WHAT IS “FAMILY” IN FAMILY MINISTRY? By Jodi Rush
You can have wonderful activities, but if members of your congregation don’t feel the word “family” applies to them, they may choose not to participate. Statements like these and others similar are heard all the time: • Family ministry is only for families with young children. • My family lives away from me – so, I cannot participate without them. • Family ministry is only for the younger folks at church. • I do not have a family because I live alone.
Most churches think family ministry should be a priority in the life and programming of their church. This is evident by the naming of activities such as: Family Potlucks, Family Retreats, Family Game Night and other activities with family in the title. The challenge with the word family being used this way is making sure church members know the full scope of the meaning of the word family in relationship to the activities and programming at your church.
Clearly, we have work to do in sharing a more inclusive meaning for this word we use so much in the life of the church. We may think everyone knows the word “family” means everyone is included, but we need to be more intentional in sharing this inclusive meaning with our church members. It is important for all ages and all household configurations to know that they are included in the family ministry plans you are making, especially when they don’t feel they fit the traditional mold. Or, they may find themselves in a new life situation and are grasping at understanding their new reality. Here are some examples in which “family” is being communicated as extending beyond genetic and marriage relationships: • In the world of social work, the term “fictive kin” is used to refer to the idea that family is more than those who are related by blood. Wendy Bryant, member of Mt. Zion Cumberland Presbyterian Church, Falkner, Mississippi, and Deputy Director of Field Operations
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East with Mississippi Department of Child Protection Services shared that in her work, “family” is defined as those that are close to you, support you, and are there for you.
OU R S T O R I E S By Matthew H. Gore
• At the De Mata de Sao Joao Cumberland Presbyterian Church in Brazil, all the adult women of the church who watch over and care for the children and youth are given the title “Tia,” which means “Aunt.” This embraces the idea that we are all “family” working together to care for each other across genetic or marriage lines. • When a child is baptized in the Cumberland Presbyterian Church not only the child’s parents, but the members of the congregation are asked to “promise to share with this child the good news of the gospel, to surround them with love and compassion, and support them through prayer, fellowship, and direction.” • In the Bible in the book of Ruth we are given a great example where a strong bond was created between two women who were not born into the same genetic family unit. Similar relationships across genetic and marriage lines are happening in all our churches. The work we have to do as planners, educators, and pastors is to intentionally communicate the full scope of the meaning of the word “family” often and with emphasis. Our language and communication of what we mean by the word “family” is the first step in nurturing and encouraging these type “fictive kin” relationships and allowing them to have a positive impact on the life of your congregation.
April 26, 1903 March 2, 1979 D M T O n l i n e Au c t i on will take place 1-15 November 2018. Look for us on FACEBOOK as D M T O n l i n e Au c t i on You can also view items at https://cpcmc.org/shop
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