Amber Weigand-Buckley with Dr. Sharon Norris Elliott

At 12:45 AM on May 16th, Dr. Sharon Norris Elliott spoke these words to her husband, James, as he took his final breath. In that sacred moment, as his chest rose once more and then stilled forever, Sharon experienced something she never expected: profound spiritual clarity.

“All the stuff that I write about and I preach about and I teach about—at that moment, it hit me, ‘This is it. This is what we are all doing all of this for.’”

But Sharon’s journey to that bedside began months earlier, on a late December evening when James came to her office door with words that would change everything: “I think you need to take me to the hospital because I’m having this really bad pain in my side.”

“God’s Going to Heal Me”

The diagnosis came a few days later on James’s birthday: liver cancer with a large tumor. For Sharon and James, married 21 years and devoted Christians, the response was immediate and unwavering. James declared, “God’s going to heal me.”

Sharon then covered their home with healing Scriptures on index cards, placing them everywhere James would see them. Their faith became their battle plan. When they met the oncologist, Sharon thought, “This man doesn’t know Jesus. So he’s going to watch Jesus work. It’s going to be a big testimony.”

But faith doesn’t always unfold the way we expect. When the Holy Spirit Rewrites Your Theology

Two weeks before James came home on hospice care, Sharon received what she describes as a pivotal message from the Holy Spirit: “All of My Word is true.” At first, she didn’t understand. They were standing on healing Scriptures—of course God’s Word was true.

But the Spirit pressed deeper: “All of My Word is true.”

Sharon went back through Scripture with fresh eyes. “It then jumped out at me that there’s going to be a resurrection of the just and the unjust,” she recalls. “If Christians didn’t die, that Scripture can’t be true.” She also remembered Psalm 116:15, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints.”

The realization hit her: “So James is going to die.”

This revelation didn’t destroy her faith—it prepared her heart. “It still didn’t become about me,” Sharon says. “I’ve got to walk with him until he gets to where he’s supposed to be.” That’s exactly what Sharon was doing—walking James home to Jesus.

Why Doesn’t Everything Stop?

The full weight of loss didn’t flood in on Sharon immediately. She had been in caregiver mode for months. It wasn’t until the mortuary attendants gently carried James’ body out of their home that reality crashed over her.

“I remember coming back in the house, going into the room where James had been, and looking out of the window at how beautiful a day it was. I wondered why and how it could be such a pretty day. How, why are there cars just driving up and down the street?” Sharon recalls. “And then I just broke down.”

She had transitioned from full-time caregiver to widow in a single moment.

When Facebook Posts Become Purpose

What kept Sharon going wasn’t just her faith—it was having something to do, a purpose already begun. As a writer, speaker, and ministry leader, she had work that had been put on hold during James’s illness. “I had a ministry and I had purpose and a relationship with God apart from my relationship with James,” she explains. “That makes all the difference in the world.” offers hope. “God has a purpose for all of us. What is it that God would want you to do? What’s in your hand?”

What began as monthly Facebook posts on the 16th of each month—sharing how she was doing and processing her grief—gradually became something more. By the third month, other widows began responding, saying her words were helping them express feelings they couldn’t put into words themselves.

Then came another pivitol moment.

Her message is both challenging and encouraging. “God has you here not to just mope around your house. He’s left you here in order to get something done.”

What changed Sharon’s whole outlook? “Grief is supposed to be a season, not a permanent residence.”

Permission to Wear Color Again

Perhaps most importantly, Sharon gives widows permission to experience joy again. “I want them to be able to smile again, to not blame God, and to not become bitter. You serve a God of wonder who is still giving you His favor.”

Her advice is both practical and tender. “It’s okay to take off the black. It’s okay to wear some orange and yellow and appreciate butterflies. I doubt that your husband would have wanted you to just be moping around and not smiling.”

A pastor’s wife approached Sharon at a speaking engagement. She had printed out one of Sharon’s Facebook posts and shared it with their couples’ fellowship. “Reading it saved several marriages,” the woman told her. That’s when the Holy Spirit whispered: “We can do something else with these.”

The result is After Him: A Widow’s First Year Devotional Journal—18 entries that take readers through the grief journey with reflection, Scripture, and journaling space.

Living Significantly: What’s in Your Hand?

Long before her journey through grief, Sharon’s ministry operated under the tagline “Live Significantly.” Now, those words carry even more profound meaning. For widows struggling with grief and lack of purpose, this philosophy becomes especially crucial.

Drawing from biblical examples, Sharon outlines five key questions every grieving woman should ask herself:

Hannah’s Question: What do you have to give away?

Abraham’s Question: Where is God calling you to go?

Noah’s Question: What do you need to build?

David’s Question: Who do you need to confess?

Samuel’s Question: What is God saying to you?

For women who spent their lives taking care of families, this time of grief can feel overwhelming. But Sharon

A Love That Continues

Sharon speaks openly about being comfortable with her identity as “James’s widow”—not as a burden to carry, but as a testament to a great love. Her eyes light up as she thinks of their marriage, “I had a great love in my life.”

She’s learned to think about the funny moments and sweet memories without the sharp pain of grief. She remembers James winking at her during communion services, even when he was supposed to be solemn as a deacon.

“He used to wink at me every opportunity he got,” she recalls with a smile. “But he’s not winking at me now. He’s enjoying looking at Jesus face-to-face.”

Deeper Significance

For widows walking this hard road, Sharon’s message is straightforward: honor the love you shared, grieve fully but don’t set up camp there, and ask yourself “What’s in your hand?” Trust that God still has work for you to do.

“If you’re leaving me, I’m coming with you,” Sharon and James used to tell each other. Now she says, “I’m going with him, but I’m not going right now. I’ve got some stuff to get done first.”

That “stuff” includes not only helping others write their books, but also assisting other widows see that their stories aren’t over—they’re starting a new chapter.

Dr. Sharon Norris Elliott’s book After Him: A Widow’s First Year Devotional Journal is available now. To learn more about her ministry, visit lifethatmatters.net.

“You are looking at Jesus right now.”