Men Are Like Fine Wine BY RICCARDO TARABELSI
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ver the course of my 20-year restaurant career, I have had the privilege of hearing and seeing some pretty strange things. They say that Stephen King gets all of his horror story ideas, which have turned into best-sellers, by sitting in a booth at restaurants. Then, he casually sips his coffee as he eavesdrops on his neighboring booths’ conversations. That should give you an idea of just what occurs in a restaurant setting. Over the years, I’ve observed blind dates gone awry, couples breaking up, people leaving without paying, and families sitting in silence. I’ve witnessed little kids throwing sauce-drenched pasta, half-eaten chicken strips, forks, knives, straws, crayons, candles, plates, and tantrums. My personal favorite is patrons with split personalities: “What?! The wait is an hour-and-a-half?! This is outrageous! Do you know who I am? This is ridiculous. You have no clue what you’re doing. This is the worst experience ever…” Then, after the meal: “Wow! This was amazing! You’re the best! I’m telling everyone about your restaurant. Can’t wait to come back! Love you!” I’ve seen patrons cry, sob, yell, scream, swear, fight, condescend, and break things. But I’ve also seen the magic… Fiftieth wedding anniversaries, surprise birthday parties for the mom that never gets recognition, proposals, engagements, puppy love, prom nights, hundred-dollar tips, compliments, and bachelorette parties. I remember this one
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