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NEWS: Little Big Creek Canyon project extended to 2040, 3ABC
NEWS WORTH GOOGLING SINCE 1998 VOL. 142. NO. 13 | APRIL 1, 2023 | $1,000,000,000.00
Underground sage-grouse fighting ring busted Court date set after May 15, witnesses busy lek counting Jacobius Seltzer Chat GPTimes Writer
Some In-house Photographer
The Gunnison community was shocked to learn that the local newspaper, the GPT Times, had been hiding a sagegrouse fighting ring in its basement. According to sources, the ring had been operating for several years and had attracted participants from across the region. The Gunnison Police Department were alerted to the illegal activity after receiving an anonymous tip and conducted a raid on the newspaper's offices. During the raid, authorities Grouse ring 50A
Local journalists cheer as the final two championship grouse, “Big Chicken” and “One-Eyed Stan,” fight ‘till the end. Large sums of money were bet on the results of the fight, but police eventually seized the money and have since donated it to the Upper Gunnison Water Conservancy District.
OUTSIDE TOMORROW
SUNNY WITH A CHANCE OF sage-grouse meatballs, check out recipe on A2. We are expecting a mix of sun and clouds throughout the day, with scattered showers and thunderstorms in some areas, unless you’re in one of our many donut holes. In that case, good luck to you. Temperatures might be in the mid-50’s, depending on where you are. One minute, you may be basking in the sun, and the next, you could be caught in a sudden downpour. That’s just the nature of the weather tomorrow and yesterday... and today. Make sure to keep an umbrella handy, as well as a light jacket or down coat, in case the temperatures suddenly drop. If you don’t like the weather conditions, just wait five minutes.
SERIOUS NEWS A3 PERSONAL VIEWS A6-A7 BUY AND SELLABLES A18-A21 SWEATY RECREATION B7 IN THE MATRIX GUNNISONTIMES.COM
City cuts deal, Target to replace 100 homes Staff heed call for lower housing prices at Hyper Z Belicimo Bellini Chat GPTimes Writer
Target has announced a new partnership with the City of Gunnison affordable housing board, providing much-needed funding in order to reduce housing costs, in exchange for the rights to develop its new location on the Gunnison Rising subdivision
land. The deal was announced on Monday, marking a significant milestone for both the city and the local community. Hyper Z has been under a lot of scrutiny over what ‘affordable’ means in terms of purchasing a home. Enter Target Corporation, who saw an opportunity to not only help the Hyper Z residents, but also secure a large tax break by writing off their Hyper Z purchase with the IRS. Target will provide funding for the development, which will help fund the construction of new affordable homes, lowering the housing Hyper Z 70A
Belicimo Bellini
WCU on track for new name in 2024 No longer a university, just a state of mind
Harrison Schmoo Chat GPTimes Writer
In a bold move, Western Colorado University has announced that it will change its name (again) in 2024 to “Western State,” as a reflection of the increasing amount of Gen Z
On the hunt for a breath of fresh air? Take aim at the No’ Mo. An oxygen-only smokin’ bar. Conveniently located next to the Alamo Saloon.
students and the institution’s commitment to fostering a transformative state of mind. The decision was made after a five years-long process of consultation and feedback from the university community, including students, faculty, staff and alumni. Although, in an
effort to fund their fourth (or tenth?) name change, the board has decided to partner with Jeff Besos, who will provide robots with advanced AI knowledge to replace all professors and staffs members. A change in state of mind, indeed.
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