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BRING BACK THE JOY
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Late Laughs
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
The fact that Monkypox can be transmitted through aerosols makes it “similar to the coronavirus.” No, no, no — I can’t go back to Lysol-ing all my monkeys!
Late Laughs
in a phenomenon called “Shrinkflation.” In their defense, corporations say the water’s just very cold.
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
beaches will be open for the summer. New York City beaches are the same as other beaches except, instead of whistles, lifeguards just yell, “Oh!”
Fill in the grid so that every row, every column, and every 3x3 box contains the digits 1 through 9. Solution below
The Late Late Show With James Corden
In the United Kingdom, the four-day celebration surrounding the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee culminated last night [June 5] with 22,000 people attending a concert in front of Buckingham Palace. It was called the Party at the Palace, but we’ll call it Queenchella.
makes a payphone, you just have to pay $1,200 for it.
Jimmy Kimmel Live!
You know yesterday [June 7], here in California, was Primary Election Day. Also known as “There Was an Election Today?” Day. Turnout was low. More
In the United Kingdom, the four-day celebration surrounding the Queen’s Platinum Jubilee culminated last night [June 5] with 22,000 people attending a concert in front of Buckingham Palace. It was called the Party at the Palace, but we’ll call it Queenchella.
Jimmy Kimmel Live!
You know yesterday [June 7], here in California, was Primary Election Day. Also known as “There Was an Election Today?” Day. Turnout was low. More
Elizabeth’s Platinum Jubilee .... The queen, I think, has had enough of these jubilees, because she did not appear in person. Instead, she appeared via hologram .... The crowd sang “God Save the Queen” as the holograndma passed by. At this point, God must be like, “Enough already with the song – I’m doing it! She’s 96! Do you not see me saving the queen?!”
Californians played Wordle yesterday than voted. I can’t imagine not voting. Voting is fun. It’s like taking a Scantron test you can’t fail.
Late Night With Seth Meyers
President Biden spoke from the White House on Tuesday [May 24] and asked when the country will be ready to
Elizabeth’s Platinum Jubilee .... The queen, I think, has had enough of these jubilees, because she did not appear in person. Instead, she appeared via hologram .... The crowd sang “God Save the Queen” as the holograndma passed by. At this point, God must be like, “Enough already with the song – I’m doing it! She’s 96! Do you not see me saving the queen?!”
Late Night With Seth Meyers
President Biden spoke from the White House on Tuesday [May 24] and asked when the country will be ready to stand up to the gun lobby. When we will?! That’s like your landlord saying, “Ew, you gotta do something about these mice!”
Understandably, people are sick of paying higher prices [during this period of inflation], so corporate America has come up with a clever solution: “quietly shrinking package sizes without lowering prices”
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
The fact that Monkypox can be transmitted through aerosols makes it “similar to the coronavirus.” No, no, no — I can’t go back to Lysol-ing all my monkeys!
Understandably, people in a phenomenon called “Shrinkflation.” In their defense, corporations say the water’s just very cold.
A new poll found that Trader Joe’s is the most reputable brand in the country. Yup, at Trader Joe’s you know exactly what you’re going to get: hummus from a white guy in dreadlocks.
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
Tomorrow [May 28] all of New York City’s public
A new poll found that Trader Joe’s is the most reputable brand in the country. Yup, at beaches will be open for the summer. New York City beaches are the same as other beaches except, instead of whistles, lifeguards just yell, “Oh!”
This evening [May 24], President Biden returned to the White House after his five-day trip to Asia .... Biden flew from Japan to Alaska to Washington, D.C., which is also how Spirit Airlines takes you from Boston to Washington, D.C.
The Late Late Show With James Corden
Yesterday [May 23] officials in New York held a ceremony to remove the last public payphone in New York City .... I mean, technically Apple
This evening [May 24], President Biden returned to the White House after his five-day trip to Asia .... Biden flew from Japan to Alaska to Washington, D.C., which is also how Spirit Airlines takes you from Boston to
Washington, D.C.
Californians played Wordle yesterday than voted. I can’t imagine not voting. Voting is fun. It’s like taking a Scantron test you can’t fail.
Most of the focus here in L.A. was on the race for mayor, but there was a lesser-known candidate I noticed on the ballot, named Randy Fudge, who was running for judge. Superior Court Judge ... Fudge .... His website says he has more than 27 years of experience in criminal, civil and administrative law.
Unfortunately, none of that matters because the address of that website is FudgeForJudge.com.
In London over the weekend [June 4 and 5], they had a big to-do for Queen
Most of the focus here in L.A. was on the race for mayor, but there was a lesser-known candidate I noticed on the ballot, named Randy Fudge, who was running for judge. Superior Court Judge ... Fudge .... His website says he has more than 27 years of experience in criminal, civil and administrative law. Unfortunately, none of that matters because the address stand up to the gun lobby. When we will?! That’s like your landlord saying, “Ew, you gotta do something about these mice!”
A romance novelist in Oregon who wrote a blog post titled “How to Murder Your Husband” was convicted yesterday of killing her husband — in case you’re wondering how far you have to go to get someone to read a blog post.
The House select committee investigating the Capitol attack will hold its first public hearing on Thursday, so we can all finally get to the bottom of that thing the entire country watched on live TV in real time ...
A romance novelist in Oregon who wrote a blog post titled “How to Murder Your Husband” was convicted yesterday of killing her husband — in case you’re wondering how far you have to go to get someone to read a blog post.
The House select committee investigating the Capitol attack will hold
