30 The Cornell Daily Sun | Graduation Issue 2021
Take-Home Test
Big Red Ambition:161 Things Every Cornellian Should Do
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HOW MANY DID YOU DO? o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o
1. Make the library into your bedroom and have sex in the stacks 2. Finally meet the dazzling Denice Cassaro 3. Go to the Cornell-Harvard men’s hockey game and throw fish on the ice 4. Sing along to the Alma Mater with the marching band at a hockey game 5. Sled down Libe Slope during a snow storm 6. Take Hotel Administration 4300: Introduction to Wines 7. Streak across the Arts Quad 8. Take Psychology 1101: Intro to Psychology 9. Test out Olin Library’s musically calibrated steps by throwing stones on them 10. Attempt sake bombing at Plum Tree in Collegetown 11. Order ice cream at the Dairy Bar 12. Climb the Lindseth climbing wall in Bartels Hall 13. Listen to a full chimes concert from the clock tower and guess the songs played 14. Order the same thing off the Collegetown Bagels menu all four years 15. Register for classes during Freshman Orientation, then switch out of every single one by the time Add/Drop ends 16. Wear flip-flops to class in January 17. Go to the Fuertes Observatory on North Campus and gaze at meteor showers 18. Have a snowball fight in May 19. Milk a cow 20. Skip class to play frisbee on the Arts Quad 21. Bury a bottle of Bacardi on the Slope. Dig it up on Slope Day. 22. Observe the golden hour from the Newman Overlook in the Cornell Plantations 23. Attend the Apple Festival on the Commons 24. Flirt with your professor 25. Bomb a prelim 26. Ace the next one to save your grade 27. Attend Hotelie prom 28. Meet Happy Dave from Okenshields 29. Turn your face blue from screaming at midnight before the first finals 30. Get heartburn at the Chili Cook-off on the Commons 31. Enjoy Ithaca’s two months of warm weather — spend a summer here! 32. Go to a Shabbat dinner at 104 West 33. Watch the AAP students parade down East Avenue on Dragon Day 34. Drive an hour and a half just to visit the closest drive-in movie theater 35. Build a snow penis or count how many you see around campus 36. Dress up and view The Rocky Horror Picture Show at Risley 37. Take a class you think is impossible just for fun 38. Go on a wine tour 39. Kiss on the suspension bridge at midnight 40. Sleep through your alarm for a 1:25 p.m. class 41. Shop at the Friends of the Library Book Sale 42. Get out of a University parking ticket 43. Buy an Ithaca Is Gorges t-shirt, then get sick of wearing it and buy a variation (Ithaca Is Gangsta, Vaginas Are Gorges, Ithaca Is Long Island...) 44. Learn the “Alma Mater,” “Evening Song” and “Give My Regards to Davy” 45. Attend an opening at the Johnson Museum of Art 46. Smuggle food from the dining hall and run for your life as they try to get back your stolen cookies 47. Do the Walk of Shame 48. Have dinner at a professor’s house 49. Get wasted at a professor’s house 50. Take a #selfie with a Cornell president 51. Play a game of tag in the Kroch Library stacks 52. See a play in the Schwartz Center 53. Rush the field at the last home football game of the season 54. Start your freshman year pre-med. Graduate as a Hotelie. 55. Gamble at Turning Stone (try not to lose money) 56. Watch dancers fly through the air at a Bhangra show 57. Have a midnight picnic in the Cornell Botanical Gardens 58. Wait in line for half an hour for a salad at the Terrace 59. Ignore “No Winter Maintenance” signs … slip and fall on the icy stairs 60. Sit in Libe Café when you have no work to do and watch the worried studiers down gallons of coffee 61. Write an angry letter to the editor of The Sun 62. Go to Wegmans on a Friday or Saturday night 63. Explore the secret underground tunnel between Uris and Olin libraries 64. See the library’s Rare Book Collection 65. Pretend you are Harry Potter and study in the A.D. White library (looks like Hogwarts) 66. See the brain collection in Uris Hall 67. Eat at Taverna Banfi and charge it to CornellCard 68. Buy beer at Jason’s in Collegetown and charge it to CityBucks 69. Take Plant Pathology 2010: Magical Mushrooms, Mischievous Molds 70. Take part in a psychology experiment 71. Take an unplanned nap in a library 72. Take over a building 73. Following the legend, watch a virgin cross the Arts Quad and then witness A.D. White and Ezra Cornell shake hands 74. Live through an Ithaca blizzard and tell your friends how you survived frostbite 75. Throw a flaming pumpkin into the gorge 76. Play co-ed intramural innertube water polo 77. Spend all your lectures figuring out the day’s crossword. While sitting for the final, wish you had taken notes instead. 78. Hook up with your T.A. 79. Order a PMP at Shortstop Deli
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80. Play trivia at Rulloff’s on Sunday nights 81. Make the trek down the hill: Go to a townie bar 82. Make a fool of yourself at karaoke at Loco on Tuesday 83. Buy a drink at every on-campus establishment that serves alcohol 84. Go bowling at Helen Newman Lanes 85. Hand out quartercards on Ho Plaza 86. Drive your car up and down Libe Slope or Ho Plaza 87. Have a friend’s parents take you out to eat at John Thomas Steakhouse or Boatyard Grill 88. Eat a chicken parm sandwich from Louie’s Lunch 89. Order at Wings Over Ithaca at 3:59 a.m. 90. Get thrown out of Balch Hall 91. Hook up with a freshman 92. Go skinny dipping in a gorge 93. Walk to the Commons and back 94. Go to an a cappella concert 95. Go ice skating at Lynah Rink 96. Instagram the cherry blossoms in the spring 97. Sell back your books; use money to buy alcohol 98. Drink bubble tea 99. Eat a Pinesburger 100. Walk to a fraternity party with your entire freshman floor 101. Go to a fraternity party as a senior; convince yourself you were never one of them 102. Get lost in Collegetown during Orientation Week 103. Get negged at a bar because the bouncer is actually friends with the person whose I.D. you are using 104. See a foreign film at Cinemapolis 105. Eat mongo at RPCC 106. See a concert at Barton Hall 107. Gain the freshman 15. Pay $145 for a gym membership and don’t go 108. Eat brunch on North Campus 109. Go to Buttermilk Falls for a hike and to take pictures to put on Instagram to prove you did something outdoorsy 110. Fail your swim test, just for kicks 111. Tailgate for homecoming 112. Model for the Cornell Fashion Collective’s annual fashion show 113. Host a prefrosh 114. Request a song to be played on the clock tower 115. Get guilt-tripped into giving blood 116. Get asked if you are pregnant at Cornell Health (regardless of your gender) 117. Drink with your R.A. 118. Make a chalking; weep when it rains that night 119. Sing drunk on the drunk bus 120. Meet Bill Nye ’77, “The Science Guy,” and give him a hug 121. See how long you can go without doing laundry 122. Go on a road trip to Canada, flirt with the border patrol, smuggle booze back 123. Try to order pizza from a Blue Light phone 124. Go to the sex shop on the Commons 125. Get drunk on Slope Day, run into a vice president 126. Complain about the Slope Day headliners 127. Get tapped for a secret society 128. Go to The Shops at Ithaca Mall, realize it is severely lacking, then drive to Destiny USA in Syracuse 129. Lose a friend over signing a lease in Collegetown 130. Run out of BRBs in March; live off campus events’ free food for the rest of the year 131. Walk holding hands around Beebe Lake 132. Visit the Sciencenter 133. See Yamatai bang it out at Pulse 134. Get J.A.’d for urinating on the Law School 135. Hook up with someone randomly and then see them every day afterward 136. Go to a coffee house in JAM 137. See how many people you can cram into your dorm room 138. Claim a big table near an outlet in Temple of Zeus and occupy it all day 139. Write dirty messages with rocks in the gorge 140. Ride a horse at Oxley Equestrian Center 141. Ring the giant bell in the Botanic Gardens 142. Crash a political rally on Ho Plaza 143. Do the COE ropes course 144. Attend a show at the State Theatre 145. Prank call the CIT HelpDesk 146. Wake up at 7 a.m. for pre-enroll; realize that your choice classes are full anyway 147. Ski at Greek Peak 148. Take a night prelim near the vet school, walk back in the dark 149. Trespass on Alumni Fields 150. Find your way onto the roof of a Cornell building 151. Take the BASICS program 152. Walk to class in the snow, uphill both ways 153. Buy a Cornell-grown apple from a vending machine 154. Furnish an apartment entirely with items from the Dump & Run 155. Eat at each dining hall at least once 156. Ask for an extension on a term paper 157. Take part in Holi and get colorful 158. Pull an all-nighter in the Uris Library Cocktail Lounge 159. Tell a professor what you really think of his/her class 160. Attend a Sun organizational meeting 161. Climb all 161 steps to the top of McGraw Tower