting others down. Instead, everyone is invited to enjoy (and gently mock) the joke together. According to the British Psychological Society, “dad jokes,” often considered corny, actually help children handle embarrassment and social awkwardness, making them more confident and emotionally strong as they grow.

No one tells a dad joke for the applause.

You know it’s bad.

Your family (or audience) know it’s bad.

You tell it for the groans.

For the eyerolls.

For the teenager muttering “Oh no, not again” under their breath.

You tell it because it’s not about being the funniest person in the room, it’s about sharing a laugh with the people you care about and making the effort to connect, however awkwardly!

It’s a little reminder that laughter doesn’t have to be clever to bring people closer together.

Long live the dad JOKE!

Looking for a change in career, need to learn some new skills to get your business idea off the ground or just want to learn something new?

For course dates, times and to check your eligibility visit ntu.ac.uk/enterprisingashfield

Enterprising Ashfield is offering FREE courses to anyone living or working within the eligible postcodes in and around Kirkby-in-Ashfield and Sutton-in-Ashfield.

Working together to improve mental health and employment in Nottinghamshire

Our five time award-winning programme is open to local people offering free guidance and training to support employment. Choose a pathway that is right for you:

• Rebuilding Mental Health

• Preparing for Work

• Supporting Employers

We have Hubs in Kirkby-in-Ashfield & Sutton-in-Ashfield

For more information or to find your nearest hub please scan the QR code: visit: www.portland.ac.uk/our-locations or call us on: 01623 499193 @portlandcollege www.portland.ac.uk

COMPETITION WINNERS

EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT EGG-CELLENT

We ran the most fabulous competition in our April edition, with fantastic support from local companies and bumper entries from local residents. We wanted to share the pics of the happy winners to show that we didn’t just run off with the gifts ourselves (although we wanted to!!), how happy the winners were and also to remind you all...‘you’ve got to be in it to win it!!’

VOICE MAGAZINES CHOCOLATE BASKET

FAMILY TICKET FOR 2 ADULTS & UP TO 3 CHILDREN NAOMI & SON TOM

FAMILY TICKET FOR 2 ADULTS & UP TO 3 CHILDREN

FAMILY TICKET FOR 2 ADULTS & UP TO 2 CHILDREN

£20 VOUCHER (TO BE USED FOR ONSITE CAMPING/ EVENTS) ELLEN

A GRAZE BOARD & A GLASS OF FIZZ FOR 2 MANDY

THANK YOU

Just to let you know that we have been to the S42 Cafe for our prize. We were warmly welcomed, the staff were extremely pleasant and the food was not only delicious but plentiful (which is an understatement!).We enjoyed ourselves and will be recommending the Cafe to both friends and family. Thanks once again for the prize.

Mandy

Slimming World Recipe Bakewell Trifles

1. Get your oven warmed up to 180°C/fan 160°C/gas 4.

2. Put the eggs and sweetener in a bowl over a pan of boiling water and whisk with an electric hand whisk for 5 minutes or until the eggs have tripled in volume. Take the bowl off the heat and sieve the flour over the top. Using a metal spoon and a figure-of-eight motion, fold the flour and the almond extract into the mixture, then spoon it into a small non-stick loaf tin. Bake for 10-12 minutes or until golden, then leave to cool in the tin.

3. Halve the sponge lengthways and spread with the jam, then

These sweet treats are the perfect combo of two true classics.

Perfect for a Summer party!

cut the sponge into small cubes and arrange in 4 tall glasses. Divide the halved cherries between the glasses, too.

4. Make up the jelly with 300ml boiling water and put to one side until it’s cooled to room temperature, making sure it doesn’t start to set. Divide between the glasses, then chill for 1 hour or until completely set.

5. When the jelly has set, stir the quark through the custard, spoon the custard over the jelly and top with the yogurt. Add the cherries and evenly scatter over the almonds to serve.

• 2 medium eggs

• 1 level tsp sweetener granules

• 2 level tbsp selfraising flour

• 1 tsp almond extract

• 1 level tbsp raspberry jam

• 10 fresh cherries, halved and stoned, plus 4 whole cherries to

decorate (or use raspberries)

• 11.5g sachet Hartley’s sugarfree raspberry jelly crystals

• 4 tbsp plain quark

• 250g low-fat custard

• 160g pot fat-free no-added sugar cherry yogurt

• 10g flaked almonds, toasted, to decorate

A dogs Day out

It’s been a bit hot for walking our furry friends recently but we found a rare cool and cloudy morning to take Flakey out for this much needed adventure.

It was well worth it too. This walk is brill. With a lovely mix of fabulous views, country paths and even a section in Sherwood Pines. There’s something for everybody and everydog!

7 MILE CIRCULAR WALK FROM VICAR WATER COUNTRY PARK

A moderate walk which should take you and your dog around 3 hours to complete. Most of the walk is on paths and trails but there are some lanes where there might be vehicles. Please wear appropriate footwear, especially if it has been wet! And, as always, follow the countryside code.

Starting Point:Vicar Waters Country Park, Mansfield Road, Clipstone, Notts NG21 9AA.

1. From the car park head towards the lake and then turn right, along a footpath keeping the lake on your left. After some distance pass by a metal gate eventually the footpath turns into a lane.

2. Pass’ Bridleways Guest House’ on your right. Shortly after, pass ‘Willow Barn’ on your left. After passing the barn turn left along a lane and signposted bridleway.

3. After some distance and just prior to the lane narrowing into a footpath, bear left and continue along a lane going gently uphill. After a short distance turn left and cross over a stile to continue on a gentle climb along a footpath. Continue along the path for some distance until reaching a stile.

4. Cross over the stile and then keep right staying on the main path. Continue along the main path ignoring all other paths to the left and right for some distance, and then pass by an information board and view point on your left.

5. From this point you will begin to descend twisting and winding as you go. After a marker post on your right, bear right at the information board to folllow a footpath.

6. Continue straight along this path and after a short distance you will begin to descend more sharply. At the bottom of the hill cross over a stile and then turn immediately left along a footpath.

7. Continue along this footpath keeping a lake on your right. Continue until crossing over a wooden footbridge and then turn right to continue along a single track tarmac road keeping the lake on your right.

8. Continue along the edge of the lake until reaching a car park. Staying with the edge of the lake pass through the car park and then over a small wooden footbridge. Immediately after the footbridge, ignore the path on the left and bear right staying with the edge of the lake.

9. After a short distance at a second fork in the path, bear left along a path moving away from the lake. After a short distance follow the main path through a ‘S’ bend passing some picnic tables on your left Continue along this path for some distance keeping a wooden fence on your left.

10. When the fence on your left ends, turn left off the main path onto a footpath. After a short distance and a sharp descent you will cross over a road bridge.

12. Immediately after the bridge pass by a metal gate. After, continue straight along a lane. The lane climbs gently uphill. Upon reaching a fork in the lane bear right and continue uphil. After a short distance you will come to a cross roads of lanes. Cross straight over and continue uphill.

13. After walking for some distance you will come to another crossroads of lanes. At this point turn right and continue straight ahead, passing marker post 10 and for some distance until reaching yet another crossroads of lanes.

14. Turn right again and continue for some distance until reaching a T junction of lanes. Turn right and continue for some distance until the lane begins to bend around to the right.

15. After a very short distance and at another crossroads of lanes with a number ‘6’ marker post on your right, turn left and head downhill along a lane. Continue until reaching the bottom of the hill, pass by a metal gate and pass under a bridge.

16. After passing under the bridge and after a very short distance at a fork in the path bear right and continue uphill. A little further on, and at another fork in the path, bear left and cross over a brick built bridge.

17. Continue straight ahead, climbing gently uphill, and ignore the first path off to the left, then after a short distance, and just prior to a T-junction, take the first path off to the left.

18. Continue along this path for some distance, passing under a canopy of trees. After emerging from the trees follow the path around to the right. Continue to pass some telegraph poles on your right.

19. Upon reaching a fork in the path bear right and pass immediately underneath a bridge. Eventually the path turns into a lane.

20. Continue straight until reaching a T junction of lanes. Turn right along a signposted bridleway and after a short distance pass by ‘Bridleways Guest House’ on your left. Continue straight along this path until reaching the start /finish point and car park.

11. After the bridge bear right to take a path up a short sharp incline. When this path meets another, bear left until this path meets with a lane. Bear left again and continue downhill to pass under a bridge.

This walk is for illustrative purposes only. Voice Magazines Ltd takes no responsibility for anyone who chooses to follow this route and encourages all walkers to obey all byelaws and signs and to respect the area they are walking in, ensuring they pick up all dog mess and obey the countryside code at all times.

COACH TOUR HOLIDAYS

FIRST 4 FASCIAS

All Around the Shire

MAKING DENS

During the school summer holidays, our days seemed endless and filled with adventure.

As children, we would roam about, finding woods in which to play and make dens.

Indoor dens were sheets, blankets or tablecloths draped over any permutation of furniture. A great escape from the reality of the home. This is where tea parties for teddies and dolls might be held, books read and imagination was king.

Outside dens would make use of a clothes horses (or a winter hedge as some called it) again with a covering. In good weather cushions would be allowed outside to furnish the tent. If the clothes line could be lowered, the sheet might be pegged over it. This was a child’s territory. No grownups necessary.

But the most adventurous dens were the ones in the woods. The venue had to be suitable: one with some shelter on the roof and sides and space for a small group of co-builders. Over time, the den would be enlarged and improved by

found bits of cardboard, metal or plastic. The very worst thing that could happen was for another group of children to find it, so secrecy and camouflage was the key.

Paul remembers making dens from disused air raid shelters, pill boxes and workmen’s huts. My memories are of woodland hideaways.

There is a special place in the hearts of children for spaces that are their own: places that are created by them and free from adult intervention.

Happy days.

The Colonel’s Daughter by Rose Tremain feels like a book for people who like to read. That might sound a bit daft; but sometimes books can be about excitement or making you laugh or because you’re interested in a particular subject, or even because it’s the book that won the latest prize.

This book is a collection of short stories. And each is a separate world, from an elderly couple who try to break free of their boring middle class lives with a slightly ill-advised holiday in Florida to a young woman dealing in her own way with the consequences of an unwanted pregnancy. The characters are strong, vibrant, sometimes unlikeable, but each tale has the capacity to perfectly describe people’s lives and the author is brilliant at creating voices and giving you a snapshot of life, which you know actually tells a much bigger story.

Rose Tremain is a great observer of human nature and can be really funny, sometimes in a way that makes you wince. Her writing could be described as slightly offbeat, but she has a brilliant imagination and gives a satisfying sense of completion to every story.

She writes beautifully, hence the attraction for those who enjoy the reading process. And if you like her style, there’s a whole catalogue of novels to go at – some of which have won prizes

Guess the words and Fill in the crossword !

1 Plead with Max to be not good, e.g. (3,7)

5 Voice only a rendering, all of a pace (1,7)

15 Fling hat away to window, over a door (8)

18 Terribly costly corn accelerators (10)

Pitcherwits® are crossword puzzles where some of the clues are in pictures.

Sound easy? It’s not called “Pit-your-wits” for nothing! The mixture of cryptic and picture clues, combined with Professor Rebus’ unique sense of humour, will keep you entertained for hours.

Across 9 Member of climbing club (4)

10 Jut-land - which is bit of a mouthful? (4)

11 Give final, painful cry (5)

12 They’re probably not (even for gamblers!) (4)

14 Little bit of ammunition found in half an ammonite (4) Down

3 I’m optimistic that it’s cleaner inside (3)

4 Feeling belittled by the electric one (3)

6 Living with a big din? That’s awful! (7)

7 Back-chat from a kisser? (3)

13 Such a noise at a boarding-school! (3)

16 Curvy part of the hierarchy? (3)

17 Chilled out, but unwell (3)

Reduced foiled fob attempt (6,3)

Makes possible pole of second son, say (7)

Down, under places described and painted so (9)

Wee rats, nibbling away at woolly one (7)

Litre, 9 Easel, 11 Ashen, 12 Last act, 13 Draw the line.
Inter,
On the inside, 5 Clausal, 6 Hatchet, 10 Liszt, 11 Awake.

SOCIETY MARKERS OF THE YEAR - PART II

We finished last month with Whitsuntide. The next holiday is August Bank Holiday which was once celebrated on the first Monday in August and some years ago was moved to the last Monday in August.

In earlier years, factories and other industries closed for the first 2 weeks in August (Wakes weeks). Families looked forward to the holiday, Blackpool and Skegness being amongst the most popular destinations. Being in England one sometimes has to be tough to survive the weather, but when the weather is good why would we want to be anywhere else?

Halloween at the end of October was never celebrated as it is now, another American inspired commercial opportunity based it seems on “demanding money with menaces”. Bonfire night was another matter. As a child I lived on Sutton Road, Mansfield. A large area of wasteland and woodland now occupied by a major car showroom, was a site for a huge bonfire. All the local children looked forward to seeing the blazing bonfire. We were commemorating the plot which is still the worst terrorist attack attempted on English soil. Had it succeeded it would have done more than blow up Parliament, it would have killed and injured thousands of innocent people in the crowded streets filled with mediaeval buildings. It would have caused untold suffering.

On a lighter note, there used to be a firework called a “Jumping Jack”, which for some obscure reason was banned. When lit on the ground it jumped and seemed to select a victim to follow as

if it had a mind of its own, jumping across the ground and making little girls scream. “Penny bangers” were a favourite of little boys who enjoyed throwing lighted ones at each other! Boys will be boys!

The grand finale of the year is Christmas. Years ago, feasting lasted the whole “Twelve Days of Christmas”. Nowadays Santa Claus still visits. My mother always made sure that we left Santa a glass of sherry and a mince pie to help him on such a busy night. Next morning the empty sherry glass and plate of mince pie crumbs I thought were magical.

The cycle of the year is coming to its end, another year completed, another year to greet.

Goint to the Fair (wakes)

THE PEAK DISTRICT MANDARINS…..

I wrote previously about how exotic Mandarin Ducks, are spreading throughout the UK. Introduced to Britain from China and elsewhere in the Far East, escapees from captive populations established in the wild. There are now well-established and increasing feral populations, mainly in south-eastern England, but also in northern England, Wales, and more sparsely in Scotland. Colonisation is escapees from captivity in wildfowl collections followed by successful wild breeding. The main population is still in southern England but are widely dispersed pockets across the whole country, with birds from individual collections aggregating in their local patch. These gorgeous non-native ducks are mostly absent from the high ground of the Peak and Pennines and the low-lying areas of former fenland in east England, no doubt related to the scarcity of mature trees with suitable nest-holes.

generally nest in tree-holes sometimes located quite high up. Just a few days after hatching, female mandarins try to entice the youngsters to leave the nest site by leaping out and tumbling groundward. The female then leads the ducklings to a nearby waterbody where she will be rejoined by the male who then helps care for and protect the offspring. Apparently, the female will have done most of the work in incubating the eggs and consequently, suffers more stress and exhaustion and has relatively higher mortality rate with a population of only around 80% of the male birds. They also display remarkable behaviour called ‘intraspecific parasitism’ whereby females lay some eggs in the nests of other females. In some cases, up to 46% of clutches were parasitized. This means the workload for the females is shared and the risks from nest failure or predation are spread more widely between nest and broods. Spreading rapidly, in gardens close to rivers they will freely come to feed on bird-tables or on the ground.

These birds are amenable to life in park lakes and along riversides and are popular captive birds because of their remarkably spectacular plumage. Male mandarin ducks have elaborately, decorative plumage sporting distinctive orange feathers on the cheeks, purple chest, and large dorsal, orange feathers sticking up sail-like, and with pale, orangecoloured flanks. Females are duller with grey head and a distinctive white stripe behind the eye, a brown back and mottling on the lower sides. The males also have an amazing pink beak with a white tip.

Mandarins can be relatively shy birds, frequently hiding underneath overhanging tree branches along lakesides or riverbanks but gather in small flocks at favoured locations especially in winter. Unusual for waterfowl, these birds with long-term pair-bonds,

Professor Ian D. Rotherham, researcher, writer, broadcaster on wildlife and environmental issues in the Peak District and elsewhere, is contactable on ianonthewildside@ukeconet.org. Follow his website www.ukeconet.org, blog www.ianswalkonthewildside.wordpress.com/ & Twitter @IanThewildside Bluesky @ianthewildside.bsky.social

MANDARIN DISTRIBUTION MAP
MANDARIN DRAKE
MANDARIN PAIR
MANDARIN DRAKE
MANDARIN DRAKE
MANDARIN PAIR

3.9

3.9m x 225mm x 38mm

Ideal for: Planters Tables Rustic furniture

Decking Shelves Raised beds

Man cave Fencing PROMPT DELIVERY SALE WAS £16 NOW £14!

DRY WOOD

Contact Kevin at KS Timber on 07919 273 909

GARDENERS CALENDAR

Dashing into June, the garden seems to be shouting for our attention. But amid the abundance of containers and bedding plants, roses and early fruit, there is still time to plant.

On the eating side you can plant fast croppers such as French runner beans, peas, sweetcorn and outside cucumbers and continue setting away an ongoing lettuce crop to take you through to the first frosts. Remember with courgettes and cucumbers to keep them well watered and share your tomato feed with them as well. They like a good bed of home-grown compost to retain as much water as possible.

If you have weeds – and who doesn’t – keep them under control as much as possible as they will leach nutrients from the soil and are almost always very strong growers so may crowd out your crops and flowers. This is the time for the Chelsea chop if you want to do it. The name comes from the Chelsea Flower Show and is usually done around the same time – end of May/ early June. The aim is to cut your perennials back by a third to a half. You can use secateurs or shears and the chop will do a number of things. First it will make the plant bushier and less likely to flop and get damaged in wind. Secondly it will produce more flowers, though they may be smaller. Thirdly it may extend the flowering season. Some people like to do it for those reasons. Others prefer the larger blooms and think the weather will determine the flowering season and are prepared to stake their plants. Also, they might not like cutting back just at the time plants are flowering. Purely a personal choice, but worth thinking about.

TOP TIP

Don’t forget water for birds to drink and clean their feathers in. Clean feathers mean they can regulate their body temperature better. And log piles in a shady spot are good for frogs or other amphibians in the heat.

Mon - Fri 8:00am - 4:30pm Sat 8:00am - 2:00pm

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