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JANUARY 30 - FEBRUARY 5, 2019 • CAMPS & SCHOOLS
BY GRAZIELLA SIMONETTI specialsections@antonmediagroup.com
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emperament is made up of innate characteristics that affect the way we respond to the world. These traits are particular to each individual, and parents of multiple children say that no two children have the same temperament. Parenting styles must be flexible to meet the needs of each child based on the latter’s temperament. Knowing your child’s temperament is important. Knowing yours is equally important. Conflicting temperaments can affect how you respond to your child’s behaviors and how children internalize your interactions. Here are some temperament traits to look for:
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Emotional
sensitivity/reactivity
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CAMPS & SCHOOLS • JANUARY 30 - FEBRUARY 5, 2019
Have a temperamental child? Here are some tips to help them be more open with you and with others:
Be Emotionally Sensitive
A reaction to emotions of self and others. Are feelings demonstrated mildly or strongly/dramatically? Is the person aware of the feelings of others?
Communicate with your child about feelings so that they can understand their own emotions as well as the emotion of others.
Activity level Whether a person has an active or sedentary lifestyle. Always onthe-go or seeking quiet and calm activities?
Encourage Emotion Regulation Teach your child ways to manage their own emotions by using calming exercises like deep breathing or yoga.
Sociability/
reaction to new people
The way in which people respond to social situations. Can easily approach new situations and people or more reserved when around new people and places?
Quality of mood The typical mood a person displays. Is usual mood happy and relaxed? Serious? Stern?
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A preference for a predictable schedule or is unpredictable in terms of routines. Is predictability or spontaneity preferred?
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Be an Active Listener
What’s Your Temperament? How easily distracted/how long the attention span lasts. Able to stay on task or moves from one activity to another?
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Ability to stick with a task. Reacts strongly to being told ‘no’ or gives up easily or has a hard time letting go of ideas?
PARENTING MATTERS Graziella Simonetti
Adaptability Ability to cope with change. Is there difficulty with changes in routines and transitions or is personality more “go with the flow?” Having a different temperament from that of your child can be a cause of stress. If your child’s temperament is one of high activity level who is always on the go, whereas you seek quiet activities and prefer to be more sedentary, your child’s energy level may be exhausting and frustrating to you. If you easily approach new situations and people and your child is shy and reserved, you may feel insecure and unsuccessful when trying to help
Engage in active listening with your child at home by reflecting your child’s concerns, providing validation, inquiring more about situations that affect them and helping them to problem solve.
of your child can also be a source of tension. If you are both highly reactive, disagreements may be heated between you two. Being aware of a child’s temperament is important in understanding Being aware of how to effectively parent your child. No temperament is good or bad. We are a child’s temperaadaptable beings capable of fleximent is important in bility. In understanding your child’s temperament, it is possible to adapt understanding how and create a better fit. Some parents will have to work harder as it may not to effectively parent come naturally. With awareness, effort your child. and an understanding of how your temperament style fits with that of your child, you can become more effective in him socially. In not understanding your parenting and feel higher levels of what he is feeling or what worries satisfaction and connection. him, you may question your ability to Graziella Simonetti is a parent help. If you can sit and focus for long educator for EAC Network’s Long Island periods of time and you have a child Parenting Institute and works as an earwho finds it challenging to complete a ly childhood social worker for the New task, you may be easily irritated when York City Department of Education. She helping with homework; this may lead holds an advanced certificate in parent to consistent conflict. A parent sensitive education from Adelphi University and to sounds raising an active and noisy is a NYSPEP credentialed parenting child will likely have a high stress level. educator. Simonetti is a former kinderHaving the same temperament as that garten teacher.
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Teach Perspective-Taking Ask your child about what they think another person might be thinking or feeling about a situation as well as the impact of your child’s behavior on another child’s feelings.
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